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It’s unfair. It’s always been so unfair, everything. Since the birth of the universe, when nothing became everything and life hadn’t even begun. It was just them and Her and he didn’t realize it yet, but it was so unfair. The way that the end was already written, that She could be that selfish and take it all away. So unfair. Why even give if the whole purpose was to take it away. What joy is there in the act of gifting if She never meant to make it all last? It’s so unfair. It was unfair from the moment that he laid eyes on those fiery red hair and those sparkling eyes and he understood what colours would be and what power they would hold. It was unfair when blinding white became dark blacks and dirty greys. It was unfair because eyes were hidden and smiles faded and colours didn’t have power anymore, not like before. It was unfair when names were given and taken and they were left scrambling for new ones that didn’t fit right like before. New names weird on the mouth and sour in taste and shape, new names that were never meant to be heard, much less spoken. It was unfair when it wasn’t all of them. When they were one and now they were two and they will be none at all, as it is written. It’s not fair and it shouldn’t have happened, it was preventable. It was unfair when they had to meet again knowing it wasn’t like the first time and it would never be again. It was unfair when the world was so vast and too interesting not to explore. It was unfair when names kept changing and he could not forget every single one. It was so unfair to see it all and never have any of it. It felt unfair when they parted ways even if they weren’t supposed to cross paths in the first place. It was unfair when The Plan kept going and no one was making the necessary changes to Make It Stop. It was clearly wrong and even if it wasn’t they couldn’t do it now. They needed more time and it needed to be pushed back just a little. They needed just a little more time. He needed just a little more time. It was unfair when they had to do it themselves, but maybe that’s the only part that wasn’t really unfair. It gave them more time, in a way. But then it was unfair again as they held hands and the unwanted goodbyes were unfair and the loss in his chest, too. The memories were and are unfair, because they will soon be pointless. They won’t need memories where they’re headed and She knows but She gave them anyway. It was unfair when peace was kind of restored and when there was hope filling the air. It was unfair when the days seemed normal and he could pretend it wouldn’t end. It was unfair when everyone else could and they weren’t allowed.
Were they allowed?
It was unfair when he was given an opportunity to make things better and he didn’t understand. It was unfair when he really wanted to help, he could finally help, he was going to dig their way out, it wasn’t going to be unfair anymore. It was unfair when he was disappointed because it wasn’t his fault. It was Hers and they both knew, it was unfair that he had forgotten for so long. It was unfair when the light was in his eyes and the stars weren’t around them. It was unfair when the air got sucked out of the room and everything darkened. It was unfair when eyes could not be seen again. The kiss was the unfairest thing of all. It was unfair that he couldn’t take it all back. It was unfair that he couldn’t go back to the beginning and to it right this time. It was unfair that he had to try so hard. It is unfair that it probably won’t work, because he didn’t do it right and She won’t give another chance.