Chapter Text
If Yoshiki had to guess a time and place where he first got screwed over by his feelings for ‘Hikaru’; it would have to have been when he stabbed him.
He can still remember it. The blood on his hands, warm and sticky and in every sense of the word wrong. The way ‘Hikaru’ looked up at Yoshiki in confusion and dismay. The instant drop of Yoshiki’s stomach when he realized it was all for nothing. And the instant and mind-boggling relief that came with it. The assertion in his mind that he was fucked and that ‘Hikaru’ was fucked and that Yoshiki didn’t care. Yoshiki didn’t care.
It was then, in that bathroom, cleaning the blood off ‘Hikaru’s’ shirt where he made up his mind.
He would carry this boy’s sins with him forever (if you could even call the creature within his friend's corpse a boy).
And now as Yoshiki and him biked back from school, there was this determination in his mind. (Along with a tickling in the back of his throat).
Yoshiki stopped and watched as ‘Hikaru’ stumbled a bit before dragging his foot on the ground to steady himself during the sudden halt.
“Yoshiki?” He asked, anxiety painting his face. He was tapping his finger on the bike handle, and Yoshiki now knew him well enough to understand that if Yoshiki expressed any type of disappointment, anger, or any negative emotion, it would lead to the other boy to bolt and cry in his room for the rest of the week. So Yoshiki chose to smile. He wanted to comfort his monster.
“Hikaru…” He stared off, his voice low and steady. “Listen, about… about the other day I just wanted-”
“It's okay!” Hikaru interrupted, raising his hands in clear submission, and the image of a feral wolf whimpering away wormed its way into Yoshiki’s subconscious. “Really! Its fine! I know… I know that you had yer reasons and-”
It was Yoshiki’s turn to interrupt. Although he hesitated, like the coward he was, he hesitated. he wasn’t sure that he could bring his point across. He wasn’t sure if Hikaru knew what he did was wrong. Earlier, he had said that he didn’t understand what the big deal was about dying. “You just change a little,” was what he said. Yoshiki took a deep breath. “Do ya understand what ya did to Mrs. Matsura?” He asked, trying his damndest to keep his voice level. “Really. Do ya fully understand what ya did?”
‘Hikaru’ bowed his head like a dog that had dug out the trash and was now being scolded by its owner. “No. No, I don’t.”
Of course, he didn’t. This- this thing that was in his best friend’s body didn’t have a clue what it meant to be human, what it meant to-
“It's alright. It's too complicated for ya to understand anyway.” Yoshiki dismissed, waving the issue away like it wasn’t about one of the worst sins a person could commit. He caught a glimpse of ‘Hikaru’ deflating a bit, tears welling up in his eyes, and Yoshiki paved on. “Don’t worry. If ya ever end up killing anyone else, I’ll carry that sin with ya.” He smiled. He lifted his head so that his bangs no longer covered ‘Hikaru’s’ face. He would shape him. He would help him see what was right and wrong. It would take time and would be all on Yoshiki if ‘Hikaru’ ever messed up, but he was willing to shoulder the blame. He was willing to keep Hikaru in his life. Because he wasn’t dead. He was. But Yoshiki was willing to pretend. He needed to pretend. He needed Hikaru too mu-
The itch that had been bothering Yoshiki for the entire day suddenly bloomed into a body-wracking cough. It shook Yoshiki down to his bones. It cut off the air to his lungs. And Hikaru- No. ‘Hikaru’ came running to help. His bike hit the ground in an ear-percing screech that almost resembled a scream as metal met metal. The cicadas buzzed louder, drowning everything out, filling his ears, his ears, his ears, his-
“Yoskiki!” ‘Hikaru’ sobbed, snapping Yoishiki out of his stupor. His hands were on Yoshiki’s shoulders, spots of blood were covering his bare arms that were so, so warm, and panic was in every inch of his face and body. It didn’t register what had just happened until ‘Hikaru’ glanced down, and his eyes followed, landing on a pile of blood-covered lillies of the valley. They weren’t native to Japan. They weren’t even native to this hemisphere of the world. He didn’t remember falling, but his knees hurt from where they hit the dirt road.
