Work Text:
Nie Huaisang stared out the lattice window in a daze. At night, Lotus Pier was quiet, save for the gentle chirping of insects hidden amongst its thick foliage. The air was cool, but not too chilly that one needed to bundle up with a warm blanket. Though the reason he had come here was solely for political purposes, Nie Huaisang enjoyed this place—sometimes he felt he enjoyed it more than the Unclean Realm.
After the recent cultivation conference’s conclusion, he had jokingly told Jiang Cheng that he’d rather stay in Lotus Pier than return to Qinghe. Surprisingly, the other sect leader had not snarked at him to cease his idiotic remarks and to hurry up and return to his own sect already. No, instead, Jiang Cheng had simply raised a thin eyebrow and told Nie Huaisang he could ‘do as he pleased’, before sweeping away to do whatever it was Jiang Chengs did everyday.
And so Nie Huaisang stayed in Lotus Pier.
He spent his time watching the silly games the Yunmeng Jiang Sect junior disciples played, drawing up the occasional painting, enjoying the calming atmosphere with a plate of peeled lotus seeds, and bothering Sect Leader Jiang as often as he could.
However, the issue—because there was always an issue—was that despite the pleasant change of scenery Sect Leader Jiang’s estate afforded him, Nie Huaisang was not properly sleeping at night. And if he did sleep, his dreams were always less than pleasant.
This had been an ongoing issue for quite some time now. When he’d first stepped onto the docks before the cultivation conference had commenced, Nie Huaisang had breathed in the crisp air that smelled of lotuses and foolishly believed he could be cured just by being in this relaxing environment.
He was sadly mistaken.
The makeup he used to conceal the dark circles that had taken permanent residence beneath his eyes was still sorely needed. The alcohol he drank in the evenings to dull his senses became a habitual necessity he could no longer do without.
As the days went on, Jiang Cheng seemed to have noticed Nie Huaisang’s worsening countenance, idly remarking that he ought to sleep with the window open to let in the fresh air at night.
Night after night, Nie Huaisang laid in his borrowed bed inside his borrowed rooms and gazed mindlessly at the fireflies that floated outside his open window. Even if the man’s suggestion did little to help, it was nice to know that Jiang Cheng cared enough to voice his suggestions.
><><><
“You are looking better this evening,” Jiang Cheng commented after taking his seat in the dining hall.
Nie Huaisang hummed in acknowledgement, accepting a cup of wine from a nearby servant. “The sleeping tonics you’ve been ordering your staff to discreetly mix into my drinks have been helping somewhat.”
Jiang Cheng raised a calculating eyebrow at him. “If you knew, then why did you keep silent about it?”
“I saw no immediate harm in going along with your schemes, and I am not averse to sleeping throughout the night undisturbed,” he said simply.
The master of Lotus Pier huffed irritably before taking up his chopsticks and placing several portions of food from his bowl into Nie Huaisang’s.
“You should eat more,” was all he said in explanation.
Nie Huaisang had no appetite—hasn’t had one for years—but for Jiang Cheng, he consumed the entire meal.
><><><
Though the decoctions made by Jiang Cheng’s medicine makers had initially eased Nie Huaisang’s symptoms for a short time, its efficacy did not last quite as long as either man might have hoped.
“Your night terrors are worsening, aren’t they?”
Nie Huaisang’s hand paused mid-stroke as he dragged an ink brush across a sheet of rice paper.
He had not mentioned a word of his reoccurring nightmares to Jiang Cheng. Yet somehow, the man still seemed to know about them. It was possible that his servants had tipped him off after hearing subtle cries coming from the Qinghe Nie sect leader’s temporary rooms.
Jiang Cheng did not wait for his answer, calling a servant over with a raised hand. The servant kneeled down and presented a wooden lacquered box to their master, who took it into hand and passed it over to Nie Huaisang.
“Take it.”
Nie Huaisang momentarily set his painting brush aside and accepted the mysterious object from the other sect leader. At Jiang Cheng’s expectant look, he carefully opened the box and peered inside at its contents. His eyes were met with a silver bell engraved with the nine petaled lotus of the Yunmeng Jiang sect, a mauve tassel secured at its end. This was a clarity bell, a tool native to the Jiang Sect, used by its disciples to quell a mind in disarray. When Nie Huaisang took it into his hand and lightly shook it, it made no sound.
“This is…”
“It’s been modified with sleeping charms,” Jiang Cheng said. “Sleep with it underneath your pillow. It will help some.”
Nie Huaisang nodded his head with his lips tightly pursed, unable to even utter a reply of thanks.
><><><
Nie Huaisang placed the clarity bell Jiang Cheng had gifted him beneath his pillow every night. Whenever he rested his head against his pillow and shut his eyes, he felt his clouded mind begin to clear. The black tendrils of the horrid imagery that had been plaguing him for eons receded, leaving a bare yet comforting emptiness in its wake.
But just like with the sleeping tonics, it did not last for long.
