Chapter Text
Scalding hot water poured over the Mehrkuri twins, washing the filth of the day off and taking it down the drain. Steam filled the small shower room to the ceiling.
“Hey, Sid, you still got blood on our fringe.” Radian grabbed his twin by his chin, tilted his head. A smear of dried blood was hiding between two of the spikes, refusing to be washed away by the water, but it didn’t withstand the force of brotherly care and a washcloth.
“Hope that takes care of it.” Sidera shoved his brother’s hand away and stomped out of the shower. “I swear, if I find another blood stain on me thanks to you any time soon, I’ll disown you!” he called from the locker room.
Radian turned off the shower and walked after him, grinning.
“Was just doing my job. Should I’ve waited for that rookie merc to kill you or Pitne because you didn’t go out of the way” He took a towel from his locker and wrapped it around his waist. Sidera had turned his back towards him, while he was rubbing his crest and fringe dry. Radian’s eyes followed drops of water running down from his brother’s cowl over his spine. He stopped when he reached the sharp hips. The benefits of being twins - looking at the other meant nothing but checking a mirror from a unique angle. He was admiring himself, his own slim waist, sturdy skin the color of sand beginning where grey plates ended. It didn’t matter that the silent excuse had been worn thin over the years, he’d tell so himself for the rest of his life. There was no other choice.
“Don’t space out! Listen to me when I’m talking to you!”
Radian’s head jerked up. Air got caught in his throat and he coughed. His brother had turned around, frowning at him with a questioning look.
“Yeah, whatever.” Radian shrugged it off and pulled his casual clothes out of his locker. This was the second time this month that Sidera had caught him staring, he had to be more careful.
“I said, next time, give me a damn chance to step aside before you headshot somebody point blank with your fucking shotgun!”
“And I said, yeah, whatever,” he chuckled. To hell with it, to hell with their client Pitne. If any asshole tried again to wrestle Sidera down with a chokehold, he would never hesitate to put the barrel of his shotgun against the back of that asshole’s skull. He preferred his brother’s scowling over some blood and brain matter on his face over having to clean up Sidera’s blood.
They finished dressing in silence, stored their armor and uniforms away for the cleaning service to pick up, and left the locker room. Another long day was coming to its end.
“I’m aware you saved my life.” Sidera blinked against the low standing sun.
“Biotic vanguards are a pest.” He didn’t need to hear a thank you. Sidera had his own way to express his feelings, and it had gotten worse over the last few years, but Radian didn’t mind. They knew each other well enough to read the meaning from whatever words they chose to say. Sometimes, he worried that he admitted things between the lines he didn’t want Sidera to hear.
“Would have loved to see Pitne’s face. He almost fainted when he saw me,” Sidera laughed, and Radian joined.
“And you absolutely had to kneel down right in front of him, to ask if he’s okay!” The tension was gone for now. They continued to joke about the poor volus who had hired them as bodyguards on their way home.
The housing district for the working class of Nos Astra, the capital of Illium, was half an hour away from the factory and warehouse districts. On early summer days like this, they saved the money for a cab and walked. The evening sun warmed their scales and thick skin. A mild breeze brought the earthen scents of the planet’s surface, mixing it with the echoes of sky cabs and voices. The outskirts of the commercial district weren’t far away, and with the night approaching, the more shady nightclubs and red light establishments were awakening.
Their home was one more street crossing away, a tall building housing eighty small apartments. At the top floors, windows and the purple, metallic coating of the walls reflected Illium’s orange sun. Sidera searched his bag for his key card to the main entrance, when the faint beeping of their omni-tools informed them of an incoming call.
“It’s Ayinda.” Radian sighed and lowered his arm. “Can you take it? Mine’s having feedback issues.”
“Again? Told you to take it to a registered repair shop.”
“Yeah, yeah, and pay three times as much as the old thing is worth.” He grabbed Sidera’s arm and activated the omni-tool himself. A small screen appeared, lines flickering across it as a female voice began to talk.
