Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Donghyuck glared at his screen, hoping the message he just read was a prank.

yo hyuck

sungchan told me about this party downtown

i went with him

sorry i completely forgot about you

Donghyuck was about to type a scathing reply when more messages popped up on his screen.

ahhhhh the last sentence sounded so bad

but pls it’s a huge event for us

good for networking

can you go back home alone 🥺

An emoji. Jisung never used emojis except when he was being serious, the irony of it all. Donghyuck sighed and set his phone down on the floor where he was seated cross-legged, leaving him on read.

He had followed Jisung, as per his request, (which included a lot of pleading with Donghyuck and buying him three tubs of his favourite ice cream), to a photo shoot. The gig was at a building in the centre of the city, near the social hub of the working elites, but far away from the real hub of the younger folks—which was downtown. He had come down to the empty room when he dropped Jisung off on an upper floor, avoiding the crowded space. Now, as he sat alone in the poorly lit room, he wished he hadn’t left the house in the first place.

Donghyuck sighed and turned his attention back to the book he cradled on his thighs. It was a nineteenth century romance, set in the fields and estates of aristocratic England. He allowed himself to fall into another reality where he was filthy rich, with the confidence and pride of a peacock.

A few moments later, Donghyuck noticed a figure looming in front of him, partially blocking the meagre light coming from the lonely bulb hanging in the room. He didn’t bother looking up, hoping the person would pay him no mind and walk away.

He shifted uneasily in his position, his head still buried in his book, the music from his AirPods filling his head. His butt had gone numb from sitting on the cold hard floor for a long time, but there was nothing much he could do. He couldn’t bear sitting upstairs with the sea of too-good-looking men drowning him.

The looming figure trod closer. Donghyuck clutched his book more tightly. He still didn’t look up, his anxiety spiking up at the thought of a stranger speaking to him so unexpectedly. When the person stopped just short of him, Donghyuck began to lean forward and downwards, as if to physically jump into the green fields of his open book.

“Don’t move,” The figure spat out suddenly. Donghyuck froze at the sound of the voice, a deep rumble, hoarse enough to draw attention even from the imaginary lush hills of his book. Then, he heard them. Click. Click. Click.

“Can you raise your head slightly as before?” the voice asked. Donghyuck did as it said, as if he was being puppeteered.

More clicks.

Then they ceased.

Donghyuck dared to look up now. He slowly lifted his gaze from his book, meeting the stranger’s feet first. They were clad in worn down sneakers. His legs were covered up in a pair of baggy jeans, and he had a simple white shirt buried underneath a layer of a thick black jacket.

He couldn’t see the person clearly as he was backing the light, but he could take notice of his blue hair and the hefty camera he held. He was peering at it closely. The man looked away from its blinking screen for a moment and locked eyes with him. Donghyuck averted his gaze instantly, turning back to his book.

He moved closer—the stranger—crouching just by Donghyuck's left side. It was close enough for him to catch a whiff of the cedar of a perfume and a minty aftershave.

“May I?”

Donghyuck tore his eyes away from the book he was now feigning interest in, to steal another glance at him. He was holding his camera in one hand now, his left, as he raised his right hand up. It hovered near Donghyuck’s head.

Donghyuck stared at the hand blankly, then at him, before furrowing his eyebrows. The man did not wait to explain his question or get an answer, he slipped his hand into Donghyuck’s beanie and nudged it off.

Donghyuck parted his lips, a remark of both shock and chastisement forming on his tongue, which dissipated quickly when nimble fingers slipped into his hair. He closed his eyes as the fingers glided through his brown locks. The man worked with a definite pattern in mind, nudging all his hair forward and parting it in the middle, till Donghyuck felt the strands framing his face.

He stopped abruptly. Donghyuck shuddered at the loss, opening his eyes slowly to meet him lifting his camera right to his face. He heard another click before he could react further.

“Stay like that, don’t move,” the man whispered. He backed away a little as the clicks continued.

Donghyuck opened his eyes again fully when the sounds stopped. He drew his knees up, throwing his arms around them and laying his face sideways on their top. The man was studying something on the camera’s screen again, this time he was kneeling.

Donghyuck took the opportunity to gaze at him unabashedly. His face was all angles and planes, the sleek kind. As if the man could feel his eyes on him, he tilted his head upwards, matching Donghyuck’s gaze. Donghyuck almost gasped at the sparkle his eyes held.

“Are you one of them?” the man asked, turning a circular thing on the huge camera. Donghyuck watched as his fingers worked deftly, the blue veins against his pale skin twisting with every turn his hand made. “Whose are you?” the man pressed on in his silence.

“I’m not sure I understand?”

“Oh look, he speaks,” the man said, his mouth giving way to a quick smile that disappeared just as fast as it appeared. “Them upstairs, the models, which photographer do you belong to?”

“Oh. I’m not a model, I just came to—”

“Undiscovered,” he interjected. “Nice.” He moved closer to Donghyuck, studying his face without any form of hesitation or self restraint. “Always wanted to work with soft edges.”

Donghyuck let out a confused hum, to which the man placed his camera gently on the floor and brought one hand up. He moulded his palm to the side of Donghyuck’s face and repeated, “Soft edges.”

He gave Donghyuck a wink before patting his cheek and dropping his hands back down to lift his camera. A lock of blue hair fell as the man bent his head, and Donghyuck reached his hand up reflexively to tuck it behind his ear. The man startled at the gesture and looked back at him, before gracing him with a smile. He mouthed a thanks and turned his attention back down.

“What’s your name, Mr. non-model?” the man asked him.

“Donghyuck.”

“Hello Donghyuck, I’m Mark.” He stopped fidgeting with the camera and held his hand out to Donghyuck, who eyed it gingerly, before he allowed it to envelop his. It was a firm grip, unsurprising, and warm.

Mark did not release him immediately. Instead, he held on to the tip of his hand, examining it as he did so. “You have such pretty fingers.”

Donghyuck blushed at the compliment, snatching his hand back to hug himself. He buried his head in his cradled knees. His nose butted against the edge of his forgotten book and the dusty smell of aged paper brought him back to earth.

“Are you usually this shy?”

Donghyuck shook his hidden head. He heard the man chuckle and then some shuffling. The fragrance of the cedar was stronger now.

“Come on look up, I don’t bite,” he said softly. “Don’t you want to see the photos I just took of you?”

Donghyuck’s head emerged slowly, hiding his cheeks in the curve of his elbow.

“It’s ok,” he encouraged Donghyuck as he tugged on his elbow. Donghyuck’s arm gave way underneath the weak pressure and fell, revealing his face, his chin on his knee. Mark pinched his tinted cheeks and smiled.

“I love it when boys blush.”

Donghyuck coloured some more. “I’m sure you do,” he mumbled into the thick denim covering his knees. Mark simply raised an eyebrow and laughed.

“So, why are you here, Donghyuck? I assume you don’t usually venture out to random buildings on your own?”

“What d’you mean?”

“Come on,” Mark began with a small laugh, “I know social anxiety when I see one.”

Donghyuck raised his head and leaned back against the wall. “I’m here with my brother.”

“Is he a photographer too?”

Donghyuck hummed a negative.

“I take it he is one of the models upstairs,” Mark said, giving him a genuine smile. It lit his face up, softening his rather strong features. Donghyuck felt himself relaxing at his grin.

“Wanna come with me to the roof for a second?” Mark asked with a cautious tone. He was resting on his calves now, his hands cradling the camera on his lap. Donghyuck felt his eyes on him while he kept his on Mark’s camera. “Don’t worry it's just me. I wanna see your colour in natural light.”

“My colour? Why?”

Mark stared at him blankly for a moment before getting up from his knees. He held his hand out to Donghyuck. “Just, come on.”

Donghyuck grabbed his beanie and tucked his phone into his book, letting it serve as a bookmark, before reaching for Mark’s hand and allowing himself to be pulled up. He dusted the back of his pants and looked expectantly at him. With upturned lips, Mark whirled and gestured at Donghyuck to follow him.

Two corridors and four staircases and later, Donghyuck found himself face to face with a furnished roof. It had a nice view of the city, although the building wasn’t that high. Donghyuck weaselled through colourful chairs and tables with intriguing shapes to the edge, clutching on the railing as he peered down. The street below looked so far away and tiny, and Donghyuck stretched his hand out, as if to pinch it at the centre.

He heard someone laugh behind him. He spun, expecting it to be Mark, but was faced by another person. He stood almost two feet from him, hands pocketed in the front of a black hoodie, as he stared at Donghyuck.

“He’s there,” the new guy said, pointing his chin to the right, upon noticing Donghyuck’s creased forehead. Donghyuck turned towards the direction and saw Mark seated on one of the couches by the side. He had his phone to his ear, a displeased look on his face as he rambled into the receiver.

“Who are you?” the man asked him. He stopped chewing his gum and gave Donghyuck a fake smile, as if to lift the mood.

“Donghyuck.”

“I’m Chenle.”

Donghyuck nodded, turning back to Mark and wondering what the hell was going on.

“He’s gonna stay like that for at least half an hour or more,” Chenle said as he sauntered towards him. He stood beside Donghyuck and leaned his back against the railing. He brought one hand up to his head, running his fingers through the teal mess. Donghyuck could almost hear the crackling from his damaged strands and bit his lips to prevent laughing out.

“Ugh, I know my hair is fried, but can you at least be civil and pretend you can’t notice shit?”

Donghyuck gave in and cackled loudly, gripping the railing for support. Chenle’s lips downturned in faux sadness, before he joined Donghyuck in laughing.

“Hey.”

Donghyuck and Chenle turned in unison to face Mark, he was standing by them now, his phone still stuck to his ear.

