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Published:
2024-06-09
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2024-06-09
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1/?
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Adam the Man the Myth the Dickmaster (On Hiatus)

Summary:

Who says Adam was a real dick oh yeah, he did he did say he was the original dick but who says that women don't like him no one. Adam is going to have a heck of time with the women in heaven and hell and the sinister plot of who wants to destroy both heaven and hell in this alternate universe of hazbin hotel.

Notes:

Hope all of you that are reading this enjoy it

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Time heals all wounds

Chapter Text

Before episode 1 of Hazbin Hotel 7 years ago 

 

A masquerade ball was taking place in a big white marble palace, the sound of violins, piano, flutes playing in the night, the bright lights coming from the mansion brightening the dark blue night of hell. 

 

“How the ever fuck did they convince me to come here to hell to talk to Lucicunt and that whore Lilith”. A male voice said to himself landing on his feet and tucking his golden angelic wings away and his halo he sees a reflective surface and looks at himself then smirks “ Even though I don't like formality that much because it's such a bitch I look good, me Adam the first man”. Adam was wearing a black and silver tux suit with black slacks and gray dancing shoes his brown hair usually in a messy style is slicked back and his chin scruff is shaved in a roguish kind of way because he refused to get rid of it even though Sera wanted him too “Proved that bitch wrong before I came here that look that she made was fucking hilarious and that yellow blush was icing on the cake and it was all the sweeter that Emily took a picture of it.

 

Smiling about that he put on a mask that his right hand and left hand lieutenants chose for him which matched his suit, a silver and black mask with some decal on it and eyeholes which revealed his yellow eyes. “Not bad I might have to take them out to eat the next time I see them” Adam thought, looking himself over once more making sure that everything was in place.

 

As soon as he gave his invitation to this small goat demon who was at the front gate with another small goat demon they guided him inside to the ballroom and as soon they opened his door Adam was having some regrets but was also pretty impressed. Seeing all of the demon royalties which is a lot, powerful overlords, and the leaders of the 7 rings. He had to admit though that this masquerade wasn’t too bad but still not his taste. He thanked the man himself that he was going under the radar and no one has approached to talk to him. “Know let me go find those fuckers and the Quicker I do the less I have to be here with these monsters… but I have to admit some of these women here are really hot as fuck” Adam thought while checking out a colorful looking demoness with all the features of a fox with wild colorful hair while her red/black mask covered her forehead to her eyes but that red dress hugged her in all the right places especially that ass. Then he looks over to a gray skin women with white long hair a bang covering one of her sides wearing a pink and yellowish mask and dress that hugged her well defined tits and a pretty good looking ass and besides her is another woman that looked similar to her this woman had long flowing white hair that reached down to her feet but it wasn’t touching the floor she was wearing a black and neon green/yellowish mask and dress it made her look so sexy especially that tight looking body of hers. Adam then shook his head before his eyes roamed to another “ No stop it find those fuckers talk and leave as soon as were done”. He thought walking away not knowing he had two set of eyes looking at him. 

 

1 hours later—---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“One fucking hour how the fuck is it so hard to find a midget clown and a blonde hair succubus”. Adam harshly whispered, grabbing two glasses of wine from a server and drank them one at a time calming him down a bit but not by much. 

 

After drinking a couple more he feels a feminine finger poking his shoulder either to talk or dance. “You know what fuck it I deserve a break please be a hot chick please.” Adam thought. When he turned around he was shocked and angry to see her shocked because she hadn't changed one bit except for the magneta horns which made her more beautiful as ever wearing a black strapless dress that showed off all the goods, black opera gloves, a pearl choker and a silver/black mask like the one he was wearing and angry because of who she is and what she did to him before he could say anything she put a finger to her black lips shushing him and grabbed his hand then the lights shut off and a beam of light shines on them. 

 

 

Adam could feel the stares of everyone in the room, but he didn't care he was just staring at her light violet eyes until he firmly grabbed her hand and proceeded to put his hand on her waist “Lilith” he whispered and as soon as he did, they started to waltz.

 

(Play To death we dance by Peter Grundy).

Their movement was like the wind. Each step they took was like a breeze, nice, and refreshing but with a hint of danger to it like in any second the wind would turn into a storm that's what made it so exciting. “Where is that clown Lil” Adam whispered, proceeding to twirl her once then back to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered “Around dickmaster”. That pissed him off a bit but quickly calmed down and he proceeded to underarm turn front to front back to back her showing some of his skills her movement was flawless not one mistake or misstep she knew him too well and he knew it, but he also knew her, and she knew that. She then proceeds to smile at him, but he gives her a blank look trying not to show his smile at her. She frowned a bit, but he didn't care. She then wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered, “Lucifer is so much better” and then let go of his neck.

