Archive of Our Own

Rain pours over him with fervour as Matthew walks up the hill with slow steps. His clothes are soaked, but he stopped caring about it ten minutes ago. After being lectured at work for being late, sleeping on the bus and missing his stop, he thought his day couldn't get worse, but then the downpour came as soon as he started walking. 

Before he could even find a convenience store to take shelter or buy an umbrella, he's dripping wet. That's when he gave up and accepted it. It's a day where everything is supposed to go wrong. 

Once he finally arrives at the apartment complex, drenched and cold, Matthew pulls up his phone and texts his boyfriend again. The ones he sent earlier are still marked as unread, but he lets him know he's home. He's probably busy at work, that's why he couldn't reply a single text since morning. 

If he wasn't staring at his phone screen, he probably would've noticed the other person coming down the stairs. As it is, he bumps into someone's chest and falls back on his butt like a flat sack of potatoes. 

It hurts, and he's momentarily too shocked and embarrassed to look up, but once he does it's even worse. A handsome guy stares down at him with big worried eyes. He's wearing a very nicely cut fake leather jacket, black trousers and shirt. In a weird way, he looks so elegant it's almost out of place in this shabby building.

“Are you ok? I'm sorry, I was coming down the stairs too fast.” The man says, offering him a hand, and even his voice is charming. Matthew takes it, noticing the Rolex on his wrist. 

“Yeah, I'm fine. I was looking at my phone too, we're good.” Matthew chuckles awkwardly, trying not to grimace as he gets up and his back stings. 

He notices as he gets on eye level how actually handsome this guy is. His face is so symmetrical and delicate, it's like he's a drawing. Matthew looks down avoiding his eyes, and notices he left a big wet mark on his chest.

“Oh, I got you wet. I'm so sorry.” Matthews gasps, not knowing what to do, but the man just laughs and shakes his head.

“It's ok. I'm in a hurry, so since you're ok I'll get going.” The man nods and walks away without a second glance, leaving a intrigued Matthew behind. 

He doesn't think he's ever seen this guy around, he'd remember, maybe he's a new resident. It doesn't make much sense that someone with enough money to afford that look would live here, but Matthew himself shouldn't be here by that logic. 

It sounds like new gossip the ahjumma from 203 would know about, and he makes a mental note to ask her about it later. Now, his feet are getting sore from walking in the wet shoes for so long, so he just quickly makes his way up. 

The sour mood is almost leaving him as he opens the door to the apartment, the hope of a warm bath and a change of clothes looking like the best thing ever. However, instead of the neatly organised entryway he worked hard on, he finds everything upside down. 

The boxes and cabinets are all wide open, and as he hurriedly walks inside, he finds even more chaos. The whole house is messed up. Matthew runs to the bedroom to confirm his fear, the jewelry box on top of the drawer is empty. 

Before he hyperventilates, Matthew closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. It doesn't help much, and as he looks around again, he feels like crying. He's never been in a situation like this, and he's not sure what he's supposed to do next. 

First, he decides to call the police. As he does so, he walks out of the apartment, checking the hallway for anyone. The police tells him they're on the way and instruct him to find whoever works at the building security, so Matthew runs down the stairs again, still cold in his drenched clothes, and now with his heart racing like crazy from panic. 

It's a really long couple of hours in which he walks up and down with the security, then with the police. Matthew calls his boyfriend multiple times, but he doesn't answer. The register ends up staying in Matthew's name, despite the apartment not being his, and they ask him to make a list of missing things to bring over to the station later. 

It's already past nine once he finally gets back inside and the mess is waiting for him. His clothes have dried on him, he's starving, and he feels like he'll get a cold. However, there's no way he's doing anything in this mess, so Matthew starts cleaning. 

As he puts everything back on place, he starts taking notes of what's missing. The jewelry, the laptop, some of the silverware, the Rolex watch he gifted him… 

The watch. Could it be? There's no way, right? Sure, it looked like the same model, and that guy did have a large backpack, but… Matthew lets out a loud groan. He could've stopped him, but never in a million years he'd imagine a guy like that would be a criminal. Actually, maybe he's reaching and he just happened to have the exact same model…

In the middle of his breakdown, the door clicks open, making him jump up and run to the entryway. 

“What took you so long?!” Matthew whines as he runs to his boyfriend and hugs him. 

“Hey, what's going on?” Jiho chuckles, hugging him back. “My phone died, did you call me?”

“Only a thousand times.” Matthew sniffs, trying to hold back from crying because he knows Jiho hates it. “The house was robbed.” 

“What?” Jiho pulls back, looking at him with confusion, Matthew pouts.  

Jiho lets his eyes wander to the rest house, and horror dawns on him. 

“What the hell happened here?” Jiho gapes, letting go of him. 

“Someone came in, they took everything of value. This place was an even worse mess when I first got here.” Matthew follows him as he walks inside. “The cops left like an hour ago, but we're supposed to go over tomorrow with a list of missing things.” 

“Fuck.” Jiho suddenly pales, running to his bedroom and making a mess of everything Matthew had just organized. 

“Hey! Stop throwing things around!” Matthew tries to pull his arm, but Jiho ignores him. “What are you looking for?” 

“My laptop. Did they take my laptop?” Jiho frantically looks around, throwing the cover on the floor. 

“I think so. I couldn't find it.” Matthew nods.

“Fuck!” Jiho shouts and closes his eyes, taking a deep breath. 

“Calm down. The police said there’s no way the cameras wouldn't have caught something, I'm sure they'll find him.” Matthew tries to reach for him again, but Jiho avoids his touch and starts pacing around. 

“Were you here when it happened?” Jiho frowns. 

“No, I got here just past seven and it was like this.” Matthew shakes his head. 

“Didn't you say you'd be here earlier today?” Jiho exhales, frustrated. The reaction gets Matthew to freeze. 

“Yeah, but my boss didn't let me leave until I was done with-” 

“If you were here they wouldn't have targeted my place.” Jiho glares at him. 

“How was I supposed to know that?” Matthew scoffs, gaping at him in disbelief of his words. “I was actually happy we were having dinner together.” 

“Yeah, that's not happening.” Jiho rolls his eyes. “You should go. I need to be alone.” 

As he stands there with his dirty clothes and stomach rumbling, Matthew has to take several seconds to understand what his boyfriend is saying. 

“Are you kicking me out right now? I haven't eaten anything yet-” 

“I can't be around you right now. It's for your own good. I'm too stressed out, I'll end up being hurtful.” Jiho sighs, turning his back to him. 

“What are you even talking about? I'm not-”

“I'm not rich, Matthew. I have to think about all the plans I had, because now they're done for.” Jiho rubs his temple. “I really need to be alone.” 

“Let me just take a shower and change, I'll go-” 

“Just leave, Matthew. Please.” Jiho sighs, glancing over his shoulder. It hurts, but if he says that, Jiho will be even more disappointed. 

“Ok.” Matthew purses his lips.

“Thank you. I knew you'd understand.” Jiho gives him a nod. Not a kiss, or a hug, just a nod. 

As Matthew rides a cab home that night, humiliation takes a seat with him. 

-

“So, did the cops find anything?” Taerae asks as he munches on his food. 

“No. The cameras didn't catch any faces, that guy knew where they were. They just wrote down what I told them.” Matthew sighs. 

“And Jiho?” 

“He apologized.” Matthew bites his lips. “He said he was just out of it because he won't have money to replace everything, and sometimes he resents me for being rich. He said he's not proud of it, and he's trying to change.” 

“Uhm.” Taerae tongues his cheek. “And you accepted that apology?” 

“I did.” Matthew locks eyes with him for a second then sighs. “I know. He messed up, but he looked really sorry about it, and he's been very sweet to me ever since.” 

“You know what I think about this, so I'll just stop repeating myself.” Taerae exhales. 

“Yeah, tell me about your Guinea pig.” 

“Gladly.” 

Ever since he told his friend about the first time his boyfriend yelled at him, Taerae has been of the opinion Jiho is a piece of trash. Matthew doesn't believe that, since he's been with him for almost four years now. He knows his boyfriend like no one else, Jiho can get heated sometimes, but he'll always repair it. That's enough.

Matthew is almost getting off work when a call from the police station changes all his plans. Fortunately, his boss allows him to leave an hour earlier, so he rushes after hearing they have crucial information on the case involving Jiho. 

As he arrives at the station, shaking with anxiety, Matthew keeps sending texts to Jiho that go unread. It seems to be a constant that he'll always be gone when Matthew needs to talk to him the most. 

The police officer that greets him in the station is not the same one he met before, this guy seems more serious and dedicated, which turns on an alarm for Matthew. Somehow, the vibes around it are not matching an update on a burglary case. 

“Matthew, we called you here today to ask you some questions regarding Son Jiho. You're familiar with him, correct?” The older detective asks. 

“Yes.” Matthew nods, glancing at the team obviously listening in while they pretend to look somewhere else. Something is terribly wrong about this. “This is not about the burglar case, is it? What's going on?” 

“It's related to the burglar case, but no, it's not exactly about it.” The detective sighs. “There's no easy way to say what I'm about to tell you.”

“Then just say it, please.” Matthew clenches his jaw, trying to prepare himself for whatever it is he's about to hear. Clearly, something happened to Jiho, and he needs to keep his cool to be helpful. 

“The thief returned the laptop he stole, it was delivered to the station last night.” The detective says, tone grave. 

“What? Why would he give just the laptop back?” Matthew frowns, extremely confused and with broken expectations. 

“You see, alongside it was a note telling us to check the hard drive.” The detective pauses, as if he knew Matthew wouldn't comprehend what he just said. 

Anything that comes next to words like that would never be in any of his wildest delusions. Matthew tries to open his mouth multiple times, but nothing comes out. All the questions he can think of don't look like they have answers he'd like to hear. 

As he looks up to the detective, it's like he's staring down at the edge of a cliff. Once he takes the step, he'll fall, but it doesn't really matter, he's going to be dragged anyway. Matthew takes a deep breath.

“What was in the hard drive?” Matthew asks with a shaky voice. The detective looks at him with pity before replying. 

“Hidden camera footage. From bedrooms, hotels, bar bathrooms.” A beat. “There were dozens of them, not only his own.”

Matthew’s stomach drops, he feels suddenly nauseous. The detective pushes on, voice flat.  

“We found transaction logs and passcodes to a private chatroom where this stuff was traded. They had specific tags and victims they targeted.” The detective sounds disgusted. “We're working on identifying everyone involved, so we ask you not to talk about it with anyone yet.”

“He…” Matthew gulps, closing his eyes for a moment to compose himself in front of the eyes staring at him. “Are you saying he filmed me without my knowledge?” 

“Yes. Multiple times.” The detective nods, solemn. “I'm sorry.”

“Are you sure that was his?”

“Yes. We're not done analysing all the evidence, but it's safe to say he was one of the leaders of this scheme.” 

Silence stretches as Matthew breaks and burns inside, stray tears breaking his blank face. Shame consumes him. They're talking about the man he had plans of flying to Canada to get married with. The man he loves and cherishes more than himself, that he trusts with his heart. They're saying he never even fucking existed. 

Unfortunately, the police officers don't really care that much about his feelings. They want his testimony, and every single bit of information they can get on Jiho. He speaks like a robot for the next hour or so, avoiding any thoughts related to anything, he just answers their questions. 

When they say he's free to go, Matthew isn't even sure where he's heading out to. Before he actually leaves, he manages to ask them the one thing he should've started with. 

“Are you going to arrest him?” Matthew asks after getting up, staring at the detective. 

“The warrant will be out by tonight, the prosecution has been taking cases like this seriously. We'll get him locked up, and I'll make sure it stays that way.” The detective nods. “If he tries to contact you in the meantime, call me immediately.” 

“Oh, ok.” Matthew is surprised again. He bows. “Thank you.” 

Thursday isn't a great day to find out his boyfriend is a criminal and pervert who'll be justly arrested. He still has to go to work tomorrow. 

-

A piece of him refuses to come back, even after a month has passed. Days fuse into one another in an endless cycle, while he pretends everything is fine. Life goes on, but he's not moving. 

It's also pretty hard to forget when people refuse to stop talking about it. If rumors helped dismantle vile schemes, the crime rate would've hit zero. As it is, words are just being used to hurt him more. 

Since Jiho and five other people were arrested for the chatroom, the case became hot on news and forums, and discussion about the topic has resurfaced. It's said groups like those are still circling around, and people are paying more attention to that. 

However, for Matthew personally, he hasn't been benefited by this discussion once. Instead, he had to quit his job because everyone in the building knew about his ex-boyfriend’s scandal, and what was done to him. His face was next to Jiho’s on a shady tabloid for a whole week.

It's been incredibly hard to find a new job, since now everyone knows his sexuality and his relationship history. Turns out even if people pretend they care about the victims, in reality they don't. He's heard more times than he could fathom possible in a civilized society that he's partially to blame, since he had sex. 

Last week, another victim reached out to him, saying she wanted to talk to someone who knew Jiho, because she had no idea who was the man that ruined her life. She didn't even know she'd been raped until the police identified her, they drugged her so she didn't remember a thing.

Everything gets worse every time something new comes out, so Matthew desperately wants to forget about it and move on. He's just not been allowed to do so yet. Also, the person that actually helped him is nowhere to be found, and he wonders about it too.

The doorbell ringing snaps him out of his loop, and Matthew lazily rolls off the bed to get the door. 

“I brought you kimchi my mom made.” Taerae raises the paper bag he's holding like it's an offering. 

“Thanks. Come in.” Matthew takes it and walks with him to the kitchen. “You don't have to keep coming to check on me. I'm fine.” 

“Who said I'm here to check on you?” Taerae scoffs. “I just have the perfect excuse to hang out at your fancy apartment now.” 

“Oh, so you just miss me?” Matthew coos, making a baby voice to tease him. 

“To be honest, yeah. It's been boring without you.” Taerae pouts. “I had lunch with Suho this week.” 

“Sucks to be you.” Matthew clicks his tongue.

“Aren't you upset at all you had to leave the company?”

“I'm furious.” Matthew nods. “But that doesn't change anything.” 

“No luck with any interviews?” 

“Not even past the first round.” Matthew sighs. 

“Fuck these people.” Taerae huffs. “I'm asking around for any places hiring, we'll find you somewhere better.” 

“Thanks, Taerae. You've been a great friend.” Matthew walks over to hug him. Taerae pretends to be grossed out, but doesn't move. “I'll find a job, so let's be friends forever.” 

“What do you mean?” Taerae snorts. “Would I stop being your friend if you're unemployed?” 

“Actually…” Matthew clears his throat and lets go of him. “My parents want me to go back to Canada, so they're not giving me money to stay here. If I don't find a job, I'll have to go back.” 

“Oh.” Taerae blinks at him. “Let's find you a job.” 

“Yeah.”

“How long do you think you can stay here without their money?” Taerae frowns, thinking. 

“A couple months. I have my savings.” Matthew hums. “If I sell some of my stuff, probably a few more.” 

“Perfect, we can get you something.” Taerae nods more confident. 

“Ok, let's order some chicken to have with these?” Matthew chuckles. 

“Spicy, order some Cola too.” 

“Sure.” 

Maybe moments like these are why Matthew is such a sucker for animation and the ‘power of friendship’ trope. Spending a nice afternoon with his best friend, eating and talking nonsense, heals him bit by bit. It's tiny little fragments of his life that make it worth it when he pieces them together. 

Taerae is a precious part of his life, and even with his help, Matthew hasn't been able to fully go back to his old self. In many ways, he doesn't think he ever will. Trusting people sounds a lot harder.

“What are you thinking about?” Taerae snaps his fingers in front of his eyes, making Matthew blink out of his daze and focus back on the TV in front of them.

“Nothing.” He eyes Taerae. 

“C’mon.” Taerae rolls his eyes. 

“Well, isn't it insane that I only found out my boyfriend was cheating on me, and is literally a criminal, thanks to another criminal having more decency than he did?” 

“Uh… Yeah, I think it is.” 

“That guy was way more handsome too.” Matthew exhales. 

“I'm not sure where you're going with this.” Taerae squints at him. 

“I'm not going anywhere with this. I'm just saying, I was sort of lucky that the thief had morals. I don't think that's very common. He also probably risked exposing himself by turning the laptop in.” 

“True. I’d say most would do the same, but probably not thieves.” Taerae eyes him. “Why do I feel like I should be worried about this?” 

“I was thinking I should thank him.” Matthew says quietly, and before Taerae can interrupt with his clear shock, he continues. “Aside from you, he's the only other person who actually helped me with anything.” 

“He's a burglar. A criminal.” Taerae looks at him like he's insane. 

“So? He's definitely a better person than the last criminal I brought to my bed.” 

“Are you thinking of sleeping with him?!” Taerae widens his eyes. 

“No! I mean I've done worse than befriending a burglar.” Matthew scowls at him. “And it's not like that. I just want to thank him once.” 

“Right…” Taerae takes a deep breath. “How do you plan on doing that? Even the cops haven't found him yet.” 

“So, I was searching on forums, and I've been thinking of asking around the neighborhood about the break-ins. I know what he looks like, so that's a big step. I'm not a cop, I can get someone to say something useful.” 

“Did you actually lose your mind? Are you playing detective?” Taerae gapes. “What if they're dangerous?” 

“I'm being super careful, it'll be fine. Also, I don't see the guy who put my ex in jail being the sort of person to kill over something petty like this.” 

“You don't know that. Also, there's no reason for you to thank him. He got pretty good money with the things he kept.” 

“It doesn't count. I feel like I need to see him to say it, I'm hoping it'll do something.” Matthew shrugs. 

“From now on, share your location with me at all times.” Taerae scowls. “I doubt you'll find him if the police didn't, and I hope I'm right.” 

“Fair enough.” Matthew giggles and nods. 

Perhaps the guy who changed everything can give him some sense of closure. 

-

After seeing the news of a burglary in his ex-boyfriend's neighborhood, Matthew rushes to get some information. It's not very nice to be asking questions around people who just got robbed, but eventually Matthew finds an old lady willing to tell him everything about it. 

Turns out they actually arrested the thief, but she says he was older and not so handsome, so he knows it's not the same guy. It's not a dead end though, as she goes on to tell him of all places he should avoid in the area, because bad people hang around there.

Obviously, he marks the areas on a map and starts his tour. It's not like there's any actual danger, just some shady business and unhappy faces. It's pretty clear to him that it won't lead him anywhere from there though. It's not like he knows who to ask for. 

After walking the whole neighborhood, he goes further to some places he heard about online. The one promising place he had on the list was a second hand shops that have been caught reselling used goods, but that leads nowhere. Matthew stops at the entrance of an alleyway and contemplates his path. It's one of the last marks on his map, ‘the alley near the mechanics’, but it doesn't look promising. He leans on the wall to check the map for anything ahead, thinking of what to do. 

