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For all their efforts, the honmoon has not turned gold.
It’s stable, yes. Tears are rarer than they’ve ever been, and demons never show up in packs bigger than two or three. But they still come through, and Rumi can’t help but wonder if it’s her fault. She’s managed to accept herself, and knows that her friends love her just as much, patterns or no patterns. But what if there was more she could’ve done in that moment? What that might be, she doesn’t know, but there must have been something.
They’ve all put their faith in her. Jinu had faith in her. Enough to give her his soul.
Even now, Rumi can’t think about him for very long before her eyes begin to sting and the weight in her chest grows unbearably heavy.
She goes out alone, some nights. Mira and Zoey had protested at first, worried that with Gwi-Ma so humiliated, he would leap at the chance to unleash his wrath against a lone Hunter, no matter how weakened he was. But they’ve seemed to realize that she needs this; that some things are hers alone to know and to remember. She needs time to grieve the man that only she had seen the truth of, the man who had seen her in return.
She knows he did it to save her, but it doesn’t soothe the ache of his absence. He’s left a wound that she fears will never heal. She isn’t sure she wants it to. Forgetting, she thinks, would be worse than hurting.
She leans against the side of the building where they had once been together; the place where she had promised that the both of them could be free. And even if he’d told her that she had given him that back, it doesn’t make it hurt any less.
How is it fair that she gets to leave the past behind, when he is now part of it?
A deep, hostile growl cuts through her thoughts.
Rumi whirls around, summoning her sword just in time to see two hissing figures crawl through a jagged rip in the honmoon.
One is tall and broad, with cruel curved horns and a sickle moon grin that shows off razor sharp fangs. The smaller one looks less intimidating, but when it opens its mouth, it spews an ugly grey liquid at her. She dodges the stream and it lands upon the pavement, sizzling and smoking as it eats through the asphalt.
“Okay, should probably avoid that,” she mumbles to herself as she spins on her heel to avoid getting a chunk taken out of her shoulder by the bigger demon’s snapping jaws.
She whirls around, barely avoiding another stream of acid, and charges forward, delivering a vicious slash to the horned demon’s torso. The smaller one manages to dodge her next swing, hissing, and in her effort to avoid its next attack of burning spit she stumbles too close to the other. She yelps as the big one manages to nick her arm with its claw; it’s a surface wound, but it’s still startling. It’s been so long since a demon has landed an actual blow on her. Not since Jinu was here, not since he left her…
Her distraction costs her. She’s half a second too slow on her next swing, and instead of cleaving through the horned demon’s skull, it manages to block the blade with the back of its scaled hand, claws sparking as they screech against the magical metal. The force of impact is jarring, a shockwave of pain going up Rumi’s forearms.
She stumbles, going down to one knee to avoid a complete fall. She braces herself and turns her sword to defend—the venomous demon’s acid doesn’t seem to damage its surface, unlike everything else it's touched. She manages to fend off another swipe from the larger one, arms still stinging from the first blow. She has to twist at an awkward angle to avoid more of the burning liquid from the other, and winces as her side protests the unnatural movement painfully. In normal circumstances two demons should be no problem for her, but she was caught off guard and she’s alone.
You’re fine, she tells herself fiercely. Don’t you dare let them get the upper hand.
She will not fall here. She refuses to let his sacrifice be in vain.
Rumi pushes herself to her feet and faces the demons, sweat dripping down her brow as she stands defiantly before them. The larger one roars and charges, and the smaller one bares its teeth and opens its mouth wide, ready to spew forth its burning venom again.
There’s a harsh jerk on her sword. She swears and looks down, wondering if another demon has slipped through the tear without her noticing and is trying to yank it out of her hands; she gapes in surprise when she sees there’s nothing there. The sword is moving on its own, pulling itself forward. She tightens her grip, but it’s useless. She watches in horror as her weapon betrays her, slipping from her hands.
But it doesn’t fall. Her eyes widen as the sword hovers in the air, glowing brighter and brighter. The light grows until it’s painful; Rumi throws her hands up and slams her eyes shut for fear of being blinded.
She may not be able to see, but her ears pick up on the demons’ terrified shrieks perfectly. She stumbles back, not wanting to be caught in the crossfire of whatever is happening in front of her. Their hisses and howls fade into nothingness quickly, and she hears the familiar whooshing sound as the tear in the honmoon seals over again.
The light, so bright she can still feel it through her closed eyelids, fades slowly. She waits several moments, just to be sure it’s safe, before opening her eyes again.
