Chapter Text
The door chime twinkled above Regulus’s head as he walked through the doorway into the warm cafe. A soft yellow light cast over the small collection of wooden tables, bringing a soft sort of warmth to the room. It smelled like coffee and buttered pastries, like always. If Regulus had a happy place, this was it.
He shook out his black curls, dragging a hand through them to remove the snowflakes scattered throughout. The dampness of them sticking to his fingers as he pulled. Regulus shrugged his coat from his shoulders, draping it over an empty chair on his way to the register.
He all but collapsed into the small bistro-like chair when he returned, coffee in hand. Regulus was having the worst day of his life, or close to it anyway.
His job interview had left him exhausted. He should be ecstatic, being offered his dream job after the undeniable disaster his interview had been. Regulus brought his coffee to his lips, blinking away the panic that threatened to rise beyond his chest. He could blame his words on his nervousness, his exhaustion, anything. But Regulus knew it hadn’t been any of that.
He was a black-belt people pleaser, whether he wanted to be or not. It was the way he was raised, to just nod along and agree, re-shape himself into whatever it was that someone wanted him to be. That’s why he nodded along while his interviewer, no, his boss now, asked him about his family. It was rather bold of his boss, if Regulus was honest to assume that he had any family to begin with. It was downright presumptuous to assume he had a partner and child.
Regulus had found it somewhat difficult to listen to his boss’ ramblings after the formal part of the interview. He’d thought that there was no way the job would be offered to him. He was sick and tired, likely high on cough medicine as well, if he was honest. He just sat, nodding along while he designed a plan for moving forward, other jobs he’d apply to, freelance work to do in the meantime, among other things.
“Are you married?” Albus had asked him, dragging him back to the present. He was a wizened old man with piercing blue eyes that gave the illusion of kindness. Regulus knew though, that his stare was trying to get a read on him, tearing his mannerisms and words apart with a glance.
“No, sir. I’m not,” Regulus answered, a frown pulling the corners of his mouth downward.
“Hmm,” the old man hummed thoughtfully, closing his eyes for a moment. “Engaged, then,” he decided.
Regulus’s mind reeled. He wasn’t even dating now, much less in a committed relationship. Regulus fidgeted with the silver band on his ring finger. The wrong ring finger, though, for a wedding band. Had he given the wrong impression? What had the old man said to him earlier, while Regulus hadn’t been paying attention?
“Although aren’t you a tad young to have a child?” Albus asked, opening his eyes once again to look at him. Regulus got the impression this old man could see into his soul, bearing all his secrets open on that table between them. Panic rose in Regulus’s throat then, dragging his old habits to the surface.
“From a previous relationship,” he all but stammered, hoping that his tone came off as surprise instead of whatever jumble of feelings he was currently drowning in.
Albus nodded slowly, accepting Regulus’s response. “How old are you, Regulus?”
“Twenty,” he replied quickly, though a part of him thought that Albus wasn’t supposed to ask him that sort of question.
“Hmm,” he hummed again. His gaze softened on Regulus, smoothing out some of the sharp panic he was feeling. “I should look forward to meeting them, your partner and child.”
“Sir?”
“At our family potluck this weekend, you will bring them, won’t you? It’s a wonderful way to meet your new colleagues.”
Regulus could only repeat, “Sir?”
“I’m offering you the job, Regulus.”
Regulus had, of course, taken the job.
He replayed what he remembered from the interview in his head repeatedly, wondering what else he had unwittingly agreed to. Regulus placed his coffee cup on the table with a sigh, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose between his fingers. How would he explain to Albus that he did not in fact have a partner or a child?
Just nod and agree , his mother had always told him. It had gotten him into some uncomfortable situations before, but this was something else.
A soft twinkle from behind him signaled the door to the cafe opening once again. Frantic steps and breathing brought Regulus’s attention to the new patron. He was attractive, Regulus would give him that. He was a tall man with caramel-coloured skin. He pulled his round, gold glasses from his face, wiping the lenses with his knitted jumper before placing them back on his face. He glanced about the room quickly before his gaze landed on Regulus.
The man took a step forward, blinking twice. Suddenly, he rushed towards Regulus, making up the short distance between them in two steps, swinging himself into the chair next to him and gripping Regulus’s shoulders in his hands.
“I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend,” The man stammered quickly, gaze intense on Regulus’s eyes.
“I’m sorry?”