This is when a stranger approaches him, a tall and broad man, shiny bald head, dressed in all black like a security guard. 

“Do you have a lighter?” He asks, a cigarette between his lips. 

“Sorry, don't smoke.” Matthew gives him an awkward smile. The guy eyes him, glancing at his phone. 

“Are you lost?” He raises his brows. 

“No. I'm just looking for someone.” Matthew replies, unsure if he should tell this guy anything. 

“Around here? Who?” He tilts his head, amused. 

“I don't know his name, or if he's even around here for that matter. It's more like ‘I hope I can meet him on the street’ type of situation.” Matthew clears his throat. 

“You're gonna have to give me details now.” The man chuckles, keeping his eyes focused on him. “I'm very curious, and it's not the first time I see you snooping around, so.” 

“Uh…” Matthew gulps, noticing the shift in his tone. It doesn't sound like a good idea to be completely honest, but it sounds like an even worse one to lie. “I'm looking for the guy that stole my watch.” 

“Oh.” He raises his brows. “Why? Was it your only valuable possession?” 

“It was a gift.” Matthew says, more confidently. “I'm willing to buy it back from him, I'm not trying to get him arrested or anything like that.” 

“And if you're looking for him, I assume you know what he looks like?” 

“Handsome. Tall. Black hair. Big eyes and nose. Stylish.” 

“Handsome? You won't find him.” The man chuckles. 

“You know him?” Matthew straightens up.

“I do. You won't find him.” He repeats, smirking. “Stop looking.”

“How do I know we're talking about the same person?” 

“Didn't you say he's handsome? Like supermodel type of handsome, right?” He raises his brows, Matthew nods. “Yeah. I know him.” 

“Can you tell him I'm looking for him?” Matthew asks, hesitant. 

“You do realize he's a criminal, right? Why would he expose himself like that?” He shakes his head. “Normal people never fail to confuse me.” 

“Please, just tell him. I didn't think I'd be lucky enough to find anything, you're my only hope.” Matthew bites his lips, hoping he looks genuine enough. 

“What's your name?” The man gives him a once over. 

“Seok Matthew. He should remember me.” Matthew smiles. “Thank you.” 

“Yeah, you should go now.” The man clicks his tongue. “And stop hanging around here.” 

“Of course.” Matthew nods. “But, how will I know if-”

“If he wants to see you, he'll find you. Go.” 

“Ok, thanks.” Matthew gives a small bow before walking away. 

He starts hopping when he gets to the main street. He doesn't know why he's so excited to meet a criminal, but it sort of feels like an adventure. 

-

A couple days pass without any developments, and there's nothing he can do but wait longer. Since the bald guy told him not to go there again, he wonders if he'll get a random call or text at socials, or if the meeting is not happening at all. He'd like to at least know if that was the case, that way he wouldn't be checking his phone every thirty minutes. 

“Did you come here to find a hot guy to kiss or to stare at your phone?” Taerae pokes his side. 

After being stuck at home for the past few days, Taerae forced him to go out with him. Matthew is not much of a drinker, but his friend said they need to get laid, so here they are at a gay bar. The beer he ordered when they got here is still half full. 

“Neither. I'm just your support, in case you don't find a hot dude to kiss, and get depressed about it.” Matthew pretends to sip his beer, it's warm. 

“I already kissed like two people while you were staring at your phone.” Taerae scoffs, then looks over his shoulder. “There's a guy staring at you from across the bar for like ten minutes.” 

“I'm not looking. Not interested.” Matthew sighs. 

“Well, tell him that then, cause he's coming over.” Taerae smirks and walks away before he can protest. 

“Hey.” The voice comes from behind him, and Matthew takes a deep breath before turning to acknowledge him. He's a fairly good looking guy, but normal. “Sorry to bother you, I was just wondering if I could buy you a drink?” 

“No, thanks. I'm cool.” Matthew smiles curtly. 

“So, do you want to go for a dance?” The guy tries again, not getting the hint. 

“I'm not interested.” Matthew says more firmly this time. 

“C'mon, I'm very into the same stuff you are.” He smirks. “Don't you like being watched?” 

Although over the last month he read numerous malicious comments and got weird looks, people never said anything so disrespectful to his face. It's so outrageous, he reacts with his first impulse before he can think twice. 

Matthew punches him on the nose, a very nice straight right. The guy almost falls back, stumbling on the people behind him as he screams and covers his face with his hands. 

“You fucking broke my nose!” He shouts, blood dripping through his fingers. 

“You deserved it.” Matthew sighs. “Send me your hospital bill.” 

“You fucking sucker. I'm calling the police.” 

“Over a punch?” Matthew raises his brow. “Pathetic.” 

The security soon rushes over to the commotion, and everyone seems to be staring at them. He spots Taerae a couple meters away frozen in shock. 

It takes some time to talk his way out of it, but he doesn't apologize, just sends enough money for the guy to pay his bills for the next two months. In Matthew's opinion, that was quite worth it, his nose is definitely broken. 

“Are you having an identity crisis?” Taerae scolds him on their walk back. “Why are you being like this?” 

“Like what?” 

“Reckless.” Taerae clicks his tongue. “Walking around looking for a burglar, and now getting into bar fights?” 

“I had legitimate reasons for both of those.” Matthew sulks. 

“I don't know, maybe for the fight, but definitely not for the other thing.” 

“If not for that random stranger I'd still be with Jiho.” 

“Well, I tried telling you to dump him, didn't I?” Taerae huffs. 

“Yeah, but I obviously wouldn't listen to you. You're almost like my brother, how could I?” Matthew snorts. 

“You're so…” Taerae punches his arm, frustrated. “Stop getting into trouble.” 

“I'll try.” 

They walk together for another ten minutes, and then Taerae is off to his own place. There's only a few blocks for him to walk alone, and it's still pretty early, so he just takes his time to enjoy the fresh air. 

A muffled thud startles him, coming from behind, but when he turns around there's nothing to see. Matthew waits for a couple seconds, and a chill runs down his spine as he stares at the empty street. He turns back ahead and walks faster. 

The faster he walks, the more sure he is that he can hear footsteps. His apartment is just another block down the street, so he's pretty sure he can make it if he runs. Just as he contemplates doing so, a hand pulls his arm. 

Before Matthew can scream or react, a hand clamps over his mouth. He struggles, but the stranger’s grip is strong and he's cornered on the wall. As he debates whether to wrench his arm or kick him in the sheen, Matthew is rooted in place when he looks to his attacker's face. 

It's him. As he stops moving, not fighting anymore, the burglar smiles. Tension suddenly leaves him.

“I'm gonna pull my hand now.” He says, slowly moving his fingers and releasing him. 

“The handsome burglar.” Matthew gasps as he looks up at the man smirking at him. 

“Handsome? Thanks. You're kinda cute too.” He chuckles, letting go of his arm as well. “I heard you're looking for me?” 

“Yes, actually.” Matthew nods, still a bit stunned. “I wanted to thank you.” 

“Thank me?” He knits his brows, leaning back. “I thought you wanted your watch back.” 

“No, I just said that not to sound too crazy.” Matthew purses his lips and the burglar looks sort of confused. “You saved me from that guy, so thanks.” 

“I see where you're coming from, but there's really no need. I just did what I should do.” The man sighs, now visibly bothered. 

“Yeah, but you could've gotten in trouble if they traced it back to you, and you took that risk, so thank you.” Matthew bows, and the man immediately tries to pull him up by the shoulders. 

“Stop that! That's weird. I literally robbed you.”

“If not for you that piece of trash would've gotten away with it for God knows how long.” Matthew raises his head. “I originally prepared something for you, but I don't have it with me right now. If you wait for a bit, I can go get it.” 

“I don't need anything.” He scowls. 

“It's money.” Matthew blinks up at him. “You don't want money? What kind of thief are you?” 

“The kind that doesn't need charity.” 

“Why are you a criminal then?”

“I have a very successful career, so keep your money.” He glares. 

“Fine. I'll just be in debt with you forever then.” Matthew rolls his eyes. 

“Are you drunk?” He tilts his head. 

“No, I'm actually this weird.” Matthew purses his lips. “I think you're weirder than me though. What sort of thief has morals?” 

“Most of them.” He snorts, eyeing him with disbelief. “What do you know about being a criminal?” 

“Nothing, I guess.” Matthew eyes him. 

“Was that all? You're not asking for your watch back?” 

“I wanted to give you money, but…” Matthew nods, trying to find something else to say. “l mean, I'm also kinda curious on how you found out and delivered the laptop to the police, but you don't have to tell me.” 

“And I won't.” He shakes his head. “Stop wasting time with criminals like me or your ex.” 

“You're definitely not like him.” 

“True, but you don't know that.” 

“I actually do. You're a much better person than he is, and I don't need to know all your crimes to be able to tell.” Matthew scoffs. 

“Right, because you're so good at judging people's character?” He purses his lips. 

“Damn.” Matthew gapes. 

“Sorry.” He clears his throat. “Well, good talk. See you never.” 

“Wait.” Matthew almost reaches for his arm but stops himself. “Can you tell me your name?” 

“Why would I do that? We're not meeting again.” 

“Exactly, we're never seeing eachother again, so what's the big deal? I should at least have a name for you when I tell this story to my friends.” Matthew argues, and seeing his unconvinced eyes, insists. "I swear by my life I'm not telling the cops."

A beat of silence as he stares at him.

“Jiwoong.” He drops it and turns his back to Matthew, not giving him any time to react before starting to walk away. A smile breaks on his face, dumb and senseless. 

“It's a pretty name!” Matthew calls out after him, giggling to himself. Jiwoong waves at him without turning around, and that's enough to warm him up for the rest of the night. 

-

Even though he told Jiwoong he wanted his name to tell the story, he never actually did that. It just doesn't feel right whenever he thinks about bringing it up, he likes being the only one to know about him. 

Matthew has been thinking a lot about him. There's a lot he was left curious about, and the more he wonders, the more he wishes he could know. It's pretty clear to Matthew they'll never meet again, and the thought has made him depressed lately. 

He'll never get the answers to his questions. What made him report it? Why did he choose that apartment in specific? How did he do it? When did he start doing this? What sort of criminal refuses money? Matthew is not supposed to be wondering about such things, but he just can't help it.

Getting a job didn't actually help him forget anything. It might've helped him dissociate even more actually. Being in an office ten hours a day feels extra boring now. 

His days are just mindless typing, filling sheets and writing emails, followed by a couple hours of staring into the ceiling at home. Exactly what he's planning on doing today as well. 

“No, I just got home.” Matthew says to the phone as he opens his front door.

“That's perfect. I wasn't planning on getting there before nine.” Taerae insists.

“I'm really tired. I have to pass for today.” 

“Oh, c'mon. It's been a month since we last went out.” 

“And how did that end up going?” Matthew snorts, taking off his shoes at the entrance. 

“A lot of my friends will be there, I swear it'll be fun.” 

“I know it'll be fun, which is why I'm not going. I'll spoil it.” Matthew sighs, walking through the dark apartment straight into the kitchen. “I won't be good company today.” 

“Should I go over then?” 

“You can come over on the weekend. Go have fun today. I'll just take a bath and watch TV under the covers.” 

“Fine, but we're going somewhere fun this weekend. You're not escaping it!” Taerae ends the call before he can reply, so he texts him a heart emoji. 

Matthew is gulping down his water when he walks back to the living room and flicks the lights on, which results in him spluttering all over the floor as he spots the man sitting on his couch. If he didn't have water on his mouth, he probably would've shouted, but instead he chokes and has to cough his lungs out. 

“I feel bad for sitting in the dark now.” Jiwoong says as Matthew bangs his chest and tries to catch his breath.

It takes him several seconds to be able to talk. As he recovers and takes in who's sitting on his couch, shock disperses into curiosity, and his heart slows down along with his thoughts.

“What-” Matthew coughs again, looking up to see him still sitting down giving him a worried look. “How did you get in here?” 

“The same way I get into any apartment.” Jiwoong chuckles. “Are you ok?” 

“I'll be.” Matthew clears his throat, taking the water bottle he dropped and contemplating the mess on the floor before looking back at him. “You scared the shit out of me. What are you doing here? How did you know where I live?” 

“About that…” Jiwoong finally gets up, and then Matthew realizes the state he's in. There's a blood stain on his side, and multiple cuts on his arms and legs. “Remember you said you owe me one? I might need to collect that.” 

“What the fuck happened to you?” Matthew gasps, rushing over to him. “You need to go to a hospital.”

“No.” Jiwoong protests firmly. “I just got hurt while running, it's nothing serious. Some rest and a few painkillers will do the job.” 

“Running from what?” Matthew blinks up at him. 

“The law.” Jiwoong chuckles. “Sorry. I just can’t go back to my place right now.” 

“You can stay here.” Matthew nods, then eyes the bloodstain on his shirt. “But we should really get you checked up.” 

“It's just a cut. I had to climb and fall some fences to get away.” 

“You're not staying here like this. I'm not letting you die from an infection in my apartment.” 

“It's not deep. I can stitch it myself.” Jiwoong eyes him. “Never done it before?” 

“Should I have?” Matthew guffaws. 

“I've dealt with worse.” Jiwoong smiles. “I just need some alcohol, a needle and thread.” 

“I have two of those.” Matthew rushes his hand through his hair. “Ok, make me a list. I'll go down to the drugstore. Put in anything that might help.” 

“You're just going to roll with this?” Jiwoong studies him, amused. 

“What do you mean?” 

“I just broke into your house bleeding and I don't have to convince you not to call the cops?” Jiwoong looks at him like he's the weird one. 

“We're not exactly strangers anymore, Jiwoon-ssi.” Matthew shrugs. “I'll be right back. You can maybe take a shower in the meantime? Is that ok? Will it make the bleeding worse?” 

“I’ll take a cold shower. Thanks.” Jiwoong nods, apparently humored. 

Not wasting any time, Matthew runs back outside. Thankfully there's a drugstore just down the block, so he buys antiseptic and some ointments to apply on the cuts. He has to run a bit more to find a needle in the convenience store, but he's back in the apartment within twenty minutes. 

The shower is still running when he gets back, and he leaves everything on the center table before heading to his room. Everything seems to be in place, so he goes back to the hallway and knocks on the bathroom door. 

“Hey, did you get a change of clothes?” 

“Yeah, I got some sweatpants and a shirt from the second drawer, is that ok?” Jiwoong shouts back. 

“Perfect!” 

Matthew goes back to the kitchen and checks his fridge. There's nothing ready to eat, and he's not about to cook anything either. He pulls up his phone instead and orders some pizza.  

Five minutes later, Jiwoong walks into the living room half naked. He's not wearing the shirt, holding it in his hand, and his hair is still dripping. The cut on his side is clean now, and like he said, it's really not that deep, but it doesn't look good either.

“The shirt didn't fit you?” Matthew asks, avoiding looking down to his very nicely toned muscles. 

“No, I just don't want to stain it. I'll patch up first.” 

“Oh, right.” Matthew nods. “How can I help?” 

“You've helped enough.” Jiwoong chuckles, looking over at the table. “Did you bring the whole store?” 

“There’s two types of antiseptic, I wasn't sure which one you'd like, also bandages, ointments, tape and painkillers. Isn't this the bare minimum?” 

“Bare minimum is pure alcohol and a piece of cloth.” Jiwoong shakes his head, slowly sitting down in front of the couch. “You don't have to watch.” 

“It's fine. I'm not squirmish.” Matthew sits down on the side, about to find out if he's lying or not. 

“Ok, just don't pass out on me.” Jiwoong scoffs. 

He cleans up the wound first, applying a generous amount of antiseptic over it. Jiwoong takes longer putting the thread through the needle head than he does stitching up his own flesh. Without hesitation, he pierces his own skin and stitches it together with clean and precise knots. 

The first one is already too much for him, but he keeps on looking until it's done, sort of horridly hypnotized. It's over pretty fast anyway, and it was definitely the worst part. Jiwoong quickly proceeds to tie the gauze around his stomach, finishing up. 

“Are you secretly a surgeon?” Matthew blinks at him. 

“Stitches are probably the easiest part of being a surgeon.” Jiwoong laughs. “This is easy to do. I could teach you.” 

“I don't think I'd be able to use that skill.” 

“Fair enough.” Jiwoong shakes his head, amused. 

“Well, you can dress up now.” Matthew clears his throat.

“Oh, yeah.” Jiwoong says, as if he didn't realize he's showing off his chest. He doesn't stall and quickly puts on the shirt before resuming to clean up the table. 

“I ordered some pizza.” Matthew gets up to help. “Should be here soon.”

“You're the best.” Jiwoong shudders, looking up at him with a smile so cute it sort of makes Matthew lose track of his thoughts for a second. 

“Sure.” Matthew turns around as soon as he realizes his racing heartbeat. Not good. 

Their dinner is filled with awkward silence at first, but the more Matthew thinks about it, the more justified his curiosity is. Jiwoong says he has to stay here, Matthew has the right to know why. 

“How old are you?” Matthew breaks the silence as they munch on their pizzas. 

“Twenty-seven.” 

“I'm twenty-three.” 

“I know.” 

“How?” Matthew squints at him, lowering the slice he was about to stuff inside his mouth. 

“Not telling.” Jiwoong smirks. 

“I'll call the cops on you.” 

“Doubt it.” Jiwoong shrugs. “I can tell you what else I know about you though.” 

“That's… Ok, go on.” 

“Seok Matthew, born in Canada in 2002. Your parents own a successful Korean food chain back in your home country, and they gave you a very comfortable life. You moved here for university and never left. You like comics, bicycles, and sweet potatoes apparently.”

“So, you snooped around the house?” Matthew blinks at him. 

“Yes. Sorry.” Jiwoong chuckles. 

“I see what I'm dealing with now.” Matthew snorts. 

“What?” 

“You just like to sound mysterious.” 

“Maybe.” Jiwoong shrugs. 

“You'll have to tell me why you're staying at my house though.” Matthew eyes him, more serious. 

“Yeah, figured.” Jiwoong sighs, taking another bite of pizza to delay his reply. “My last job was not a success.” 

“Oh, so the police are actually looking for you?” 

“They caught me on the scene and chased after me, so the chances I was caught on camera are very high.” Jiwoong rushes his hands through his hair. 

“Why can't you go home though?” 

“I think someone ratted me out.” Jiwoong pauses and eyes him, probably contemplating how much of it he's going to share.

“How does that stop you from going back home?” Matthew presses. 

“If they knew where I'd be today, it means they're on the inside.” Jiwoong tells him, now actually serious. “The police are also a factor, I can't go back before knowing what I'm dealing with.” 