“Something came up, I have to leave,” he told Donghyuck as he shot him an apologetic look. “You cool going home on your own? Or are you gonna wait for your brother?”

“I’ll go. The subway should be less crowded now,” Donghyuck replied. But Mark’s attention was back on his phone. He yelled a profanity to the receiver before stepping away from them again.

“I can give you a ride home if you want,” Chenle offered. Donghyuck watched as he retrieved a pair of sunglasses from the pocket of his hoodie and popped it on his face. The glasses hung low on his nose bridge and he ended up looking at Donghyuck with his naked eyes over the top frame.

“Thanks, but I don’t want to be a bother,” Donghyuck answered. He hoped Chenle would press him to ride with him. Dealing with one stranger was better than dealing with hundreds on the train home.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Chenle said with a click of his tongue. “It’s not like I have somewhere to be anyway.”

Donghyuck smiled in relief. He thanked Chenle once again, and the latter shrugged.

Mark was farther away from them now, still talking animatedly to the phone.

“He stays like that for hours sometimes,” Chenle said, scoffing slightly as he looked over at Mark. “It’s best to just leave him in his own world.”

He turned back to Donghyuck, pointing his thumb towards the door, and asked, “Ready?”

Donghyuck nodded as plastered another smile on his face, the opposite of what he was feeling inside.

🪔

Donghyuck trudged along the sidewalk, almost panting. He had decided he wanted to make dinner instead of ordering in for the tenth time that week. He had gone grocery shopping, having found out there was absolutely nothing to scrounge up in the kitchen.

He clutched his shopping totes tightly in his hands. Although his fingers burned red from the weight, he was in no hurry to get home. It was a nice evening. The air wasn’t too humid, the weather wasn’t too hot, the winds weren’t too strong. It was one of those perfect days for outdoor activities.

He was just by his apartment complex when he saw the now familiar head of blue hair. He felt his heart skip a bit as he approached him.

“I thought you’d never show,” Mark said. He was leaning on a white sports car, dressed in soft blue jeans and a black crew neck, a pair of dark shades pushed upwards into his hair. He eyed Donghyuck’s bags warily. “Those look heavy as fuck. D’you need some help?”

Donghyuck nodded without missing a beat. Mark pushed himself off the side of the car and took a few steps to meet him. Donghyuck sniffled as the hint of cedar touched his nostrils.

“Hi,” he puffed at Mark, as the latter relieved him of the tote in his left hand. “This way.” Donghyuck led him to the front stairs, before entering his code and opening the front door. “Do I need to ask how you got my address?” Donghyuck asked, looking over his shoulder at Mark as they entered the building.

“Chenle told me,” Mark replied, his tone ridden with bemusement.

“Ahhh.” Donghyuck got to the elevator and pressed the button leading up. “You could’ve gone up. I mean, my name is by the door.”

“Well, I did buzz your apartment. Someone told me to fuck off because, and I quote, ‘Donghyuck doesn’t have any friends.’”

Donghyuck made a mental note to kill his brother and filed it for later. He turned back to face Mark. “That’s Jisung, he’s just being careful.”

“Jisung, your model brother?”

“Yeah.”

Donghyuck heard a ding and turned his attention back to the rickety elevator. They climbed into it and took it to the fifth and final floor. Donghyuck knocked instead of using his keys, just to make Jisung get up from his bed to open the door. He opened it with a scowl as Donghyuck predicted, but soon exchanged it for a gaping mouth and widened eyes as he looked beyond Donghyuck.

“Mark Lee?” he shrieked, bringing his hand up to cover his mouth.

Donghyuck stepped aside, darting a glance between Mark and his brother in confusion, his quest for murder placed on a back burner. “Do you know him?” he asked Jisung.

“What do you mean do I know him? It’s Mark Lee,” Jisung screeched. He reached forward to poke Mark’s left shoulder, as if to confirm his presence. “How the fuck do you know Mark Lee?” He looked down at Mark’s hands and widened his eyes again as he turned to Donghyuck, “Why’s he helping you with your bags?”

“What a kind brother you are,” Donghyuck bit back. He walked past Jisung and motioned for Mark to do the same.

“Mark… Mr. Lee…? I’m so sorry for not letting you in, I had no idea…”

“Jisung fuck off,” Donghyuck interjected, waving his hand dismissively.

“But I need to ask him some questions. Like when is your next exhibit? What inspires you?” Jisung was hot on Mark’s trail , his lanky figure crowding the stuffed living area and kitchen.

“Jisung….”

“It’s alright,” Mark said as he watched the two brothers in amusement. “I can answer some questions on the agreement that no information will make it out. Deal?”

Jisung nodded his head vigorously in excitement.

Mark placed the bag he was carrying on the counter before leaning against it. “Shoot.”

“Have you found your next muse?” Jisung spat out immediately.

“Yes.”

Jisung’s eyebrows shot up to the heavens. “Who is it? Please tell me, I would not say a word,” he pleaded, pulling an invisible zipper over his lips shut.

“It’s someone you probably know.”

Jisung scrunched his face up in puzzlement.

“He’s in this room with us right now.”

Jisung stared at Mark blankly, still confused at his words.

Mark sighed. He pointed his left hand at Donghyuck in exasperation.

Jisung snorted. “Him? Donghyuck?”

Donghyuck, who had barely been following their conversation, looked up at the call of his name. He stopped abruptly, a tin of diced tomatoes in his left hand, and threw a glance at Jisung.

“What?” he called out uninterestedly.

“You’re his new muse?” Jisung asked rather than stated, pointing a finger at Mark, an incredulous look on his face.

Donghyuck’s head jolted backwards as he faced Mark. “I’m your what now?”

“Actually, that is why I am here today—” Mark began, before he was interrupted by Jisung.

“How did you find him? Seriously, he never leaves the house. And as a model? He’s so awkward…” Jisung trailed before composing himself. “Sorry Hyuck, I don’t mean it like that.”

Donghyuck shrugged him off and continued arranging the tins in the cabinets quietly. He avoided Jisung’s contrite eyes. There was a tense silence for about a minute before Donghyuck spoke, because none of it really made sense to him. Then, he laughed nervously and crossed his arms.

“I’m afraid I’m with Jisung on this, Mark. What d’you mean?”

Just as Mark was about to answer, his phone rang, a shrill noise in the otherwise quiet apartment. He held one hand up to excuse himself and strode into the living room. He stopped by a shelf, examining the figurines placed on the white wood as he spoke in hushed tones to the receiver.

“How did you meet him?” Jisung whispered loudly to Donghyuck. The latter brushed him off and resumed storing the groceries.

Jisung turned to watched Mark’s back as he spoke to the phone. “I can’t believe I can say I’ve met him, he’s so elusive.”

Donghyuck rolled his eyes. “What’s so great about him?”

“Oh Hyuck… He’s like this whiz at photography. Remember that exhibition I went to two years ago with Yangyang?”

“You mean the one that made you torture mum and dad to get you a camera, then you proceeded to terrorize us by taking pictures of everyone in the dark?”

“Yes!” Jisung shrieked, oblivious to Donghyuck’s mocking tone. “Mark captures these images… they really resonate with you when you see them. It’s like, if someone else took them, they would be called pervy? But for him, I don’t know, there’s just something—”

Mark cleared his throat behind him. Jisung froze in his stance before squeezing his face and stepping to his left. He opened a random cabinet and began rummaging in it. Donghyuck snickered when he caught Mark’s arched brows.

“Do go on,” he humoured Jisung with an amused tilt.

Jisung turned to face him, giving him the ghost of a smile, before scurrying out of the kitchen in embarrassment. Donghyuck turned his attention back to his spoils. He busied himself washing some iceberg lettuce underneath the tap.

“Muse, huh?” he asked quietly.

“I came here with a proposition.”

Donghyuck pierced the green leaves apart and placed them in the vegetable drainer. He began winding it slowly, watching as the leaves whirled from the circular motion.

Mark inched closer, standing opposite the island Donghyuck was working at. “Come to my studio, maybe that’ll convince you.”

“I’m not sure I’m what you’re looking for.” The lettuce was dry now. Donghyuck fished out a glass bowl from an upper cabinet and placed the leaves inside gingerly, laying the big spreads on top of each other.

Mark watched as Donghyuck’s hands moved with blatant experience. “Why don’t we try it and see, before you write it off?”

“I had no idea you were this big-shot photographer,” Donghyuck said, a rather weird and unintentional segue into Mark’s next question.

“Would you have done it if I was a struggling artist or something?” Mark japed, crossing his arms and leaning forward.

“Probably,” Donghyuck replied with honesty. “Lesser eyes on me.”

Mark hummed at the revelation. He rounded the counter slowly, till he was standing next to Donghyuck. He gripped him by the shoulders and twirled him till they were face to face.

“It’s just gonna be you, me and the camera when we’re shooting.”

“That’s not—”

“You don’t have to show your face publicly or do anything. Just you, me, and...” Mark ended his sentence by clicking an invisible camera.

Donghyuck tittered at his gesture.

“So, will you come on by?”

Donghyuck lowered his eyes, feeling caged by his rather piercing eyes. He nodded and turned back to his vegetables, handling the carrots this time.

“Awesome,” Mark said, patting his shoulder, before rubbing across his back. His hand fell to Donghyuck’s waist, in a near side hug. He tapped on it and squeezed lightly.

“Do you want to stay for dinner?” Donghyuck nearly croaked. He cleared his throat and repeated his question with what he hoped was a smoother voice. He tilted his head to the side slightly, peering at Mark from his peripheral.

“Nah, I’m afraid I can’t stay. I have an event that I’m probably late for,” he replied. He checked his watch as he spoke, as if to emphasize his point. He was still standing close to Donghyuck, his hand was still doing that thing to his waist. Donghyuck blinked rapidly as if to ward off the thoughts flooding his head.

