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Lin Qiushi didn’t know if he believed it, but Ruan Nanzhu had always told him that there was something special about him.
As a consequence of his gift of superhuman sight, Ruan Nanzhu said he saw everybody surrounded by a light proportionate to how well they adapted to the doors, and Lin Qiushi glowed with the brightest light he had ever seen. Even in the first door, he pointed out, when the weightless Ruan Nanzhu he’d been carrying through the snow-filled fields had turned out to be that female ghost, Lin Qiushi hadn’t panicked like the other newcomers—only logically considered the problem and escaped safe and sound from one threat after the next.
Ruan Nanzhu could be merciless in his assessment of people. Some people were just better suited for survival inside the doors than others, he’d say. There were people like Cheng Qianli, who practiced three nights a week watching horror movies alone but couldn’t overcome their true nature. And there were people like Lin Qiushi, who couldn’t be jump-scared for the life of them, and might even laugh if you tried.
By now, Lin Qiushi had been through nine doors and could probably consider himself a veteran of ghosts and horrors alongside Ruan Nanzhu himself. He’d known the risks would be higher upon entering the tenth door, but he would be entering it with Ruan Nanzhu. What couldn’t they face down together, when they joined hands?
He hadn’t foreseen that nearly losing Ruan Nanzhu would give him the greatest fright of his life.
When he saw Ruan Nanzhu walk out of that hallway, unharmed except for the circular red mark burned into his wrist, he should have felt relieved. But having genuinely believed that Ruan Nanzhu was doomed—and having even started to make vicious calculations as to who in this room, including himself, he would trade for Ruan Nanzhu—in the intervening hours, something in Lin Qiushi’s mind had cracked and turned to ice, and what came out of his mouth instead was: “Don’t you dare fucking talk to me.”
There was no emotion in his voice, nothing at all to suggest how he felt except for the words themselves, and Ruan Nanzhu must have either not clocked the intensity of his rage or chosen to ignore it because he said: “Ah, Linlin, what’s gotten into you? Aren’t you happy to see me?”
And he’d flashed his irresistible smile. Lin Qiushi had had to restrain himself from punching his face, because even though Ruan Nanzhu was slightly smaller than him the man could fight, which was exactly what the eleven remaining people inside the door wanted to see. A nice juicy piece of theater to crown what they knew was very likely to be the last days of their lives. He wasn’t going to give it to them.
“Linlin, my wrist hurts,” tried Ruan Nanzhu again, during a lull in the conversation while they were discussing the possibility of there being a second informant. He pushed up his sleeve to expose the angry red wound, and a few people sitting near him around the table involuntarily grimaced. “Will you help me bandage it up?”
“Good. Let it hurt,” replied Lin Qiushi without turning his head.
That shut him up for the rest of the evening, until Lin Qiushi, who had emerged as the obvious leader of the group during Ruan Nanzhu’s temporary absence, finally called the debate and told everyone to return to their rooms.
The two of them had been sharing a room with Liang Miye, but she backed off swiftly after getting a whiff of the atmosphere between them. “I’ll leave you two alone, then,” she said, looking expectantly at Lin Qiushi for some further acknowledgement or information. When none was forthcoming, she ducked out of the room to find her own place to spend the night.
As soon as they were alone, Lin Qiushi turned his back to Ruan Nanzhu and started to undress for sleep. Ordinarily Ruan Nanzhu would have been eyeing him as he did so, but today he seemed fittingly chastised. It wasn’t to the extent that he couldn’t still be called shameless, but Lin Qiushi could tell he was holding himself back.
“Linlin,” Ruan Nanzhu started again.
“Don’t call me that.” Lin Qiushi flicked off the lights.
“Then what am I supposed to call you? You’re my Linlin.” Ruan Nanzhu located him in the dark and sat down at the edge of their bed, probing around the rumpled covers with his hands. “Will you let me come into bed with you tonight?”
“No.” Lin Qiushi dodged him and, snatching his pillow, clambered over onto the other bed which had previously been used by Liang Miye. “Sleep by yourself. Good night.”
He lay stewing quietly, wide eyes staring up at the ceiling, mind still whirling with anxiety and fury. Despite all the dangers he had encountered in the previous doors, Lin Qiushi had never truly been scared for his life; he took it for granted that he and Ruan Nanzhu would always outwit the others and find a way out. If he wasn’t willing to consider a world without Ruan Nanzhu, why would he expect Ruan Nanzhu to do so? He understood why Ruan Nanzhu had made the choice that he did. It didn’t mean that he was ready to forgive him.
After some time, he heard footsteps quietly crossing the room and the rustling of covers as Ruan Nanzhu climbed into bed next to him. “Qiushi, don’t be mad. I was wrong.”
“I can’t believe you lied to me,” he said, still facing away from him.
Ruan Nanzhu wrapped his arms around Lin Qiushi’s unmoving shoulders. “I won’t do it again, I promise. Let me make it up to you right now. What can I do for you? Are you hungry? Can I make you noodles? Or do you want…” His fingers reached across and danced down Lin Qiushi’s exposed chest, an invitation.
“Ruan Nanzhu, how can you even think about that at a time like this?” he accused, springing up on one elbow. “The Hako Onna’s chests are right here!” The corners of their room were stacked five high with mostly unopened chests, and who knew what—or who—might be inside them.
