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Choi Yeonjun doesn’t like to consider himself a popular boy, really.
It’s still very easy for him to bring attention to what he’s doing even when he isn’t trying to, so maybe he should start accepting the fact that he is a bit notorious after all. He’s not known as a social butterfly for nothing…
Either way, this year is his last in school, and between studying for college entrance exams and hanging out with his friends, it all doesn’t matter that much to him. Basically, school popularity won’t really make a difference in his life once it all ends.
Just because other people he doesn’t know know about him, it doesn’t mean that it has much to do with him, right?
However, Yeonjun shouldn’t have forgotten that just because he’s had peace at school until now, things wouldn’t change in the last semester of classes…
It all starts in a meeting of their group of friends – as it always does – outside school, a weekend before they have to return from summer vacation
Yeonjun is playing a game with Soobin, and he doesn’t really know when it happens but someone (probably Wooyoung) knocks some books down and the thump makes him pause the game.
“Sorry, sorry!” Wooyoung apologizes hurriedly, already getting the books from the floor.
“It’s alright,” Yeonjun shrugs. He stands up from where he is, approaching his friend, “are you okay?”
“Yeah, don’t worry!”
Before Yeonjun can do anything else, Kai reaches for a folded piece of paper and unintentionally reads what’s written on it.
“Gyu?” He reads it out loud, one of his eyebrows raises up as he stares at Yeonjun, “and a heart?”
“Ohh, what’s this?” Wooyoung asks excitedly and looks at the piece of paper. He whistles, “woah, I didn’t know you were the type to do these things, Yeonjunie!”
Yeonjun makes a confused face before taking the thing from Kai’s hands and checking it out. It really has “Gyu (heart)” written on it, and it doesn’t take too long for him to notice that the writing on it isn’t his. It’s from his sister, Yeonhee.
Oh, damn. Is Yeonhee at the age where she’s writing love letters already? And why did she hide it between his books?
“I’m not—” Yeonjun tries to defend himself, but then he remembers that Yeonhee probably didn’t mean for others to know about it and stops. Well. What’s so bad about them thinking he’s the one who wrote a love letter to someone? At least his sister’s puppy crush will be a secret for a while more. “I wrote it some time ago and didn’t remember that it was there…”
Yeonjun hides the piece of paper in his pocket, thinking about bringing it back to his sister later.
“I didn’t know our Yeonjun-hyung was such a romantic…” Soobin smirks, putting his hand over Yeonjun’s shoulder.
Yeonjun rolls his eyes at him.
“Who’s Gyu, though? Are they from another class? I don’t remember anyone called Gyu in ours,” Wooyoung questions him.
Who’s Gyu? Well. Yeonjun would also like to know!
He thinks of making someone up for them to forget about it soon.
It must take him a really long time to answer since Kai interrupts his train of thought to ask “Is it Beomgyu-hyung?” and everyone turns to look at Yeonjun after that.
Uh, oh. Beomgyu? Choi Beomgyu? Well, yeah, Yeonjun doesn’t know much about him other than the times he’s with them in their group outings. And the times he tutors his sister. But he’s cute though, Yeonjun can admit. Not a really bad choice for someone to have a crush on… His sister has good taste, huh.
“The second year hoobae?” Wooyoung wonders, glancing at Kai. “I see…” He then looks at Yeonjun again. “Is it him?”
With all three of his friends staring at him so seriously, Yeonjun can only nod in agreement, before voicing a small “yeah, it is.”
It’s not like anything will happen out of it, right? His friends won’t tell anyone about this, he’s sure.
“You should ask him out, hyung!” Kai says with a grin, “I’m sure he’d say yes!”
“Uh…” Yeonjun glances at Kai. “I’m okay with things as they are right now, though,” he justifies.
“Nonsense, hyung!” Soobin is the one to protest now. “He already knows who you are so I’m sure he wouldn’t mind it if you were to date.”
Yeonjun looks desperately at Wooyoung, hoping that he’ll be the one who agrees with Yeonjun to keep things the same.
“Go for it, Yeonjunie!” Wooyoung gives him a thumbs up.
Yeonjun sighs in despair. He has the best friends, he knows, but sometimes having the best friends means that they’ll be supportive even when they shouldn’t be (when he’s lying, for example).
“I’ll think about it,” he concedes, and that earns him a cheer from the three other boys.
“Hyung will date his crush!”
Ugh. Yeonjun has a bad feeling about this.
///
Choi Beomgyu thought that this Sunday spent with friends would go the same as the other ones – wherein he talks with his friends and stares at Yeonjun-hyung until he can somehow telepathize his feelings to him. He was shocked to learn that nothing would go as usual, in the end.
First of all, the group outing consisted of only the five of them – Beomgyu, Taehyun, Kai, Soobin and Yeonjun – and that was already unusual since other people went out with them too. Second, Kai kept staring at him since he arrived, and he giggled sometimes while looking at him, which made him furrow his eyebrows at his friend in confusion and annoyance. Finally, Soobin-hyung smiled at him more than usual, asking him questions about his life and even about his dating history.
Everything was so weird!
Now, Beomgyu is on the way to meet his friends in the movie theater hall, since he decided to go to the toilet while they bought the tickets, and he stops in his tracks when he hears his name in the conversation without him.
Hiding behind a pillar, he sees the exact moment that Yeonjun-hyung pulls a palm up to Taehyun and Taehyun opens his eyes very wide.
“Yeonjun-hyung’s got a crush on Beomgyu-hyung?” He asks in an almost shout, and Kai puts his hand over his mouth quickly.
“Shhh! Beomgyu-hyung is coming back soon!”
