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Steve was nervous, more nervous than he’d ever been in his entire life. And that was saying something. He’d managed to get himself into compromising situations time and time again, but this? This was new.
“Steve, stop it,” Natasha said, smirking at him in the mirror. Steve was sitting down, facing the mirror while she styled his hair for him, something about making it look sexy.
“Right, sorry,” Steve replied, biting his bottom lip, “I don’t know why I’m nervous. I mean we’ve done this, been out, you know. On dates and stuff, Bucky loves that restaurant in the town where they have music every night and we’ve been dancin’, not that I’m any good, and we’ve been to the movies and to that art gallery up by the hills, it’s beautiful and we’ve been travellin’ and sight seein’ –
“Steve,” Natasha laughed, her eyes were light and the smile on her lips seemed to ease Steve’s racing heart, “you’re rambling.”
“Right,” Steve said, grimacing, “what’s wrong with me?”
Natasha smirked, “many things.”
“Nat,” Steve scowled, rolling his eyes, “c’mon I’m serious.”
Natasha sighed and then squeezed his shoulders, “you’re nervous because this is different.”
“How do you know that?”
“Clint told me.”
Steve sighed, blushing, “how does Clint know that?”
“He heard you talking about it,” she shrugged as if it didn’t mean anything at all.
“When did he hear me talkin’ about it?” Steve asked, confused and then groaned, realising that when he’d been pacing this morning, about whether or not to ask for Natasha’s help, Clint had overheard. He was after all, Hawkeye and somehow managed to hear everything, despite needing to use a hearing aid.
“It’s all right Steve,” Natasha smiled, this time softer, “this is Bucky.”
“I know,” Steve mumbled, looking down at his hands, “what if he doesn’t want me?”
Natasha looked at Steve in the mirror and gave him her best, ‘what the fuck?’ look, “he’s crazy about you. Steve, he loves you. It’ll be all right.”
Steve smiled, blushing, “I love him.”
“I know,” Natasha smirked, “heard you say it a lot at night.”
Steve sat up, alarmed and red in the face, “but we haven’t even…what? Oh my God, that’s so bad –
“Calm down, Steve,” Natasha laughed, holding him still, “I was only joking. But now I know you’re a grandpa who’s never had sex.”
Steve ducked his head and grumbled, “I hate you.”
Natasha smiled softly, kissing Steve’s temple, “whatever you say, Rogers.”
Steve tried to hide his smile, but couldn’t help squeezing the redhead’s hand, “thanks Nat.”
-*-
The man in the mirror had light blue eyes, soft like the summer sky and deep like the ocean; flecks of green twinkled at night and seemed to make them shine all the more brighter. He had rosy cheeks, a strong jaw and red lips, golden-blond hair and a soft smile. If anyone were to see him, they’d think nothing could possibly make him nervous. Captain America, the hero, now turned criminal in the eyes of the government, couldn’t have anything to make him scared, right? No. In fact, there were many things that worried him and one of them was taking this step.
He hadn’t told Bucky what he wanted to do. He didn’t know if he’d agree. But that didn’t stop the butterflies fluttering in his stomach.
Natasha had made his hair look neater than usual, but messy at the same time. Almost like he’d just ran his hands through it, and it looked like that. He was wearing jeans and a casual jumper, with a pair of chukka boots. He was pacing again, like he was a teenager and about to go into an exam.
“Stevie?” Bucky’s voice came from outside their bedroom door, “you ready to go?”
“Yeah,” Steve replied, looking at himself one more time, before opening the door. Steve had been locked in their room, getting ready while Bucky had already dressed and was hanging out with Natasha.
Bucky looked wonderful. He always did. His hair was tousled as always, pushed back but not slicked or jelled. A lot like the styles men had these days and Steve knew Natasha had helped him with it; his eyes were light, looking into Steve’s with such love it was hard to look away. He was wearing black jeans, combat boots and a white t-shirt with a jacket pulled on top. Steve felt those butterflies again.
