Chapter Text
Todoroki Touya was many things, a bit of a bitch, probably unnecessarily dramatic, bad son was questionable depending on what his father had done as his reaction could actually be warranted, anyway, point was he had done nothing to deserve this great tragedy that had befallen him.
“Shut up,” Tomura said, perusing the craft beer selection. “It’s really not that big of a deal.”
Touya huffed, folding his arms, glaring at said craft beer selection like it had personally slapped him across the face. “It’s a big deal to me.”
Tomura made a dismissive noise before picking up two different cans of beer and reading their ingredients. “Maybe you should get up and get over it then.”
“What if I go home for the holidays and I’m the only one who’s single?” Touya grabbed one of the beers and put it back on the shelf, knowing Tomura would hate it. “I can’t be the only virgin in the household, that’s embarrassing. I did the whole big coming out thing at fifteen like an idiot because what did I do with my open and honest gayness? Nothing. I am twenty four, Shigs-”
Tomura picked up a four pack of the chosen beer. “Wait, isn’t your brother like sixteen? Do sixteen-year-olds do that?”
“I think that’s the most ace thing you’ve ever said to me.”
“It’s not my fault the allosexual I live with is a loser with no bitches, you’ve given me a skewed perception of normalcy.”
Touya groaned and followed after Tomura, grabbing a bottle of rum on the way. “That’s what I’ve been saying, I need to do something about it, like get on a dating app or something.”
Tomura made a complicated face, before leading them to the confectionery aisle.
“Why did you make that face?”
“What face?”
Touya stepped on the back of his shoe and Tomura slumped like a puppet with cut strings.
“You’d be terrible on a dating app.”
Touya gasped, ignoring the crisps he’d been looking at to stare at his supposed friend. “Rude.”
“I mean it, you’d be really picky and insufferable.”
Touya pouted, picking up the same flavour of crisps he always gets because he can’t seem to do anything different. “I’m not that picky.”
Tomura levelled him with a look. “Go fucking get toilet paper and stop pissing me off.”
Touya flipped him off over his shoulder, while pulling out his phone and pressing on his sister’s name.
“Yumi,” he said, holding down the record button. “Hypothetically, if someone I knew was vaguely curious, how exactly did you meet your girlfriend? For research purposes. A normal brother-sister bonding question.”
He snatched some toilet paper off the shelf and headed back towards Tomura who was better at picking snacks for the League anyway. Somehow he could always guess what jellies Jin wanted even though he fucking changes his mind every week.
His phone vibrated in his hand and Touya scrambled with the toilet paper and the rum like some desperate sad little man.
I met her through friends.
Thanks for the totally normal brother-sister bonding, big bro.
“What the fuck does through friends mean? Also fuck you, this is normal, we’re having a normal conversation.”
Touya brandished the toilet paper at Tomura who looked more reasonable, standing there with a basket filled with shopping.
It means we have the same friends and they introduced us.
What is this some Touya Crisis about being single?
“It’s not a crisis,” Touya said heatedly, leading Tomura to haul the hand holding the phone towards him and saying “yes, it is.”
Touya snatched his hand back, belatedly seeing the voice message already sent and sighed. “You don’t even know who that was. What if it was like my bank?”
Tomura raised an eyebrow at him. “You send voice messages to your bank?”
“It’s a modern world, Shigs, keep up, fuck.” Touya picked up some chocolate for himself because the world was cruel to only him. “It’s not a crisis, it’s like a thought experiment, of what if I die alone and my cat eats my face?”
“You don’t have a cat.”
Touya groaned emphatically. “That’s not the point. The point… The point is I would like a partner who would fall to his knees when he sees my corpse and like cries and never remarries because I was the love of his life, is that too much to ask?”
“You’d get married?” Tomura said, starting to scan the snacks in the self-checkout. “You? The poster child of divorce?”
Touya threw his crisps at Tomura’s chest, who just caught it and scanned it. “Just because my parents got divorced way later than they should have does not mean I don’t believe in marriage. I just think most people shouldn’t get married because it will end terribly, but I deserve it because then I can put my husband down as my like ‘who decides whether I stay on life support guy’.”
Tomura took Touya’s chocolate out of his hand and scanned it. “Who’s that right now? Your dad?”
Touya blanched. “Oh I should check that, how do I check that?”
“He’d keep you on life support forever, you’d be like a weird breathing corpse.”
“Why would you say this to me? I’m already having a crisis.”
Tomura snorted, scanning the alcohol. “So it is a crisis?”
“Fine, whatever, I feel not only unlovable, but also unfuckable. Happy?”
One of the cashiers gave them an awkward lip closed smile before tapping the screen to say they were of age.
“Fucking thrilled,” Tomura muttered, shoving the beer and rum at Touya and picking up the shopping bag he’d packed.
Touya frowned and looked at his phone again, hoping for a shred of sympathy.
Wait is this because Shouto is asking Izuku to go to that school dance with him?
Touya.
No.
TOUYAAA.
Can you stop competing with our child sibling pls <3
“I never said I was competing with Shouto!” Touya snarled down the phone, sending Tomura into a fit of laughter.
* * *
“This is a terrible film,” Touya said. “My eyes are glazing over, I think I can see the light.”
“Shut up,” Shuichi said, throwing popcorn at Touya’s face. “You were outvoted, superhero film won.”
“Can I not point out the travesty that that is?” Touya complained, picking up the thrown popcorn from his lap and eating it. “The fight scenes are all CGI, where’s the pizazz?”
“Maybe you sucked it into your black hole of negativity,” Magne said, patting Touya condescendingly on the shoulder.
“I wish he was sucking something,” Tomura muttered, “then he’d shut the fuck up.”
Jin gasped, covering Himiko’s ears. “In front of the child? You horndog.”
“Your quest for love still escaping you, Touya?” Atsuhiro asked.
“Yeah, kinda,” Touya murmured, sinking into his seat a little.
Himiko uncovered her ears and smirked like a bloodhound who got a whiff of an injured deer. “Touya! You should let us help!”
“No,” Touya said instantly, “I would rather shit in my hands and clap.”
“You’re very fixated on this,” Kurogiri said, “has something happened recently?”
“Shouto’s got a boyfriend,” Tomura said.
“That’s got nothing to do with anything,” Touya said viciously.