Her sword clatters to the ground. And in front of it, turned away from her, is a familiar silhouette.
Her lips form around a name, but she can’t bear to speak it aloud. If she does, this dream might shatter. Because she saw this person die; felt his soul swirl around her and dissipate.
The figure turns to face her, and a quiet cry escapes her.
“Rumi,” Jinu whispers. “Hi.”
Rumi sobs. Her hands tremble with the desire to reach out for him, but she doesn’t dare. He can’t be here. She’s died, the demons have overpowered her and this is her last, desperate vision before she leaves this plane of existence forever. She looks down at the ground, because she fears that if she looks at him for too long, he’ll disappear again. She couldn’t bear that.
She hears his footsteps as he approaches, soft and achingly familiar. No matter how long it’s been, she’ll never forget the slightest detail about him. Still, she refuses to look up. This isn’t real. It can’t be. It’s just one more cruel trick by Gwi-Ma, an effort to break her spirit once and for all. And this time, it just might work.
His hands cup her face. “Don’t cry,” he murmurs. “Please don’t cry. I can’t stand it.”
She only sobs harder, finally daring to meet his gaze. “How can’t I? I thought—you were gone, I saw you die!”
“I thought that too,” Jinu says, “but then…I wasn’t. I don’t know why. But I was still here. I couldn’t really feel; I didn’t know where I was at first. I couldn’t speak, or see you, but I knew you were there, close to me. I thought I’d be stuck forever, but then you—” he chokes on his words, and only then does she realize that he’s crying, too. “You were hurt. You were in danger, and all I knew was I couldn’t let that happen. And whatever was keeping me around…I guess it knew that too.” He blinks rapidly. “So here I am.”
Her mind is filled with questions, the hows and whys, but her heart doesn’t care about any of them. It doesn’t matter at all, because he is here in front of her, alive and well. She reaches up to grip his hands tightly with her own, determined to never let go again.
“It’s really you,” she says softly.
He nods. “It’s me.”
She buries her face in his chest. “You came back,” she whispers.
His hands are warm and his eyes are full of love, and he is real, real, real.
“You called.”
❥❥❥
It’s incredible how easily Jinu fits into her new life.
When she’d brought him back to their home, still not quite believing she wasn’t dreaming, it had of course been a shock to Mira and Zoey. There’d been a little protesting from Mira, always so protective and outspoken, but the both of them had seen him give his very soul to protect her, and her apprehensions didn't last long. Zoey, on the other hand, takes to him very quickly, eager to make friends with someone new and interesting. Rumi is delighted when Jinu seems just as endeared by her; one night he confesses that Zoey reminds him in some ways of his younger sister.
The idea of putting him in a guest bedroom never even crosses her mind; his pets are already living in her room anyway, so he might as well just move in too. At least, that’s how she explains it to Zoey and Mira, who both laugh at her for it, telling her she doesn’t need to make up excuses for wanting a cute boy in her room. Rumi is so happy about him being here at all that she isn’t even embarrassed by their teasing.
Jinu seems happy enough to go along with it, at least; it seems Rumi isn’t the only one who’s been longing to be near each other again. The first night he offers to sleep on the beanbag to be courteous, but she insists he join her in the bed, and the way he flushes bright red makes her want to giggle girlishly, barely resisting twirling a loose strand of hair around her finger. After that, there’s not a single night where they don’t curl up together under the covers.
It’s innocent at first; they kiss, and cuddle, but it hasn’t gone any further than that. Jinu hasn’t brought it up, and Rumi doesn’t want to seem pushy after the ordeal he must have gone through, his soul stuck in limbo for so long. But she’s only human, and sooner than later her willpower begins to wear down.
The penthouse is kept warm enough that he doesn’t need to keep his usual jacket on, and getting to see his biceps on a consistent basis is doing terrible and wonderful things to Rumi’s brain and heart and…other body parts. Trying not to stare is an impossible task. It’s even worse when he uses her shower and she’s painfully aware of the knowledge that the only thing separating his naked form from her is a single, thin door. It’d be so very easy to step inside, to offer him what she’s sure they both want…
It’s obvious that he knows, and she’s caught his gaze lingering on her body often enough to know that her desire is reciprocated. It’s only a matter of time.
When it finally happens, it’s on a night like any other. Mira and Zoey have gone to the bathhouse, and instead of trying to convince Rumi to join them when she makes an excuse, they just giggle and wish her luck. She scolds them, but her heart isn’t in it. Her stomach is full of butterflies, because she knows what they’re thinking, and they’re not wrong.
