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Dear Kuro-san,
It’s a letter from your favourite brute~ . Don’t miss the kisses on the envelope, they’re just for you! And don’t rip this up! I know you’re tempted right now but if you do, you can’t hear what I have to say and pass it on to the rest, you know? You’re a better guy than me, I know you can do it!
Mama doesn’t wanna be morose so this won’t start with ‘by the time you’re reading this’ but you know that I’ve already left Japan~ . I’m not too far, just next door in China - but definitely even further by the time you’re reading this, haha! It takes a little while to decide where you want to go, especially if you’re feeling a liiitle reluctant. But there are so many festivals booked, I don’t even have time to think! And I know, I know, I’ve left things in suuuch a mess . Very nasty business, very tricky but Mama might have resolved it just fine now!
See Kuro-san, I’m sure you more than understand. I do lots and lots of jobs but I haven’t held a gun like that in a loooong time. It’s dangerous in the hands of a guy like me, even worse in the hands of a guy other than me. What can I say? My second mistake was letting someone else hold it and my first was not leaving sooner. I’m sure you get it. Wouldn’t so many people have been happier if the delinquent you had disappeared forever first? Do you ever think about that? The smiles and lives left if that particular you had never come into existence?
But you’re a hero now so it’s a biiit different!
We’re not so different, Kuro-san, but we’re different enough. I’m never going to get tired of pushing you down and feeling you push back but more than that you have a nobility that’s a biiit enviable. Even down to your sewing - a guy like me only knows how to destroy, you know? So I’m sure you understand why I’ve gone in some small way.
Mama’s not there to wipe his children’s tears so won’t you take my place, ex-delinquent-san? If anyone can explain to them, I know it’s the strong and reliable hero who could always take me down when the world needed it.
Thank you xoxoxo
From your favourite opponent
Madara Mikejima
*
Dear Chiaki-san,
Bam, pow, woosh! It’s a letter from the antagonist! Is that a good tokusatsu entrance? Mama hasn’t watched any in a long time. Maybe not since being a kid and there’s none here in Canada! Isn’t that weird, to imagine a world without your heroes? It’s all cold and snow here, sometimes it feels like nothing for miles. No festivals on here. That’s why you should hold on tight to make sure you stay around, Chiaki-san or that’s how you’ll leave all of us!
Kuro-san sure is crafty, managing to send a letter to me right before I left China. I’m not sure if he told you about sending one back or not, he’s such a lovely, straightforward guy. But the letter was so strongly worded, he nearly made this poor ol’ Mama cry! I would ask when kids become so rebellious but it’s hard to count Kuro as one of mine… So much grown up insight!
You understand having kids, don’t you? Former leader of Ryuseitai, looking over the new leader’s light and offering guidance. How admirable ~ . You understand how painful it is when you have to keep things from those kids to keep their feelings intact and their dreams alive, don’t you? Even if it’s to the point of being controlling or having to crush some of those kid’s aspirations just to keep them going… you get that, right, Chiaki-san? You’re definitely a hero with interesting means…
Ahaha, now don’t be too down about what I wrote! I’m the antagonist, remember? I’ll lie, trick and manipulate all I want to get somewhere and leave you to pave over the path I left so no aspiring villain or do-gooder hero follows me. That’s part of a hero’s job, right~?
All I’m saying is that Mama doesn’t want his kids to worry! Was me leaving really so sudden when it’s a natural thing for the antagonist to leave when the show’s over? The big bad has been vanquished and there was only one left to get rid of. And I’m leaving them in the hands of a strong hero. I know your doubts but I also know you personally and that’s why I’m moooore than happy to leave everyone with you there to watch over evil and beat it off! Kanata-san is… Well, my dear Kanata-san will be more than fine with you around! We don’t need a rogue ruining things any further, right?
Chiaki-kun, honestly speaking, I haven’t saved anyone once in my life the way that you have. Every hero needs an antagonist and we already know the consequences of me trying to be a hero. Even when my music cue played to save everyone, I somehow missed it and now I’m just doing what I want selfishly and dragging others in. It’s okay because I’m the antagonist but it’s important to know when your cue to leave is! Purple was never really my colour… But red was definitely yours. It suits you, you know. You should be proud of how much sharper you’ve gotten.
I’m sure I can leave it to you super hero-san! Won’t you clean up my mess and soothe people once again? Kuro-san hasn’t done it at all so I want to call on a real hero this time.
Thank you!!!
Your favourite antagonist
Madara Mikejima
*
Dear Kanata-san,
It’s your favourite rogue! Or least favourite rogue? Who knows! Writing after drinking far more than you intended is very hard! And the liquor in Russia is very tough, you know! It’s nothing like water. But I don’t know how else to write this letter other than liquid courage!
