Archive of Our Own

"Nobody, who has not been in the interior of a family, can say what the difficulties of any individual of that family may be." ~ Jane Austen, Emma

i.

"This is intolerable," said Daphne, as she stormed into Kate's sitting room. "We have to do something about them."

Kate looked up from her correspondence to see Daphne pacing the length of the room. She set her letters down next to the tea tray and poured her sister-in-law a cup. Kate held it out, but Daphne shook her head and continued to pace. Given that Daphne was as tea-mad as the rest of the Bridgerton clan, Kate took that as a very bad sign.

"By them, I can only assume you mean our husbands. What have they done now?"

Daphne snorted. "Of course I mean our husbands. Or rather, mine. Though I assume my brother will descend into similar foolishness before the evening is over."

"Daphne!" Kate said sharply. Once a Bridgerton drifted into angry rambling, it was very difficult to get them back on track. "Tell me what Simon's done."

Daphne halted in her tracks and pivoted to face Kate, her hands going to her hips, and her face the picture of righteous indignation. "He doesn't want me to play Pall Mall tomorrow. The nerve!"

"I see," murmured Kate. And she did. To say that Simon became overprotective when Daphne was expecting was an understatement. Still, Daphne had been pregnant during last year's game and that had not stopped her from playing. "Did he offer a reason?"

Daphne waved her hand through the air as if to dismiss Kate's question or her husband entirely, Kate was not certain which. "He doesn't think that it would be good for me or the baby, naturally. Given the number of things that he doesn't think would be good for the baby, I begin to wonder what he thinks would be good for it."

Kate smothered a laugh by lifting her teacup to her lips. "Well, you'll simply have to ignore him and prove him wrong by beating us all. Though I warn you--I have been practicing."

"I would expect no less," Daphne said, tipping her head approvingly to Kate. "You're a Bridgerton now. You know the importance of such things."

"I believe I understood them before I married your brother."

"True," Daphne said. She finally settled on the opposite sofa and picked up the tea that Kate had poured for her. "You truly were meant to be a member of the family."

"Thank you," Kate said. "I think."

"Oh, it was a compliment, I assure you," Daphne said. She shook her head. "But we've wandered from the crucial point. The reason I came to tell you this is that Anthony was listening outside the library when Simon and I were arguing. I suspect he will be coming to have a similar conversation with you shortly."

Kate stared at Daphne in horror. "He wouldn't dare," she said.

Daphne raised her shoulders in a shrug. "We shall see," she said. "But I believe there is little my brother wouldn't dare."

Kate rose from the sofa and took her own turn pacing. "Of all the ridiculous, heavy-handed nonsense! Oh, I shall make him pay for this."

"Well," Daphne said from the sofa, "in fairness to my brother, you may wish to wait until he actually tries to forbid you from playing to get angry with him. Perhaps he won't prove such an overbearing fool."

"Oh, I assure you that any preemptive anger I feel will not diminish my actual anger in the slightest," Kate said.

No sooner had she spoken than the sound of her name echoed through the halls of Aubrey Hall. Kate froze in her tracks and pivoted so that she was facing the door, her arms crossed firmly over her chest. Forewarned was forearmed, and all that.

"Kate!" Anthony said, pushing into the room as if he owned it, which Kate supposed technically he did. "We must talk at once." He looked down at Daphne who sat placidly sipping her tea. "Daff, would you mind giving us a spot of privacy?"

"Daphne stays," Kate snapped. She steadied herself. No use in giving the game away. When she spoke again, her words were sickly sweet. "Was there something you wanted?"

Anthony began to look uncomfortable, as if he knew that he was walking into a trap.

Good, Kate thought.

"Well," he started, pulling ever so slightly at his cravat, "about tomorrow."

"Yes?" Kate asked.

Anthony's eyes went wide and Kate knew that he recognized that tone of her voice. That voice had never meant anything good for him and it certainly didn't mean anything good now.

"I was just wondering," he said, stumbling over his words in a way that was decidedly un-Anthony-like, "do you really think it's a good idea for you to play tomorrow? I wouldn't want you or the baby to come to any harm."

"Yes," Kate said.

