Chapter Text
Her determination was something that often got her into trouble as far as the Brotherhood was concerned; she’d managed to end up on deck duty twice that week already and the higher-ups were stating to notice. Until then Paladin Danse was the one to dish out her punishments as he saw fit. He knew she was far too ambitious to let her serve on night watch on ground, she’d probably get herself killed by going after a suspicious noise. He settled on deck duty to greet the changing shifts only because he knew immobility and lack of adventure took the wind clean out of her sails.
So she sulked between the vertibirds, forcing a professional tone with oncoming knights and wishing good luck to the ones who took leave. This last foul up was because she had managed to put her life as well as Danse’s in danger by getting them surrounded by ferals.
“We lived, though, didn’t we? We’re fine” Danse scowled at her as he radioed for a vertibird to pick them up. “What you did was reckless, initiate. How can you expect to move forward to becoming a knight if you continuously put us in these threatening situations?” She sighed and followed closely behind him until they were back onboard the Prydwen.
“Deck duty, initiate, two days” she began to fuss but immediately shut her mouth when he turned to her with a frown. “When you stop making tactical errors, I’ll be sure to tell Elder Maxson to consider you for promotion. Until then, you need to learn to take orders.”
She sat down at the far end of the deck away from the body of the ship and sighed. She had her orange jumpsuit peeled down to her waist with the arms tied around her. She wore a messy white tank top and a black hat, one might have mistaken her for a prewar mechanic. It was the middle of the day, during this time no one really left or returned to the ship so she was very bored. She dropped the now empty nuka cola bottle off the deck and followed it with her eyes for as far as she could before it fell too low, somehow she wanted to hear it shatter though she knew it wasn’t possible.
“Stand at attention, initiate” the voice behind her wasn’t Danse’s so she sprung to her feet quickly and turned quickly. “Kells- uh- sir” she winced, she still wasn’t used to being formal again, it had been a long time and the Minutemen weren’t nearly as official. There was a painfully awkward silence between them for a brief moment before he spoke up.
“Elder Maxson requests an audience, initiate” she nodded and he turned away to leave. She hadn’t spoken with the elder privately yet and she was definitely nervous to hear what he had to say. Her footsteps seemed to echo as she met him at the bulkhead, her hands clasped together nervously as she stopped a few feet behind him.
“Elder Maxson, you asked for me?” he turned to face her and his expression was about as flat as she thought manageable. He stared her down for a minute or two and she felt herself getting uncomfortable as the silence thickened.
“It has come to my attention that you have been on strict orders to patrol the deck, do you mind telling me why?” She fidgeted and pulled on her fingers behind her back, she couldn’t look him in the eye then and she gulped.
“I’ve been not following orders well, sir, I’ve put my life as well as Paladin Danse’s life in danger multiple times. I don’t understand the punishment though, sir, because we were unharmed and the missions have been successful.” She shifted her weight to her other hip and looked back to him, meeting his eyes. It sent chills down her spine to see him so unresponsive, no could be this unresponsive without thinking something over.
“Insubordination is punishable, initiate” She frowned but he wasn’t finished. “Paladin Danse has told me that your missions together have been successful, so I believe a promotion is in order.” Her eyes widened, no fucking way, she thought, keeping her jaw from dropping. “From here on out you are a Knight and your discipline will be left to me.” She groaned, there it was, the catch. She was sure his regulations were far stricter than Danse’s. “That’ll be all, Knight, dismissed.”
A few hours later Danse returned on deck and he was a little peeved that she wasn’t there. He made his way through the ship until he found her working on a set of power armor and he cleared his throat and stepped out of his own armor.
“Paladin, good to see you back!” she said, beaming as he seethed. “What are you doing in the armor bay, initiate?” She smirked and patted on the chest plate of the armor she was working on and he cocked his head.
“I got promoted earlier today, Danse, I’m a knight now!” he couldn’t find words. “Thanks for putting in a good word for me” he crossed his arms and a smile started creeping over his face and his brow relaxed. “Congratulations, knight” he said, nodding.
He looked around the room and let his arms unfold, “let’s get you a drink” he said finally and she followed him with prime enthusiasm. All the time she had known him he had been very prim and proper and she doubted he even knew how to have fun. She was surprised when he kept the smile on his face for a few minutes as he ordered them a couple of rounds.
A few other knights joined in on their small celebration, he seemed a little put off with this, but she was ready for everyone to acknowledge her knighthood. This was the praise she thought she deserved and though she knew it wouldn’t last for long, she reveled in it.
Hours later and everyone on the ship was either asleep or leaving and she found herself unable to stay asleep for longer than fifteen minutes at a time. She walked the halls barefoot so not to make too much sound and found herself heading for the deck. She climbed down the ladder and froze as she heard pacing coming from the bulkhead, she was surprised that the Elder would still be awake. There would be no sneaking past him and she prepared herself for a lecture. As she took the last step down from the ladder they made eye contact and both of them were still. She had forgotten what she was wearing and once she realized her face flushed. It was a t shirt way too big for her and some shorts you couldn’t see under the shirt.
