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“Come on, Geoff why do I have to get left behind?” Gavin whines from where he’s sitting around the board table. His hand, curled tightly into a fist, comes down heavily on the wooden surface and the clunk resonates around the room. Gavin currently resembles a toddler having a tantrum but he doesn’t really care because in his mind the situation visibly isn’t fair.
Geoff sighs, running a hand down his face and serves Gavin with an expression that he thinks clearly explains that the Brit needs to shut his mouth before Geoff shuts it for him (or perhaps gets Ryan to do it instead). Gavin sinks into his chair a little, pouting childishly.
“You get left behind because your job is to jam the security camera feed which means you’re staying wherever the mains to the building happen to be located. Which technically isn’t behind.” Geoff points out.
“It is leaving me behind!” Gavin argues.
“No, leaving you behind would be making you stay at the pent house.” Michael pushes in, eyebrow raised as he sits up in his chair.
“Which, if you keep complaining, Gavin, I might decide to do.” Geoff threatens. Gavin sighs and rolls his eyes but he knows he’s beaten on this. He folds his arms in protest. “Well, excuse me for keeping you out of harm’s way while you do your job. Or would you rather try to hack into their system in the middle of a firefight?”
“Not really…” Gavin mumbles. Geoff smirks. He’s won this round.
“Didn’t think so. Now shut up you big ass baby.”
Gavin thinks back to the meeting this morning as he crouches by the mains to the warehouse they’ve infiltrated. It’s a crude set up he’s come across, located on a balcony ledge above what seems to be the least used room in the building filled with old and abandoned metal parts probably from some failed idea that never left the workshop
The gang seemed to have decided to locate all technology, including the generator for the entire building in here which has its pros. However there are wires poking out that Gavin’s quite sure aren’t safe. The entire rig actually buzzes noisily and he’s not convinced it wouldn’t explode if he was to add just one more appliance to its fragile make up.
Gavin ignores the generator the best he can. In a worst case scenario he’ll pull the plug on the entire buildings power but he hopes it won’t come to that. Gavin’s best at being discreet, jamming security feeds, cutting sound. Once he relocated a feed to Australia so the security guards were graced with a night time view of the Kangaroo enclosure.
Today though he’s gone for the simple white noise and static technique. A few cleverly placed encryptions in the code is all it takes. A couple of wires switched manually around so even if they override the encryptions the feed still won’t show. Gavin’s quite proud honestly. Easy job, easy money.
He’s taking a breather when his laptop starts beeping at him, telling him that someone’s onto his hacks and trying to fix them. Gavin sighs and gets back to work, the plan being to have another code set up to go live the moment the team breaks the original. He types quickly, fingers tapping away until he hears a metal clang nearby.
“Guys?” Gavin calls out with a frown. The crew has been quiet so far, sending in Jeremy to create a path and scope out the goods, but he wouldn’t put it past Ryan to have tripped over something. He glances up for a second but when he gets no reply and sees nothing nearby he shrugs it off and continues his work.
Suddenly there’s a loud bang and a bullet flies past his cheek. Gavin’s eyes go wide and he drops his laptop to the ground, stumbling backwards as he tries to stand up. He’s not the most graceful of men, fumbling for his gun in his back pocket as he tries to spot his attacker.
As Gavin steps backwards again his back connects with the balcony railings. They creak ominously and bend beneath the smallest amount of weight, clearly rusted and weak from age and neglect. Gavin, pulling out his gun with its gold glinting in the sunlight that peers through the cracks in the metal plating of the roof, spots his attacker.
A man stands just meters away from him in a doorway, his gun relaxed in his hand like he hasn’t got a fear in the world. It catches Gavin off guard for a moment, trying to work out this man’s plan and motive. His eyebrows knit, his nose crinkling in confusion but it turns quickly to shock.
The attacker runs straight at him with no warning and it takes only a moment for Gavin to react, to step forward, to pull the trigger and shoot the charging man in the chest. But it’s not quick enough.
Gavin should have shot him before. Should have taken him down before he made a move because now the man’s foot comes up and hits him clear in the chest. He may have taken a bullet but he’s not dead yet, pushing with all of his might as Gavin’s back connects once again with rusted metal designed to stop people from falling but the sheer force of the man’s attack is too much.