“Stevie,” Bucky smiled and pulled him close by his hips, pressing a soft kiss on the latter’s lips. They were roughly the same height, but Steve still felt smaller around him and to be honest, he quite liked how thick and beefy Bucky was, especially when he held him like this, strong arms around his waist, body pressed against his own.
“Hi,” Steve blushed, arms wrapped around Bucky’s neck, “you look…real good Buck.”
Bucky smirked and nudged his nose against Steve’s, “it’s all for you, baby.”
Steve ducked his head, looking at Bucky from underneath his eyelashes, mumbling, “my Bucky.”
Bucky chuckled and nuzzled Steve’s cheek, “that’s right, sweetheart.”
Steve smiled and Bucky took his hand, letting the latter lead the way. They were going out into town for the night, Steve didn’t know what Bucky had planned, it was all a surprise but he was pretty sure Natasha had helped him plan it.
“How are we gettin’ there?” Steve asked as they walked out of T’Challa’s place, “by motorbike?”
Bucky grinned and handed Steve a helmet for the newly fashioned motorbike parked just outside, “T’Challa fixed me with a new one.”
“I don’t need a helmet, Buck,” Steve rolled his eyes, trying to hand it back to Bucky.
Bucky raised his eyebrow, “put it on, Steve.”
“But –
“Nope,” Bucky shook his head, “put it on. Just because you’re all super soldier now, doesn’t mean you’re invincible.”
Steve grinned and sighed, “so, where’s yours?”
Bucky smirked, “I was the freakin’ Winter Soldier, I don’t need a helmet.”
“But –
Bucky just shook his head and laughed, getting onto the bike and said, “c’mon Stevie, we’ll be late.”
Steve grumbled but did as he was told and climbed on behind Bucky, wrapping his arms around Bucky’s waist, resting his head on his boyfriend’s broad back, “you’re a jerk.”
“Punk,” Bucky grinned and started up the motorbike, kicking off and began zooming into the secret, beautiful town. Steve smiled, his boyfriend may be an overprotective bum, but he loved him all the same.
-*-
They ended up near the hilly areas of the town, near the ancient caves where crystals shone under the moonlight and small pools grew in holes, like underwater entrances to the ocean. Steve had never been here before, but Bucky led him in with ease, taking his hand after parking and within a few minutes they were in a brightly lit cave with candles floating, no doubt spelled that way by Wanda. There was a blanket laid out and food, with the moonlight sending down white rays of light.
“Buck,” Steve whispered, awestruck, “you didn’t have to do all of this.”
Bucky smiled and kissed Steve’s cheek, “but I wanted to.”
Steve ducked his head and followed Bucky, sitting them both down on the soft blanket. On impulse, Steve lay back and looked up at the moon, sighing happily.
“It’s beautiful,” he whispered, looking over at Bucky, taking his metal hand and kissed his knuckles, “thank you, Buck.”
Bucky leaned over and kissed Steve’s forehead, “you hungry?”
Steve laughed, “when am I not?”
-*-
The date went by with laughter and reminiscing, eating food that tasted like little bites of heaven. Soon the two super soldiers were lying on their backs, looking up at the moonlit sky.
“You think God’s up there?” Steve asked after a brief pause. The taste of cake and alcohol made his stomach hum happily, and he felt so warm, sleepy and stuffed.
Bucky shrugged and turned to Steve, “don’t think so anymore.”
“Me too,” Steve sighed, still staring at the stars, “stopped believin’ a while ago.”
“What made you stop?” Bucky asked, taking Steve’s hand, rubbing circles into his skin with his thumb.
“The war,” Steve said, eyes wide and blue, “mum’s death…dad’s, my sickness…all the crap that happened back then, Hitler, Hydra. Just didn’t seem…if there was a God, why would he or she put us through this? I really stopped altogether after…”
“After what?” Bucky asked, squeezing Steve’s hand.
Steve turned his face to look at Bucky, the blue in his eyes meeting the darker, grey flecked blue orbs of the brunette’s and he wondered how he ever woke up without seeing those eyes.
