Chapter Text
It was 7°C out, but Charlie swore he could see hot steam billowing out of Tao’s ears.
“Breathe,” Charlie urged his flustered friend as the pair strode across the windy courtyard.
Tao grumbled through clenched teeth, burrowing his nose into his scarf like a disgruntled turtle. “Don’t tell me to breathe. I am fucking breathing.”
“Awww, c’mere!”
“Get OFF!.... Would you just…Uuuuuugh.” Tao could not help but chuckle as his ire was squeezed out of him by Charlie’s cheeky embrace. “I’m sorry,” Tao eventually sighed, throwing a long arm around the slighter boy’s shoulders in apology. “I didn’t mean to snap at you. I just always loathe the first day of rehearsal.”
“Me too.” Charlie wrapped his arm around Tao’s waist as the two continued across the plaza. “It’s always so awkward, but it also always ends up being just fine, yeah?” Tao let out a reluctant huff of agreement. “And it’s not like it’s an entirely new group of people- we know most of them!” Charlie gave his friend a reassuring squeeze before shoving his hands back into his coat pockets to protect them from the November chill.
Both boys slowed as they approached the imposing main entrance of the theatre complex. Charlie stared up at the enormous building, swallowed heavily, and then squared his shoulders.
“There’s nothing to feel anxious about,” he said with practised conviction. He heard Tao splutter behind him as he began to make his way up the concrete steps.
“Nothing to be nervous about ?” Tao squawked. “We are going to be on stage with HENRY MADDOX! Olivier, Tony, Emmy, and bloody Grammy award-winning Henry Maddox! And Evelyn Sanderson. EVELYN SANDERSON!”
Charlie avoided Tao’s eyes as he determinedly continued up the steps. “They’re just people,” he said firmly. “Just actors. Like us.”
“Like us ???” Tao stopped dead in his tracks, and Charlie turned back to see the beanie-clad boy gesturing wildly at the both of them. “Like US?”
Charlie giggled softly, his dimples flashing as he was forced to admit that Tao had a point.
The two lads were both twenty-two but, as casting directors constantly liked to tell them, they could pass for much younger. Tao was tall at just over six feet, but his gangly limbs, delicate features, and tightly coiled energy did not say Masculine Matinee Idol as much as Disgruntled Early 20th Century Aristocrat- or even more on-the-nose, Socially Inept Teenage Geek.
Charlie knew he was no Henry Maddox either. He was skinny (“Lithe!” Elle would exclaim), his face was strange (“Striking!” Elle insisted), and despite all of his drama school instructors’ collective efforts on his behalf, there was absolutely no hope of him ever passing for heterosexual (“Your flame burns too brightly!” Elle declared with pride. “Your light will not be dimmed!”)
No, Charlie thought with a smile, they would not be playing dashing romantic leads any time soon, but he had never been interested in those sorts of roles anyway.
Sure, he’d had the occasional flight of fancy- secret dreams of playing parts that were, to quote the Bard, out of his star. What actor didn’t? However, if he was going to make a living after he completed his training that winter, he needed to be practical. He would enthusiastically take on whatever roles came his way.
Anything was better than being himself.
Charlie hopped down the steps and reached out to place his hands on Tao’s shoulders. He tossed his wind-swept curls out of his eyes before launching into the same speech he had given himself in the mirror that morning.
“We’ve been cast in this show with Henry Maddox and Evelyn Sanderson and Gareth Hannah because Nathan believes we are good enough to share the stage with them. We’ve worked our arses off, and it’s finally paying off. All we need to do is keep working, and stay focused on the work.” Charlie squeezed Tao’s shoulders. “We can do this.”
Tao saw nothing but conviction in his friend’s navy eyes, but he of all people knew how good an actor Charlie was.
Sensing the taller boy’s scepticism, Charlie went on. “Tao, neither you or I are here to co-star in the next Maddox-led Marvel movie, or usurp Evelyn’s crown as Queen of the Period Drama-
“-I don’t know, Charlie,” Tao interrupted with a teasing grin.” I feel like you would slay in that crown-”
“- I would eat in that crown and leave no crumbs, but alas, the world is not ready.” Charlie grinned back at his friend. “But you know what you and I both have on lock?”
“Shakespeare?”
“Shakespeare.”
The two young men exchanged supportive nods, straightened their spines, and strode up the stairs. Tao bounded ahead to hold the door open for Charlie with a dramatic flourish. “After you, my Queen.”