Beomgyu-hyung is, in fact, hearing everything at that moment and is not sure if he can come back alive after that.
Yeonjun-hyung? A crush? On him?
It’s probably a joke, right? Right?
Beomgyu giggles to himself before sliding down on the floor. He leans his arms on his knees and then covers his face.
No. This is not possible… Really?
Beomgyu listens to their conversation a bit more, but he can’t hear much else since they’ve lowered their voices now. He can only stand up again and try to take a peek at his friends to see the expressions they are making. If it’s a joke, he’ll probably see it in their faces.
What happens is him seeing Yeonjun-hyung covering his own face with a hand, while Soobin and Kai talk excitedly with Taehyun at the side.
Beomgyu feels his face burn.
He runs to the bathroom again to wash his face and compose himself before he can go back. He has a stupid smile on his face and he can’t stop the way his heart is badump-ing really hard right now.
Ah!!!
Does it mean that he has a chance with Yeonjun-hyung now?
His heart will jump out of his chest!
It takes him some minutes to calm down, and he even receives a message from Taehyun asking him if he was okay. He replies with an ‘yeah. coming’, before taking one last look at the mirror and going back to the hall.
Oh, man. How will he be okay in front of Yeonjun-hyung now?
///
Yeonjun gets fidgety as their group waits for Beomgyu to arrive.
He has been on edge since he knew that the other boy would be a part of their outing – it was Soobin’s idea to hang out, after all – and he can’t stop noticing him ever since they greeted each other.
He really is cute. And there’s something really nice about the way he laughs that makes Yeonjun’s chest feel a bit tight when he hears it. He also teases Kai and Taehyun a lot which seems a bit endearing since Yeonjun is not the one he’s teasing.
(Maybe Yeonjun’d like to be a part of it too. As a friend. Okay? Maybe.)
While Beomgyu is away, Soobin and Kai end up telling Taehyun that Yeonjun is interested in Beomgyu and now the lie attacks one more victim. This means that this thing really is blowing out of proportions, but then Yeonjun was the one who decided to start it so he shall deal with it now.
Yeonjun tries to change the subject after a while and is successful. By the time Beomgyu is back they are already talking about the movie that they’ll watch and everything about crushes is forgotten.
(Everything but the way Yeonjun can’t for the life of himself focus on the movie on the big screen and is thinking all about the way Beomgyu seems to be blushing more than he was before.)
Since his friends are supportive, Yeonjun shouldn’t be surprised by the fact that at the time they say their goodbyes, it’s decided that Yeonjun should take Beomgyu home since they live close to each other.
Of course they do.
“It’s not necessary!” Beomgyu moves his hand in front of himself, refusing. “I don’t want to bother Yeonjun-hyung with that!”
“It wouldn’t bother me,” Yeonjun says, because yeah, he’s being matchmaked but Beomgyu is not the one at fault for that.
He swears he hears one of his friends whispering “of course it wouldn’t bother him” but he pretends he’s not hearing anything.
“I can walk with you, if you’re fine with that,” Yeonjun suggests.
“Alright…” Beomgyu smiles at Yeonjun. “I’ll be in your care then, hyung.”
Yeonjun nods at Beomgyu, while some of their friends coo at them.
Beomgyu flips Taehyun (or was it Kai?) off before telling goodbye to his friends.
Yeonjun tells them bye as well, before walking beside Beomgyu as they make their way home.
The silence is not uncomfortable at all, but Yeonjun can’t say he’s feeling a hundred percent peachy either. He’s got too many memories of his friends’ teasing on his head to be ‘calm’ around Beomgyu now.
“What did you think of the movie, hyung?” Beomgyu asks after some time, staring ahead of him and not looking at Yeonjun at all.
Yeonjun doesn’t remember anything about the movie.
“It was cool,” he says, hoping that Beomgyu won’t ask him about his favorite part or something. “I still prefer the manhwa, though,” he adds, which isn’t a lie since he read the manhwa that inspired the movie. “What about you?”
“I like the manhwa too!” Beomgyu answers happily, staring at Yeonjun now. “I think the movie was nice but maybe if it was animated it would’ve been even better… I’m not really a fan of live actions when it comes to this genre of comics…”
“Same,” Yeonjun agrees with a grin. “I think the battle scenes look so much cooler when they are animated instead of recorded with a lot of green screens…”
“Right?!”
Yeonjun gladly discovers that Yeonjun is a comic book enthusiast like him, and that they share a few of the same favorite series. The two talk about what they are reading right now – when they’re not having tests or exams – and they promise to swap manhwas and mangas the next time they meet each other at school.
Time passes by really fast as they start talking about their mutual interest, and Yeonjun can already see the park near his house that signs that they’ll have to separate soon..
Suddenly, Beomgyu stops in his tracks and stops talking too. Yeonjun looks at him bemusedly, stopping in front of him as well.
“Did something happen?” Yeonjun asks worriedly, as he hears Beomgyu let out a sigh.
Beomgyu shakes his head.
“Yeonjun-hyung, I have to tell you something,” Beomgyu starts, “When I was coming back from the bathroom I heard you guys talking about me…”
Yeonjun pauses for a moment until he thinks about what Beomgyu must be talking about. Could it be…?
“I–I heard about you having a crush on me and stuff and I’m not sure if it’s true but hyung I had so much fun with you today and we have similar interests! So if it is true and you’re not opposed to the idea, would you go out with me?” Beomgyu says almost in one breath, staring at Yeonjun with wide (puppy) eyes.
Yeonjun is speechless, and he stares at Beomgyu with the same wide-eyed stare he’s receiving.