“I was about to call Pitne For and ask if you guys are still alive! What took you so long? Do you think I have I have all day to wait for you to pick up a call?” the asari hissed, and despite the white noise distorting her voice, they could hear her tapping her pen against her desk.
“Hello, Ayinda, always a pleasure to hear your voice,” Sidera replied, dry as sand.
“Was kinda rough today, but no need to worry. What’s up, Ayinda?” Radian bothered with a friendlier tone. Their boss was impatient, but not a bad sort. She was the owner, CEO, and caseworker of a small temporary contract company that lent their indentured servants to subcontractors, against a price, of course. She did most of the work alone, and after working for her for nine years, he had gotten used to her tempers. Ayinda had always been fair to their family, he could forgive her some of her more irritating traits. Unlike his brother.
“I have a job on my desk, and you guys are perfect for it.” Her voice softened to a gentle, almost motherly tone. “It’s a night job,” she added.
Of course, what else, as if she called to ask how their day was. Radian sighed, Sidera rolled his eyes, giving a low growl.
“We don’t have another day off from the Pitne-job before next week. You said yourself that two jobs a day would have a negative effect on our abilities as bodyguards,” Radian reminded her, putting a hand over his twin’s mouth before he could bark his thoughts at their boss.
“I know my contracts, thank you very much. I wouldn’t ask you if the escort service hadn’t asked for you. You left a good impression the last time they hired you. Of course I’m aware that you aren’t legally obliged to take this assignment. But maybe we can negotiate a temporary agreement. One day extra vacation for every hour tonight?”
That didn’t sound too bad. If it was the same escort service that had booked them two months ago, they’d probably accompany two wealthy turian ladies or asari to dinner or a party. Fancy clothes and good food they didn’t have to pay for, in exchange of some pleasantries and friendly conversation. Usually, the show was over after four or five hours, which would mean four or five extra free days.
He looked at his brother - Sidera shook his head. Radian raised the plates above his eyes but shrugged.
“Sorry, Ayinda. It really was a tough day, and tomorrow’s starting early. Maybe next time.”
“Too bad, guess I have to find a good replacement.” Her words were heavy with disappointment, but she knew better than trying to talk them into something that wasn’t covered by their contract terms. Not for the first time, Radian wondered how much exactly other companies were paying her for their service. Good looking, with nine years of experience as indent servants under their belt but still young with their 25 years, he could imagine that their worth wasn’t too shabby. Too bad they only saw a small part of it.
“Ah, before I forget! The clinic called. You should go and see your father.”
“Is something wrong?” Sidera’s frown deepened, and his mandibles twitched.
“They’ve no business telling me. They only said you haven’t been there in a while, and that you should see him when you can. Do it, boys. You never know when, well…”
“We’ll go. Thanks, Ayinda.” This was one of the reasons why Radian liked and respected her. She never complained when the clinic used her as a contact or scolded them for ignoring or rejecting the clinic’s calls. It was silly of them, but it wasn’t always easy, and Ayainda not only knew that, she understood.
“Good. I’ll contact you when there’s anything new on my desk. Bye.”
So they’d hear from her in two or three days. There was always something new on her desk. There was always someone looking for some muscle or handsome faces in Nos Astra. The excitement over what was lying ahead of them once one job was finished had become old after the first few years, and they’d have to accept whatever she assigned them for, as long as it was within the terms of their contract.
*
Health was a great commercial good, sickness wasn’t. Hospitals, clinics of all kinds formed their own district away from the main trade and entertainment area. The money they saved before was spent for a cab to the T’Sina Memorial, an intensive care clinic for the incurably and terminally ill, and one of the few clinics away from Palaven specialized in treating the turian curse, Dilrum syndrome.