“This bitch!” Adam screamed angrily inside he then brought her close to him and proceeded to take her mask off as soon as he did that she reached for his mask. He didn't know why he didn't push her away but she soon took his off exposing him to everybody around but they never stopped dancing it was heated, passionate even if you dared touch them it felt like you would burn alive even watching this display was heating the eyes of everybody around but they couldn’t stop staring at this magnificent display of their dancing. Adam then sees Lilith leaning towards him and he didn't know why but he started to lean towards her their eyes closed as their lips got closer and closer to each other until he at the last second snapped out of it and dipped her as his fingers went across her dress up to the in between of her breasts then caressing her face. Her face flushed, sweating, and her panting was making her breast jiggle as soon as she caught her breath Adam undipped her and then started running going out the door ignoring the clapping and cheers of everyone around.

A pair of eyes staring as he ran out the ballroom door “Hmmm interesting” they whispered with a radiotic voice 

 

5 minutes later outside the palace—--------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

“FFFUUUUCCCCKKKKKKK!!!”  Adam yelled out on his knees as soon as he got outside “That fucking cunt ass whore she knew what she was doing once she said his fucking name I hate her so fucking much you know what fuck this I'm leaving I don't care what Sera or the higher ups say to me for not talking to that clown motherfucker and her”.  He seethed looking around, seeing that ironically he was at the palace garden he then spread out his wings and as his feet left the ground he felt a soft hand grab him and already knew who it was before he could say something he heard something he thought he would never hear from Lilith “I’m sorry Adam” he then looks at her his yellow staring into her violet ones and could see the sincereness of her words “For what” he responded “Everything but I don’t regret it one bit falling in love with Lucifer, Eden, Eve, or the birth of my daughter Charlie, or being the queen of hell the only thing I regret is hurting you Adam because I love you I finally figured that out after so long and when you showed up and we danced I just felt free to be me and the way you looked at me made me so happy I know you feel the same”. 

 

Adam lets out a small growl and proceed to wrap his hands around her throat squeezing it “Why now why say sorry to me after so fucking long you bitch why!”.  He shouted at her his eyes becoming blurry tears coming down his face he closed his eyes but quickly opened them feeling her hands wiping his tears away a couple tears coming down her face he then let go of her throat and proceeded to wipe hers away. They then leaned in and as soon as their lips connected to each other they let out all their emotions into it their lips movies in sync with each then their tongues battling for dominance her arms wrapped around his neck and his hands grabbing her ass letting out a moan once he did that they separated after a while they both let out smirks Adam then whispered into her ear something that made her eyes widen but then let out a Cheshire smile and then she whispered something into his ear that made Adam smile smugly and made his dick even harder than it was already. 

 

Lilith then grabs his tux and proceeds to open it with force, the buttons flying everywhere “Great hell I thought he would let himself go but damn he is ripped”. Lilith thought, taking in Adam’s chiseled chest and 6 pack abs of steel lusting and loving over it. Adam let out a cocky laugh seeing Lilith stare at his upper body “Ha bet she thought I would let myself go, Well I did but thanks to my two lieutenants and my army of female angels they convinced me to lose all that weight it was a bitch but worth it”. Adam thought he then let out a groan of pleasure when he felt Lilith using her tongue licking his abs and leaving black kiss marks on them while one of her hands goes to his pants unbuttoning it stopping her ministrations to his ripped body letting out a groan of displeasure Lilith on her knees gives him a playful wink but then as soon as she pulled down his pants her eyes widen feeling something hit her chin “Dear hell is that what I think it is, no it can’t be he was huge before but not this huge ”. 

 

Lilith then moved her head back and saw one of the hugest cocks that she has ever laid eyes on 15 inches of womb breaking bitch making veiny meat the width of it would spread her really good. The size of his balls were like tennis balls filled with hot fertile white creamy substance. It made her pussy wet and made her inner demon succubus scream with euphoria and to take him now and skip the foreplay. 

 

Adam, seeing her reaction smirked and being the ever so nice guy he had to say this to her “Hey bitch are you going to just stare all night at it or are you… ahhh”.  Adam groaned, feeling his back hit the garden's grass as Lilith straddled him making him groan in pleasure feeling those perfect thighs and also feeling something wet he saw the primal lustful loving look that Lilith was giving him eyeing him like a piece of meat she then proceeds to put her hands on his chest and claws it a bit making him almost scream in pain while she licked one of her fingers which had his blood on it she chuckled a bit which pissed him off “Oh so she wants to play it like that ha, okay two can play that game bitch”.  

 

 

He reaches to her dress and using his angelic strength proceeds to rip her dress and bra in one go revealing her sexy white creamy body to the night making her moan “You beast” . Adam then grabbed her perfectly d cup breast and started messaging them roughly while Lilith let out small moans feeling the pleasure that Adam was giving to her but when he twisted her pink nipples making her feel pain and pleasure “Oh fuck do that, oh sweet hell Adam. Lilith moaned to him this was music to his ears hearing the person he loved moaning his name in pleasure.