“When you fell,” Steve replied, his voice was quiet, soft. There were tears in his eyes but he couldn’t bring himself to look away. Bucky looked at him with such love and adoration, it made Steve’s heart swell. The brunette cupped Steve’s face and wiped away the tears there, kissing his forehead.
“I’m here now,” Bucky whispered and then pressed his lips against Steve’s.
Steve opened up for him immediately, moaning softly into the kiss. Bucky’s lips moved over his effortlessly, as if kissing him was as easy as breathing. Steve felt his head swarming with thoughts and wishes, all of which were granted as soon as Bucky’s lips were on his, the warmth in his chest spread throughout his body, keeping him here, in this moment. Bucky opened his mouth, sucking Steve’s bottom lip and licked his way into the blond’s welcoming mouth, tasting the cake and drink on his tongue.
Soon, Steve was breathless, hands running through Bucky’s hair, down his shoulders. He tugged at his boyfriend until Bucky moved on top of him, bracketing his head with his arms, kissing him in earnest. This kiss was heavier, desperate, hungry, Steve whined against Bucky’s lips when the latter pulled away.
“Stevie,” Bucky whispered, voice deep and husky, beginning to litter Steve’s neck with kisses, “oh, God, Stevie.”
“Buck,” Steve replied, sighing when Bucky began to leave open mouthed kisses along his skin, leaving love bites in his wake, “please. I want…”
“What do you want, baby?” Bucky asked, breathless, nipping at Steve’s earlobe, grinding his hips against Steve’s, both of them hard against each other.
“You,” Steve moaned, eyes shut tight when Bucky’s right hand moved down to grip his hip, keeping their bodies pressed against each other’s.
“I’m right here,” Bucky said, kissing Steve’s forehead, his eyelids, his cheeks, the bridge of his nose and finally his lips, rocking their hips together in the process.
Steve whimpered and spread his legs further, letting Bucky settle between them, taking Bucky’s right hand in his own, moving it down his body, over his crotch, “Buck, please.”
Bucky drew back from Steve’s lips and looked down at his boyfriend. Steve’s eyes were hazy and half lidded, he looked up at Bucky with naked adoration, making him feel like he was dreaming.
“Are you sure?” Bucky asked, cupping Steve’s jaw, “we don’t need to do anythin’ you don’t wanna.”
“I want to,” Steve said firmly, “I want it to be you. And want you to want to.”
Bucky smiled softly, “oh baby, you got no idea how much I want you.”
Steve laughed breathlessly, “I think I can feel that against my thigh, jerk.”
“Punk,” Bucky replied fondly, nipping Steve’s bottom lip, “you really sure, Stevie?”
“Yes,” Steve replied, nudging his nose up against Bucky’s chin, “wanna be yours…in every way.”
Bucky growled at that and pressed his lips against Steve’s again, kissing the breath right out of him, until they were both panting and warm cheeked, bodies hot and sweaty against each other’s.
“You have...?” Bucky trailed off, leaning down to pepper Steve’s flushed chest, because somewhere along the way, Steve’s jumper had come off as had Bucky’s shirt and jacket.
“Yeah,” Steve groaned, “s’in my pocket.”
Bucky smirked against Steve’s chest, nipping at his right nipple, while playing with the other, rubbing it between his fingers, “you came prepared, baby doll?”
Steve moaned and arched into Bucky’s mouth and hand, “…fuck me, Barnes.”
“Gettin’ to that, sweetheart,” Bucky chuckled, kissing down the length of Steve’s muscled chest and lean stomach, admiring the dips and curves of his baby’s body, the way he was tight and small, despite being bigger than he had been. He loved the difference in their bodies, where Bucky was bulky and large, Steve though built, was compact and that tiny, bitty waist, that Bucky just loved so much.
“Buck,” Steve sighed, running his hands through Bucky’s hair, tugging lightly when his boyfriend’s big hands pressed on his hips possessively, sucking marks down his stomach, leaving a trail.