“So, what are you doing next?” Matthew resumes eating, imagining chase scenes he's not sure are accurate.

“I need to contact some people to get my money to safety. Lay low. If things get worse, probably planning an escape out of the country.” Jiwoong hums. 

“Sounds so professionally criminal of you.” Matthew chuckles, not helping it. “This is absurd. I can't believe I'm having this conversation.” 

“What? The criminal is finally starting to sound like a criminal and it bothers you?” 

“It doesn't bother me.” Matthew holds his gaze. “You can stay however long you need, but I have two conditions.” 

“Name it.” 

“One, don't lie to me while you're here. Two, don't bring anyone else in here.”

“Done.” Jiwoong knits his brows and eyes him. “I wasn't planning on doing either of those things.” 

“Great. Make yourself at home.” Matthew notices Jiwoong studying him. “What? Did you think I'd lecture you about not stealing or something?” 

“Yes, actually.” Jiwoong purses his lips. 

“I'm sure you have your reasons, and I know I'm not about to change you.” Matthew shrugs. “I don't see you as a threat, and I do feel indebted to you, so why not help?” 

“Not a threat?” Jiwoong scoffs. “I'm not sure if I should be offended or not.” 

“No, it was a compliment.” Matthew thinks for a moment. “I mean, you could steal from me, but… Honestly, that's still much better than having anything done to me.” 

“I see.” Jiwoong nods, getting quiet. 

“Aren't you telling me why you're here though?” Matthew watches him. 

“I just did.” Jiwoong knits his brows. 

“No, you told me why you had to find a place to hide. You didn't tell me why you're here.” Matthew can see Jiwoong's face falling into a sort of shameful look. “Why my place?”

“There’s multiple reasons, actually.” Jiwoong clears his throat, avoiding his eyes. “No one will come looking for me here. You seem pretty trustworthy, and the fact you feel like you owe me something was a plus. Also, you're rich, so I thought it'd be fun.” 

“Reasonable.” Matthew snorts. “But why do you think I'm trustworthy?” 

“Just a vibe.” Jiwoong gives him a once over, making him feel self-conscious. “Don't see you ratting me out.” 

“I'm not planning to, but somehow that makes me feel bad. Do I look like I'm soft?” 

“Yes, definitely.” Jiwoong nods. 

“I'll get the couch ready for you.” Matthew sighs and gets up, while Jiwoong giggles to himself. 

-

In the morning, Matthew groggily leaves his room, halting as he's reminded of the man sleeping on his couch. Jiwoong looks so peaceful sleeping, soft and elegant, like an angel. 

It's surreal to think this man is actually a criminal. Matthew wasn't scared of him at all, even though he still doesn't know how he got in. Months of distrusting everyone who approaches him, but somehow Jiwoong sets off no alarms.

After staring for longer than he'd like to admit, Matthew moves on to get ready for work as quietly as possible. He gets dressed and eats cold leftover pizza, because the microwave would be too loud.

The fridge is basically empty, so he leaves some money on the balcony along with a note telling Jiwoong to order something. With his routine broken, he ends up leaving in a rush not to be late. 

The day of work is completely lost on him. Although time was moving slower while working, once he clocks out, it’s like it never happened. Throughout the whole day, his mind kept stubbornly wondering what Jiwoong was doing back in his apartment. 

It's been a while since he actually felt excited to go home, and his mood dapens as soon as he realizes it. Matthew shouldn't be letting Jiwoong affect his mood this much, but it feels inevitable now. He's just too interesting.

It's past eight once Matthew gets home, and it's a little weird to find the lights on. He got used to being alone, even before everything. 

Immediately once he gets past the entrance, he can tell the room has been cleaned up. There's a fresh lavender fragrance around the place, there's no dust to be seen, and the floor looks spotless. 

“I'm home!” Matthew calls out as he steps into the living room, a little amazed. 

“Come over here a sec!” Jiwoong shouts back, and Matthew follows his voice to his bedroom. 

Even his sheets were changed, and the mess on his desk is now in small organizers he's never seen before. Jiwoong sits in front of the computer, looking at some sort of chat. 

“Hey, what you doing?” Matthew greets him, walking closer to check the screen. 

“Trying to get my money.” Jiwoong sighs. “Sorry to just take your things, but I didn't look into your stuff. Promise.”

“That's fine, I don't mind.” Matthew shakes his head, peeking at the chat. A little amused at the thief's politeness.

The other person is telling Jiwoong they need more time, and that's basically what he understands. The rest of the texts are a bunch of abbreviated codewords that read like gibberish to Matthew. 

“Are you in trouble?” 

“Maybe. The police couldn't identify me, but they're snooping around.” Jiwoong tongues his cheeks, and he's even more attractive when he's angry. Matthew averts his eyes. 

“Ok… What does that mean?” 

“It means I have to get a new identity.” Jiwoong groans and rubs his temple. 

“Why don't you take that as a sign to change careers too?” Matthew pats his back. Jiwoong looks up at him with tired eyes. 

“I'm only good at stealing.” Jiwoong says flatly. 

“I doubt that.” Matthew sustains his gaze until he sighs and shakes his head. 

“I'll heat up dinner.” Jiwoong closes the open tabs in the computer and gets up. “You should've let me know your schedule.”

“I usually get home around eight, but it's not rare for me to work overtime, so sometimes around ten.” Matthew says, following him to the kitchen. 

“What time did you leave the apartment?” Jiwoong asks. “You should've woken me up.”

“It was around seven thirty, you were sleeping so comfortably I couldn't possibly.” Matthew chuckles. “You have to rest properly to heal. You shouldn't be cleaning up the house, but thank you for doing that.” 

As they step into the kitchen, Matthew is surprised with the multiple pans around the stove. There's even cut out vegetables at the counter, waiting to be finished. 

“I'll be staying here for a couple days, I should keep things clean. It's the bare minimum.” Jiwoong replies absently as he turns on the fire to heat up the pans. "Is there anything here you don't like?"

“I'm not a picky eater.” Matthew walks over to peek at the contents, spotting a soup. "Did you cook all this?"

“Yes.” Jiwoong washes his hands and takes the vegetables, adding them to another pot with potatoes and kimchi. 

“You made kimchi?” Matthew raises his brows. 

“No, I bought it.” Jiwoong snorts. “You left money for groceries, forgot?” 

“Oh, right.” 

“I bought some from a restaurant nearby, but the rest I made myself.” 

“You didn't have to make dinner, or clean up.” Matthew eyes him, lowering his gaze to the spot he knows is wounded. 

“I know. I did it because I wanted to. Also, you didn't have to take me in either.” Jiwoong says, glancing at him. “Besides, I'm fine.” 

“Did you clean the wound again?” Matthew asks, hoping he's not being too intrusive. 

“Yes, it looks fine. I used one of those ointments you bought, I think it helped.” Jiwoong smiles. “Thanks.” 

“Glad to help.” Matthew nods, biting back his own smile trying to break out. 

“Then, go set the table.” Jiwoong bumps his side with him, which is sort of silly and makes him giggle, but he complies. 

It's easy to forget he's having dinner with a criminal. Actually, it's been hard from the start to see Jiwoong as a bad or immoral person. Stealing just seems so unimportant at this point, and that's not something he's proud to be thinking, but it's the truth. 

It seems to bother Jiwoong though. 

“Are you a psychopath?” Jiwoong watches him. 

“What?” Matthew grimaces, mouth full of rice. 

“Why would you just take me in without freaking out? Are you planning on murdering me?”

“No. I wouldn't be fine with this if it was someone else.” Matthew shakes his head. 

“You don't even know me.” Jiwoong frowns. “You're treating me like I'm an old friend when we basically met yesterday.”

“I know enough.” Matthew shrugs. “I haven't really been able to trust people since what happened, but you…You're not like that. I know that much.” 

“That guy…” Jiwoong sighs. “You'll find someone who'll treat you right.”

“I’m not counting on it anymore.” Matthew scoffs. “I’ll be fine without a man.”

“I guess that works too.” Jiwoong nods, eyeing him. 

“I'll charge you for the day if you ask me again why I let you stay.” 

“Is it because I'm handsome?” Jiwoong smirks. 

“That's it. I'm charging you a hundred thousand won per day.” 

“That's too much, give me a discount.” Jiwoong snorts. 

“For a fugitive? I don't think so." Matthew teases. "Tell me heist stories and I'll think about it.” 

“What do you expect to hear? It's not really exciting to break into empty apartments and take stuff.” 

“Well, I don't know. Make it interesting.” 

Jiwoong was certainly lying when he said it's not exciting, or every story he told was a lie, but either way his line of work doesn't sound boring at all. They stay on the topic of weird things he found in people's homes for the entire dinner, and there's still more stories to be heard. 

For someone else, the length of the conversation might've been an alert of how many crimes this guy has committed. For Matthew, he's just even more intrigued by the existence of Jiwoong. 

It's already late once their talk starts to get dragged along with their voices. They move to the living room at some point, and Matthew sits on the floor while Jiwoong sprawls on the couch. 

“I really wanted to resist it, but can I smoke here?” Jiwoong asks with a grunt.

“Uh…” Matthew turns to look at him, and the pure desperation in his eyes feels hard to deny. “Ok, just do it by the window.” 

“Thank you.” Jiwoong exhales in relief, quickly jumping off the couch to get the pack of cigarettes amongst his things in the corner of the room. 

“You can take a spot on the cabinet, there's space.” Matthew comments, watching him open up the big window.

“I'm sure there's enough space for my voluminous baggage.” Jiwoong chuckles. “I should probably throw the shirt in the trash and steal one of yours.” 

“I'll just give it to you, you don't have to steal it.” Matthew snorts. 

“Well, it's funnier that way.” Jiwoong shrugs, putting the cigarette between his lips and lighting it up. Matthew watches as he takes his first drag, closing his eyes and relaxing his whole body as he exhales. 

“Is it that good?” Matthew sighs, seeing the smoke disperse inside instead of out the window. 

“Not really, but staying without it is worse.” Jiwoong eyes him. “Sorry, your house is going to smell bad.” 

“I don't mind.” Matthew takes a deep breath, and he controls his face not to grimace. “I mean, it's not exactly nice, but it's fine.” 

“It's my last one anyway.” Jiwoong lifts up the cigarette. Matthew takes note of the packaging. 

“What does it do for you? Smoking?” Matthew watches him, curious. 

“It's like… I don't know, it's more like a habit at this point.” Jiwoong contemplates his answer for a moment. “I guess it calms me down, not even only because of nicotine, but the act of it. Focusing on breathing, keeping your hands busy. It's a stress relief in many ways.” 

“That makes sense, like those fidget toys, but it burns your lungs along with it.”

“Exactly, also makes you an addict, so.” Jiwoong puffs the smoke out the window, smiling at him. Matthew was never one to find smoking attractive, but he gets it now. 

“When did you start?” 

“Around seventeen? I was still in highschool.” 

“You've been smoking for a decade? Oh, I'd never be able to tell, it hasn't gotten to you yet.” 

“When you put it like that...” Jiwoong scowls. “I guess I'm not hoping to live long enough to have it catch up.” 

“That's depressing.” Matthew mumbles.

“Yeah.” Jiwoong snorts. “I think that's the least of my problems though.”

“When did you start stealing?” Matthew asks, taking advantage of the good moment. 

“That's difficult to answer. Since I can remember?” Jiwoong hums. “I remember stealing chocolate from a shop when I was a kid, and my mom had me return it.” 

“You know what I mean.” Matthew stares. 

“After I graduated.” Jiwoong eyes him, taking another drag as he sustains his gaze. “I already had some stuff under my belt during school, but I only officially joined a group after I became an adult.” 

“A group?” Matthew gapes. 

“Yeah, I worked for loan sharks for a couple years. Then everyone important got arrested, and I had to fend for myself.” Jiwoong explains casually. “I was always good at stealing, it was sort of a hobby during school days, so I decided to go for it.” 

“What the fuck, bro.” Matthew keeps gaping at him. 

“How are you shocked at that? At this point?” Jiwoong laughs.

“I don't know what I was expecting.” Matthew huffs. 

“I do. You were expecting a sob story of how I was poor and had to steal to survive or something like that. Sorry to disappoint, not the case.” Jiwoong puts out the cigarette, pressing it against the ledge. “I'm just like this.” 

“Like what?” Matthew blinks up at him. 

“You know, I tried fitting into the role model student, or the nice friend, but… I just never did.” Jiwoong pauses and takes a deep breath. "Humans need belonging, and I feel like I belong where I am.” 

“Bullshit.” Matthew scowls, and Jiwoong turns to him with surprise. “I mean, so what if you don't fit in? I was bullied for being ugly in middle school but I didn't grow up to be any sort of criminal, just insecure.” 

“Well, I guess I like the rush.” Jiwoong tilts his head, smiling. 

“That makes more sense.” Matthew scoffs. “I think you're wrong though. I'm sure there's more to you than stealing.” 

“Really? You've known me for a day and think that?” Jiwoong shakes his head, amused. 

“You're my life saviour, I have faith in you.” Matthew chuckles. 

“Stop that.” Jiwoong frowns. “I'm not your saviour, I told you I didn't do anything worthy of praise.” 

“You did though. At this point, I'm not sure most people would've even turned the laptop in. Most people I've met seem to blame me for it.” Matthew runs a hand through his hair. “I don't think you really understand what you did for me.” 

“It wasn't a big de-”

“It was to me.” Matthew glares at him, triggered. “I had a life planned with that man, I spent my day doing things for him. I gave up so much to be with him, and what did I get? He couldn't even say sorry when I went to see him. I wouldn't have seen the hell I was in if you didn't cross my path.” 

“Ok.” Jiwoong nods, pursing his lips. “I didn't mean to make less of your feelings.”

“I know, but just take my praises and smile.” Matthew huffs. 

“Ok.” Jiwoong repeats, nodding awkwardly. 

“I'm going to bed.” Matthew sighs, getting up. 

“Are you working tomorrow?” 

“No, but I might go out.” Matthew eyes him, Jiwoong keeps watching him. “Good night.” 

“Good night.” 

The way Jiwoong stares at him is particularly off-putting, as if he's studying his every move. Matthew doesn't know how to handle that, so he just doesn't. Instead, he thinks about it, almost obsessively, and wonders if he'll be let in. 

-

It's sort of bitter to eat the delicious food Jiwoong prepares for them. At first it reminds him of how that guy would never do it, then it makes him realize he isn't as great a cook as he thought. Also, the fact it won't last long is especially souring. That doesn't mean he's not enjoying every bit of it while he can, in fact, he's probably going to gain some weight if he keeps this up.

He's already on his third bowl of rice when the doorbell rings. Matthew almost chokes when he gets up to check the camera and finds Taerae outside his door. Jiwoong stands on the kitchen entryway, apparently amused with his panic. 

“Ya, I can hear you. Let me in.” Taerae says through the ring cam. 

“Uhm, yeah. Just a second.” Matthew mutes the mic and turns to Jiwoong. “What do we do?” 

“Let him in? Isn't he your friend?” 

“Aren't you worried about being seen?” Matthew whispers. 

“Do you have to tell him what I do for a living?” Jiwoong frowns. 

“Well…” Matthew sighs, thinking of excuses to come up with. 

“Just say I'm a friend staying over. It's not exactly a lie.” Jiwoong shrugs, going back to the kitchen to finish his food. 

Looks like they're friends now. Matthew takes a deep breath and goes to open the door for Taerae, who's already impatiently knocking again. 

“Hey, sorry to make you wait.” Matthew clears his throat and smiles. 

“What are you doing?” Taerae squints at him.

“Having breakfast.” Matthew stays cool under his stare. “With a guest.” 

“You have someone over? At this hour?” Taerae hushes, smirking. 

“Not like that. C'mon in.” Matthew sighs and lets him in. 

Taerae follows him to the kitchen with a glint in his eyes, and once he spots Jiwoong, he fully gasps. The thief just chuckles. 

“Oh, hi.” Taerae bows slightly, hand over his chest. “I don't think I know you.” 

“Hi, I'm Jiwoong. It's nice to meet you.” He bows back, smiling. “Do you wanna join us for breakfast?” 

“He cooked everything. Eat while it's warm.” Matthew says, taking his bowl to sit next to Jiwoong. “This is Taerae, my best friend.” 

“Ok, I can eat.” Taerae says, still smirking. Matthew rolls his eyes. 

“Jiwoon-hyung is my friend. He's staying over for a couple days.” Matthew says before Taerae jumps to further conclusions, getting an amused look from Jiwoong. 

“Friend? From where?” Taerae asks as he takes a bowl for himself and sits with them. Matthew stuffs his mouth to have time to think of an answer. 

“We met back at his ex’s apartment complex.” Jiwoong says casually. “I'm moving right now and I didn't have anyone to take me in temporarily, so I reached out to Matthew here.” 

“Oh, where are you moving to? Out of Seoul?” 

“That's the thing, I don't know yet. I wasn't planning on leaving my current place for the next few months, but I ran into some issues.” Jiwoong sighs. “I'm trying to figure something out to stop bothering Matthew here.” 

“You're not a bother.” Matthew huffs. “He got hurt and still cleaned up the whole house yesterday.”

“That’s nice of you. Also your food is amazing.” Taerae hums, munching on the fried vegetables. “Matthew should've introduced me earlier.” 

“I'll cook something fancy before I leave, and ask Matthew to invite you over.” Jiwoong chuckles. 

“Cook something fancy for me everyday. Why do you have to wait until you leave?” Matthew asks, and has to forcefully fix his pout. 

“I thought I should rest more? Are you suddenly against that?” Jiwoong laughs, reaching out to ruffle his hair. 

The gesture is so out of the blue for him, Matthew's heart skips a beat. He doesn't let himself get stuck on it though, otherwise both of them would realize it pretty quickly. The food has his entire attention while the talk goes on next to him. 

Somehow, Jiwoong doesn't lie, not exactly. It's like he tells half truths, that without context sound like they mean something else. It's incredibly witty of him, and Matthew also thinks it's considerate, but somewhat scary that he has such skill. They talk about the most random stuff too, like types of furniture they'd like, or how spicy they like their chicken. 

“So, do you wanna go out with us today?” Taerae asks Jiwoong after they're all full and the table has been cleared. 

“Where are you guys going?” 

“Yes, where are we going?” Matthew raises his brows. 

“Han-sunbaenim’s art expo. It's closing tomorrow.” 

“Oh, I didn't know. Cool.” Matthew hums, and eyes Jiwoong. “Do you think you can go? It'll be pretty cool, sunbaenim makes sensory pieces.” 

“What's that?” Jiwoong darts his eyes between them. 