Chiaki was soooo stern with me and I’m sure it’s partly your influence because you’re always that stern with me! And that makes a lot of sense, I more than deserve it! I failed to help you escape in time and then, I let you die, gee, I would be pretty mad as well! Still, I can’t help but orbit you, look on after you, meddle with you and somehow make it way, way, way worse! I absoluuuutely can’t be close to you all or I’m gonna do what I usually do and I don’t get how you can’t see it right now! But you will. Just ask Rei-san.
I don’t know how many more words I can say it in or how many more actions I can take to prove it, Kanata-san. We’re not kids anymore, you know! You’re more than familiar with the outside world with more than enough allies to know why doubting me is a good idea! Won’t you just use me as your wild card and your gun and not your trusty shield? I’ll return when I’m needed for the rest of the story. And don’t think I’m not dismantling what I can of the cult overseas wherever I find it. But I can guarantee me being close won’t fix anything!
You have a really good set up right now and it was all you . Much better than being rotated like a god, being loved like a human by people around you who are good people, there’s no better ending than that. I’m trying to make sure you keep a better ending like that. Won’t you understand my side Kanata-san? If I’m able to walk to the post office to mail this without getting sick and lost on the way off - well, I’m actually not sure what I’m drinking - would you understand me? I hope so. It might be the first time you have in a long time. I hope so.
Thank you.
From your (least?) favourite rouge
Madara Mikejima
*
Dear Rei-san,
It’s your favourite disciple! Or should I say successor? Ahaha, it’s all the same. Didn’t you say we’re two sides of the same coin? Italy has a loooot of those old coins and the tour guides are showing me every single one! You always liked that sort of history too so I think you’d like this too.
It’s almost sooo embarrassing to have you of all people be called into the conversation. I must have really worried Kanata-san with the way that the letter you sent was crafted. I know it was messy, I really only vaguely remember writing and sending it when I was waaay too drunk to be doing anything but chugging water. You haven’t spoken to me that gently in years! And that’s not a bad thing, Rei-san, I’ll accept any tone of voice from you, my admirable teacher~! I was just a biiit… surprised.
You had a lot of interesting things to say for me to mull over. You know everything you say is my coveted treasure! But this is a bit hard to figure out~? Rei-san is so smart and you won’t let me hide a thing so surely you understand the stakes. More than anyone else even.
You’ve seen what it was like to watch people die in front of you. You, someone so kind and thoughtful, have even died yourself. Can you imagine, someone possibly getting shot in front of you? I wouldn’t be surprised if you’d experienced that, Rei-san! So kind and wonderful, I’m sure someone has forced you into that position one way or another. That’s why you need to call on me during those times and you know I’ll come running, even from overseas!
But this time doesn’t count!
I don’t think being mean to you would work on you so couldn’t Mama kindly ask to be left alone to follow whatever festival all throughout the globe? This is good for me! Every party in the world is free to me! I’ve been to so many masked festivals, I don’t even think you can imagine… I looove the thrill of being unknown! People really go wild when they don’t know who you are~
Isn’t this enough happiness for everyone?
Thank you~
Your favourite disciple
Madara Mikejima
*
Dear Leo-san,
It’s your favourite Mama! I’m all the way in Brazil now, do you remember going with Mama another time before? It’s really a completely different landscape when you go to a place alone compared to with someone else so maybe Mama is feeling nostalgic for that time…
You seem to also have been feeling nostalgic, Leo-san, from what you sent me! You know, I didn’t expect so much recollection from you. You were in such a bad state, I was sure our first months of travelling would blur together for you. But that was okay because Mama would remember! We didn’t need any photos as long as I saw everything! But it seems like Leo-san was observing me a bit more than I thought.
It must be something serious if Leo-san is admonishing me for running away by travelling. I want to promise it really was just to see every festival but it looks like no one believes me. Sometimes, I wonder if I believe me. But Mama is still trying to have a fun time without his children! It feels good to not hurt anyone, you know?
I know you’ve been asking but I really can’t tell you what's going on. There’s a lot of twisted rot in the industry, isn’t there? Even you came face to face with it at some point. Is it so wrong to want to keep your loved ones clear of it? It’s hard to clean off rot, Leo-san. We barely managed it last time.
Some things, it’s best Mama keeps away from his children! And you’re definitely one of his favourite children so being this direct is a bit embarrassing, you know? I’ve already caused soooo much trouble but you still took the pains to write out music on paper, almost always on the lines, and sending it to me to cheer me up. It’s a wonderful melody, Leo-san. It really relieved my spirits. I hope I find a feeling like that at a festival here soon.