 

5 minutes later—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

“Oh fuck, Oh Adam keep fucking me just like that keep bashing my womb with that magnificent cock of yours”. Lilith moaned out loud like a slut riding him cowgirl style the way her tits were bouncing were so hypnotic. He then grabbed her ass bringing her down faster and a bit harsher the sound of two beings moaning/groaning going at it in the nightly garden was somehow not heard from the inside of the palace. “Oh fuck Lil your going to drive me crazy” Adam groaned still bringing her down fast and hard while she was still riding him after a bit they switched position. 

 

“Oh just like that treat me like the bitch I am Adam my body, my soul, my everything is yours just don’t stop”. Lilith yelled out loud as Adam fucked her in one of the most degrading positions that she hated but for some reason loved it with him. Adam then grabbed her sensitive horns and brought her head back making her scream out loud in bliss, eyes rolling to the back of her head as she came around his cock “Don’t cum yet I gotta stay strong and show her why I'm the man”. Adam thought growling a bit, never stopping his thrusting into her pussy which prolonged her orgasm. They fucked for who knows how long but they didn’t care. Lilith lost count on how many orgasms that her lover has given her but now she wants something else from him something really important as Adam drove himself into her in the mating press “Fuck I'm going to cum soon Lilith I better pull out”. Adam groaned out. 

 

“No!” Lilith yelled to him as she proceeded to wrap her legs around his waist to keep him inside “Dont you fucking dare you hung bastard cum inside of me paint my insides with your hot fertile seed!” Lilith moaned out loud. “Fuck it if you want it then take it” Adam yelled as his thrusting increased he can feel his balls twitching ready to paint her insides white with his seed but he feels Lilith wrapped her arms around his neck and put her lips right to his ear and lustfully say “ Put a baby inside of me your so much better than him” Which made Adam yell out a roar of pleasure and triumph as he proceeded to breach her cervix and cum inside of her making Lilith bite his neck as she proceeds to have one of the biggest orgasms of her entire existence that would surely wake up everybody in hell, heaven, and earth if she screamed her lungs out know hence why she is biting his neck “OH FUCK YES KEEP CUMMING INSIDE ME BABY I DON”T CARE HOW LONG IT TAKES OH MY HELL JUST BY THE FEELING OF MY STOMACH HIS CUM IS PROBABLY MAKING ME LOOK 9 MONTHS PREGNANT, OHH FUCKKKK!”. She thought while having another orgasm. 

 

After a while Adam pulled out of her taking in the sight of her bulged belly as his cum leaks out of her pussy “ Oh fuck yeah im definitely the man”. Adam thought a smirk appeared on his face. He then feels her hands on his face and he looks at her and she was practically glowing in his eyes as they proceeded to kiss each other not in an animalistic way or tongue just a normal kiss. After a short time of their kissing they separated and Lilith no longer looked pregnant. He proceeds to put on his pants while Lilith layed on the grass just looking at him lovingly. “You ready to go Lil” Adam asked while picking her up bridal style. Lilith looked at him and could see he was ready to protect himself if she was just playing with his feelings which made her upset not at him but at herself. At that moment she made a vow to herself “ I will never hurt him again and I think I know some ways I could help him more”. Lilith thought a Cheshire smile and perverted giggle appeared inside of herself but on the outside she gave him a smile “Yes I am but”. She then whispers into his ear he then proceeds to nod and put her down and both proceed in a blink of an eye using their speed grab who was watching them from the bushes “Ahhh Alastor nice to see you”. Lilith said while Adam was glaring daggers at the demonic fuck who was watching them “Ahh queen Lilith I can…”. “No you cannot explain Alastor”. Lilith interrupted but then she smiled sweetly at him which made Alastor sweat with fear “Let's make a deal, radio demon”. Lilith ordered not asked. 

 

“Ohh fuck” Alastor thought. 

 

“ I can't wait to tell that fucking asshat clown Lucifuck that I stole his wife during the end of the extermination and we meet up to talk about how many sinful fucks we killed and rub it in face”. Adam thought grinning about it and letting out a bark of a laugh as he saw Lilith bind Alastor with a deal “He is going be our slave for a bit you don't mind him coming with us do you Adam”. Lilith asked him “Not at all Lil” he replied. 

 

With these words Adam’s afterlife was going to change for the better and Lucifer is going to regret the day he was created but that’s a chapter for another day.

Notes:

Leave kudos, comments, or bookmark it to let me know you enjoyed it and want to see more of it and thanks again for reading my story and yes, I teased three women who will have a taste of the Adam experience you probably already know one of them, but I want to see if you guys can guess the other two.

Ohh and the reason Charlie and Lucifer weren't there was because Charlie was out with her "Friends" and Lucifer was busy with something "cough cough, obsession with ducks and building them in his room cough cough"