The barrier breaks, cracking behind him and the force from the man’s boot pushes Gavin over the edge. As Gavin falls, so does his attacker. Falling forward to the ground, bleeding out from his chest and thud as he hits the ground. He’s dead within a few more seconds.
But Gavin’s problems are far from over as he connects with an abandoned pole of metal. It hits him in the back, piercing his body and coming straight out the other side. No mercy given.
Gavin screams. It’s harsh and pained, cutting through the silence of the room like a knife slicing through butter. Once it starts it doesn’t stop. Continuous and agonising. Gavin screams for his life. Names and curse words tumble from his lips in a fashion that would shock anyone who heard.
If he stops then he fears he’ll never continue, as if screaming if the only thing that’s telling him he’s alive. The pain is overwhelming and even though he hasn’t looked, eyes tight shut, he knows what’s happened. He can feel what’s happened.
People don’t survive this. Humans are not built to survive this. Yet somehow Gavin is filled with determination to make it out of this alive.
He’s still screaming when he hears gunshots in the next room. Yelling coming from his crew and their enemies. Over his own voice he can barely hear them as he cries out, tears spilling hot down his cheeks but he knows they’re there and through his pain addled mind he swears he’s getting closer.
“Gavin?!” A voice yells, echoing as it enters the room. It’s panicked and scared already, not used to the screams of their hacker so distressed. Gavin recognises it as Michael. “Holy shit, Gavin!” He yells again and Gavin hears footsteps sprinting to his side.
The hacker stops yelling, whimpering instead as he clutches at himself but he doesn’t know what to do. Michael doesn’t have a clue either as he crashes to his knees beside Gavin’s mangled torso, hands hovering helplessly.
“What do I do?” Michael croaks out, mouth hanging open as he looks desperately at Gavin.
“I don’t know!” Gavin cries out, “It hurts Michael… I don’t know what you’re supposed to do?” He whimpers. Gavin’s hand reaches out and he grabs hold of Michael’s sleeve for dear life, coating the fabric in blood he didn’t even know was on his hands.
Michael whips around quickly though leaves Gavin the comfort of his clothing.
“Geoff!” He screams, “Geoff!” Michael’s suddenly crying in a way to rival Gavin’s own. Tears fall down his cheeks and drip onto Gavin’s hand. When Geoff doesn’t arrive immediately Michael screams his name again, “GEOFF!” He chokes on his own sobs.
“Michael I’m gonna die… I’m gonna die, Michael.” Gavin says softly, shaking his head. He’s not even looked at his injury; doesn’t want to see what he knows is already there.
“You’re not gonna die. You die and I kill you, okay? I murder where you stand if your heart even fucking thinks of stop beating.” Michael spits out though his eyes are red and watery, his cheeks stained with more than just streak of tears. His entire face is wet but he’s not bothered to dry himself. Gavin’s still clutching onto his sleeve and Michael’s other hand seems to have found its way into Gavin’s open palm, squeezing tight.
“Bit contradictory…” Gavin mumbles. Even on the brink of death he’s cocky and full of fight. Michael laughs through the tears. He sniffs in and Gavin does too. For a moment they forget the situation they’re in as they giggle together, shaking their heads at the cheesy atmosphere they’ve created.
Geoff appears next. There’s blood splattered across his cheek but it’s not his own. It takes approximately three seconds for Geoff to freak out when he sees Gavin.
“Fuck…” He whispers because there’s nothing much more he can do. Geoff has to admit he’s never seen anyone survive this situation, it’s never exactly been common. “Fuck... Gavin. Fuck…”
“Glad you called him through, Michael.” Gavin hisses as he the pole shifts through him. It sparks new pain that courses through him like fire. He screams again. Michael grasps his hand on instinct. No one cares that it’s not usual for them. That they don’t usually show such affection, let alone hold hands. But the situation isn’t usual itself now is it?
