Chapter Text
A drop of sweat fell in my eye. Uncomfortable, even burned a little. I guess I’d just been staring at the blue sky. Right now, the only sky left in the world. The humid days of spring before the summer were just a reminder that I was about to get even worse. Training and fighting were already enough as it was. Now, even at the end of the day in our dorms we couldn’t really cool down. Apparently, Taisha thought that giving us working AC units wasn’t priority enough for them over the past months.
Thus, we endured. Like everything else.
Outside, some fluffy white clouds threatened to block the sun while a darker gray layer pooled up to the east. Even if it rained, there’d be no fields to water, and the reservoirs would simply overflow.
“Whatever…”
I sighed, sluggishly pushing myself out of the chair with the last of my strength after an intense day of training, but the muscles in my thighs burned hot. I was hot, but not… Warmed-up?
If only Hinata was here to hear this joke. Speaking of…
“Come in.”
If it wasn’t for the quietude of living out in the suburbs, I wouldn’t have noticed her steps on the steel flooring outside.
“Wakaba-chan, always so attentive.”
I didn’t do it on purpose expecting a compliment, but I felt proud of myself – enough for a ‘heh’ that I couldn’t tell if she noticed. Hinata being Hinata, I could’ve just as easily said the same thing for her, but the muffled chuckle she hid behind her hand disarmed me more easily than anyone during training.
“It’s so hot in my room,” she continued.
“It is. If this is why you came here, unfortunately I can’t help.”
It was only half a joke – our rooms were always exactly the same temperature, for obvious reasons. At the same time, I was perfectly happy having Hinata’s warm company.
With timid steps, she made her way to my bed, sitting near the edge of the mattress.
“Hm?”
It became pretty obvious that something was up. We were so close to bed time. Why couldn’t the day just… End? I sighed.
“The Taisha asked me to ask you something…”
Whether or not Hinata saw something in me that I couldn’t, I had no reaction to her words – because that it had to do with the Taisha went without saying the second she stepped foot inside my room. And this felt wrong. Why was it that every time Hinata approached me to say something important it had to do with them? Why can’t we just… Be?
I closed my eyes and swallowed the grief, then sat close beside her. It was still hot, which didn’t occur to me until I’d done it.
Her eyes wandered over me, stopping on my hands, making me realize I was fiddling. I forced myself to stop doing that, and she laughed, before her bright smile clouded in the weight of whatever it was going to be this time.
“You are to deliver a speech live tonight. They say the script will be ready once you arrive.”
“I…” I can’t believe it. I’m tired. I’m not ready. I don’t want to.
… But I must.
“I wish I could be up there, holding your hand, Wakaba-chan. But since I can’t, expect to see me rooting for you behind the cameras!”
My plans of having a long bath had just been slashed and replaced by administrative work of sorts. Or I guess more appropriately: acting work – dressing up in Shinjuu-sama’s divinity to deliver earthly messages, since apparently that was part of being a hero.
“Do you think…”
The Taisha did say they needed time before revealing the “tragic loss” of two heroes to the world. Seven days passed.
“M-hm,” Hinata nodded and grabbed my hand. My breathing hitched at first, and then I relaxed. Just how long had I been tense for? “But we don’t have to go now, Wakaba-chan. You look tired. You’re always pushing yourself too hard…”
“I’m the leader. I have to train more than everyone else combined. Right?”
That wasn’t meant as a joke, but she chuckled for some reason.
The clock on my desk let me know that we had 40 minutes at most before I had to go and rush for a shower.
“Why don’t you lay your head on my lap for a while? I’ll wake you up when it’s time to go.”
Not a thought passed through my head, and before I knew it my cheeks pressed against her thighs. For a captain, I was weirdly fast to follow orders. At least when it came from the right place.
My cheek instantly stuck to her thigh, glued by sweat. It was truly an uncomfortable situation all around, but… Comforting?
To make matters worse, her fingers found my hair, and the touch made my scalp all tingly. I almost felt like I should protest, or be embarrassed. But the truth was, if Hinata was my enemy, I would’ve been long gone.