“I can go alone if you don’t want to come. I’ll call you if it’s bad.” Radian watched his brother’s face with worry. Sidera had always been calmer than him, over the last one or two years, he had begun to withdraw himself more and more from the world around them, and lately, also from Radian. There was no hope for their father’s condition. They were forced to watch as it only worsened over the years, and sometimes he wondered if it would have been better for Sidera if he had insisted on visiting more frequently. The inevitable was awaiting them, whether they were ready for it or continued to run away.
“Bullshit. Come, the sooner we go, the sooner we can leave.”
“Sid.” He put a hand on his brother’s arm, but Sidera jerked away from him.
“Spirits, stop touching me, dammit!” he hissed, hugging his own arm to protect himself from his brother coming closer again.
“I… I’m sorry…” Staggering backward, Radian raised his hands. He was familiar with Sidera’s sudden outbursts, they were his way to get rid of stress, they were rare, short, sometimes violent, but never against him. Until now. If Sidera was sensing what Radian wasn’t willing to admit even to himself… he had to be more careful.
“No, my fault. I didn’t mean it. It’s just…” Sighing, he rubbed his neck, staring at the ground.
“It was a hard day, and this is never easy, I know.” Radian smiled at him. He wanted to say more when Sidera nodded, but he forgot the words when Sidera’s fingers brushed over his, as though he wanted to hold his hand. The moment passed, and Sidera walked ahead, towards the clinic’s entrance. Radian, telling himself to be satisfied that he wasn’t rejected as a brother, followed him.
“If it isn’t my boys! Coming all the way to see their old man!” Tedor Mehrkuri stood up from his comfortable chair at the window to greet them. He stretched out a trembling hand to welcome them. Crutches under both his arms helped him to stand, but didn’t camouflage the limping. Both feet had fallen victim to the Dilrum syndrome a decade ago and had been replaced with prosthetics. The wounds on his arms where the disease had eaten away the smaller plates and scales had healed well, covering his dark skin with white spots. A wide scarf around his shoulders covered the holes in the cowl.
The artificial plates that replaced half of his face were new.
“Come! Have a seat! Can I get you a drink?” He waved them over and pointed at the two simple chairs standing next to a small table. He limped over to the small fridge standing between his chair and his bed while his sons were sitting down.
“They won’t give me anything else but juice and water. You should’ve come next week. Santes’ granddaughter sometimes smuggles wine or beer in when she visits him. Ah, I’ve to call a nurse to bring two glasses!” He winked at them, putting a bottle of water on the table. Radian jumped up, put a hand on his father’s shoulder, and steered him back to his chair.
“It’s okay, dad, we can drink from the bottle. We don’t mind sharing.” With a smile, he gently pushed his father down.
“Of course you don’t. You never did. You always got along, hardly ever argued, and took care of each other. You made your silly father’s life a lot easier. Thanks, Radian.” He took the glass filled with juice from his son’s hand, giving him a grateful smile. Radian returned to his chair. Leaning forward, he folded his hands between his legs, waiting for his father to talk. Sidera’s talons were tapping on the table while he stared out of the window. The sun had almost set, painting clouds and skyscrapers in the purple and pink colors of dusk. The air conditioning was humming. Voices from people strolling through the park outside were reaching them, and somebody was rushing down the corridor.
“Are you well?” Radian finally broke the silence, letting out a sigh of relief when his father shook his head.
“Not worse than usual. They take good care of me. The doc changed my medication three weeks ago. I’m hardly in pain anymore since then.” His good mandible dropped and he lowered his head. “I have a few more years. I’m sorry.”
“What, are you saying we’re only waiting for you to finally kick the bucket?” Sidera’s flat hand slammed on the table.
“Sid!” Radian rose from his seat, but their father smiled.
“All is fine. Good to hear your voice, my boy. Last time you didn’t say more than hello and goodbye. You gotta let your anger out once in awhile, or it will eat you away. No pun intended.” He chuckled, pointing at his mutilated face. While half of it was still there, it didn’t look well.