“Geoff, fucking do something. Michael snaps with tears still glinting on his cheeks. Geoff winces as their hacker screams his throat raw. He watches Michael’s grip tighten protectively, the look in his eye that he’s never seen before. He knows if he doesn’t save their Brit then Michael will be on the warpath.
But he’s got nothing.
“What am I supposed to do, man?”
“I don’t know…” Michael says, his voice cracking as he begins to sob again. “I don’t know but you’ve gotta be able to do something, right? We’ve got someone that can help?” He begs and Geoff knows that expression on Michael’s face; that look in his eye.
But he’s not sure if Michael knows it.
It’s the same way Geoff looks at Jack.
It’s love.
It’s the promise that if something were to happen to Gavin Free then Michael Jones would never forgive. Whether the Jersey Lad knows it or not; Geoff can tell he’s fallen hard.
“Please… don’t let him die…” Michael whispers but it’s masked by another fresh scream of pain from Gavin. He glances up at Geoff, tears shining in his eyes. “I’ve gotta tell him something first.” He says. Michael sounds broken. His face scrunches up as he tries not to start crying again but his lips tremble and betray him. “He can’t die without knowing, Geoff… please…”
“I understand.” Geoff nods, placing a hand onto Michael’s back gently. “I’ll call through the rest of the crew okay?”
The next few minutes are the tensest the crew has ever experienced. There’s a lot of arguing about what to do but it’s Michael that yells at them all to pull themselves together for Gavin’s sake. They have to if he wants any chance at living.
Gavin whimpers again at the idea that he might die but Michael hushes him sweetly; a side the rest of the crew are shocked to see. Jack passes a look to Geoff as he crouches beside their leader and Geoff nods. The two sharing a silent conversation of discussion and agreement on Michael’s current emotional status.
Ryan, Ray and Jeremy finish off the enemy. They pick the place clean of the living, walking away from their massacre with heavy hearts and the knowledge that they were more brutal than they needed to be.
Jeremy enjoys slitting their throats more than he should have. Ray is more delighted of his head shots with his sniper than he needs to be. Ryan carries out his slaughtering with the most evil of eyes that shine through his mask like a warning to anyone who crosses his path.
When the warehouse is empty except for the dead bodies that litter the ground Jack makes a call to Caleb. Caleb is the CockBite Empire’s go to medic. As a doctor in the Los Santos main hospital the Empire soon recruited the man as a trustworthy ally. Often no one would know a crew member was even there. He writes down each person as someone completely different and, of course, Burnie pays him a handsome fee to do so.
“Hi.” He greets quietly and immediately Caleb knows something’s wrong.
“What’s happened?” He asks and Jack glances over to where Gavin is still lying on the pole. It’s a surprisingly small piece of metal that’s gone through the hacker and there’s not exactly a pool of blood except that that coats his clothes and hands so he assumes no major arteries or organs have been hit. Jack already knows that Gavin is an extremely lucky bastard already.
“It’s Gavin. He got pushed off a balcony and landed on a pole. It’s gone straight through him and-.”
“He’s alive?” Caleb interrupts with disbelief. Even down the phone Jack can imagine the shocked look on their medic’s face.
“Yeah, he’s alive and we want to keep him that way.” Jack says. “What do we do?” He asks, running a hand down his cheek nervously.
“Alright… Okay. Well, you want to get him to me, okay? There’s not much you can do honestly. He won’t survive if you don’t bring him. Get him here. Don’t remove the pole unless you want him to bleed out on the way.”
“Got it. We’re on our way.”
“So, Michael…” Geoff starts at three a.m as he watches the Jersey lad pace across the waiting room of the horrendously pristinely, clean, and bright hospital they’ve landed themselves in. The murderer stands out against the starkness of it all; the white walls and floor contrasting too much with the dried blood that covers his knuckles and the dirt on his clothes.
No one could convince the man to change first.
There’s nobody else in here except Jack and Ray sleeping on a couch because Ryan and Jeremy had gone on a coffee run for the group. Geoff doesn’t stand, just follows Michael around the room with his eyes.
“I know what’s going on.” He says and Michael doesn’t even stop walking.