With the penthouse all to themselves, they have no qualms about being a little more physical. Rumi pulls Jinu onto the bed eagerly, kissing him until they’re both breathless. Even this isn’t unusual; they’ve made out before, though maybe not this intensely. He’s putting nearly all his weight on her, but she doesn’t feel pinned down, just secure. Like he’s reassuring the both of them that he’s real, and he’s not going anywhere.
“So,” she starts, trying not to give in to the anxiety bubbling up in her chest, “I’ve been thinking.”
He brushes a stray strand of hair from her face. “About?”
“Us,” she says, leaning into his touch. “What we do together. I want to do more.” Then her nerves finally win out and she adds in a rush, “But only if you want to!”
She watches his throat bob as he swallows, cheeks dusted red. “I, uh, I want that too.”
All her worries are washed away in an instant by the heat in his gaze. She clears her throat and murmurs, “Then you should probably, you know, take your shirt off.” She grasps at the hem of his t-shirt, emphasizing her point.
He makes a small, strangled sound before acquiescing, pulling it off and tossing it off the side of the bed. Rumi tries not to choke on her own spit as she takes in the sight of him, his well-defined muscles and smooth, perfect skin like something straight out of a work of art.
“Wow,” she manages to say, and he chuckles.
“Thanks,” he says, and she flushes.
“It’s not my fault you’re hot,” she says defensively.
“Look at yourself,” Jinu says, squeezing her hip, and she shivers pleasantly. “You’re a work of art.”
“Oh, really?” she teases lightly. “Want to see more of me, then?”
Jinu breathes out shakily. “You’re going to kill me. Yes.”
Rumi smiles as she begins to unbutton her pajama shirt, watching as his eyes dilate and his breathing grows heavier with every button she undoes. She finally gets it off and tosses it to the side to join his shirt. She’s not wearing a bra, both because she never wears one to bed and because she was admittedly hoping she’d get the chance to do more with him tonight.
“You’re gorgeous,” Jinu whispers, and she’s pretty sure he hasn’t even blinked since she started undressing.
She guides his hand under the waistband of her underwear, but he stills suddenly. She lets go, looking up at him in confusion and concern. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” he says quickly, “yeah, I’m fine.”
That…didn’t sound very convincing at all, actually. “Do you not want to?” Rumi’s heart sinks at the idea that he’s only saying yes because she’s so eager for it, that he might not be ready and she’s pressuring him into it without knowing.
He looks like she just kicked a puppy right in front of him. “No! I mean, yes! Yes, I want to. I’d love to. But you—are you really sure?”
“Jinu,” she says, “I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”
“Oh,” he says softly.
“I want this,” she says firmly. “Do you want this?”
Jinu’s eyes darken. “More than you could imagine.” His tone makes her shiver, a thrill going down her spine, but she’s confused when he pulls back, putting more distance between their faces and bodies. “But…I don’t want anyone to think less of you because of this.”
Her heart aches. “That won’t happen,” she says firmly, reaching up to touch his cheek, guiding his face back towards hers. “Mira and Zoey both know what you did for me. For all of us. They know that our patterns don’t define us.”
“It’s not that,” he says, refusing to meet her eyes. “It’s…If anyone found out that we had…I mean, we aren’t married, and you’re…”
Rumi blinks up at him in shocked silence before bursting into laughter. “Old man,” she cackles, “you old man!” The mortified look on his face only makes her laugh harder. “I really thought you meant—oh, my God. Jinu, I promise, I do not care. Zoey and Mira aren’t going to, like, shun me for having sex before marriage or whatever.”
He goes bright red. “You—listen, I’m not—I’m not used to how it works now! I wasn’t exactly getting action in the demon realm, how was I supposed to know that everybody was cool with it now?”
Rumi claps a hand over her mouth in an attempt to stifle her giggles. “Sorry, sorry,” she says, knowing she doesn’t sound very sorry at all. “I just wasn’t expecting that. Oh, come here, don’t pout.” She leans up to press a kiss to Jinu’s cheek, his skin still warm from embarrassment. “It’s sweet! You’re trying to protect my virtue.”
“Stop,” Jinu groans, but she can see how his mouth twitches, fighting off a smile. “I get it.”
“Prove it, then,” she says, and this time when she guides his hand down to her warmth he goes along willingly.