But was I allowed to be this comfortable? To receive this kind of attention? Just a week ago I witnessed two of my best friends die! And what’s worse, I was there and couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t lead them to a safe position, I couldn’t intervene, nothing.
So, am I truly deserving of any of this?
“Wakaba-chan?”
The way she called for my name carved a hole in my stomach and it startled me in ways that the Vertexes never had. It felt like falling face-first back onto the ground.
She brushed a finger over my cheek, and I pressed my eyes shut even more, feeling a warm tear trace from the corner of my eye to her leg.
“Hinata…”
I buried my face on her shirt like a scared child trying to hide the ugly sobbing despite knowing full well that I didn’t need to hide anything from her. But that’s how I chose to spend my time, the outside world put on hold. The last thing I remembered was how the tears, the air, the whole world evaporated in a hot haze.
***
I moved around a little, but there wasn’t much space to begin with, and my neck hurt pretty badly. Still with my eyes closed, the daily training I’d done earlier flashed in front of my eyes, but there was no way I’d injured myself like that – I had the experience and knew better than that.
“Welcome back.”
Of course. I just slept like this – but for how long? That’s when I remembered that we were supposed to be getting ready for a live stream from the Taisha headquarters.
“I’ll be late…”
I jumped onto my feet and almost lost my balance. It was too easy to blame it on the nap, but what if I was getting slower and weaker? No, that couldn’t be it – not when Shikoku had just lost such an important part of its defense line.
For some reason, Hinata remained on the bed observing me.
“Hm?”
“It’s rare for you to be this exhausted, you know? This will be a first for my collection, hehe.”
She proudly showed off her phone screen to me, and slowly the puzzle clicked in place.
“You…!”
This room was truly too hot today.
“Do you think we could sell these photos as some sort of hero album once we’ve dealt with the enemy?”
“We’re doing that?”
I’d always thought that it was only for her personal collection, so maybe I’d have to start being more careful from now on.
“No. But isn’t that a good idea?”
Coming to think of it, I didn’t know what I’d do after the fight was over – after we pushed the Vertexes away and reclaimed the land from the gods. It was true that society worked on a money basis and once the Taisha stopped providing, then we’d need income… But the whole “society” still felt a little too out of reach, and my head hurt just from thinking about it.
But a photobook? Was this really the best strategy?
I pondered with my hand on my chin when I noticed Hinata holding back a laugh.
“What?”
“Nothing.” Suspicious. “Either way, you should go get ready, Wakaba-chan! We don’t want to be late or the priests won’t give us peace!”
“Yes, you’re right.”
***
Due to circumstance, today I came to give my speech alone while Hinata watched me from behind the cameras, just like she said she’d do.
After changing into my hero outfit, I quickly made my way through the wooden corridors – I’d gotten to know it better than I remembered the home I grew up in. Priests bowed, sticking to the side, out of the way. In front of me, a tall man stood with a scroll in his hand.
“Nogi-sama, please take today’s speech.”
He too bowed, though he still remained at a higher eye level. A tall man like him and at an old age (judging by the voice) probably couldn’t go any lower without hurting himself. Because as far as physical aptitude went, only heroes needed to be in top condition in this new world.
I took the paper into my hands, feeling it drag against my gloves. A hero’s speech that the leader should deliver to the public.
The chatter was easy to hear already, and only got louder and more pressing with each step, until eventually the burnt orange sky replaced the wooden ceiling, and everyone went “oh! There she is!” like usual.
I tightened my fingers around Ikutachi’s hilt and took a deep breath before stepping out as Nogi Wakaba. Up on the makeshift platform, cameras flashed in my face before I’d even said a single word, and everyone held their breaths like this was the most important announcement of a lifetime, to where even the plank creaking under my weight was heard.
People were clearly scared – everyone was. But I just wished that such “important announcements” had more positive words inked on it.
I cleared my throat.
“It has been four years since this heavenly tragedy started. People’s lives, our country, and the freedom of being able to look up at the sky with hope.”
Not unlike what I did earlier.
