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Fourth lived a simple, straightforward life.
There was work, there was love, there was friendship, there was work. And, well. Gemini. There was Gemini who fit into all those somewhere; Gemini The Puzzle Piece who found a way to slot into Fourth’s symmetrical life as if Fourth wouldn’t be complete if he wasn’t there. The places that he managed to find in Fourth’s vacuum were. Impressive. Hm.
Anyway, so there was work, love, and friendship, and Gemini (Gemini wasn’t apart from all those things, he just—had his own category), and Fourth was perfectly aware of where he stood in this world, and how much he’d done to fight for it. He was happy here. There was a warmth in him that was so simple and straightforward as well, just as he liked it, just as he knew, hoped, it would remain.
Contrary to popular belief (well. Mostly the Pondphuwin Fandom-belief), Fourth actually gave Pond and Phuwin’s relationship rather less thought. They were cute and very weird (in a good way; in a way that made Fourth lean towards making things simple for them, too, once and for all), and dorky and nerdy and mushy, but there were other things in Fourth’s life.
For two grown men who had so much muscle, Pond and Phuwin sure were a pair of sentimental geese. Fourth snorted a little whenever he remembered the looks on their faces in Khao Yai, on that trip at midnight, when Phuwin’d murmured, I’m so grateful for you guys, and P’Pond had looked about ready to dig up a new well and fill it with his tears. And no, Fourth hadn’t been crying, and if he sniffled once or twice, that was because he was a good and loving friend, not because he was as sentimental and mushy-wishy as PondPhuwin (oh, they came as a pair even in his own head).
Fourth loved Phuwin. Truly. He loved that boy with every silly and serious bone in his body. He wished him nothing but happiness. But Phuwin could be an idiot sometimes. Which Fourth was not going to dwell on because he couldn’t do anything about that, and anyway, he trusted Phuwin to get over his bouts of dumbassery.
He just wished Phuwin wasn’t so quick to tease him, sometimes.
Fourth’s jaw worked as he looked down at his phone, both hands gripping it, his body feeling hot under all the neon lights in the hallway. He wasn’t mad at Phuwin. Hell, he couldn’t be mad at Phuwin if he tried. But this morning, Phuwin’d put him in a jokey headlock, giggling into his ear, How does our Fotfot feel about his date tonight?, and Fourth was ruined. He was a mess of nerves, and embarrassment, and a little bit of anger, too, yeah, because seriously, Phuwin, what the hell.
He dismissed the possibility that it was only so because the said “date” was with Gemini.
Fourth remembered, absurdly, watching P’Pond’s ears change colour from normal to red in real time as he’d called him Phuwin’s faen, and his own face on the phone screen in a small square-frame declaring PondPhuwin were dating (are dating). Fourth was always getting back at Phuwin for at least twenty different things, but the penguin comparison was really taking it too far, and Fourth made sure to get him for that one and also for the time when he called Fourth a loverboy in front of Gemini and their fifty colleagues (five colleagues, actually, whatever). And then, like a strange film changing its sides in the middle of screening, Fourth remembered Gemini’s gaze dropping to his lips, to the sauce, and Gemini wiping at it with a napkin.
He, who teased PondPhuwin whenever he wanted; who saw between two friends a simple and straightforward warmth that fascinated so many people; who was an expert at reading Phuwin’s shy expressions around a specific person; who believed more than anyone that some people belonged rightfully with each other.
What did Fourth Nattawat feel about being shipped with his own partner?
Fine, mostly. He was fine with it. He actually liked Gem, and at least that was mutual. At one point, he might’ve thought that…there was more. Things had changed so much since he had last entertained those delusions. Since any hope had last sang in these distant hills, in these cold deserts. (Melodramatic. He could imagine Phuwin shaking his head.)
It was a simple question. Yes, and straightforward. What did Fourth feel about this? What did Fourth feel for Gemini?
On his phone, a text suddenly popped up: see u in ten
Fourth gripped his phone a little harder, swallowing, and decided that he could go another day without answering those questions.