Chapter Text
“Big brother?”
Metal Sonic didn’t stop his movements at her words. He didn’t divert from his task. He didn’t acknowledge her at all. Sage watched as he continued writing something seated at his desk, hunched over his work and focused.
“Big brother?”
Metal Sonic still didn’t look at her. Cubot moved to stand beside him, alternating between looking at the both of them. He steeled himself, before he floated upwards and poked Metal Sonic’s head.
The reaction was an immediate slap.
“Big brother,” Sage tries again as she entered his closet recharge area, Orbot following closely behind her. Orbot rushed towards Cubot, helping him up and whispering something to him as Sage refocused on her brother.
“Metal Sonic,” she attempts, hesitating for five seconds when he still chose to ignore her. “Sonic is waiting for you outside.”
Still no reaction.
(She wants to log into his processors and make him go. She wants to dig into his mind- actually dig in the way he made her promise never to do- and rip out every secret he has by force. She’s still so so mad at him, and she doesn't have the data to process her feelings, and Father refuses to acknowledge the incident even happened-)
“Sonic,” she tries one final time, ignoring the way Orbot and Cubot jolted, flinching into one another. “Your counterpart awaits you.”
Metal Sonic slowly turned to her, his optics pinpricks against his obsidian sclera. His claws dug into his work desk and pulled as he turned to face her, digging into the wood.
Sage spared a glance down at the damage- his choice to have a wooden desk was an abnormality, but she was told he preferred it- before facing him.
“Cubot and Orbot have told me you have not done your monthly excursion since I arrived,” Metal Sonic’s head snapped towards them, Cubot quickly slamming his square body shut as Orbot waved a hand across his throat, shushing her. “If you refuse me again, I will take you to your counterpart by force.”
Metal Sonic’s head slowly lifted from where he was shooting daggers at them back to her, his head tilting slowly.
She wanted him to snap at her. She wanted him to snap at them. She wanted him to say something, he hasn’t said anything to any of them since his whispered apology before he…
Before he…
Sage didn’t like crying. It was inefficient, it clogged up her processors, it made her feel bad.
She’s been crying herself into a shutdown every night since the incident.
(Her big brother, who was so quiet around her but still used to be there, kept a wide berth from her.)
Metal Sonic turned away from her, picked his pencil back up, and returned to his work.
Orbot sighed, before he motioned Cubot away. Cubot nodded, but still sent Metal Sonic a sad look before he left the room, on route to Eggman. Orbot approached this time, looking up at Metal Sonic and slowly moving upwards.
“Big bro?” Orbot whispered, leaning in closer. “I know you don’t want to go. And- and I’m sorry that we told Sage that you used to leave every month. But-but now you can leave weekly! And I know it’s with Sonic and I know you probably don’t want to be with him… but this is good for you. Being with Shadow and Amy, it’s really good for you. They can help you.”
Then Orbot looked away, pulling the plating off his fingers in the way he knew Father hated before saying, “You know. More than- than we can.”
Father has commanded that Metal Sonic not be left alone anymore. He’s had Cubot or Orbot following him around, making sure he stays in the base until further notice. He’s had Cubot or Orbot follow Metal Sonic, because her brother would lock the other badniks out of the room or crawl through a vent to get away from them.
He’s stop destroying them outright.
It’s like he doesn’t care anymore.
(But Sonic came back, the day after Eggman eventually kicked him out, and Cubot let him in. Cubot let him in and led Sonic to her and the two of them formulated a plan, leaving Cubot in guard duty.
Metal Sonic would leave the base, on a weekly basis, and Cubot and Orbot would cover for him.
It felt wrong lying to Father, but Father simply didn’t care enough about Metal Sonic to get him the help he so sorely needed.
It made her so sad, realizing Sonic cared more about her brother than her Father ever did.)
Metal Sonic didn’t like when Orbot spoke badly about himself. He would get angry, he would demand that Orbot stop, and encourage him in that short, blunt way of his; where he would tell Orbot nothing but the truth on the matter and let him stay by his side.
Metal Sonic didn’t respond.
Sage sighed as Orbot wilted, floating closer to the floor. She didn’t understand why Metal Sonic was being difficult. She didn’t understand the point of putting up a fight was, when he knew how this would end.
She lifted her hand and focused, watching as Metal Sonic suddenly twitched violently. His body calmed as he stood up, and when he turned to face her, Sage could see her influence dancing over his head, an emptiness in his eyes that wasn’t there before.
Orbot frowned, shaking his head slowly. “Sage.”
“I know,” she snapped, glaring at Metal Sonic. “Orbot you think I don’t know that he hates this? You think I don’t know that I am causing our rift to become bigger? But I am so angry at him. I’m so angry at you,” she clarified, moving closer to Metal Sonic. “I do not care if you hate me. I do not care what you think of me. What I care about is that you’re alive, and this is going to get you the help you need. So hate me Metal Sonic. Feel something for me.”
(Even in his thoughts he was quiet and Sage felt herself flicker from red to blue- she loves him so much and she just wants her brother to be normal again how can she fix this?)
“Come along Metal Sonic,” she said, turning around. “Orbot will still be here when you return from your outing. We need to meet up with Sonic.”
She willed him to move and he did- and if she noticed that his footfalls were a little heavier, his forefoot plating moving slower than it should be- she ignored it.
(He didn’t want maintenance anymore.)
And if Sonic shot her the same look Orbot did, one she learned meant disappointment, sadness, resignation, she ignored it all the same, and disappeared as she released Metal Sonic from her control.
And if she found her way back to Metal Sonic’s room, found her way back to Orbot who simply opened his arms for her-
She wished she didn’t care.
Because maybe then, she wouldn’t have to cry as much.
Amy wasn’t really sure what to think when Sonic had called her and Shadow in a hoarse voice and asked them to meet up with him.
She wasn’t sure what to think when she came, Shadow ahead of her, and saw his swollen eyes and tear-stricken fur.
(She wasn’t sure what to think when he told them why.)
Amy can admit to herself that she wasn’t really sure if she believed him at first. It felt wrong to even admit it in the privateness of her psyche, but it’s what her initial reaction was.