Himiko gasped excitedly. “He’s going to ask Izuku to the dance! Isn’t that nice?”
“Are you going to this dance with anyone, young Himiko?” Atsuhiro asked.
Himiko flushed a little, giggling. “I was thinking of asking someone, but I don’t know if she’d say yes.”
Magne smiled down at her. She had started fostering Himiko a year ago, after her parents had reacted badly to finding out she was trans. The League had all accepted her as their little sibling pretty quickly, it had been nice, watching her grow into herself.
Not that Touya would ever say it, because that would be like, affectionate or whatever.
“You should,” Shuichi said, “then you won’t end up like Touya.”
“I’m a delight, thank you,” Touya snarled.
“But you are single,” Himiko mused, twirling a hair around her finger in thought.
Touya groaned dramatically, appreciating the little head pat Magne gave him in response.
Despite the fact that they are evil bitches who bully him, he did like his friends. He could sit there in silence for a while and the conversation would still flow around him, always open for inclusion but not expecting anything.
That was the thing with his siblings, as much as he cared about them, silence freaked them out. He and Shouto were both constantly asked if they were alright. They were similar that way, in a lot of ways, actually. The little fucker is even gaying better than him.
It wasn’t that he wanted to compete with Shouto, he knew logically that he was a sixteen-year-old and even though their father pitted them against each other all the time didn’t mean that Touya should continue that. It was just something in him that got scared every time Shouto hit a milestone, like as the older sibling, Touya should’ve hit it first, and then Shouto also always managed to do it better.
Touya equals failure, even in his own stupid brain.
There was also the other thing.
The soulmate thing.
The one or whatever.
Your person.
That thing.
Touya sighed deeply. His soulmate mark was probably part of the reason he was so picky, all because of pretty red feathers painted in purposeful sharp strokes on the back of his left shoulder.
Supposedly when you met the one or built up some kind of connection, your mark would move.
Touya had seen it with Tomura and Shuichi. One day they were just sitting around, playing video games, and suddenly Tomura's little lizard was running up and down his arms and Shuichi's cute dust mites with big red eyes were hopping about around his neck. And Touya, in a moment of great humility, did not throw a temper tantrum.
His parents weren't soulmates, maybe that's what cemented the thought in his mind, if he didn't want to be his parents - if he didn't want to be his father - then surely he'd be safe with the boy who owned his red feathers.
Soulmates were a funny thing though, as much as every kid dreamed of them being your lifelong lover, most of the time that wasn't the case. It could be family and friends, someone who will be there for you when you need it most and will do their utmost to love and guide you.
Fuyumi and Natsuo got each other. Snowflakes dusting Fuyumi's cheeks and ice crystals running up Natsuo's right side.
It made sense. It's not like anyone else in the family gave a shit about them.
Touya was trying to fix it now, too many years past their childhood to undo all the damage, but Fuyumi and Natsuo were understanding people who forgave both him and Shouto for their respective isolation and weirdness. Being daddy's legacy gave a kid notions, and being dropped as the legacy gave a kid issues.
Issues that were on his skin as burns as permanent as his soulmark.
Touya had always been a touch delusional, he thought he could win back his father's favour, have his mother meet his eyes, and beat Shouto at every milestone. So maybe, he could have someone in all the ways you could possibly have someone.
Sometimes though, on nights like this one, surrounded by his friends, all laughing and comfortable, he could let some of the delusion go, and be grateful.
He rested his head against the back of the couch, yet again bemoaning heroes until Shuichi started his rant about what heroism truly means, with interjections from Tomura, Magne and Atsuhiro, a small smile threatening to peek out on his face.
* * *
The Todoroki kids all had the urge to help practically crawling out of them, and nothing showcased it more than their careers. Fuyumi the teacher, Natsuo the future doctor, Shouto who wanted to become a barrister (not take over the law firm fuck you Enji), and Touya, one of the full time paid staff at an animal rescue centre.
“Hi,” Touya said, rubbing the head of a parrot, who was trying his very best to get both scratches and get Touya’s finger in his mouth.
“Hello!” the parrot sang back, Touya’s finger successfully trapped in his mouth.
“Do you promise not to try and fly out after me?” Touya said, prying the bird's beak off him. “I gave you food, eat it instead of yearning for freedom.”
The parrot let out a series of chirps before decreeing; “no, no.”
Touya raised an eyebrow. “No to food or no to escaping?”
The bird preened the underside of his wing before popping his head back up. “No.”
“Playing your cards close to your chest today,” Touya said, “I'm suspicious of you, Fredrik.”
Fredrik cocked his head before singing a little tune.
“You won't lure me into a false sense of security,” Touya said firmly, “who was the one who caught you in the net last time?”
“Friend!”
Touya pointed a finger at him which Fredrik instantly tried to grab with his beak again. “That was very touching but I still don't trust you.”
“Friend! Hello friend!”
It was at this point Touya realised that more people had entered the bird cage, the other two parrots squawking as the door opened.
Touya snatched Fredrik before he took flight, who did nothing except let out a mournful “noooo.”
“Ah Touya-san,” his boss Giran said, an unlit cigarette in his mouth. “This is Takami Keigo, he's the new vet ‘round here.”
Touya nodded politely to the newcomer. “What happened to Kaina?”
“Says she'll only do the normal animals now, no fancy shit. That's what this guy's for.”
Takami was holding out a hand to one of the parrots, who hopped down onto it, chirping at him in curiosity. “I like exotics, Tsutsumi-sensei says she hired me so she never has to fuck with snakes again.” The parrot hopped up onto his shoulder, nipping at his shiny earrings. “Giran-san said you wanted a vet to have a look at one of these guys?”
Touya held up Fredrik who chirped sadly. “We've got a home for this little prick, just want to make sure he's alright before we send him off.”
“Hey little guy,” Takami said, taking his stethoscope off his neck and sticking it in his ears. It was an obnoxious bright red thing that matched his earrings. “Do you mind keeping a hold on him?”
Fredrik cheeped miserably, still trapped in Touya’s hands.
“Yeah sure.”
Touya found himself studying Takami as he listened to Fredrik’s heart and lungs. His eyes were a golden colour that popped out quite dramatically because of the black lining around them. He had a dusting of freckles across his nose, a ridiculous goatee, windswept blond hair.