“Last time, he had a room in which the lights would go out, then this white noise would play, and blue lights would slowly come on, and it was like you were going up the ocean to the surface. It was really cool.” Matthew explains. “It's stuff like that, visual shows, interactive sculptures, things you can feel or touch.” 

“Oh, that sounds interesting.” Jiwoong nods. “Where will it be?” 

“It's nearby. The gallery on the station's street.” Taerae says, apparently excited over the possibility of Jiwoong accepting. 

“That should be fine…” Jiwoong hums, eyeing Matthew. “Is it ok with you if I come?”

“Of course.” He smiles, a bit worried, but mostly excited.

Since Jiwoong has no clothes, Matthew lends him some of his own. The loosest pair of jeans he has don't look as baggy or long on Jiwoong, but it fits him alright. Along with the tight black shirt, he ends up looking like a model anyway. For safety measures, Jiwoong puts on a mask as well. 

It's still early once they get to the gallery, and Jiwoong doesn't seem as alert as he was out in the street. Taerae seems to be enjoying his company, which makes Matthew happy as well. 

The exhibit itself is pretty amazing, way better than last time. A series of pieces within the theme of human connection, and each one through a different lense. There's multiple visual rooms, one of them simulating a trip out of the galaxy this time. Another room had old telephone cables tangled like meshes, and they had to squeeze out through them to get out.

The three of them share giggles and reflections as they walk around the whole thing, and it's at least two hours spent there. Unfortunately they couldn't meet their sunbae to congratulate him, but they made sure to take a couple pictures to send him. Jiwoong even shows up in some of them, indulging Matthew. 

They're still not hungry once they leave, so Matthew proposes they go shopping, wanting to get Jiwoong some clothes. Taerae says he'll meet a friend of his that works nearby, and asks to meet them later at Matthew's apartment again, so they can have a drink. 

Drinking in the afternoon is not a big yes for Matthew, but he hasn't drinked in a while, and if he's home it's easier to handle it. After settling their plans, they split up, and Matthew takes Jiwoong with him to the main street. Jiwoong looks extremely uncomfortable once they get there, walking around like he's about to be jumped. 

“Can you relax? It's more suspicious if you're acting like that.” Matthew teases him. 

“I'm more scared of cameras than people recognizing me.” Jiwoong sighs, rolling his shoulders back in an attempt to relax. 

“It's fine. We'll be quick.” Matthew assures him. “I think we should get you a few shirts and jeans, some pajamas, maybe a floor mattress too since we're here? Just the more basic stuff.” 

“I don't have access to my money right now. We're not getting all that.” Jiwoong clicks his tongue. 

“Why would you think you'd be the one paying for it?” Matthew scoffs. “I know you're broke.”

“I'm not broke. I just moved my money somewhere else.” Jiwoong rolls his eyes. 

“Sure, if that helps you sleep at night.” Matthew chuckles. “It's fine, I was planning on buying some stuff for you anyway. This way you can choose and try things on.” 

“You're so weird.” Jiwoong sighs, eyeing him. 

“Yeah, let's start here.” Matthew ignores his protest and drags him inside the first store. 

Jiwoong seems to like simple style clothing, so Matthew doesn't have as much fun as he thought while watching him try things on. Still, pretty nice visuals, even in simple shirts and sweatpants.

They buy a lot more than intended before they move on, so Jiwoong won't have to repeat outfits for a week. Their last stop is at the convenience store, to get an ashtray and cigarettes. 

“Are you sure this is ok? You don't even smoke.” Jiwoong sighs as they walk back to the apartment. 

“It's fine. The smell really doesn't bother me.” Matthew assures him. 

“I'll only be staying for a couple more days, you didn't have to buy me so much stuff.” Jiwoong eyes him. 

“Right, because you've solved everything already?” Matthew raises his brows. 

“No, but I'll do it. Once my money is safe, I'll be free to move.” 

“To do what? Do you have a plan?” 

“Yes.” 

“Can you let me in on it?” Matthew gives him a bored stare. 

“Not sure. Do you want to be an accomplice?” 

“I already am.” Matthew rolls his eyes. 

“Well, I suspect the guy who snitched is someone who I used to sell the goods to. We've had some disagreements.” Jiwoong clears his throat. “Anyways, I'm planning on returning the favour.” 

“You're snitching him? That's your plan?” Matthew eyes him. “Do you have something on him?” 

“I know where he keeps all the stolen stuff he reforms. I'm working with someone to get the cops there.” 

“Why don't you just make an anonymous complaint? Like with the laptop.” 

“There's no proof to do that. I'm thinking of starting a fire or a fight there.” Jiwoong chuckles. 

“Just don't get caught.” Matthew hums.

“I think I'm a bad influence on you.” Jiwoong laughs. 

“No, definitely a good one. I think I should learn how to defy authority a little bit.” 

“What have I done?” Jiwoong shakes his head, amused. 

“You overestimate yourself. Two days with you won't turn me into a criminal.” Matthew snorts. 

“I don't know, Taerae says you're gullible.” Jiwoong gives him mocking sympathetic eyes. Matthew hits his arm with the bag he's holding. 

“Taerae is the one who ate up your whole nice guy persona. He can't say shit.” 

“It's not a persona? I'm actually a nice guy.” Jiwoong clicks his tongue. “A nice guy who happens to steal stuff sometimes.” 

“Sure.” Matthew side-eyes him. “But, since we're on the topic of my best friend… Can I tell him?” 

“Uh… You do have that right, but I'm not sure about that.” Jiwoong purses his lips. “I don't think he'll be cool about me staying with you.” 

“I think he'll understand. He liked you.” 

“If he agrees not to call the cops, I'm fine with it.” Jiwoong sighs. 

“I just don't like lying to him, and I'm also not good at it.” Matthew sulks. 

“Don't give me those eyes.” Jiwoong waves his free hand in front of his face. “Let's walk faster. I'm hungry.” 

“Why? Are you weak to my puppy eyes?” Matthew giggles, exaggerating his big eyes blinking up at Jiwoong, who glares at him with red ears. 

“You're something else…” 

“Should we buy something to eat at home?” Matthew's smile is big, and he can't bring himself to care if it's too much. 

“Are you tired of my cooking?” 

“Never.” Matthew denies too quickly. “You said you're hungry, it'll take some time if you're going to cook.” 

“I'm messing with you. Let's go.” Jiwoong giggles.

It's past five when Taerae joins them with a pack of beer and a bucket of fried chicken. For the next few hours, they have fun like old time friends, even though they're not. Just like his best friend, Taerae seems to grow fond of Jiwoong incredibly fast, bursting out laughing at his bad jokes every other minute. 

At some point, when he realizes they're in a happy little bubble that will eventually burst, Matthew gives up on telling him the whole truth. Jiwoong will be gone in a few days, and everything will go back to the way it was. Why ruin it before it's time?

His best friend leaves his house happy and definitely drunk, telling him to go for it because he approves. Matthew pretends he didn't hear it, brushing off the comments as he helps Taerae into a cab late at night. 

Once he comes back inside, Jiwoong is smoking by the window. Matthew feels the urge to do something very problematic. Instead, he walks over to the kitchen and takes the bottle of whiskey he keeps in the cabinet, along with two glasses. Jiwoong gives him a curious look as he walks back to the living room. 

“I thought you don't like drinking?” 

“I don't have many opportunities to drink this.” Matthew serves them each a glass, taking it over to Jiwoong standing by the window. 

The way Jiwoong takes the glass from his hand, brushing their fingers, a smirk on his lips as he takes a drag of his cigarette, it's all too much. Matthew clears his throat and lifts his own glass, Jiwoong mimics him and they both take a sip while maintaining eye contact. 

“Just ask.” Jiwoong exhales. 

“Why didn't you take my money?” Matthew asks calmly. 

“Not what I expected you to be curious about.” Jiwoong purses his lips. 

“What did you expect?” Matthew raises his brows. 

“I don't actually know, but not that.” Jiwoong shrugs. “I didn't take your money because I don't need it, I told you that.” 

“Yeah, but does that make sense? If you steal random electronics and jewelry for a living?” Matthew leans on the window to look outside.

“What are you implying?” Jiwoong's voice is calm.

“That you're not telling me everything about what you do.” Matthew glances at him, catching him tonguing his teeth. 

“You're right.” Jiwoong takes another sip of his drink and puts out the cigarette. “Do you want to know?”

“Yes.” Matthew stares, but Jiwoong avoids his eyes. 

“It's not random.” Jiwoong says quietly. "The targets." 

The laptop... Matthew gasps silently, waiting for Jiwoong to go on, but already connecting the dots. 

“It's not always justified, like that dirt bag's case. Sometimes it's petty revenge, a lot of cheating spouses, and a good amount of people are just jealous.” Jiwoong continues. “They pay me to steal something they want, and make it look like a common robbery. Whatever else I get is extra.”

“Who hired you?” Matthew asks, a bit distraught. It wasn't a coincidence.

“One of the guys in that group had a girlfriend. A very rich woman, with a lot of dangerous connections.” Jiwoong sips his drink. “I heard he died in a tragic car accident just a few days before the police found out about the chatrooms. They could barely identify him.” 

“Huh.” Matthew looks back outside, trying to ground himself as he stares into the nightlights. He downs his drink. It wasn't a coincidence. Someone wanted Jiho to be exposed.

“Are you disappointed?” 

“A little bit.” Matthew admits, pursing his lips. “But I guess you warned me. You didn't do anything out of the goodness of your heart after all.” 

“Yeah. I was paid fairly well.” Jiwoong sighs. “Do you want me to leave?” 

“What? No.” Matthew whips his head, frowning. Jiwoong eyes him with surprise. “I don't care if you were paid to do it, the fact is you still did it. I'm not less thankful.” 

“But you're disappointed?” Jiwoong raises an eyebrow. 

“Well, yeah.” Matthew rushes a hand through his hair. “I thought you did it because you're a good person, but you did it for money. That's not the image I had of you, but at the same time… You told me I was wrong, and I chose not to listen, so.” 

“I don't understand if you're angry or not.” Jiwoong stares at him like he's a puzzle. 

“I'm not.” Matthew snorts. “I still think you're a good person, aside from all that.”

“Have you learned nothing?” Jiwoong chuckles, shaking his head. 

“You've been nothing but respectful towards me.” Matthew says, trying to keep his voice nonchalant despite being serious. 

“I can be faking it. It's been two days.” Jiwoong studies him. 

“Sure, but then that's on you, not on me.” Matthew shrugs. “If you're that good of an actor, maybe you should chase that career.”

“You’re weird.” Jiwoong clicks his tongue. 

“I thought we were past that.” 

“I'm not.” 

“Is it really that weird to you I let you stay? You're handsome, and I'm a weak man.” Matthew's joke doesn't sound like a joke at all once he says it aloud. Jiwoong gapes for a second, visibly getting flustered. 

“Are you flirting with me?” Jiwoong blinks, licking his lips. 

“Would you be interested if I was?” Matthew stares back, feeling his face getting warm as shame floods him.

“I think you've had enough to drink.” Jiwoong takes a deep breath and reaches for his glass, Matthew lets him take it. “Let's go to sleep.” 

Jiwoong walks away before he can say anything else. It's probably for the best. He shouldn't be looking for more problems. 

-

It took him some time to actually get out of bed in the morning, he didn't know how he'd look Jiwoong in the eye, but turns out that didn't matter. Jiwoong pretends nothing happened, he serves breakfast and asks for the computer after they're done. They don't talk about it. 

Matthew avoids staying in the living room though, letting him have some privacy. After crossing the line last night, he shouldn't be snooping around his business. He's even considering leaving the house in the afternoon when Jiwoong's swearing startles him. 

He walks out of his room and finds Jiwoong pacing around. Matthew walks over to him, and once he turns around, Jiwoong looks pissed. 

“What happened?” Matthew asks, taken back. Jiwoong stops and takes a deep breath. 

“I’m completely fucked.” Jiwoong rubs his temple. 

Matthew doesn't know what to say to that, so he watches him silently and waits. Jiwoong drops on the couch and looks up at him tired. 

“I was wrong. The guy I was suspecting of isn't involved, it was a client who was caught and set me up.” Jiwoong explains with a flat voice. “To make things worse, word got out and people are looking for my stash.” 

“Stash?”

“My money.” Jiwoong closes his eyes and groans. 

“Ok, so what exactly does this client has on you?” Matthew frowns, trying to think of a way to help. 

“Him? Nothing. A couple texts.” Jiwoong turns to him. “The cops have my face, the cameras caught me. Because he knew where I'd be and he told them.”  

“Now what?” Matthew sits next to him. 

“Now… I don't know.” Jiwoong shrugs. “I guess I'll have to leave the country after all.” 

“Can you actually do that though?” Matthew eyes him. 

“I can try.” Jiwoong scoffs. “Yeah, I'm fucked.” 

“At this point, isn't it easier to turn yourself in?” Matthew says hesitantly. Jiwoong scowls at him, so he continues before he loses his logical thread. “If you cooperate, they might reduce the sentence.” 

“I’m not going to jail willingly.” Jiwoong looks at him like he was spat on, offended. “If they decide to investigate me, they'd find stuff to get me ten years inside.” 

“Did you kill someone?” Matthew snorts. 

“No, but our justice system takes money laundering a lot seriously.” 

“At least when it's not done by big companies I guess.” Matthew purses his lips. “Well, you're welcome to stay here for however long you need.” 

“I can't just live here forever.” Jiwoong sighs, resting his face on his hands. 

“Yeah, I guess you wouldn't want that.” Matthew exhales. “Take your time anyway. I have no idea what you should do, but I know rushed decisions tend to be wrong, so.” 

“Matthew.” Jiwoong drops a hand to stare at him, serious. 

“What?” Matthew holds his gaze, mind going blank. 

“Thank you.” Jiwoong smiles, it's a small, soft smile, but it's meaningful. 

“You're welcome.” Matthew nods. 

“No, I don't mean just for letting me stay…” Jiwoong shakes his head. “Not once have you treated me poorly because of what I do.”

“Should I treat you badly because you broke the law?” Matthew tilts his head. 

“Yeah, that's actually how normal people work.” Jiwoong chuckles. “You're the odd one.” 

“I mean, I wouldn't be your friend if you hadn't helped me in the first place.” Matthew hums, considering his words. “Theft is not unforgivable for me. It doesn't say that much about your character.”

“My character?” Jiwoong eyes him with amused confusion. 

“Someone can steal for a thousand different reasons, it's not necessarily about their character.” 

“That's a good point.” Jiwoong nods. “I don't think I'm a good person though.” 

“I don't think I care even if you're not.” Matthew shrugs. 

“You don't care?” Jiwoong smirks, leaning back on the couch but keeping his eyes on him. Somehow, it feels like he's toying Matthew, and that's incredibly unfair considering last night's events. 

“Not really.” Matthew gulps. 

“That’s cute.” Jiwoong chuckles, a hypnotic smile on his lips. It's so unfair. 

“Not really.” 

“Sure.” Jiwoong reaches a hand to ruffle his hair. “I'll go get started on dinner.” 

As he watches Jiwoong walk to the kitchen to cook them yet another fantastic dinner, Matthew wishes this can keep going for a bit longer. This weird rush he has every time he's with Jiwoong is something new to him, it'd be a pity to let it go. 

-

For the next few days, it's like they settle into routine. Matthew goes to work and comes back to fresh dinner and a clean house. Jiwoong apparently spends his days taking care of his ‘business’ remotely. 

Although their daily interactions have been limited to conversations over dinner, every little detail is nice to Matthew. It's sort of like they have a schedule they never officially set up, and it works wonders. Matthew does the dishes after dinner while Jiwoong showers, then it's his turn in the bathroom, then they sit in front of the TV for an hour or two before going to bed. 

It's awfully normal. Of course, until it's not. 

The Jurassic flip phone Jiwoong owns rings late at night. Matthew hadn't actually seen it working, so he stays put on the couch as Jiwoong picks it up. 

“Why are you calling this number?” Jiwoong says with a scowl. 

Matthew can't hear what's being said on the other end, but from Jiwoong's expression it can't be good. He pales, color draining from his face as he stands there, cigarette burning away. 

“You have to be fucking kidding me.” Jiwoong tongues his cheeks and takes a deep breath. “I can't drive there right now. You said the cops were showing my face around, how the fuck am I supposed to go pick it up? You’re on the other side of town.” 

The words immediately set off an alarm for Matthew. He gets up, walking towards Jiwoong, and as he approaches he can hear the voice on the other end sounding panicked. 

“Can't you leave it somewhere else? I'll pay you more if you do.” Jiwoong rubs his eyes as the other person probably tells him no. “Fuck. I can't just go there right now.” 

“Hyung.” Matthew puts a hand on his shoulder, making Jiwoong look at him with surprise. He points to himself, and Jiwoong just stares at him for a couple seconds, like he's considering it. 

“You shouldn't be involved.” Jiwoong says, covering the phone. 

“I already am, also, that's my choice. Let me help.” Matthew says firmly. 

“This might be dangerous.” Jiwoong says seriously. 

“Let me help.” Matthew repeats himself, confident. Jiwoong holds his gaze for a moment, then sighs. 

“I'll send someone to get it. Text me the address.” He says on the phone.

The sudden rush that fills Matthew is definitely not normal, he shouldn't be excited to be dragged into a crime scheme. Yet, it is what it is. 

After Jiwoong hangs up, he stares at Matthew for a solid ten seconds without saying anything. Then, it's like he turns on a button.

“You have to be fast on everything. Drive fast, move fast, take the bag and run out of there as quickly as possible.” Jiwoong says, dead serious. “Don't ask questions to anyone, keep them for me. If they ask you anything, don't answer. The only thing you have to say is that Black Cat sent you, nothing else. Don't tell anyone your name and if anything looks wrong, run.” 

“Ok.” Matthew nods. “What exactly am I picking up?”

“A really heavy suitcase, I'll tell you everything later. You have a car, right?” 

“I don't drive much, but yes.” 

“Ok, put on black clothes and a mask. I'll walk with you to the parking lot.” Jiwoong takes a deep breath, clearly thinking about a lot at once. “Also, give me your phone number.” 

“Ok.” Matthew nods, keeping his questions to himself for now. Jiwoong is already overwhelmed, he can wait to get answers. 

Everything moves fast from there on. He changes and gets down to the parking lot within five minutes, all the while Jiwoong keeps instructing him on how to act. The most important seems to be confidence, Matthew is supposed to act like he knows what he's doing, no matter if he has no idea what's going on. 

To be honest, he's not really worried about his safety, even though logically he knows this isn't a safe situation. If he succeeds, it'll be like paying back the debt he has with Jiwoong, and the thought of being seen on equal footing sort of thrills him. 

