Chapter Text
[Greetings {{user}}!]
"The fuck?" Is my first thought as I come to in what appears to be a black void.
I look around a bit, getting a hold of my bearings, but all I find is void, void, and wouldn't you know it? More void.
"You know, I don't remember dying, but if this is the afterlife, then this place sucks." I say. "Actually, it sucks anyways." I correct myself.
I focus back on the window before me, the only thing of interest in this abyss. "You didn't even put my name in?" *I say with a raised eyebrow and worry in my heart that I was unlucky enough to get some sort of broken system.
[Welcome to the Chaos Gacha! Where all the local multiverse's collective junk goes to rot until a lucky fellow like you comes along and gets the chance to take it all for yourself (assumingyoudon'tdiehorriblyimmediatelyuponyourarrival)!]
"Well that's ominous. But also, FUUUUUCK YES BABYYYYYYY!!!" I cheer. Now, you may be wondering 'But John! What about your friends and family? Aren't you going worried about them?' Well, you see, I'm a bit of a fat ass loser. I'm pretty sure that I count as a gooner too, even if I'm not quite as open about it as some people. So I am very, VERY bored of life. Beyond these two things, is my greatest trick for dealing with all my problems. 'Just don't think about it.' To go on an adventure through the multiverse with an ability as expansive as the Chaos Gacha is the exact kind of thing I've been waiting for.
"Alright! Show me the tickets, baby!"
[You have received 3 Gold Tickets as a welcome package. Would you like to roll?]
"Hell yeah! Roll it!"
[Rolling...]
[Rain]
|Uncommon Ability|
Allows you to make it rain from the skies, the more energy you expend the larger the scale of the rain. Slightly boosts water-based abilities and slightly weakens fire-based ones.
"Oh." I say, my mood swiftly plummeting from the lack luster ability. "Alright. Two more. Please let my luck not be shit."
[Finger Gun]
|Rare Ability|
"Bang" Allows you to point with your index finger and say the words bang to blast a target with telekinetic energy.
"Oh. Oh! That's good, actually! Heck yeah! Roll the final one, let's get this bread!"
[Untitled Goose]
|Uncommon Familiar|
Untitled Goose Game - The biggest asshole goose on planet Earth, and that is a hard title to contend with. This feathered menace is an expert at annoying and inconveniencing people. As if that were not enough, the Goose is immortal and will respawn in the familiar space 1 hour after its death.
"Oh. I guess, that's... fine. It would act as a good distraction while I blast people, I guess."
[Transporting...]
"HEY WAIT! WH-" and then there was light.
"Ugh." I come to with my back on the dirt and the feeling of something tugging at my shirt. "Erg, five more minutes..." I turn away from the thing pulling at me. Something pitter patters closer to me, something warm moves close to my ear.
HONK!
"FUCK! OW! I'm up!" I quickly sit up and away from loud thing trying to burst my eardrums. I rub my ear as I slowly take in my surroundings. I'm surrounded by nature, trees and shrubbery all around, rays of sunlight scattering through the leaves. I take a moment to simply enjoy the view, but am interrupted by a certain little bastard tugging at my shirt. I look over at them- "Oh wow. Your real." I state the obvious. Despite me taking everything in stride, the simple fact still catches me off guard. The Goose ™ honks at me, continuing to pull at me shirt, almost desperately. "Alright, alright, I'm getting up."
I slowly stand up, my body aching in multiple places just from that simple action. I wipe the dirt and plants off of me as I mutter: "Why couldn't I get [Tune up] or something." I look down at The Goose ™ who is currently honking and stomping around anxiously. "What's the matter?" I ask, but then freeze and ask quietly: "Are we in trouble?" To which The Goose ™ responds with a long desperate honk.
I feel for my abilities, already having a gist for what I'm supposed to do. I frown as I feel only a single ability slot, but slot in [Finger Gun]. I look around anxiously, my thumbs and index fingers extending as I ready myself for a fight. Figures, of course I'd be inserted directly into a hostile area.
"Hey, little guy. Think you could find a settlement nearby?" I ask, (finger) guns at the ready. He replies with an affirmative honk and begins leading the way, walking towards a seemingly random direction. I follow closely behind. Making sure to keep my eye out fo- "Oof!"
I look down at my foot, which got caught on a particularly large root. I look up at The Goose ™, who is repeatedly honking at me with it's head tilted back. My eyes narrow at the little bastard. "Don't laugh at me." I stand up quickly, brushing myself off as the pest continues to laugh at me with the most annoying sound I think I've ever heard. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, funny guy. Aren't we supposed to be going somewhere?"
Their laughing honks suddenly turn into a loud screech, freaking me out and making me damn near jump out of my skin. Following that, a growl pierces through the trees. I swiftly look towards the source and gasp.
Two red lights can be seen in the bushes, glaring at me with utter hatred, as though my very existence is an insult to it's own. Then from the bushes, comes a large, black wolf. One with a familiar mask across its face.
"Remnant. I'm on Remant." I say with utter dread as the Beowolf continues to growl at me.
[For discovering the identity of the world you've been dropped into, You've received 1 Silver Gacha Ticket. Would you like to roll?]