Oh, damn. Beomgyu is asking him out, isn’t he? Because he thinks Yeonjun likes him?
Shit.
“Beomgyu…”
“It’s fine if you don’t want to!” Beomgyu says rushedly, seeing Yeonjun’s hesitation. “Maybe it’s not that at all and I’m being impulsive so I understand if you’d rather stay as friends too,” he adds.
His words make it seem like he’s okay with the situation as it is, but Yeonjun swears he can see a small frown in Beomgyu’s face as he talks about staying as they are. It’s cute, but it also makes Yeonjun think that he doesn’t like seeing that melancholic expression on the other boy’s face.
“I can—” Yeonjun protests hurriedly, not really understanding why it seems so urgent for him to say that now, “I mean, we can go out. I’d like that…”
It’s not really a lie, though. Yeonjun is interested in Beomgyu after this last conversation they had together, and it wouldn’t be bad if they could have a date and see where it goes…
(However, it’s not true that Yeonjun has a crush on him now, but he can cross that bridge later, when he tells Beomgyu everything…)
“Sweet!” Beomgyu replies to that, which makes Yeonjun laugh at him. Beomgyu blushes, and Yeonjun feels like he can totally see himself having a crush on Beomgyu in the future. Probably. If not, they at least could still be friends.
The two end up exchanging numbers and promising each other to send a message later when discussing where they should meet up.
“Goodbye then,” Beomgyu waves at Yeonjun as he walks in the direction of his street. “See you, hyung!”
“Bye…” Yeonjun answers, watching Beomgyu walking away for a while before going to his own house.
Yeonjun is probably going on a date with the boy everyone mistakenly thought he liked but that is liked by Yeonjun’s sister instead.
Oh, man, Yeonhee is gonna kill him.
///
Today, Beomgyu and Yeonjun will be hanging out at Beomgyu’s house alone for the first time since they started ‘going out’.
Beomgyu still can’t believe that this is his life now and that he’s sort of going out with the person he’s liked since he started high school.
(Okay, they are still getting to know each other and are going slow but ah! Beomgyu thinks he’ll surely die of happiness very soon. He can wait until Yeonjun-hyung is ready to date him for real!)
Beomgyu paces around his room anxiously, checking every corner to see if everything is in order once more, before he goes to wait for Yeonjun at the living room.
It doesn’t take long for the other to arrive, and Beomgyu greets him happily at the door as soon as he opens it.
“Hyung, hi!” Beomgyu waves with a grin on his face, “please come in.”
“Hello, Gyu-ah,” Yeonjun brushes Beomgyu’s hair softly, before letting go and entering his house. “Excuse me, then… Is Auntie home?”
Beomgyu shakes his head.
“She left to buy something for dinner but she’ll come back soon,” he explains. “Come on, let’s go to my room. I’ve got some new manhwas to show you.”
“Alright! I also created a list with some of the songs you asked me to recommend to you. I can play them while we read…”
Beomgyu and Yeonjun sit down on the floor in Beomgyu’s room. Yeonjun takes a look around Beomgyu’s room while Beomgyu tries to distract himself by tidying stuff up on his coffee table.
“You have a nice room,” Yeonjun smiles at Beomgyu, and then points at the guitar case in the corner. “Do you play guitar too?”
“Yeah, I do,” Beomgyu grins. “I also have a piano but it’s in the living room right now so I will show you that later… Wait! I know how to play the opening for ORV on the guitar. Do you want to hear?”
“I’d love to…”
Beomgyu gets up quickly to grab his guitar and prepares himself to play. He obviously gets nervous around Yeonjun-hyung, but music is the one thing that can always calm him down, so maybe he can become a little more comfortable if he plays for a bit.
The notes from the song come to him very easily, as he has played that song a lot of times already, so Beomgyu closes his eyes as his fingers fall on the cords. He gets immersed in the song, not noticing much else other than the sound waves around him.
When Beomgyu is almost at the end of his playing, he opens his eyes and sees Yeonjun staring at him very attentively, and that is enough to make Beomgyu unconsciously miss a note in the song.
Yeonjun looks at him surprised, and Beomgyu lowers his head down in embarrassment, before he finally finishes the song.
“That was beautiful, Gyu-ah,” Yeonjun praises him, “you play so well.” He’s smiling at Beomgyu.
Beomgyu nods at that, trying to pull himself together before looking up at Yeonjun. He’s pretty sure he’s blushing, but he’s also trying to not be that lame in front of hyung.
“Thank you, hyung,” he replies, “I’ve practiced this a lot of times since I really love this soundtrack,” he laughs.
“It’s really good! I wish I could play something but I’ve only dedicated myself to dancing sometimes, not so much to playing instruments…” He pouts.
“Ah, but you can still learn if you want!” Beomgyu suggests, “it’s never too late to learn a new hobby!”
“Oh, would you teach me then if I wanted to learn?” Yeonjun asks in a teasing tone. “Would you be my teacher?”
“Of course!” Beomgyu smiles, “I can teach you how to play the guitar, Yeonjun-ah!”
Yeonjun’s eyes widen at that and Beomgyu cackles.
“Oh so it’s not hyung anymore, then?” Yeonjun sighs, “no respect for someone who doesn’t even know the musical notes, I see…” he gives a fake sigh.
Beomgyu keeps laughing, less nervous now that he feels that he can joke about with Yeonjun like this.
“I’m sorry, hyung,” Beomgyu apologizes, “I won’t do that anymore,” he says. “Today,” he adds.
Yeonjun shakes his head (fondly?) at Beomgyu, before mumbling something like “you’re lucky you’re cute.”