Once he's in the driver's seat with the GPS set and Jiwoong looking at him dripping with anxiety, it's like he's fueled with conviction. It's ok even if he regrets this, because right now he just wants to do something for him. 

“Take care.” Jiwoong says as steps back from the car window. 

“I will. Be right back.” Matthew nods, looking ahead and driving off without wasting time. 

As he drives through the city, heart racing and mind a complete mess, Matthew moves robotically. He follows the GPS instructions, and every time he passes by a police station or an official vehicle it's like he's pulled back to reality for a second. 

It takes him about thirty minutes to get to his destination, a gardening shop. It's an old small building, multiple flowers and plants on the outside, hiding away the chipped painting. Anxious, Matthew doesn't stall. He pulls up his mask and gets out of the car, walking inside quickly as he was instructed. 

The inside looks just as ancient as the outside, warm lights and dusty shelves with gardening tools, small flower beds spread around the room, an old trot song plays faintly. He heads straight to the counter, keeping in mind Jiwoong's warnings. 

There's no one around to be seen, but there's a ring bell on top of the counter, so Matthew presses it. It takes a couple seconds before he hears some rustling on the back of the store, and a man comes out to greet him. He looks to be about his age, young, tall, and a polite smile perfectly trained. 

“Welcome, how can I help you?” He says in a great customer service voice. 

“Black Cat sent me.” Matthew says, keeping his voice flat and trying to pass off as someone getting an everyday errand done. The guy behind the counter stiffens, looking over his shoulders before bringing his attention back to him.

“Wait a minute.” He says, going back inside and disappearing from view. 

Matthew looks around, the windows leading to the outside are glossy, so there's no way to see anything, but there's also no signs of any trouble. The shop however, looks creepier the more he stares. 

All the shelves are fully stocked, and the flowers are pretty, but there's a feeling of abandonment nonetheless. He can just tell a customer hasn't set foot in here for a while. 

The man comes out of the back a couple minutes later, struggling to carry an enormous heavy looking traveling suitcase. He strolls it to Matthew's side and exhales, straining up to stare at him. 

“Make sure you're not being followed on your way back. Some people were lurking around here today.” He says. 

Matthew nods, turning his attention to the bag. He takes a deep breath and lifts it up with both hands, still surprised with how actually heavy it is. Still keeping his composure, he pretends he's not having a hard time and walks out the shop with it. He can feel the man's eyes following him, but he doesn't say anything else and just leaves quickly. 

After putting the suitcase on the back of the car, he looks around the street and doesn't spot anyone. His racing heart feels like a bigger problem at this point, so he just gets into the driver's seat and gets out of there as fast as he can. 

Taking the warnings seriously, and not wanting to mess this up, Matthew takes the longer way home, making sure he's not being followed. The drive back is definitely where it hits him how insane he is for doing this. He doesn't even know what he's carrying inside his car. If one of the police vehicles he's passed by decided to pull him over, he'd be done for. 

Thankfully, he gets to his parking spot with only sweaty hands and an adrenaline rush. Matthew stops the car and takes a deep breath, he looks at the suitcase in the back and it's filled with a feeling of accomplishment. It's been only an hour since he left, and it was so fast it feels like even less. He pulls up his phone and texts Jiwoong to come down. 

After a couple minutes, Jiwoong is running out of breath next to his car. Matthew giggles as he steps out. 

“Breathe. You're the one carrying this upstairs.” Matthew pats his back. 

“Did you have any problems? Anyone following you?” 

“No, it was fine. Didn't see anyone but the guy that gave me the suitcase.” Matthew says, sort of proud but not wanting to let it show. 

“Thank you so much.” Jiwoong exhales in relief, rushing a hand through his hair. “Your house might be smelling really bad right now though, sorry.” 

“What?” 

“Let me take this upstairs then we can talk.” Jiwoong ignores his confusion and goes on to take the gigantic suitcase. 

Even he struggles to carry it, but still does it without complaining. The ride up the elevator is pretty awkward, and Matthew gets what he meant about the smell then. 

When they walk inside the apartment, it's like someone made a barbecue inside. The windows are all open, but the smell of smoke is thick. 

“Sorry, I was anxious.” Jiwoong eyes him, putting the suitcase down next to the center table. 

“Uh, yeah. I can tell.” Matthew scrunches his nose. “Ok, what's up with this suitcase?” 

Jiwoong takes a deep breath and sits on the floor, Matthew follows him, watching as he unzips the suitcase. Jiwoong makes a pause before opening it, looking up at him with a smirk. 

Amongst the things he was expecting, money was definitely the best option, but alongside the piles of cash inside the suitcase, there's actual gold. Slim golden bars that could fit into his hand, stacking up on a corner. 

“Is that fucking gold?” Matthew gapes. 

“Yes.” Jiwoong chuckles. 

“What the fuck. You're actually rich.”

“It's not like I can buy anything I want with this money. It'd be pretty difficult to use everything without raising suspicions.” 

“So, what are your plans for it?” Matthew looks up at him. 

“I have to take this somewhere safe, but I'm not sure how I'm doing that right now. I can't really take this on a bus with me, or rent a car on my name.” Jiwoong sighs. 

“Yeah, we both know I'm doing that, so just move on from there.” Matthew rolls his eyes. 

“For real, you’re not normal.” Jiwoong laughs.

“I know.” Matthew dismisses his comment. “Then?” 

“Ok, I have a house at Gangwondo. It's about a three hour drive, we can make it on the weekend?” 

“Sounds good.” Matthew nods. “But you're locking this away, and then what?” 

“Then I have to find a way to get the police off me.” Jiwoong grunts. “I'm still fucked, but if I get arrested my money will be safe.” 

“What if they find your house at Gangwondo?” 

“They won't. It's not under my name.” Jiwoong exhales. “We should go to bed, it's late and you have work tomorrow.” 

“I don't think I can sleep.” Matthew huffs. 

“Honestly me either.” Jiwoong eyes him. “Whiskey?”

“Yeah.” Matthew nods. 

“I'm a bad influence on you.” Jiwoong giggles. 

“You think so?” Matthew scoffs, laying on his back on the floor. Jiwoong gets up to fetch them the drink. 

As the adrenaline rush fades away, he's still left with the steady pumping of his heart in abnormal rhythm. He just carried a pile of cash across the city, and he feels like he could do it again. 

He sits up to get the glass offered to him, resting his back on the couch. Despite having the whole room available, Jiwoong sits a bit too close to him so their knees bump. Matthew downs the drink in a go, and Jiwoong watches him with wide eyes. 

“Are you sure you're ok?” 

“I am.” Matthew giggles. “It's just… I think I'm really insane.” 

“Yeah, I've been saying.” Jiwoong shakes his head. 

“How much is on the suitcase?” Matthew rests his head on his knees to look up at him. 

“Almost a billion.” Jiwoong sips his drink.

“Wow. You don't even have to keep working.” Matthew scoffs. 

“I plan on living until I'm old and cranky, so not yet.” Jiwoong laughs. 

“Why do you do it?” Matthew watches him, not minding if he's staring and taking in all the little changes in Jiwoong's expression. He considers the question for a moment, biting his lips and furrowing his brows. 

“It's fun.” Jiwoong says, turning to smile at him. “My first client was a friend from the sharks, he hired me because he was paranoid that a colleague of his had stolen his favourite sapphire ring. 

“He couldn't exactly go to the cops, and I didn't trust him at first, he had no actual evidence, so the moment I found the ring inside that guy's vault, it was really satisfying. That moment made me want to do it again.” 

The glint in his eyes says a lot to Matthew, and he gets it. 

“You felt like you could do anything.” Matthew says quietly. 

“Exactly.” Jiwoong nods, studying him. “Is that how you're feeling?” 

“Yeah.” Matthew smiles. “I must've gone crazy.” 

“It's fairly normal for people to do unusual things after experiencing trauma. Your life changed a lot in the past few months.” Jiwoong says calmly. 

“It's not about that though.” Matthew scowls. “I mean, part of it is, but… It's not about what he did.” 

“What is it, then?” Jiwoong tilts his head. 

“It's about me.” Matthew exhales, trying to organize his thoughts. “I keep asking myself why I was even in love with him. Why didn't I listen to Taerae? Why did I let him humiliate me so many times without saying a word? Why did I think that was what I was supposed to do?” 

“You're a victim. He manipulated you, you shouldn't blame yourself.” 

“What makes me mad is that I kinda knew that.” Matthew crosses his arms above his knees to hide his face. “I already knew I wouldn't be happy with him, but I kept pretending, and now when I look back I can't tell why. I didn’t even miss him after everything, not for a day.”

“He trapped you, be it through routine or emotional exchanges. It's hard to get out of inertia.” Jiwoong sighs.

“But I've been like this my whole life. That's what I hate most, and that's what I think tonight was about.” Matthew looks up, eyeing Jiwoong.

“You've been like what?”

“I just go along with what people want me to do. I went to a university my parents chose, and I work at a company I couldn't care less about, doing things I find useless. This is an adventure in the middle of the garbage that is my life.” Matthew rambles, resting his head back on the couch. “I don't want to keep going like this.” 

“And helping out a criminal is something you want to do?” Jiwoong chuckles. 

“Yes, actually it is. It's sort of breaking a cycle.” Matthew snorts, siding him a smile. “I did it not because you expected me to, but because I wanted to.” 

“Thanks for that.” Jiwoong nods, smiling, then holds his gaze for a second. “I think I misjudged you.” 

“How so?” Matthew raises his brows. 

“Well, I thought you were just a cute little guy, but you're so much more interesting than I could've imagined.”

The way Jiwoong looks at him cannot be platonic, and he's almost sure he isn't projecting that. Matthew lets his eyes wander down to his lips, and Jiwoong licks them just to spite him, because once he looks back up, he smirks.

“You shouldn't do that if you don't want me making moves on you.” Matthew warns him, gulping down his shame as Jiwoong’s eyes on him draw out all his courage. 

“Who says I don't want that?” Jiwoong says, almost daring him. 

“You didn't seem to want it last time.” Matthew keeps his voice calm, heart racing again, but in an entire different way than earlier. 

“I didn't.” Jiwoong admits. “Not after you'd been drinking so much. I thought you were using me as a rebound.” 

“Oh, please.” Matthew rolls his eyes. “I've been thinking about your face ever since I first saw you at that shabby building. You're far too handsome to be insecure about -” 

His words are swallowed by Jiwoong's lips. It's a quick match, a soft and warm touch that has him freezing. He stares at Jiwoong as he leans back, smiling dumbly. 

“Sorry, is this ok?” Jiwoong looks down to his lips, and their faces are inches apart so Matthew can feel his breath. "If you're not ready-"

This time he's the one moving forward, but he doesn't end it with a peck. Matthew goes in with hunger, and he kisses him like he's been dying to do for a long time. He tastes the liquor in his tongue, and the bitter tobacco that clings to him. Under any other circumstances, he would've hated it, but right now it just works.

Jiwoong's hands soon move to pull him in, and Matthew finds himself climbing on top of him. He sits on his lap, not breaking their kiss, wrapping his arms around his neck and running his hands through his hair. Jiwoong holds his waist, moving one hand under his shirt. His fingers are cold against his skin, and it sends shivers all over his body. 

“Cute.” Jiwoong giggles into his lips. 

“Am I?” Matthew hums, pecking his lips and trailing down kisses to his jaw. He moves his hips slightly, enough to cause some friction. Jiwoong immediately stills him by grabbing his ass with both hands. 

“I'll stop you right there.” Jiwoong clears his throat, moving his hands up again. 

“Why?” Matthew lifts his head up from his neck with a pout.

“Let’s take one step at a time. I might catch feelings for you too fast.” Jiwoong's eyes are smiling as he says it, and it's even more devastating that he's looking at him like that. 

“Oh.” Matthew stares at him, feeling safe and comfortable in a criminal’s lap. “I'm afraid that ship has sailed for me.” 

“Yeah, figured. You keep staring at me no matter what I'm doing, it's so annoying.” Jiwoong giggles, pecking his cheek. “Did you have a hard time resisting a criminal because of this face?” 

“The fact you're a criminal was never a problem. I had to reconsider after learning you don't like sweet potatoes.” Matthew snorts, resting his head on his shoulder. 

“What do you even like about me?” Jiwoong snickers, rubbing circles on his back.  

“Are you seriously asking?” Matthew frowns, looking up to find Jiwoong seriously confused. “Oh, you're for real. I can't believe this.” 

“What? I didn't mean to offend you, it's not that I think you only care about looks. It's just that I don't think I have much to offer you aside from it.”

“I'm offended you think so lowly of yourself.” Matthew gapes at him. “You can't be serious. You're literally the most perfect man I've ever met.” 

“Cut it.” Jiwoong rolls his eyes. 

“No, I'm for real.” Matthew insists, a bit exasperated at this man's nerves. “You've been cooking and cleaning for me and calling it the minimum. You always ask me about my day and how I'm feeling, even though you could just ignore me if you wanted to. You're smart and read more books than I have, funny, considerate. The list just goes on. If we don't consider your illegal activities, you're one of the most decent people I know.” 

“That's a really high compliment.” Jiwoong giggles. “But you should really consider the illegal activities.” 

“Well, you're decent even with that.” Matthew shrugs. 

“We should sleep.” Jiwoong says that, but he pulls him in for another kiss. It's a bit slower, lazier, but it warms him up inside just the same. 

“How about we go to my bed…” Matthew says between kisses. “...and we keep kissing until one of us falls asleep?” 

“That sounds like a great way to fall asleep.” Jiwoong smirks. “Hold tight.” 

Before Matthew can think it through, Jiwoong is lifting him up with him. He hangs onto him not to fall down, wrapping his legs around him. 

As he's carried to bed, with gentle touches and pretty words, Matthew is filled with so much joy he can't possibly control his silly smile. It's more than enough. 

-

The three hour long ride ends at a trail up the mountain, and they arrive at the isolated cottage just before midday. It's a simple wooden construction, no more than a hundred square meters, a single floor, but very pretty. 

Big windows and running glass doors make it so they can see the living room from the outside, its furniture covered in white cloth. There's nothing but trees around, but once they step up the deck, they have a gorgeous view from the valley. 

“This place is amazing.” Matthew stares at the view gaping. 

“During winter it's even prettier, but we'd be six feet under snow right now.” Jiwoong chuckles. 

“I'll have to come back to see it.” Matthew feels awkward as soon as he says it, so he clears his throat and moves on before Jiwoong comments on it. “Should we head inside and start cleaning? I don't think I can stay the night with all that dust.” 

“Yeah, I'll take the living room and the bathroom, you take the bedroom?” 

“Sure.” Matthew nods, then looks back to the car. “Should we take the suitcase inside first?” 

“I'll bring it up later.” Jiwoong shakes his head, unlocking the front door for them. Matthew follows him inside. 

The place is pretty simple, there's no decorations on the walls, just the basic furniture. Somehow the wood gives it some personality, along with the fluffy tapestries in every room. 

They get the protection capes out of everything pretty quickly, and since it's a small house, they're done dusting everything and changing sheets not so long after. Once they're done, they sit outside on the deck to rest and eat the lunch boxes Jiwoong prepared.

“So, whose house is this?” Matthew asks as he munches, looking out to the beautiful valley. 

“Mine, but technically from a friend of mine. Remember the guy from the sapphire ring?” Jiwoong asks, he nods. “This house was his payment for the ring. I was written into his will, so when he's gone it'll be legally mine.” 

“A whole house?” Matthew gasps. 

“Well, the ring was worth more to him than this house.” Jiwoong shrugs. “He has a lot of money, like a lot. This small property in the middle of nowhere is not an important asset.” 

“Wow.” Matthew gapes, looking around and wondering if crime really doesn't pay out. 

“Aren’t your parents rich? I didn't expect you to react like I first did when I came here.” Jiwoong giggles. 

“Well, they weren't born rich, they got rich.” Matthew says, swallowing his food before continuing. “It's not like I'm a chaebol, they're not billionaires, they just manage to live comfortably.” 

“They're not giving you a vacation house anytime soon then?” Jiwoong teases him. 

“I pay my own rent. I'll buy one myself.” Matthew tries to kick his sheen but misses. “Looks like criminals are doing way better than me. This is what this country has become.” 

“It’s been like that since forever. The most successful of us tend to run the country.” Jiwoong chuckles. 

“Good one.” Matthew snorts. 

They finish eating and Jiwoong decides to show him around. There's a tiny stream just next to the trail, and they follow it up the mountain for a bit, trying to get to a viewpoint to the whole valley. 

When Matthew slips by the water, falling on his butt, Jiwoong offers a hand to get him up and simply doesn't let go anymore. They walk with their hands intertwined, and he feels like he's in a movie for a while. 

Once they get back to the cottage, Matthew takes a shower and changes into warmer clothes. Although it's not exactly cold, the wind is chilly by late afternoon. Which is why he's surprised when Jiwoong walks out the bathroom with a tank top, apparently he doesn't get cold. 

They sit outside again, this time to watch the sunset while they drink tea and snack on the pastries they brought. As the sunlight tints the sky and the valley below with the most beautiful shades of orange and pink, they sit in silence with their amazement. 

“Should I just live here?” Matthew exhales as the sun sinks on the horizon, and darkness starts taking over the valley. 

“I'm not letting you steal my house.” Jiwoong chuckles. “It'd get boring after a few weeks. There's nothing else to do but watch the scenery.” 

“You can't say no, I know all your weaknesses.” Matthew smirks. 

“Well, you can stay, but only if we bet on how long you're staying.”

“There's an internet signal, I could live here.” Matthew shrugs, then looks out to the now pitch black darkness surrounding them. “But I have a job, so.” 

“Right.” Jiwoong eyes him, chuckling. “How's your job by the way? You haven't said much about it.” 

“Fine.” Matthew grimaces, not wanting to be reminded. “There's nothing to talk about, really. My life is basically filling sheets and tuning out gossip.” 

“Have you ever thought about changing careers?” 

“Are you trying to recruit me?” Matthew raises an eyebrow at him. 

“No. I'm just wondering if you know you're too special to waste your life in a nine to five.” Jiwoong shrugs. 

“I think you're too special to waste your life in crime. Where's the middle ground?” 

“Working with something we love, probably.” Jiwoong hums. 

“But you said you like stealing.” Matthew eyes him. 

“Yes.” Jiwoong nods, considering his words. “But the stealing part is just one step of all I have to do.” 

“What else do you have to do?” Matthew frowns.

“Talking to clients. The sort of people I attract with this line of work are not fun.” Jiwoong sighs. “Then the work itself is not just barging in and taking things. I have to study their habits, schedules, make a plan to walk in and out without being noticed. Sometimes things don't go as planned, and I have to be prepared for that too. Then, selling off stuff and getting rid of evidence, which is its own problem.” 