“I-I don’t have time to explain, I just really need-” the man was cut off by the sound of the door chiming once again. Regulus saw a wave of panic and recognition flash in the man’s eyes when he glanced over at the doorway quickly. Something like an apologetic look appeared then, before the man leaned forwards, gripping Regulus’s cheeks with his hands and pulling him into a kiss.
Regulus’s eyes widened, caught off guard. The kiss was warm, chaste, but more than a peck. This close, he could smell the other man’s cologne. He smelled sweet, something like cinnamon, and something warm, like smoke. Regulus’s eyes fluttered closed, feeling a warm sensation plant itself in his chest. To his surprise, he melted into the other man’s lips, kissing him back.
It couldn’t have lasted more than a second, but Regulus noticed that he was suddenly cold when the other pulled away, smiling warmly at him.
“James?” asked a voice from behind Regulus. He turned around and saw a man wearing a vintage-looking sweater. His hair was curled into a fluffy brown mop on top of his head. He also, notably, had an old scar running across his face from his right eyebrow to sweep across his opposite cheek.
“Oh, hey Remus,” the man beside him said casually. James , Regulus thought. That’s what Remus had called him. James leaned back, distancing himself slightly from Regulus. He couldn’t help but notice that James’s knees were still pressing against his own and that he had left a hand on Regulus’s knee.
Regulus stared down at James’s hand; at the simple gold band he wore on his ring finger. His too, was on the wrong hand to mean anything significant Regulus noticed. His brain refreshed then, remembering what James had said to him when he came in. I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend. He had been panicked. Regulus wondered why.
It didn’t really matter why, he supposed. James had been very clear about what he needed and Regulus, unfortunately, was great at moulding himself into what others needed. Normally, Regulus liked to think, he wouldn’t have entertained this, but he had ulterior motives. James would owe him, and Regulus planned on taking advantage of the situation very soon.
He also knew though, that he would have to sell this whole boyfriend thing. He only hoped that his lack of experience wouldn't be so obvious. That his years of witnessing his older brother throw himself at girls would make up for it.
He put his hand on top of James’s, who caught on and intertwined their fingers. Regulus tried to ignore how foreign it felt, a warm palm pressed against his own, soft fingers tangled with his. He hadn’t ever realized from looking just how possessive this gesture could feel. Especially since James’s hands were much larger than his own.
Regulus glanced up at Remus, who had cocked an eyebrow and threw a questioning look in his direction. He needed to say something, he realized. What would his brother do if James was one of his girlfriends? Regulus cocked his own eyebrow, returning the look Remus was giving him with an attitude that was very unlike his own. He turned to look at James, raising his eyebrows in a way he hoped transmitted some sort of unspoken message, or at least looked like it to onlookers.
“Jamie, who’s this?” Regulus asked, forcing his voice to sound almost bored, inconvenienced, even. James blushed at the sudden nickname, biting his bottom lip between his teeth. Regulus smirked. He wondered if his brother would be proud.
James grabbed the back of his neck with his free hand, never letting go of Regulus’s. For good measure, Regulus began tracing circles on the back of James’s hand with his thumb. He pretended not to notice how James was staring at the pair of hands in Regulus’s lap. “This is my friend, Remus. I told you about him?”
“Remus?” Regulus furrowed his brow for a moment, pretending to remember something.
“Moony,” James replied, as if he were clarifying.
“Oh, Moony,” Regulus replied. What a stupid nickname , he thought. “Of course.” Regulus turned to face Remus, meeting his gaze head-on. “I’m Reg, James’s-”
“I know who you are,” Remus snapped. The man sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose with two fingers. “Sorry, just.” Remus took a deep breath, letting his hands fall to his sides. He forced his gaze to meet Regulus’s and put out his hand. “Nice to finally met you, James talks about you all. The. Time. Was starting to wonder if you were real, to be honest.”
Wordlessly, Regulus took Remus’s hand with a nod. Remus had a firm grip, but Regulus made sure his was just as firm. Their handshake lasted only a few seconds before the two pulled away. Regulus shot a glance in James’s direction. What sort of hole have you dug yourself into? Not that he could judge, really.
“Just popped in to let you know that I got called into work and can’t drop Harry off today. Pads said he’s on it, but I wouldn’t trust him on the back of his motorbike, so don’t let him talk you into it,” Remus said, crossing his arms again. “Maybe your boyfriend can pick him up for you. He’s met Harry, right? That’s what you said.” Regulus had an inkling that Remus was inherently a suspicious person, and that he wouldn’t fall for their act as easily as he’d hoped.