She doesn’t think Shadow really believed him either. She remembered seeing a touch of anger, almost animosity in his glare, but he schooled it just as quickly and listened to Sonic.
She doesn’t think either of them believed Sonic, up until he dragged Metal Sonic to them himself.
There wasn’t a time where she saw Metal and Sonic in the same area and they weren’t fighting. Metal was aggressive, vicious in his hatred towards Sonic, and he needed an outside source to tell him to knock it off.
There was no outside source.
Instead, she watched as Sonic dragged him across the ground- so similar to the one time she did a lifetime ago, when Eggman left him and she dragged him all the way back with a bow and flower- his eyes just as empty as they were back then.
Up until they landed on her and Shadow and Sonic leaned in close and whispered something she couldn’t hear.
Metal jolted upwards, his eyes dancing across the two of them, claws digging into the ground as he crouched, looking like a scared animal. He let out a garbled scream, a screech of high-pitched wails, before he tried activating his jets and Sonic punched him in the head.
(She believed him then.)
Sonic and him had a fight. More like a yelling match, and she had to hold Sonic back as Shadow grabbed Metal and wrangled him to the ground.
“You don’t get to dump all that on me and try to run away!” Sonic snapped, shoving back against her, trying to free himself. “YOU DON’T GET TO SAY WHAT YOU SAID AND PRETEND IT DIDN’T HAPPEN!”
Shadow pulled Metal away, wrestled the robot that was trying to scratch him up and managed to pull him away from them. She thinks they talked about something, she didn’t know what, but Metal left after that.
(There was a lot of screaming, from all of them. A lot of demands and accusations, she was so scared, and a whole lot of blaming.)
This is the second meetup.
Amy shifted in her spot, sneaking a look at Shadow. He’s staring into the spot Sonic should be bringing Metal from, his arms crossed tightly against his chest.
“Are you okay?” she asked, watching as Shadow flinched at her voice. He relaxed just as quickly and huffed, shrugging.
“I’m still not sure how I feel about any of this,” he said, staring at the ground. “I’ve had time, but I’m still unsure of how I’m supposed to feel.”
“…You’re not alone,” she whispered, standing closer to him. “…What are we supposed to do?”
“Be there for him. Like Sonic asked us to be.”
“Is that enough?” she had spent nights awake, tossing and turning- because Sonic fought Metal when they met when he kidnapped her; what happened to her counterpart what happened to him? - and shuddered, rubbing her arm. “It feels… wrong not to do more.”
“There is nothing else we can do for him,” Shadow said, but he didn’t look happy about it. “The most we can do is make sure he’s not alone.”
Sonic didn’t like being alone, floated across her thoughts and Shadow turned to her with a glare.
“He’s not Sonic.”
“How did you know that what’s I was thinking.”
“It’s all over your face,” Shadow said, flicking her nose. “He’s not Sonic.”
“Wouldn’t he want to be addressed as Sonic? Shadow, he’s not Metal, shouldn’t we address him with his real name-?”
“We don’t know that,” he snapped, growling. “We don’t know anything. But we know he hates Sonic-”
“Because he says he’s the real Sonic!”
“He hasn’t done that in years! And-”
Shadow stopped, his ears perking up. And one moment later, Amy heard it too.
The sound of footsteps, and the slow movement of metal being dragged across the ground.
They looked at each other for a moment, before walking towards the sound.
(They can discuss this later.)
“We are apparently just doing this every time,” Sonic said when they approached, dropping Metal’s leg and letting it fall with a heavy thunk! “Like, c’mon dude, we talked about this.”
Metal didn’t move from his spot on the ground, even when his eyes flickered to look at her when she approached him.
“Hello,” she said, crouching down. “How are you today?”
Metal’s eyes left hers, staring at something in the sky.
“Amy and I were discussing something before you both arrived,” Shadow said, standing besides her. “What would you like us to address you as?”
Metal actually moved at that, tilting his head as Shadow reached out to him. After a long moment, Metal grabbed Shadow’s hands and allowed himself to be pulled to a sitting position.
Sonic grunted at that, tapping his foot. Amy elbowed him, placing a finger on her lips.
Metal simply pointed at himself, then his mouth, shaking his head.
“Right, right,” Sonic grabbed his phone and flipped it towards Metal, who caught it single handedly. Metal unlocked it- when he got the password she didn’t know- before typing something, lifting the phone up.
‘METAL’
“Alright,” Shadow said with a nod, a twinge of hurt flashing across his face. “Just Metal?”
Metal nodded, and Shadow hummed.
“Hello Metal,” he said. “I hope we can foster a closer relationship than what we had.”
Metal shrugged, glancing at the ground. Sonic dashed to him, crouching down and offering his hand. Metal didn’t take it this time, his hands tightening around his knees as Sonic stood back up.
“So what do you feel like doing today?” he asked, before he started pacing. “Maybe we can play a game? Or we can- you like building stuff right? Maybe we can talk to Tails-”
Metal slammed his fists on the ground, making her jump back. His eyes seemed to bore through Sonic, red pinpricks burning through Sonic’s skull, and Amy was relieved that those eyes weren’t on her.
“Alright alright alright!” Sonic said, shaking his hands in front of him. “Sorry, sorry. Won’t mention him again.”
Metal stared, his arms shaking, before he pulled his legs up and buried his head into his knees. Sonic sighed, falling to sit next to him, and hesitantly placed his hand on the back of Metal’s engine.
“I’m really sorry Metal,” he whispered. “Maybe… maybe we can still play a game? We gotta do something right?”
…What game could they even play out here?
(How often does this Sonic get to make choices?)
“Or-or we could watch a movie?” she suggested with a smile, trying to keep his options open. “Oh I know Omega likes to have his shell polished- don’t, don’t tell him I said that uh… maybe we can do that for you?”
“I can bring you some books and some blankets Metal,” Shadow said, nodding. “We can just relax for awhile.”
“Or maybe even a race,” Sonic said, smiling. “It’s been awhile since we’ve had one of those, and we don’t even need to ruin it with a fight! Let’s just have fun!”