She’s touched herself to the thought of him before, but it doesn’t compare in the least to the real thing. The slightest touch from him against her has her gasping, and he swears under his breath. “You’re already so wet,” he whispers. “Can I…”
“Yes,” she says, trying not to sound too desperate. “Yes, please, yes.”
When his finger slides inside her she shudders, clenching around him. It’s not like she’s unused to this, she has a few toys and the stretch isn’t overwhelming, but just the knowledge that it’s him makes every sensation ten times stronger. She wraps her arms around his back, half to steady herself, half just to hold him close.
“Rumi,” he says softly, “you’re perfect. You feel perfect.”
“So do you,” she replies, and when his free hand comes up to cup her right breast gently she digs her teeth into her bottom lip.
Another finger slides inside her and she shivers, sparks shooting up her spine. “Jinu,” she gasps.
He presses his lips to the curve of her neck. “I’ve got you, pretty girl.”
She knows he does. He holds her like she’s the most precious thing in the universe, even as his touch becomes more confident, as he becomes more greedy with the hand on her breast while he keeps thrusting his fingers in and out of her.
“Oh,” he says suddenly, “don’t we need—do you have protection? I didn’t even think about it.”
Rumi shakes her head. “I have an IUD.” When he tilts his head in confusion, she clarifies, “It’s birth control.” She leans up slightly so she can speak close to his ear, “Don’t worry. You get to feel me completely.”
Jinu gives a full-body shudder. “You can’t—you can’t just say things like that, Rumi.”
She clenches around his fingers again and watches as his throat bobs up and down. “Why not?”
“Because it makes me want to—” he cuts himself off again. “I really want to be inside you.”
She moans, not just from the sensation of his fingers curling upward, but the pure want in his voice. “I want that, too.”
“Do you think you’re…is this enough?”
It’s not that the gentleman act isn’t hot, but she’s not a saint, and there’s a limit to her patience. “Oh, my God, Jinu, I want your dick in me now.”
He goes bright red again. But instead of any scandalized reply, he stays silent, biting his lip as he pulls his fingers out of her, making her shiver, and begins to pull down his sweatpants. She watches, fire burning even hotter in her belly, as he finally shows himself to her in his entirety. His cock is already hard, and it’s big, oh, fuck, she might cum just from the sight of it.
“I think I need another finger first,” she says bluntly, trying to keep her jaw from hanging open.
Jinu nods, still flushed, and returns his fingers to her pussy, sliding them back in. He gives her three this time, and the stretch burns, but not much. He could never hurt her.
Her moans slowly get louder as he fingers her open, and she bucks her hips up when he spreads them wide inside her, desperately wanting more. But he takes his time, nearly reverent in his movements. Rumi’s mind is in a paradox; she wants him to keep doing this, she wants his mouth on her, she wants him inside her, all at the same time. She tries to remind herself that they have all the time in the world to do all of that, and as delicious as the thought of him eating her out is, she files that away for later, the desire to have him finally fill her up just too strong.
“I think I’m ready,” she says after a few minutes, rolling her hips up again to emphasize her point.
“Okay,” Jinu says breathlessly. He begins to press inside and she feels the strong muscles of his back tense up under her hands. “Tell me if it’s too much,” he says, even as he grits his teeth and moans.
“It won’t be,” she promises, “not if it’s you.”
He pushes in slowly and she holds onto him tightly, nails digging into his back. She worries for a second they might pierce skin, since she always keeps them long and stiletto, but he only groans and kisses her again.
“I’m not—that doesn’t hurt, right?” She manages to ask through her whimpers.
He blinks. “You’re asking me that?” he shakes his head. “No. Don’t worry. I like it. It reminds me that you’re here. That I’m real.”
Rumi nearly tears up. “Okay,” she says softly.
Finally, he’s all the way inside, and she clenches around him, gasping. She’s never felt so full and warm and breathless. He’s panting lowly next to her ear, breath hot against her skin. He licks away the sweat that’s trickling down her neck and she shivers.
Jinu runs a hand through her hair gently. “Are you alright?”
“Yeah,” she squeaks out. “Never been better.” It does burn a little, but not nearly enough to make her back down.
He pouts a little, and it’s so cute she could melt. “Rumi.”
“I’m serious,” she says. “I’m okay. It’s good, just…new. You can try moving, if you want.” She wiggles her hips a little teasingly, knowing exactly what it’ll do to him.
He shudders. “I—fuck, okay. Just promise you’ll tell me if it hurts,” he says, and she nods.