“That’s a lot.” Matthew stares at him, a little taken back. It's hard for him to imagine Jiwoong doing all these things, even though he knows he's done everything and more. 

“Yeah, working for rich and dangerous people isn't exactly nice.” 

“Do you regret it?” 

“Not really.” Jiwoong exhales. “I don't regret my life choices, but I regret not thinking them through at times.” 

“How so?” 

“I hate being impulsive.” Jiwoong sighs. “I took my last job because he offered me too much money, and instead of suspecting it, I fell for the bait without thinking.” 

“Well, your first payment was a house. I wouldn't be suspecting great amounts either.” Matthew jokes. 

“I was fooled by that job into thinking this life would be fun. A scam.” Jiwoong snorts. 

“Should we both retire to the woods?” 

“I actually thought of staying here until things calm down, but this far from the city would be more of a pain.” Jiwoong sulks. “Also, if they find this place I'd lose both my money and my friend, so I'd rather not risk it.” 

“He’d probably write you off the will.” Matthew nods. “Speaking of money, should we take it inside? The day is starting to catch up with me.” 

“That's ok, I'll do it.” Jiwoong gets up and stretches. “Can you leave the door open? To the bedroom too.” 

“On it.” Matthew gets up too, moving to get things done. 

Inside the bedroom, he sits on the bed with his legs crossed and waits for Jiwoong, wondering where that mountain of cash will fit into. There's not much furniture in the bedroom either, just the bed, a drawer and a small desk.

As Jiwoong gets to the bedroom carrying the big suitcase, Matthew just watches. He moves to the drawer and pushes it forward, and it takes Matthew a moment to realize that underneath it there's a hatchet. It's perfectly blended in the wooden floor, like they cut a piece of the board to make the lid. A small crook serves as a handle, and Jiwoong pulls on it. 

Underneath the hatchet, there's a safe cemented to the ground. Jiwoong puts in the password and unlocks it, opening the suitcase next to it and starting to empty the cash there. Matthew is sort of awed, so he keeps watching for a while before realizing he should be helping. 

Sitting on the floor next to Jiwoong, he moves the money to a new neatly organised pile inside the safe. 

“How are you ever laundering all this money?” Matthew huffs. 

“I'm not. I don't have the right friends to do that, which is why I have to hide it.” Jiwoong chuckles. “I give myself a very generous salary every month, but I'm earning way more than I could ever deposit on a bank without raising suspicions.” 

“So, you can only spend your money on illegal trades? Sounds like it loses value.”

“Basically.” Jiwoong shrugs. “I don't really need all this money. I'm living comfortably without a luxury apartment.” 

“We could start a company, then you can use my account as well.” Matthew says playful. 

“And I'm sure you wouldn't ask for a massive percentage of everything that went through.” Jiwoong laughs. 

“Of course not. Just enough so I wouldn't need a job.” Matthew giggles. 

“Don't play about that, I might start making plans.” Jiwoong shakes his head. 

“Why don't you want to make plans? Are you so sure we won't work out?” Matthew says, a little bitter. 

“Is there a way we could?” Jiwoong eyes him. “I don't think so.”

“I'm saying I'm willing to come into your world.” 

“I don't want you to do that though.” Jiwoong sighs. “I guess I'm a hypocrite.” 

“Yeah. I guess.” Matthew tongues his cheek.  

“I'm not worth your energy, Matthew. You should have a better future.” 

“And you know what's the better future.” Matthew rolls his eyes. 

“I know it's not one with someone you can't take outside or introduce to your parents.” Jiwoong exhales. 

“Fuck. You shouldn't say this shit now.” Matthew rushes a hand through his hair, frustrated. 

“How would I know we'd get to this?” 

“No, I mean you should've waited longer.” Matthew snorts, still angry. “I can't ask a guy that has known me for a month to change for me.” 

“You're really weird.” Jiwoong chuckles, closing the safe again. Matthew punches his arm.

“We could live an epic love story but you're a coward.” Matthew pouts. 

“Honey, we are living an epic love story.” Jiwoong giggles, taking his hand to kiss the back of it. Matthew watches him and color rises to his face. “It just won't have a happy ending.” 

“Rascal.” Matthew lets his eyes drop to his lips. 

He's not sure who moves first, but they're kissing. Although it starts out desperate, it's like they calm each other down until it's a lazy kiss, as if they both want to make every touch last a bit longer. 

As Matthew wraps his arms around his waist, Jiwoong pushes him forward, and he ends up laying on his back. Their giggles interrupt the kiss, but once Jiwoong leans back to take off his shirt while still caging him between his legs, Matthew feels personally attacked. 

“Weren’t we going to take it slow?” Matthew scoffs, admiring the work of art that are his muscles. 

“You’re right. I think it's too late for that.” Jiwoong leans back in, smirking. “I’m gonna start living in the moment.” 

“Really?” Matthew hums, hands going back to his waist, brushing his fingers against the warm skin. “How convenient.”

“That's your fault. You keep seducing me.” Jiwoong pecks him. 

“I do not.” Matthew rolls his eyes. 

“You keep looking at me like that. It's been really hard to ignore it.” Jiwoong chuckles, tracing his fingers across his jaw. 

“Like I want to kiss every part of your body and have my way?” 

“Exactly.” Jiwoong nods, capturing his lips in yet another kiss. 

This time Matthew lets his hands run loose, thrilled with the way his skin feels against his own. Jiwoong moves his lips to his jaw, and eventually his neck, and his kisses get Matthew making weird noises. 

Their make out session on the ground goes on for a few minutes, until Matthew has an involuntary response to Jiwoong biting his earlobe, and ends up hitting his head on the floor. After apologising and realizing he's fine, Jiwoong laughs at him. 

They move to bed then, and instead of letting Matthew get up on his own, Jiwoong picks him up from the ground princess style. Jiwoong puts him on the bed and immediately cages him again. With a smirk on his lips, Jiwoong tugs his shirt, and Matthew just follows his lead and sits up to take it off. 

Their eyes meet again, and it sends a jolt of electricity through his body. Jiwoong leans in again, intentful, but before he takes his whole attention, Matthew puts his hands over his nice chest. 

“My bag.” Matthew gulps as his breath mingles with Jiwoong's. 

“Oh, you came prepared?” Jiwoong smirks, bumping their foreheads. 

“I mean, you're the one that asked me to come to an isolated cottage in the woods.” Matthew rolls his eyes, chuckling. 

“I'm glad we're here. I won't have to hold back.” Jiwoong pecks him, giggling. 

“Hold back? What are you, superman?” Matthew slaps his chest. 

“It’d be a shame if you couldn't make as much noise as you want to.” Jiwoong pecks him again. “I'll go get it.” 

Matthew lays on his back with a dumb smile as Jiwoong gets up. It's still hard to believe what's happening to him. Honestly, being with Jiwoong was more of an impossible fantasy up until last week. Now, he's hearing things like that. 

When Jiwoong comes back, holding the small flask of lubricant and condoms, Matthew feels his face heating up. 

“Are you getting embarrassed now?” Jiwoong chuckles at him, dropping the things on the pillows and laying next to him again. He puts a hand over Matthew's stomach, while using the other to support himself. 

“I didn't actually think I was going to bag you.” Matthew scoffs, turning sideways to stare at him and reaching a hand to ruffle his hair. 

“Too handsome?” Jiwoong slowly leans in. 

“Too incredibly handsome.” Matthew nods, meeting him halfway. 

This time, Matthew pushes him down, now being the one to cage him. He peppers kisses down to his collarbones, then he pulls back and takes a look at him. Jiwoong is just smirking up at him, completely mischievous. 

The volume on their pants is already pretty noticeable, so Matthew tugs on the seam of his sweatpants. Jiwoong doesn't hesitate, lifting his body so Matthew can pull it off. The bulge under his tight briefs makes Matthew gulp.

With a swift move, Jiwoong pulls him down, kissing him with passion. Matthew takes the opportunity to touch him, palming his hard member through the cloth. Jiwoong moans against his lips, which makes Matthew grab a bit harder. 

“Take it off.” Jiwoong mumbles, but he doesn't really give Matthew any space to back away, lips moving with hunger. 

So, Matthew just pulls his briefs down, freeing his cock and properly wrapping his hand around it. Jiwoong's breathing gets heavier as he strokes him, and Matthew takes the moment to pull back and watch him for a second. 

Jiwoong looks up at him with serious eyes, face completely flushed and his hair already a mess. Matthew doesn't get to enjoy the view for long, as Jiwoong clicks his tongue at him and turns them around. 

He loses the underwear, tugging off Matthew's too, all with a wicked smile. As he's stripped naked, Matthew is terribly embarrassed under Jiwoong's stare, but also, he feels desired. 

When Jiwoong kisses him again, their cocks rub against each other, making Matthew pant against his lips. He ends up spreading his legs for Jiwoong to press his body on his, and the friction alone gets him dizzy. 

As their kiss deepens, Jiwoong moves his hands to stroke them both at the same time. Then, his kisses start to go lower, and his hand stops as Jiwoong trails kisses down his chest. 

All Matthew can do is grab onto his hair as Jiwoong's mouth approaches his crotch, leaving wet kisses on the base of his cock. He watches as Jiwoong licks him, head rolling back when he holds onto the base to play with the tip. 

A string of curses and gibberish leaves his lips as Jiwoong swallows him, wetting his cock with his saliva. He starts bobbing his head, engulfing him each time a bit more, until his nose rubs against Matthew's stomach and completely wrecks him. 

The only thing Matthew can do is moan and pull on his hair, as he starts curling his toes. 

“Wait, Jiwoon-” Matthew pants, tugging his hair a bit harder, and getting him to stop. He looks down to find Jiwoong staring up at him with a smirk. 

“Already?” Jiwoong licks his lips, now pinkier than usual. 

“I haven't had sex in so long, I'm basically a virgin at this point.” Matthew snorts. “I'm sensitive.” 

“We don't have to go all the way if you don't want to.”

“Oh, no. You're fucking me tonight. I was promised things.” Matthew laughs, and Jiwoong falls on top of him as he giggles. 

“Ok, then let's get you prepared for me.” Jiwoong pecks him, then reaches for the lubricant. 

Matthew watches as he pours some onto his fingers, and when their eyes meet again, he can't help but laugh. 

“Why are you making me laugh at a time like this?” Matthew nudges his shoulder. 

“I was trying to be sexy, you're the one making it funny.” Jiwoong chuckles, peppering kisses on his face. 

“You don't have to try.” Matthew wraps his arms around his neck, pulling him in again. 

Jiwoong slowly moves his hand to his thigh, sliding down until his finger rubs against Matthew's ass, the cold gel making him shiver. 

“May I?” Jiwoong chuckles against his lips. 

“Stop making me laugh and fuck me already.” Matthew's laugh is cut in the middle as Jiwoong does as he says and lets his finger in. He pushes in slowly, letting Matthew get used to it, not breaking their kiss. 

It doesn't do much for him at first, but once Jiwoong puts in a second one and starts actually moving, he's squirming and pushing up his hips in no time. Jiwoong is definitely leaving marks on his neck, but Matthew can't really be bothered.

By the time he's on the third one, Matthew is already a mess underneath him. He keeps trying to get more friction by thrusting his hips along Jiwoong's rhythm, but it's just not enough. Jiwoong seems to realize it too. 

“Ready?” Jiwoong whispers to his ear, and this time it's really not funny. 

“Please.” Matthew whines.

Without wasting time, Jiwoong grabs the condom and stands on his knees. He opens it up and smirks at him. 

“Wanna put it on me?” 

At this point, Matthew just wants him to rail him, but it's a good chance to provoke him a bit, so he takes it. Sitting up, he wraps his hand around Jiwoong's incredibly hard cock, licking his lips as he looks back up at him. Jiwoong just watches with a really dirty smile. 

“Even your dick is pretty, did you know that?” Matthew slides his hand, stroking him slowly. 

“Is it? I think it's fairly normal.” Jiwoong tongues his cheek. 

“It's pretty big, the color is nice.” Matthew rolls his finger around the tip. 

“Can we do the review afterwards?” Jiwoong grunts.

“I'm having fun here.” Matthew chuckles, but he doesn't stall any longer. 

He rolls the condom on him, and once he's done, Jiwoong dives in to kiss him. It doesn't get tiring, even though their lips have been at it for some time now. Jiwoong grabs his legs to position himself between them again, his hands clearly taking the opportunity to feel up his thighs. 

As he lines up, his tip giving Matthew a warning as it rubs against him, Jiwoong murmurs to his ear how good he looks. When he pushes in, Jiwoong looks for Matthew's lips again, but he's not in condition to retribute any kisses. 

It burns as Jiwoong goes all in, but then he stops, letting Matthew relax around him. Matthew is a mess of pants and moans, any slight movement being felt inside of him, and Jiwoong keeps whispering nice things to him.

“Move.” Matthew tugs his neck, and Jiwoong obliges immediately. 

His thrusts pick up pace slowly, his hands around his waist keeping him still. Loud moans start escaping Matthew's lips, so whiny he barely recognises himself. As he speeds up, Jiwoong starts swearing a lot. 

“Fuck- you're so fucking hot.” He kisses his jaw. “So good, fuck.” 

“Jiwoon- higher.” Matthew mumbles, voice all mushy. 

Picking up his thighs, Jiwoong raises Matthew's hips and then it's like bells start ringing. He hits him just on the right spot, repeatedly. With some distance between their faces, Matthew can't really hold onto him, so he ends up grabbing the sheets with one hand, while the other covers his mouth. 

Jiwoong has none of that, quickly grabbing his hand and interlocking their fingers. His eyes stare straight at him as he pounds on him, and it's what gets him off the edge. 

“I'm gonna cum-” Matthew cries, actual tears escaping his eyes. 

“Go on, I'm close.” 

Jiwoong gives a final speed up, and it gets Matthew cumming all over his own chest. He feels like he's floating for a few moments, as pleasure takes over every crook of his body. 

For a second, he thinks he might've passed out, but then Jiwoong's lazy kiss to his collarbones ground him again. However, he has no strength whatsoever to move.

“You ok?” Jiwoong rubs his nose against his, smiling. 

“I'm amazing.” Matthew snorts. 

“You definitely are.” Jiwoong giggles, pecking him. “We have to clean you up, can you stand?” 

“Give a minute.” Matthew closes his eyes, letting his body come down the rush. 

“I’ll go get a towel.” Jiwoong laughs, getting off the bed. 

Matthew opens his eyes to stare up at the ceiling, a smile on his lips. As he lays there waiting, he wonders if he ever felt this way, and it sort of sours his mood when he realizes that the answer is no. Sex was either a reward or a task in his last relationship, never something so… honest. 

“What's with that face?” Jiwoong eyes him as he walks back in. 

“Nothing.” Matthew watches him sit down, a wet towel on hand. 

“Really? Nothing?” Jiwoong hums, cleaning up his chest with gentle moves. 

“I just…” Matthew purses his lips. “I wish we had a way of making it work.” 

“Oh.” Jiwoong exhales. “Me too.” 

“Really?” Matthew raises his brows. 

“Why are you surprised?” Jiwoong chuckles, shaking his head. “You're one of a kind, Matthew. I don't think I'm ever finding anyone like you.” 

“Oh.” Matthew keeps his face blank but he's melting on the inside. 

After cleaning his chest, Jiwoong wraps around his waist, using him as a pillow. They lay there in silence, Matthew playing with his hair, and Jiwoong tracing his fingers on his skin. There's nothing to be said, nothing they don't already know.

“I'll head outside to smoke real quick.” Jiwoong breaks the silence after a few minutes. 

“I'll come with.” Matthew stretches. 

They put on their clothes back on and head outside, Matthew taking the blanket to wrap around himself. The night sky is absolutely astonishing, more stars than he has ever seen.

“Matthew-ya.” Jiwoong leans on him, bumping their heads. 

“Uhm?” 

“I'm really glad we met.” Jiwoong sighs.

“Of course you are. Who else would've hidden you from the cops?” Matthew smiles. 

“You're the first person to actually have me consider quitting.” Jiwoong says quietly, and Matthew knows that's serious enough. 

“Good.” Matthew reaches for his free hand, locking their fingers. 

-

He stops tapping his feet once again, getting annoyed by himself and hoping Taerae hasn't caught up with his anxiety yet. All he wants is to go home to get some hugs and kisses after a really bad day at work. 

Taerae dragged him to a restaurant with a call out of the blue, and Matthew tried to say no a couple times, but he knows when his best friend's insistence has reason. However, he hasn't been enlightened on what that reason is yet, and their food is taking too long. 

“Are you going to tell me why you were so insistent on hanging out today?” Matthew sighs, eyeing Taerae. 

“Just missed you.” Taerae purses his lips. “And I heard some gossip you might want to know, or not.” 

“What gossip?” Matthew raises his brows. 

“I have a friend who's friends with a prosecutor, and he told me they plan to go for fifteen years.” Taerae says quietly. “It’s the minimum.” 

“Can he ask for reductions?” A bitter taste takes over his mouth. 

“Yes.” Taerae nods. 

“They don't care.” Matthew scoffs, sort of feeling like he was slapped in the face. 

“I’m sorry.” Taerae bites his lips. “He deserved worse.” 

“Fuck him. I hope he never gets back up from this.” Matthew huffs. 

“Amen.” Taerae sighs. “How have you been doing lately? Still not up for some clubbing?” 

“Have I ever been up to it?” Matthew snorts. “I had a really shitty day today, but I'm fine overall.” 

“What happened today?” 

“I think one of my coworkers found out about the case. They were talking about exes and she kept giving me weird looks and making out of hand comments.” Matthew rolls his eyes. "Maybe I'm just paranoid." 

“And you're not freaking out about it?” Taerae squints.

“I think I'm getting used to it.” Matthew sighs. “It sucks, but I can't expect to keep it a secret. It was big news, and it's still fresh.” 

“Weird.” Taerae tilts his head. “You're too calm and collected about this.”

“Do you want me to be freaking out?” Matthew clears his throat. “Shouldn't you be happy I'm starting to get over it?” 

“I am happy about it. I just wanna know how it got to this.”

“I don't know.” Matthew shrugs. “I just stopped caring about what people think. I should care about the opinion of people I respect.” 

“Oh. I see.” Taerae sips his soda and nods. “When did you two fuck?” 

“What?” Matthew chokes on nothings, coughing to recover his breath. 

“Did you think I'd buy that? I know you.” Taerae snorts. “How was it?” 

“How did you even…” Matthew gapes at his best friend, not knowing how to talk about it. 

“Oh, please. I didn't believe your ‘just friends’ discourse for a second. Just tell me everything.” 

