Archive of Our Own

Hong Joshua was not a jealous man.

If anything he was the most patient, gentle, and obliging person Jeonghan had ever met. He was grateful for it because his boyfriend was amazing in every sense of the word. However…there is a part of Jeonghan that wishes that the younger was not always so calm and understanding.

Call him crazy if you want (Lord knows that Seungkwan did many a time) but sometimes Jeonghan felt that he and Joshua were in two completely different phases of their relationship. Jeonghan’s love for the younger was intense, like nothing he had ever felt before. It had him constantly craving Joshua’s attention, wanting to be in his space, always wanting to have some kind of physical contact. Being around Joshua left him with the highest high and being away from him felt like torture subsequently the intensity of his feelings often left him with a sense of possessiveness that was completely foreign to him, He craved his boyfriend’s attention, and that made him jealous of anyone that took it away from him. He felt ridiculous, like a child who can’t stand seeing their favorite person playing with someone else.

As he watched Joushua playing around with Seokmin he felt two very conflicting feelings. First, he felt infinitely fond of his boyfriend and his friend. He adored them both and seeing them goofing around was always amusing to him but beneath that fondness was an underlying sense of jealousy creeping into his bones. Joshua was so pretty. His smile…. God his smile and those eyes, Jeonghan could get lost in them. They always sparkled. How were they that shiny anyway?

Sighing to himself Jeonghan nursed his drink, a small petulant pout on his lips because it had been fifteen minutes since his boyfriend last looked at him, and if the younger didn’t give him any attention right this second Jeonghan was sure that he would shrivel up and die. Just as he’s about to huff in annoyance and throw (yet another) tantrum, he feels a large hand come to rest on the nape of his neck. Turning his face he realizes that Joshua seems to have absentmindedly reached out for him, massaging Jeonghan’s neck with the gentlest of touches, even as he is still immersed in conversation with Seokmin. Jeonghan unwittingly relaxes, leaning into the touch. When he eventually rests his head on Joshua’s shoulder the other finally looks at him with nothing but fondness in his eyes and the softest of smiles on his lips. It is enough to get Jeonghan to forget about the absurd train of thought that occupied his mind for the last hour and a half because at that moment all he saw was Joshua

OoooO

That doesn’t mean that he stops thinking about it. In fact, one (Seungkwan) would argue that for someone in a happy relationship, Jeonghan sure does spend a lot of time worrying about stupid shit. It doesn’t feel stupid though. It was not like he expected Joshua to be possessive over him or fight off every other man and woman who hit on him- and there were a lot, but the man did not react at all! No matter how many times another man would hit on Jeonghan in Joshua’s presence, or a pretty girl would bat their eyelashes at him all the while Joshua was right next to him, the younger would just smile teasingly at him and quirk his eyebrows in amusement.

He found it amusing! Meanwhile, Jeonghan constantly fights back the urge to glare at the many, many men and women who would shamelessly check out his oblivious boyfriend right in front of him! It didn't help that said boyfriend was extremely handsome and had a smile that could steal your breath away and always smelt so good and had the sexiest voice with his stupid American accent and-and – fuck he loved him so much damn it!

Was Jeonghan toxic? Was dating a man who appeared to be the greenest of all green flags finally helping him realize that he himself might be a walking red flag? What kind of grown-ass man wants their boyfriend to get jealous? Jeonghan, apparently.

Maybe Seungkwan was right, and he did need therapy either way these thoughts had been slowly culminating in his mind for a long time. It all comes to a head on a random Friday night. They’re at a club, their entire circle of friends present on a rare night when all their schedules don’t conflict (because trying to make plans for thirteen men with full-time jobs and responsibilities was even more chaotic than a group chat with said thirteen men).