Metal wasn’t looking at any of them anymore. He was twisting his foot as Amy moved closer, placing a hand on his arm. When he didn’t flinch away, when he didn’t move, she moved her fingers down his arm and clasped his hand in her own, sitting down next to him. One moment later, Sonic tapped his right arm before mirroring her action, his gloved fingers intertwining with Metal’s claws.
“Please Metal?” he asked, leaning in close. “I want you to make this decision. Please choose something at least, then you can go home?”
“Let us be here for you now Metal,” she said, before nervously swallowing. “We’re not friends yet, but I would like to be.”
Shadow nodded, stepping closer, and Metal straightened his back, before using his head to point at Sonic. Sonic lit up, releasing Metal in favour of lifting a finger, then two.
“Game or race?”
Metal lifted two fingers and Sonic nodded, clapping. “Alright, you, me and Shadow- can Shadow race us?” Metal shrugged, so Sonic nodded. “Alright so you, me, Shadow. Race. To the coastline and back! Amy can be the referee!”
She scoffed, moving towards Sonic to playfully point at his chest. “Oh I have to sit on the side? Really? Sonic I had no idea you were so heartless.”
“Oh but my dear Amy,” Sonic was throwing the theatrics just as hard as she was (because maybe Sonic wanted Metal to laugh as much as she did). “Someone needs to be able to say the results and alas for your poor, unfortunate legs, you do not possess that speed. You can hit twice as hard as I ever will.”
She smiled, summoning her hammer and laying it over her shoulder. “And don’t you forget it!”
“Oh I won’t!” Sonic said with a fake, peppy voice. “Trust me.”
She poked him with the haft, ignoring his guffaw of fake pain as she turned to Metal. “You ready to beat them Metal?”
He was staring at her, his hands clenched into fists. She faltered a little, frowning, reaching out to him-
Before he turned away from her, taking three steps forward and pausing, swiveling his head to look back at her.
Like nothing was wrong.
(How long was he forced to pretend nothing was wrong?)
Sonic was at his side in an instant, the biggest, fakest grin on his face. Shadow moved to Metal’s other side, his frown growing more pronounced, but he stared straight ahead, ready to start the race.
She moved in front of them, making sure there was a large enough berth as Sonic and Shadow crouched into position. Metal was staring at his right foot again, twisting it before he stomped hard on it and looked up at her.
He didn’t need to run.
Amy swallowed her anger, the disgust crawling up her throat and masked it with a wide smile- she wasn’t here to be the therapist Metal clearly didn’t want nor would she ever, ever be certified enough to help him with anything- and raised her arm.
(Because at the very least, she can make this version of her friend happy again.)
She thrust her arm down, feeling her dress and fur whip to the side as they began the race. She looked up to see a blur of blue and black fading away from the scenery leaving her…
With Metal.
Who was still standing there.
Sonic was back in an instant, abruptly coming to a stop next to her as she approached Metal. Metal’s arms snapped up to the side and Sonic jolted, grabbing her arm-
Before Metal leaned backwards and fell with a heavy thunk, Sonic’s phone dropping next to him.
“…Metal?” she called, walking closer to him. “I-I’m sorry, did you not want to race?”
He tilted his head towards the phone just as Shadow returned, who immediately moved to kneel next to Metal and touch his forehead, whispering something to him. Metal shook his head before whining- a high pitched scratchy sound that sent a shiver down her spine.
Amy walked towards Sonic’s phone, lifting it and reading the screen-
Before immediately wishing she hadn’t.
‘I made my decision. That was all that was asked of me.’
“So you didn’t want to actually race?” she asked, pointing at the phone. “You were just trying to-to appease us? Why?”
(He must’ve typed that when she and Sonic were trying to make him laugh- was he not listening?)
Metal’s eyes landed on hers and he reached a hand out, and she placed the phone back in his claws. He typed something down for a moment before lifting the phone back to her, but before she could grab it the phone disappeared from his grasp.
And Sonic snarled.
“No, no, you can’t-” Sonic shook his head as he stared at the screen, a small smile growing on his face. “You can’t do this to me buddy. We talked about this.”
Metal let out another whine, pointing at the phone, before pointing at Shadow, then her. And Sonic hurled the phone back at Metal, watching as Metal easily caught it again, a shattering sound as he squeezed the screen too hard.
“No,” Sonic said, growling in finality. “Amy and Shadow are not here to kill you. No one is here to kill you. You are not going to die. You are not allowed to die. I don’t care what you think is for the best, or you think your life is pointless now. You lost that right when you told me who you were. What was the point in telling me-”
And Sonic laughed, a long, deranged laugh, one so unlike himself. Shadow was crouching over Metal now, an arm laying atop him as Sonic collapsed to the ground, his fingers digging into the quills on his head.
“Why’d you have to go and tell me if you didn’t want me to help you?” he asked, looking up at Metal, his eyes growing mistier. “I don’t get it, I don’t get it, I don’t know what you want from me Metal. I don’t… I don’t know what to do. But no one’s going to kill you. I’m promising you that right now.”
Amy turned to Shadow, who was staring at Sonic in visible shock.
Metal wanted her to kill him.
Sonic wanted her to kill him-
She took one step back, taking a quick breath in, covering her mouth with her hand.
She was right.
(She wasn’t ready for this.)
Metal simply turned his head away from all of them, flipping his body to face the ground, and didn’t move until Sonic said he could leave.
There was something wrong with big bro.
…And my, that sentence would’ve meant so much more a month ago.
Orbot watched as Metal stared at his feet, flexing them with his claws, making odd little grunting noises. He watched as his feet finally responded, making an odd jerking movement, before he laid them flat again. He banged his head against the back of the wall, falling silent.
Orbot took that as the most welcome he’s going to get, and carried the PS5 into the room with him.
Metal didn’t say anything as Orbot set everything up, connecting everything and booting the PS5 up.
“This would be easier if you had a bigger TV screen,” Orbot mumbled, but joined Metal against the wall and sat down next to him. “The Wukong game you were interested in arrived.”