“Since that day, many things have been robbed from us. Now, humanity once again finds itself in a dire situation. The enemy has become even stronger, and two heroes have lost their lives in battle.”
Tamako. Anzu. The image of that sickening creature attacking the two of them at once flashed in front of me together with a camera, and anger wanted to come out of my chest. Not here, not now. But one day, without a doubt…
I banished the thought by hitting the end of Ikutachi on the floor.
“However! We have not yet lost! The peace that they took away… We will unquestionably reclaim it, and give back a time when everyone can spend their days with family and friends!”
Those who were still here with us, still bound by this duty, together.
“The Taisha and us are working on counter-measures! We will turn the tides of this war in no time! Us heroes will continue fighting. But this is not some special thing. I can say this because I know! I know that if a child is attacked by an enemy, their parents will fight for them with their lives. I know that if a child gets involved in an accident right in front of our eyes, we would overcome any amount of fear and hurry to help them!”
I’d scrunched the script into a ball in my hands, but I didn’t need it anymore. The path ahead was clear enough: no soldier can afford to stop and look back. It’s part of their leader’s responsibility to make sure this is the case, to keep pushing forward – if anything, harder than everyone else. To make sure everyone goes home safely, and only then grief the friends fallen in combat. This was how fate had us, the heroes, and this was how I should live my life. Not to defeat the enemy that I hate, but to protect those that I love.
Raising a fist to the sky, I continued.
“The courage to face the enemy! The courage to help our comrades! The courage not to forget the pain! The courage to continue fighting! Every single person in Shikoku right now is a hero that possesses this courage! And we will not lose to the enemy! Let’s continue fighting back! For a future where we retake from the invaders everything that once belonged to us!!!”
Ikutachi pierced the sky as I held it high, its sheen momentarily blinding me, and my head almost spun when I looked up. Exhaustion took over, and I remembered to breathe at the same time that I heard all the camera shutters and some clapping layered underneath it.
In this moment I felt powerful. I could face anyone – or anything – and accomplish what I’d set out to do. And I let the world know that this was a promise, and so now one that I couldn’t back out of.
So this was it, and today’s speech was done. I bowed and made my exit, exchanging glances with Hinata briefly. She was always here for me, every announcement and interview. I wished I could say the same for Yuuna, however…
“Nogi-sama, another great day of–”
“We’re going to the hospital.”
“Y-yes, of course. I’ll call the driver.”
At last, they left me alone. I walked straight out of the place without talking to anyone else, and they just let me. After the Taisha was founded and Shinjuu-sama started delivering messages through the mikos, I was put in a weird position of power. It never felt right giving orders to people older than me, and to be honest I didn’t really understand why that was the case.
Much more importantly, I was starving! It never occurred to me until now that I didn’t eat dinner between training and coming here. And now that I completed the task they gave me…
Hinata waited for me in front of the door, her silhouette darkened against the bright exterior, but I’d seen her pose one thousand times before: hands in front, slightly tilted head. If I had to bet my dinner, I’d also say a soft smile that made me feel looked out for even when I was inside Shinjuu-sama’s barrier without her. That’s how confident I was – I definitely didn’t want to miss dinner right now.
The moment I turned to the restroom, two women wearing Taisha’s traditional garment hurried out, and only someone I didn’t know remained, her formal attire sticking out given the place. It was slightly awkward, and we remained in silence, trying not to make eye contact.
My empty stomach was a priority, right after Yuuna. When was the last time I ate Kagawa udon? Maybe I could get fried chicken, or Western…
I stopped to wash my face when I saw myself in the mirror. I couldn’t pretend I didn’t notice myself. Not at times like this. I saw a hero with my face, my hair, but it might as well have been the mirror of a fitting room where I was trying out a “hero” cosplay for the first time. It was so rare for me to see myself dressed up like this, so casually, too.
Wait a minute… What was I even doing now?
I rinsed my face, the cold water being a welcome surprise I didn’t know I needed, and rushed out of there. We had a dear friend to visit, this wasn’t the time to meander.