“One month,” Mark announced suddenly.

“Huh?”

“One month,” he repeated. He twirled Donghyuck to face him again. This time, his hand crept into his hair, his fingers dancing in between the strands. “Grow it out and I will start the test shots in a month.”

“Is that when I’ll see you again?”

“You sound disappointed?” Mark asked, a teasing edge to his voice. “Do you want to see me earlier than that?”

Donghyuck lowered his gaze. He began threading his fingers.

“You can come by the studio any time you want, I usually work from there nowadays. Just text ahead so I know you’re coming.

“Oh, which reminds me,” Mark said as he fished a pen out of his back pocket. His eyes darted round the kitchen till they rested on the roll of paper towels. He tore one off and scribbled on it.

“Here’s my number,” he said, holding the soft piece out to Donghyuck. “Don’t throw it into the trash or some shit,” he added with a grin.

“Ok.” Donghyuck grabbed the tissue paper. He could feel Mark’s eyes on him as he worked the piece into a tiny square.

“So, got to go. See you later, yeah?” Mark patted his shoulder again. He waited for a few seconds before drawing closer and pecking Donghyuck’s cheek. He left his side almost immediately.

Donghyuck stood, frozen, an incoherent sound bubbling in his throat. He placed his hand on the cheek, blood rushing to his head at an alarming rate. By the time he turned, Mark had disappeared from the apartment like he had never been there.

🪔

It turned out Mark was indeed a hotshot photographer.

Donghyuck had waited two weeks to text him, following Jisung’s advice. He really didn’t know how to approach matters of having a crush, or whatever Jisung said Mark was to him, so he listened to his younger brother.

Jisung was partially right about him being friendless. He had acquaintances, colleagues if you count the office he worked part-time in, but not someone he could call on a random Saturday and hang out with. He was socially awkward, and painfully so.

When he was younger, he often fell into depressive states about his situation. He would venture out into groups on his own, trying to push down the bile rising in his throat and ignore the blood draining from his brain as he attempted talking to people. He always ended up stuttering, and they would look at him in annoyance or pity.

He stopped trying by the time he got to college, learning to live in his own small world, content in his solitude, with his annoying brother and even more annoying cousin, Yangyang, as his only friends.

It was hard catching Mark in the studio. He had projects, he told Donghyuck the first time he texted. And the next. And the next. This dragged on for over two months, before he was finally available.

Donghyuck woke up the morning of, feeling as giddy as he could be. He had a hot shower and headed to Jisung’s room, dragging him out of his bed into his own room to help him pick an outfit.

“Can’t you just put anything on? It’s not like it’s a date or something,” Jisung mumbled as he sat on Donghyuck’s bed, his eyes still groggy. He rubbed on them and yawned.

“I’ve done some research.”

“Stalking his website and instagram is not research,” Jisung snorted.

“It’s not stalking,” Donghyuck corrected, one finger up. “It’s research. Besides, he only posts his works, he doesn’t even show his face.”

“Yeah, I’m sure that made you really sad.”

“Well, yes,” Donghyuck agreed before clamping his mouth shut at Jisung’s raised eyebrow. “Ugh, fuck you. Just help me, please.”

Jisung got up and began rummaging in the closet. “You don’t have a lot of clothes.”

“I have nowhere to wear them to, so why waste money?”

“Hyuck…”

“Ok, fine, I’ll behave.”

Jisung grabbed a light olive band shirt and dangled it in Donghyuck’s face, Pink Floyd splattered on the front.

“Something dark…” Donghyuck said as he shook his head. “All his models always wear something dark,” Donghyuck explained at Jisung’s puzzled hum.

Jisung rolled his eyes and pulled out a darker shirt. This time the girls of TLC faced him.

“What?” Jisung asked, crossing his arms. “He doesn’t have women on his page?”

“No, it’s just… TLC?”

“You love this shirt!” Jisung screeched. “It looks good on you!”

“Yes, but let us go with something… darker?”

“No. You told me he said ‘soft edges’ when he saw you. So, stick to being yourself, that’s why he noticed you in the first place.” Jisung threw the shirt to Donghyuck’s shoulder before delving back into the closet.

“You’re awkward, and have a disturbing fixation on TLC,” he continued, sounding muffled. “You’re still obsessed with skinny jeans, even though it’s fucking 2023.” He reappeared with Donghyuck’s favourite pants. The fancy black jeans with carefully ripped fabric he wore whenever the situation felt just right.

“And for shoes, wear your Docs,” Jisung said. He was by the small table in Donghyuck’s room now, his hand deep in a drawer. By the time he turned, Donghyuck was halfway done dressing up.

“Oh. The look ended up being dark. I’m such a genius.” Jisung held one hand up to his mouth as he laughed while Donghyuck rolled his eyes. He closed the distance between them and handed Donghyuck his favourite silver necklace, the one that ran rather long that he had to double around his neck.

“I dig it,” Jisung said, nodding at Donghyuck’s hair. “It makes you look more mysterious.”

“It’s a pain in the butt though.” Donghyuck twisted the chain round his neck and brushed his fingers through his overgrown hair.

“Beauty is pain!”

Donghyuck rolled his eyes for the twentieth time that morning before ushering Jisung out of his room.

An hour later, after a lot of turning and twirling in front of the mirror and the lightest dab of pink tint on his lips, Donghyuck made his way out of the house. It was warm outside, and he was glad he didn’t bother with a jacket. He stopped and had a doughnut in a little pastry store by the corner, reapplying the pink tint to his lips afterwards, this time a bit thicker.

He took the subway to Mark’s studio, getting off and emerging on the street nearby, just like the last time he accompanied Jisung for his photo shoot. He headed for the basement of the building however, unlike the last time.

It was empty and hollow inside the basement. Mark hadn’t really specified the room he was to meet him, so Donghyuck wandered down the dark corridor, hoping to catch a glimpse of the blue haired man before Bigfoot or the clown from IT got to him first.

All the rooms were shut, darkened shadows flirting underneath, where the doors didn’t meet the floor. All but one. Red light filtered out of the open room by his right, an absurdity in the otherwise dimly lit space.

Donghyuck made his way into the dark room cautiously. It was creepy enough, the red lighting casting eerie shadows over the space, a faucet leaking incessantly in the background. Photos were hung on wires strung haphazardly across the room. He walked closer to view them, enticed by the shapes the figures made.

His mild curiosity was replaced with crippling intrigue when he was near enough. Young men, attractive by conventional standards, in contortions that at first appeared unachievable, but actually were actually basic poses enhanced by lights and shadows. Half a face buried in an upturned palm, a pair of lips intertwined with liquid dripping from their seams, a guy hugging himself, his bony fingers splayed on a rosy back. There were about fifty of these, each more interesting than the last.

But one struck him.

A dark room with a wooden bed, the white sheet drooping at the foot. There was a man underneath, with nothing but dark jeans on. He couldn’t really tell if the denim was dark blue or black, the saturation was down, the brightness was low. His spine was curved, his hand down his pants. One knee was aimed upwards, although limited by the bed frame above. His face was towards the viewer.

Donghyuck stared unflinchingly at him. There was something about his eyes, his matted black hair against his forehead, and the way his mouth hung open, like his mind was chasing something Donghyuck couldn’t see. His cheeks were tinged with pink, Donghyuck assumed it was a deliberate choice against the greys of the photo.

It was beautiful.

As Donghyuck raised a hand to the picture, enthralled by the composition it held, a voice called out from the corner of the room. He jumped in his skin at the sudden sound, stepping back from the hung photos instantly.

“You’re only allowed to look, not touch.”

Donghyuck’s eyes scoured the room for Mark, up to no avail. It was dark enough, only a frequent occupant would be able to weave their way through without needing more light. Donghyuck maintained his stance as he waited for him to speak again. When he didn’t, he stepped back to the pictures and raised his hand again, closer this time.

“Dude.”

The voice was clearer this time, deeper. Donghyuck twirled on his heels and gasped unwittingly, unprepared to see him lurking by the wall close to the door. He leaned against it, one sneakered foot pressed to the sturdy thing.

“Like what you see?” Mark called out teasingly. He rolled the sleeves of his jacket up and crossed his arms. Donghyuck let the drops leaking from the faucet answer the question. Mark pushed himself away from the wall and headed toward him, a casual sway in his stride. “I usually don’t like people coming in here.”

Mark stopped just short of him, close enough for Donghyuck to finally make shape of the angular face and round eyes he had grown accustomed to from his extensive research . They seemed to betray his appearance of doom, his eyes. They sparkled too much for a creepy vibe, which was what Donghyuck’s mind had aptly ascribed to him.

“D’you know you have really long legs,” he said as his eyes trailed Donghyuck’s body downwards. Donghyuck felt naked under his scrutinising gaze and took a step back, only for Mark to reach out and reel him back in by the elbow.

“Watch my babies,” he warned. Donghyuck raised his brows, to which Mark smiled. He pointed past his shoulders and upwards, to the items hanging. Donghyuck apologized and shuffled to his right, till he was no longer backing the lines.

Mark looked at him intently before speaking next. “Follow me.” He didn’t wait for assent before he turned towards the door and stepped out of the room. Donghyuck followed him. He led Donghyuck down the corridor, in the same direction Donghyuck had taken, stopping at the elevators.

“I want to take them now,” he blurted out suddenly as they waited.

Donghyuck looked at him in puzzlement.

“The test shots, I want to take them now.”

All Donghyuck could manage was an Oh before Mark pulled him into the now open elevator and pressed a button for a higher floor.