“Are you around him often? Can I ask some questions?”
Touya shrugged one shoulder. “Sure.”
“You notice anything different, still eating, drinking, no change in activity levels?”
“Yeah he’s grand,” Touya said, “he’s not lethargic or anything.”
“Cool.” Takami dropped his stethoscope back around his neck lazily. He took Fredrik’s head in his hands carefully, examining his beak, eyes and ears. “Has he eaten already today?”
“Nope, just brought the food in there.”
Takami felt down the parrot’s neck. “Nice, and his faeces is normal?”
“Yeah as far as I know.”
“Is he okay if I look at his wings and feet?”
“He’ll be alright with the feet, if I let go of his wings he’ll make a break for it.”
Takami snorted, feeling down Fredrik’s legs. “Fair enough, I’ll have a look at him for a few minutes if you don’t mind letting him go, but I think he’s pretty good. His feathers seem healthy, he’s hydrated, there’s no discharge or anything around his eyes or nares. All in all, I’d say he’s good to go.”
Fredrik hopped instantly away from Touya as soon as he placed him down on his branch. “Friend!”
“It was nice meeting you too, birdie,” Takami said, scratching Fredrik’s head, who didn’t even attempt to nip him the little fucker.
Fredrik chirped a farewell before flying off to his food.
Touya stared curiously at Takami, all wrapped up in a ridiculous fleece slowly coming down his elbows and cargo trousers. “Damn, Kaina usually just wiggles her stethoscope around and says they’re fine.”
Takami laughed. “Yeah I think she was starting to feel bad, I’m more used to birds and reptiles. Focused in on them a bit more in college. They hide pain pretty well, if you don’t know what to look for you won’t see it.”
A knot Touya didn’t know was sitting in his chest eased. Kaina was chill and did have years of experience but there had been a few times where he had to be pretty firm about how he knew something was wrong. Hopefully this Takami guy wasn’t too up his own ass to listen to Touya, but at least he should know when something was off.
Fredrik hopped merrily around in a circle flapping his wings. “Tasty!”
Takami smiled softly down at him and Touya was brutally reminded that he was, in fact, incredibly gay.
* * *
Takami Keigo had wanted to be a vet for as long as he could remember.
He’d flitted around a few ideas, firefighter, paramedic, but the vet thing had always stuck with him. So much so that he applied, got accepted and got an academic scholarship into college.
He blames it on the birds that used to hang around his childhood home.
They were mostly crows, little black birds that cawed and shrieked, and little Keigo had adored them. He would sit under the shade of the rickety old porch, just out of view of any strange passersby, and watch them.
It was better than sitting in the sitting room with his mother, high out of her mind, or worse, in a deep depression, staring at the TV, waiting for his father to return.
He couldn’t watch the birds when his father was home. He wasn’t allowed outside. Or look out the window. But he could still hear them, it made everything less lonely.
Never less frightening, but that couldn’t be helped.
He was currently ignoring the buzzing in his pocket, part of him feeling guilty, the other part feeling a vicious victory. He could now afford to ignore his mother the way she’d always ignored him.
She rang him often enough, maybe three to four times a week, Keigo would feel guilty enough to answer maybe once a fortnight. Sometimes he would catch her on a good day, when she wanted to know him, most of the time she would be angry or crying.
You have money now, why won’t you help us?
Us. His father may be in prison but he’d somehow won his mother’s loyalty for life.
He had only rang him once. Said it was Keigo’s duty to look after his parents. Said he owed it to them. Keigo hadn’t spoken the whole call, the silence in his father’s presence still trained into him, it wouldn’t have made a difference anyway.
He’d gotten a good, steady career that made him fulfilled. It was more than a teenage Keigo could’ve dreamed of, still sitting on the porch, watching the birds, books and notes surrounding him. Filled with determination to at least try. Try to make something of himself, try hard enough that at least that could comfort him if he becomes his parents, that he had made the effort to break a cycle that spun and spun like the earth around the sun.
His soulmark wasn’t something he had thought much about until recently.
Bright vibrant blue flames curled around his left shoulder blade, snaking across a bit of his ribs and the top of his shoulder, tickling the start of his neck.
Keigo had always thought they were beautiful, but that was where his interest stopped, he had too much to fight to think about something as ridiculous as a lover, a friend, a family. He fought every battle alone, that was his burden to bear.
But now that he had a job, a roof over his head, a full stomach, the freedom to be as loud and visible as he wants to be, the blue flames have become more enticing.
He’d made friends in college, real friends, but no one who made his flames dance.
He sat out on the balcony of his apartment, shirt off, chest bound with tape, watching the birds flit around the skies of Musutafu.
He traced a hand over his flames, wondering if he was safe enough now to begin to long for someone who could love him, if he could even imagine being someone’s first priority.
* * *
The next time Touya saw Takami Keigo was two weeks later.
Admittedly, he figured that he would see him again in a work context, with animals around to distract him from his sharp golden gaze.
So, Touya did the most reasonable thing he could think of, and leapt over the bar top and crouched beside the bartender.
“Touya,” Kurogiri said, looking down at him with a raised eyebrow. “I didn’t realise you wanted to become one with the soju.”
Touya blinked at the fridge beside him, indeed filled with different flavours of soju. “It’s been a lifelong passion of mine, Kurogiri-san.”
“I’m so sorry,” Tomura sighed from his rightful place on the customer side of the bar. “I don’t even know why he’s doing this.”
“Shut up, Shigs,” Touya hissed, popping his head up briefly. “I am hiding. From pretty boys.”
Tomura blinked down at him, thoroughly baffled. “Why?”
“I know him,” Touya said seriously, or as seriously as he can with rum in his system. He swayed slightly, pointing a finger in Tomura’s face. “From work. I cannot let him see me. He’s pretty and I can’t be trusted to not be stupid and then I have to see him again.”
“You’re always fucking stupid,” Tomura said, wrinkling his nose at him.
“I meant in a gay way, Shigs.”
“What does that even mean?”
“It means,” Touya said hotly, standing up again. “I will embarrass myself in front of him and then I can never live with the shame and all the animals in my care will die because I can’t see the vet again after I tell him I think he’s a work of art that sprung from the page because paint could not contain his beauty.”
Kurogiri whistled. “That is a lot.”