The plates around his eyes were sagging, the tissue looked brittle, as though they’d fall off if touched. The artificial half lacked texture and didn’t match the color, it was a purely functional replacement to protect the flesh underneath and allow him to breathe and eat.
Nobody had bothered to add the face markings. Not that it would have mattered. Unlike his sons’ purple markings that identified them as citizens of Nos Astra, his were white, and wouldn’t have been visible on the artificial, white plates anyway. Only the stripe on the chin and the two on his good mandible remained, and even they had become faint. It was hard to look at him.
“I’ll talk with the doctor about better prosthetics. I’m sure something can be arranged.” Radian roughly calculated the numbers in his head. Serving Ayinda for three more years or so, it didn’t make a big difference to him.
“Forget it, I’ll never agree to that!” the old man snapped back with an intensity that matched Sidera’s. “Not for the few years I’ve left. And they’ve to be replaced every other month anyway. I’m already a burden to you as it is, I won’t make it worse!”
“Dad, you know that the terms of our contract cover-”
“Cover basic, functional needs, yes. And that’s more than enough. Look at me, Radian. I’m dying. I can hardly walk. I’m not going anywhere from here except to my grave. My mistakes and my health have sold you into slavery, I’m not making it worse as it is because of some fancy accessories! Your mother would never forgive me! And it will already take at least half of Eternity for the things I screwed up in the past.” His anger died away as suddenly as it had come. He looked at the framed photo standing on top of his fridge. It showed his younger self-standing next to a young turian woman. She was tall, taller than their father. They had inherited heir height and her pale, green eyes. Hers were glowing with happiness and she smiled at her husband, despite her dangerously large belly.
“The only picture of all of us together. She was aware of the risk, but she wanted you so much. She made me promise to take care of you and raise you to be happy, strong men. And free. Now look what I’ve done. Shoved my debts onto you, and the hospital bills…” His hands were shaking more than usual when he reached for the picture and picked it up.
“Dad…” Sideras groaned, but Radian gestured him to be silent. They’ve heard the story so many times that he had lost count, but along with the photograph, it was all they ever knew about her and all that their father had left.
“Women like her are rare, especially on Omega. That she’d take a weakling like me… She was smart, pretty, strong. Could have lived an easy life as a freelance merc, but no, not Leredin. She was too honest, too proud. She’d rip off the rest of my face if she knew…” He laughed and put the photograph back in its place.
“Fuck it, could you just stop joking, you selfish fool?” Sidera jumped up, clenching his hands into fists, his mandibles were trembling. “You selfish idiots just had to fall in love and fuck, had you? And for what? Leaving us with the guilt of killing her, and because that’s not enough, we’re working our asses off to pay off your debts because you coward ran away, and got the nerve to get sick! We’re poor, screwed slaves, and you’re dying a painful death. Yeah, just too funny! Hope it was worth it!” With a sneer of disgust, Sidera turned around and stomped towards the door.
“Wait! Don’t you dare…!” Radian leaped from his seat and after him, but Tedor called him back.
“Let him go. He won’t listen to anyone now.” Tedor sighed, and, to Radian’s surprise, smiled with gentle understanding. “He’ll feel horrible once he calmed down, he’ll need all your comfort then.”
“Father, what he said-”
“What he said wasn’t half as bad as the things I’ve called myself since I fled from Omega’s debt collectors while the nurses still prepared your mother for her eternal rest. And unlike me, he doesn’t mean it. Radian, please be honest with me.” His voice changed, suddenly sounding tired with age and the pain of regret, like his blue eyes.
“Is Ayinda good to you? Are you two happy, at least a bit?”
“She’s not exploiting us. She’s stubborn, demanding when it’s about work, and certainly not spoiling us. But she’s honest, and the work we do is as well, although dangerous sometimes.” The second question wasn’t as easy to answer.