“The hair turned out better than I thought,” Mark said as he stood in front of him. He was studying Donghyuck intently again, one hand on his chin. “Are these your natural waves?”

Donghyuck nodded almost absentmindedly, still reeling from the eccentric way the encounter was proceeding. The lighting in the elevator was better, and he could see Mark clearer. He had on a white shirt underneath the brown jacket. His pants this time were brown too, a stiffer material than the jacket. Donghyuck suspected twill.

Mark turned just as they stopped moving, perfect timing, like he knew the exact duration it took to reach the floor they were now on. When Donghyuck got out of the elevator, he concluded Mark most likely did know the exact timing.

It was very bright, a stark contrast from the pit of hell they had just emerged from. His name was scribbled on a large glass door that seemed to run for ages. Mark Lee. Donghyuck tried not to feel intimidated by the framed photos of celebrities on the wall as they walked down the hall.

He stopped by a room on their left, knocking twice on the door. It opened for them after a few seconds. Donghyuck was faced with Chenle, who immediately brushed Mark off and grinned at him.

“Fuck, you look good,” Chenle gasped as he pulled him into the room by his wrist. “Yo, Jeno! Come look at Mark’s new toy.”

“Chenle…” Mark began, but was soon interrupted by a louder voice yodelling.

A sturdier man appeared out of nowhere, a bag of chips in his hands. Donghyuck presumed he was Jeno. He nudged Chenle away and stood directly in front of Donghyuck, running an appraising look over his frame.

“He doesn’t fit your aesthetic,” Jeno said bluntly, popping a chip into his mouth and munching loudly. Donghyuck wondered how someone could be so loud even with their mouth closed, and suspected Jeno was doing it deliberately. Donghyuck’s eyes flitted to his black hair pulled up in a low ponytail, then back down to his strong jaw.

Chenle had joined Jeno now in the staring. “Before he had shorter hair,” Chenle explained to Jeno, pointing at Donghyuck’s head, “He looked too young, but with it longer now, I think he would fit.”

Jeno squinted his eyes before nodding in approval. “It would be better as black too. Not this brown nonsense,” he said as he ruffled Donghyuck’s hair.

Donghyuck stepped back from him just as Mark stepped forward, so in tune with each other that it appeared as if Mark was catching him in his arms. Mark kept his hand on Donghyuck’s waist, like he did in his kitchen, and nudged him away from the duo in front of him.

“Hey, where are you going? Muse police is not done!” Jeno called out, but Mark did not answer him. He flipped him off, to which Donghyuck laughed quietly.

Mark led him to another part of the room, shielded from the rest by white curtains that hung from the high ceiling. It was very bright, but it was lit from the sun outside, rather than the fluorescent lights of the building. There were blown out pictures hanging from the stark white walls. Donghyuck recognized some models from the red room in the basement, although they were in different poses now.

He saw him again, the man under the bed. He was still shirtless. He was sitting on a backward chair now, gripping the base where the back of the chair met its seat tightly with both hands. If someone looked long enough, it would seem like he was fucking the chair. Donghyuck stared at the taut muscles of his lean biceps and clutched his own arms reflexively.

“What do you think of when you see them?” Mark asked after a while, when Donghyuck had absorbed most of the photos on the wall. “First thing that comes to your mind.”

Donghyuck walked to the boy he was so intrigued in, staring at his eyes. “They are rather provocative? But not in a bad way.”

“Hmmm?”

“Lewd?”

Mark laughed.

“I’m not close to the correct answer, am I?” Donghyuck asked sheepishly.

“There’s no correct answer, I don’t think art has one.” He headed towards Donghyuck and stood beside him.

“When I first started taking pictures, I wanted to capture basic beautiful things only. Nice sky, pretty flowers, random gorgeous girl outside. That was until I realized that I was getting nowhere.

“The person behind the camera creates a narrative.” Mark pressed on hand against the glass panel separating the blown up canvas from the rest of the world, and Donghyuck watched as two silver bands on his forefinger glinted in the daylight. “I decided I wanted to capture the very essence of humankind. Mark turned sideways to face him. “Do you know what that is?”

“Love?”

Mark shook his head, a small smile on his lips. “Sex.”

Donghyuck’s neck coloured at his answer and he tore his gaze away from him.

Mark went on. “Many have this weird relationship with sex. Some are too obsessed, some view it as something shameful, some think it is a sin if you have it with multiple people… but I want people to view it for what it really is.”

“And what’s that?”

“It’s just sex. It’s this beautiful, natural thing. The sole reason all of us are on this planet today is because two people chose to create us from it. I’ll admit there may be power struggles and injustices in some cases, but for the most part, I believe we shouldn’t be averse to embracing the subject openly.”

Donghyuck nodded to nothing in particular, before he ambled to the next picture. It was of an older woman. She was sitting by the stairs leading to a battered down front door, a cigarette in one hand and a pair of startling red heels in the other. Her mascara was smudged, like she had been crying, but she was smiling, teeth piercing white against the darker background.

“What do you notice about most of these models?” Mark questioned. He was beside him again.

“Beautiful?”

“Dig deeper.”

“Confident? Alluring? Assertive in a peculiar manner?”

Mark hummed. “What about their physiognomy?”

Donghyuck stepped back and observed all the photos in his near vicinity. “Sharp?”

Mark hummed assent. “That’s where you come in.”

With furrowed brows, Donghyuck faced him. “I do?”

“In the media, anytime a bold statement is to be made, people often go for stronger, sharper features, as you can see,” Mark gestured to the walls to emphasize his point. “People have convinced themselves that softer features breed innocence, like fucking cherubs and shit.

“I want to try to combat that, with you.”

Donghyuck snickered unintentionally, which caused Mark’s forehead to crease.

“I think you’re overestimating what I look like,” Donghyuck stated rather frankly. He glued his eyes to the guy in the dark jeans on the wall again.

“You don’t think you’re beautiful?”

“How am I supposed to respond to that without sounding like a self-loathing bastard or a pompous jerk?”

Mark grinned at his words and Donghyuck let go of the tension building up in his chest a little.

“Just tell me the truth.”

Donghyuck sighed. “I think I’m ok, pretty enough when I make an effort, but it stops there. I’m not drop dead gorgeous like… them.” Donghyuck said, waving his hand at the walls clad with the probably the most attractive people he has ever laid his eyes on.

“Beauty is just a perception.”

“Perception doesn’t mask the truth.”

Mark chuckled quietly, as if laughing at a private joke. “There’s nothing such as true beauty when it comes to physicalities. That crap only exists within, or whatever those gurus say to placate people’s minds.”

Mark’s smile widened when he noticed that Donghyuck could not counter his point. “For the record, I think you’re very beautiful, perception or not.”

Donghyuck turned away from him to hide the blush creeping up on his cheeks. “You’re just saying that to get me to agree to model for you.”

“Is it working?” Mark teased from behind him.

“No.”

Mark changed his position till he was facing Donghyuck, the stupid smile still on his face.

“I am being serious. You do look beautiful, especially today. Did you dress up just for me?”

Donghyuck lowered his head, letting his reddened cheeks answer his words.

Mark reached one hand out to him, hooking his index finger in one of his belt loops, before yanking him closer. The sudden movement startled Donghyuck, causing his hands to fly to Mark’s chest. He giggled at Donghyuck’s fright. His hands scaled down Donghyuck’s hips before slipping into the back pockets of his jeans. His thumbs hung outside and tapped randomly on Donghyuck, while the rest of his fingers remained buried in the pockets.

“I like it, just so you know,” Mark whispered, a cool minty breath fanning Donghyuck’s face. “The effort, more than the clothes. Though I love them too.”

Donghyuck nodded, gaze still lowered. His eyes were on his hands, palms flat against the soft cotton shirt covering Mark’s chest.

“Come on, it’s me, look up.”

Donghyuck did as he said, raising his head to face a nose just inches short of his. He started to back away at the close proximity, but Mark held on firmly to him, bringing one hand out of his pocket and wrapping his arm around his waist.

“I don’t want you to be shy with me,” he said softly. He brought the other hand up to the side of Donghyuck’s face, fingertips grazing his ear softly as he thumbed the sensitive skin underneath his eye and just above his cheek. “Yeah?”

Donghyuck waited a moment, as if to contemplate his decision, before repeating, “Yeah.” He closed his eyes, relishing the caress. Mark's thumb edged upwards, gently trailing on the curve line of his lashes. Donghyuck giggled at the tingling sensation.

“Pretty.”

Donghyuck sighed.

“Come on, accept the compliment or I won’t let you go.”

Donghyuck debated keeping quiet for all eternity, just so Mark would continue holding him. But his stupid cautious brain and all the proper manners it stored had him murmuring a thank you to Mark almost immediately.

“Wanna test some shots with me now?” Mark asked. His hand dropped from Donghyuck’s waist and scouted for his wrist, before holding on to his hand. He pulled Donghyuck gently away from the hung pictures and to an emptier spot of the room.

🪔

It had been weeks since Mark had taken test shots of him, and Donghyuck felt they were going nowhere. No, he was not listening to voices in his head, he simply overhead Mark telling his assistant one day when they thought he had left the room.

“He’s too strung up,” Mark had complained, “like he looks pretty, but we don’t want that do we?”

“We want fuckable,” the assistant had replied. Donghyuck had left the adjoining room immediately, wishing he hadn’t overheard the conversation.

Today was no different than the rest. Mark sat, exhausted, by the window sill at the set they were at.

“Let’s end it for today,” he called out to them.

Winter, the assistant, a small twiggy girl with the brightest blonde hair he had ever seen, scowled in protest. “We always end early, with nothing to shoot,” she grumbled as she packed up the cameras and the cosmetics strung across a cluttered table.