“You’re so beautiful,” Bucky groaned, “so fuckin’ beautiful Stevie. God, you drive me crazy, you know that? I’d die without you Stevie, fuckin’ die without you baby.”
Steve gasped, arching against Bucky’s mouth, eyes squeezed shut, “Buck, I love you. Never have to be without me again, loveyouloveyouloveyou.”
Bucky smiled and looked up at Steve sincerely, “I love you too.”
Steve looked down at him, dazed, “do you still wanna?”
“That’s my question,” Bucky smirked but nodded all the same, “do you?”
“Please,” Steve whimpered, throwing his head back, the moonlight hitting his body, like an angel for Bucky’s eyes, only for his eyes.
Bucky quickly opened up Steve’s jeans, slipping him out of his shoes and socks, ridding him of the jeans, before shedding his own, until they were both just in their boxers.
“Fuck,” Bucky cursed, leaning over Steve, pressing their foreheads together, “you’re perfect, Stevie.”
Steve blushed and spread his legs again; letting Bucky between them and mouthed the latter’s jaw, “take me Buck, please.”
Bucky groaned, kissing down Steve’s bitten neck, “fuck baby, you’re drivin’ me insane.”
Then they were kissing again, hard and hungry, Steve’s arms wrapped around Bucky’s neck and their dog tags clinked together, Bucky wearing Steve’s and Steve wearing Bucky’s, hot, sweaty skin touching, melding them together, hushed words spoken against lips in the evening light. And then, oh then, Bucky freed them of their last piece of clothing and then Steve was seeing stars.
Bucky took it slowly, took his time making sure Steve was ready, no matter how much he whined and begged for him to hurry up. He started by slicking Steve’s fluttering hole, making sure that this experience was as painless as possible for Steve, before slicking his fingers (of flesh and blood, he wanted this to feel as natural as possible), easing into Steve.
“Oh,” Steve gasped, strained, eyes unseeing and hazy, “oh, Buck…”
Bucky took a deep breath, willing himself to keep it slow, making this last for the both of them, especially because this was Steve’s first time ever. Something stirred in Bucky, something possessive, knowing that only he got to see Steve like this. He leaded down and kissed Steve’s lips, swallowing his moans when he slipped a second finger into him, groaning at the sensation of Steve’s body, hot and tight. He worked his fingers in slowly, feeling the muscles around them contract and flutter, opening up for Bucky after a little struggle. Steve’s legs fell open wider and he rocked back against the fingers in him and up, trying to gain friction for his aching cock.
“That’s it baby,” Bucky whispered, making Steve look up at him, “just relax sweetheart. You’re doin’ so well, bein’ so good for me Stevie.”
There were tears in Steve’s eyes and he pulled Bucky down to kiss him again, as the latter curled his fingers, rubbing against that sweet buddle of nerves, that spot that made Steve’s entire body light up.
“Buck, oh, oh, oh,” Steve gasped against Bucky’s lips, grinding up against his boyfriend and back down on the fingers thrusting in and out of his body, “please, more, please.”
Bucky grunted and nipped Steve’s jaw, easing another slick finger into Steve, groaning loudly at how responsive Steve was – he arched and whined, rocking back harder against the three fingers now working him open, curling every so often to hit that spot over and over.
“Oh baby,” Bucky whispered, “oh fuck, you’re so…fuck, so tight sweetheart. Stevie, baby doll, let me make love to you.”
“Buck, please, fuck me,” Steve begged, eyes wide, staring up at Bucky, “please, I wanna come with you in me, please, please oh –
“There you go, baby,” Bucky growled, voice deep and strained, sucking Steve’s earlobe, “just relax, sweetheart. I gotcha, I gotcha, there’s a good boy.”
Steve’s entire vision seemed to white out as Bucky’s fingers withdrew and something bigger, thicker and fuck did that feel so good, slid into his body. Now, Bucky’s hands moved to grip Steve’s hips, spreading the blond’s legs wider, lifting them up, so that they wrapped around the brunette’s broad back.