“Touya’s a lot,” Tomura pointed out.
“He can’t know I’m a lot,” Touya bemoaned, sinking into a crouch again.
“Wait, which guy even is he?” Tomura asked, eyes scanning the crowd.
Touya groaned, burying his head in his hands. “The pretty one, obviously.”
“He’s got blond hair,” Kurogiri said, “red shirt, over by the dance floor.”
“Oh, the one Jin’s talking to?”
Touya jumped back up onto his feet. “Oh no.”
Jin was indeed talking to Takami Keigo, who looked even more pretty in the stupidly well-fitting red shirt and black jeans. Takami was laughing at something Jin said, and Touya felt something like despair twist in his chest.
“You look like a fucking kicked puppy,” Tomura said.
“It’s fine, I can make it through their wedding,” Touya said stoically, “Jin is a good friend, he deserves to be happy-”
“Oh god, please get back under the bar.”
“-and really who would I be to stand in the way of happiness? I can not be an asshole for like a few hours, it’s so doable-”
All of a sudden, Jin pointed over in their direction, before waving excitedly at them. Takami turned his head, making his dangly golden earring catch the light and oh no Touya should’ve stayed under the bar.
“I’m too drunk to be normal,” Touya said desperately, as he watched Takami cock his head like a bird as he looked at him. “Tomura, please, kill me.”
“Oh wow, he recognises you too,” Tomura said, laughing slightly, “you’re so fucked.”
Kurogiri poured out another glass of rum and coke and shoved it in front of Touya, who grasped it like a dying man.
“Why are they coming over?” Touya said, all of the saliva in his mouth drying out at once. He gulped down some of his drink. “Surely they can stay over there. Away from me.”
“Touya!” Jin cried out.
“Kill me, please,” Touya begged a resolute Tomura.
Takami Keigo smiled at him when they reached them and Touya wanted to die. To be fair, it wasn't the soft smile he'd given to the parrot weeks ago, that would have been a catastrophe, but it was a polite customer service kind of smile. The kind that said ‘I am here to have some small talk and then leave’ not the kind that was prepared for a tipsy Touya and whatever his dumb mouth was about to say.
“Takami, right?” Touya said, aiming for being confident and aloof and ending up dropping honorifics altogether.
Takami, though, didn't seem all that bothered. “Ah, just Keigo is fine, unless you're hiding another parrot behind the bar?”
“Fuck Touya, please tell me you didn't bring a bird,” Tomura said, wincing.
Touya turned on him, outraged. “That was one time and it was a snake.”
“To the bar?” Keigo said.
Jin laughed. “No! To our friend Magne’s house! Terrible place.”
“I had to watch him,” Touya said resolutely, “and I take my job very seriously, he was in no danger-”
“He escaped,” Tomura said flatly, “and scared the shit out of Magne’s ex when she went into the bathroom and found a massive python on the toilet.”
“Good riddance if you ask me,” Jin said, “I never liked her. She was the best!”
“But the snake,” Touya said, pointing at Keigo firmly, “was completely fine. I am very capable in my profession.”
Keigo laughed a little and Touya felt blood rush to his face that could be alcohol related as long as he gaslit himself enough.
“Have some dignity,” Tomura muttered, “you're practically draped over the bar.”
Touya may have been leaning over a suspicious amount and may or may not have moved his hand towards his hair to fiddle with it, but there was no need to point out his wretched desperation. “Um.”
“Can I ask,” Keigo said, his smile curving up into something slightly vicious. “Why are you behind the bar, Touya?”
That was the moment for Touya to say something witty or interesting or anything other than-
“Oh. I- well. That's- a loaded question. There are answers. Somewhere.”
Tomura groaned and dragged a hand down his face.
Jin blinked at him as if he was just realising that Touya was not where he was supposed to be. “Are you bartending? Wow your job isn't paying you enough huh?”
An out, if Touya was smart enough to take it. Unfortunately Keigo had said his name and was looking suspiciously like he was thinking of making fun of him and Touya’s brain was short circuiting so much sparks could've appeared.
“Uh. No. I just- there was- I like it here.” Touya nodded to himself before stroking the bartop with a finger. “It's, uh, got a good view.”
“Does it?” Keigo said, grinning at him. “And here I was thinking I had a great view from here.”
Touya opened and closed his mouth like an idiot, flush prominent on his cheeks. “Oh, that's- thank you. You look very nice, um, also. Yes. Uh- that was weird sorry. You're just really good-looking and I'm gay and have eyes and fuck wait that was weirder-”
“And suddenly,” Tomura drawled, “the being single at twenty-four makes so much sense.”
“-I can go back to hiding under the bar,” Touya blurted out.
Keigo raised his eyebrows, an evil little smile on his face. “Hiding, huh?”
Touya sank down until only his hair - and his hands with their white knuckled grip - were visible over the bar. “Any chance I could convince you to forget all of this?”
Keigo tapped a finger along Touya’s hand. “I don't know, I'm rather enjoying this.”
Touya popped his head up to glare at him. “You're making fun of me.”
“Have been this entire time, hot stuff,” Keigo smirked, finger still tracing along Touya's hand. “You get so flustered.”
Touya groaned, letting his forehead drop onto the bar. “I will be sober next time I see you. I'm never fucking drinking again.”
Keigo laughed and Touya groaned.
Jin threw an arm around Keigo's shoulders. “I have a good feeling about you, Keigo. You piece of shit. You're new around here, yeah? Let us know if you need anything.”
Keigo straightened, fingers pulling away from Touya’s hand. “Oh, that's- thanks, Jin.”
Tomura snorted. “You make Touya stupid and he's always pissing me off, you should be around more often.”
Touya pouted. “I. Am. Being. Bullied.”
But Keigo’s smile was genuine, so maybe it was worth it.
* * *
“Noooo Keigo whyyyy,” Touya bemoaned, practically draped over the kitchen counter.
Keigo found himself grinning slightly, still cutting the salmon into strips. “What great tragedy has befallen you this time, Touya?”
It had been a few months since Keigo had been aggressively adopted (as Rumi had fondly put it) by Jin's friend group. Jin was super chill and he and Keigo had gotten on from the get-go, but the rest of the League had taken a bit of work.