Mark gave her a wry smile. He walked over to Donghyuck, seated on a bed, complete with the softest sheets he had ever laid his back on. Seriously, he considered swiping the sheets when the shoot was completed. That is, if he ever made it that far.

“Wanna have dinner with me? Jeno and Chenle saved us a table at my favourite place.”

Donghyuck nodded. He couldn’t meet his eyes, scared he had failed him yet again. He did not clean the makeup off his face, it was light enough anyways. He changed out of the shoot’s outfits and back into his own clothes. He followed Mark gingerly afterwards. They headed to the restaurant on foot, it was a couple of minutes from the studio.

Jeno and Chenle had already ordered by the time they got there. Chenle spoke highly of the salmon platter with the arugula salad and feta cheese, and Donghyuck told him he was sure he would love it. He sat next to Mark on one side of the table, facing Jeno, and Chenle who sat beside him.

“So, how’s the shoot going?” Jeno asked once they were settled in, full plates and glasses in their fronts and all.

There was silence for a moment. An outsider would attribute it to them stuffing their faces with food, but Donghyuck knew Mark was stalling.

“We’ve been having some trouble with the pictures,” he finally confessed. Donghyuck could not see him, as he kept his eyes trained on his plate, but he could feel Mark’s eyes boring holes into his face.

“Why so?” Jeno asked. He spared some of the salmon on his plate and slid it gently from his fork into his mouth with his teeth. “He looks too soft? I thought the long hair would combat that?”

“It has more to do with the expressions,” Mark clarified. He turned away from Donghyuck and lifted his glass to his lips.

For the next couple minutes no one spoke, the clinging and clanging of the utensils against stoic white plates filled the silence. Donghyuck found himself stalling, breaking off a piece of the hard boiled egg on his platter, before nibbling on it.

“Have you ever fucked a man before?”

Donghyuck choked, widened eyes on Jeno. He heard Chenle snort as he leaned back in his seat, bringing his hand to his chin, savouring in the humiliating inquisition Jeno began. Donghyuck lowered his gaze to the pink liquid in his tall glass as he mumbled a negative, his ears reddening.

“Ok,” Jeno continued, unfazed by his discomfort. “Have you ever been fucked by a man before.”

Donghyuck felt the red tinge spreading to his cheeks as he began needling the fingers on his lap. It was nauseating now, the aroma of the honey glazed salmon he was elated to try. He shook his head sheepishly, feeling the curls from the failed photoshoot brush against his coloured cheeks. He snuck a glance at Chenle. He was watching him with palpable intrigue, his lips lifted at one corner.

“Girl…?” Mark prodded from beside him, hope ringing in his tone. He sighed when Donghyuck graced them with another head shake, wringing his fingers even more harshly together.

Chenle spoke next. He shifted his eyes to Mark, an amused lift to his voice. “You have a virgin as your fucking muse, dude.” He laughed afterwards, hitting Jeno’s arm as he threw his head back. Although Chenle was not really mocking him, Donghyuck felt scorched.

He turned to Donghyuck, the laugh still on his lips. “You know most of the looks Mark wants from you are fucked out faces right?” He put both of his lower arms on the table, bracketing his plate in between them. “That’s why this hasn’t been working so far, you can’t give what you don’t have.”

Donghyuck stared blankly at him, an O forming on his lips. He had figured it out by now, but hearing Chenle say it really cemented his thoughts. His interest returned to his drink and the lemon rind that hung on the rim.

Donghyuck stole a glance at Jeno, the cause of his current predicament. He was smirking, his eyes locked on Donghyuck’s figure, ridden with mischief. Donghyuck dropped his eyes back to his plate. He brought one hand up to toy with the fish. The tender meat fell apart with each poke of his fork, trapped steam creeping out of the previously hidden pockets.

The silence now was awkward. While Chenle kept eating his meal noiselessly, Mark was frozen in his position, as though in deep thought. That was until he spoke,

“We have to rectify that problem tonight.”

Donghyuck’s brows shot up, turning abruptly to face him. He was sure his face was expressionless, but Mark continued speaking, as if to elucidate his point.

“We’re getting you laid tonight.”

“How are you gonna do that?” Chenle asked with a full mouth hidden by his curved palm. “You gonna wingman him into getting a stranger to do him?”

“No man, I’ve got to go to Aunt Irene’s tonight, remember?”

“I’m not babysitting your toy into getting fucked, dude.”

“He can’t go alone, he looks like he’s gonna disintegrate any time you leave his side,” Jeno scoffed. Donghyuck glared at him.

Mark didn’t seem to pay attention to Jeno’s remark. Instead, he twirled to face Donghyuck. “You’ve done other stuff right? Like just not sex sex?”

They stared at him expectantly.

Donghyuck had never really been put on the spot on matters regarding this, so he lied. “Yes,” he croaked, a burning sensation in his brain about how horrible this poorly formulated plan was going to end up.

“Uhm, with this short notice he’s gonna have to top,” Chenle continued talking to Mark, shutting Donghyuck out of the conversation again. Jeno guffawed.

“You want him to bottom?” Chenle half-yelled. Jeno laughed some more, downing his drink. “Do you know how to bottom?” Chenle asked as he swerved back to Donghyuck.

Donghyuck lied again.

“See!” Mark exclaimed, still confident about the plan. “He knows the deal. He was probably just waiting for the right person or some cheesy shit these shy boys usually say.”

Chenle scrunched his nose in agreement and crossed his arms. “It’s Friday at Laud’s, there will be no way he doesn’t get someone.”

Donghyuck listened as they discussed his prospects for the night he hadn’t even agreed to. He knew he was going to have to do it anyway, he just didn’t understand why he felt obliged to do so. He watched the three of them, or rather, Mark, as he spoke. The sharp edges of his hairline, the wavy, longer locks in the middle, layered on top of each other till they melted off into a fade at the sides.

Would he like his hair pulled during sex? Donghyuck wondered. Would he rather lingering touches as fingers swarm from in between the shorter strands to the lengthier ones?

Donghyuck's eyes wandered to Mark’s lips, opening and closing with much vigour. He thought about how they would feel against his. Soft and pillowy, yet rough around the edges, just as Mark was to him? How he had decided he liked his men now.

He averted his eyes just as Mark turned.

“You haven’t even taken a bite,” Mark said to Donghyuck, nodding his head to his plate as a smile crept on his lips. “Not even one month on the job and you’ve absorbed the model mentality. Fucking insane.”

Donghyuck returned his smile with a shy one. He hadn’t developed the model disease or whatever he had said. He couldn’t really eat when the man he desperately wanted to fuck him was discussing his solving his celibacy like a math problem, and coming up with a wrong solution at that.

🪔

Laud was a gay bar as much as the sky was pink. It had been infiltrated by girls who wanted to feel safe, which was fine by most, until some of them decided that their boyfriends could tag along. The owners, seeing the amount of money they raked in catering to a general audience, had done nothing to prevent the inevitable end. Now, it stood as the hot spot for all nightcrawlers.

This wasn’t Donghyuck’s first time coming here. Doyoung, one of his college seniors who had taken a liking to him, had his birthday party last year in one of the private suites. All he remembered from that night was puking his guts out from all the alcohol and lying flat on his face on the backseat of Doyoung’s car as he drove him home.

This was, however, the first time he was on the main floor of the club without a fake ID tucked into his wallet. Purple neon lights streaked all the edges he could lay his eyes on, burning holes into his retina. The music blasted from surrounding speakers, and none of the carousers seemed to mind the way it tore into their eardrums and mushed their brains.

It was not like there was more mushing to do, Donghyuck thought to himself. Everyone was either too drunk or too high. Perhaps they just looked it and were really having fun, Donghyuck couldn’t really tell. He could relate to none of the three possibilities.

Mark hadn’t even bothered to drop him off, he had raced to see his snooty old aunt. Chenle hung close to him by the bar, despite his earlier opposition. Donghyuck clutched his drink tightly, a fizzy orange concoction he knew nothing of, but had been convinced was the night’s special by the bartender. She had thrown a wink at him, and Jeno had joked that she could be his one night stand, to which Chenle punched his arm hard enough to get a screech.

“He’ll soon be back,” Chenle reassured Donghyuck, sensing his uneasiness. Donghyuck spared him a glance before nodding. “Just for the record, I think you look absolutely beautiful tonight, so relax, we’ll get you someone.”

“Thank you,” Donghyuck replied shyly, his jittery fingers grasping his glass tightly. Just as Chenle was about to speak again, Jeno reappeared. He was trailed by a taller man who was smiling softly.

“Look who I found!” he yelled over the bar noise, his speech a little bit slurry from too many drinks crammed inside his body in too little time. “This is Jaehyun, he should be called Zeus or something I tell ya!”

Chenle rolled his eyes as he pried Jeno’s wandering hands from the guy and tucked him to his side. He nudged Donghyuck forward with his other hand, and Donghyuck gripped his drink tightly to prevent spilling the rapidly warming liquid.

“Hi, nice to meet you,” the man said as he smiled. Donghyuck noticed his dimples, two dips in his face, like someone pinched two holes in a perfectly kneaded dough. He had kind eyes, Donghyuck always felt safe in kind eyes, so he stretched his hand out and told him his name. The man accepted the shake with an even wider smile, the dips deepening.

Donghyuck thought the night might not end up being bad after all.

“So, how do you know these two rascals?” Jaehyun asked, sinking his eyes into Donghyuck’s. He took a sip of his own drink, something brown in a fatter glass. Donghyuck’s eye caught on a gold band on his middle finger and fixated on it.

“We’re friends,” Chenle answered for him, nudging Donghyuck further forward before adding, “And he has a crush on you.”

Donghyuck startled and turned his head sharply, arching his brows at Chenle. As he moved to speak, Chenle laughed and gave him a wink before scurrying away with Jeno.