Beomgyu pretends not to hear it and offers to play another song. He’s so not going to lose to Yeonjun-hyung in the teasing today!
While playing songs, Beomgyu still talks a bit with Yeonjun, so sometimes the songs stop in the middle when he gets too excited about talking to keep playing. Once in a while, Yeonjun will try to sing to the song Beomgyu is playing and Beomgyu will die a bit listening to how good his singing voice is.
When they get tired of it – Beomgyu misses notes from laughing hard at Yeonjun’s mispronounced lyrics – they decide to take a break for some snacks. They bring the drinks and appetizers to the coffee table and start eating and drinking leisurely.
“It’s fun hanging out with you, Gyu-ah,” Yeonjun says between cookie bites. “We’ve known each other for a while because of the guys but we never had the chance to hang out like this before…”
Beomgyu nods in agreement.
“Yeah…” He says. Before he loses courage, he decides to confess everything he’s been feeling even before he asked Yeonjun-hyung to go out with him. “But, although we weren’t really friends I already had my eye on you, hyung,” he declares.
Yeonjun chokes on his drink. Beomgyu gets surprised and stands up to smack his back.
“Are you okay, hyung?” He asks worriedly.
Yeonjun nods.
“Yeah, ‘m fine,” he coughs a bit. “You were saying…?”
“Ah,” Beomgyu sits beside Yeonjun on the floor. He’s sure his face is warm, but there’s nothing he can do about it. Yeonjun-hyung is already going out with him, so there’s no harm in knowing the totality of Beomgyu’s feelings. “I mean… I had a crush on you before we started going out. I–I just kept noticing hyung whenever we all went out and you were so kind and handsome that it just happened,” he justifies.
Yeonjun takes another sip of his drink, seemingly a bit nervous. Beomgyu thinks it’s very cute of him.
“I didn’t intend to confess anything for now – maybe not before you graduated – but then I heard you and the boys talking about you maybe ‘liking’ me too so I decided to take my chance,” Beomgyu confesses. “It made me so happy to know that hyung also liked me!”
Yeonjun gave a small smile, putting his glass on the coffee table.
“I’m glad,” he said softly.
Perhaps Yeonjun-hyung is shyer than Beomgyu thought, because he’s quieter now when he’s listening to Beomgyu talking. But that’s okay too, since Beomgyu knows that they’ll have time to get to know each other even more and become less shy with each other.
Beomgyu approaches Yeonjun, offering his hand towards him.
“Hyung, we’re going out, right? So can we hold hands?” He asks, pretending that the blush on his face isn’t burning his cheeks.
Yeonjun gives a small laugh at that, the frown on his face dissipating at that.
“Of course,” Yeonjun reaches for Beomgyu’s hand, holding it in his and intertwining their fingers. “Like this?” He asks, but the way he smirks at Beomgyu shows that he’s just being a little shit about it now.
Beomgyu rolls his eyes and mumbles a “yeah”, before finally letting it sink in that he’s holding hands with the hyung he likes for the first time. He feels warm all over and his hands tremble a bit holding Yeonjun’s.
Oh, man. This is probably the first time Beomgyu is doing something romantic with someone other than holding the hands of his crushes in middle school. This is the first time that matters, after all. Beomgyu’s going to go into cardiac arrest.
Beomgyu is distracted staring at their locked hands and he doesn’t notice Yeonjun’s movements until he feels the other boy’s hand touching the hair at his nape. He shivers and gives a surprised glance at Yeonjun.
“Hyung?”
“Gyu-ah,” Yeonjun’s hand moves to Beomgyu’s face, “can we kiss?” He asks with a contemplative look.
Beomgyu doesn’t trust his own voice at that moment, so he ends up nodding in agreement. The last thing he sees is Yeonjun’s face approaching his, before he closes his eyes and can only feel hyung’s lips on his, tasting of the drink he had just ingested.
Holy shit.
Beomgyu’s first love just gave him his first kiss.
////
Yeonjun is very happy with his life at the moment.
He’s getting good grades, his part-time job is paying well, his friends are cool and he also has a cute boyfriend that he can take on dates once in a while.
Everything is very great, except for the feeling that things will go down as soon as Yeonjun comes clean about that one situation involving a letter and the syllable of someone else’s name.
See, Yeonjun is not a coward, but the fact that it’s been months since the misunderstanding about his sister’s letter started and he didn’t even talk with her or Beomgyu about it might suggest the opposite.
Well, anyway, since things are okay for now, Yeonjun decides that he still has a bit of time to plan how to confess the truth to Beomgyu. To confess how at first he didn’t have a crush on him at all, but now he’s really head over heels in love with him.
First, he needs to have a talk with his sister (and she’ll be really mad) to tell her about the letter he found and that he’s dating her crush now.
Oh, yeah. Yeonjun is in for a wild ride now.
Since he’s been keeping these secrets from the two (his sister and Beomgyu), Yeonjun wasn’t able to invite Beomgyu over yet, and he feels very sad about that. Talking with his sister will make it easier for him to bring Beomgyu over and then explain everything when he meets Yeonhee.
Yep. Everything will work out really well and Yeonjun won’t have any more secrets after that.
In one of these weekends where Yeonjun didn’t have to work and his sister didn’t go out with her friends, Yeonjun decides to rip off the band-aid at once.
He knocks on his sister’s bedroom door, and she opens it not too long after.
“Oppa, do you want something?” She asks, leaning against the door.
“Can I come in? I need to talk to you about something.”
“Sure…”
Yeonjun gets comfortable on the chair at the desk, while Yeonhee lies down on her bed, looking at him.
“What happened?”