Once Tomura and Shuichi found out he had never played any video games before, they'd made it their personal mission to teach him everything they knew which included bi-weekly calls where they played online games together. (Keigo had even bought a computer to replace his old college laptop.)
He and Atsuhiro had good natured debates about medicine, where Atsuhiro would argue on behalf of human medicine and Keigo would rip his career choice apart. (“You only treat one species that's so embarrassing.” Touya had laughed so hard that rum had come out of his nose.)
Kurogiri had adopted two kittens and was religiously ringing him for advice. (“She's yawned twice in a row, is that normal?” “Your kitten is dying, Kurogiri-san.” “...really?” “No you're both tired, go to sleep.”) In return Kurogiri was teaching him how to actually cook instead of just making noodles. Now Keigo meal prepped like a real adult.
Magne and Himiko were special to him, as he had never had trans friends before. He could just talk without explaining anything, and without any fear. Himiko had adored him almost as instantly as Jin had, and excitedly chatted his ear off about anything she could think of. Magne had a soft spot for him too, and helped him out whenever she could, including introducing him to a better, more trans-friendly doctor and pharmacist.
Touya was different.
Keigo couldn't exactly explain why, even when he turned it over in the privacy of his own mind he couldn't quite get it. Touya was dramatic and loud, with a sharp laugh, pretty blue eyes, and skin mottled in burn scars all over his hands, arms, and parts of his face. He was someone Keigo liked being around, he could be chatty and demanding of attention and he could also be quiet and contemplative.
If Keigo was being brutally honest, Touya was his favourite. He was a man built out of contradictions and hypocrisies and Keigo wanted to untangle every part of him, not to put him back together any differently, but just so he could see it all.
Rumi had said he talks about Touya the most. But she could be biased considering she was dating his sister and Fuyumi was definitely asking about Touya, so Rumi was probably locking in more when he was mentioned. It didn't mean anything.
“You're making fish first of all, icky.” Touya chewed his lip for a second before continuing. “And I'm getting promoted.”
Keigo dropped his knife, spinning around to face Touya properly. “Wait, shit, really?”
“I'm sorry to tell you this, but you have been cutting salmon this whole time-”
Keigo grabbed Touya’s wrists, leaning against the counter to watch Touya’s face. “Hey.”
“You're getting fish smell on me,” Touya pouted and Keigo laughed softly.
“You deserve it, you know.”
“The fish smell?”
Keigo squeezed his wrists. “And the promotion.”
Touya traced a finger gently along Keigo’s arm. “I'm going to be in charge of a whole section of the shelter.”
“The exotics,” Keigo said instantly, excitement seeping into his voice.
“There's a lot to fuck up,” Touya said, staring down at his hands. “I don't think I'm qualified, you know?”
“Bullshit.” Keigo moved his hands to cover Touya’s own. “You should've gotten this position years ago. You know so much about the animals in your care, hell Touya, you've basically been running the exotics section already, now you have the title to prove it.”
Touya wrinkled his nose. “That's what Giran said.”
“I may have, uh, ripped him a new asshole about you. Politely, obviously.”
Touya stared at him, dumbfounded.
Keigo fidgeted nervously with the collar of his shirt, one hand still covering Touya’s. “I just mentioned that I was always interacting with you about anything to do with the animals, how much you know, how everyone always defers to you, how you're incredibly passionate and dedicated and that I'm never worried about any animal who needs support because I know you'll be there-”
“Keigo,” Touya breathed, a flush bursting across his face. “That's- you really think- I mean- you-”
Keigo had the fleeting thought that Touya was always so pretty when he was flustered, it was kind of insane that he didn't have a boyfriend already.
“I mean it,” Keigo said, grinning at him. “You deserve this. In my professional opinion, there's no one more qualified.”
Touya shook his head, red extending all the way to the tips of his ears. “You're too good to me, you know that?”
Pride flared his chest at that, he stepped closer to Touya, gently smoothing a lock of hair back behind his red ear. “It's just the truth, Touya.”
Touya leaned into his touch. “Well, I like the way you deliver the truth then.”
Keigo tugged playfully at his ear making Touya yelp. “There's also yakisoba in the fridge, I'm not planning on letting you starve.”
Touya smirked, his flush dying down, before nipping Keigo’s wrist in retaliation. “You like me so much, birdie.”
Birdie. Touya liked nicknames, he had a good few for all of his friends, and it didn't take a genius to notice Keigo's attachment to birds. But still, Keigo melted a little every time Touya called him that. It meant they were friends, it meant Touya had decided to choose him, and it was something that was just theirs.
Keigo smiled down at him, running his fingers through Touya’s soft white hair. “Can you blame me?”
Touya bit his lip, red splattering across his cheeks again. “Keigo,” he whined.
“Touya,” Keigo sang back at him.
Touya stood up properly, arms folded. “Stop being nice to me, I'll throw up.”
Keigo burst out laughing, fingers tracing Touya's bicep. “Go tell the others the good news, you stupid bitch. That better?”
Touya huffed. “No you can't be mean to me, I have a fragile ego.”
Keigo pressed his smile into Touya's shoulder. “Oh I'm so sorry, your Highness, could you find it in your heart to forgive my transgressions?”
“Feed me yakisoba.”
Keigo laughed again, gently taking Touya's hand in his and brushing his lips against it as he spoke. “Anything for you, Touya.”
Touya immediately went scarlet yet again, yanking his hand back. “Unhand me, you fiend.”
Keigo laughed, shoving him out of the kitchen. “Go tell your friends about your promotion, Touya.”
“Noooo,” Touya whined, sinking back into Keigo’s chest. “They'll like compliment me, I can barely handle you complimenting me.”
“This is what happens when you succeed in life, sweetheart,” Keigo said, holding up Touya’s entire body weight.
“Can I go back to failing? I have like a master's degree in failing.”
“You think so highly of yourself.”
“My daddy issues run deep, what can I say?”
Keigo snorted. “What and mine don't?”
That had been a thing. Talking to Touya about their childhoods. The League were all pretty open about that kind of stuff, if it's out in the open at least everyone knows what's going on. Keigo had never really talked about it before. He'd mentioned things in front of Rumi and his other friends, she'd been the only one to put enough pieces together to get the gist, but he'd never just come out with everything.
It was easier to just shove it all in the past, the less he thought about it the better.
