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Merlin's not an asshole.
He knew how to break up with someone—not just knew, but had in fact done so face to face like a non-asshole. But see, the thing was, his boyfriend Todd was an asshole. Todd cheated on Merlin.
Todd had to go.
And in the most humiliating way possible.
The plan took a week to come to Merlin, but it did like a dream, well no not like a dream, more like a smack to the head as he watched his asshole boyfriend snoop around Arthur's room. Why was he doing that? Well, Merlin asked and Todd said "no reason". First, Merlin thought Todd wanted to fuck Arthur, which would make sense considering he's fucked about every other blond twink in a twenty mile radius, but then Merlin cottoned on. Todd was intimidated by Arthur. Wanted to be Arthur in that creepy Single White Female way.
Arthur was hot. He worked for some tech company, or maybe his dad owned it. The details were fuzzy, but he was the one who answered Merlin's CL ad for a roommate, and he had a full time job. He was athletic and witty, and to Todd, he must have been competition in some macho way that Merlin would never understand.
Crushing knowledge in hand, Merlin quickly put the plan into motion. All it took really was a half-used bottle of KY and a condom he got for free on campus. The condom went on Todd's dick, the lube went everywhere, and Merlin was all-fours when he screamed, as throatily as possible, "YES. ARTHUR. YES" when he came.
There was a stillness to the air. More like Todd had frozen, his gross cheating cock still stuck in Merlin's ass. And then he pulled out rather quickly (asshole) and stumbled right of the bed. If Merlin had known what a dramatic ninny he was, their relationship probably wouldn't have progressed this far.
He sat up, and looked down at his loser now-ex. Todd was gaping at him like a fish. "Wha—did—you—him?"
"Ah," Merlin crossed his legs and slumped. "Yeah, sorry."
"Sorry?" Todd got up, he was shaking. The condom was sliding off his shriveled dick.
Merlin shrugged. "He's just… more. You know?"
"You two have fucked?" Well, that got shrill by the end of it.
Merlin didn't say anything, but he didn't do anything to negate Todd's question.
"Wow." Todd started to put his clothes on, condom still just hanging there. "You fucking slut. Just… I can't believe it."
"Mhm." Merlin leaned over to the bed stand and grabbed his phone. He knew Todd couldn't believe it—because Merlin was a fucking faithful guy, if both parties had committed to the relationship. But he had learned about Todd's ongoing fling with some tart he worked with weeks ago, and the sting had faded. Now all he wanted was peace and quiet. He glanced up at Todd with raised eyebrows.
"Well?" Todd said, resting his fists on his hips. "I think I deserve an explanation."
"You don't, actually." Merlin nodded towards the door. "Get out."
Thankfully Todd didn't press, and just stormed out of the room like he was the one who had something to be angry about. Merlin laughed.
And then he sighed. That was the end of it, his two year relationship.
He got out of bed and went to the kitchen, staring at the contents of the fridge for a couple of seconds before deciding on a beer. When he closed the door, he saw Arthur standing frozen in the living room.
Arthur was wearing some jeans and a shirt… the usual.
Merlin was naked.
"Ah… hello," Merlin said. He was glad the counter was blocking his sloppy bottom half from view. "Didn't realize. You were here."
Arthur seemed to wake up. "Yeah," he said. His voice was rough. His eyes were dark. Oh, and he was holding a book in front of his crotch, which meant he was hard.
Staring, Merlin set the bottle of beer down on the counter. "Did you perhaps… uh, hear?"
A second passed, and then Arthur drew in a long breath and tossed the book on the couch. "Yeah. The whole fucking thing."
Merlin would have launched into the full story, would have explained everything, only Arthur was then striding around the counter, into the kitchen—and then Merlin found himself shoved up against the refrigerator, wrists held hard above his head. As Arthur traced a thumb over Merlin's left nipple, he said, "Crazy thing. Coulda sworn it wasn't me fucking you in there." He grinned. "And yet?"
"And yet," Merlin echoed breathlessly. "Well." His heart was thundering. Of course he had always wanted Arthur, but the guy seemed so… not gay. As in he only brought girls home, which Merlin took to be pretty concrete evidence.
"Hm." Arthur's blue-eyed gaze slowly and deliberately traveled down Merlin's naked body, and then he reached forward to slid his hand under Merlin's cock. "Dirty."
It was. After all, Merlin had been kinda coital not ten minutes beforehand.
Arthur gave him a squeeze that got Merlin on his toes with a high, "Shit!"
"I'm not fucking sloppy seconds."
"Oh—"
Nope. Didn't get the words out.
Merlin was grappled with, manhandled to the sink and pushed over it until his feet were off the ground, and then he heard a zip—the hose nozzle being pulled out, felt his ass cheeks being spread, and then a harsh stream of hot water hit his hole. "Fuck! Holy fuck—what."
"Keep your mouth shut," Arthur muttered, directing the spray down Merlin's taint. "Christ. Ten months of watching you parade this ass around the apartment. C'mon, Merlin, you thought you were goading the straight guy, didn't you? Moaning so loud when that dishrag of a boyfriend was fucking you."
Where. Did. This. Come. From.
Not that Merlin was complaining, no his mouth was shut as ordered. Arthur's rough hands were sloughing away the water, more water was pouring onto their kitchen floor and Merlin couldn't get a foothold.
He was so fucking hard. He was whimpering as the hot water gushed around his cock, as Arthur rubbed him down like a sweaty racehorse.
Hearing the nozzle zip back into place, feeling the water stop, Merlin shivered.
A blunt cockhead pushed against his hole and he cursed out loud. Immediately, his ass was slapped and he jolted forward.
"Take it," Arthur growled.
With a gulp, Merlin replied, "Okay." His voice was soft and docile. He spread his legs and arched his back for ease of access like a good bottom boy. Arthur gripped his hip with one hand, and pressed in again, this time successfully sinking past Merlin's entrance. Glancing over his shoulder, Merlin licked his lips. He wished he could see just how it looked to have Arthur's cock pierce him. He started rocking his hips back, rolling and squeezing.
Arthur murmured in approval, patting at the base of Merlin's spine. He slid his other hand up his chest, pushing his shirt up, and started palming his own nipple. Merlin groaned at the sight.
Then Arthur dropped the whole slow thing, and clasped Merlin's hips. Without warning, he started fucking Merlin harshly and Merlin dropped his head forward between his arms, crying out and gasping.
"If you say that dishrag's name when you come, you're getting throttled."
"Fu—" Merlin squeezed his eyes shut. Todd had been the last thing on his mind. He grabbed his cock and started jacking, his toes curling as he neared release. When he came, he tightened around Arthur who let out a strangled curse before coming too.
He slumped forward, pushing Merlin across the counter, and they stayed like that for a moment, panting and sweaty.
"That guy out for good?" Arthur asked.
Merlin swallowed. "Yeah," he said with a raspy voice.
He felt Arthur shift, and then a warm kiss press against the back of his neck. "Just so you know, I'm not gonna tolerate those weak-ass games you played on him."
At that… Merlin started giggling. He couldn't help it. "I'm not an asshole."
Arthur pushed forward a little, reminding Merlin that there was still a cock inside of him. "You sure about that?"
"Well."
Arthur laughed.
And that was how he and Merlin ended up fucking for six months, which is when Arthur presumably got fed up with the vague status of their relationship and declared that Merlin was his boyfriend--and therefore would be in deep shit if he ever called out another guy's name during sex again.