Metal didn’t move.
“I wish you wouldn’t do that when you want to ignore us,” Orbot said, lifting the controller to Metal. “Just… just tell me to shut up or I won’t.”
Metal didn’t move.
“Are you okay?” and before Metal could ignore him again, he quickly added. “Not mentally. Are you physically okay?”
That got Metal’s attention, at least a little, because he looked down at his feet.
“Something’s wrong with them right?” Metal shrugged, which is honestly a lot more than Orbot expected. “Do you want to hold my hand?”
(Mobians hands are particularly sensitive, so you will rarely see one without their gloves on.)
“Rephrase: I want to hold your hand and watch you play this video game, which is the only thing that has excited you recently,” Orbot said before letting his head fall onto his big brother’s knee. “I know you’re still… hurt Metal. But right now, I want you to do something that’ll make you happy. Or at the very least distract you.”
Metal shook his head and pointed at the door, then at himself, before banging his head hard against the back of the wall.
Leave.
Could be referencing the premises, Eggman, Orbot himself, this world.
“But if you leave, you won’t be able to play your game,” Orbot said, letting the many articles flow through his processors. “If you leave, who’s going to get a World Record by cheating and watching people go nuts trying to figure out if you’re legit?”
He held the remote controller to his brother, watching as his red eyes dropped to stare at it.
“You can’t do that if you leave, so that must mean you’re sticking around a little bit longer, right?”
He waited, because the reading told him he needed to be patient.
He waited, even as his hand shook, Metal’s eyes staring right through him.
(He waited, up until Metal took the controller from his hands and he tried his best not to slump in relief.)
“One day at a time Metal,” he said, leaning and getting comfortable against his brother. “One day at a time.”
He wasn’t sure who he was saying it too, but Metal still started the game after staring the TV for a minute and thirty seconds longer than he would’ve liked.
Orbot: He played the game.
Me: That’s good! Make sure he plays everyday okay? Remember we need a schedule of some sort
Me: @Sage? How’s it going on your part?
Sage: I have had extra work assigned his way without Father’s knowledge.
Me: Challenging stuff?
Sage: Challenging enough to hold up as a proper distraction, yes. But still well within his abilities to complete it.
Me: That’s great! Thank you!
Cubot: Sonic, is what we’re doing enough?
Sage: Yes that is something I would also like to discuss.
Sage: We’re not doing anything beneficial for my brother. He hasn’t spoken to anyone since it happened.
Me: Look.
Me: We need to take this slow alright? He’s not going to be fixed in one day
Cubot: One day at a time?
Me: That’s the plan little bud.
Orbot: …Alright.
Shadow wasn’t afraid of many things.
If anyone asked, he was insistent that he wasn’t scared of anything.
But…
As he started at the back of Metal Sonic’s head, watching as Amy and Sonic forced him to at least sit upright- something about Metal not responding to anything Sonic did- he thinks he wasn’t alone when he said he was a little scared.
(Because so many things don’t make sense, so many pieces just weren’t connecting. Why would Metal Sonic return to his captor, why would he follow Eggman so loyally, why would Eggman keep Metal afterwards, why-)
It reminded Shadow a little bit of his relationship with Gerald Robotnik.
Maybe that’s why this was bothering him so much.
And not… everything else.
(He didn’t know Metal didn’t like being called ‘Metal Sonic’. He didn’t know that Metal was maybe trying to shed a little bit of that identity with Neo.
He didn’t know that this one favour for Sonic would make him feel so many things and he didn’t know he would still not know how to identify any of them.
…He didn’t know how to feel knowing Metal was a ten-year-old version of Sonic that might have lived longer than any of them.
He didn’t know how to feel when he thought about how Metal never really grew up.)
“Metal…” Sonic said, tapping the robot’s- Mobian’s- visors, sighing. “C’mon. Up and at ‘em. I know you’re not asleep or knocked out or whatever it is you’re pretending to do.”
Metal was doing a wonderful job of not acknowledging or even listening to Sonic, and something unnerved him about how still Metal was.
Because it shouldn’t bother him.
(Except. It really, really was.)
“Metal?” Amy tried this time, tracing the metal curve of his spines. “May you please stand up? For me?”
And of course, Metal didn’t react. Because why would he, for someone like Amy?
Maybe that was the issue. Maybe Metal felt like they were being too familiar with him, when none of them knew him even remotely well enough to do that. Maybe he felt like an-an extension of Sonic with how they’re treating him right now.
A familiar face, twisted and corrupted, in a way that wasn’t just programming.
In a way that just screamed abuse.
(And Shadow knew abuse, down to the very core of his being. He knew how it felt to be poked and prodded and experimented on, all with the promise that he would be better-stronger later.
The idea of Sonic, stupid, non-serious, friendly, kind, crazy Sonic, enduring even a fraction of the pain of being experimented on?
He always said he was too fast for anyone trying to get him.
And Shadow finally had the answer to ‘but what if you weren’t?’)
He took a slow breath in before taking a step forward, watching as Amy’s glazed over eyes traced the line of Metal’s spines, over and over, as if this time, she would maybe feel the fur of her friend underneath.
But this wasn’t her friend.
(And if the timeline made enough sense, this was someone who barely knew her at all.)
But he knew Metal. Even if it was just a little bit. Even if it felt a little bit like betrayal to Omega, even if it was only when it was beneficial for both of them.
It was something.
That was better than everyone else.
“Metal?” he called, kneeling, looking into the obsidian that was the robot’s sclera. “Perhaps you would like to do nothing with us.”
He heard a choked sound, a whispered, “Shadow?” from Sonic, but it was easily ignored.
“I want to apologize,” he began, his eyes flickering to Amy’s fingers. “Clearly, we have been going too quickly. Your life story, something I assume you wanted to keep secret was shared with Amy and I without your consent, and I’m so sorry about that. I… understand what it’s like, having people you don’t really know look at you like an open book. It is… unnerving.”
Shadow waited after that, getting comfortable on the ground as Amy’s fingers froze. Even Sonic seemed to stand still behind him but he was wisely choosing to keep his mouth shut.