“I promise. Now please, move.” She rolls her hips up again, and he bites his lip before giving an experimental thrust. His pupils visibly dilate, and he moans, doing it again.
“You feel amazing,” he gasps. “Rumi, I—” Both his hands are braced on the bed on either side of her shoulders, like he’s holding onto the last vestiges of his control.
“I know,” she says, “I feel it too.”
He groans, picking up the pace. Rumi’s whole body feels hot and tingly, and she wraps her legs around his hips so she can feel him even deeper. That only spurs him on, and she swears his eyes flash yellow for the briefest of moments as he fucks her harder. He kisses her, open-mouthed and messy, his tongue seeking hers. She arches up into him, a deep, feral craving for more rising in her chest, making her blood run hotter.
Suddenly he reaches under one of her thighs, pulling her leg up further so that it’s nearly over his shoulder. She practically squeals at that, surprised and pleased by his boldness. It seems she’s not the only one losing control. He somehow seems to get even deeper inside her with the new position.
“Oh, my God,” she whimpers as hits a spot inside her that nearly has her cumming on the spot. “Jinu!”
“There?” he asks.
“Yeah,” she says, nodding furiously. “Holy shit.”
His lips move down to take one of her nipples into her mouth, sucking gently as he keeps up the rhythm that makes her see stars. She moans, moving a hand up to grip at his hair. She’s practically writhing under him, hips bucking up helplessly. Now when she clenches down around his cock, it’s not out of any conscious effort; her body simply demands more, and Jinu is clearly happy to oblige.
His mouth returns to her neck, teeth nipping at her skin, not hard enough to break it but certainly enough to leave marks. She returns the favor, pressing her lips to his shoulder. “Fuck,” she whimpers as she feels fire coil tight in her belly. “I’m not—I’m gonna cum soon if you keep—ah!—doing that.”
“Good,” he replies, pupils blown so wide the iris are almost entirely eclipsed by black. “I want to see you fall apart for me.”
It’s those words, delivered with so much honesty and want, that tip her over the edge. Rumi throws her head back and nearly wails as she cums, walls clenching tight around him as her entire body shakes with the force of it. It’s like lightning up and down her spine, spreading to every inch of her. Jinu follows her only moments later, shuddering as he spills inside, and the heat of his release makes the crest of her own orgasm last longer. She holds on tight to him as she’s taken through it, unable to do anything but let herself be bowled over by the wave of pleasure.
Once her body has finally stopped shaking from the aftershocks, she lays there like a ragdoll for several moments, unable to do anything but blink up at the ceiling. “Holy shit,” she says when her voice is able to function again, “I’ve never cum that hard in my life.”
“Same,” Jinu says, strangled. His arms look like they’re trembling as he continues to hold himself up, not letting his full weight collapse on top of her.
“Same?” Rumi arches a brow and snickers. “That’s all you can say?”
He laughs. “Yeah, because I think my brain just got knocked halfway across the room.”
Both of them giggle, still high from the rush, as he pulls out and rolls off to the side, panting. Rumi struggles to catch her breath too, feeling like she’s just run a marathon. Her legs and abdomen ache in the best way, and she could stay in this feeling forever. She glances over at him, drinking in the sight of his chest moving up and down, taking comfort in yet more proof that he is alive, and here, and hers. He catches her staring and smiles, shifting closer to wrap his arms around her.
They have to adjust a bit to get comfortable, ending up with Jinu’s head pillowed on her chest while she cards her hand through his hair. “I love you,” he murmurs.
Rumi’s heart has never been fuller. “I love you, too,” she replies softly, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.
She doesn’t know how long they stay like that, only that it must be a good while, because she starts to shiver a bit as her body cools down. Jinu runs a hand up and down her arm as goosebumps break out over her flesh.
“We should probably clean up, right?” he asks.
“Later,” she insists. “I’m tired.” No wonder, given what he’s just done to her. It’s probably what being hit by a train would feel like, if the train was extremely hot and knew exactly where the clit was. She leans up to grab at the blanket that’s hanging half-off the bed, pulling it over the both of them before snuggling back into his embrace.
Jinu blinks. “But we’re both—”
“Nope, not moving,” she says. “Stay with me.” She wraps her arms around him tighter for emphasis. However gross or sticky she may feel in the morning, she couldn’t care less about it now. Right now, everything is warm and safe and wonderful, and she’ll hold onto it for as long as possible.
He laughs. “Alright, you win.” Then he kisses her again, all love and devotion and promise. “I’m staying. Always.”