But he'd been tipsy, legs draped across Touya's lap on Magne’s couch, and it all came tumbling out onto Touya's throat where he'd pressed himself into. It was Touya's fault really, he'd been talking about his dad, the crushing weight of expectations and the punishments that came when those expectations weren't met. Keigo had wanted him to know he understood, that he wasn't just placating him.
Touya stuck his tongue out at him. “Alright, fine. I'll face my demons or whatever.”
“You mean your friends being happy for you?”
Touya waved a lazy hand, taking his weight on his own two feet again. “Yeah, yeah, semantics, birdie.”
Keigo laughed as Touya marched out of the kitchen like he was facing a firing squad. He turned back to his salmon, cutting it up in small strips like Kurogiri had taught him, smiling a little stupidly.
* * *
Touya wasn’t quite sure when Keigo started to be so prominent in his life. Maybe it was when he showed up to everything Jin invited him to. Maybe it was when they talked about their shitty childhoods. Maybe it was when Keigo started to always have a hand on him in some way. Maybe it was when Touya started to gravitate towards him in every room.
Point was, this was getting out of hand.
Keigo was passed out on Touya’s bed, curled up in Touya’s hoodie, his hair all over the place and only one sock on.
“Fuck Keigo, what the hell are you doing to me?” Touya muttered, completely exasperated.
Tomura was leaning against the doorframe, looking at Touya in a way that was almost full of concern. “Have you two… talked about this?”
Touya squinted over his shoulder at him. “About what?”
Tomura raised an eyebrow and gestured to Keigo. “This.”
Touya blinked at him. “You were there…? Landlord selling his apartment? Needs a place to crash for a week or so?”
Tomura dragged a hand down his face. “That’s not what I’m talking about. But I’ll take that as a no to my actual question.”
Touya rolled his eyes and shoved past Tomura back into the hallway. “I don’t know what you’re asking me.”
“Bullshit.” Tomura closed the bedroom door and wheeled around to face Touya. “You’ve been down bad for him since the day you met.”
Touya winced, glancing at the bedroom door. “What does that have to-”
“And Keigo is fully aware of it.” Tomura pointed a finger to Touya’s chest. “So do I have to punch him in the face or have you two had a damn discussion about this?”
“About what?”
“About how he’s leading you on, you idiot!”
Touya huffed, folding his arms and leaning back against the hallway wall. “That’s not-”
“Oh give over, Touya.” Tomura scratched irritably at his neck. “Explain any of this then. Explain what the fuck the two of you have been doing for months.”
Touya shrank in on himself. “I don’t know.”
“You do know-”
“What do you want me to say, Shigs?” Touya sighed. “That I’m probably a little in love with him? That I like having him around more than the idea of losing him by talking about it? What fucking difference does it make?”
Tomura tore his hands away from his neck. “You can’t just leave it like this.”
“Why not?”
“Because living in this weird limbo you two have going on? It’s driving you insane, Touya.”
Touya dug his fingers into his arms and tapped his foot rhythmically against the floor. “I’ve never- I don’t know how to- what if I-” Touya groaned and dropped down into a crouch. “What if I’m- what if there’s too much of him in me? What if I can’t let Keigo go the same way he couldn’t let my mother go?”
Tomura laughed hollowly. “Seriously? You think Keigo’s going to reject you and then what? You suddenly feel the urge to force him to marry you and bear you four kids for your own dreams of glory?”
Touya took a shaky breath. “Not that. I don’t know. I don’t know, Shigs.”
Tomura crouched down in front of him and glared at him through his stupid bangs. “And what if he doesn’t reject you?”
“I don’t know,” Touya gasped out, feeling incredibly small.
“So you’re just going to let the fear of the unknown trap you both like this?”
Touya breathed out slowly. “You said he knew. Why aren’t you grilling him, huh?”
Tomura shrugged. “Cause I’ll probably kill him if he doesn’t say he wants you as much as you want him.”
Touya shook his head. “That’s not fair, Shigs.”
“You’re my best friend, shithead. You expect me to just let him hurt you?”
“He’s not trying to-”
“Then what the fuck is he doing?” Tomura demanded.
Touya closed his eyes and let his head thump back against the wall. “I don’t know.”
“Then talk to him, dickhead.”
“I’ll think about it.”
“Touya-”
Touya’s eyes flew open. “I said I’ll think about it, Tenko.”
Tomura inhaled sharply. “That’s not the same thing. Don’t do that, Touya.”
“What? So I’m supposed to have all my shit magically sorted out but you get to still feel unworthy of your own name? How’s that fair?”
Tomura sighed, refusing to look at him. “Fine. When he breaks your heart don’t say I didn’t try.”
“Fine. When Shuichi finds your ID one day, I’m not going to say shit.”
Something murderous flashed in Tomura’s dark eyes. “You’re such an asshole.”
“Right back at you, bitch.” Touya shoved at Tomura’s shoulder. “I hate that he still has a hold over you.”
“Right back at you, idiot,” Tomura said, shoving Touya’s knee.
* * *
Keigo came back from a long shift, he had to put down three animals that day, then go apartment hunting, forgetting to eat anything from 7am that morning, just to find Touya sitting on the floor of his sitting room surrounded by shards of glass and flowers.
Keigo was crouched in front of him instantly, checking over his hands and face where blood had dried. “Are you hurt?”
Touya laughed a little maniacally. “Nowhere you can fix, birdie.”
Keigo leaned closer, gently pushing Touya’s hair out of his eyes - his bloodshot blue eyes. “What can I do?”
“Why do you fucking want to do anything?” Touya’s gaze was fierce despite the tear stains and red splotches on his face.
Keigo gnawed on his lip. He’d known for days this was coming. Well, not Touya smashing a vase of flowers, but Touya confronting him about them. He wasn’t sure if he and Tomura had wanted him to hear their conversation, but a childhood of shouting just a door away meaning disaster was too hard to train out of him.
Still, even with days to think it over, Keigo didn’t feel like he had a satisfactory answer.
“I hate seeing you like this, Touya.”
Touya scoffed. It was a non-answer and they both knew it. “Then don’t look.”
“Can’t do that.” Keigo’s hand moved down Touya’s face, tilting his chin up towards him. “I’ll only look away if you force me to.”