Though he didn’t say anything and didn’t beckon her, her legs willed her to move towards him and away from her planned destination. He watched her as she walked, like she was afraid to make a noise and she seemed so much smaller, daintier, when she wasn’t on duty. She was quiet but now stood maybe two feet in front of him, her face twisted into what he could only think of as concerned. He was suddenly very aware of how he was standing and straightened up from his slouch.
“Elder, why don’t you sleep?” she asked, her voice was quiet and he had to listen closely despite the quietness on the rest of the ship. He couldn’t turn away from her like he could before, these were different terms, they were her terms and she felt intimidating in a way.
“There’s too much to do, too much to think about. Knight, I would ask you the same thing.” She ignored his question and instead pierced into him with her eyes. He was so young, so much younger than he looked and it broke her heart that he had fallen into this position so early on in his life. He didn’t need another soldier, he needed someone to take care of him. She was his senior, if not in rank, in life, and she felt almost obligated to take him upon her as a responsibility.
“I’ve seen things, Arthur, things in battle that I’m sure would make even you cringe. You know I’m not from this time, I’m sure.” She paused and took in his mildly confused look, apparently he hadn’t read up on her as much as she thought he had and suddenly she felt embarrassed. She should have been more modest, but now was not the time for regret, she pressed forward but lowered her eyes to the floor.
“I see you, and I think it’s a shame that you’re in the prime of youth and you’re left to lead an entire army.” He tensed up and took note that he needed to review her file as soon as she left. “I want you to know that I’m here for you.” She fell quiet and shot him one last glance before leaving him to his thoughts. She slipped out the door to the deck and he was now very curious.
He read everything he could find about her, from her reports with Danse to her Vault-Tec spreadsheet, he wanted to know everything. The later it got the more he felt he knew her, where she was coming from made sense to him now. She was a lot older than she looked. He thought about what she had said, that she was there for him, it made him, one way or another, comfortable. Next time they crossed paths he’d ask her what she meant, but for now he needed at least some rest.
She enjoyed being back in the field, mowing down enemies with ease behind a minigun. This was her comfort zone, this was what she called familiar. Being in power armor was a great feeling, she felt more powerful than she had even when she was back in the army. When she was enlisted she wasn’t permitted to wear power armor but now she had her own set. She didn’t cackle wildly like she wanted to because she was worried Danse might sign her up for mental evaluation. He was impressed with her, though, so that was enough to put a smile on her face if she weren’t already smiling.
“Hostiles terminated” she said, trying not to giggle at the formality of it all though her voice did shake noticeably, gaining a raised brow from Danse. With their mission completed they headed back to the Prydwen with high morale.
“Didn’t even get shot once, did you?” Danse asked, checking out the condition of her power armor as she docked it to a station. She shook her head and ceremoniously banged on the chest plate as they walked back towards the mess hall. She was smiling as she watched the other soldiers milling about and listened to a knight and a scribe recanting a story about the mission they had just been on. She was also comfortable in this setting, people watching was a hobby of hers and she was genuinely happy watching the world go by as she sat and watched.
“I’ll take my leave, Knight, I’ve been allowed a shower, so if you don’t mind.” She patted Danse on the back as he left her at the bar. She sat there for a while longer, listening as the knight and scribe began disagreeing on the actual events of the mission.
When she did leave it was about 8 o’clock and she walked towards the stairway before stopping in her steps. Maxson had just left his quarters and headed down the hall towards her. There was a half second when they regarded each other as he continued past her and she nodded at him. There was that awful heat in her belly again and she hurried up the stairs to her bunk.
His mind raced, he thought about her face and where she was headed and if he’d see her again in the middle of the night. He forced the thought from his mind, he needed to be around his soldiers and didn’t need fleeting distractions. An hour later and he was ready to call it a day, making an appearance usually did the trick for bringing up spirits and he felt accomplished. As he headed back to his room he heard a familiar voice accompanied by heavy sobs.
“It’s gonna be alright” she assured the weeping scribe, “everyone has their bad days.” The much younger woman was a heaving mess and she sat by her side and stroked her hair. “Just let it out, I’m sure you’ll feel better in the morning.”
Maxson paused, listening for a while before he continued on his path. Clearly she had skill on the battlefield, but she was also a comforting influence. He nodded to himself, thinking about her voice and how consoling she came off. He slid off his coat and draped it over the back of his chair. He sat there in front of his terminal mindlessly lost in space as the roar of the Prydwen began to slowly quiet down. Everyone would be asleep soon and he waited with baited breath to see if she’d come to him.
An hour passed and he stopped typing to turn around to the door. She still hadn’t come by and he felt a sense of urgency. He stood up and opened the door, thinking perhaps she saw it closed and decided not to bother him. Maybe she fell asleep. Maybe she was waiting for him to tell her he needed her to be there for him like she was for the scribe. He stood silently at the doorway, staring up towards the upper level of the ship where he thought she might be if she hadn’t already snuck out to the deck.
He shifted and listened to the floor creak beneath him and his ears perked up as he heard someone coming down the stairs. It was another knight, not the one he wanted. He was so frustrated at that point that he nearly barked out orders until he saw her pop her head up from the ladder. She had snuck past his door earlier without making noise. Her stealth would be useful, but otherwise problematic if he was waiting for her.
