Chapter Text
The thing about falling in love with someone is that sometimes it just happens.
To Donghyuck, there was no fireworks, no sparks nor butterflies.
The only thing that filled him was dread at realizing that he had fallen in love with someone he never should've in the first place.
Donghyuck was fourteen when he realize he liked Mark.
The realization of it only occurring when one of the seniors had made a passing joke about their friendship.
"People would think you're dating each other with how much you're stuck at the hips."
Mark had profusely and vehemently denied the statement, chasing down the person in retaliation while Donghyuck had laughed his ass off, although feeling a warmth rising up his cheeks at the thought of dating Mark.
The thing about loving Mark is that maybe he had always loved him.
The older had been with him ever since he could remember- childhood friends since diapers. And even though their personalities could never be more different, they worked well together.
His mother always used to tease him about it, constantly mentioning his apparent attachment to Mark ever since he was little, how he would make a huge fuss whenever he had to separate himself from the older.
And when his mother had sadly passed away from cancer and his aunt moved in with him, Mark had stood by his side the whole time, accompanying him throughout the funeral as his mother was laid to rest.
His attachment had grew stronger after that point in time. He remembered thinking how Mark was the only family he had left in the world.
He knew how much it bothered the other the fact that he was tailing him wherever he went since then, but Mark was always the nice person- refusing to push him away just after he lost his mother. And Donghyuck took advantage of that.
He once had the wonderful fantasy of confessing to the older, being young and naive as he was and unthinking of the repercussion of what might happened if he were to confess and get rejected.
But his plans never made it to light when Mark graduated and moved away to venture into the big world.
It's fine , he had thought to himself. He'll do it when he meets up with Mark another time.
He had underestimated the difference of what graduating would do to Mark.
His seniors had told him varying differences between being a teenager and an adult— getting a driving license, able to drink alcohol, go out clubbing— they were so minor changes to his everyday routine that he doesn’t think Mark would change either.
But he did.
Donghyuck had to do a double take the first time he had seen Mark when he came from university.
He’s gorgeous.
Entering university had done Mark wonders.
From the awkward, goody two shoes he remembered of Mark, the older had started dressing up more nicely, going glassless and having his bangs gelled up to reveal his forehead.
He looked nothing like the kid Donghyuck knew back then.
In all honestly, he had felt intimidated with the new Mark. That is before the older managed to trip on his own feet and fell flat on the ground.
He was as he remembered.
Much to his dismay, he quickly learns that Mark took the spot of being the popular kid in his university. The older would never brag about it given his personality, but Donghyuck can judge it himself by the number of followers and comments Mark has on Instagram.
“You…you have an Instagram?”
He never made one for himself. His aunt didn’t like it.
“Everyone has Instagram these days. Except for you.”
Donghyuck ignores the snide comment, focusing instead on the comments.
You look hot, Mark! Hit me up!
Hii, can I have your number?
He gives Mark the phone back in favour of not feeling like he’s about to vomit.
And a month later, after constant pestering from his side, Mark had brought him to his university— the number of people stopping them on their walk to chat with Mark had been more than the fingers he could count in both hands. He tried his best to bite back the jealousy simmering inside him.
“Oh, who’s this?” This time it was a pretty girl- hair tied back in a ponytail as she greeted them with a smile on her face.
“This is Donghyuck. He’s like my brother.” Mark laughs, a blush colouring his cheeks.
He didn’t know what hurt more, the fact that Mark was obviously into her or the fact that he was brother-zoned.
Honestly speaking, Donghyuck wouldn’t lie and say he didn’t see it coming— Mark’s popularity. As nerdy and awkward his personality had been, Mark Lee was likeable, friendly and a people’s person.
He was charming, simply said.
And there was only so much he could do to hold onto being the only one to shower Mark with affection until the older had graduated. It didn’t help in the slightest that the older had presented as an alpha. People had stereotype about sub-gender and while it wasn’t as prominent as it was back in the 80s— there was no denying the fact that a person’s first thought when hearing someone’s an alpha would range from either “ He’s a fucking asshole” to “ Damn, he’s pretty hot.”