Is this what it meant to ‘mix’ with the supernatural? Was Yoshiki being possesed by some flower obsesed ghost?
‘Hikaru’s’ tears were gone now that Yoshiki was responding. He looked down at the petals, and his fingers gripped Yoshiki tighter. Enough for it to hurt. “You’re in love.” ‘Hikaru’ said, his tone strange and warped with what almost sounded like resignation.
Yoshiki took a painful breath. ‘In love’ hung between them uncomfortably, like a body.
Deny deny deny deny deny deny deny deny deny because I don't don't don't don't don't don't don't
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Yoshiki deflected as he slapped away ‘Hikaru’s’ hands. He stood up and picked his bike up off the ground. The drone of the cicadas was deafening, and the pain in his chest refused to dim. “Come on. It’s getting late. We'd better start heading home.”
Yoshiki hopped on his bike and began to pedal away as fast as he could.
“Oh, okay.” Was all ‘Hikaru’ said before following in Yoshiki’s wake.
The next day at school, ‘Hikaru’ was clingy. Disgustingly clingy.
He hung off of Yoshiki’s arm, nearly tripping him as he tried to walk to the bathroom or the supply closet, or the shoe lockers. He sat a bit too close to Yoshiki during lunch and laughed too loudly, attracting the attention of their friends, reciveing strange looks or amused admitions of confusion. It was as if ‘Hikaru’ wanted to make up for what happened yesterday by showering Yoshiki in suffocating affection. And this affection was drowning him.
At every turn, Yoshiki had to excuse himself to cough into a handkerchief inside an empty storage closet, or into the bathroom sink in the rare moments of solitude that ‘Hikaru’ would allow him. Yoshiki achieved these moments with phrases like “Jeez, what do ya want ter watch me take a leak for?” “Let go! yer acting like a koala!” and “I just need ter check to see if they have an extra mop. I spilled my drink everywhere because of ya!”. As soon as Yoshiki managed to be alone, he hacked out dozens of white bell-shaped blooms, tainted by the red of his blood. Everyone he spat out left him weaker and his throat itchier as if getting rid of them was making everything worse.
He looked at himself in the bathroom mirror, somehow, his reflection didn’t look like him. A memory bubbled up to the surface:
”Yer always thinking too hard about things, Yoshiki. You really need to learn how to just let yer mind be blank.” Hikaru said as he continued to beat Yoshiki in smash bros, grinning evily as the round ended and declared him the winner. There was something mundane about him, now looking back. It was so different from ‘Hikaru’s’ inherent and overly excited joy at everything this world had to offer.
“I hope yer not saying that I should fail all my classes so that I can sit with ya in supplementary subjects.” Yoshiki retorted as he leaned against the table.
Hikaru pretended to look offended. “See! Yer thinking too much! Now yer able to look past my schemes!”
Yoshiki sighed. What was wrong with him? Why was he thinking about him while he was standing here, coughing up blooms from the other side of the world? He shook his head and splashed his face with water before leaving the bathroom.Or at least, he tried to. The door to the bathroom was locked from the outside. Yoshiki’s breath quickened, and he began to panic as he wrenched on the door with all his strength. A chill ran down his spin and suddenly the world shifted to a blood-red. An evil presence slithered up his spine and wrapped around his throat, choking him with pretty white petals as TV static shrieked in his ears.
Yoshiki began to scream.
“Hikaru! Hikaru!” He yelled as he slammed his body against the door, clawing and scratching at the door so hard he left grooves in the wood. “Hikaru!” He screamed once more before the door opened and Yoshiki spilled through, the red filter on the world now gone and the evil feeling completely gone. Maki stood on the other side, his eyes wide in complete bewilderment as he surveyed Yoshiki panting on the floor, cold sweat dripping from his forehead.