“I can’t help it,” said Ruan Nanzhu, “you were so hot earlier when you…” He swallowed, as if he’d thought better of what he’d been about to say. “When you took charge of the entire room back there. I’ve never seen my Linlin act like that before.”
When Lin Qiushi didn’t push him away as quickly as he could have, Ruan Nanzhu took the opening to tuck his head in and press his lips to his neck. Damn it. Lin Qiushi should never have revealed to him that he was into this. The feeling was exquisite; Ruan Nanzhu didn’t speak but continued kissing his neck with the utmost devotion and care. It was just like Ruan Nanzhu to use his knowledge of Lin Qiushi against him in this moment. He was glad it was dark so that Ruan Nanzhu couldn’t see the heat on his face.
“You’re just doing this to distract me, aren’t you? It’s not going to work.”
“You like it, though, don’t you?” said Ruan Nanzhu as he continued to nip at the skin there, filling Lin Qiushi’s head with an intoxicating warmth.
Yes, you idiot, I like you, that’s why I don’t want you to fucking die!
He let Ruan Nanzhu reach down and slide his boxers off, then grip his cock in his fingers and direct it towards his lips. How shameful, the way his body responded to Ruan Nanzhu even though he wanted to stay still, to pull back, to give Ruan Nanzhu the silent treatment and make him feel the pangs of a night spent alone. He’d wanted Ruan Nanzhu to feel the pain of his absence, the same way Lin Qiushi had been made to feel his—how promptly those hopes had been dashed.
“I can’t believe you’re doing this. I’m still mad at you, you know that?”
“Don’t be mad, Linlin,” he murmured, putting on his best sweet tone that was even a step up from what he had been using the entire night, “just relax and let me serve you as payment for my wrongs.”
Ruan Nanzhu was very skilled at using his mouth. For all that could be said about the annoying man, Lin Qiushi couldn’t deny that. He knew just the right way to lick and suck to give Lin Qiushi a thrum of pleasure before pulling away. He knew that if he looked down, he’d see Ruan Nanzhu’s intense eyes, staring back at him shamelessly as he licked his way up and down his cock, wordlessly urging him towards his arousal.
He didn’t dare look down.
In fact he didn’t have to, because he could feel and hear everything without needing to see what was happening. The way Ruan Nanzhu came at it from different angles made Lin Qiushi anticipate where his tongue would land next, aching for more. It was almost too much—the moments of expectancy when Ruan Nanzhu came up for air before pressing his mouth back down, followed by shivers of pleasure as he licked around the underside of his cock. His enhanced hearing amplified the sounds of Ruan Nanzhu’s mouth against his wet cock, and their heavy breaths as both grew more excited.
Fortunately it was dark. He didn’t want to think about how good Ruan Nanzhu looked doing this. Just the thought of it made the blood rush to that part of his body and made Lin Qiushi feel dizzy. It was useless trying to hold onto his anger—he felt it fizzling away from his grasp even now.
Why worry about what had almost been, when he could feel Ruan Nanzhu’s warmth right here?
Ruan Nanzhu slipped his hands from around the base of his cock and took the whole thing in his mouth, giving Lin Qiushi the feeling of being completely enveloped by soothing warmth, and leading a sigh of contentment to escape his mouth.
It was a good thing Ruan Nanzhu couldn’t talk with his mouth full like this, because if he’d been able to, he’d definitely be using that sharp tongue of his to make Lin Qiushi even more embarrassed than he already was. He could practically hear it in his mind. Look at you, so impatient for me. You were so cold to me moments earlier! What’s gotten into you, Linlin?
You, obviously! You brought me to this point. He was too good! How could it be fair?
Ruan Nanzhu swirled his tongue around the most sensitive part of the head and Lin Qiushi’s body went limp, his nerves crying out with the need for release.
Only one person on earth could be this shameless, and that was Ruan Nanzhu. No one else would have the audacity to fool his lover into letting him sacrifice his life in the doors, then plead for forgiveness with this kind of behavior. What a degenerate!
Finally, Ruan Nanzhu seemed to sense from the tense stretch of his muscles and the lost haze in his eyes that he was close. He became unrelenting, using his mouth and his hands in concert to vigorously spur him on towards his release. Lin Qiushi came in his mouth, thrusting repeatedly and closing his eyes to the sustained bursts of pleasure, trying only halfheartedly to stifle the sounds of his enthusiasm.
Ah, fuck. It had been good. Ruan Nanzhu was never going to let him live this down. It had been worth it, though.
Ruan Nanzhu swallowed dutifully and wiped his mouth with his injured wrist, and Lin Qiushi caught the glint of satisfaction in his eyes.
“Was that good, Lin Qiushi? Did you like that?”
He couldn’t let Ruan Nanzhu know. He had to maintain the act.
Ruan Nanzhu shifted in an almost uncomfortable way on the bed, bringing Lin Qiushi’s attention to the hardness that was pressing through his own pants. “Am I going to have to finish myself off, or would you be willing to help me out?” Even now, he wasn’t embarrassed at all—how could that be? His expression was as perfectly collected as it was both inside and outside the doors, with even the hint of a smile.
But Lin Qiushi had already turned his back to him and was exhibiting the slow, even breaths of the sleeping.