Touya studied his face. “My father sent them.”
“Oh.”
Touya smiled, all fake and painful. “He’s grown a conscience apparently. He’s oh so very sorry.”
Keigo ran a thumb along Touya’s jaw. “You seem incredibly forgiving, sweetheart.”
A more genuine laugh escaped out of Touya’s mouth. “Would you be?”
Keigo looked at the wreck Touya had surrounded himself with. “I don’t know. Maybe.”
“You’ve got such a bleeding heart.” Touya caught him by the collar of his shirt. “Is that what’s going on?”
“No,” Keigo said, firmly. He looked back to Touya, knocking their foreheads together. “No, never.”
“Then what is?” Touya asked.
Keigo inhaled shakily. “I don’t know. I just- I don’t want to lose you.”
“What the fuck does that mean, Keigo?” Touya was still beautiful like this, draped in a fury of past and present and all the hurt that came with it.
“I don’t think we’d work,” Keigo blurted out.
Touya opened his mouth - probably to tear Keigo a new asshole - so Keigo’s stupid mouth kept running.
“It’s not that I don’t- fuck, Touya. I care about you, alright? Probably more than I have any right to. But we’re a disaster waiting to happen. There’s just too much. We can barely keep a lid on our own shit, never mind everything that comes with- with an us.”
“You mean I can’t,” Touya said flatly.
“That’s not what I fucking said.”
“It’s what you fucking meant.”
Keigo sighed and dropped down on his ass, uncaring of the glass on the floor. “Please, Touya, I have enough fucking problems of my own-”
“Oh really-”
“You’re gay, Touya,” Keigo snapped.
Touya stared at him like he was an idiot. “Yeah that’s kinda why we’re talking about this-”
“No.” Keigo grabbed a discarded flower and started ripping it apart. “You’re gay and I’m not- I’m not like other men.”
Touya’s face somehow became even more condescending. “Are you serious? You think I give a shit that you’re trans-”
“I do,” Keigo fired back. “I give too much of a shit.”
Touya threw his hands in the air. “Right. That’s great. So we just- are we just friends then?”
Keigo was so tired and hungry and done. “What do you want me to say, Touya?”
“I don’t know,” Touya snarled, “maybe I don’t fucking want you to say anything.”
Keigo slammed a hand down in the space between Touya’s legs and leaned back into Touya’s face. “Then what do you want me to do?”
He could hear Touya’s breath catching in his throat and the last shred of Keigo’s rationality was torn apart and thrown amongst the wreckage on the floor.
He crawled into Touya’s lap, hands hauling Touya’s head back so his mouth could meet his. He kissed him with an anger and a desperation that Touya fiercely reciprocated. Keigo parted his lips - maybe to bare his teeth, maybe to beg Touya for the impossible - and Touya’s tongue was in his mouth, his hands on his hips, keeping him planted against him. Keigo wound his arms around Touya’s neck, his hands grabbing at the back of his shirt.
He was completely caught up in him. His sanity dripped out of him with every flick of Touya’s tongue, his reason thrown to the wind with each of Touya’s shaky breaths, his wits being hauled out of him by Touya’s needy fingers digging into his body just as much as they were roaming it.
When they finally stopped, Keigo was just a breathless sack of meat sitting on top of the man he might be falling for at a pace too fast for their own good.
“That was a bad idea,” Touya laughed, his mouth forming the words along Keigo’s throat.
“I’m so pissed off with you,” Keigo gasped, gripping Touya’s hair to keep him exactly where he was.
“I can tell.” Touya nipped at Keigo’s throat, who keened in response. “Feeling’s mutual, darling.”
“Fuck, that’s the problem isn’t it?” Keigo caught Touya’s chin and planted a kiss on his mouth. “Who’s going to stop me from doing this?”
Touya smirked at him, his hands trailing up Keigo’s sides. “I really want you to keep doing this.”
Keigo bit Touya’s lip, earning a yelp for his efforts. “Not helping, Touya.”
“Not fucking trying to help,” Touya murmured, punctuating each word with a press of his lips to Keigo’s jaw.
“Fuck, you’re so irritating,” Keigo snarled. “I’m trying to be - fuck - I’m trying to be realistic.”
Touya hummed before biting down beneath Keigo’s ear and sucking at the skin there. The moan Keigo let out would’ve been fucking embarrassing if he wasn’t trying to focus on their stupid fucking conversation.
“Don’t care,” Touya said, running his tongue along the mark he definitely left behind. “Now I know you want me to touch you.”
“Touya.” Keigo’s fingernails were digging into Touya’s shoulders. “Fuck. We really shouldn’t.”
“So you keep telling me.”
Keigo used his grip on Touya’s shoulders to push him backwards, making sure to keep his elbows straight so there was enough distance between their mouths to avoid him doing more stupid shit.
“Think about it.” Keigo was trying desperately not to think about the growing bulge in Touya’s trousers or how wide his pupils had gone as he stared up at him. “Touya come on, I don’t even have a damn roof over my head right now. You just had your father pull this shit on you. We fucking work together. Don’t act like this would just fizzle out and be an amicable breakup.”
Touya sighed, tracing mindless patterns along Keigo’s thighs. “I much preferred the kissing over this.”
“Well so did I,” Keigo snapped, “but you mean more to me than that.”
Touya opened and closed his mouth, thoroughly stunned. Keigo could feel the raging flush splashing across his face.
“You deserve better than empty promises, Touya. I can’t give you anything right now, let alone be the kind of partner you deserve. You’re like an inferno, baby, you’re wild and unpredictable and so fucking gorgeous, I won’t lie to you and say I don’t want to watch you burn bright and spectacularly and tell everyone you're mine-”
“Keigo-” Touya breathed, eyes widening.
“-but we just wouldn't work out, we're both so intense and fucked up-”
“Keigo-”
“-the last thing I want to do is break you, love, you've gotten enough shit-”
Touya reached up a hand and covered Keigo’s mouth with it. “Let me show you something, birdie. Please?”
Keigo sobbed into Touya's hand, already emotionally wrung out, but choked out an “okay.”
“It's going to be alright, okay?” Touya said, sounding like he was trying to convince himself of it too. His shaking hands went to the collar of his shirt before pulling it over his head.