Like a persistent cancer, the nightmares returned, this time more vivid and sickening than ever.
Nie Huaisang stood in Guanyin Temple, unsure of what he had just been doing.
"What are you still doing here?"
Startled, Nie Huaisang nearly tripped over his own feet as he snapped his head around to find Jiang Cheng standing at the temple's entrance, a sour look upon his handsome face.
"Sect Leader Jiang..."
"Well?" The other man prompted. "Are you coming or not?"
Nie Huaisang hesitated for a split second before he rushed over to Jiang Cheng's side. "Where are we going?"
"Somewhere else," Jiang Cheng answered impatiently. "Unless you want to stay in this desolate place all on your own?"
Nie Huaisang was quick to reply, "I don't. Not at all."
"Good. Then we're going." Jiang Cheng grasped him by the forearm and pulled him into a sudden embrace.
Nie Huaisang blinked as his face was pressed into the other sect leader's broad chest. Warmth flooded his cheeks as a tingling sensation skittered across his skin.
“J-Jiang—”
Just as he was about to question if the other man was feeling okay, something warm and wet fell onto Nie Huaisang's cheek. He lifted his arm and wiped at it with the palm of his hand, his eyes widening when he saw that it came away stained red. Alarmed, he looked up to Jiang Cheng.
What he saw was not Jiang Cheng, or no—it was Jiang Cheng. But it was a Jiang Cheng that Nie Huaisang never wanted to come face to face with.
“No…”
Nie Huaisang backed away in terror. "Not you...not you too..."
The living corpse with cloudy eyes spoke to him, "Huaisang. Why are you running away? Are you not still besotted with me? After all, you're always sticking to me like a persistent fly..."
Nie Huaisang brought a hand to his own cheek, hard. "Wake up!"
Jiang Cheng suddenly laughed, spraying blood outward with each puff of his chest. "Oh, I get it. Now that I'm like this, you don't love me anymore."
The words were out of Nie Huaisang's mouth before he could stop them, "I love you! I'll always love you!"
"Then come here."
Forcing his legs to move, Nie Huaisang came closer against his better judgement. This was a dream; in the back of his mind, he knew that. Yet it felt so real, and Jiang Cheng was right there, beckoning him.
A pale, veiny hand was outstretched towards him, waiting. Hesitantly, Nie Huaisang reached for it.
His smaller hand closed around Jiang Cheng's pale and veiny larger one. Nie Huaisang swallowed as he looked at it.
"Then, are we going?"
At Nie Huaisang's nod of confirmation, Jiang Cheng added, "Lead the way."
With the other sect leader's hand still in his, Nie Huaisang turned to head towards the exit. He took a few steps and quickly felt that something was not right. Looking over his shoulder, Jiang Cheng's hand was still tightly being held in his. It was only that the rest of his body was no longer attached to that hand.
Arms, legs, fingers, and toes were scattered about on the floor, all of them belonging to the Jiang sect leader-turned fierce corpse.
“No, no, no…!” Nie Huaisang cried out as he knelt down and scrambled with Jiang Cheng’s severed limbs, attempting to put the man back together as if he were some sort of demented puzzle. He reattached the finger that had Zidian on it, but it did not look right no matter how many times he adjusted its position, appearing crooked and stiff. His hands fumbled when he reached for Jiang Cheng's left shoulder, attempting to line the socket up with its respective arm. The results were disastrous.
Jiang Cheng’s head slid right off of his neck, rolling onto the floor and bumping into Nie Huaisang’s knee.
The subsequent scream that left Nie Huaisang's throat nearly shredded his vocal cords.
“Oh my.”
A familiar voice abruptly sounded out from behind him.
Turning his head, Nie Huaisang saw another man smiling in his direction. This man had a similar build to his, with a shorter stature and elegant face. Underneath his hat, his long hair was a tea leaf shade of brown that framed the vermillion mark between his eyebrows.
“A shame,” the man spoke. “It seems you’ve broken him, A-Sang.”
“Shut up!” Nie Huaisang whipped his head back to futilely continue piecing Jiang Cheng back together. He knew what he was doing—he had done it before. He could fix Jiang Cheng. Just like he fixed—
“You silly thing. There is no use,” Jin Guangyao said blithely.
Nie Huaisang swallowed the bile in his throat, resisting the urge to vomit.
“Everything you love—”
He reached for Sandu that was lying in the heap of Jiang Cheng’s scattered body parts and leapt to his feet. With a fierce cry, he swung the blade haphazardly towards the traitorous man that was taunting him. “Shut up!”
Sandu sliced cleanly through the air.
The spot where Jin Guangyao had been standing was empty.
“—is already gone.” The taunting voice echoed throughout the temple before fading away.
Holding back a sob, Nie Huaisang carelessly dropped Jiang Cheng’s weapon to the ground. When he turned back to continue his hopeless task of reattaching body parts, he could no longer suppress his wails.
Aside from Zidian, everything of Jiang Cheng had already disintegrated into dust.