“Yeah?” He grunts, folding his arms against his jacket and clutching at the material uncomfortably with his fingertips. It’s hard and dry, caked with blood that makes his face scrunch unpleasantly. His eyes close tightly. It wouldn’t phase Michael normally but he’s all too aware that the blood isn’t that of the enemy. It’s not even his own.
It’s Gavin’s.
“I’m not stupid… any fool can see it.” Geoff says vaguely and Michael sighs loudly. He finally stops walking in circles but refuses to face his boss. They’re friends. The entire crew is. They’re all closer than friends usually are; they’d even call themselves a family. But it’s still and odd subject to talk about with your leader.
“Yeah? And what’s that then?” Michael retorts. He chews his top lip nervously, waiting for an answer. He wonders if Geoff will say it outright or if he’ll—.
“You love him.”
“We’re going for outright then…” Michael mutters before he takes a deep breath and turns around. “Yeah.” He says louder this time. “Yeah, I love him Geoff. I love him and I didn’t even realise it until now. I’d felt this way for so long but I didn’t know what it was until tonight. It’s only when he almost died right there that I realised what it was.” He blurts out and Geoff’s eyes widen.
“How long have you felt this way?” Geoff asks softly and Michael shrugs. His eyes fall to the ground as he realises how much he told.
“I dunno…” He mumbles, “Maybe six months?” He suggests. Michael thinks back for a moment. When did this all start? He narrows his eyes and then a suddenly a smile pulls at his lips. “Heh… it was at Ryan’s birthday piss up, you remember? We went out to the bar and we all got drunk… Gavin came up to me and kissed me. I thought it was a drunk joke y’know? But then I thought about it more and I realised I had these… feelings. He’s cute and a lot of his stupid acts are quite endearing y’know? I figure he didn’t like me though, right? He was drunk…”
“But..?” Geoff probes, knowing there’s something more.
“But then this happened and I realised our job is so fucking dangerous. Any one of us could drop dead at any moment. I can’t live knowing I threw away my chance of being with him. Even if he says no… I’ve gotta at least know I tried.” Michael says, dropping into a chair opposite Geoff that groans with the sudden weight.
“He might say yes.”
“He might. I’m not counting on it though. How did you tell Jack you liked him?”
“Oh, I didn’t need to tell him.” Geoff smiles. “He told me. He was so nervous but he just sort of sidled up to me while I was playing a video game and mumbled something about wanting to take me on a date. I was so shocked I accidentally jet packed off the level and ruined my high score so I yelled at him… then I realised what he’d said.” He chuckles gently. “So then I kissed him.”
“Fairy tale story, much?” Michael snorts a little.
“Well I’m sorry Geoff didn’t almost die and give me the perfect and most romantic opportunity available.” Jack mutters as he wakes. He stretches sleepily and glances to the still out Ray before getting up and heading to Geoff’s seat. Their boss smiles.
“It’s a good enough story for me, babe.” He promises as Jack wraps his arms around Geoff’s neck and kisses his cheek. Michael pretends to make gagging motions.
“Such a child, I swear to god…” Geoff mutters. He rolls his eyes and kisses Jack’s lips in return.
It’s at that moment a nurse walks through to the waiting room. Michael immediately gets to his feet, hands clasping together nervously and even Jack and Geoff look up for the news.
“Are you here for Johnathon Price?” The nurse asks. It takes the group a few moments to remember the name that Caleb brought him in under before they nod frantically. “He’s going to be alright. We’ve removed the pole. He’s not hit any organs and we have him sedated on some pretty heavy painkillers.” The nurse explains calmly.
“Can I see him?” Michael asks immediately and she smiles.
“Of course, follow me.” She says, gesturing the way with her clipboard. Michael glances back to Geoff and Jack.
“Do you want to come too?” He asks but the pair shake their heads.
“No, I think you need this moment, don’t you?” Geoff says with a smile. Michael nods, awkwardly scuffing his feet along the polished floor for just a moment.
“Thank you. I’ll let you know how it goes.”
“Gav?” Michael calls into the room as the nurse points him in the right direction. He pokes his head into the room, scared of what he might see. He braces himself for the worst. Limbs removed, a deathly pale face that’ll scar him for life?
He sees none of that.