The brunette was tempted to play along and swoop grandly into the lobby, but instead he gently linked his arm with Tao’s.
“Together,” he murmured, pulling Tao alongside him and guiding them through the entryway. The two friends fell into step, each confident footfall echoing quietly in the cavernous space.
“Come what come may…” Charlie whispered.
Tao rolled his eyes, but gave a grudging smile as he finished the line.
“Time and the hour runs through the roughest day.”
🍂🍃🍂🍃🍂🍃
Nathan took in the shivering crowd huddled around the hot water dispenser clutching steaming paper cups of tea. “Sorry about the chill, everyone!” he called. “We should have it sorted in a few minutes.” He caught Evelyn’s eye across the rehearsal hall, and returned her sympathetic smile with a grateful wince.
Evie Sanderson and Nathan Ajayi had known each other since drama school. On the surface, the short, queer, soft spoken Nigerian and the bold, statuesque blond beauty had seemed an unlikely pair of friends, but the two quickly bonded over their shared belief that people were more important than plays. Nathan’s determination to ensure theatre artists were treated better than he had been when he was first coming up was a large part of his current success as a director. Evelyn was likewise now one of the nation’s most famous, beloved, critically-acclaimed, sought-after actresses.
Nathan smiled fondly at his ever-patient friend where she was sitting elegantly on a cheap folding chair, her fur coat draped on her lap as she sipped the venti non-dairy macchiato her assistant had fetched for her. As expected, Evie was proving an excellent role model for the young actors in the room by arriving early. Nathan firmly believed that ten minutes early was in fact five minutes late, and expected as much from his collaborators. However, he was also embarrassed that Evie was here to see them fighting to get the heat working in the draughty rehearsal room. Again.
He surreptitiously blew on his hands and rubbed them together as he made his way towards the snack table and the promise of a hot beverage. The crowd that had been huddled by the water dispenser had largely migrated in search of the warmest spot in the room. Several little groups had formed along the large bank of windows in the vain hope that the sunlight might warm them, and Charlie stood with his face turned up towards the weak rays. He ran cold on the hottest of days, and was so chilled that he was just about ready to wrap his scarf around his head, even if it caused further havoc to his already hopelessly tousled hair.
“I thought they’d fixed this,” he sighed to Tao and James, taking a sip of revolting coffee and immediately regretting that he had not gone for the tea. He wrinkled his nose, and set the cup down on the windowsill as he took in the (admittedly stunning, if gloomy) view of the Thames.
James threw his tattooed arms around his two grumpy classmates, seemingly unaffected by the frigid air in his short-sleeved athletic shirt. “Happy to help you lads warm up later,” he crooned in each of their ears with a wink.
Charlie scoffed dismissively, but his smile betrayed his fondness for his shamelessly flirty friend. There was not a day that went by when James did not jokingly shoot his shot with Charlie- or honestly any Londoner who stood still long enough. James was almost never serious about it, and Charlie got the impression that the handsome blond simply enjoyed making people feel good about themselves with his playful compliments and gentle teasing.
“Still straight, I’m afraid,” Tao said, his voice characteristically deadpan.
“Can you really be that straight if your girlfriend is trans?” James countered with an impish smile and a nudge of Tao’s hip.
Charlie held his breath as Tao visibly stiffened. “I am a man who is attracted to women, and in a relationship with a woman . So I am not sure what you’re implying,” he responded, slowly extricating himself from James’ embrace to meet his eyes.
James’ cavalier demeanour fell away in an instant. “I didn’t mean anything. I apologise,” he said contritely, fidgeting nervously at the leather bracelets on his wrists. “No disrespect meant to Elle.”
To Charlie’s relief, Tao’s fierce expression immediately softened. “All good,” he said gruffly, giving James an awkward, laddish pat on the shoulder.
Charlie deftly slipped in between the two and leaned in conspiratorially. “Have you ever seen anyone so glamorous?” he whispered, giving a subtle nod toward Evelyn Sanderson. She was placing a delicate pair of gold reading glasses on her nose to peer down at the script in her hand. “I can’t believe we’re actually in the same room as her.”
“Should we go say hello?” James whispered back. “Most of us know each other at least a little, but no one is talking to her. It seems rude, yeah?”
“You’re right,” said Tao. “We should go introduce ourselves.”
“Absolutely,” said Charlie. “It’s only polite.”