He was rewarded with Metal’s head slowly lifting up, his eyes blinking into existence after several long minutes.
“Hello Metal,” Shadow waved, hoping that this was working. “How have you been since we last met?”
Metal turned his head over to glance at Amy, before he tilted his head down, away from her. She seemed to get the message and jumped away from him, stuttering for a moment.
“Metal, Metal, I-I-I’m so sorry, I didn’t, I didn’t know you didn’t want to be- I’m so stupid I should’ve asked but I thought you liked it, I’m so sorry-”
He raised a hand to her lips, before raising his other hand towards Sonic.
Rouge always told him and Omega to stop throwing his phone around because he never remembered to replace the thing. But maybe if Omega would stop cracking it so often, the two of them could be doing whatever the hell Metal and Sonic were doing it so easily.
If you ignore Sonic’s cracked screen.
(That he has yet to replace.)
Metal unlocked Sonic’s phone again, before a robotic voice came out.
‘Only my hands,’ it said. ‘No where else.’
Amy swallowed, ringing her palms together as she nodded. “Got it. Got it, thank you. Thank you for not being mad, I, uh… may I ask why the hands? Specifically?”
Metal typed for a moment, before the voice continued.
‘Why are you helping me.’
Amy blinked as Metal’s gaze fell back on him and Shadow grunted under it. There was always something a little… off about Metal’s eyes, about the weight they held whenever they fell on him.
(It wasn’t that they felt too old for him.
It was just… they felt too heavy, as if there was a weight over them that Shadow could never interpret.)
“Because we want to help you,” Shadow said, making sure to keep his gaze steady. “Because you managed to scare Sonic with what you did, and now he wants to help you. And talking from experience, it’s a lot easier to just let him. Who knows? You might enjoy yourself.”
Metal’s eyes fell back to his feet before he began manually rotating the top portion of the left one- and he recalled that that might be called the forefoot- his eyes moving higher in his skull as his glared deepened. And before Shadow could ask about what he was doing, Metal’s claws dug into the forefoot and with a loud Riiiippp! pulled it off and threw it aside.
Before looking back at him like nothing was wrong.
Sonic and Amy let out a cry, both of them quickly demanding to know what that was about, but Metal simply planted his hands on the ground and pushed himself back up, allowing his weight to fall more on his right. Metal twisted his foot around, tasting his weight before he pulled out Sonic’s phone again.
‘What task did you want me to accomplish?’
And his heavy eyes returned to him, even while he was missing a foot. His eyes returned to him, his stance shifted- because it must heavy and wrong and why would he do that?!- and Metal stood up straight at attention staring at him, awaiting instructions.
From him.
(“I’ll be fine Maria,” he would always whisper whenever she dragged him away from his place in the tube and into her bed, her warmth always a balm against the agony of whatever test they had been working on. “I promise.”
And she would look at him, and that first time they were tears in her eyes, because he had dug into the fur on his head and yanked until everything else stopped hurting.
“You’re lying,” she always repeated, a script they were doomed to repeat; one that flip-flopped between them both. “Everyone else lies to me Shadow, please don’t join them.”)
But he knew Metal. Even if it was just a little bit. Even if it felt a little bit like betrayal to Omega, even if it was only when it was beneficial for both of them.
It was something.
That was better than everyone else.
Shadow looked up at the robot- the child- in front of him, the one who had listened to him that first day and calmed down, the one who Shadow had thought was comfortable with him, and admitted to the depths of his soul he was afraid.
(Because in what universe would a Sonic be standing in front of him, ready for instructions?)
Cubot: WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS FEET?
Me: what do you mean feet
Orbot: Sonic, he came back missing the forefoot of both his feet.
Me: HE ONLY YANKED ONE OF THEM OFF???
Sage: What. Do you mean. He yanked one of them off.
Me: I don’t know! Get him repaired??
Sage: He. Refuses everything Sonic.
Me: i don’t know what u want from me rn
Sage: Keep him in one piece.
Me: You keep him in one piece. I’ll make sure he doesn’t lose anymore.
“He’s made out of a lot of titanium.”
Amy glanced up at Sonic, watching as his eyes scrunched over the blueprints spread out across the table. They were in a library today and Metal was no where to been seen when Sonic approached them with a red folder. Instead, he asked if they could just… talk about their thoughts now that they got to see what they were working with, and check if they still wanted to keep helping.
And he brought Metal’s blueprints.
(The fact Metal even had those opened a pit deep in her stomach, threatening to swallow her whole.)
“Yes he is,” Shadow said, even though his eyes barely strayed away from all the detailed layouts in front of him, only flickering up to take a glance around them before falling again. “So are a lot of the Doctor’s machines.”
“But he’s also hollow too, look,” Sonic lifted a piece with Metal’s head on it, tilting it so she could get a better look. From the detailed drawing of his face she could see all the arrows pointed behind it, see all the wires and panels and pipes that made up Metal Sonic’s brain. “Does that help him? Titanium is really heavy but he can still keep up with me. I bet he would be able to keep up with me longer if he stopped trying to lop my head off whenever the opportunity arises.”
“Omega is capable of- not keeping up with you necessarily but he can go remarkably fast. Much faster than humans,” Shadow scoffed, before pointing at the sheet detailing Metal’s engine. “It all comes down to this and his overall shape. Being aerodynamic and what not.”
Sonic’s frown grew darker as he held up the sheet with the engine, glaring it down before tossing it aside. “Well he is heavy.”
“Is that really the big lesson you learned after dragging him around? Would you like me to pity you?”
Shadow easily caught the pencil Sonic threw at him and Amy had to resist the urge to sigh at their bickering. They had more important things to worry about.
“Why are you so caught up with the engine Sonic?” she asked, placing a hand on his shoulder. It took a moment for him to look back at her, before he slumped down.
“Did you ever think about how hard it would be to control an engine going that fast?”
She blinked, before tilting her head. “…No?”
“Well I have,” he mumbled, picking up the paper detailing Metal’s legs. “And I think it would be hard.”