“Everything?” Matthew clears his throat again. “Uhm… Where do I start…”

“From the beginning.” Taerae studies him. “You're suspicious. Spill it.”

“Well, so remember how we told you we met at the apartment complex?” Matthew steals his soda to gulp down the block on his throat. 

“Yeah, so? Was it a lie?” 

“No, but he wasn't living there like it might've been implied.” Matthew avoids his gaze. “He was there only once.” 

“Just out with it.” Taerae watches him with disbelief, like he can tell where this is going. 

“Do you remember when I told you I was looking for the burglar?” Matthew purses his lips as Taerae has a breakdown through his eyes in the next ten seconds. 

“Matthew, what the fuck.” Taerae rushes a hand through his hair, looking at him like he's insane. “I thought I was about to hear he's married or something.” 

“Look, it's not as bad as it sounds.” Matthew takes a deep breath, trying to think of how to tell this story without sounding insane. “He needed a place to crash, and he's actually a really good person.” 

“Except he's a fucking criminal.” Taerae shout whispers. 

“He's a burglar, not a gang member.” Matthew sulks. “What he does will never come close to what Jiho did.” 

“Well, yeah, but he's still a fucking criminal.” Taerae says exasperated. “What is going on with you? How are you trying to convince me this is normal?” 

“I know it's not normal, it's an extraordinary circumstance.” Matthew exhales. “Jiwoong is not like anyone else I've met before.” 

“Oh my God, you're in love with him?!” Taerae rubs his face, horrified. 

“What? No.” Matthew shakes his head. “I mean, I really like him, but it's not love. I know we don't have a future together.” 

“Why are your eyes sparkly then?” Taerae says, sounding terrified. 

“They're not.” Matthew scowls. “I just want to enjoy this while I can. I know he'll have to leave soon.” 

“Why? Is he on the run or something?” Taerae stares at him with dead eyes, and Matthew bites his lips. “Oh, fuck. That's why he's hiding in your house.” 

“Yeah, but even if he wasn't, we're not meant to be.” Matthew says. 

“Oh, really?” 

“He doesn't want to stop committing crimes, and he doesn't want my help with it either. So.” Matthew shrugs. 

“You offered to help? And you have the guts to tell me you're not in love?” Taerae scoffs. “Jesus Christ.”

“It's not love. We've only known each other for a few months.” 

“What I hear is that he said he's not going to be your boyfriend, so now you're trying to convince yourself you're not completely in love with him?” Taerae looks him dead in the eyes. 

“Basically, yeah.” Matthew sighs. 

“Matthew, I say this as your friend, because I care about you, but this is seriously fucked up.” Taerae says, stern. “What the hell are you thinking? This isn’t a drama, these people can be dangerous.” 

“I know. This wasn't something I planned, it just happened.” Matthew closes his eyes for a second and tries not to let his frustration win. He needs to be calm if he wants to convince Taerae. “Jiwoong ran to me because he was desperate, and I felt like I owed him.” 

“I can excuse hiding him for a night or two, but has it been what? A month now?” Taerae shakes his head. “I'm betting you're not even telling me everything you've done.” 

“Jiwoong doesn't want me to get involved with his stuff. He's not the person you're thinking of.” 

“He's not a criminal who's taking advantage of your house and resources?” Taerae raises an eyebrow, and all the judgement sort of sours things for Matthew. 

“No. I don't worry about him doing anything to me. I actually feel safe and appreciated when I'm with him.” 

They hold each other's gazes for a moment, until Taerae sighs and looks away. 

“Look, I know it's insane. I agree.” Matthew says with a softer voice. “But I'm not being coerced into it or having a breakdown, I'm doing it because I want to.” 

“I can't even-”

“It'll be over soon anyway. Don't worry.” Matthew sighs. 

“I can't believe you're sulking over someone who's not even willing to be your boyfriend.” Taerae frowns. “It sounds like he's the only one winning.” 

“He's not.” Matthew tries to tone down the involuntary smile. “He’s like the lead in a romcom. He makes a mess, but one you didn't know you needed.” 

“And you have the audacity to say you're not in love, right. Saying sappy stuff like that.” Taerae scoffs. 

“I'm not.” Matthew rolls his eyes. 

“Ok, if you want me to accept this reality, I'll have to hear all the details. Everything from beginning to end.” Taerae exhales. 

“Fine, but that'll take a while.” Matthew takes a deep breath and starts from the beginning. 

They talk for about an hour, eating dinner while Matthew tells him everything. It works as venting too, as he feels a lot lighter after he's done. Taerae doesn't look any happier about it, but a little less angry maybe. 

They walk home together, even though it's pretty far from where they're at. Taerae keeps asking questions, and Matthew tries to be as honest as possible with him. There's a few things he doesn't mention, like the money. 

“Matthew, are you sure about this? If he's involved with weird people, the longer you stay the more likely things will blow up your way.” Taerae eyes him. 

“I know.” Matthew sighs. “It's just that… It's the first time I feel seen.” 

“Just because he cooks for you?” 

“There's that, but also everything else.” Matthew bites his lips. “His life is the complete opposite of mine. He doesn't follow the expectations, and he's still… living. It's like I never thought of that before, of just doing things I want. I guess I always thought my sexuality was already trouble enough, why take risks?” 

“Now you want to commit crimes?” 

“I'm not saying what he does is ok, I'm saying I'd like to have the courage he has to do it.” Matthew rolls his eyes. 

“I'm worried about you.” Taerae exhales, eyeing him.

“I know, but I promise I'm not doing anything too crazy.” Matthew smiles at him. “You're a good friend. I'd be suspicious if you went along with it too quickly.” 

“Dumb ass.” Taerae glares at him. “I'm sleeping over at your place tonight, I should have a talk with that guy.” 

“No, please.” Matthew grimaces. “I don't want to deal with any of that today… Just come over on the weekend, we'll have more time too.” 

“Fine, but I'm not happy about this.” Taerae huffs. 

“Thank you.” Matthew nudges him. 

They split up not long after, and Matthew walks alone for a few more minutes. He sent a text to Jiwoong's phone earlier when he was leaving the restaurant, and he now checks that the reply was a kissy emoji.

Even with an old flip phone, Jiwoong texts him back in minutes every time, although they don't do that often. As he walks, staring at his phone, dumb smile and all that, a sudden rain starts to pour. 

It comes out of nowhere, and in thirty seconds he's under a full on storm, drenched and walking as fast as possible. Maybe if the downpour hadn't started, he would've heard the car door opening behind him, but he didn't. 

A pair of arms comes out of nowhere to grab him, pulling his chest. As he screams and struggles, a piece of cloth covers his mouth, a strong and foul smell of chemicals taking over his senses. Matthew panics, trying to throw punches and shake off the stranger confining him. It doesn't work, whoever is holding him is much stronger. 

When he breathes in, his vision gets blurry, and his body numbs as he's dragged away. As he loses consciousness, Matthew's last thought is that he's probably getting a cold from this. 

Something prickles his face, but he can't immediately open his eyes. Different voices morph into gibberish, and his head hurts when he tries to make the effort to wake up. 

It's like a fever dream, but much worse. He can feel his whole body, but it's like his head is creating giant illusions that crush his consciousness every time he's close to reclaiming it. 

It feels like hours have passed when he's violently woken up with water being thrown on his face. Matthew gasps for air, vision blurry as the water hurts his eyes, and the silhouette of multiple men is panic inducing. 

There's a circle around him, he's on the mud ground, a grass field. A car's headlight blinds him further, pointed straight at his face. He counts five at a first look. His hands are tied behind his back, and so are his feet apparently.

“Wake up, pretty boy. We have business to discuss.” A familiar voice chuckles. Matthew looks up to find the shiny head guy staring down at him with a wicked smile. 

“Hell no.” Matthew closes his eyes, sighing. “I can't fucking believe this. This is my punishment for saying those things to Taerae.”

“A bit too early to be making your prayers, no?” The guy takes a step closer. 

“What do you want?” Matthew gives him an unamused look as he sits up. The bald man crouches in front of him, smirking. 

“You know what I want. The money.” He reaches a hand and holds his chin. “You're the one who took it, and you're going to take me to it.” 

“I have to idea what you're talking about.” Matthew coughs. 

“Oh, but you do.” He grins. “We had to gut a close friend of ours to get that information.” 

“Sorry to tell you that was for nothing. I don't know anything about that, unless you're talking about my savings, which aren't much honestly.” 

Matthew holds his stare, and maybe he was too brave, because the next thing he knows he's falling on his back after getting a hard slap across his face. It stings, eyes and nose burning, and he can only roll on the ground and wince in pain in response. 

“I'm not playing nice. Everytime I ask and you don't give me an answer, I'll hit you.” He steps on Matthew's chest, crushing him without any mercy. Matthew can barely hold back a scream, grunting pathetically on the ground as his lungs get pressed. “Where is it?” 

“I don't know-” Matthew screams as he presses down his weight. 

“Tell me where he hid it.” He moves his feet to his neck, and as the heavy boots constric his breathing, Matthew is scared of death for the first time. 

It's terrifying, his body fights desperately for air. However, he can't just say it. Not because he would give his life for Jiwoong's money, but because he doesn't know if that will save him. If he tells the truth, will he be spared? So far, he's not compelled to believe that. 

Does he even have an option though? As air barely gets to his lungs, Matthew isn't sure.

The pressure suddenly vanishes, and he gasps desperately for air, coughing and almost choking. Matthew recoils on himself, trying to protect his guts. 

“Tell me.” 

“I don't know.” Matthew groans, not looking his way as he still catches his breath. 

“You little piece of shit. I can drag this on for how long as I want to.” He scoffs. 

“Hey, I don't think we need to.” Someone else says, bringing the guy's attention to him. “Check this out. He was texting Black Cat.” 

The guy walks over, and Matthew gulps, powerless to do anything to stop him. A smirk slowly comes to his face as he looks at the screen, and Matthew knows things will only get worse from there on. 

“So, our little thief is in love with a man?” He cackles. “Who would've thought I'd be happy to meet a freak?” 

“Should we call him?” The other chuckles. 

“Absolutely.” The guy locks eyes with him. 

Although he's worried about Jiwoong's safety, he's also relieved. The chances of him getting out alive are so much higher with at least one person knowing about his disappearance. So far, he wasn't likely to make it. 

The man gather around his phone after stuffing his mouth with a piece of cloth. It rings once and Jiwoong picks it up with an anxious tone. 

“Where are you? Did you get stuck somewhere because of the rain?” Jiwoong sounds terribly worried. 

“He definitely got stuck somewhere, but not because of the rain.” He says, eyes on Matthew. 

A few seconds of silence follow on the other end before Jiwoong replies, and this time his voice is straight up scary. 

“If you touch a fucking hair on his head, I'm fucking killing you.” 

“Oh, I'm sure you'd like that.” He chuckles. “I know you're capable of it.” 

“Where? Take me and let him go.” 

“Not so fast. I know you're not dumb.” He clicks his tongue. “You'll come to the place I'll text you, then I'll have some of my guys pick you up. If you call anyone, I'll kill him.” 

“I'm on my way. Do not touch him.” 

“Yeah, we'll see about that.” He hums and hangs up. “Well, that will be fun. Do you know what your boyfriend is known for? I bet you don't.” 

The guy walks over to him again, pulling the cloth out of his mouth. Matthew doesn't answer, he simply stares back at the sinister eyes watching him. Honestly, he's fucking scared, but he's also angry. This guy is ruining the one good thing he had going on, just for money. 

“Don't you want to know?” He tilts his head. 

“Fuck off.” Matthew grits his teeth. 

“Oh, you should listen to me. You wouldn't want to share a bed with a murder, would you?” He chuckles. The words make him freeze, but he keeps his face blank. “I'm not lying. He killed at least two people that I know of.” 

“I heard the last guy that tried to rob him is still in a coma.” Another guy says, sounding amused. 

“See? He's not merciful at all, so don't hold it against me for being a little too violent.” He sighs. “Well, I guess his victims weren't exactly innocent, but still, a lunatic with a knife.” 

“Shut the fuck up.” Matthew spats, head spinning. 

“Don’t look at me with all that rage, I’m exactly the same as your dear boyfriend.” He kicks his side, a strong hit that pushes air out of his lungs, making Matthew wince in pain again. 

He almosts lashes out, because how dare this bald fuck compare himself to Jiwoong? But he's aware that would only get him another kick, and he's honestly had enough, his body hurts all over already.

“We'll give him an hour, if he plays any tricks…” The guy crouches next to him again and pulls out a knife from his pocket, he presses it against his throat, grinning like a maniac. “I'll cut your throat.” 

“You should be telling him that. I'm already tied down.” Matthew gulps. 

“True.” He laughs, pulling the knife away. “Well, since we have to wait, what about some entertainment?” 

“Oh, should I turn on the music?” A guy claps. 

“Definitely, something sexy.” The bald man chuckles, eyes on him. As some eighties song starts playing, he gets up and nudges him with his foot. “Dance for us.” 

“Fuck you.” Matthew glares at him, preparing his stomach for the next blow. Except it doesn't come, the man just stares down at him with his smirk and pulls out his phone. 

“Dance or I'll start taking pictures.” He pauses, mockingly considering him. “Oh, maybe you'd like that better? I heard you're into that.” 

“Take them. I’ll kill you myself.” Matthew says, voice flat.  

At this point, rage boils him inside. It's too much. Jiwoong may have had this coming his way, but Matthew certainly doesn't deserve any of this.  

None of that matters though, whatever he may be feeling, he still has to swallow it and take the next few kicks in silence. His ribs are probably broken by now, it hurts like hell and any slight movement feels like being perforated on his side. 

They stop hitting him, or engaging with him whatsoever, once he loses consciousness. It happens a few times, he's in and out every other minute, and can only roll his head, either looking at the sky or the blinding headlights. 

It hurts his neck to look up, and his body feels like it was lit on fire, so he eventually just closes his eyes and begs to pass out again. The pain doesn't let him completely dissociate, bringing him to the reality of euphoric voices. 

It feels like hours have passed when he hears a car, and the silence that finally follows gives away something's happening. Matthew forces his eyes open but he can't see much, the men are gathered up ahead, staring at something beyond his sight. 

“What did you do to him?! I told you not to fucking touch him!” He never heard Jiwoong being so aggressive. 

“Just a little welcoming, calm down. He's still breathing, isn't he?” The bald guy chuckles. “Well, now we've got you here. You're taking us to your safehouse.” 

“I'm not doing shit until you take him to a hospital.” Jiwoong says, and it sounds like he's super close, but Matthew can't see him thanks to the fucking lights on his eyes. 

“We both know that's not happening. He's coming with us, to make sure you don't try anything.” 

“Let him go. He has nothing to do with this.” 

“You made him part of it, too late.” 

“Then just go ahead and kill both of us, but you'll never get the money.” 

“Do you think I'll buy that?” 

“I think you don't know what I'm willing to do.” Jiwoong exhales. “I'm not leaving until I know he's safe. I'd rather die.” 

“For a dude you met last month and probably won't want anything to do with the real you?” He laughs. 

“Yes.” Jiwoong's voice is so confidently scary it sends shivers down his spine. 

“We're not taking him to a hospital.” The guy says angered. 

“Call an ambulance. I'll leave once it's coming.” 

“Are you fucking kidding me? I don't think you understand what's happening.” 

“You're the one who doesn't understand.” Jiwoong spats, and Matthew really wishes he could see his face. “If anything happens to him, one of us is dying.” 

“Motherfucker.” He scoffs. “Fine. We'll do as you want, but we'll do it inside the fucking car. If you try to trick us, I'll gut you and come back for him.” 

“Let me see him.” 

“Fucking smartass.” He mumbles.

Then he hears footsteps, and Matthew sees his boots coming near as he steps in front of the headlights. A quiet gasp, he walks over in a rush, and Matthew can finally see his face. He looks desperate, pale, it's not a good look on him, but he still manages to be beautiful. 

“These fucking rats, what have they done to you?” Jiwoong crouches next to him, eyes terribly sad. “I'm sorry. This is all my fault.” 

“It's not…” Matthew chokes out, coughing a bit. It hurts to speak, his chest moves a bit too much when he does. 

“It is, so trust me, I'll fix it.” Jiwoong whispers, reaching out a hand to rub his cheeks. He smiles then, and it's the kind of smile that makes Matthew want to retribute, so he does, even if his face hurts. 

In that moment, he knows he's not dying. He might be fucked up, but if Jiwoong says he'll fix it, Matthew trusts him with it. Unreasonably so.

“Enough. Let's go.” The man says, staring down at them. 

“Not yet.” Jiwoong says, eyes dead as he turns to face him. 

“What the fuck? Are you trying to play something on us? Do you think I'm stupid?” The bald guy spats, reaching out for his knife again. 

Jiwoong stands up, partially covering Matthew's sight as he positions himself between them. 

“C'mon.” Jiwoong says, hands balling into fists. 

Then, it's chaos. The bald guy comes at him first, knife going straight for his chest, but Jiwoong catches his arm with both hands and in swift move pulls him in, headbutting him with the impulse. The bald man falls on his back, blood flowing down his nose as he shouts all sorts of profanities. 

“Fucking hold him! What the fuck are you waiting?!” He shouts out his orders, and the minions move as if they were frozen up to that point. 

Two of them flank Jiwoong, and he meets the first one with a punch to the face, which works, but unfortunately leaves his back open for the other guy. Jiwoong is stuck in a headlock, trying to punch his way out of it but losing strength quickly. 

The bald man stands back up, coming forward with the knife in hand and blood in his eyes. Matthew uselessly tries to move, like he could break out, but he doesn't have the strength to even turn his body. 

As Jiwoong struggles to break free, the knife hits the side of his leg, and a scream comes out, horrid and desperate. The man laughs, his hysteric tune contrasting Jiwoong's cries. 

In the split second he thinks he has won, the guy makes the terrible mistake of leaving the knife in Jiwoong's body. To everyone's surprise, Jiwoong is the one to pull it out. 

Before the big guy headlocking Jiwoong has a chance to back away, he's perforated on his side, losing his grip immediately. Jiwoong, not repeating his opponent’s mistake, takes the knife with him. Blood splatters all over, and Matthew's flinches as the warm fluid sprinkles his face. 

“You're done.” Jiwoong spits on the floor, pointing the knife forward. 

“You're still outnumbered, you stupid fucker.” Although he says that, the man keeps his distance and watches for Jiwoong's moves. 

“Am I?” Jiwoong chuckles, and then they hear it. 

Sirens. They all panic while Jiwoong laughs. 

“You’re willing to go to jail for this random?!” The bald guy shouts at him. “I'll tell them everything! You're going to spend your life in prison!” 

“Yeah, I don't give a shit. As long as you're with me.” Jiwoong rolls his shoulders back. 