“Touya,” Keigo breathed. He was already obsessed with the expanse of bare skin before him, he wanted to trace those delicate collarbones with his tongue, twist those fucking nipple piercings with his fingers, kiss along that soft, scarred stomach-
“Eyes up here, dove.” Keigo forced his eyes to meet Touya's. “That's a good boy.” Keigo couldn't stop the way his hips jerked, grinding down into Touya. “Shit, Keigo-”
“Touya,” he pleaded, for what he wasn’t sure. To put a stop to this? To give into this?
Touya pushed himself back into a sitting position, Keigo thoroughly defenceless against him. “Look here, on the back of my shoulder, okay?”
Keigo sat up on his knees properly, pulling Touya closer to him so he could see what-
Red wings spread out across Touya’s back, feathers rustling and shifting like they were catching a breeze, drawn with sharp purposeful strokes, stretching out until they covered Touya's shoulders, the sides of his ribs, down along his back muscles, some individual feathers flying off onto his arms and neck.
Keigo was hauling his own shirt over his head, sparing half a thought for the peeling tape on his chest and blisters from where it had pulled at his skin, but he needed to know-
Blue flames crackled fiercely up his left side, dancing along his hip, his stomach, his ribs, they were practically glowing-
Touya was moving before Keigo could even truly comprehend it all, yanking them both to their feet, trailing hot open-mouthed kisses along the left side of Keigo's neck where his flames were surely burning.
“If you even think,” Touya growled against his skin, “that I'm not taking you apart right fucking now-”
“Touya,” Keigo gasped, letting Touya push him towards his bedroom. “Touya.”
Touya paused in the doorframe of his bedroom, pulling back just enough that Keigo could see the set of his jaw and his burning blue eyes. “You can tell me to stop,” he said, breathless. “I'm serious, Keigo, whenever you want.”
Keigo caught Touya's mouth in a bruising kiss. “Same goes for you,” he said into his mouth.
“We're not fucking friends,” Touya said, his voice dropping, sending shivers down Keigo’s spine. “That's not what this means.”
“No,” Keigo agreed, pulling Touya by the belt towards the bed. “You're all mine, my pretty firestarter.”
“Fuck, yeah, I'm all yours.” Touya tugged at Keigo's trousers until they pooled around his ankles. “What do you want me to do to you, dove?”
Keigo impatiently undid Touya's belt, his hand slipping, down, down, against bare skin, grasping at Touya's cock. “Thought you were going to take me apart, pretty boy?”
Touya laughed, nipping at Keigo's ear and thrusting shallowly into his hand. “That can mean a lot of things, sweetheart, enlighten me won't you?”
Keigo let go of him to pull Touya’s trousers and boxers down, then slowly backed away from him until the backs of knees hit the bed. Touya eagerly stepped out of his trousers, his hands instantly going to the backs of Keigo's thighs, practically throwing him back onto the bed, before crawling up over him.
Keigo caught one of Touya's hands, guiding it to his boxers. “Take these off me.”
Touya hesitated, fingers ghosting over the fine hairs on Keigo’s stomach. “I thought you said…”
Keigo’s core lurched and not in a sexy way, more of a ‘throw up everything ever’ kind of way. “Shit. Okay.” Having a panic attack was so not hot. He needed to be calm. “I don’t know. I’ve never- I mean I have but it wasn’t good. I just kind of powered through it and broke down afterwards. I just- that’s like- I’m supposed to-”
Touya raised an eyebrow and flicked Keigo’s nose.
Keigo blinked and stared up at him, less panicky, more enraged, because what the fuck-
“You’re not supposed to do shit,” Touya said firmly. “All I expect from you is honesty. I don’t want to do shit you don’t want to do.”
Keigo groaned in frustration, grabbed Touya by the shoulders, and flipped their positions. “I want to do lots of shit.” He glared down at Touya, who was just looking up at him, flush creeping over his face. “It’s just… I don’t know what’s okay or what’s not okay. I don’t know if something will be okay one day and not the next. I don’t know if something will just suddenly not be okay halfway through. I might like start crying. Or panicking. I just…” Keigo dug his fingernails into Touya’s shoulders, something venomous crawling up his throat and coming out of his mouth. “I’m a disaster.”
Touya grinned a little and Keigo was half tempted to headbutt him. “Keigo-”
“Touya I will fucking-”
“You’re not a disaster, birdie. Okay. Maybe a little. In many ways.”
Maybe strangling him would be better. “Touya-”
“I’m just saying,” Touya said, properly grinning. “I’ve never even had sex before and honestly I might just blow my load if you keep looking at me like you’re going to kill me.”
Keigo stared down at him, completely at a loss. “What?”
“You just seem to be thinking that this is too much for me.” Touya laughed, reaching up to tug at Keigo’s hair. “I’m too much, Kei. It’s like my whole thing. So what, you see me smash my dad’s shitty apology, then I decide this is the best time to bring up our whole thing, and you still want to fuck my brains out. But what, I can’t deal with you being dysphoric?”
The wind was thoroughly taken out of Keigo’s sails, his shoulders slumping. “But, what if… there’s… you’re just like okay with that?”
Touya laughed again like an asshole. “Wait. Did you think I wanted some fucking perfect ass boyfriend? Keigo, I’m obsessed with you. You’re my soulmate, you dumb fuck, you’ve got shit, I’ve got shit. We’ll piss each other off and get upset and fuck up. But you’ll be there for me, and I’ll be there for you. Whatever the fuck our weird brains get up to.”
Keigo giggled a little. “You’ve really thought about this.”
Touya flushed completely scarlet, and Keigo was thoroughly enjoying how far his blush could go. “Wow, I try to be emotionally intelligent-”
Keigo laughed more, leaning down to bury it in Touya’s throat.
“-put my best foot forward, comfort you when you’re being a little bitch-”
Keigo pinched Touya’s side in retaliation, still laughing.
“-I put my heart in your hands, my soul is literally on your skin-”
Keigo started mouthing at Touya’s throat, his tongue and teeth getting a touch violent.
“-shit, Kei, you’re interrupting my fucking monologue-”
Keigo’s hands were moving, running up Touya’s sides, grabbing at him. “I’m still listening, sweetheart, go on. Air your grievances, baby.”
“I fucking hate you,” Touya gasped, before grabbing Keigo by the hair and kissing him stupid.