Tao and James nodded.
None of them moved.
“... she doesn’t seem like the chatty sort,” Tao finally ventured.
James hummed in agreement. “Yeah mate, she looks like she wants to be left in peace.”
“Absolutely,” Charlie mumbled. “It’s only poli- oh thank fuck.”
Charlie cheered along with the rest of the assembled thespians as their stage manager Youssef burst through the double doors wheeling in a promisingly large space heater. Aled, Isaac, and Darcy followed behind with yet more heaters to hopefully warm the frigid room.
“Hold your applause and close the bloody drapes!” Youssef called, rolling his eyes at the responding groans. “I know, we all see little enough of the sun, but the casing is old and the cold air gets in.”
There was a brief moment of mourning as the heavy curtains were drawn across the wall of windows. Fortunately, although the hall was too large to ever feel cosy, it was one of the few non-public-facing spaces in the building to have updated lighting. Charlie appreciated the soft glow of the pendant fixtures that hung overhead, and more than appreciated the sound of the heaters roaring to life.
Charlie was unsurprised to see Aled and Isaac- they were the assistant stage manager and dramaturg- but Darcy’s appearance in the rehearsal hall was an unexpected delight. He made his way across the room to where his friend was taping down a run of electrical extension cord along the worn sprung floor.
“Hullo there, hero!” Charlie called, ignoring the looks of surprise in his periphery. The majority of Charlie’s cohort would describe him as ‘reserved’ if they were feeling generous, and ‘frigid’ if they were feeling honest.
(“They’re just jealous of you!” Elle would fume. “If they had anything close to your level of focus and dedication, maybe they would be able to keep up, but they don’t , and so they resent the reminder that you actually take acting seriously !”) Charlie’s real friends knew better- knew him - and so he had long since stopped caring what the rest of his peers thought of him. Much.
“Springtime!” Darcy crowed, standing up from where they had been kneeling by the wall outlet to leap into their taller friends’ arms. “Happy first rehearsal! I’m so chuffed for you!”
“Ta, love,” Charlie said, looking down with a chuckle before reaching nimble fingers into Darcy’s riotously dyed hair. He carefully picked out wood chips as they continued to chat. “How did you get pulled into defrosting this icebox?”
“The scene shop has the monopoly on heaters and extension cords. It’s even colder down there, if you can believe it.”
Charlie shivered in sympathy. “That’s awful, I’m sorry. Thank you for lending these to us.”
“Gotta keep the talent happy!” Darcy’s laugh sounded genuinely good-natured, but Charlie knew them well enough to detect the edge underneath it. He pulled the last bit of scene shop debris out of their hair, and met Darcy’s bright blue-green eyes with his own stormy sea-gaze. “Darcy, you are-”
“Ohmygod,” the dungaree-clad whirlwind interrupted, clutching at Charlie’s arms. “Is that…?”
“Yup. Evelyn Sanderson. Surreal, yeah? We have all been too starstruck to manage to go over and say hel-”
Charlie blinked, and Darcy disappeared before his eyes. His jaw dropped when he turned around to see his friend already halfway across the room, making a beeline for Evelyn and already reaching out for what promised to be an exhuberant handshake.
“What are they doing ?” Tao asked as he and Isaac stepped up beside Charlie.
“Being Darcy,” Charlie responded fondly, watching with admiration- and perhaps a little envy -as Evelyn looked up from her script with a start and then a genuine smile as she shook Darcy’s offered hand. The boys were too far away to hear the short exchange between the two, but gasped when they saw Evelyn and Darcy burst into laughter.
The entire room was momentarily spellbound by the sight of immaculate Evelyn giggling merrily with paint-spattered Darcy. Then a booming voice sounded outside the studio, and the doors swung open to reveal the decidedly less pleasant sight of resident producer Arthur Greene.
(“He looks like a bloated, badly-aged Draco Malfoy… if Draco had become a used car salesman,” Elle had mused. Charlie had agreed with her assessment. The man’s demeanour was almost as dodgy as his terribly expensive yet somehow also simply terrible suits.)
“Right this way, chaps!” Arthur Greene snivelled, holding open the door and gesturing magnanimously as Henry Maddox entered. The star was shorter than Charlie had imagined, but every bit as charismatic and… appealing.
(“Jesus Christ that man is HOT as FUCK,” Elle had screeched. She was not wrong.)
“Breathe, Spring,” Tao whispered with a smirk.
