Chapter Text
He’d specifically picked this apartment complex because it’s supposed to be in a good neighborhood close to campus, so Zoro’s more than a little perplexed when his Wednesday night binge watch of Forged in Fire is interrupted by what sounds like a medieval battering ram hitting his neighbor’s door.
He hits pause on Netflix and sets his beer down next to the cup of microwave toppoki he was eating for dinner and listens.
“Man, what the fuck?” He hears Shura, one of the assholes who lives down the hallway, shout out way too loudly into the hall.
“Pizza delivery, fuckers.”
The responding voice is new. Zoro creeps over to the door to hear whatever’s going on more clearly.
“’Send your cutest delivery girl –‘ You think that shit’s funny?”
“Who the fuck are you?”
“Doesn’t fucking matter. I heard about the shit you tried to pull with Conis – you fuckers thought it’d be funny to try again? I’ll beat your asses for you.”
“Fuck you, man. Ohm, let’s kick this twink’s ass.”
He can’t hear what happens next through the door, though he does hear loud fumbling and shuffling. He’s throwing his door open before he can think better of it. He doesn’t make a habit of interfering in shit like this, but he knows what he looks like and knows he’s built like a brick house, and maybe just seeing him will be enough to stop his asshole neighbors from ganging up on the pizza guy. He steps into the hallway, and –
Well, shit.
He worried about the wrong guys.
Ohm and Shura lie crumpled on the ground, dazed. A tall, leggy blonde who looks like he should be modeling Armani or something stands over them, tapping his shoe on the ground and holding two pizza boxes daintily in his hand, like he’s making a normal delivery and not like he’s just laid out two musclehead gym bros with apparently little effort.
“Enjoy your pizza – you’re never eating it again. You’re 86’d, fuckers. Come by the shop again and I’ll knock you out.”
He stoops, sets the boxes down with surprising care, and pivots to start heading back in Zoro’s direction. He twitches when he notices Zoro looking, and –
Okay, fuck, the pizza guy’s hot.
Objectively, he looks kind of like shit. The dorky little ballcap he’s wearing covers up most of his pretty blond hair, and there’s a red mark on his chin where it looks like one of Zoro’s neighbors got a lucky hit in. The polo with the “Sky-Pizza” logo on it is baggy on him. Still, he’s got a handsome face, barring the swirl to his visible eyebrow, and bright blue eyes, and he just kicked two guys’ asses right outside Zoro’s door.
“Hey,” Zoro finds himself saying.
Pizza Guy winces. “Look, are you gonna call the cops?”
Zoro shakes his head. “Nah. Just wanted to know if there was a survey I could do or something.”
The guy makes a face. “To get me fired? Because I might’ve just done that myself.”
“No, to give you a good review. Shura and Ohm are dickheads.”
The pizza man snorts, and his sudden grin lights up his entire face, elevating it from tired, but handsome, to objectively gorgeous. “Thanks, man, but Sky-Pizza’s a little mom and pop place. Don’t have algorithms and surveys and shit. You wanna do me a favor? Buy a pizza or two. They’ve been having trouble ever since that fucking Dominos opened up across the street. Gan Fall’s got sourdough crust made from 90-year-old starter, but what do college age shitheads buy? Fucking Dominos.”
“Noted.”
The pizza guy tips his dorky ballcap at him and strides off. It’s only after he’s climbed into a battered Toyota Corolla and driven off that Zoro realizes he never got his name.
Fanart by @_karakoon on Twitter/X!