“You alright?” Jaehyun called from behind him.

Donghyuck turned back to him and gave him an apologetic smile. “I don’t know what he’s saying, I—”

“It’s ok, you don’t have to say anything. Jeno kinda explained your situation to me.”

Donghyuck gulped in air. He wondered what Jeno had told Jaehyun, he really didn’t want his virgin status to be known by people, especially someone as hot as Jaehyun. He contemplated downing the orange concoction he was holding, but thought against it, the warm liquid sitting unattractively in the glass.

“What did he tell you?” Donghyuck finally got the courage to ask.

“That you want to get laid?”

“Oh,” Donghyuck said, relief washing over him. “Was that all?”

“Was there supposed to be more?” Jaehyun asked. His tone was light and teasing, and Donghyuck relaxed once again.

Donghyuck finally raised the orange drink to his lips and took a sip. He regretted it almost instantly, scrunching his face as he dragged his tongue against his upper front teeth. Jaehyun laughed at his displeasure. He reached for Donghyuck’s glass, gently nudging his fingers off the stem, before fully unhanding it from him.

“You’re so cute,” he told Donghyuck. He downed the orange poison in one go. Donghyuck watched as the liquid travelled down his throat, his Adam’s apple bobbing. He found himself licking his lips unwittingly. Jaehyun caught his stare and smiled. He leaned forward, almost caging Donghyuck, as he dropped the empty glass on the counter behind him.

“So fucking cute,” he reiterated and stepped forward, closing the distance between them. He brought his hand to Donghyuck’s jaw and tilted his head up, waiting a moment for any resistance, before laying his lips on Donghyuck when he got none.

Jaehyun kissed him slowly but hungrily, he didn’t know how to describe it. He didn’t also know how to describe the feeling erupting in him when he parted his lips and Jaehyun’s tongue started prodding inside his mouth. Jaehyun’s arm surrounded Donghyuck and pulled him upwards until he was on his toes, to better slot their mouths together.

Donghyuck could feel the coldness of Jaehyun’s glass that held the brown liquor against the thin linen shirt on his back. He could feel Jaehyun’s abs as he pressed closer to him, his hands gripping tightly to Jaehyun’s sides, as the taller man kept kissing him until he ran out of air in his lungs.

Donghyuck pulled away, taking a sharp breath in. Jaehyun’s arm still remained round his back, his other hand planted firmly under his jaw. His eyes were darker, much more sensual than he already was.

“Wanna get outta here?” Jaehyun asked, his breath hot against Donghyuck’s cheek. Donghyuck nodded.

Jaehyun smiled. He released Donghyuck to gulp back the rest of his drink, before taking his hand and leading him out of the club.

🪔

Donghyuck didn’t know how Jaehyun could remain patient under these circumstances.

They had walked to Jaehyun’s apartment, which was only a couple of blocks from the bustling night scene. Jaehyun had slipped his tongue back into his mouth as soon as they were behind closed doors, locking him in his arms again as Donghyuck began to swoon over the sensations.

They had found their way into the bedroom after a lot of bumping and tripping. Although Donghyuck was sure Jaehyun knew his way around his own apartment, he suspected a preoccupation took a better hold of his mind.

“Are you prepped?” Jaehyun asked as he tore off Donghyuck’s shirt. The latter froze in his position on Jaehyun’s lap.

Donghyuck breathed heavily before replying solemnly, dropping his hands from Jaehyun’s neck. “Uhm, I don’t… this is my first time?”

With a crinkled forehead, Jaehyun asked. “One night stand?”

“Yes,” Donghyuck chuckled nervously, “But not only that.”

“Bottoming?”

Donghyuck lowered his eyes and began treading his fingers.

“Oh… oh, shit,” Jaehyun trailed.

Donghyuck kept his eyes down, watching how Jaehyun’s lower torso fell and rose with every breath he took. He wanted to poke at the abdomen hidden behind the tight black tank so much, but guessed this wasn’t the right time to do so.

“I guess it’s alright. I could show you how to, uhm, get ready?” Jaehyun said, laughing nervously. He grabbed Donghyuck’s threaded fingers, prying them away gently, before placing them back on his neck. He leaned forward to kiss him again, a short one this time. But as he pulled away, Donghyuck shook his head and dropped his hands.

“You don’t want to go through with this do you?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Is it sex in general or just me?”

Donghyuck stopped needling his fingers and finally succumbed to the urge. He poked Jaehyun’s abdomen lightly and kept his fingers steady on him. He trailed two fingers upwards, walking them on Jaehyun’s sturdy torso like a pair of legs. He looked up at him.

It wasn’t that Donghyuck didn’t find him attractive, it was that Jaehyun just wasn’t him. He did not have a smirk lurking around the corner of his lips that tethered on the border of boyish and creepy. Or big brown eyes kept hooded under lowered eyelids that he had been obsessed with lately.

“You have another person in mind.” Jaehyun grabbed the hand creeping up his chest and lowered it to his side. Donghyuck exhaled and shuffled till he was finally off Jaehyun’s thighs and seated beside him.

Jaehyun sighed. “Please don’t tell me it’s one of those doofuses we just left at the club,” he said airily, trying to lift the mood.

Donghyuck laughed and hummed a negative, scrunching his face in mock disdain.

“Wanna talk about it?”

“Not really,” Donghyuck replied. “I’m not sure Mark would ever like me like that…”

“Wait, it’s Mark? That’s the biggest doofus of all!”

Donghyuck ignored his jest and widened his eyes. “You know Mark?”

“Yeah, we grew up together, with Jeno and Chenle.”

“With Jeno and Chenle?” Donghyuck repeated incredulously. He simply couldn’t see a world where the man seated beside him grew up well-adjusted, while Jeno and Chenle turned out like… that.

Jaehyun snorted. “I guess it is hard to believe.” He turned sideways to face Donghyuck. “Talk to him, I’m sure he’ll understand.”

Donghyuck shook his head vigorously. He was sure all his perfectly arranged curls were unruly now. He raised one hand to his hair and pulled a lock down before setting it free. He watched as it bounced back immediately.

Jaehyun stayed silent for a minute, deep in thought, before getting up from the bed. He grabbed Donghyuck’s shirt from the floor and offered it to him. Donghyuck put it back on without a question, standing up afterwards. He guessed it was time to leave, nothing was going to happen tonight. He mentally began to prepare on how he would take the subway home, hoping it wasn’t full by this time of the night.

“Let me take you to him.”

Donghyuck started and peered blankly at Jaehyun. “To whom?” he asked stupidly.

Jaehyun furrowed his eyebrows. “Mark of course, who else?”

🪔

Thirty minutes later, Donghyuck was standing in front of Mark’s door, with Jaehyun by his side. It was a sturdy wood, most likely of oak, and painted blue, against the creams of the outer walls of the apartment.

Mark opened the door with his phone glued to his face as usual. He dropped the call upon seeing Donghyuck, a questioning look on his face. He stepped aside to let them in, but Jaehyun waved him off, saying he was retiring for the night, before shoving Donghyuck in. Donghyuck lunged forward, gripping Mark’s arm to stabilize himself, and the both of them almost stumbled to the floor, save for the wall nearby. Donghyuck got a hold of himself and stood upright, dusting his hands by his sides as he chuckled nervously.

“Is everything alright?” Mark asked as he led him inside, past the reception area and into the living room.

Donghyuck hummed. He toed quietly behind him, his shoes exchanged for a pair of fuzzy slippers that chipped on Mark’s creepy facade.

“So, why are you here?” Mark was not facing him as he asked the question. He was elbow deep in a lower cupboard in the kitchen. “Gotcha,” he cried as his hand emerged clutching a large brown box. “I have been looking for these little shits forever,” he expantiated.

Donghyuck watched as the white letters which read Cocoa Puffs turned sideways as Mark poured the brown bits into a grey bowl.

“Want some?”

Donghyuck nodded. Mark fished another bowl from an upper cabinet this time, and poured some out for him. He brought out a red carton of milk from the silver fridge behind him and was about to pour some out, before stopping in his tracks.

“Regular milk ok? I don’t have oats and other whatnots…”

“It’s fine. Actually, may I do that?”

“Be my guest.” Mark set the carton down and waited for Donghyuck to come to his side. He watched as Donghyuck poured some milk into his bowl. “Damn, that is like three spoons.”

“I don’t like it soggy.”

Mark shrugged and poured a bucket load into his. He grinned at Donghyuck as he returned the milk. “I like mine soggy,” he said as he stuck his tongue out and wagged it.

Donghyuck was so taken aback by the act he remained speechless for a while, creasing his brows at Mark, before he finally let out a chuckle. He followed Mark to the living room, cradling his bowl in one hand, and the spoon he had been handed in the other.

Mark sat down on the couch, a shaggy beige thing. He looked up when he saw Donghyuck hovering and patted the space beside him. Donghyuck joined him, sitting cross legged as Mark did, close enough that their knees touched with the most minute movement. Mark did not seem to mind. He dug into his cereal immediately, holding his bowl up with one hand.

“Wanna watch something?”

Donghyuck stopped to look at Mark, a spoonful of cereal midway to his mouth, and shook his head.

“Well I do,” Mark said. He balanced the bowl precariously on one knee, before digging in between the crevices of the couch and procuring a remote control. He turned on the tv and opened the Disney+ app, before selecting Spiderman: No Way Home from his Recently watched.

“Have you seen this?” he asked Donghyuck behind a mouthful of cereal.

Donghyuck shook his head.

“Hey come on, use your words.”

Donghyuck pouted, stirring the little milk he had in his bowl into the heap of the sugary cereal. “It is a monosyllabic word. No. What do you get from that?”