They weren’t wealthy, and wouldn’t be well off as long as they couldn’t negotiate their own terms, which wouldn’t be before they turned 30. Five more years. They didn’t have much, but they weren’t poor, as Sidera liked to claim. They had a home, small, but with everything they needed. They had enough food, clothes, and their contract also included medical care and regular check-ups.
In case that Dilrum syndrome broke out in them it would be discovered early enough to be treated, with good chances to be cured.
They did honest work, as they would if they were free, and they didn’t have to worry to be involved in illegal businesses or to be shipped outside Nos Astra. Also, they didn’t have to worry about their father. The contract bound Ayinda to take care of the bills until his death.
If he thought about it, life wasn’t too bad. Yes, they’ve never known their mother, and their father was terminally ill, that sucked. But for now, he was alive, and they wouldn’t lose him anytime soon. He and his twin were healthy, and, considering the circumstances, leading a normal life, maybe more normal than it would have been if they hadn’t decided to sell themselves to Ayinda’s company.
And they were together. They worked together, lived together, spent their free time together. Which used to be easier before he had been unable to tear his eyes away from his sleeping brother when harmless touches or hearing his voice too close to his ear didn’t use to send shudders down his spine.
“We’re doing fine, dad. We’ve got what we need, not many things to worry, and we’re not alone. Work’s sometimes more, sometimes less fun, and damn tiring most of the time. Things could always be better, but they aren’t bad. Sidera is moody today, but I tell you he knows how to enjoy himself. We both do,” he finally said. With the scene his brother had made, a euphoric lie about how happy and free of sorrows they were too calm his father’s worries wouldn’t have been believable. But there was no reason to paint their situation darker than it was. Maybe he wasn’t happy, but he was satisfied. His father couldn’t give him what he needed to be happy anyway. Sidera could, but...
“Thank you for being honest.” Tedor stood up, limped to the deserted chair and let himself fall onto the seat. He reached over the table and took Radian’s hand in his. “You’re good boys. Handsome. Smart. Coming after your mom. If you take care of each other, more than a hundred years are waiting for you once you’re free. You can still be everything. Become spacers. Or settle down with a mate. Although...” His voice dropped, his smile was sad, “it would be easier if you preferred men. I wish you to find a love like mine, but the DNA I cursed you with… I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry about that, neither of us plans to have a family.” Unable to meet his father’s eyes he looked down at the mutilated hand. His father didn’t have to worry about him, and he wished he could just tell him the truth. If Sidera had any plans of settling down with a wife and fathering children, then he had never mentioned it.
“You’ll do what’s right. Just take care of your brother, and remind him once in a while that you need him, too.” Tedor laughed, giving his son’s hand a pat. “Now go and tell him he’s loved and forgiven. And for the Spirits’ sake, call once in a while, or do I have to book a date with my own sons to see you more often?” He smirked when Radian stared at him in surprise and tensed.
“Dad! We’re not doing that kind of work!”
“Oh, you do! Don’t think I’m a fool!” The elderly man pointed an accusing finger at his son. “I heard you’re quite a hit with several host agencies. How far do you go?”
“Spirits, dad!” Groaning, Radian stood up. This wasn’t the kind of talk he wanted to have with his father of all possible people in the galaxy. “Women pay to show off handsome guys who can make a good impression, that’s all. Any other, eh, services cannot be demanded. How do you know about that anyway?!”
“I’m your father, it’s my job to know what my boys are up to!” his voice scolded, but his eyes sparkled with humor. “And that’s good. Sex work is hard, and I’d have hated if a contract forced you to do it.”
“We aren’t forced to do anything like that, don’t worry, dad. Can we change the topic?” Radian could only guess how their father had found out about their host job, but he didn’t really want to know. Uncomfortable as he was talking about this line of work with his father, or his sex and love life in general, he was glad to see that it had put his father into a good mood.
“Is there something you need? Something I can do or get for you?”
“Yes. Get out of my room, find your brother and hug him. Right now, he needs you more than I do.”