Instead, Gavin’s sitting up in bed in a hospital gown, a tight white bandage tied around his middle that can only just be seen and more tubes and wires sticking out of him than Michael had even thought about. But he’s grinning like an idiot, staring at what looks to be an apple in is hand and giggling to himself.
“The apple’s talking to me.” Gavin says loudly with a laugh that makes Michael jump where he stands. He frowns a little at the notion and turns to glance at the nurse.
“He’s a little bit out of it because of the painkillers.” She explains with a smile.
“So he’s not exactly gonna retain anything I tell him will he?” Michael asks.
“Not really, no.” She shakes her head. He sighs softly, nibbling on the inside of his cheek. That ruins his plans after all. He doesn’t think it’s fair to tell the Brit his feelings when his brain isn’t co-operating.
“Maybe I should go…” He mumbles, “He probably would want Geoff more than me anyway and I should probably go get changed…” Michael trails off, letting the door fall closed as he starts down the ward. Until he hears a whining.
“Micoo.” A British accent floats down the corridor. Michael stops and turns back, pulling open the door a little.
“Yes Gavvy?” He answers with a sad smile.
“Apple says you got hair like a mop.”
“Apple’s fucking rude.” Michael retorts. He’s oddly offended.
“It’s okay… the apple told me I had a big nose.” Gavin explains with a nod and Michael frowns, stepping inside completely and folding his arms.
“It did?” He asks.
“Yeah…” Gavin replies, his face in a pout as he stares sadly at the apparently talking piece of fruit. Michael walks over to his side, sitting on the edge of the bed carefully.
“Did it hurt your feelings?”
“Yeah.”
“Can I see that apple?” Michael requests.
He puts out his hand for the offensive food as Gavin nods. He relinquishes the apple with a frown and Michael turns it over in his hands for a few moments before he lobs it across the room. It bounces off the toilet door before splatting across the floor.
“Can’t be saying such nasty things anymore, huh?” Michael grins and Gavin claps his hands dopily. He giggles sweetly and beams up at the Jersey lad with pure adoration. Michael has to laugh in return, draping an arm around Gavin’s shoulders and pulling him close for comfort. “How’re you feeling, boi?” He asks.
“Great!” Gavin grins, “Saw Caleb and he kept calling me John… who’s John, Michael? Anyway! They took the pole out and they patched me up all nice and promised me I wasn’t going to die, so that’s always good.” He continues. Words slur as he picks up pace in excitement to tell his story.
“I’m glad you’re not gonna die, Gav, I’ve got some things to tell you.” Michael admits with a smile.
“Ooh! Like a secret?” Gavin yells loudly and Michael laughs again.
“Yeah, like a secret, boi.”
“Tell me now!” Gavin demands. His eyes light up with eagerness and it takes all of Michael’s heart not to give in but he shakes his head anyway.
“Later.” He promises with a nod. “When you’re more coherent.” He says.
Michael allows himself to press a kiss to Gavin’s temple. He takes in the scent of the hacker, lingering for too long to brush it off as friendly affection. He catches sight of the flecks of blood in his longer strands of hair, the dirt that’s still smudged on his cheek as it travels up to his ear.
Gavin doesn’t pull away. He just sits there with a goofy smile on his face but Michael can’t tell if it’s the drugs making him passive or whether he just feels the same way. Either way Gavin enjoys, grinning all the while as Michael makes to stand.
“Where you going?” Gavin whines again when Michael tries to head for the door.
“Thought I’d go grab Geoff and the others. They probably want to see you and—.”
“Stay with me?” Gavin interrupts to ask. He frowns sadly as he watches Michael walking away, putting his arms up like a toddler who wants to be carried. Michael stops and stares for a moment. He knows he should probably get Geoff and the others who are more than likely worried sick as they wait for the news. But Gavin’s innocent pouting face against the terrifying harshness of the background it’s set upon makes him think again.
Gavin looks scared and that’s not normal. It’s not normal for their hacker – smooth and suave in every situation – to look so scared of being alone. Michael nods.
“It’s alright.” He soothes as he comes back to the bed. “I’ll stay.” He nods but Gavin’s lips are already quivering, his cheeks trembling and his eyes filling with tears.