She looked around to make sure the coast was clear before sneaking onto the level. She had a similar outfit on to the one she was wearing the night before. Maxson cleared his throat and she turned around with a deer-in-headlights look. It was very innocent and it surprised him.
“Knight, do you have a minute?” his voice was hushed, but his tone was the same as it ever was. He stepped back into his room and she followed him, again she seemed smaller and it confused him to no end.
“How tall are you, Knight?” he couldn’t let the mystery go on any further and she smiled. It took a minute but she slowly stood up straighter “5’11, sir” she said throwing her shoulders back. She was now almost at eye level with him and he raised a brow, “why do you make yourself so… small?”
She shrugged, “you’re harder to find if you’re smaller.” They were quiet for a while as he searched her face for something to go on but she was truly an enigma to him.
“You should smile when you think, Elder” she said, her smile widening and the laugh lines around her eyes becoming more pronounced. Her smile was almost contagious, the corners of his mouth twitched ever so slightly, but he couldn’t bring himself to grin.
“What did you need, Elder?” she swung her arms behind her back and clasped her hands together. He got a great look at her figure and had to force his eyes to meet hers. He practically shrugged, he couldn’t think clearly when she was around. Without warning she grabbed his hand and rubbed her thumb along his palm, he didn’t pull away though he thought about it. Her eyes were focused on his hand now and he watched her curiously.
“You seem like you’re more stressed today” she said, still not looking him in the face. “Is there any way I can help? I used to know my way around a keyboard pretty well, I could type for you.” She dropped his hand and reached for the other, repeating the small massage. He stopped trying to understand her for a moment, she had such delicate-looking hands but a strong grip, it made him shudder for all kinds of reasons.
“That… won’t be necessary” he said slowly, he tried to hold onto her hand but she pulled away before he could close his hand. She looked into his eyes again and sighed, he wondered what she was thinking about because her expression fell flat.
“Arthur, please talk to me, you know you can. You know you’re safe with me” he heard what she was saying but he felt very differently. Although it was true, he did feel safe around her, he felt more than intimidated by her because for some reason she saw into him. She treated him like a person instead of some fearsome leader and yet he was afraid to speak freely with her. He was interested to see what they could get into, but he didn’t want to lose what they had, whatever this was.
“I don’t know” he said, quieter than he had been speaking. She was feeling similar, curious about how far she could get before he turned her away. She was daring herself to reach out and touch him, maybe she’d do it if she had a little more to drink, but she wasn’t about to do it now. So they stood there, sizing each other up in the almost comfortable silence. Then she cleared her throat, bringing him back from his thoughts.
“Would it be too much to ask for you to stay with me tonight?” her eyes widened and she covered her mouth with her hand to hide her shock. She did say she would be there for him but she didn’t think that he’d think that she would just hop in bed with him. He quickly put up his hands, sensing the error,
“Just stay with me, we don’t have to do anything. I just need… comfort” he almost wished she’d hit him instead of look at him like that. He felt embarrassed for not knowing how to put words together but he saw that her expression softened. She lowered her hand and smiled with her eyes even though her mouth didn’t match.
“I could do that, yeah.” She heard her pulse in her ears as she agreed. She didn’t think she could until she saw him smile. Actually smile. She watched as he hit the switch near his bed and the lights went out. There was a bit of shifting that went on that she could only hear followed by the mattress straining beneath him. She laid down after him and cozied up behind him, wrapping her arm around him and setting her chin against his shoulder.
He had never felt so comfortable in his life. There was nothing sexual or even romantic about it, but he couldn’t think of anything he’d choose over this feeling. She cradled him against her and sighed as she settled, she didn’t sound irritated or inconvenienced, or at least he hoped she wasn’t. Normally he’d strip all the way down but he didn’t want her to be uncomfortable, he left his underwear on. He fell asleep very soon after they laid down.
She, on the other hand, was losing her mind. While she enjoyed this more than she could admit to herself, she wanted to run. She was never good at expressing her feelings and he made her feel a certain way that made her weak in the knees. She wanted to continue viewing him as a leader, but she was slowly coming away from that. She wanted to do this all the time, lay there with him, but it terrified her. She was not capable of being in love, she didn’t know how to do it. What if he fell in love with her, how was she supposed to deal with that?
He unconsciously reached for her hand on his chest and she could have screamed. She found herself begging repeatedly not to let herself feel anything but respect for this man but she was losing the battle quick. If anything she wanted to roll him over and have her way with him, but as far as emotions went, she wasn’t attached. She wanted to make him feel good in more ways than just bringing him comfort, but she was afraid he’d get the wrong idea and become emotionally compromised, he seemed like the type.
She considered leaving in the night so that it wouldn’t be suspicious for her to leave his room in the morning. She shrugged that idea off, though; she was too old to let her pride be effected by the thoughts of others. Then she thought maybe she’d do it anyway, to protect the elder’s pride. We’ll see, she thought to herself before she fell asleep.