“Well, for starters, I do like hearing your voice.”

Donghyuck rolled his eyes.

“Two: it doesn’t have to be short. You can talk more. For example, tell me why you haven’t seen this movie when literally everyone our age has.”

“I dunno, I don’t fancy him?”

Mark gasped so loudly Donghyuck nearly jumped in fright.

“Take that back. Wait, you know what, nevermind. All pretty boys get to have a flaw, I have accepted this fact a long time ago.”

Donghyuck’s cheeks heated up at his words. He turned back to his bowl, spooning the now viscous mess into his mouth, as if to hide his floundering heart. Mark did not say anything else to him, his eyes were glued to the screen when the movie started. It was silent, except for the clicking of their utensils.

Almost midway into the movie and its unbelievable plot, Mark paused it suddenly, turning to Donghyuck. “What happened tonight? It’s like we just glossed over that. Why were you with Jaehyun?”

“I met him at the club.”

“Ok…? Why did he bring you here, then leave?” Mark prodded on. Just as Donghyuck was about to reply, he held one hand up and continued speaking. “Speaking of the club, aren’t you supposed to be up to something?”

“I was.”

Mark raised his brows. “Really? That was pretty fast… I mean… wait this doesn’t make sense. How did you find Jaehyun afterwards?” Mark crinkled his forehead and widened his eyes. “Don’t tell me your first time was in a bathroom stall or a car.”

“No. We went back to his place,” Donghyuck replied, hesitantly. “Oh for God’s sake it was Jaehyun,” he revealed with lifted hands upon seeing the puzzled look Mark bore.

“What?” Mark screeched. Donghyuck searched his face, hoping to find a hint of something. Jealousy, anger, resentment. But all Mark did was laugh erratically, throwing his head to the back of the chair.

“Please tell me it was good at least.”

“We… I didn’t go through with it.”

Mark sat up at that, solemnity creeping on his face. “Oh?”

Donghyuck spared him a glance before looking down at his now empty hands, his bowl set on the floor beside him. He considered confessing to Mark like Jaehyun suggested earlier on, but he couldn’t find the words to use. That, and he was deathly afraid that Mark would reject him. He thought about the relationship they had now, blossoming into a friendship of some sort, and decided against it.

He threaded his fingers together as he spoke. “I don’t think I am ready.”

“Fuck. I didn’t even think of that when we were talking at dinner. I’m sorry, Hyuck. I don’t mean to push you into doing something you’re not comfortable with.”

Donghyuck nodded to his hand, his fingers still dancing with each other.

“Oh, come here,” Mark said as he reached out to drag him nearer by his arm. Donghyuck slid towards him until he collided with his side. Mark hugged him, a full one. Donghyuck did not smell the cedar this time around, Mark smelled more of fresh linen and winter candied apples.

Donghyuck hugged him back, not letting go, even when Mark turned back to the tv and continued his movie.

🪔

Donghyuck felt Mark was growing frustrated by the minute, although he refused to show it.

They were back at the studio, on the same bed. This time Donghyuck was half naked, only clad in a pair of jeans. His hair had been curled again. This time Mark told Winter to ditch the eyeliner and just give him lots of blush. It was pink this time, the blush. The jeans were also a lighter colour, more sky blue than navy.

After a couple of directions and clicks and he knew were futile, Donghyuck lay still on the bed as Mark stepped away from the camera and ran his hands through his hair. Mark paced the room, one hand on his chin, as he stole random looks at Donghyuck. The latter began to tense up, afraid Mark might finally acknowledge he wasn’t useful to him and give up on him altogether.

Mark stopped his pacing suddenly, turning to Winter as he spoke. “Why don’t you take your lunch now.”

“Lunch?” she repeated in confusion.

“Yes, lunch, or whatever they call those breaks. Take an hour, whatever.”

Winter's eyes darted to Donghyuck, before finally settling back on Mark. “You’re going to shoot him without me, ain’t you?”

Mark crossed his arms against his chest as he sauntered towards her. Donghyuck heard them whispering for a couple of minutes before Winter grabbed her bag and stormed off. He walked back to one of the camera stands afterwards, unfrazzled by her antics. He unhooked one of the cameras and began toying with it. He approached the bed when he was done and climbed onto it, kneeling by Donghyuck’s foot, camera on his lap.

“Assistants, am I right?” he joked as he looked at Donghyuck. Donghyuck gave him an unsure laugh.

“Do you touch yourself?” Mark asked the startling question with such a calm demeanour, Donghyuck could do nothing but blink in shock. “Like, you get horny don’t you? Do you ever mastubate?” he elucidated, as if he needed to.

“Yes,” Donghyuck replied.

“What do you usually do?”

Donghyuck cleared his throat, looking cautiously at Mark before responding. “Uhm… The basics?”

Mark chuckled. “There are several basics.” He shifted on the bed till he was kneeling upright, one leg in between Donghyuck’s. “Nipple play, autoerotic asphyxiation—”

Donghyuck’s eyes widened just as the corners of Mark’s lips turned up.

“So I take it you really just do the usual, which is limited to jerking off?”

Donghyuck nodded.

Mark leaned forward, dropping the camera on the bed, and began to unbuckle Donghyuck’s belt. “Can I take this off?” He waited for Donghyuck’s nod before he slipped his fingers into the top of his jeans and slid them off his legs, underwear and all. Donghyuck gasped as his skin met the colder air. Mark winced and shot him an apologetic look before returning to his previous position by Donghyuck. He reached down the bedside, grabbed the bottle of olive oil and began to coat his right hand with it.

Donghyuck’s eyes darted between his fast glistening hand and his face. “Am I shooting a nude?” he asked, his words coming out in spurts.

Mark laughed. “You’re in no way ready for that.” He edged closer to Donghyuck on his knees, one leg still in between him, before he asked his next question.

“Hyuck, I’m gonna finger you right now. Do I have your permission?”

Donghyuck felt his chest tighten as many emotions washed through him. He lowered his gaze from Mark as brought his hands to his stomach and began needling his fingers. He tried not to think how very naked he was, and how close Mark was to him right now, watching him intently.

“Speechless,” Mark said softly.

Donghyuck looked up as he furrowed his eyebrows.

“You play with your fingers when you don’t know what to say, or when you think you shouldn’t say what you want to say.”

Donghyuck looked at his fingers, the little traitors nestled on his belly, and brought them down immediately, hiding his hands underneath his back. Mark laughed at his absurdity. He shifted in his position, forcing a more serious look onto his face.

“I need to do this,” he told Donghyuck frankly. “You need to loosen up.”

Donghyuck’s eyes darted everywhere but Mark. He noticed the two huge screens on the table behind the set and the two chairs set up there. The camera stands just a foot before them. Another table with cosmetic tubes, brushes and bottles strewn over.

“Hyuck?”

“Is it the same reason why you wanted me to go out last night? To loosen up?” Donghyuck asked, voice barely above a whisper. Mark nodded. Donghyuck looked at him when he next spoke. “I’m sorry for letting you down.”

“You didn’t let me down, I—”

“You can do it.”

Mark raised a brow at the interjection but welcomed it. He moved his other knee over, until he was fully in between Donghyuck’s legs. “Can you raise your… Yes, like that.” Mark smiled at him reassuringly.

Donghyuck released his hands from their imprisonment underneath him, and laid them by his side.

“At first you wouldn’t really feel anything,” Mark began as he slipped one finger into him. Donghyuck nodded as if to confirm his statement.

Mark moved his finger sideways, as if to determine the width of the area he was intruding, before moving it forwards and backwards. He was right, Donghyuck didn’t really feel anything.

Expect the overwhelming urge to sit up, grab Mark by the shoulders, and smash his lips against his. He closed his eyes.

“Then it’s going to feel a bit weird.” Mark was slipping a second finger in now. Donghyuck felt a stretch, it burned, but not so much. It was a nice burn. He brought his hands up and drummed his fingers on his thighs incessantly.

Mark was doing that width thing again, except this time he was stretching his two fingers apart inside him. Donghyuck could almost sense how tight his own rim was by the pressure.

“Then it starts to feel real good.”

Mark did not have to tell Donghyuck this, because he let out his first moan as the former spoke. The level of Donghyuck’s exposure began to sink into his head, alongside the extent of what Mark was really doing to him. He shut his eyes even tighter, as nerves he didn’t know he had awakened.

When Mark added another finger, Donghyuck’s hands had fallen from his thighs and were clutching the sheets. His breathing was heavier now, laden with want and pleasure.

“Open your eyes, Hyuck.”

Donghyuck shook his head.

“Come on, I told you I don’t want you to feel shy with me.”

Donghyuck took a few breaths to stabilize, before opening his eyes slowly. He didn’t look at Mark, but focused his vision on one of his thighs instead.

Mark didn’t press him to look at him. Instead he asked, “How does it feel?”

“Good.”

“Yeah? What are you thinking of right now?”

Kissing you. Donghyuck remained silent.

Mark kissed the top of his knee before leaning forward. He widened his stance, his thighs so close to the back of Donghyuck’s, that any further movement would have Mark pressed flush against him.

Mark lowered himself till he rested on his left elbow by Donghyuck’s head. “I know how weird this must be under the circumstances.” He looked directly at Donghyuck, as if searching his eyes for answers. “I could kiss you right now, it would make this feel better, but I don’t want to ruin your makeup.”

Donghyuck whimpered, but it wasn’t because of what Mark was saying.

“I guess we found it,” Mark said with a chuckle as he began to stab at the spot repeatedly.

Donghyuck whimpered again. His hands flew up to grab Mark, clutching to his back as he dug his fingers into the soft cotton of his shirt. He felt his legs begin to turn to jelly, before the sensation spread upwards till it reached his fingertips.

