Chapter Text
I shouldn’t have been there. I knew that the second I saw Eddie laughing across the court.
Not the polite fake laugh he used around people he tolerated. Not the tired laugh he gave after twenty-four-hour shifts. No. This one was real. Loose. Easy. Bright enough that I felt something ugly twist hard in my chest.
And Tommy was standing right next to him.
Sweaty gray shirt. Basketball tucked under one arm. Smiling like he belonged there beside Eddie.
I gripped the chain-link fence harder than necessary.
Hen had mentioned the game in passing earlier at the station. Tommy invited Eddie. Eddie said yes immediately. Didn’t even hesitate.
I told myself I didn’t care.
Then I spent forty minutes driving around before somehow ending up at the damn park anyway.
The second Eddie noticed me standing there, his whole face changed.
“Buck?”
There it was.
Attention.
Warm. Confused. Focused completely on me.
And I hated myself for how much I needed that.
Tommy jogged over beside him. “Hey, man. You playing or stalking us?”
I forced out a laugh. “Thought I’d save Diaz from getting embarrassed.”
Eddie smirked immediately. “Please. You haven’t beat me in months.”
That stupid fond look in his eyes nearly knocked the air out of me.
Because for one second it felt normal again.
Then Tommy clapped Eddie on the shoulder and started talking about teams.
And just like that, I disappeared again.
The game started rough.
I played too hard from the beginning. Everyone noticed. Ravi shot me a look once after I nearly knocked some random guy flat going for a rebound.
I didn’t care.
Every time Eddie laughed with Tommy, every time Tommy passed him the ball first, every time Eddie bumped shoulders with him after a shot, something burned hotter under my skin.
I kept telling myself this wasn’t jealousy.
Except it was.
It absolutely was.
Not because of Tommy.
Because Eddie looked happy without me.
That was the part eating me alive.
“Buck, focus!” Eddie yelled after I missed another shot.
I snapped back, “Maybe pass the damn ball then.”
Tommy raised an eyebrow. “Dude, chill.”
“I am chill.”
Lie.
Eddie caught the ball again near center court. He spun around Tommy smoothly, quick and athletic, grinning when Ravi shouted at him.
Then Eddie stole the ball from me.
Clean.
Fast.
Perfect.
“Oh, come on!” I barked.
Eddie laughed while sprinting down the court. “Too slow, Buck!”
And something inside me finally cracked.
I took off after him.
Too fast.
Too angry.
Too desperate.
Eddie barely had time to glance back before I shoved him hard from behind.
The sound happened first.
Sneakers squealing.
Body hitting pavement.
Then the sickening crack.
Everything stopped.
Eddie cried out instantly.
Not loud. Not dramatic.
Worse.
Sharp pain ripped straight out of him while he grabbed his ankle.
“Oh my God,” Ravi muttered.
The basketball rolled slowly across the concrete.
My stomach dropped so fast I thought I was going to throw up.
“Eddie.”
He didn’t answer me.
Tommy got there first, crouching beside him while Eddie’s face twisted white from pain.
“Don’t move,” Tommy said quickly.
I just stood there frozen.
Because I did that.
I hurt him.
Eddie finally looked up at me, breathing hard. Confused more than angry.
“Buck… what the hell?”
I didn’t have an answer.
Not one that didn’t make me sound insane.
The hospital smell stuck to my clothes hours later.
Minor fracture.
Sprain.
Crutches for weeks.
Hen texted me updates because Eddie stopped answering my messages after the third apology.
I deserved that.
By midnight I was standing outside Eddie’s apartment holding a six-pack and enough guilt to drown in.
I almost left twice.
Then the door opened.
Eddie stood there balancing awkwardly on crutches, hair messy, exhaustion written all over his face.
His eyes landed on me.
“You serious right now?”
“I know,” I said immediately. “I know.”
Eddie stared another second before moving aside silently.
I stepped inside carefully.
The apartment felt too quiet.
Usually Christopher filled every corner with noise or questions or music. Tonight there was only tension sitting heavy between us.
Eddie lowered himself carefully onto the couch with a hiss of pain.
I looked away fast. “I’m sorry.”
“Yeah,” he muttered. “You said that already.”
“No, I mean…” I scrubbed both hands down my face. “I mean I don’t know what the hell happened to me.”
Eddie stayed quiet.
And somehow that made it worse.
“I saw you with Tommy,” I admitted finally.
His eyebrows pulled together immediately. “Okay?”
“You looked…” My voice cracked embarrassingly. “Happy.”
Eddie blinked slowly.
“And I know how stupid that sounds,” I rushed out. “I know you’re allowed to have friends and your own life and I swear I’m not trying to control you or anything, but every time you looked at him tonight I just…” I swallowed hard. “I felt like I was losing my mind.”
“Buck.”
“I wasn’t trying to get Tommy’s attention,” I whispered.
That made Eddie go still.
I stared at the floor because I couldn’t handle looking at him.
“I was trying to get yours.”
Silence.
Complete silence.
The confession sat there between us breathing like something alive.
“I know that sounds pathetic,” I said quietly. “But lately it feels like you look at everybody else first now. Tommy. The team. Anyone but me.”
Eddie’s expression softened a little despite himself.
“I didn’t know you felt like that.”
“Because I didn’t want to feel like that.” I laughed bitterly. “You think I wanted to turn into some jealous psycho at a basketball game?”
“You fractured my ankle, Buck.”
My face burned immediately. “I know.”
Eddie leaned back against the couch slowly, studying me in that careful way he always did when he was trying to see past the walls I put up.
“You could’ve just talked to me.”
“I know that too.”
Another silence.
Then Eddie sighed heavily.
“For the record,” he said quietly, “I wasn’t choosing Tommy over you.”
Something painful loosened slightly in my chest.
“He’s just…” Eddie shrugged. “Easy to talk to lately.”
That one stung.
Because I knew why.
I’d been spiraling for weeks. Snapping. Acting weird. Pushing too hard for attention while pretending I didn’t need any.
Meanwhile Tommy got the easy version of Eddie.
The smiles.
The relaxed conversations.
The version I missed.
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” I admitted softly.
Eddie looked at me for a long moment.
Then finally he said, “I think maybe you do.”
And honestly?
That scared me more than the fracture ever could.