Chapter Text
Today was like any other: listening to the dull hum of the broken fan, opening the windows to get the damp smell out of the house and checking all the rooms for anything misplaced. 007n7 wanted this day to be done already, he was tired of this routine.
It had been weeks and still no sign of c00lkidd coming back into their home, no stray pizza boxes, his shoes still missing from the mat. The police hadn't done much to help, saying that they couldn't find a sign of the boy despite 007n7 knowing he had to be somewhere. He felt betrayed but still self aware enough to know that the officers most likely didn't trust him due to a string of years old arrests.
The former hacker hadn't left the house in days, Noli occasionally stopping by with food and water so 007n7 wouldn't drop dead on them. Noli was a mere spectator to 007n7 wasting away, they tried to get the man out more often by offering his favourite desserts and promises of helping 007n7 repair his c00lgui but nothing worked.
They missed the hacker they knew, witty and sharp with a comeback always ready in his back pocket. The 007n7 that Noli had become friends with slowly melted away when he had adopted c00lkidd, once a fierce and fiery man in the face of law enforcement and even admins, was now a father with a criminal history and a soft heart.
007n7 paced back and forth along the length of his bedroom, trying to not trip on the water bottles scattered all across the floor. He hated how filthy he'd become, how sloppy he let himself get over the time his son was missing. Noli said it was “just the grief getting to him” but the father knew better than that, it had to be more than just grief.
A clammy hand carded through his hair, pushing stray strands out of his eyes. He should probably go get a haircut but he'd spent nearly everything he had on trying to find his precious son. Not even other exploiters could find a trace of c00lkidd. 007n7 sat back on the edge of his bed, hands muffling his soft cries and hiccups. Tears soaked his cheeks as he thought back to the day he found c00lkidd, swaddled up in a blanket and left on his doorstep. Oh how he wanted to go back to stop this from ever happening…
It had now been a month since C00lkidd had vanished and 007n7 was losing hope, not even Noli could salvage it. 007n7 stood up from his bed and shuffled over to the mirror. He looked like shit: hair reaching chin length and slicked back with grease, deep bags resting under his bloodshot eyes, thick and prickly stubble that he couldn't find the motivation to shave off and the same, old Thomas the Tank Engine shirt that c00lkidd always found funny.
He pulled the t-shirt off which only left his white undershirt, he needed to wash it because it smelled as bad as the rest of his house, damp and old. He thumped down the stairs, eyes stinging from not being able to sleep properly anymore, down to the basement. The basement reeked of mould, the small windows barely being enough to vent the aggressive scent that clung to 007n7’s skin to make him smell even worse. He didn’t care enough to shower anymore so the smell barely bothered him anymore, he chucked the graphic tee into his half broken washing machine with some other loose pieces of clothing that also needed to be washed.
He slumped against the wall and let himself slide down to the floor with his face buried in his palms. He couldn’t do this anymore, he couldn’t keep waiting for his son to come back to him even if it was in a body bag. 007n7 opened the c00lgui, the glitching screens appearing at his fingertips with a soft red glow and droning hum. The hacker squinted trying to get his eyes to focus on the screens but they were so glitchy and dim that his eyes stung even more and started to water. He kept trying to read the commands, skimming through them to find the one he wanted, but it was no use, his eyes were just being strained too hard to even begin reading the small, flashy text on the c00lgui.
007n7 let the c00lgui disappear from his fingertips, dropping his head between his knees and more tears soaking into his khaki jeans. He didn't even bother trying to muffle his sobs, gasping and desperate, he couldn't care less about what could happen if Noli came in to find 007n7 curled into his knees like a child.
It took hours for him to stop crying, to go completely numb again while laying on his back, watching the fuzz of his vision dance across the ceiling. He was back in bed but it barely felt like it anymore, it didn't carry the same warmth, the same comfort it had before. 007n7 rubbed a hand over his face before letting his head fall to the side, he clasped his hands in front of his stomach as he curled up slightly, staring at the framed photo of him and c00lkidd. His precious son, his sweet c00lkidd.
