Chapter Text
Lieutenant Commander Geordi La Forge had become accustomed to losing sleep over Data.
After tossing in bed for more than an hour, Geordi leaned on one elbow and raised the VISOR to his face. The light was low, stars streaming past his window.
He decided to take a hot water shower. Usually he only had time for the sonic shower in the morning before reporting for duty. That said, these long nights had afforded him perhaps too many opportunities to try to use the shower to relax.
Removing his VISOR again, Geordi stepped into the water, set to a particularly hot setting. Geordi sighed. As the beads of water coursed over his body, his thoughts carried him where the usually did: Data's fingers gently caressing his ribs, his hips, a kiss placed at the nape of Geordi's neck, the android officer's impeccably soft skin sliding up to his back. Geordi moaned and sighed in his private fantasy. Then he hung his head, feeling miserable.
He would try as he always did to push the thoughts from his mind. Data is my friend, as well as my senior officer. It's not right. Show some respect.
But he knew that was too harsh--it was not lack of respect. He had only the highest regard for Data. Indeed, he loved him deeply. Geordi discovered his feelings months ago. Slowly at first, and then undeniably. But who did he think he was to jeopardize their friendship so selfishly? He loathed his own weakness.
Data had given no indication of any inclination of this sort. And why would he? If Geordi asked Data to date him, he might be interested in the experience, but he very well may not be. Geordi cringed to imagine Data struggling to understand, unsure what to do. He might think his trust was betrayed. His self-confidence would falter. It was a terrible position to put him in. Would their friendship recover? Or far, far worse: what if Data agreed to date him just to be... nice? Geordi shuddered.
The only acceptable solution, Geordi decided, was to leave well enough alone and wait for the desire to pass. But time had so far been cruel. Instead of fading, his longing grew.
It was not at all like it was with women, where he didn't know what to do at all. With Data it sometimes took every ounce of discipline that he had just to resist taking his hand, caressing his cheek, confessing his secret to those golden eyes. And yet he resisted; he would clench his jaw, press his hands to his sides if he had to. He would not give in.
And so he allowed himself the only reprieve he had found; alone in the shower, he indulged his imagination. As on other nights like this, he didn't even have to try; he just let the impressions come to him, as vivid anything. Data caressed him from behind, breathing hotly at the top of his spine. Geordi trembled with need. Data would ask, whispering, if he wanted him. Geordi moaned, yes, please. He pleaded, now, hurry. As he imagined his lover filling him, moving deeply inside him, Geordi leaned his forehead on the shower wall and brought himself to the brink of orgasm. Riding his wave of pleasure, he imagined Data's voice moaning his name as he lost control inside him. At that, Geordi arrived.
Rinsing and drying off, a towel around his hips, Geordi felt his self-loathing fall away. He couldn't be so hard on himself. His feelings for Data were sincere, but the potential consequences were very serious. He was only trying to do what was right, without really knowing what was right. He was doing the best that he could, and his heart ached even worse than the need in his groin. He replaced his VISOR on his face. Even in the low light, he could clearly make out the contours of his face reflected in the washroom mirror.
It was 0300 hours. Idly he wondered what Data was doing right now. He wasn't serving gamma shift these days. Was he using his dream program? Running self-diagnostics? Conducting some private research? Purely curious, Geordi asked the question.
"Computer, locate Commander Data."
"Commander Data is in Ten Forward."
Amazed, Geordi replied without thinking. "What is Data doing in Ten Forward at this hour?"
"Commander Data is playing the piano," the computer responded to his request for information.
"Damn it, computer. You really don't know a rhetorical question when you hear one."
"..."
Satisfied with his admonishment of the ship's computer, Geordi turned his attention back to the image in his mind—Data sitting in Ten Forward in the middle of the night, playing the piano by himself. Momentarily, Geordi scolded himself for the assumption that he wouldn't be there with someone. But no, there was no reason for Data to be there with any of the ship's personnel. If he had a date, surely Geordi would have heard about it from his best friend. It wasn't likely, to say the least. If Data was troubled by something, he might seek Guinan's advice, but even Data knew to wait for a more appropriate hour for the majority of the ship's life forms.
Geordi thought of another question and could not resist. "Computer, how long has Data been playing the piano?"
"Commander Data has been playing the piano for two hours, twelve minutes, forty-eight seconds."
"No kidding?"
Only silence. The computer seemed to have taken the hint, Geordi reflected with a smile. Lost in thought, Geordi was now positive that Data was there alone.
The impulse was growing. Why couldn't he just be honest with his friend? He had to have enough faith in their friendship to believe that they could work out any difficulty. Even something like this. Data cared about him, that was true. He had to believe he would take it in the spirit intended, whatever his answer.
My God, I can't really be thinking it.
He needed to tell him the truth, whatever it cost him. He owed him that much.
Do I have the courage to speak to Data, right now?