Work Text:
*A flying chariot rushes through the sky*
*Kayla taps the bubblehead Python*
"Whoosh! Headshot!"
*Meet the Archer*
"Arching is a good job eh?*
*Chariot turns right*
"It's challenging work, outdoors, I guarantee you will not go hungry, because at the end of the day as long as monster regenerates demigods want them dead"
*A empousa gets headshot, the arrow hitting a cyclops in the arm behind*
"Ahhhh! Ahhhh! Ahhhh!"
*He waves his club around, flailing and falls into a greek fire sockpile beneath*
"Oh."
"BOOOOOOM!"
*Kayla talks on a payphone*
"Will, Will, I am a... ye..."
"Not a crazed bow-woman Will, I am an archer!"
"Well, the difference being, one is a job and the other is mental sickness!"
*Cuts back to the flying chariot*
"I'll be honest with ya: my older brother does not care for it."
*Kayla climbs up a tower and waits for her target*
"I think its' friends saw me."
*Arrows starts flying towards Kayla and she ducks down*
"Yes, yes they did!"
*Time-lapse of Kayla waiting for her target and releases her arrow*
*A dracanae gets stabbed by a celestial bronze sword from the back"
"Feelings? Look man, you know who has a lot of feelings?"
*Cuts back to the flying chariot*
"Ares kids that bludgeon giant scorpions to death with a golf trophy. Professionals have standards."
*Kayla presses F to pay respect over a pile of monster dust*
*Kayla headshots a gryphon, a hellhound and a Stymphalian Bird*
"Have a plan to kill every monster you meet."
*In slow-motion, Kayla pulls an arrow from her quiver, she draws the bow, pointing it directly at the camera, the Sun shines brightly behind her, courtesy of Apollo*
"Whoosh!"
*The screen blacks out*
*TF2 ending music plays*
*Cut back to the pay phone*
"Will , Will p...., yeah , put Austin on the phone!"