Instead of starting talking, Yeonjun takes the piece of paper he’s had for some time now and throws it at his sister’s bed. Yeonhee stares at him confusedly, until she seems to recognize what it is and blushes.
“Where did you find this? Why do you have it?” She asks surprised.
“It was in the middle of my books,” Yeonjun answers. “My friends found it but I kept it for you and forgot to give it back…”
“Your friends?” Her face pales. “Did any of them read it?”
“No,” Yeonjun reassures her. “They only read the name. I grabbed it before anyone else could read, and I figured it was yours so I didn’t read it too…”
Yeonhee gives a relieved sigh.
“Thanks…” She puts the piece of paper against her heart.
“Gyu, huh,” He starts, “when did you start writing love letters for people? Aren’t you too young for that still?”
“Shut up,” Yeonhee rolls her eyes at Yeonjun. “I’m not a kid and it’s not a love letter, it’s just… I have someone I admire so I just thought I’d write about it… I didn’t intend to send it to them.”
“Oh,” Yeonjun looks at her, “are you sure it’s not a crush or anything? And who’s this guy anyway, is it someone I know?”
Is it my boyfriend by any chance?
“It’s not a crush!” She denies it quickly, “they are from my class, so of course you don’t know them,” she affirms.
From her class?
“From your class?” Yeonjun asks to be sure. “Are you sure it isn’t someone who tutors you, someone called Beomgyu?”
Yeonhee furrows her eyebrows.
“It’s not Beomgyu-oppa,” she laughs. “He’s part of your group of friends, so of course I wouldn’t be interested in him!”
“Hey, what do you mean by that?”
“Exactly what you thought I did.”
“This is rude,” Yeonjun points at her, “I’m still your hyung, don’t forget!” He stands up from the chair and uses his hand to poke her head. “And Beomgyu’s cute.”
There isn’t any need for him to add that part, but Yeonjun feels that it’s very important for their conversation. Especially now that he knows that his sister’s Gyu isn’t the same as his Gyu.
“He’s cute, but not my type,” she shrugs. “He seems more like your type, though…” She looks at him suspiciously.
“How do you know what my type is? I never talk about this stuff with you,” Yeonjun questions her.
“I don’t know, I feel like you’re into cute people who’re funny,” she explains.
“Well…”
She’s got a point, though.
The two stay silent for a while, and Yeonjun decides to tell his sister the whole story. He’s dying to talk about it with someone before he tells it to Beomgyu. He won’t tell her they’re boyfriends however, since he and Beomgyu haven't told their families yet.
“You know, something funny happened with me and Beomgyu because of this letter of yours,” Yeonjun starts talking again, moving to lie down beside his sister on her bed.
Yeonjun and Yeonhee are big teenagers already, but they still fit in the same bed, just like they used to share one when they were younger. Yeonjun sometimes misses the feeling of being the older brother who protected his little scaredy sister. She’s grown up so much now – and so did he.
“What is it?” Yeonhee asks excitedly, “what does my letter have to do with it?”
Yeonjun explains it from the beginning.
How it was in the middle of his books (“Oh, I think I was using your books to study and put it in there unconsciously”) and how Kai found it. He tells her about the way he lied that it was his letter and that he was the one who had a crush on a Gyu – and how Kai concluded that it was the Beomgyu.
“Kai-oppa is a menace,” Yeonhee interrupts Yeonjun, laughing to herself. “But I’m glad that you didn’t say it was mine… Not that I’d have minded, but teenage boys love to tease girls about stuff like that. Since they thought it was yours they wouldn’t tease you too much…”
“True,” Yeonjun agrees, lying on his back to stare at the ceiling.
He tells Yeonhee about the way his friends unintentionally talked about his ‘crush’ with one of Beomgyu’s friends and how it ended in Beomgyu’s ears. How his own friends left the two alone and then Beomgyu ended up asking him out because of it.
“Ohhh, so Beomgyu-oppa confessed to you? What did you do?” She sits on the bed. “Did you tell him the truth?”
“No,” Yeonjun groans and shakes his head. “I should’ve done that, right? But no… I accepted it since he was very cute and honest,” he sighs fondly remembering the day it happened.
How far have they come after that, huh? Now they are going out for real, with feelings from both sides and Yeonjun’s pretty sure he’s the one who’s the craziest about Beomgyu.
“Uhm, so you just went out with him after that?”
“Yep.”
“Does he know now that it all started because of a misunderstanding?”
“No.”
“Oh.” Yeonhee’s eyebrows are lifted. “Don’t you think it’s time to let him know, though? Like… I’d be pretty mad if I discovered something like that after so much time.”
“I know, and I want to talk to him about it soon,” Yeonjun says tiredly. “I just wanted to talk with you first since it had to do with you at the beginning,” he adds. “I was prepared for you to be cursing me when you learned that I was dating your crush,” he laughs to himself.
“Dating?” Yeonhee almost shouts, “wait, so you’re together until now?”
“Yes.”
“But he still doesn’t know the truth?” She screeches, and Yeonjun gives a whine.
“...No,” he says ashamedly.
Yeonhee hits him with a pillow.
“Oppa!” She says with a judgemental tone, “you must tell him! And if you don’t like him like that you should also stop leading him on!”
“I’m not leading him on!” Yeonjun protests. He likes Beomgyu! “I just didn’t find the right time to talk to him about this yet.”
“Okay, I’ll give you the benefit of doubt,” Yeonhee scrutinizes him. She then snaps her fingers. “Can’t you invite him here so you can explain it to him in a place that’s comfortable for you? And then you can call me if you want me to tell him about my letter too…”
“Oh…” Yeonjun stares at Yeonhee for a while. It’s not a bad idea. “I’ll think about it,” he tells her. “Maybe next weekend I could call him over to tell him everything…”
“Do it!” Yeonhee suggests in support. “Then you two can have a new relationship that isn’t born out of a misunderstanding!” She nods happily.
