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Kanaya sat in her pile of cushions, shielding the screen of her husktop from the glare of the sunlight streaming through her windows. She had just closed another exhausting conversation with Vriska. Every time they spoke, Vriska felt a little more distant, despite the progress Kanaya had made with her as her moirail. She had convinced Vriska long ago to give up her addiction of breaking black oracles, and she liked to think that she had helped her work through many of the small issues that had plagued her previous crew. All things considered, they were doing better than Kanaya had expected, what with her logical conscription on Alternia working in the caverns of the mother grub and Vriska’s exciting adventures as an intergalactic pirate.
And yet, every conversation hurt a little more than the last, and it was becoming nearly unbearable. No matter how many times she told herself it wouldn’t work between them any other way, no matter how firmly or how rationally she repeated the fact, she had never forgiven herself for failing to tell Vriska about her redder feelings. She knew it would be pointless to bring it up now. After Newkon’s appearance, it had quickly become clear to Kanaya that she was not on Vriska’s radar for the flushed quadrant, and after his death, she couldn’t even think about broaching the subject of matespritship. She still remembered the conversation in which Vriska had poured out her grief. She knew Vriska hadn’t meant to let show as much as she did. Vriska had been complaining about her arrangements with Terezi and they had gotten on the subject of her old crew. One thing had led to another and Vriska had let it all spill out in a passionate rant, nearly incoherent for all the 8’s embedded in the words. She had logged off immediately afterwards, leaving Kanaya to sit in the tense aftermath, suffering from her own emotional loss alone.
What could she hope to do about it now? Vriska had left her behind, and that was the way it had to be. She had known all along that it was her fate as a jade blood to remain on Alternia while the rest of her friends flew into space with the other budding adults. She should have known to confess her feelings before Conscription Day. Maybe then she would have had a slim chance. Now, she had nothing, and Vriska was picking up new lovers like any dashing pirate could be expected to do.
Sighing, she closed her husktop and stood up. She didn’t react as her clothing changed abruptly. Moving to the window, she looked out on her beautiful, luscious lawn, allowing the warmth of the sun’s rays to sooth her. She would have to go out to feed soon, before the sun set and she was forced to return to the mother grub’s caverns for the night.
At least this was right, she thought, smiling slightly. She had gotten her wish to live the romantic and intriguing life of a rainbow drinker, basking in the daylight and feasting on the colorful blood of hapless young trolls. She felt the stirring of bright passions inside her battling against her heavy melancholy. Yes, a nice feeding would do her good.
She changed into some more practical clothes and made her way downstairs. As she emerged into the daylight, she saw something glinting in the sky, flying towards her. She paused, waiting for Aradiabot to land.
“How was your night?” she asked.
“It was okay,” Aradia replied. “How was yours?”
She smiled and shrugged. “I was talking with Vriska. She and Terezi have officiated their kismesissitude.”
“Have they?”
“Are you surprised?” Kanaya asked, taken aback by Aradia’s interest in the gossip.
“No. But if that is the case, it is time to move forward.”
“Move forward?”
“Yeah,” Aradia said. “Tonight, I will retrieve Karkat and Nepeta. The ship I requested from Equius will arrive tomorrow. In a couple weeks’ time, we will join with Terezi and Vriska.”
“We will?” Kanaya asked. At a loss for a better response, she asked, “When was this decided?”
“It has always been decided.”
“Aradia, I respect your psychic ability to communicate with creepy voices, but I need more concrete answers. All of these things have already been arranged?”
“Not yet. But they will be. Perhaps you should take some time to prepare yourself mentally for your inevitable desertion of your responsibilities in the caverns.”
“Wait,” Kanaya said, pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration. “Aradia, you need to slow down for me. How can this happen? You don’t even know where Nepeta is, and what’s this about Karkat? Isn’t he dead?”
“Karkat is with Nepeta, and I do know where they are. I’ve known where they are for a long time now.”
“You what?” Kanaya asked, shocked. “But you’ve been searching for them for months! Haven’t you?”
“No. I found them, and then I let them be.”
“But why? Isn’t that why you came?”
“That’s why Equius sent me,” she said. “But it wasn’t time yet.”
“Time for what, Aradia?” Kanaya asked. “Please, help me understand you.”
“You won’t understand, so why bother?”
Kanaya sighed in frustration, crossing her arms. “Okay, at least tell me this. Why should I be preparing to leave my duties behind, and why are we going to rendezvous with Vriska and Terezi? I thought you were here to take Nepeta to Equius. In that case, there is no need for you to join with a pair of pirates and certainly no need for me to go with you.”
Aradia considered the question for a moment, clearly weighing the benefits of disclosing the information. Finally, she responded, “It is in preparation for the final revolution.”
“A revolution?” Kanaya repeated.
“Yeah,” Aradia said. “The final one. But that’s a secret until Karkat makes the announcement.”
“Aradia, I don’t think I’m prepared to take part in any revolutions,” Kanaya said. “Especially on so short a notice.”
“You will, though,” she said. “You have to. Your participation is prerequisite for its success. Or rather, it’s progression. Success is a rather relative term for our purposes.”
“Why?”
“We need you to hold us together.”
She grimaced. “Of course. Why didn’t I guess?” she said, sighing. “You want a mediator.”
“We need a mediator, Kanaya. Without you, everything will unravel before it even starts.”
“Perhaps I don’t want to be the mediator for once,” Kanaya retorted. “What do your voices have to say about that?”
“They don’t need to say anything,” Aradia said. “If nothing else, you will go to see Vriska. That’s me speaking, not them.”
Before Kanaya could respond, she floated upwards, and Kanaya had to look away as she flew before the blazing sun, disappearing over the horizon. She blinked, considering what she had said.
Aradia was right, of course. Because no matter how much Kanaya wanted to be something more than a meddler, as Vriska liked to put it, even meddling trumped nothing. She was tired of pining away by herself at the top of her tower. She was tired of staring at the words of her flushcrush on a screen but never seeing her in person. She was tired of kicking herself for missing her chance. And here, presented before her, was another chance she never thought she’d get, a chance to see Vriska, talk to her, and maybe even earn her concupiscent pity. If she had to be the resident meddler to right the mistake she’d made in ignoring her emotions, then so be it.
She turned around and went back inside. She would have to wait to terrorize young trolls later. She had a revolution to prepare for.