“You’re doing great,” Mark whispered. He lowered his head and kissed the base of Donghyuck’s neck and his chest. He straightened up, and Donghyuck whined at the loss of his warmth.

Mark paid him no attention. He palmed Donghyuck’s dick and tilted it till it was facing him, before he began to hit Donghyuck’s prostate again.

Donghyuck’s gasps came quicker and quicker, he had no control over his body anymore. He arched his back as the waves in his body began to climb, taking him up hills he never knew of. He spluttered, closing his eyes and moaning Mark’s name as he succumbed wholly to the pleasure, reaching his climax.

He came crashing down afterwards, his skin reddened, his nerves buzzing, his body tingling and shaking from the stimulation. He felt like he had been placed on a cloud after battling with lightning, and was now floating back down, softly, gently.

He took his breaths through parted lips, calming his heart slowly. He dared to open his eyes now.

Mark was standing above him, his camera to his face as he clicked almost erratically. Donghyuck wanted to raise his hand to him, tell him he wasn’t clothed yet, but his arms were still like jelly. He felt something heavy on his lower torso, and realized Mark had thrown part of the white sheets over him.

Donghyuck lifted his gaze back up to Mark, but his eyes stopped at his shirt. It was splattered with his cum.

🪔

Donghyuck gazed at the blown up picture of him back at Mark’s studio. He was on the wall behind the white curtains now. Mark had hung him next to the dark jeans underneath the bed guy.

“I’m so going to tell mom,” Jisung snorted beside Donghyuck.

Donghyuck rolled his eyes for what seemed like the hundredth time that day. “You signed an NDA to get into this room. Nothing gets out until the exhibit.”

“But it’s mom,” Jisung squeaked. “She deserves to know her little Hyuckie has turned into a… sex symbol?”

Donghyuck turned to glare at him.

“Sorry. Sex provocateur?”

“I’m going to kill you once we get back home, just so you know.”

“You tell me that every time, yet here I am, still standing.” Jisung turned and stood with arms akimbo, cocking an eyebrow at Donghyuck. Donghyuck smacked his arm just to wipe the stupid grin on his face.

“Don’t be violent to me! Once you become famous, I’ll do a tell-all about your evil side.”

“Famous? Dream on.”

“Oh come on. All those shoots Mark has been having you do must amount to something.”

“Most of them are test shots,” Donghyuck explained. “Some brands also shoot numerous ads at once just to pick the best. I’m very much sure no one will pick me for a long time.”

“I doubt it,” Jisung said resolutely.

Donghyuck studied his brother for about a minute before speaking. “Why?”

“Dude!” Jisung exclaimed in exasperation, tilting his head to the wall of photos. “I know I am your brother and all, but you look so fucking hot.”

Donghyuck tried to bite back a smile at Jisung’s words, but failed woefully.

“Oh my God stop blushing, you are making it weird,” Jisung whined, scrunching his nose.

“I’m not blushing!” Donghyuck hissed and covered his cheeks.

“Nuh-huh, you are. You’re as bright as you get when Mark talks to you.”

“Jisung!” Donghyuck lunged forward to grab him, but his brother was quick, darting out of his near grasp. He laughed then pouted at Donghyuck, making horrid smooching noises.

“I fucking hate you.”

“Donghyuck and Mark sitting in the tree, K-I-S-S-I… Ow!” Jisung yelped as Donghyuck finally caught him and pinched his forearm. He rubbed on the sore spot and scowled at Donghyuck before flipping him off and disappearing behind the curtains.

Donghyuck resumed studying the walls of pictures. His gaze rested on his photo first, before settling on the dark jeans guy. His waist was incredibly small. Donghyuck patted his stomach reflexively. He tugged his shirt to the side and bunched up the excess fabric. He looked down at his waist. He released the now rumpled black shirt with a sigh.

When Donghyuck got back home that night, he threw out all the tubs of ice cream he had stashed in the freezer.

The next day, his tin of cookies followed.

🪔

“Have you ever tried Brizzly’s bear claw?” Mark asked suddenly.

They were at his house, and had been indoors for most of the day, hanging and doing absolutely nothing. The tv was on, an episode of SpongeBob ran on the screen.

“They add these chopped walnuts and cream cheese glaze over the danish. It tastes so amazing. You have to try it.” Mark continued eagerly.

Donghyuck looked up from his phone and nodded.

“Ok let’s go.”

“Now?” Donghyuck asked in puzzlement. “It’s near midnight.”

“It’s on the pier. They close late. Come on, let's go.”

Donghyuck got up and trudged after Mark, not even bothering to throw on his jacket on his black tshirt. He got into his car just as quietly. Mark was jittery as he drove, his eyes darting here and there, as they maintained a conversation based on nothing in particular.

“Ok, I don’t want you to freak out,” Mark began when he stopped by the pier. It was dark outside, the night was devoid of a moon, and most of the lighting came from the street lamps spaced so far apart from each other.

Mark rounded the car to get to Donghyuck’s side. He opened the door and held his hand out. Donghyuck took it and stepped out of the car, bewildered at the grin Mark was spotting on his face.

“Close your eyes,” Mark instructed. There was a certain giddiness to his tone that Donghyuck had never really heard. He did as he said, amidst Mark’s repetitions of ‘No peeking.’ Mark tugged him forward by his sleeve, guiding him gently as they walked for a few minutes, before coming to a halt. Donghyuck heard the chatterings that seemed far off before better now, and assumed they were finally on the pier.

“Ok. You are going to open your eyes on the count of five, and I want you to look up.”

“All of this for a bear claw?”

“Just do as I say.”

Donghyuck nodded, eager to see the gobsmacking food Mark was so excited to show him. Mark started the countdown, taking his time when he reached three, until Donghyuck groaned in frustration. He chuckled and completed it.

Donghyuck’s eyes flew open upon hearing one. He tilted his head upwards and gasped inaudibly as he saw it, his body frozen in its stance.

White and black, the curve of his back as he sat, supported by one palm against the floor, the length of his neck as he bent his head backwards to look up at the camera, the glass bottle in his other hand, host of the blue liquid he was promoting.

Tous Les Jours, the font underneath him read, followed by the Dior.

“Are you playing a sick joke on me? Is this a prank,” he managed to say weakly, as he continued staring at the huge billboard before him.

Mark guffawed loudly, like he had been holding his laughter in for a million years. “You don’t know how hard it was for me to keep this a secret. They called me about last month, telling me they were going with you, and the official ads would begin running next week. I guess—”

Mark was cut off abruptly by Donghyuck hugging him. He wrapped his arms so tightly around Mark, his circulation almost got cut off. Mark accepted the embrace, he didn’t mind it when Donghyuck buried his head in the crook of his neck.

“Do you like it?” Mark whispered, a serious edge to his voice.

Donghyuck nodded against his shoulders, shutting his eyes tightly so he didn’t cry from pure elation. “Thank you.” He took a deep breath and lifted his head from Mark, releasing his death grip on his torso and bringing his hands to cup Mark’s cheeks. “Thank you,” he repeated, planting a chaste kiss on his lips.

Donghyuck pulled away from him and studied the billboard for a few minutes. He turned back to Mark and smiled, before he started running.

“Where are you going?” Mark called out to him as he increased the distance between them.

“Beach!” he yelled.

Mark stilled and looked taken aback for a second, which caused Donghyuck to stop and laugh. He pointed towards the sandy stretch of land separating them from the ocean and clarified, “Beach, Mark. I’m not insulting you!”

He couldn’t see it, but he was certain Mark’s mouth formed an O before he burst into laughter. He began chasing after Donghyuck, and the latter continued advancing towards the beach.

He did not look back to see how far Mark had caught up with him when he got to the shore. He kicked off his shoes and sank his feet into the now cool sand and sighed.

Breeze in his hair, Donghyuck freed his hands from his sides and hung them in the air. The wind crept underneath his shirt and slapped his skin, causing him to wince at the cold, but he didn’t mind it so much. His hair wavered uncontrollably, flapping against his face. It was so long now, longer than he had ever imagined, and he loved it.

He loved everything he was turning into, he admitted happily to himself. Anytime he looked at the mirror, he smiled at himself rather than look away like he previously used to do. He loved his long black locks, he loved the way his aura darkened with black eyeliner. He loved the way his lips shone with pretty masks, the way his skin glistened with expensive oils.

Yes, he was a bit hungrier nowadays, but it didn’t matter. He was pretty enough, and got told it almost everyday. He closed his eyes as a pair of hands wrapped around him from the back, settling on his waist, the familiar cedar warming his nostrils.

“You’re happy,” Mark said to his ear. “I’ve never seen you this happy.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy,” Donghyuck confirmed. He rested his hands on Mark’s. “It’s not just from the ad campaign, it’s from within. My happiness. I’m smiling so much because I’d still be happy if I didn’t get it. I thought about it and realized it.”

He pried one of Mark’s hand’s looser so he could turn to face him in his hold. Bringing his hands up once again, Donghyuck rested his palms on Mark’s shoulders.

“I need to tell you something,” he said more solemnly.

Mark stared at him. He drew him closer by the waist, till their noses were almost touching. “I think I know what you want to say.”

“You do?” Donghyuck asked, his eyes flitting between Mark’s.

Mark smiled as he nodded. “You’ve fallen in love with me.”

Donghyuck’s little smile faltered. He exhaled, relieved that the confession was off his chest, but he couldn’t relax. He really couldn’t tell what Mark’s response would be. He waited, a little tense, and well within his right.

“Do you think it’s weird?” he asked nervously, breathlessly.

Mark puffed as he chuckled. “No, Hyuck, I felt that way the first time I laid my eyes on you.”

-