“Micoo…” Gavin whines and Michael hushes him softly.
“I’m here… Hey, look at me. I’m not going anywhere.” He promises, sitting on the edge of the bed and cupping his cheek softly. He wipes away the tears that roll down Gavin’s face, leaving a streak of red behind that pulls from the dried up blood on his finger.
Suddenly Michael’s own hands are shaking as he takes his sleeve to wipe away the mess he’s made of Gavin’s face. He sighs out loudly, resting his forehead against Gavin’s. Neither try to pull away.
“I was so scared of losing you, Gav…” Michael whispers. “For reasons you don’t understand right now. But you will. Soon.” He nods.
“Why..?” Gavin asks in an equal whisper though the drugs make him louder than he realises. Michael chuckles a watery laugh as tears threaten again in his own eyes.
“Not now.” He says.
Gavin doesn’t ask anymore. He lets his head drop forward. It rests on Michael’s chest contently and he listens to the lad’s heartbeat. He expects strong and steady because it’s Michael after all but that’s not what he gets.
Michael’s heart beat races and skips, his breathing forced steady. Gavin glances up.
“Are you okay?” He asks with a frown, his head tilting curiously to one side.
“Perfect.” Michael replies.
They stay there longer than Michael even realises because soon Geoff’s opening the door to Gavin’s room and the two have to pull apart. Gavin sniffs a little, wiping at his eyes as the others come in. Even through the haze of the drugs that tug unfairly at his mind he knows he’s made too much of a scene today. He doesn’t want them to see him crying.
Michael pulls away a little too quickly, arms folding and his thumb up to his mouth where he chews on the nail nervously. Suddenly Geoff’s behind him, one hand on his shoulder and squeezing gently.
“You do it?” Geoff whispers. Michael shakes his head.
“He’s on painkillers… he’s not taking anything in.” Michael whispers in return. Jack’s patting his other shoulder too now and he sighs softly. “You didn’t tell anyone right?”
“Course not.” Jack promises.
The others have moved on during Michael’s conversation and Michael pretends to look interested in what they all have to say. It’s hard though because he has so many thoughts in his head all competing for consideration but none of those are about paying attention to the current situation.
“Hey, Gavin.” Ryan smiles kindly, the first one to approach his bed. There’s a steaming coffee in his hand so when Ryan moves the cup to pat Gavin’s arm gently it’s warm and soft to the touch. Gavin smiles properly.
“Hey, Ryan.” He replies before looking up to see everyone else. “Hey guys.” He smiles again, “I hope I didn’t worry you too much.” He asks and the hacker looks generally anxious. Jeremy comes forward, shaking his head hard.
“We knew you’d be alright.” Jeremy says. He smiles proudly and Gavin smiles back for just a moment before he frowns and glances to the apple that’s laying abandoned on the floor.
“Good.” Gavin tells them sternly. His eyebrows suddenly knit into concern and he looks so serious that Ryan can’t look at him without laughing.
“Why’s your face doing that, Gav?” Ray chuckles and Jeremy elbows him hard in the ribs.
“An apple told me that you’d all think I was being overdramatic.” Gavin says earnestly. His features soften and change as quickly as they’d turned before and now Gavin looks entirely sad. “You don’t hate me, right guys?” He asks, tears filling his eyes.
“What?” Ryan starts, sitting on the edge of the bed with a frown. “Of course we don’t, Gavin!” He promises quickly.
“Hang on… an apple told you this?” Geoff asks in confusion.
Michael snaps out of his stupor a moment later.
“Oh, he’s high on painkillers, guys.” He explains though it’s barely above a mutter and his eye line rarely lifts from the ground. “He thinks the apple talks to him.”
“And where’s the apple now?” Jack asks, looking on the bedside table.
“I threw it at the wall to make it stop talking.” Michael continues. Only now does he look up as he feels Gavin’s eyes burning into his forehead. He offers him a genuine smile of reassurance because the Brit’s looking at him like he knows somethings wrong. “It worked, right Gavvy?”