“Fuck! Let's get out of here!” One of the men says, and they all start running like chickens back to the car. 

When the bald guy makes a run for it, Jiwoong runs after him, tackling him down. He punches him repeatedly, taking a few blows himself, and the knife stays clutched on his hand. 

Soon, the headlights stop blinding him and red and blue color his vision. He tries to move forward, to tell Jiwoong to run, but his voice won't come out. 

Once he manages to drag himself forward a few inches, all his strength leaves him and he blacks out. The last thing he sees is Jiwoong still on top of that man, punching him with fists covered in blood. 

-

The quiet weeping and a distant beep anchor him to reality. It takes some timel for him to fully grasp the sound. Matthew hears his mom's soft voice, and he grabs onto it, following it back to consciousness. 

He tries to speak, eyes focusing on the figure hunched over him. Sound doesn't come out, no matter how hard he tries, so he looks around and meets his dad's eyes. Matthew had never seen his dad cry, and he'd rather it'd stayed that way.

Next time he wakes up, his parents are sitting by the bed. His vision is much clearer, and although his body feels heavier than ever, he can actually move. Matthew tries to sit up to call for them, but as soon as he does the pain on his side makes him wince. 

They both look startled and sit up to stand over him. 

“Matthew? Are you awake? Can you hear me?” Her worried eyes fill with tears as she looks at him.  

“Mom…” Matthew gulps, throat dry. He eyes his dad, who's wiping his tears. “Sorry I let you worry.”

“No, no. Thank you for waking up.” His mom hugs him, sobbing on his shoulder. “I thought we'd lose you. Thank you so much for surviving, my baby.” 

Matthew dissociates for a while. His parents cry and ask the doctors all possible questions, but he keeps wondering when he will have a chance to ask. 

He ends up sleeping again, and he wakes up to an empty room this time. It's a little comforting to be honest, since he gets some time to sit with his thoughts. 

The last thing he remembers… Jiwoong looked out of it. Is he ok? Was he caught? Who'd be able to tell him? Certainly not his parents. If they knew what actually happened, they would've said something by now. 

Thankfully, the person that comes through the door in the next minute is Taerae. His best friend gasps as he sees him awake, and Matthew smiles at him. 

“Hey.” 

“Matthew…” Taerae sighs, relieved, walking closer with a frown. “You idiot. After you're recovered, I'll beat you up myself.” 

“What did I do?” Matthew giggles, but not too hard since it still hurts. 

“Asshole. Do you know how worried I was? And your parents? I was the one that had to call them, you know.” Taerae huffs, but his eyes are getting moist. “You almost died, Matthew.” 

“I know.” Matthew gulps, eyeing him. “Can you get me some water, please?” 

“Yeah, of course.” Taerae quickly drops his bag on the chair and gets him the bottle next to the bed. Matthew sips on it through a straw, feeling a lot better. 

“Thanks.” He licks his lips, still not having enough strength to fully move his arms. “Can you tell me everything that happened? I blacked out before the police got there.” 

“Aren't you giving me a minute to ask you how you're feeling?” Taerae tilts his head and Matthew only smiles. “Idiot.” He sighs, sitting down. 

“I couldn't ask my parents.” 

“They don't know anything.” Taerae takes a deep breath. “Jiwoong told the cops you didn't know anything, you're the only one that came out of there without being arrested.” 

“Is he ok? Was he hurt?” 

“I heard he had some injuries, but nothing too serious.” Taerae looks away. “He called me.”

“What?” 

“Before he went out to get you, he called me and asked me to follow him from the station.” Taerae purses his lips. “He was planning on getting arrested to save you. So, don't tell the police anything once they come to question you. It'll cause him more problems.” 

“Oh.” Matthew nods. “Is he… locked up too?” 

“Yes.” Taerae meets his eyes, and his expression turns stern. “Stop here, Matthew.” 

“I know.” Matthew avoids his eyes. “I just… I had things to say.” 

“You can't always get closure.” Taerae sighs. “Let it go.”

“Yeah, I know.” 

-

When he goes home for the first time after everything, it's all wrong. The smell, the space, the silence. It takes him a moment to ground himself, memories flashing. 

Before his parents get worried, he locks himself in his room saying he needs to nap. Only when he's sitting in his bed, he spots the envelope on top of the desk. Matthew gets up, heart racing, and steps closer. 

The envelope is big, dusty, like it's been there for a while. From the shape and volume, he can already tell what's inside. Matthew takes it and turns it around, on the front of it, written in an almost unintelligible calligraphy, is the word ‘rent’. He scoffs as he opens it and sees enough money to pay for the actual rent for months. 

“You idiot.” Matthew bites his lips, trying to hold back the stupid tears. 

As he takes it out, a different piece of paper falls from the envelope. It's a note, and once he reads it, he actually cries. 

Sorry for the mess. Have a good life.

“Did you think that's enough? Asshole.” Matthew wipes his tears, trying to keep his voice down. “Did you have nothing else to say? Have a good life? Stupid ass cliche line.” 

It's like getting slapped. He has so much to say, so much to ask about, but Jiwoong leaves him money and a goodbye note? Is he the only one that doesn't know how to move on? 

The apartment feels empty, even though his parents are still there to take care of him. Matthew keeps looking at the corner by the window every now and then, and the space is all he can feel. 

After some time, even he thinks it's getting pathetic. His parents get worried because ‘he hasn't been himself’ and although Taerae doesn't say anything, he's been coming over way more often.

So, he gets his shit together. Matthew stops moping, he stops thinking about him, and he starts looking for another job. It's even harder than before, and it takes some time, but his parents finally go back home after he proves to them he's fine. 

Of course, he's not fine at all, but as long as he can pretend he is, things are manageable. 

After a month or so since that day, Matthew starts having dreams. Sometimes it's nightmares, when they're about that night, but mostly it's mundane dreams. One time, he met Jiwoong in the cereal aisle of a grocery shop, and they argued over their favourite flavours.

It makes him believe Taerae, he's gone genuinely insane. Instead of listening to his best friend however, he decides to try and get some closure after all. 

The detention facility isn't as large as he thought. It'd look like an ordinary building, if not for the unusually tall walls and fences. All the way down to the visiting area, Matthew feels like his heart is about to jump out of his chest. 

One may think he's scared to be in a prison, but he's actually anxious to meet Jiwoong. The guard at the front said there's a possibility Jiwoong won't come out to see him, apparently he hasn't taken visitors. If Jiwoong doesn't want to see him, what then? 

It'd probably hurt more than having his ribs broken. He's been aching to see his face, to talk to him, and it'd be gut wrenching if that feeling isn't reciprocal. 

As he sits in front of a glass window, Matthew wipes the sweat from his palms on his thighs. He tries counting his breathing to avoid spiraling into intrusive thoughts, and it works for a while. All his attention is on the door on the other side, and when it opens, he stops breathing. 

Jiwoong stands on the other side, and his face says nothing, there's no emotion whatsoever. He walks in and sits in front of Matthew, eyes not leaving his. They reach for the phone without breaking eye contact.

“What are you doing here?” 

“I couldn't sleep.” Matthew sighs. “You know, it's rude to just leave. You could've at least made that fancy dinner you promised.” 

“Sorry.” Jiwoong looks down, mask slipping as his voice gets sorrowful. “Sorry for everything.” 

“I need you to answer me something. Honestly.” Matthew pauses, gathering his courage, and continues as he locks eyes with Jiwoong. “That guy, he said you killed people before… Was he telling the truth?” 

“No.” Jiwoong doesn't hesitate, neither does he look fazed. 

“Ok.” Matthew sags in relief. 

“I did almost kill a guy once, which is where the rumours come from, but he did survive.” Jiwoong purses his lips. “And it was sort of self defence, so.” 

“Well, fuck.” Matthew exhales. 

“Why? Does it change something?” 

“Yeah, it'd be worse to be in love with a killer.” Matthew holds his gaze, trying really hard to keep his eyes dried up. 

“Don’t say stuff like that.” Jiwoong looks away first. 

“I’m sorry I wasn't strong enough, or careful enough.” Matthew wipes a tear before it can fall. “If I had-” 

“Ya! Did you hit your head?” Jiwoong scoffs. “I'm here because I committed a crime. I'm paying for my actions. This is all my fault.” 

“It wasn't all your fault.” Matthew sulks.

“Yes, it was.” Jiwoong shakes his head. “I'm sorry I ever brought you into this.” 

“Well, I'm not.” Matthew scowls, frustration rising up, and Jiwoong looks up at him with confusion. “I'm sorry about how things ended, but I don't regret anything.” 

“Matthew, I-” 

“I don't regret letting you in, or helping you. I don't regret a single second we spent together, they were all fucking great.” Matthew rants, and along with it comes the tears he'd been holding. “If I had the chance, I'd do it again. If I had the chance, I'd…” 

He closes his eyes, not handling the way Jiwoong looks at him. It's not a happy or hopeful look, but the opposite, it's soul crushing. Matthew breathes in and out a couple times, wiping his tears again. 

“Why won't you just ask me to wait?” Matthew begs him, voice shaky. “I'd wait for you.” 

“Don't wait. I don't want you to do that.” Jiwoong smiles, but it's not a happy one. “Live a good life, I'll try to do that too.” 

“What if I want to wait? What then? You can't stop me.” 

“It was great meeting you, Matthew.” Jiwoong looks at him, and he knows it's the last time because it lingers for way too long. 

Just like that, without waiting for a reply, Jiwoong leaves him. It doesn't give him closure, even though by all means it should. There's nothing left to say, but when he leaves that sad looking building, all he wants is to run back inside. 

Matthew cries all the way back home, like he hasn't allowed himself to do in a long time. It's fine if he cries it out, it's good even. Once he lets it all out, and he's empty and dry, he'll move on. 

-

5 YEARS LATER 

-

Snow flies on his wake as he speeds down the mountain, the muffled complaints of his best friend coming from his back. Matthew doesn't mind him, and keeps going at his usual speed until they get to the end of the track.

Instead of stopping his board, Taerae slows down only a bit before hitting him straight on. They both tumble down and roll on the snow like two idiots, and the impact hurts his stomach, but he can't stop laughing as Taerae curses him off for letting him come down alone. 

“This is attempted murder. I told you I wasn't confident with the board!” Taerae hits his arm before dropping on the ground next to him. 

“You made it fine.” Matthew chuckles. “You’re good.” 

“Is this what you do all day? Try to murder the guests?” 

“No, some days I'm in the spa. That one's my favourite.” Matthew smirks. 

“Oh, how is that going?” 

“Nice.” Matthew shrugs, smiling. “He gave me flowers last week.” 

“What does he do again?” 

“He’s a massage therapist.” Matthew eyes him. “He's pretty good at his job.” 

“Oh my God, you're annoying.” Taerae chuckles and throws snow at him. “Are you introducing him to your parents?” 

“No.” Matthew grimaces, and upon Taerae’s judgy look, sighs. “I mean, he's nice and I like him, but we're not there yet.” 

“Uh, right.” Taerae clears his throat. “Your parents are coming tomorrow?” 

“Yeah, I'll head back to Seoul in the morning.” Matthew sits up and stretches. “I have to clean up the apartment for them.” 

“Why don't you come back with me tonight?” 

“Well, I have a date.” Matthew giggles. 

“Obviously.” Taerae snorts, sitting up as well. “Haven't you been dating for like a month? Why don't you want to make it official?” 

“I don't know, too soon.” Matthew purses his lips. “I mean, he's really cool, I like him, and he treats me well… It's just…” 

“Just what?” Taerae raises a brow. 

“I think he likes me more than I like him.” Matthew shrugs. 

“Did you allow yourself to actually try?” Taerae eyes him, skeptical. “Give him a real chance.” 

“I want to.” Matthew sulks. “I just don't see myself running after some guy. It feels wrong to have to put in effort into liking someone.” 

“When you say it like that.” Taerae huffs. “I bet I know a guy you'd be running after.” 

“I would not.” Matthew rolls his eyes. “I'm over that.” 

“Yeah, sure. He has nothing to do with why your relationships tend to last three months at most.” Taerae scoffs, standing up and patting the snow off him. 

“Why do you keep bringing him up? It's been years.” Matthew gets up too, annoyed. 

“It's been years and you haven't properly dealt with it.” Taerae eyes him. “Every single time you're getting close to someone, you say the same thing. ‘There’s something missing’, or ‘I don't like them as much’.”

“Well, because it's true!” Matthew huffs. “Should I just settle for anything? When I know I could have more?” 

“The problem is that you don't want ‘more’, you want someone specific.” Taerae shakes his head. 

“I don't.” Matthew glares at him. 

“Fine, you don't.” Taerae tongues his cheek. “Let’s get something to eat, I'm starving.” 

Although Taerae knows him well, he's wrong about this. He may have raised his standards after him, but that was a good thing, he hasn't dealt with that many trashy men thanks to it. It's definitely not like Matthew still has feelings for him. 

If he were to see him again, it'd be great, sure. It's just not something he thinks he’d go after. Taerae is wrong, because he wouldn't run to him if he had the chance now. Their relationship was a beautiful story, but it's over. 

-

“Isn't it lonely to stay up there? You should work closer to your friends, or your family.” Mom shakes her head as she waits for him to unlock the door. 

“It's not lonely. The staff is really friendly, everyone is nice to me. I like working there.” Matthew smiles at her, opening the door and gesturing for them to go in first. 

“If you like it, that's good. Just take care out there. I heard they make the assistants overwork in places like that.” His dad says as he walks inside. 

“I'm not working half as much as I was in office jobs.” Matthew snorts, taking off his shoes. “Don't get me wrong, it's tough work, but they actually let us rest.” 

“Matthew! How long was that window left open for? You should be more careful!” His mom clicks her tongue, pointing at the window left open. 

The window at the corner of the room, wide open. 

“Uh, how did I miss that?” Matthew frowns, walking over to the window. 

The floor doesn't have any dirt on it, which would be expected if he left the window open for over a month. There's nothing though, the window is just dusty, but so are all the others. 

When he turns back, he freezes. The ashtray is on top of the shelf next to the window. The ashtray he kept inside the cabinet and never used once. 

“Matthew-ya, what's wrong?” His mom eyes him. 

“Nothing.” Matthew clears his throat. “I'll go clean up the room for you.” 

“Are you sure you don't want us to go to a hotel? You haven't been home for a while.” 

“It's fine. I was thinking I could sleep over at Taerae's house or something. We haven't hung out much.” 

“That's nice too. You should bring him tomorrow to have lunch with us.” 

“Sure, I'll ask him.” Matthew nods, walking to the bedroom. 

Matthew stops as he steps inside, because although his mind is telling him this is insanity, and he stopped entertaining insanity a long time ago, it's hard to crush the spark. The ‘what if’ has already set at the back of his mind, and it keeps growing and consuming every single corner of it in exponential speed. 

His heart starts racing, and he knows it's already been decided. 

“Mom, dad. Sorry, can I catch up with you guys tomorrow?” He goes back to the living room, a bit euphoric. “I have to do something really important.” 

“What happened? Is something wrong?” His dad widens his eyes. 

“No. Everything is good. It's just something I have to check, then I'll just head to Taerae's house. Don't worry.” 

Matthew gives his mom and dad a hug before leaving. They look at him with worried eyes, but the rush he's feeling cannot be stopped. 

As he gets in the car, he texts Taerae and asks him to lie if his parents call. That's obviously met with multiple questions from his best friend, but Matthew just promises to explain later. 

He drives nonstop, even though his stomach starts rumbling halfway. His mind seems to be going faster than the car, as he prepares to be met with all possible realities. And a single impossible one. 

The trail up the mountain isn't as well kept as he remembers it, overgrown branches and all, but he's able to spot the entrance right away. Once he parks the car in front of the cottage, he doubts himself. 

There's no light turned on inside. It's already late afternoon, and as the clouds are thick, the sunlight is minimal. He steps out of the car feeling scared after a long time, and he walks to the front door with shaky steps. 

The door is locked. Matthew takes a deep breath, it was expected. He walks over to the deck, peeking inside through the window, there's no sign of use. Disappointment fills him.

“I guess I'm not over it.” Matthew sighs, frustrated. 

He swipes the snow and takes a seat on the bench outside. Even without a pretty sunset, the lookout to the valley is still beautiful. As he looks up to the sky, he wishes the clouds would open up for a few hours, so he could at least stargaze before going home. 

“Are you waiting for someone?” 

The voice makes him snap his head down, towards the familiar figure standing at the bottom of the staircase to the porch. Matthew jumps up, and Jiwoong laughs at his reaction. 

“What? Did you come here to find someone else?” Jiwoong chuckles. 

“You broke into my apartment.” Matthew gapes at him. Warmth floods him from the inside, just at the sight of him. 

“I didn't. You just never changed your codeword.” Jiwoong shrugs. 

“I can not believe you.” Matthew scoffs. “You left the window open.” 

“Did you come all the way here to scold me?” Jiwoong grins up at him. 

“Yeah.” Matthew bites his lips. 

“I didn't think you'd show up.” Jiwoong walks up the stairs, coming to stand right in front of him. “I told you not to wait.” 

“I wasn't waiting.” Matthew gulps. 

“You weren't waiting, but you got here so fast?” Jiwoong giggles. 

“It happened to be an opportune time for a drive.” Matthew huffs. 

“Right.” Jiwoong purses his lips. 

“I don't think your glass roof is that well protected, sir. You're the one who came running to my house.” Matthew clicks his tongue. “When did you even get out?” 

“Two days ago. I needed a place to crash.” Jiwoong smirks. “You're right. I shouldn't be judging.” 

Whatever he thought to say to come on top is swallowed up when his stomach rumbles loudly. Matthew looks up at him as he feels his face heating up. 

“Did you, perhaps in your hurry to drive somewhere, end up skipping lunch?” Jiwoong raises an eyebrow, terribly amused. 

“Yeah. Someone owes me a fancy dinner.” Matthew pouts. 

“Well, I don't know about fancy… but I have ramyun and meat.” Jiwoong offers him a hand. “Wanna have dinner with me?” 

“Are you asking me out on a date?” 

“Yes. I'm sorry, wasn't that clear in the way I'm basically drooling?” 

“Yeah, I should've known.” 

Matthew takes his hand, and it still feels so right. He stops before they get to the door, tugging him.

“What is it?” 

“I need to ask you something.” Matthew clears his throat.

“Ok. Go on.” Jiwoong tongues his cheek, amused. 

“This time… Can we make plans?” Matthew bites his lips, and Jiwoong visibly melts, body relaxing and a grin on his face. 

“Yeah, I'll love to make plans with you.” Jiwoong pulls him by the hand and gives him a peck. 

As usual, he trusts him.