What would Sirius do? Channeling his brother, Regulus turned his attention back to James. To his credit, it seemed like he was trying to keep his panic out of his expression. He reached out, brushing a piece of James’s hair behind his ear. Casual touches, Regulus thought. This might convince Remus. Hopefully.
“It’s okay, Jamie. It’s no trouble at all, really. We’ll pick him up together.” Now, Regulus really wasn’t sure who or what Harry was, but he hoped his sentiment would be appropriate for whatever it was. Though, if Harry was a stuffed animal, Regulus was maybe overdoing it a tad.
James swallowed and nodded his head vigorously. “We’ll go after work. Thank you.” James turned to look at his friend again, so Regulus did as well.
Remus looked as though he wanted to say something, but before he got the chance, his phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out, staring at the screen for a moment, eyes running over whatever notification had just popped up. He grimaced, shoving the device back into the pocket of his jeans.
“I've gotta go. See you later?” Remus asked. Though, he seemed to be asking both he and James.
“Yeah, of course. No problem. My shift is just about to start anyway,” James said, glancing down at his watch. The two waved a goodbye before Remus left, the door chime twinkling once more at his departure.
There was a beat of silence between the pair before Regulus shifted in his seat and James pulled his hand away, folding his fingers together on the wooden table. He breathed out quickly before adjusting his glasses on his nose and forcing his gaze to meet Regulus’s.
“Thank you,” he said it with such sincerity in his voice that Regulus couldn’t help but furrow his brow and twitch his lips into a slight frown. He straightened his posture, no longer channeling his older brother’s laid-back, casual attitude.
“Explain,” Regulus stated, his usual cool tone seeping back into his voice.
James looked startled. His eyes went wide, and he ran his fingers through his hair. He let the strands Regulus had pushed behind his ear fall back into his face. He pushed himself up from the table, fidgeting with his gold ring. “Ah, well. Thank you,” he repeated. “I really should be going now-”
Regulus pulled James back into his seat by his wrist.
“You don’t get to kiss me and then drag me into your charade without an explanation.”
“Right, sorry.” James’s eyes flickered around the room. He looked at the door, the floor, the register, Regulus’s coffee. He refused to look at Regulus. James took a deep breath, settling his eyes on his lap.
“My friends have been on me lately about dating. They’re worried, but I haven’t been able to, not since my fiancée...” James paused, letting out a shaky breath. “Ex-fiancée,” he corrected. “Not since she left me and Harry.”
Okay, Regulus thought. Harry probably wasn’t a stuffed animal. “So, you lied to them to get them to leave you alone?”
James nodded.
“And they didn’t believe you, I imagine.”
James shook his head.
“Figures,” Regulus huffed. “That Remus chap seems too smart for his own good.”
James laughed at that, the sound brightening the atmosphere around them. His amber eyes glimmered with amusement, maybe even a little mischief.
“Do you have a plan moving forwards?” Regulus asked. James only quirked his head to the side in question. “You don’t think they’re going to leave you alone just because Remus met your boyfriend once, did you?”
Regulus watched as that dawned on James, wiping the smile from his face. “Shit,” he cursed. James lunged forwards, grasping both of Regulus’s hands in his own. He was very close now, staring desperately into Regulus’s eyes. “You have to keep pretending to be my boyfriend. Just until they back off,” he pleaded.
Regulus’s brain short-circuited for a second, taking its time to come back online as it adjusted to James being in such close proximity. Again.
“Let’s get one thing clear,” Regulus said, his voice unintentionally coming out as a whisper. “I don’t have to help you.” James deflated at his words, the corners of his mouth turning downward, his bottom lip sticking out slightly into a pout. “I will though, if you do something in return for me.”
James nodded quickly. “Anything.” Regulus twitched. James was far too trusting.
“I need you to pretend to be my fiancé at a work event this Saturday.” James’s eyebrow shot up, a question.
“I may have accidentally let my boss believe I have a fiancé and a child after I was convinced my interview went so poorly, I’d never be offered the job.”
James cracked a smile, looking as though he was trying desperately not to laugh. He leaned away from Regulus, letting go of his hands as he did.
“You have yourself a deal, Reg,” he stated, holding out his right hand.
“Regulus,” he corrected, shaking James’s hand. He sighed. “Now I just have to find someone willing to lend us their child for a few hours.
“Don’t worry,” James winked. “I’ve got that covered.”