“Yeah!” Gavin pipes up, jumping a little and pulling at his injury. He hisses in pain and this time both Geoff and Jack start forward to try and help him but Gavin waves them off. “I’m fine.” He giggles gently, holding his stomach with a small grimace because even the best painkillers in the world don’t stave off idiocy.
There’s silence for a moment as everyone looks at each other and Gavin takes in all of their worried faces and silent communication.
“We’re glad you’re okay, Gavin.” Ray says with a nod and Gavin returns it politely.
“I’m totally fine. Caleb says I can go as soon as the fruit stops talking to me.” Gavin explains and the rest of them chuckle. “What?” Gavin pouts at the reaction.
So many friendly faces against the sterile walls. They beam down at him with pride and adoration but Gavin’s only focused on one. He watches Michael’s every move and Michael’s all too aware. He keeps giving him small smiles but there’s only so much he can handle at a time.
“Geoff, can you drive me home so I can get changed?” Michael asks suddenly when he thinks Gavin is successfully distracted by the others. “I think I’ve got a little too much blood on me to really be in a hospital.”
“Sounds like the best place to be with blood on you…”
“Shut up, Ray. Geoff?”
“Yeah, sure buddy.” Geoff nods, “Jack come with me, and we can stop off and get some of Gavin’s stuff from his room at the pent house. I think it’ll be a while before the fruit stops talking, don’t you?”
Michael heads for the door quickly. He wants to disappear without a fuss but…
“Michael?” Gavin asks, head popping up above the rest of the crew. Michael turns with a bright but forced smile.
“Yes, boi?” He responds.
“You leaving?”
“I’m coming back.”
“You promise.”
Michael takes a deep breath.
“I promise.”
It takes a few hours for the group to get home, get changed, pack up Gavin’s stuff and come back. By the time they return Michael’s wearing a soft blue jacket that he normally keeps for slouching around the apartment, a pair of jeans and some clean trainers that don’t track so much mud and blood with every foot step.
He knocks on Gavin’s door to find Ryan and Gavin awake and talking while the rest of the lads sleep on the sofas around the room. Michael coughs to make his entrance known before putting on a smile and walking inside.
“How’re you doing, buddy?” Michael asks. He tries to keep the concern out of his voice because he doesn’t want Gavin thinking he pities him but it seeps in anyway.
“Better.” Gavin nods. “Fruit’s stopped talking.” He chuckles and Michael sighs out in relief. Perhaps now he can get in the conversation he wants.
“Caleb changed his medication into something less brain changing.” Ryan explains with a small laugh. Michael nods along.
“That’s good.” He smiles, “And hey, Ryan? Can I have talk to Gavin in private now that the fruits stopped talking?” He asks.
Ryan frowns up at him for just a moment. His eyes bore into Michael’s own, searching to find the answer to the questions he has but all he finds is Michael pleading with him. He nods silently, getting out of his seat and heading to wake up the other two lads.
Michael slips into the chair Ryan had been occupying; the white plastic oddly warm and uncomfortable but he doesn’t complain much save wriggling around to get used to it. He waits till the other three have left before his mouth opens.
No words leave even then and Gavin’s left to wonder what on earth is going on.
“Okay…” Michael manages to get out, “If I talk to you… you’ve got a clear head right?” He asks and Gavin nods.
“I slept off the medication.” He says, eyes narrowing. “Michael what’s going on?”
“Look… I don’t know how to say this… Well, I do. It should be quite easy actually. But it’s not.” Michael rambles and Gavin decides to lay back in his bed. He stares at the high ceilings as he waits for Michael to get himself together.
“Earlier… I told you….” Michael clasps his hands together and takes a deep breath. “That I was scared of losing you. Terrified actually. But for reasons you didn’t know.”
“Right? That’s a bit blurry… but I think I remember.”
“Well the reason is…” He darts around the subject and Gavin wants to tell him to spit it out but he knows it’s rude. Whatever Michael’s trying to tell him is clearly important. “Look. I like you Gavin… and wow, that sounds so middle-school.” He mutters. Michael’s head falls into his hands and he yells loudly, noise muffled by his own palms.
“Michael?” Gavin says with a small smile that Michael doesn’t see.
