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English
Series:
Part 3 of #messdrabbles
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Published:
2016-06-15
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932
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1/1
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three's a crowd

Summary:

Jongdae and Baekhyun are just regular dudes who sometimes kill people for money, and sometimes bug each other's expensive laptops. Sehun works the genius bar at the local apple store and has to deal with this shit.

Notes:

genius bar au + assassins au = ....this, apparently?

Work Text:

Jongdae is gonna kill Baekhyun. Absolutely murder him.

His laptop felt slightly heavier than normal when he picked it up this morning. About half an ounce heavier, maybe a bit less. Just enough weight for one of Baekhyun’s teeny tiny surveillance devices.

“You voided the goddamn warranty!” Jongdae screams at the underside of his laptop. He huffs and sits back on the couch, scrolling through Apple store locations on his phone. There’s a nice shiny kill bonus sitting in his bank account and he might as well spend it on a replacement macbook.

A new message pops up from Baekhyun, quickly followed by another. The first one is an address, something inside some mall. The second one reads I know a guy at this store’s genius bar, you can have him take it out.

Jongdae would be touched if not for the third message: Well, you can have him try ;)

/ / /

It takes him an hour to get to the mall that Baekhyun had directed him to, but Jongdae figures it’s worth it if he doesn’t have to buy a new laptop. Plus, he’s curious about this guy that Baekhyun knows. If he isn’t gonna ask questions about a bug in a laptop, he must be in the game too. Jongdae’s not sure if he’s reassured by the fact that an unfamiliar assassin will likely be handling his laptop full of secrets.

Being a tuesday morning, the mall isn’t too crowded. The Apple store has a few people inside, mercifully not packed for once. He heads back to the genius bar and scans the nametags on his way over. There’s a cute one named Joonmyun, but next to him is the guy Jongdae’s looking for. His lanyard nametag says Sehun but his eyebrows say “leave me alone.”

Thankfully, mercenary killers aren’t easily intimidated. Jongdae saunters up to him and sets his macbook on the counter. “Did Baekhyun tell you to expect anyone?” he asks, trying to keep his voice nonchalant. Maybe Jongdae is a little intimidated once he’s up close.

“Yeah. Jongdae, then?” Sehun’s voice is actually kind of adorable. It’s deeper but Jongdae can still tell that he’s a few years younger than he looks.

Nodding, Jongdae points to his laptop and glances at Joonmyun. The other boy seems engrossed in his phone over at the opposite end of the counter. Seems. Jongdae keeps his voice low and asks, “Did he explain the bullshit he pulled, bugging my macbook?” Sehun nods, solemn but for one twitch of his mouth. Jongdae can’t blame him; if it wasn’t his own laptop he’d think it was hilarious. Maybe he’s only mad that he didn’t think of it first.

Sehun’s eyebrows raise as he picks up the laptop. “That’s noticeable. Would have thought Baekhyun was better than that.”

“He’s all talk,” Jongdae laughs. That nice big bonus had come from Baekhyun’s employer, impressed with how quickly Jongdae had completed Baekhyun’s work. In hindsight, that’s probably why Baekhyun did this.

Jongdae watches with dwindling nerves as Sehun deftly opens up the laptop and searches for the bug. It’s on the left side, like he’d thought earlier. The thin black box looks like it’ll never move and Jongdae has good reason to suspect that it won’t. Baekhyun may be slow, but he’s meticulous.

Sehun pries at the thing, careful of the surrounding parts, but gets nowhere. He looks up with a creased forehead and a downturned mouth. “I think I’ll have to keep this overnight, try it with some of my tools at home,” he mutters. Jongdae can tell he’s not used to being foiled. Must not hang around Baekhyun very much. Or himself, for that matter.

He smiles and agrees, thinking of ways he’ll get Baekhyun back. Bugging was a good idea, he’s sad that it’s already been taken.

/ / /

The drive back the next morning is jittery. While he was away from his laptop, Jongdae realized how much is on it. It’s all encrypted, of course, but maybe not strongly enough to keep out prying eyes. He wants to trust Sehun but only scrutinized him for about 5 minutes before handing it all over.

The store is just as empty as yesterday, if not more so, and Jongdae wonders if Sehun had anything to do with that. There’s no Joonmyun over in the corner either, just Sehun’s lanky figure behind the counter.

Sehun is jovial enough when he hands the macbook over in a new cardboard box, apparently packed tightly with bubble wrap. Jongdae appreciates the concern for his laptop but notes the way Sehun’s smile tightens as he hands it over. The tiny device is laying on the counter, seeming unharmed.

“I wanted to make sure Baekhyun’s equipment wasn’t broken,” Sehun says when he notices Jongdae staring at it.

“Thank you. I’ll take it back to him then.” Jongdae is starting to wonder if the two are in on something together. But whatever, he’s just glad to have his laptop back. One night without netflix was enough.

At every stoplight on the way home, he fingers the black strip and ponders how Baekhyun could have made it. He starts to think that they might actually work better together, but remembers that he’s supposed to be plotting revenge. The rest of the drive is consumed by grand delusions of tar and feathers.

It’s when he unwraps his freshly-fixed laptop that he notices: it’s even heavier than yesterday. The black strip that Sehun had given him must have been a fake.

“I’ll kill you both!” he yells at his macbook, almost smiling when he immediately gets two texts.

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