Anthony frowned. "Yes, you think it's a good idea? Or yes that you think that you could hurt yourself?

"The former," Kate said. "Was that all?"

Anthony nodded and began to back towards the door. "Yes."

"Good," Kate said. "Now go away. I was having tea with your sister and do not desire your company." She rested her hand on her still flat stomach. "Women's business. You understand."

"Of course," Anthony said. His face had gone stark white, much to Kate's amusement. "I shall see you both later."

He opened the door and fled.

"Well done," Daphne said admiringly.

Kate offered her a small, victorious smile. "Thank you." She resumed her seat and lifted her tea cup once more. "Now. I believe what we need is a plan."

ii.

Colin Bridgerton was many things, but a fool was not among them. Which was why, upon being summoned to his sister-in-law's sitting room and being faced with not only her fiercely determined face, but that of his sister's as well, he knew that something momentous had to be afoot.

He looked back and forth between the women, one eyebrow raised, waiting for one of them to speak. Daphne succumbed first. She always had been susceptible to the eyebrow, even when none of his other ploys were successful.

"Colin," Daphne said, her best winsome smile firmly in place. "We require--would like, rather--to ask for your assistance in a small matter."

"Tiny, really," interjected Kate. She shot a warning look in Daphne's direction, as if ordering Daphne not to overplay their hand. Colin didn't know why. Any sort of conspiracy the two of them wanted to involve themselves in, he would be a willing party to. Especially if it irritated Anthony.

"Oh?" Colin asked. He did his best to keep his tone mild, but he feared that his curiosity was too readily apparent. "Define tiny for me, won't you?"

Daphne looked like she wanted to stamp her foot at him, which would have been ridiculous considering she was still sitting down. "Colin."

"What?" he asked innocently. Just because he intended to help her torture their brother didn't mean that he couldn't get enjoyment of torturing her as well. After all, what were brothers for? "It seems a simple enough question."

"We would like your assistance in plotting--" Kate turned to look at Daphne, as if she were questioning her word choice, to which Daphne gave a firm nod "--plotting an act of revenge upon our husbands."

"Of course," Colin said promptly. "But I really must ask--what have they done?"

Kate frowned. "Must you know?"

Colin lifted a hand and rocked it from side to side, as if weighing his response. "Must know? No. Want desperately to know?" He grinned at them, the winning one that made him the bane of matchmaking mama's existence. "Yes, of course."

"We may as well tell him," Daphne said on a heavy sigh. "He'll find out anyway. He always does."

Colin turned his head, nodding at Kate. "It's true, I'm afraid."

"Fine," said Kate. "If you must know, our husbands have turned rather, well, imperious, regarding tomorrow's Pall Mall rematch and our conditions."

"Conditions?" Colin asked.

The women stared back at him, practically daring him to ask for clarification. Even Colin was capable of simple maths.

"Oh," he said. "Congratulations?"

"Thank you," Daphne said. She leaned forwards in her seat. "Now. This is what we have in mind."

She detailed the plan for him. As he listened, Colin's smile got wider and wider. He knew Daphne was his favorite sister for a reason. When she finished, Colin looked back and forth between them and spoke.

"Ladies," he said. "It is an honor and a privilege to be at your service."

They answered him with matching grins.

iii.

It wasn't as though Daphne liked plotting against her husband. Truly, it wasn't. She loved Simon very much and on the whole thought he made an excellent husband, though she supposed she hadn't much of a basis of comparison.

Still, when the situation called for it--and a before breakfast interrogation as to whether she truly felt up to the minimal exertion that Pall Mall entailed truly did call for it--she was ready and willing to do so.

"Simon," Daphne said exasperatedly. "Enough. If you are truly that concerned with the baby's--and mine too, I presume--welfare, perhaps you could make yourself useful by fetching us breakfast."

Simon gave her a sheepish smile. "I'm being an ogre, aren't I?"

"Yes," said Daphne feelingly. "A well meaning one, mind you, but an ogre nonetheless."

Simon bent low and kissed her with such enthusiasm that she almost began to wonder if their plans for him and her overbearing beast of a brother were truly necessary. And then he promptly spoiled it by drawing back and pointing his finger at her as if she were a dog.