Noli knocked gently at the front door, silently hoping they'd hear something from behind it. Small, shuffling steps made their way to the door, unlocking it before one side of 007n7’s exhausted face peered out the crack before the door shut again then unlocked and opened wide for Noli to come inside. Last they'd been told, their friend's house was a mess, cluttered and smelling of damp, but it didn't look dirty. 007n7 was half way through deep cleaning the place as indicated by his scuffed knees and dirty hands.
The father took out one of his earbuds, letting it dangle from the wire as he smiled gently. It seemed.. off. Something was wrong with the man's face as Noli studied it while smiling back, 007n7’s smile didn't quite reach his eyes, his stare seemed hollow and lifeless. He'd lost his spark, his pride and joy, all in one foul swoop.
He got straight back to fixing the pipes under his kitchen sink, squeezing himself beneath the metal pipes and fishing the wrench he was using from his pocket to get back to what he was doing. Noli sat on the nearby counter, careful to not knock anything over and frighten 007n7. The pair quietly chatted as the former exploiter cleaned up his living space but he still avoided his bedroom like it was a hazard to life. He also barely touched c00lkidd’s room, only going in to dust everything off and keep it tidy, Noli’s eyes were full of pity and a primal sadness when they watched 007n7 quietly mourning the deep cutting loss without a single word or even hiccup.
Noli offered to help but they were quickly dismissed as 007n7 put his cleaning supplies nearly back into their storage closet. The father stood in front of the now fixed sink as he methodically washed the grease and dust from his hands before offering a cup of coffee to his old cohort. They talked more, 007n7 starting to loosen up slightly and returning to his old self: bright, witty and funny. His eyes crinkled when he smiled, laughing at silly moments from their college days.
Soon, Noli had to go home, needing to feed the dog they were minding. 007n7 was left with his thoughts again, both the good and the gnawing self-deprecation that had clawed at the back of his mind.
Darkness seemed to swallow the house back up, wringing out every drop of joy, peace and colour from every atom. 007n7 pulled the c00lgui back up, now fixed because of Noli's rambling about their troubleshooting ideas for the panel. He scrolled through the commands as he walked towards his bedroom, trying for the third time this month to find his desired admin command.
The door clicked closed behind him as he removed his burger looking hat and glasses, setting them down on the nightstand as if 007n7 was just going to bed instead of what was actually about to happen.
;give 007n7 gun
His hands shook as he typed the command, hesitant to press enter. 007n7 took a deep breath in then out, counting down from three in a hushed mumble. On one, he clicked enter and the pistol dropped into his lap, hammer jiggling slightly from the small impact.
A bead of sweat rolled down his forehead as 007n7 stared at the gun, gripping it firmly in sweaty, shaking hands. He took the magazine out to check for rounds, full and ready for a bullet to be chambered, the brass was polished and clean. The bullets glinted in the dim moonlight leaking through his mostly drawn curtains, shining in a way that both comforted 007n7 yet still set a deep sense of churning unease in his stomach.
The magazine was quickly clicked back into place as 007n7 turned the safety off with a flick of the switch. He let out a long sigh, examining the gun once more: an average looking Glock 19, chambered in .9mm, a standard issue weapon to anyone on the outside looking in at the man; anyone in their right mind.
The polymer felt cold against 007n7’s feverish skin as he pressed the muzzle against his chin, his index finger tapped the side of the gun as he dug around what was left of his sane mind for a reason not to go forward with his current idea. He pulled the gun away, tears threatening to spill from his eyes as he pulled back the slide to let a bullet chamber. The bullet made a small click as it settled into place, the sound uncomfortably resonating in 007n7’s jaw.
The former hacker brought the muzzle back to his head, pressing it into the soft meat under his chin and slightly putting pressure on the underside of his tongue. He closed his eyes and took a deep, shaky breath in. His hands shook like branches in a storm, index finger weakly squeezing the trigger.
The gun didn't go off, 007n7 took another breath, slightly steadier than the first. His hands still trembled severely but his fingers felt stronger, adrenaline flooding through his arteries. He couldn't feel anything, from his head to his hands and feet, his whole body was numb.
Another short click sounded out before a sharp, loud bang tore through the still silence of the house. The only other sounds that followed were the quiet clink of the discarded round casing and a dull thump of something heavy hitting the floor.