“Yeah,” Yeonjun agrees. “I can’t wait until everything works out.”
////
Beomgyu can’t contain his happiness as he walks to Yeonjun (his boyfriend’s!!!) house that weekend after exams week. He feels as if he’s on cloud nine, and it’s been hard to contain his smile whenever he thinks about going to hyung’s house.
Since they live a bit close to each other, it doesn’t take long for Beomgyu to get there, and as soon as he knocks on the door he hears someone saying “wait!” before the door opens and a girl appears.
“Yeonhee, hi,” Beomgyu greets. He remembers Yeonjun’s sister from the times he tutored her on the final exams at the end of last term. It’s been some time since he’s taught her and they don’t meet much at school since their classrooms are far from each other.
“Beomgyu-oppa, hello!” She waves excitedly, “please, come in! Yeonjun-oppa is waiting for you!” She smiles knowingly, “he’s been trying a lot of clothes to see which one you’d like better so this is why he’s taking so long to come down!”
Unintentionally, Beomgyu feels his face get warm, thinking about Yeonjun getting ready for him and Yeonhee teasing her brother about it. He ends up silently entering the house, mumbling a “thanks for having me” and then looking around the living room.
Having small talk with Yeonhee, Beomgyu doesn’t know how much time passes until Yeonjun arrives at where they are.
“Gyu-ah!” Yeonjun says a little out of breath and hugs Beomgyu before seemingly remembering that they aren’t alone. He lets go of Beomgyu and nods at his sister.
Yeonhee nods back at him, and then she excuses herself to her room.
“Let’s go to my room, then?” He holds his hand out for Beomgyu to take. After Beomgyu takes it, he gives him a small smile, “I have something I want to talk with you about…”
“Okay,” Beomgyu followed him silently, noticing that Yeonjun seemed to be a bit nervous. His hands are sweaty and he also has a more serious expression than the one he usually wears.
The two boys sit on the floor, and Beomgyu can’t really pay attention to his surroundings as he is worried about what Yeonjun-hyung wants to tell him. It seems a bit urgent.
“Gyu, I have something to confess to you,” Yeonjun says, holding Beomgyu’s hand gently.
Beomgyu stares at him bemusedly. Confess? Didn’t they go through this already?
Well. If Beomgyu thinks about it, Yeonjun didn't confess to him directly, did he? So is he going to do this now?
Beomgyu squeezes Yeonjun’s hand in support.
Yeonjun squeezes back weakly, before releasing his hand. He gets up, grabs something from a nearby desk and then sits beside Beomgyu again. He puts it on the coffee table and waves at Beomgyu to get it.
The piece of paper seems a bit crumbled up, but what catches Beomgyu’s attention is the “Gyu” followed by a heart written on it.
Gyu… Could it be… him?
“This is the letter that Kai found in my room sometime ago,” he starts explaining. “He asked me about it and then I said it was mine.. “
“Oh,” Beomgyu stares at Yeonjun again. “Is this how they found out that you were interested in me?”
“Yes,” Yeonjun answers with a nod, “but the thing is… This isn’t mine.”
“No?”
“It's my sister’s,” Yeonjun answers truthfully. “She left it with my books so it fell out when the boys were going through my things,” he explains. “But I didn’t want to expose her feelings so I lied to them saying I was the one who wrote it.”
“I see,” Beomgyu furrows his eyebrows and looks at the letter again. “What does that have to do with me? Does your sister like me too?”
“I thought so at first,” Yeonjun confesses, “but I didn't know for sure until some days ago when she said she didn’t.”
“You were surprised by the letter and confessed you liked me even though you thought your sister liked me?” Beomgyu huffs a laugh.
“No,” Yeonjun says in a serious tone. “Gyu-ah,” he sighs. Then holds Beomgyu’s hand again, “actually, I–I wasn’t interested in you like that at the time… I lied about the letter and about having a crush on you.”
“What?” Beomgyu stares at him in disbelief.
What does it all mean…?
“I only knew you from the times we hung out with the boys and from Yeonhee talking about her tutor,” Yeonjun goes on, “I thought you were cool and stuff but I didn’t feel anything more at first. I’m sorry, Gyu.”
“Oh,” Beomgyu lets out, not sure of what else he can say, since words leave his mind at the moment. He releases Yeonjun’s hand.
Yeonjun didn’t like him?
“If you didn’t like me,” Beomgyu gulps loudly, “then why did you accept going out with me?” He asks. “Why didn’t you tell me that it was a misunderstanding?”
Why did Yeonjun let Beomgyu make a fool of himself like that in front of him?
“I don’t know why–I–you asked me out so I thought, why not?” Yeonjun says quickly, “I thought you were interesting and you were cute and you wanted to date me, so there wasn’t anything weird with that!” He shakes his head, “and I didn’t tell you because I didn’t know how to before… But then I realized that I shouldn’t keep it from you anymore and this is why I’m talking about it now.”
“But you didn’t like me,” Beomgyu repeats his earlier words, this time without making it into a question. He has his answer now, doesn’t he?
“I didn’t at the beginning,” Yeonjun confirms, “but then we started going out for real and I became so infatuated with you, Gyu-ah,” he adds in what seems to be a desperate tone of voice.
Beomgyu looks down at his own hands and laughs to himself a bit, running one of said hands over his face in despair.