The club buzzes with electricity, and a remixed pop song blasts in the background as they down their shots. Jeonghan is having a good time. His head is fuzzy as he sips his drink, Joshua is seated beside him. Their booth is packed so tightly together that their thighs are touching, Joshua is a welcome warmth beside him, a comforting presence to ease his anxiety that always seems to flare up in crowded places. The rest of their friends are all happily drinking and trying to talk over the loud blaring music and each other. As is the norm whenever they all hang out, it is very loud and very chaotic, and not for the first time Jeonghan wishes that they hung out at one of their apartments instead of a dark, crowded room filled with sweaty strangers, but Chan had whined and pouted at him and Jeonghan could never say no to the baby. So here they are and although Jeonghan is notorious for being a homebody he would never say no to spending quality time with his closest friends.

Joshua nudges him slightly breaking him away from his thoughts. He narrows his eyes at him and nudges back playfully. The younger smiles at him so beautifully that for a moment the crowd seems to disappear and just like before all that he can see is his Joshua. He blinks slowly at his boyfriend and leans into him a little more, basking in the breathy little laugh that the other lets out.

“Tired already?” Joshua whispers into his ear

Jeonghan barely suppresses a shiver, he looks up from where his head had been lazily resting on Joshua’s shoulder and pouts in offense.

“Are you mocking me Joshuji?” he asks sulkily.

“Aren’t I always?” Joshua teases

Jeonghan sniffles and makes a show of being deeply hurt but really, it's just an excuse to nuzzle up into his boyfriend’s personal space. He hides his face in the crook of Joshua’s neck, thrilled at the way the younger's breath seems to stutter.

“Yeah, you’re always mean to me. Be honest Shuji-yah you hate me, don’t you?!” he whines.

Joshua tilts his face toward him with a large hand. He cups Jeonghan’s face delicately in his hands and smirks. Jeonghan swallows, his face flushing in shyness. The tips of his ears burned hot, his eyes automatically zeroing in on Joshua's plump lips. That just causes Joshua’s smirk to widen.

” Do you see the pure hatred in my eyes?” Joshua teases once again, leaning his forehead against Jeonghan’s.

Jeonghan suddenly feels incredibly shy. Joshua’s eyes hold a lot of emotions, but hatred is and will probably never be one of them. Partly because his gaze is currently fixed on Jeonghan and partly because his kind-hearted Joshua could never hate anyone. What Jeonghan does see in Joshua’s eyes is the playfulness and the fondness that shines in the gleam of those pretty brown eyes.

“Are you a pervert?” Jeonghan huffs to hide his shyness.

That makes Joshua laugh, his eyes widening in the way they always do when he’s about to say something completely unhinged. Everyone always accused Jeonghan of thriving on chaos and mischief, but little do they know that Jeonghan has met his match in a certain Hong Joshua, and true to form, Joshua leans in and whispers in his sweet soft voice:

“Says the one who can’t go two days without having sex.”

“Yah!” Jeonghan exclaims, his face heating up in embarrassment.

His little outburst has garnered the attention of Mingyu beside him who leans in to enquire if everything is alright.  Jeonghan can barely sputter out an affirmation that he is perfectly fine, his face is beet red and Joshua- that fucker just laughs obnoxiously beside him. Once Mingyu’s concern dies down Jeonghan turns to the devil that is his other half and glares.

“I’m going to get another drink” Jeonghan announces to no one in particular.

He squeezes past Joshua purposefully stepping on his toe in retaliation (not too hard because he would never hurt his Joshuji). Joshua watches him go with a satisfied look on his face and Jeonghan feels even more flustered as he feels his lover's gaze burn into his skin. The short trip from their little booth to the bar is stuffy and uncomfortable as he squeezes past a crowd of bodies pressing up against him a bit too close for comfort, but it allows him some time to think about how he will get back at Joshua for flustering him in public.

When he finally gets to the bar it takes him another few minutes to flag down the bartender and he pointedly ignores the flirtatious look that the bartender gives him. He turns around nonchalantly and squints his eyes trying to get a visual of their booth, what he sees is a somewhat unexpected sight. Their booth seems to have emptied quite a bit. On his way back to his friends he spots some of them dancing in a small circle, oblivious to their surroundings. It makes him smile fondly but his smile soon disappears when he finally reaches their booth.