"Stay in bed," he ordered. "I'll be back with your food as soon as I can."

Daphne did her best not to roll her eyes at him as he strode briskly toward the door to their bedchamber.

He opened it and turned back to face her. "I do love you, you know," he said.

She softened, just a little. "I do. For some reason, I happen to love you as well."

Simon grinned at her, all his rakish charm fixed firmly in place. It didn't melt her heart, but it certainly warmed other parts of her anatomy. "I know," he said. "It's why I'm sure you'll forgive me for this."

He slipped the key out of the lock and through the door.

"Simon Basset," Daphne shouted, bolting from the bed and pounding her fists on the door. "You let me out right this instant."

"If you insist on playing that ridiculous game this afternoon, you need your rest," Simon said, his voice only slightly muffled by the thick door. "I'm simply ensuring that you get it."

"I will make you pay," Daphne vowed.

Simon had the temerity to laugh. "I sincerely hope so, my love. Now rest."

"Blergh," said Daphne.

iv.

"Tell me again why we all had to be here before Hastings and Anthony?" asked Edwina. She was trying to keep pace with Kate's much longer legs as they crossed the Aubrey Hall grounds on their way to the Pall Mall field.

Kate spared her sister only the briefest of glances. "Because we are going to trick them."

"But why are we tricking them?" Edwina asked. She knew it was pointless. Kate hadn't seen fit to tell her in all the times Edwina had asked for so far, but still she did not understand what either man could have done that was so terrible. They were certainly both pleasant enough to her.

Kate halted in her tracks and turned to face Edwina, her hands fixed firmly in place on her hips. "Edwina, are you going to help us or not?"

"Yes, of course," Edwina said hastily. She knew how seriously Kate took Pall Mall, but honestly, this was taking things to extremes. "I just wished to understand. I'm sorry."

Kate sighed and shook her head. "No, I should be the one who is sorry," she said. "I know I'm being a beast. But truly, Edwina, it is better if you don't know. Then you can just be your charming self and Anthony and Simon will not suspect a thing."

"I can do that," Edwina said.

"Of course you can," Kate said. She leaned forward and gave Edwina a brief hug. "Now, come. We'll be late."

Kate started back towards the field, an even more determined stride in her step. Edwina sighed and tried to keep up.

v.

When Simon reached the Pall Mall field, he found Anthony surveying the course. Alone. He frowned and turned back to look for his wife. He was certain she'd left before him. She should have been here by now.

"Bridgerton," he said, nodding his head at his once friend. "Where are the others?"

"Hastings," Anthony said, returning the nod stiffly. "I just arrived and found the course assembled but with no sign of the others. I expect they'll be along shortly."

"They should have been along already," Simon muttered to himself.

"What was that?" Anthony asked absently. He looked like he was plotting strategy.

"I said, I'll get the Pall Mall set from the shed." Simon didn't bother repeating himself. He was probably worrying for nothing. He was certain Daphne would tell him that he was.

That captured Anthony's attention. "Let me," he said, in apparent show of grace that Simon knew was entirely related to the claiming of the Mallet of Death.

"You can have the black mallet," Simon said. "I do not care about this game. I care about making my wife happy."

He started towards the shed, and despite his words, Anthony was hot at his heels.

"I would hope you care about Daff's happiness," Anthony said. "I believe I gave you explicit instructions to that effect before your ill-advised marriage."

Simon resisted the urge to push him. He threw open the door to the shed and stepped inside. Bridgerton followed him. He looked around the relatively small space and saw no sign of the Pall Mall equipment. "Where is it?"

Anthony pushed past him, obviously assuming that Simon was simply blind. "It's not here," he said, sounding confused. "Where is it?"

"I believe I said that already," Simon answered dryly. "Could the others have taken it out before they disappeared?"

He turned back to the door, only to have it shut in his face. "What the--"

"Hello, husband," said Daphne's voice from the other side of the door. "Not so much fun being on the other side of the door, is it?"

"Daphne," he said warningly. He shook the door handle. "Let me out now."

"No," she said. "I don't believe that I will."

Anthony pushed his way up to the door and tried the same thing with the door. "Daphne. You don't want to do this."