So all this time it was him running after Yeonjun-hyung and Yeonjun only following him and his feelings? Does the infatuation that Yeonjun-hyung feels ever mean that he wants them to be boyfriends, or is he only doing it still because of Beomgyu’s feelings?
“Gyu-ah, I’m sorry,” Yeonjun apologizes again, trying to approach Beomgyu, “I’m really sorry. And I also really like you, I want you to believe that now… I know that what I did wasn’t good, but I swear I never meant to hide it from you and hurt you…”
“But you still hurt me, hyung,” Beomgyu looks up to stare at Yeonjun. He is sure that the corners of his eyes are red, but he doesn’t care much about it now. “How can I be sure that you mean it when you say you like me now if it all started with you lying?”
Yeonjun-hyung flinches at that, and he mumbles Beomgyu’s name again before going silent once more.
Hyung might like him, this is true, but Beomgyu thinks that he has the right to feel aggrieved about that. His boyfriend only became his boyfriend because of a misunderstanding… Beomgyu feels his heart being squeezed inside of his chest thinking about it.
“I’m not lying, Gyu-ah, I lo—” Yeonjun stops, probably trying to think better on what to say. “I’m sorry but I understand if you can’t be okay with it right now…” He gives a humorless laugh. “I just hope I didn’t ruin everything and that we can still be together after this… I like you so much,” he says breathlessly.
Beomgyu feels that if he stays here a bit more he’ll end up doing something he’ll probably regret later – such as fighting with Yeonjun-hyung or even forgiving him already – so he decides to go home and lick his own wounds alone.
“I need some time to think, hyung,” Beomgyu says finally, staring at Yeonjun’s face.
“I see,” Yeonjun-hyung nods, and his eyes tear up a bit.
Although it also makes Beomgyu sad, he won’t let himself be swayed by that now. He’s pretty sure his own eyes are very red and that he’s cried already, so he can’t focus only on hyung’s feelings right now.
“I will go home now,” Beomgyu announces after that. He grabs his things silently, while Yeonjun only watches him. “Thanks for having me, hyung. Goodbye.”
Beomgyu doesn’t remember if Yeonjun-hyung says goodbye or not, he doesn’t even think about saying bye to Yeonhee, he simply runs home to take some time away from all he’s learned these last few moments.
Well. So first love could hurt this bad, huh?
/////
Supporting his head on his forearms, Yeonjun stares out at the class window, looking for a head of dark medium hair in the sports field. When he sees the one he wants, his heart hurts and he gives a big sigh, loud enough to grab the attention of his close classmates.
“What was that?” Soobin asks from behind Yeonjun’s school desk.
“It’s Yeonjunie’s lovelorn sigh,” Wooyoung, sitting in front of Yeonjun, explains.
“Oh,” Soobin says after a while. “I see now. Hyung’s looking at his boyfriend again, right?”
“Yep,” Wooyoung says, emphasizing the ‘p’. “Even if you guys are fighting, you still can’t stop looking for him, huh?” He pokes at Yeonjun’s forehead.
Yeonjun bats at his hand, before giving another sigh.
His boyfriend is mad at him. He hopes he dies.
(Not seriously. But, damn, if he doesn’t relate to that twitter post right now.)
“Why don’t you try making up if you miss him so much?” Soobin asks, giving a sigh of his own.
It’s been more than a week since Yeonjun told Beomgyu the truth about the letter, and the two of them haven’t talked since. Yeonjun misses seeing Beomgyu smiling at him everyday at the school entrance, misses Beomgyu’s messages to him and especially misses being with him.
“I’ll wait until he’s ready,” Yeonjun answers Soobin. His friends also know the whole story now, so they understand as well why Yeonjun is suddenly alone (without his boyfriend) on his lunch breaks again. “Ugh, but I miss him so much it’s making me mad,” he groans loudly, burying his face in his arms once more.
He wants to hold Gyu-ah again, wants to kiss him, wants to tell him how much he likes him… Ugh, he should’ve just said all that at the beginning! If so, Beomgyu’d probably be looking at him from where he were, waving animatedly at Yeonjun like he did before they had that talk.
Soobin gave some pats on Yeonjun’s back in support, and Wooyoung told him that things would be fine soon. The year was already ending, so Beomgyu and Yeonjun probably would solve everything before it was time for Yeonjun to graduate…
Oh, damn. Yeonjun didn’t even think about the fact that this was his last year with Beomgyu at the same school! Can’t he repeat one more year to stay with him?
Some more days pass as Yeonjun keeps crying about missing Beomgyu to everyone who knows him. Even Taehyun and Kai, who are mostly Beomgyu’s friends, are fed up with Yeonjun now.
Yeonjun is surprised, though, when the boys decide to arrange another meetup next weekend, and even Yeonjun confirms his presence there. Yeonjun, of course, agrees as well, thinking to himself that even if he and Beomgyu don’t exchange words, at least they’ll be at the same place again. He can have his fill of Beomgyu even if from a distance… It’s enough for now.
What Yeonjun doesn’t expect is that arriving at the meeting place, only Beomgyu’s already there. He looks handsome as always, and Yeonjun even adjusts his posture a bit before coming near him.
“Gyu-ah, hi,” Yeonjun greets with a smile.
He’s acting in a very normal way, of course. Not like he’s trying too hard or anything.
“Yeonjun-hyung,” Beomgyu nods at him, a small smile on his face as well.
Yeonjun hasn’t seen that smile directed at him for so long, he almost cries at that.
“Where are the others? I thought I was too late but we’re the only ones here…” Yeonjun asks, trying to keep the conversation going so that he can hear more of Beomgyu’s voice.
“I don’t know. They should’ve been here already…”
Before either of them can do anything, both of their smartphones light up with notifications at the same time.