Charlie knew that Tao assumed his sudden struggle for oxygen was due to Maddox, especially since every allosexual human in the studio was staring either thirstily or admiringly at the outrageously fit actor. However, it was the man entering behind Henry that had left Charlie in breathless awe.
Gareth Hannah was not another muscled Marvel star, nor an obvious romantic lead. While Henry seemed to fill the room with presence, Gareth had the milder, self-possessed energy of a thoughtful observer. Despite this, or perhaps because of it, the salt-and-pepper haired Northerner had a career that Charlie found profoundly inspiring. Although he had tried his best to mentally prepare to meet his idol, Charlie was so overcome with nervous elation that he felt ready to float right off the ground.
His bubble deflated when he saw Harry Greene walk into the room... and violently burst when the final person sauntered through the door.
Ben.
As he internally plummeted, Charlie saw Tao still watching him out of the corner of his eye, and so he fought to keep his face carefully blank.
Thanks to relentless practice, Charlie was excellent at many things. One of those things was emotional compartmentalization.
The stakes were too high to let himself feel anything at all about Benjamin Hope. He was not going to let the older boy’s presence ruin the biggest creative and professional opportunity of his life.
He was not going to let Ben Hope hurt him ever again.
With an almost invisible nod to himself, Charlie forced his gaze away from Ben’s deceptively bright smile to where Arthur Greene was attempting to charm Evelyn. He moved his arms to embrace her as she rose from her chair, and then awkwardly struggled to recover himself as Evelyn held out a decisive, perfectly manicured hand out in front of her for an cooly professional shake.
“Okay, now even I am a little in love with her,” Isaac admitted.
“All hail the Queen,” Charlie agreed. He, Isaac, and Tao continued to warm themselves by the heater as Arthur enthusiastically introduced Evelyn to his nephew Harry, and then to Ben. Charlie knew how charming Ben could be, and tried not to grind his teeth when he saw Evelyn thaw slightly. Nathan had just approached Arthur’s assemblage of A-listers when Youssef’s voice suddenly filled the room.
“REHEARSAL WILL BEGIN IN FIVE MINUTES. PLEASE TAKE THIS TIME TO FIND YOUR SEATS.”
After dashing back to the snack table for a tea, Charlie made his way around the circular arrangement of long folding tables. He found his name card, and set himself down between Otis, who he sort of knew, and a curvaceous brunette he had never seen before.
“Hiya Charlie,” said the strapping lad. “And hello there, I’m Otis.” Charlie held back a snort as the young man suavely smoothed back his box braids before reaching his muscled arm out to shake the woman’s hand.
“Sahar, she/her, nice to meet you Otis- and Charlie,” she said, giving Otis’ hand a firm shake and both boys a disarming smile.
“Oh yeah, uh, he. I’m a he,” Otis stuttered.
This should be interesting, Charlie thought. He hid a smile by turning to take in the gathering of actors and production team members around him. His eyes met Imogen’s, and the bubbly blonde mouthed a “hi” at him from across the circle. Her grin was even more luminous than usual, and Charlie was not surprised. He knew that her role was a dream come true for her, and one he thought was well-deserved.
Tara was sitting next to Immy, and Charlie waved goodbye to Darcy as they gave their girlfriend a quick good luck peck on the cheek before turning to head back to the scene shop. Charlie tried to catch Tara’s eye, but she was furiously typing away on her phone, her brow furrowed with worry as she glanced up at the door and then back down at her screen. He looked around the circle trying to figure out who the latecomer she was waiting on was, and found Ben staring right at him.
Ben smiled sweetly, gazing up at Charlie from under his lashes with dark eyes.
Charlie kept his expression neutral, gave Ben a small nod, then continued to scan the circle even though he had forgotten who or what he was even looking for.
You can do this. You can. Focus on the WORK, and you’ll be fine.
Charlie half-listened when Youssef announced that they would begin shortly, but that Arthur Greene had a few words to share first. When the pompous producer launched into blustering welcomes, Charlie caught Tao’s eye, and both boys had to look away before they dissolved into giggles.
“Thespians, countrymen, lend me your ears,” Arthur boomed before chortling at his own cleverness, oblivious to the collective wince.
Greene was ridiculous, but Charlie had to give it to him, the man could project.