Nie Huaisang’s bare feet rapidly pelted against the wooden flooring of Lotus Pier’s manor.
He hardly knew which way he was going, but managed to reach his destination by some stroke of luck.
Slamming his fists against a door that had notable ornamentation on its exterior, he cried out, “S-Sect Leader Jiang! Come out, I-I need to discuss something with you!”
The heart beneath his rib cage was beating right out of his chest, so painfully that he thought he may die. A moment later, he heard a muffled voice from the other side of the door. It sounded frustrated.
“Huaisang, do you have any idea what time it is? I’ve already retired for the night.”
Nie Huaisang knew he was being unreasonable—he did—but no matter what, he could not calm down until he saw Jiang Cheng in person.
“Please, I just need to see your face,” he begged, frantically tugging at the door. “Please! Jiang-xiong—”
The door opened suddenly, and Nie Huaisang nearly fell forward inside before he was caught and righted by Jiang Cheng, who was wearing a mauve set of inner robes with his hair tied into a loose braid.
The man was very much alive, with all of his body parts very much intact.
The look on Jiang Cheng’s face was severe, his sharp eyebrows furrowed and his eyes narrowed with a hint of concern lacing them.
“What is the matter with you?”
Those same narrowed eyes widened in shock when they landed on Nie Huaisang’s tear stricken face. A pair of slender hands came up to tenderly cup two chiselled cheeks.
“You’re alive,” Nie Huaisang breathed. “You’re just fine, aren’t you? He was lying to me.”
The other sect leader responded slowly. “…Why wouldn’t I be?”
Nie Huaisang shook his head. “I don’t know. I don’t know. I…”
Jiang Cheng was quiet for a heavy moment. Then he took Nie Huaisang’s hands away from his face and held them in his own. “It’s cold out here. Come inside.”
Nie Huaisang was led inside Jiang Cheng’s personal chambers, a place he had never before been in.
The other sect leader padded over to his bed and lifted the covers. “Go on,” he said. “Get in.”
For a moment Nie Huaisang thought his ears were playing tricks on him. It sounded like Jiang Cheng had just invited him into his bed.
“I did,” the man said testily. “Hurry up and get over here already.”
Jiang Cheng’s sharp voice caused Nie Huaisang to hastily scurry over, though his mind was still in the midst of processing this entire situation.
He climbed into the bed and laid on his back.
“On your stomach.”
Nie Huaisang did not question Jiang Cheng’s instructions, obediently doing as he said and turning his body over. He was in uncharted territory, and did not dare to step out of line. The bed lurched slightly as Jiang Cheng climbed onto it and laid next to him. What happened next made Nie Huaisang’s brain nearly stop working altogether. A large palm was smoothing itself up and down his back in a soothing manner.
“Close your eyes.”
Nie Huaisang forced himself to close his eyes. He never used to fear the dark, but ever since he'd exacted his revenge, the all consuming blackness seemed to unsettle him.
“Whatever you are seeing at night in your dreams—none of it is real.”
Jiang Cheng’s hand moved up towards Nie Huaisang’s neck, firmly squeezing at his nape. “This is real.”
Against his own will, Nie Huaisang's body began to shake. Why did Jiang Cheng's hand feel so good against his skin? Why did he suddenly feel that everything was alright and nothing could hurt him anymore?
"I did not experience a good night's sleep for over ten years after my parents died," Jiang Cheng murmured from above him. "Nothing helped. Not medicine, not clarity bells, not even picturing my nephew's infant face in my head."
Nie Huaisang parted his chapped lips. "I cannot bear it," he wept.
"Then do not," Jiang Cheng replied. "Give all of it to me, and I will bear it for you."
At this, Nie Huaisang could no longer resist shifting around to face Jiang Cheng properly. "Why? Why would you want to..."
He winced slightly as his cheek was lightly pinched between two calloused fingers.
"I'd hoped you'd have figured that part out already."
Jiang Cheng's expression was soft, softer than Nie Huaisang had ever seen it before.
"Huaisang. Go to sleep."
><><><
Jiang Cheng regarded Nie Huaisang's sleeping figure that was curled up against him in his bed. He ran his fingers through the smaller man's hair, sweeping his eyes over the heavy bags that marred Nie Huaisang's face. Despite these bags and dark circles, the Nie cultivator's expression was finally clear and without distress.
In the morning, he would have the servants prepare a warm bowl of congee for the other sect leader, and he would make sure Nie Huaisang ate all of it. He would allow this ridiculous man that he'd somehow fallen for to stay in Lotus Pier for as long as he needed. He had already decided—in that moment when Nie Huaisang had grasped each side of his face with tears in his eyes—that he would remain by this man's side in the way no one had been for him. He had no reason to other than that he simply wanted to.
Jiang Cheng leaned down to chastely press his lips against Nie Huaisang's forehead.
Everyone had their own demons, but that did not necessarily mean those demons must be fought alone.