"Oh, I don't want to do this to you," she said cheerfully. "Kate does."

"Kate?" Anthony repeated back incredulously. "My wife?"

"Yes," came Kate's voice from the other side of the door. "Your wife. Not a servant that you can order about whenever you like."

Anthony blanched. "If this is about yesterday," he said, and Simon could tell he was trying to be conciliatory, "I said I was sorry."

"You did," Kate acknowledged. "But that doesn't mean that you're forgiven."

"Kate..." Anthony said warningly.

"I'm not letting you out," she said. "I'd suggest that the two of you sit down, relax. Perhaps have a talk about being overbearing, autocratic, terrible husbands. I suspect you'll have a great deal to discuss."

"Daphne, please," Simon tried. "Can't we talk about this? Just the two of us?"

There was no answer. Simon turned to Anthony and said, "I think they may mean it."

"Bollocks," said Anthony.

vi.

Anthony wasn't sure how long they sat in silence. He took one side of the shed and Simon the other, and they very pointedly did not look at one another.

He studied his boots, making a note to have a word with his valet about polishing them. Simon appeared to be counting the slats of wood in the roof. It was hard to tell when you weren't looking.

Finally, Anthony spoke. "Did you truly lock Daphne up?"

From across the dimly lit shed, he saw Simon wince. "You heard that?"

"Yes," Anthony said. "May I ask why?"

"I wanted her to rest," Simon said. "She doesn't think she needs to, but she does."

Anthony studied his face. Simon looked resigned and embarrassed, but most of all he looked sincere. And whatever his feelings about Simon's behavior prior to their marriage, it was hard to deny that the man was besotted with Daphne. His sister's face lit up every time Simon walked into the room and though Simon was better at hiding his emotions than Daphne was, Anthony had seen him wear similar enough expressions enough times to know that her feelings were reciprocated.

Perhaps that meant that it was past time for him to put his grudge aside. He just wished that meant not having to swallow a rather considerable amount of his pride.

"You do love her then?" Anthony found himself asking, without intending to speak the words. Apparently his subconscious had decided for him then.

Simon looked at him curiously and nodded once. "Not that it's your business, precisely, but yes. I love Daphne and our daughter and the child she's carrying now. Does that satisfy you?"

"I suppose that it does," Anthony said. He cleared his throat, giving himself time to prepare himself to say the words he knew must come next. "I believe I owe you an apology."

"Excuse me?" Simon asked.

"You heard me," Anthony said through gritted teeth. "Do not make me repeat myself."

"Fine," Simon said, now openly grinning. "I suppose that I can manage that much."

"Good," Anthony said. He stood and brushed off his breeches before crossing the small space between them. He offered Simon his hand. "Friends?"

Simon stood as well and shook his hand. "Friends."

"Good," said Anthony. "That's done then."

"Yes," Simon said, nodding his head. "Now since we're friends again, tell me: what did you do to incur Kate's wrath?"

Anthony groaned. "Perhaps we should ease back into the notion of friendship."

"Agreed," said Simon. "Now how do we go about getting out of here?"

"Oh, I have an idea," said Anthony. He stood in front of the door and bellowed, "Daphne! If you don't let us out this instant, I am telling your husband of the time that you dressed yourself in Colin's clothes and--"

The door fell open, Daphne framed in its opening, panting as if she'd rushed there in a hurry. "You wouldn't," she gasped.

He smiled down at her and patted her on the cheek. "I would." He turned to Simon and said, "Coming, Hastings?"

"Indeed," Simon said, stepping out onto the lawn. "I should probably disapprove of you blackmailing my wife, but I find myself endlessly intrigued. Colin's clothes, my love?"

"Anthony," Daphne said, narrowing her eyes first at her husband and then at her brother, "think of all of the lovely stories I could tell Kate about you."

"Nothing says Pall Mall like a spot of blackmail," Anthony said cheerfully. He spotted Kate swinging the Mallet of Death and strode quickly to her side, plucking it from her hand. "Thank you for saving that for me, wife." He grinned at her indignant expression and bent to steal a kiss from her lips.

"Now," he said. "Shall we begin?"