Chapter Text
⚡🦇⚡
ding
Wally West yawned as he heard the notification from his phone, setting down the pen he’d been using to file yet another lab report, and shifting to tug out his phone from his jeans pocket. He was due for a break anyway, and what better way to spend the time than to swipe on attractive faces and read what his most recent match had to say?
you have one new message from match JohnDoe297 !
Wally raised an eyebrow at the username of his match, mentally noting it as a red flag because, well, who refers to them as a John Doe unless they’re secretly a murderer? That said, he must have swiped right for some reason.. oh, that’s why.
Wally found himself grinning at the photo of the quite handsome black dog on the very first picture on Jon Doe’s profile. Definitely some kind of Great Dane mix, and definitely the right way to work Findr ,
JohnDoe297: 😊
Right, an emoji. Well, better than yet another picture of a dick, Wally supposed, typing out a response to the other.
RednoseReindeer: Cute dog! What’s his name?
Wally set his phone back down and stretched, glancing at the clock on the wall across the room. His shift was almost over, which gave him about 3 hours to grab groceries and run through Central to do a quick patrol before heading to the Watchtower for monitor duty with Shayera. Which technically still left him with a couple hours to spare.
“Find a boyfriend yet, Walls?” chimed in a voice from over his shoulder, and Wally swiveled in his chair. He readjusted his attention to his co-worker, James, who had his legs folded up on his desk, and must have just woke up because Wally was pretty sure he was snoring not more than ten minutes ago.
“Man, I told you, I’m not looking like that,” Wally responded, ignoring the heat at the base of his neck. He really wasn’t looking for a boyfriend, or a girlfriend for that matter, or like, anyone – he was just bored, and after all – it was James who told him to download the damn application to begin with!
“Yeah, yeah, that’s what they all say,” James teased, dark brown eyes glittering playfully as he folded his hands behind his head, curly black hair as tousled as ever.
ding
“I’m serious, most of these guys are creeps, all they do is send dick pics on this app,” Wally supplied, trying not to sound nearly as sulky as he felt about the fact. “I tried to tell someone a joke and he told me that he only wanted me to knock knock on his bedroom door,” Wally added, wrinkling his nose a bit.
James let out a snort. Wally rolled his eyes, turning back to his desk and reaching for his phone.
“You’re doing this whole thing wrong, dude, trust me. That said – anyone send you something worth looking at?” Wally could hear the grin in James’ voice. He made a face.
“Shut up man, you’re gross,” Wally responded, looking at the new conversation he’d started with Mr. Murderer with the Dog.
JohnDoe297: his name is ace and hes an asshole
JohnDoe297: so you like dogs?
Wally eyed the message warily – fairly certain that no matter what he responded with, he could anticipate an incoming picture of another kind of dog. One from the sausage family.
“And you’re a catch man, I keep sayin’,” James said, and Wally rolled his eyes.
“Then why doesn’t anyone want to get to know me?” Wally threw back at the other, before typing out a quick response in the chat.
RednoseReindeer : I do! But my apartment doesn’t allow them ☹.
“They just wanna tap that freckled ass of yours man,” James responded, tactfully. Wally managed to keep the blush at bay, not wanting to entertain his friend.
“They don’t even know if it’s freckled,” Wally mumbled, pocketing his phone and getting to his feet.
James laughed at that, and Wally heard the other’s chair scraping against the floor as it was pushed back.
“You’re missing the point, Wally.” James said before walking over to the coffee station and Wally blew up at some of the red strands that had fallen into his face.
“Maybe, but I think these guys are too.”
ding
Wally took out his phone only to place it on silent and slip it back into his pocket. Despite the fact that it was the longest conversation Wally had managed before a picture of a penis was on the screen, Wally wasn’t sure anyone named John Doe was worth trusting.
⚡🦇⚡
Wally’s legs were up on the desk, his hands folded behind his head as he stared out the window absently. It was a quiet night, and Shayera was snoozing on the desk next to him. He looked over at her, admiring her soft red curls spread out over a couple reports.
It would probably be easier if he was into girls. He got along with them pretty well, and wasn’t too bad at flirting with them either – probably because of how easy and carefree it felt. How unserious. Girls were so pretty to look at, though. Their soft lips and kind eyes -
“Hn.” A deep grunt and Wally fumbled, simultaneously turning while his legs were still up on the desk, only to twist and almost fall off the chair – thankfully fast enough to catch himself.
“Bats! What’re you doing here?” Wally got to his feet, dusting off his suit and heard Shayera yawn and shift from behind him.
“Rounds before I head back.” Wally wondered if Batman got any ladies with that deadpan voice. Probably. Diana seemed to fawn over him sometimes. Well, fawn was probably not the right word, but Wally had to admit that there was a certain charm to the silent mysterious type.
Tall, dark, and handsome.
Batman continued to stand in the doorway, now eyeing the screen on the wall briefly, as though that’s not what Shayera and Wally were literally in that room at that moment for.
“Is it time to swap already?” Shayera asked, yawning again. “Or did something happen?”
“No.” Batman said, and Wally had to wonder if unsettling people or disarming people was a turn-on for the other man.
Speaking of turn-ons... Wally let his gaze rake over Batman’s build, the suit, and couldn’t help but wonder if there was anyone on Findr that matched it. Wally was struck by the idea of Batman on Findr and couldn’t help but let out what sounded awfully close to a giggle.
Batman looked at Wally, eyes narrowing a bit.
“Sorry, just had a funny thought,” Wally said, feeling his nose heat up and offering a sheepish green.
“Hn.” Batman turned around and left the doorway, out of sight, and Wally felt his shoulders sag a bit, before letting out another soft laugh. He moved to sit back down and kick his legs back up on the desk, shifting to dig his phone out from his suit.
“Of what?” Shayera perked up curiously, and Wally looked over at her blinking.
“Huh?”
“What was the funny thought?” She asked, raising an eyebrow and offering a half-smile as she moved to rest her head on her arm, stretched across the desk she was seated at.
Wally grinned, letting a beat pass and also ideally ensuring that Batman was much further away than he was before.
“Batman on Findr.”
Shayera burst out laughing.