“On what basis are you getting this off of?” Shadow said, raising an eyebrow. “You don’t have an engine in your chest. And once again, Omega does it fine enough.”
“Yeah well Omega isn’t Metal.”
“Well obviously he isn’t. Omega is actually a Badnik.”
Sonic inhaled sharply at that, sitting upright abruptly. Amy shot Shadow a glare before placing both hands on Sonic’s shoulder, pulling him in for a little half hug. Sonic pressed closer into her for half a second, breathing out his tension, before sitting back up.
“He’s not like Omega,” Sonic said, jabbing the table with every word. “Because Omega doesn’t have one engine.”
Shadow opened his mouth before closing it again, then motioned for Sonic to continue.
“Omega’s got two engines right?” with Shadow’s nod, Sonic continued. “And they’re like. Attached to this panel thing so he can turn easily right.”
“Right.”
“Metal’s got one,” he said, lifting a finger. “To turn, he has to rotate his chest cavity to the side he needs to get to. But he’s only got one. He doesn’t have anything to like. Counter the speed he’s going at. You need a little warmup before you can go super fast, but I don’t. I think Metal also needs that warm up time, but regardless, you adjust your feet in anticipation of when you turn, like, like this.”
Sonic stood up and went to the side of the table, planting his feet on the ground. “So when I’m going super fast, all I gotta do is plant this leg quickly and turn-” he turned, pushing off the ground with one foot. “-and then I’m back in the game right?”
“…Right.”
“Metal can’t do that. He’s… he’s got one engine and he can go so much faster than Omega can. Eventually. But point is he can go faster, but that makes it harder for him to turn, because how are you supposed to turn the engine at that speed.”
Amy bit her lip and swallowed, looking back down at the blueprints.
The pictures that stared back at her felt haunting, like she was looking at a familiar face that wasn’t.
(She remembers, a long time ago, asking Sonic how he was able to avoid the government for as long as he did when she busted him out of jail, back when they first met Shadow.
And she remembered he laughed, joking about how he had let them get him, that he was too fast for anyone to hold him down.
Years later, she remembered Charmy asking him if any government agent or scientist ever asked why Sonic can run faster than Mobian, if anyone ever tried to find out why he can break the sound barrier. It was an innocent enough question, and she remembered Vector scolding him for asking in the first place.
But the part she remembered the most was Sonic’s smile as he whapped Vector on the arm, reassuring him that Charmy was fine, before asking Charmy if he really thinks the government would be able to hold him down long enough to figure out.
Did Metal’s Eggman figure it out? Was there actually a reason Sonic could run as fast as he could, but he was never able to replicate it?)
“He’s heavy,” Sonic emphasized, gesturing to his chest area. “Heavier things are harder to slow down right? He might be aerodynamic and built to go that fast, but he’s hollow, which means when his plating falls off- which it might at the speeds he’s going- giant heavy pieces of metal can fall off him, and I don’t think he can turn properly. At least not anywhere that’s not forwards or backwards. And he’s not like Omega, because Omega actually cares about his body to some degree. He can’t be blasting badniks if he messes up dashing to them.”
Shadow wasn’t looking at Sonic anymore. Shadow was looking at the blueprints, his face pulled, like he tasted something sour he didn’t like.
Amy didn’t even want to think about how she looked.
“What are we supposed to do about that Sonic?” she asked, letting her hands bundle up her dress as she squeezed. “What- how are we supposed to help with that?”
And Sonic turned to her- and he looked so tired- before he sighed, letting a hand run through one of his quills. “I don’t- I don’t know. I just… noticed it I guess.”
Amy watched as Sonic tilted back in his chair and idly rubbed his chest, and she watched the way his fur moved back and forth with his hands.
(And she thought about how Metal would never get that opportunity.)
“Are you alright?” she asked, because she could see the bags under his eyes and the slight tremor in his hands, and she knew he wasn’t, but it felt right to ask.
He swallowed, his throat bobbing for a moment, before he nodded.
“Could be worse,” he mumbled and she didn’t know how to respond to that.
Because he could be.
He could be Metal right now, all alone.
“…Why did you ask us for help?”
She glanced up at Shadow- and he was staring at them, free from all the anger and hostility from before. He was clenching one of the blueprints in his hands, the one detailing how Metal’s feet worked, and she immediately understood.
(Watching Metal Sonic hobble around, shoving Sonic away from him as Sonic tried to hep him walk, hurt something deep within her soul.)
“I don’t think I’m being very helpful,” she whispered, shaking her head. “I-I don’t, I don’t know how to help him.”
“I-I know Amy. I promise I know. But you’re doing great, I swear.”
“Are we?” Shadow asked, his voice a harsh whisper. “Because all we learned for essentially the past month is Metal Sonic is an abused child who returned to his abuser- for some reason- chose to hate you on sight- for some reason- and can never be organic again, for some reason.”
“That last ‘some reason’ is because Eggman ditched the original body he came into this timeline with.”
“Then shouldn’t he be dead?” she asked, rubbing her eyes. “I don’t understand how he’s still alive, how Eggman rebuilt him and he’s still you.”
“And another thing,” Shadow said, pointing at her. “How old is he? How long has this been going on?”
“I told you like the day after I found out-”
“Not that part,” Shadow snapped, before taking a quivering breath in. “Not that part,” he said, calmer. “I’m talking about how old Metal Sonic is right now, if the incident at Little Planet happened when you were ten.”
Sonic looked at Shadow incredulously, shrugging.
“You didn’t think to ask that?!”
“Why does that matter?”
“It does matter Sonic,” she said, immediately looking around to make sure she hasn’t attracted any attention. “It matters so much, is he an adult?”
Sonic raised an eyebrow at her, shaking his head slowly. “Look at Metal and tell me that’s an adult.”
…Okay fair.
“So is he your age then?” Shadow asked, making a rolling motion with his hands. “Because that doesn’t make sense either, that would mean he immediately ditched the Eggman of that dimension and decided this one was better somehow?”
“No I don’t- I don’t know, I didn’t ask, I didn’t- why are you both so caught up on his age?! He’s ten.”