Thank you
Your favourite Mama
Madara Mikejima
*
Dear Kohaku-san,
It’s your favourite past partner-in-crime! I really, really want to start this with Mama but I can already hear you getting mad and no one else would take it at my word! Isn’t this embarrassing? All those letters and everyone ignored what I said in them! Well, maybe I was ignoring them too. It’s easy here in Germany. A lot goes on in a city and you can sit and drink and watch~. I haven’t really bothered to go to a festival here. I wonder if you’d like it but you’re too young to have any beer!
Let’s be quick to the point, you’re quick on the uptake. I want to apologise for dragging you further into a seedy world full of adults with the worst intentions. I knowwww, Kohaku-san, you’ve already been in it but didn’t it get a bit too real recently? Dying outside of the idol world isn’t something you can take back. But at least Double Face was something that could die, somewhat peacefully so you could live for yourself. Shouldn’t you prefer to live instead of writing again and again after a partner who nearly doomed you? That really goes for all of you, sending me letters…
You have a good future ahead, Kohaku-san. Everyone who’s sent me something so far has a good future ahead. The war is over, a great struggle for the future of the idol industry has been put to bed somewhat, more and more, people are regaining footing and taking steps by themselves. No one needs an opponent, an antagonist, a disciple, a Mama or a partner-in-crime. Not without going backwards or worse, going down into more blood and more misery.
There’s deep rot in this world and I’m a container for it, you see? For a second there, I grabbed at you and thought you were the same as me. I forced an alliance on you and felt an equal standing for the first time in a last time. But all it took was one gun, one bullet. At least it didn’t take a life!
I can sympathise with you all here but it’s my job to be a monster so being heartless is just fine with me. In the meantime, be a good kid, Kohaku-san. Stick with your unit and go along with their fun, talk to that internet friend and get to know each other more, really dive into school and have looots of fun! Live a normal, happy and life and Mama promises that when I’m back, you’ll already be so used to me being gone that you won’t notice.
Thank you
Your favourite (former) partner-in-crime
Madara Mikejima
*
Dear Maguro,
Can I call myself your favourite brother? You’ve been getting along well with Chiaki which I think is good but I don’t know if the title is mine! Isn’t that silly? But I can’t complain. It’s what happens when you’re away for a long time, after all.
I’ve been a real coward, haven’t I? We never got to play tag when we were younger except once and you told me it’s not fair to run away from someone who can’t run properly after you. I thought you were just cheating at the game and maybe you were because that’s the whole point of the game but a lot of that is right! I have such a smart younger sister, don’t I?
I want to scold you for going through others and my own letters but I don’t really have a right for that as an older brother right now. I haven’t been here for a while and I wasn’t meant to be. I really did my best to rebut every single letter that got through. It had to be some sort of fate, right? For so many to reach the place I was staying right on the day I was about to leave. If it’s the work of some god, I really don’t understand their motivations but I’m starting to understand the letters everyone wrote to me.
I’m really not the best at being considerate so ignoring people when they tell me they need me and want me to come back is pretty easy for me! I’ve been doing it this entire time after all, even when I was still in Japan. Even when I literally couldn’t go anywhere else! I’m selfish like that, just like our parents taught us how to be. It’s a pretty effective way of getting what you want, especially because it’s ruthless.
But that’s the problem, isn’t it! Let me bow my head - maybe I was wrong. Ahaha, I’m sure you’d want to force me to read this out loud with my head bowed but I’ll never do it, this is the admission you’re getting! I really didn’t expect so many letters and so constantly, all saying the same thing, from so many people. I’ve met a lot of good people, haven’t I?
I think you’re one of my favourite, best people that I’ve met, Maguro. I still remember that day when you were brought home. You kept me waiting for quite a while because you needed extra time in the hospital. I was more than impatient by that point. But, well, offering you my finger and feeling your little hand take it and grip it - I think that was probably one of the most important days of my life. I’m sorry I let go of that hand so easily to save my own feelings. I won’t ignore other people’s feelings anymore. Or at least I’ll try not to. I’ll try not to leave that quickly.
Where I am right now isn’t important because I’m coming back to Japan right now. Would you - no, would everyone wait for me to come back and try to stay? Wellll… Not forever but I can promise it’s not running away next time! You know I love festivals. But no matter where I go, no matter how many I see, how much fun I have, my favourites are always at home with people I care about. Who would have thought, huh?
At the least, I'll definitely be back for Christmas. It's already snowing where I am and there are lights everywhere. You'd love to see it, I'm sure, so I put photos in for you. And I promise I'm bringing you a gift so I hope you're ready.
Wait for me. I won’t be long.
Thank you.
Soon to be your favourite brother
Madara Mikejima