“Yoshiki? I, uh, I heard screaming, are ya- are you okay?” he asked, extending a hand to help Yoshiki up.
Yoshiki didn’t register Maki’s words at first; the horror of the spirit in the bathroom still paralyzing Yoshiki in fear.
“Yoshiki?”
“I’m fine. I just saw a roach in there. It was a flying one.” Yoshiki lied, grabbing Maki’s hand to pull himself up.
Instantly Maki’s face screwed up in disgust. “Aw man, that's gross. Now we're gonna haf’ta spend more time cleaning after school.”
Shit. Great job Yoshiki. Now you're going to have to spend even longer cleaning because of a stupid lie.
Yoshiki shrugged.
“Well I saw a window open earlier, maybe it was just a cicada that got trapped in here, not a cockroach. Its a bit unlikely that a school this clean would attract any pests. I just panicked a bit at the sight of it. I must have been mistaken. Sorry…”
Maki laughed and clapped Yoshiki on the back. “Hah! Of course you'd get confused! Imagine if Hikaru found out-”
“If I found out about what?”
Yoshiki and Maki turned around to find ‘Hikaru’ standing a few feet behind them. He was glaring daggers at Maki, which Yoshiki found strange. He had never had a problem with Maki, in fact the two loved to joke around with each other, so why…?
Maki didn't seem to notice ‘Hikaru's’ grumpyness and proceeded to poke fun at Yoshiki. “Yoshiki completely freaked out. He mistook a cicada for a roach in the restroom and began to scream his head off!”
At that ‘Hikaru’ completely changed his demeanor. He covered his smirk with his hand and his eyes squinted in delight as he looked at Yoshiki’s disheveled figure. “Really, Yoshiki? I thought yer were much tougher than that! Yer always putting on such a tough boy act I thought you wouldn't be scared by some little bug.” He snickered.
Yoshiki felt his face go red. He made his way over to ‘Hikaru’ and grabbed his arm. He dragged him away from Maki before either of them could further embarrass him. “Come on, I need you to help me get the mop and broom out of the supply closet.” He grumbled.
“You want us in there together?” ‘Hikaru’ teased, low enough so no one else would hear. “Huh, it seems like yer really comin’ onto me.”
“Shut up.” Yoshiki replied, his face burning like a hot skillet.
They swiveled through the hallways and made it inside the supply closet, locking the door behind them.
Yoshiki took a deep breath and sat down on an empty box. He let the silence ground him for a moment as he recollected himself.
“Well?” ‘Hikaru’ asked, seeming to be a little bit uncomfortable since they were so close together. His voice cut through the silence in a way that made Yoshiki’s spine crawl. The image of marinated chicken flashed through his mind for some damn reason.
“There’s a spirit in the bathroom.” He said quietly.
The smile slipped off ‘Hikaru’s’ face. “What?”
“You heard me. There's a spirit in the bathroom. And I wanna know if ya can eat it before it possesses someone….” Yoshiki trailed off, remembering the last bathroom spirit they dealt with and how it had passed Yoshiki, causing him to try and kill ‘Hikaru’.
‘Hikaru’ seemed to be in a similar train of thought because for once, he seemed to be completely silent. He shrugged slightly before responding. “I can't be that hard ter get rid of it. The last one only gave me a little bite and a nose bleed.”
Relief coursed through Yoshiki, and he allowed his shoulder to relax. “Good. Now let's get outta here. It's way ter stuffy here.” He opened the door slowly, trying to make sure the squeak of the door’s hinges didn't attract anyone's attention, only to find that the hallway, which was previously filled with students loitering outside of classrooms at the end of school, was completely empty. The only thing that was there was a six foot tall outline of a woman, her hair going down to the floor and her wrists level with her knees. Her mouth was only visible because her pearly white teeth were cacked in blood. It seemed to be fresh.
“Shit.” was the last thing Yoshiki said before the world went red.