They look at each other before unlocking their respective phones to see what’s probably the same message from their group chat.
Soobin is talking about how he can’t go on the outing today and Taehyun and Kai don’t even try to pretend to be busy as well, simply saying that they’re the same as Soobin – unavailable.
Yeonjun is going to kill them all.
“Ah,” Beomgyu gives a sigh, before locking his phone again. “So… It’s just the two of us, huh?”
Yeonjun puts his phone in his pocket, before staring at Beomgyu.
“Yeah,” he agrees. Then he scratches his head, “you know what… If you feel uncomfortable with me, we can cancel it,” he offers. “I swear I didn’t do anything this time.”
“I know,” Beomgyu says, “I think it was probably Kai’s idea,” he smiles fondly. “Ugh, he loves meddling in stuff like this.”
“Ah, yes, I know it well,” Yeonjun complains, remembering how Kai was the one who first suggested Beomgyu’s name for Yeonjun’s crush at the time.
“We should still enjoy the day, though,” Beomgyu says, “especially because we have the tickets for the arcade already.
“True.”
“And hyung?” Beomgyu stared at Yeonjun again. “You don’t make me uncomfortable, okay?”
“Okay,” Yeonjun nods stupidly. Does it mean that he still has a chance? “Cool. Alright,” he answers calmly.
Beomgyu laughs at him, before mumbling a ‘let’s go’ and walking towards the arcade.
Yeonjun grins at that and it’s hard to take the smile off his face for a long while after that.
Since their friends didn’t come together with them, Yeonjun and Beomgyu kept playing games that only allowed two players, and so they didn’t feel like spending much time on each game.
Yeonjun is having the time of his life every time Beomgyu laughs at him after defeating him in a game, or when he pouts at Yeonjun after losing one. He wants to take Beomgyu in his arms and squeeze him hard from the amount of love he feels for him at every expression.
He’s so corny… But it’s okay, Yeonjun guesses, since Beomgyu deserves to be loved like this.
After some time playing, Yeonjun and Beomgyu decide to stop by a cafe to eat something. They end up asking to take things home, since the place is too crowded and there’s a park nearby where they can eat comfortably as well.
At the park, Beomgyu and Yeonjun are sitting in the grass, sharing the snacks they bought and drinking the beverages they ordered too. While eating, they can’t help but talk about the new volume of the manhwa they both like, what they think of the protagonist and the decisions in the last chapter.
Yeonjun is so happy about that, so happy about being able to talk with Beomgyu about their common interests again, that he briefly forgets that the reason they didn’t talk about this before is because they sort-of-fought. When he remembers about it, the excitement dies down a little and gives space to the longing he’s been feeling since Beomgyu asked for a time.
When the two get silent a bit, Yeonjun takes the opportunity to apologize once more.
“Gyu-ah, I’m sorry again,” Yeonjun says. “I’m sorry I hurt you and that I lied to you. I should’ve told you about the letter when we started dating and not too long after that…”
“You really should have,” Beomgyu agrees with a serious face.
“I know you still need time, but I wanted to say that again because I don’t want you to cry or suffer because of me anymore,” Yeonjun nods at Beomgyu. “I want you to be happy.”
“Uhm, but what if I want something really difficult to make me happy… What will you do?”
“I will try to get it for you, of course?!”
Beomgyu laughs hard at that. He puts his face on his hands and leans down a bit.
“Beomgyu?!” Yeonjun asks worriedly.
“Ahh,” Beomgyu gives a long sigh, “hyung is actually really cute, you know?”
Yeonjun feels like he’s played right where Beomgyu wanted him too, but he doesn’t feel very mad at that. Especially because Beomgyu is still looking at him with his happy smile.
“Hyung, I was thinking that I already had enough time to think things through,” Beomgyu starts explaining. “I know things didn’t start well between us, but I also thought about all the fun times we had ever since we started to date, and I couldn’t find a lie on them…”
“Yeah… Because it was real, wasn’t it?”
“Exactly,” Beomgyu smiles at him. “Things could’ve been done differently, but I’m happy that we like each other for real.”
Oh, yes. They really did like each other a lot, huh?
“Does it mean that I’m your boyfriend again? Just to be clear…” Yeonjun asks suddenly.
Beomgyu laughs again, and instead of answering with words, he jumps on Yeonjun’s body to hug him. The two boys end up falling over each other, with Yeonjun with his back on the ground.
“Yeah, hyung,” Beomgyu agrees. “But we never stopped being boyfriends, though. At least not for more than a week… After I forgave you, I think I enjoyed watching you suffer a bit…”
“Choi Beomgyu, you?!” Yeonjun stares at him in disbelief, before pulling the other boy’s hair a bit. It’s too gentle to be considered anything more than playful flirting. He kisses Beomgyu quickly, minding the other people around them. “We’re back to disrespecting hyung time again, I see?”
“You wouldn’t have me any other way, right?” Beomgyu smirks at him, before letting out a “Yeonjun-ah.”
Yeonjun’s punishment consists of turning their positions around and having Beomgyu under him while he tickles and pinches everywhere of his boyfriend’s body he can touch. Beomgyu ends up promising Yeonjun that he won’t call him ‘Yeonjun-ah’ again, while Yeonjun tells him he doesn’t believe it one bit.
The day ends with the reconciliation between the two, but they don’t tell their friends any of that. They can wait a bit more to know the truth since they meddled a bit too much now…
(In the future, Yeonjun is able to make Beomgyu happy in what remains of his last year of high school. He does it when it comes to Beomgyu’s last year too. And in a lot of years after that…)