“No he’s not!” she said, grabbing her quills. “He’s not- why do you think he’s ten?!”
“That’s how old I was when this whole thing happened-!”
“But you’re sixteen! He might be seventeen or eighteen or maybe even older-"
She was cut off when Shadow shushed them both, his eyes darting around. Amy exhaled slowly, drawing herself back up and turning away from both of them, just focusing on her breathing.
(They were so lucky to be alone right now, because she has a feelings any passerbyers would have so many questions.)
Metal doesn’t act like an adult.
But doesn’t that just make everything worse?
“I didn’t ask him,” Sonic whispered, gathering the blueprints and putting them back in the red folder he brought them in. “I didn’t ask too many questions.”
“Why?” she asked. “Wouldn’t more questions be the normal reaction?”
Sonic stared at the folder, fidgeting with the ends of it. When he stayed quiet for too long, when she could feel the seconds tick by, a sudden chill came over her, freezing her in place.
It was normal to take some time to think about a response.
It was normal to think over your words, especially when they were discussing something so difficult.
It was normal.
(Then why did she see Metal, who stared at Shadow as he demanded to know why Metal wanted instructions from him of all people, and just stared until Shadow walked away.)
But then Sonic began chuckling, the sound building up from quiet whispers in the air before becoming loud, laughter that would absolutely get them kicked out.
Her and Shadow stared at each other, before Shadow stood up and moved next to Sonic, shushing him.
Sonic kept giggling, like the sound was comforting, snickering as his shoulders shook.
“You-you think…” he trailed off breathlessly, sighing. “You think I would have a normal reaction? My robot rival turned out to be a maybe dead version of me embodying one of my worse fears, is actively hurting himself, has barely been around since the Neo incident, and you expect me to have a normal reaction?”
His chuckles died down as he covered his face with his hand, sighing as he slumped down. His hand dragged across his face to reveal a tired smile, before his arm dropped against his side with a plump.
“My evil robot copy who despises me came up to me randomly for a fight,” he whispered, staring at the ceiling lights. “And I ended with the realization that he wasn’t there to win. I ended with the realization that he is, maybe was, alive, and he was stuck as the me when I was little. Does it matter how old he is? I used to be a selective mute for years, and here’s a version of me that was never allowed to grow up. I love making jokes and talking, and here’s a version that was barely allowed to have a voice. I love running around, doing my own thing, and here’s a version of me that isn’t allowed to. I have so many friends and I hope to make so many more, and here’s a version of me that has none. Orbot and Cubot are his brothers, did you know that? It’s- it’s so dumb the things I’m getting caught up on, but those two being his brothers is killing me.”
Amy didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how to comfort him. Sonic usually liked hugs and small touches, finding those to be more grounding than anything else, but maybe those wouldn’t be appreciated right now?
She could ask.
(She should’ve asked Metal, but she didn’t. She assumed she knew him.
But. She didn’t.)
Amy tapped his shoulder and when he glanced at her, she opened her arms for him. He looked at her open arms than at her, before his lips began wobbling and he fell against her, his arms wounding up tight around her.
“Sorry for calling you both,” he mumbled into her neck as Shadow sat down on his seat, leaning in close to hear him. “But he got real mad when I suggested Tails, and I know you were travelling around Amy and I’m so sorry-”
“Don’t apologize,” she said, digging her fingers into his quills the way she knows he likes it. “Please don’t apologize.”
“Sonic,” Shadow whispered, looking at the both of them. “I don’t mind the fact you asked for help. I’m sorry if I gave off that ideation. I just… don’t know how to help him.”
Sonic huffed amusingly, shifting so he was more lying on her shoulder than anything else, shooting Shadow a wary grin. “That makes the three of us.”
Shadow looked down at the space between them, silent as Amy scooched so Sonic had a little room to sit and try to burrow his way into her neck. No one was saying anything, no one was talking, she didn’t know what else she could do, she didn’t know how to help-
“I think I hate him.”
Amy needed to blink and think for a second, because the words that Sonic breathed, so quiet she almost didn’t heart it, wasn’t something she ever expected.
“What?” Shadow whispered, in quiet disbelief. “You think you hate Metal? Not the Doctor?”
Sonic looked away, his small, fake smile growing on his face. “Y’know, I think I’m starting to hate him too. I know he wasn’t the one who turned Metal into… Metal Sonic, but. But he knew. And… and I don’t think he really cares, even now.”
And Sonic shook his head quickly, tsking. “No my bad. He does care. He’s afraid of Metal.”
That… was also something she never expected to come out of Sonic’s mouth.
“You mentioned Orbot and Cubot being his brothers,” because she didn’t want to latch onto the fact Sonic hated Metal now, or the fact that he was hating Eggman. “Why does that upset you?”
(She didn’t know what was the right thing to latch onto. Not now.)
Sonic shook his head again, grabbing his quills and groaning loudly. “See this is why I think I hate him,” and that was not where she wanted this conversation to go, but she also doesn’t think she wants to have this conversation at all, so it would make sense that they’re back to this. “Who do I consider my family, one of which Metal wants nothing to do with?”
Well, Tails obviously. And Knuckles would never say it, but she knows he loves Sonic and Tails like brothers, protects them like family. If Metal had a Knuckles, he probably wouldn’t even be Metal, because Knuckles would die before letting something of this magnitude happen to Sonic. She remembers the many nights during the war her and Vector would take turns comforting Knuckles, because the guilt of what happened to Sonic used to eat him alive.
(She would visit Angel Island more often after, because she knew it still did, months later.)
Shadow suddenly swore, burying his head in his hands as he muttered more expletives under his breath.
No, focus, focus, she got distracted. Sonic considers Tails and maybe Knuckles his family, but what does that have to do with Orbot and Cubot.
Orbot and Cubot. Tails and Knuckles. Is there a parallel she’s missing beyond the duo thing? Shadow wouldn’t be that upset with just that and no way would Sonic be as hung up over this just because there are two of them.