Steve moaned, gasping breathlessly as Bucky bottomed out, easing in bit by bit, “Buck, fuck, you’re…you’re…oh, oh –
Bucky stilled and waited for Steve to settle. His eyes were closed and his mouth was open, breathing against Bucky’s lips, absolute bliss spread out on his features. Bucky felt so protective and possessive over the man below him, not wanting anyone to ever take him from him again.
“I love you, Stevie,” Bucky growled, “I love you so much, baby.”
Steve could hardly contain himself. He wanted to let go, to let the waves drag him under but he wanted this to last. And fuck, Bucky was big, thick and filling, Steve felt like he was being full of too much all at once. He loved that though, he wanted that always.
“Love you too, Buck,” Steve whimpered, clenching around Bucky, “please, move, Buck. I’m ready.”
Bucky pressed a hot, open mouthed kiss on Steve’s lips, dirty and possessive, beginning to move slowly inside Steve. He started off gentle, easing out of Steve and back in, groaning at the sensation of finally being inside Steve. He’d dreamed about this, thought about this, but nothing compared to the real thing.
Steve was incredible.
“You’re amazin’,” Bucky murmured into Steve’s neck, “so damn good, baby.”
Steve clawed at Bucky’s back, tightening his legs around Bucky, locking his feet together, pressing his heels into the meaty flesh of his boyfriend’s ass, “harder, Bucky, harder.”
Bucky wasn’t going to last much longer and neither was Steve. Drawing back to take Steve’s hands, he linked them with his own and held them above the blond’s head. He began snapping his hips faster, grinding in deep before easing back and then thrust in hard.
Steve’s mouth opened in a silent scream, squeezing Bucky’s hands as the latter began to pound into him, keeping his thrusts hard, deep and fast, brushing against Steve’s prostate with every snap of his hips.
“Yeah, baby,” Bucky purred, kissing Steve’s open mouth, growling when something primal began to take over and he rocked into Steve at a pace and strength that neither of them would have been able to take before the serum and the war.
“Buck,” Steve whined, gasping as Bucky’s relentless thrusts continued, hitting that spot every time, “Buck, oh, oh, oh, Bucky, oh. Keep…there, there Buck, please!”
“You’re an angel, sweetheart,” Bucky husked, snapping his hips and grinding in deep, “fuckin’ angel. So sweet, so good, baby, fuck you’re so good, Stevie. Come for me, come on baby, that’s it come for me.”
Steve’s back arched off the blanket and a broken sob left his lips, tears wetting his cheeks at how high he felt, how utterly loved he felt, and allowed the waves to pull him down. All he could see was white; he was floating, coming between the two of them as Bucky continued to thrust into him.
He’d never felt this before. It was like floating and falling at the same time, that adrenaline rush you feel right before you take a dive, or jump on a rollercoaster, it was like that and then letting go, like something bursting from his chest. His body went taut and it seemed to go on forever, the pleasure he felt was indescribable and he was pretty sure he was repeating Bucky’s name over and over.
When he came to, Bucky was looking down at him in awe, unable to fathom the affect he had on Steve, “baby, baby doll, Stevie, are you okay?”
“Buck,” Steve whimpered, seeking a kiss which Bucky was more than happy to give as he thrust once, twice and then he was spilling into Steve, groaning at how fucking good it felt.
“Oh, baby, baby,” Bucky whispered, “oh God, baby. You’re so amazin’, Steve, love you, doll. I love you.”
Steve looked up at him, dazed and smiled squeezing Bucky’s hands, “I love you too.”
Bucky rested his forehead against Steve’s, pressing his body on the latter’s as they both caught their breath, “that was incredible.”
Steve grinned, chest heaving, still full of Bucky and well kissed, yeah, it was pretty incredible. Bucky nuzzled Steve’s neck and sighed happily, knowing that for Steve, that was worth the wait.