“I could not be more thrilled to have four of the greatest industry talents in the room with us.” He gestured grandly to each person in turn, compelling the room to applaud. “Evelyn, Henry, Gareth, and Nathan.” Henry managed to beam winningly, but the other three could only manage polite smiles.
“I am doubly thrilled that the rest of this cast, these tremendously talented young folk,” Arthur said as he clapped a large hand on Harry’s shoulder, “have the opportunity to learn from the masters of their craft.”
Evelyn and Nathan exchanged glances. Charlie could have sworn he saw both their faces twitch.
“I am sure I do not have to tell you all that, while I have complete faith in this thrillingly talented cast and crew, a great deal is riding on this endeavour.” Arthur squeezed Harry’s shoulder, and the smug young man fought back a grimace. “It is my great pleasure to be able to support Nathan’s thrilling vision, and I trust you will all realise it beautifully, with a critically, creatively, and commercially successful production.”
Arthur continued to grin garishly through the audible gulps around him.
“I am afraid I can not stay for the table read, but I wish you all a-”
“- thrilling -” Charlie heard Sahar mutter under her breath.
“-simply thrilling first day together.”
“Thank you, Arthur,” Nathan said, bringing his hands together in another polite round of applause and thankfully also bringing the welcoming remarks to a gentle but decisive end. The rest of the room clapped softly, muttering half-hearted thanks as Arthur exchanged more overly-familiar farewells with the celebrity actors before finally striding out.
“RIGHT.”
Everyone snapped to attention as Youssef stood up from his seat next to Nathan’s. “We’ll get started. As Mr. Greene said, we are simply thrilled -” Nathan hid a smile behind his hand as the rest of the room fought back chuckles- “to have you all with us.”
Youssef’s eyes lingered briefly on the one empty seat at the table, and he pulled his phone out of his back pocket and started to type as he continued speaking. He never looked down at his screen, and Charlie would have been impressed had he not seen Youssef pull off this Manager Magic many times before.
“We’ll begin with introductions, followed by some opening thoughts from our director. Normally we would have design presentations, but scheduling conflicts mean that we will be welcoming our set and costume designers later this afternoon. However, we'll be learning a bit about the design and the larger context of this production from Nathan and our dramaturg Isaac.”
Charlie smiled widely at Isaac where the quiet but well-liked young man was acknowledging the smattering of congratulatory murmurs with a serene nod.
“After that presentation, we’ll do the Equity* dance, take ten, and then begin a read-through. Any que-”
Youssef was interrupted by the squeak of the studio door opening.
“Caught another one!” Arthur Greene chortled loudly from the corridor. “In you go, Nelson my boy!”
Their missing actor walked hesitantly through the door with a quiet thank you and an embarrassed smile.
Charlie’s first thought was, Oh wow.
Because my God, this newcomer was beautiful.
The tall, auburn-haired young man gave the room an endearingly lopsided grin. “I’m so sorry everyone. I got a bit lost on my way here.”
Charlie’s second thought was, Oh no.
Because he could feel his ears grow hot under his curls.
Absolutely NOT, he thought. Now is not the time to develop a fucking crush.
“All good, Nick,” Youssef said, gesturing towards the singular empty seat. “Now you know the way, so it won’t happen again.” The ginger flushed and nodded, and made his way over to his spot in between Harry and Imogen.
“‘’Ey, Nick!” Harry crowed. “You made it!” He clapped Nick on the back in a gesture alarmingly reminiscent of his uncle. Nick’s fringe fell forward as he ducked his head in greeting, shifting to find a comfortable position for his large frame in the creaky folding chair.
Charlie’s third thought was, Well. That’s sorted.
If Nick was friends with Harry, then he was almost certainly an entitled cockwaffle. Charlie felt his momentary surge of attraction fade. This boy was clearly going to be trouble.
Strike One: Late.
Charlie caught Imogen smiling encouragingly at Nick. The freckled young man flushed slightly, and gave her a grateful smile back.
Strike Two: Straight.
“You’re just in time, Nick,” Nathan said warmly. “Now that we are all met, welcome everyone…”
Charlie turned to give their acclaimed director his full attention, but could not help but continue to observe Nick out of the corner of his eye. He was shrugging off his Carhartt jacket and placing it over the back of his chair, revealing the distinctive jersey underneath.
Charlie’s jaw clenched.
Strike Three: Rugby Lad.
That settled it.
Outside of whatever might be necessary for the good of the production, Charlie wanted absolutely nothing to do with Nick Fucking Nelson.