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It was a lovely day at Beacon today. A nice spring Saturday morning that saw plenty of huntsmen in training lounging about lazily across the academy. The sun was shining, warm rays casting golden light across the vibrant green blades of grass, the few scattered clouds white and fluffy like balls of cotton, and song birds chirping their soothing melodies carried by a gentle breeze. In the middle of all that, beneath an old oak at the courtyard sat two students, side by side leaning against one another: A petite teenage girl with short dark red hair and crimson cloak wrapped around her slender shoulders. Her silver eyes darted across the pages of a magazine, the current issue of ‘Huntsmen Hunks Weekly’. To her right sat a tall blonde boy with wide shoulders and toned muscles whose blue eyes were fixed on his scroll, browsing the various Grimmstagram tho- swimwear models. Ruby and Jaune were basically spending this beautiful morning simply enjoying each other’s company on the day that marked one month since they started officially dating.
The redhead sighed wistfully as she turned the page to the fold-in. ‘That guy is packing some heavy weaponry…’ she thought to herself. Likewise, Jaune scrolled away through the enterprising female models, mentally rating them based on their respective… attributes. Of course none could compare to his girlfriend currently sitting right next to him, one stray glance away from becoming very upset.
Thus the young couple whiled the hours away, each in their own little bubble. However, as beautiful an image as that may be, it was not meant to last. You see, Ruby had just read an advertisement for a pistol that fires classic gunpowder rounds that would be a perfect compliment to Jaune’s equally classic sword and shield combo. Thus, she turned to her boyfriend with her face full of excitement, only to catch him staring a little bit too intently at a certain Jasmine Nigiri’s massive… anyway, that bikini was way too small, and Jaune should not be examining her. Ruby narrowed her silver eyes, an idea of how she would punish her perverted boyfriend materialising in her mind (whilst discreetly hiding her magazine). A mischievous smirk tugged the corner of her mouth. She decided it’s time to play the blonde a little bit.
“Jaune?”
Immediately, Jaune’s scroll snapped shut.
“I wasn’t doing anything!” he blurted out, face reddening.
The redhead’s eyes narrowed further in suspicion.
“Hmm. Tell me, If I died and got reincarnated as a worm, would you still love me?”
Jaune blinked. Several times.
“What?” he asked.
Ruby pouted, “Jaune you know I hate repeating things, I asked if you would still love me as a worm.”
The huntsman in training stared at his girlfriend with confusion in his eyes.
“Ruby, you know I love you, why are you asking me that?”
“Because I need to know Jaune, you love me now, but what if I changed way too much? What if I became a worm?”
Ruby’s silver eyes looked pleadingly at Jaune, begging him for an answer. The right answer.
The answer that Jaune refused to give.
“Ruby,” he started, finally pocketing his scroll, “You’re never going to become a worm, so I don’t see why I have to entertain this ridiculous hypothetical.”
Oh it’s on now.
“So you’re saying that your love does not transcend my physical form? That you consider our timeless relationship to be ridiculous?” the petite girl whimpered.
The boy started sweating.
“Babe please…”
“You don’t get to call me that, not until you give me an answer.”
“Ok Ruby, you’re being unreasonable. If you got reincarnated as a worm, how am I even supposed to recognise you? Let alone communicate with you?” Jaune’s voice was increasing in pitch. Why was his girlfriend doing this today of all days? He was having such a great morning. It was the weekend, the sun was out, and his favourite Onlyf- er, content creator, had just released a new set of videos. Life was great.
And then she decided to become a psycho.
“Am I to understand, Jaune, that you would not even try to find me if I changed into a worm?” Ruby said far too menacingly.
At that point, Jaune knew he had a few options open to him. He could either humour the deceptively cute girl to maybe shut her up, go to Vale and buy her some strawberry boba and placate her that way, or keep deflecting until she gets bored or he finds an ally to assist him.
Naturally, in his hubris he chose the secret fourth option, which was signing his own death sentence.
“Ruby, you’re acting crazy and need to calm the fuck down. It’s not even that time of the month yet”
Silence.
The breeze stopped blowing, the birds stopped chirping, and the sun hid behind the clouds.
Unnatural, hellish silence.
The redhead’s mouth stretched into what could only be described as a slasher smile, her eyes shone not with mirth, but rather malice.
“What did you just say?” she asked slowly in a creepily melodic tone.
Jaune gulped nervously, sweat dripping from his brows and eyes darting around him, searching for any possible escape route. He found none.
“I, uhh… you’re l-looking, umm, hazy? And t-that, erm, I n-need to c-cool down? A bit? It’s getting kinda warm here, heh.” He tried feebly. Ruby’s right eye started twitching.
“Umm, Rubes?” Jaune started to panic. They’d only been dating for a month, but he knew her for a full semester by now, and he knew that the usually kind and gentle soul that cries when she runs out of cookies becomes an actual psychopath when she’s mad.
And she was very mad at him.
“You know Jaune, I started all of this because I caught you looking at those whores on your scroll,” she pushed her magazine further where he wouldn’t see it, “and then you say that to me?” She leaned in closer to his face, prompting Jaune to lean back in turn. “I’ve half a mind to show you what I can really do to people that piss me off. Remember Cardin?”
Jaune did remember Cardin. He remembered how the bully tried to pick on Ruby during their overnight leader’s bootcamp, and how he ended up with a broken arm and a fractured pride. He was also fully aware that with him, Ruby had access to more… delicate parts that she could break.
Given the circumstances (caused in part by an aversion to testicular pain), the blonde boy opted to cut his losses. He sighed before turning to the girl he loved.
“Ruby, I’m sorry. I would never stop loving you, even if you became a worm. I would turn Remnant upside down if it meant being with you again.” he declared, while looking his best friend in the eyes.
Ruby’s grin widened as a blush spread across her face.
“Awww, Jaune! I knew you’d come around eventually.” she giggled.
The boy frowned, “You can be really scary sometimes…” he muttered.
And then she started laughing. Jaune looked at his girlfriend incredulously as she rocked back and forth with mirth, barely able to breathe.
“Ruby what the fuck?”
“Oh- oh Gods! Your f-face Jaune, It was priceless! I got you real good didn’t I?” she struggled to speak in between gasps of air. Her oblivious boyfriend sat there, dumbfounded.
“I’m sorry Rubes but I’m not following, what is going on?”
Ruby calmed down just enough to pull out the magazine she’s been hiding throughout. “Jaune, you beautiful idiot, why would I be mad at you for looking at Grimmstagram models when you literally bought this magazine for me?” she managed while still giggling madly.
Jaune sighed again.
“I’ll treat you to lunch if you never tell the others about it.”
“And that’s why I love you.” She tittered with a smile.
Thus the sun emerged again, and it continued to be a lovely day at Beacon Academy.