And of course, Mark, being Mark, with his good-mannerisms and kind-hearted nature could be anything but the latter. Being an alpha boosted his reputation up as the most legible person to date.
The amount of people he’d be up against to gain Mark’s attention was endless and the overwhelming feeling of insecurity that washes over him when it takes Mark two days to reply to his message felt horrible.
He had tried to keep his chin up, comforting himself that when he presents, he'll make his confession. With his constitution, Donghyuck was sure he’d been an omega— he had all the features of one. His aunt had said so, too, that once he presents as an omega, Mark wouldn’t be able to resist him.
It was a simple and arrogant plan. Very narcissistic of him to think that way.
But it was a plan nonetheless.
However, the day never came.
At age sixteen, instead of feeling the slick wetness he’d expected lining his inner thighs, all he felt was the hotness of his blood running through his vein, the heady thought of wanting to claim rather than be claimed.
On the day of his coming of age, Lee Donghyuck had presented as an alpha.
If a line had been drawn between him and Mark when the older had graduated before him, what laid now was a ten-foot-high wall separating them. The probability of getting with Mark was near zero. It felt like fate was mocking him for even thinking he had a chance with Mark.
He remembers falling into misery, crying into night the day after he presented.
“Oh dear, Hyuckie…” His aunt had looked at him with pity as she stroke his hair. “Don’t give up. With enough hardwork, you might just get him.”
And so he had worked hard, to be an ‘omega’ rather than an alpha and his aunt had watched over him with a serene smile.
Mark was a traditional alpha through and through. While he never expressed his thoughts about same sub-gender relationship, he only dated betas and omegas. Same sub-gender relationships were common these days though, and so he had fallen back on the thought that maybe Mark might be able to overlook it if he was omega enough.
He flirted with Mark constantly, made him flustered and blushing beyond belief in hopes that Mark would think of him as a potential boyfriend or lover instead of an annoying flirtatious best friend.
It didn’t matter what people said.
He was aware of the comments and insults from his peers about how un-alpha-like he was acting. But he could handle that. After all, who were they to judge? The only thing that mattered to him was Mark and Mark only and the older had never said anything encrypting about his personality.
They wished they were him.
Wished they could be with Mark like he was.
His love for Mark could amount up to anything.
Anything.
Until the day it all comes crashing down.
“You’re… you’re mated?” Donghyuck feels his stomach sink.
Mark’s cheeks redden at the statement, and he looks embarrassed as he wills the warmth away. He nods his head. It was endearing to see the alpha embarrassed, if only the current topic didn’t make his stomach churn horribly.
Fate was snickering at him.
“I wanted to tell you first before anything, because you’re my… b-best friend.”
In another circumstances Donghyuck would’ve taken the opportunity to torment Mark about him admitting he was his best friend out loud. But he feels like drowning.
“Who?”
He absentmindedly finds himself asking despite the inner turmoil of a wave pulling him down, crashing against him everytime he tries to get a breather.
Mark gives him the most beautiful smile he’s ever given, eyes sparkling and smiling.
He could write a thousand poems just from the alpha’s smile alone.
“It’s Jeno.”
Lee Jeno.
Donghyuck remembers him.
He’s seen Jeno multiple times. He’s spoken to him before too. They share the same circle of friend after all. A flash of a black-haired boy smiling timidly at him pops up in his head. He especially remembers the sweet scent that permitted the air when he first saw Jeno.
An omega.
He feels phantom hands drowning him further to a darker abyss.
Of course— Of course! Why did he think otherwise?
Fate was cackling now.
“Cool.” He replies, feeling light-headed.
He can hear fates’ word: “And here you thought you had a chance, huh?”
Fate was cruel.
“I’m happy for you, Mark.”
He feels like dying.