Think, think. What are the similarities between them? All of them have completely different personalities and Tails and Knuckles have a different relationship than Orbot and Cubot probably, but what’s something dumb about them that would tear Sonic up?
Orbot and Cubot.
Tails and Knuckles.
Metal was a messed-up mirror of Sonic, which seems to be the part making him most upset, but how would that relate to Metal’s brothers?
Orbot and Cubot. Tails and Knuckles.
(Yellow and red.
A messed-up reflection, right up until the very end.)
…What a dumb thing to be conflicted about.
…What a dumb thing, and she feels conflicted about it.
(Eggman went to Angel Island after Sonic and Tails met her, and tricked Knuckles into working with him. What happened with the Knuckles there? Were they even friends?)
“I hate him,” Sonic whispered, moving to duck under her head so he could nuzzle it gently. “I hate how I have to think about all this now. I hate that I have to deal with this now. I hate that he told me this so I would kill him, and I hate that he’s not even trying to get better. You know what his siblings, Sage is his sister by the way, you know what they said?”
She shook her head, swallowing heavily. She doesn’t think she wants to know.
“He ripped off his other forefoot,” he hissed, clenching his hands and tapping his foot on the ground. “The other one and just the forefoot. I don’t get him. I don’t get why he did anything he did, and the most he’s talked to anyone is us. Eggman he- Metal put in a new voice box and Eggman took it out. He doesn’t get to talk, I’m not going to let him die, and he doesn't want to get better. I’m just so…” he trailed off, before tired green eyes met hers.
(Was it stupid, thinking about how Metal is the exact opposite of Sonic? Was it dumb, looking at Sonic’s eyes, and thinking about how the inverse of soft green and white would be piercing red and black? Was it wrong, half-holding Sonic, feeling his warmth and listening to every quiet breath he took, and thinking about the coolness of Metal’s skin- was that his skin?- and the hum behind his engine?
She didn’t know.
She didn’t know anything.)
“I don’t… know how I feel,” Sonic whispered. “But I know it’s a lot.”
She hummed, nuzzling him. He exhaled and she felt one of his arms wrap around her back and hold her closer, listening to his whispered, “Thank you.”
“…Do you want to help him Sonic?” Shadow asked, before lifting his hands in placation. “And I am not trying to offend you when I ask this, but were you hoping Amy and I would take over and you could leave?”
Sonic bolted upright, just barely missing knocking into her chin. He whispered a quick apology to her and she waved him off, before he turned to Shadow.
“No,” he said, shaking his head. “I mean- no I wouldn’t leave you and Amy to this alone, this is insane. I wanna help him I promise!”
Shadow leaned back a little, watching Sonic with a careful eye. “Out of obligation because he came to you? Or because you see a reflection of yourself in him?”
“He-” Sonic cut himself off, his leg began bouncing again, moving so quick it was a blur. “He’s me.”
“He’s a version of you,” Shadow said with a steady gaze. “He is not you.”
“What’s the difference?”
“Your experiences,” Shadow explained. “Your memories. Your thoughts. Your priorities. You. He used to be you, but Metal hasn’t spewed that ‘real Sonic’ crap in years and I have seen him outside of battle since then. He doesn’t… I don’t believe that is his priority anymore.”
“He wanted to be called Metal,” she piped up. “Not Sonic, not Metal Sonic, just Metal.”
“We can determine whether or not he actually likes that name at a later time. And I am happy that you trust Amy and I with this. But as last time clearly showed, he doesn’t know how to make his own decisions.”
“He made his own decisions with Neo,” Sonic muttered, holding his leg and standing up. “Sorry Amy.”
“No problem, Sonic. Ever. And…” and she thought back to the nights of thinking, reviewing everything she thought she knew about Metal. “Becoming Neo was his own decision, I’m not saying that, but was the rest of it really his? I mean, he hates you- we all know that, but maybe that hatred is from Eggman?”
“Or it could be the worse portrayal of self-hatred I’ve ever seen.”
Sonic choked on Shadow’s words, before he genuinely began laughing. Amy slapped Shadow’s arm, trying to keep her own smile from her own face because holy-
“That’s messed up man, oh my god,” Sonic walked away, covering his face. “Great, now I’m thinking if Metal actually hates me or is projecting too hard, and which one I prefer.”
She did snort at that, watching as Shadow huffed amusingly, crossing his arms across his chest.
What a messed-up thing to find funny.
(But this is a pretty messed up situation and this is how she’s choosing to cope.)
“…I need a better plan at going about this whole thing, don’t I?” Sonic wasn’t looking at either of them, just at the bookshelf, but she hummed in affirmation.
“He doesn’t know how to make his own decisions.”
“And he doesn’t really seem to want to either,” she added, Shadow nodding at her. “So maybe we should organize some things?”
Sonic inhaled and exhaled, turning to them. And the fur on his chest was mussed up and he had begun rubbing it again, and he still looked so tired, but there was a spark of hope in his eyes that’s been absent for nearly a month now, and Amy couldn’t help but smile at him.
“One day at a time?” she asked, looking at them both.
Shadow snorted, getting up. “Only way we can go about this world.”
“Of course you’d say that,” Sonic said, but his smile was genuine and he seemed relaxed. “…Thank you. Both of you.”
And when she smiled back it felt real.
(Because she didn’t know how to help him. Help Metal.
And she doesn’t think she wants to know all the details of what happened with him. How Metal told Sonic about this at all.
But maybe, with these two, she can help.
Distract him.
That seemed easy enough.)
Sage: Metal Sonic has chosen to hide away for hours and he’s replaced his left foot entirely.
Me: U literally had one job.
Sage: You were supposed to have taken him out!
Me: and u were supposed to make sure he doesn’t lose more parts so who’s the disappointment here?
Sage: ...Rude.
Me: idk Sage. Find out why he's doing that?
Sage: I will accomplish this task to the best of my ability.
Sage: Sonic? Your usual response after mines was not delivered. Is everything alright?
Me: ...im fine Sage. Just... thinking.
Me: is everything a task to u?
Sage: Yes. That is how we accomplish things.
Me: alright. thank you again.
Sage: My deepest pleasure.