“Yeah?” He mumbles.
“I like you too.” Gavin tells him with a nod. Michael brings his head back up with a sigh.
“No, you don’t understand.” He whines like a toddler that’s been misheard. “I don’t like you, I like you.” He tries again and Gavin chuckles. His floppy hair bounces up and down as he laughs, cheeks splitting into a grin that Michael can’t understand.
“I like you too.” Gavin says again.
Now Michael’s just in shock. He slumps back in his seat, staring at Gavin’s bedsheets in disbelief.
“I haven’t forgotten kissing you at the party, Michael.” Gavin tells him with a smile. “I wasn’t just drunk. I mean, I was, that’s why I had the balls to do it really. But it wasn’t a drunk mistake.” He promises. Michael just sighs out again and before he knows it he’s crying.
Michael’s cried far too much in one day.
“I thought you were dead…” Michael sobs, sitting forward in his chair. “And I couldn’t stand the thought of you dying without knowing how much I liked you… that I’m pretty sure I damn well love you Gavin fucking Free. I wasn’t going to tell you because I didn’t want you think it was weird but then I realised either of us could die at any moment so I might as well get over myself y’know?” He explains, eyes red from crying and his throat hoarse and dry.
“Michael you’re an idiot… You could have told me. I wouldn’t have thought you were weird. Bloody hell I think I love you too so we’re just a pair of fools right here.” Gavin chuckles. He’s not crying but then again he’s spent almost the entire day doing just that. He’s pretty sure he’s run out of tears to cry if that’s even possible.
Michael gets to his feet. He leans over and presses his lips to Gavin’s own, kissing him softly. It’s stark contrast to the party. Their kiss that night was messy and quick. It almost means nothing in comparison to this one where Michael gently cups Gavin’s cheek as they lean in. They break away with a smile and stars in their eyes inside of breathless panting.
“Yeah…” Michael says and Gavin glances up in confusion. “I do love you.” He decides with a soft grin. Gavin swells inside. He feels alive and well. He could take on the world with those words.
“I love you too.” Gavin replies and Michael experiences the same feelings. He could touch the sky and come back to earth ten more times before this feeling runs out and if he could then he would.
After a few moments of staring at each other Michael chuckles awkwardly. He scuffs clean trainers on the shining ground, leaving rubber marks on the tiles before smiling.
“What do we do now?” He asks with a laugh.
“I’m sleepy.” Gavin admits. “Turns out getting stabbed with a pole, going through surgery and then declaring love takes it out of you.” He teases. Michael nods and goes to turn away. “Where are you going?” Gavin asks with a frown.
“Thought I’d leave you in peace to sleep…” Michael mumbles but Gavin just shakes his head. Before the Jersey lad knows what’s happening Gavin’s scooted over in his bed, moving wires and tubes to suitable positions. “Careful don’t hurt yourself!” Michael scolds but Gavin ignores
“Stay with me?” He asks for the second time that day. Michael mulls it over for a moment but his mind is quickly made up. He slips off his shoes and his jacket before climbing into the space left for him.
He doesn’t want to hurt Gavin so he decides to lay as still as possible and let Gavin move around him into a comfortable position. The hacker waits until Michael is laying down before he then places his head onto Michael chest comfortably.
Gavin closes his eyes and lets Michael’s heart beat swallow him whole. It’s racing hard and fast again.
“Are you nervous?” Gavin asks quietly and Michael is forced to nod.
“Yes.” He admits. One hand falls into the man’s hair with a smile, turning it around in his fingers so it sticks up at odd angles.
“Why?”
“You make me nervous, Gav…” Michael says with a smile.
“Is that a good thing?” Gavin wonders aloud. He’s already drifting off with the feel of Michael’s hands in his hair and chest moving steadily up and down.
Michael’s grinning from ear to ear and he knows he couldn’t possibly be any happier in this precise moment than with the weight of Gavin on his chest, his voice in his ear. He lets his hand that isn’t busy in the man’s hair take hold of Gavin’s own. Their fingers interlock perfectly and Michael raises their hands to his lips before kissing them gently.
“It’s fucking brilliant.”