While most of their friends have left to dance it seemed that some stayed behind, but that wasn’t necessarily unusual. The thing that took Jeonghan aback was the presence of four women who had not been there before. There’s a pretty bleached blonde who sits next to Soonyoung hanging off every word that he says. Seungcheol also seemed to have found himself a companion who smiled shyly at him as he leaned in to whisper something in her ear, but Jeonghan barely paid his friends and their newfound friends any mind. Because sitting on either side of Joshua are two extremely attractive women.

Jeonghan doesn’t miss the way that the one sitting on Joshua’s right eyes seem to widen when they land on him. The woman on Joshua’s left however is completely unbothered by his presence. Joshua glances up at him and Jeonghan makes a point of not sitting next to the woman on the right instead he sits on one of the singular chairs on the opposite side of their little table. Taking his seat he sips on his drink and tries his hardest not to let his jealousy show but it's there. That bitter feeling right in the middle of his chest.

Deep down he knew that Joshua wasn’t the type of guy to two-time, that no matter how much they bickered and got on each other’s nerves Joshua was committed to him and their relationship, and although Joshua would never intentionally lead someone on, he was too friendly to flat out reject their advances and tell them to get lost. That is why even though Joshua’s conversation with the woman sitting next to him was innocent enough, it still rubbed Jeonghan up the wrong way.

Before he realizes what’s happening the woman on the right gets up and occupies the vacant seat beside him. Jeonghan looks at her briefly before going back to sipping on his drink. She smiles at him and pulls her chair closer to his.

“Hi” she greets cheerfully.

Jeonghan nods in greeting. The music is still too loud so his new companion leans in closer to try and strike up a conversation. He obliges half-heartedly but in his peripheral his eyes are fixed on Joshua who seems to have put some distance between him and his new friend. Jeonghan feels some sort of smug satisfaction at that action. ‘That’s right my Joshuji isn’t interested in you’ he thinks to himself, but his relief is short-lived because in the next instance, the woman laughs loudly and places a perfectly, manicured hand on Joshua’s knee and Jeonghan wants to get up and scream ‘I bought him those jeans!’. He doesn’t though because that would be possessive and toxic of him and Joshua deserved to have a boyfriend who trusted him and wasn’t a jealous, possessive child at heart.

So instead of dealing with his feelings and the crushing weight of them he gets up abruptly and downs his drink. Joshua’s eyes widen in surprise, and he looks as if he wants to stand up and say something, but Jeonghan doesn’t give him the chance. He gets up and mumbles that he’s going to dance with the kids. Joshua gapes at him, following blindly after a few seconds but Jeonghan dodges him, easily losing himself in the crowd and for the first time since they got here, he’s thankful for the throng of people that help him disappear. He spots Seokmin and Seungkwan dancing and flings himself on Seokmin. The younger catches him a little stunned at first but he soon melts into the embrace and Seungkwan whines about being left out, so Jeonghan grabs him too and hugs them tightly, closing his eyes to try and ignore the heated gaze that he can feel on his back.

OoooO

Joshua doesn’t really understand what happened. One minute Jeonghan was sitting there across from him as he dodged the not-so-subtle advances of the woman beside him (Bit-na or at least that’s what he thinks her name is) and the next Jeonghan was bolting from his chair and dodging him left and right. To his relief, Jeonghan does in fact end up dancing with the kids. Joshua lets out a relieved breath when he sees Jeonghan in a three-way hug with Seokmin and Seungkwan, relieved that Jeonghan is with people whom he could count on. Not that Jeonghan couldn’t take care of himself but the way that he was acting sets him a little on edge. Joshua tries the rest of the night to corner his boyfriend and get him to talk but the older seems intent on dodging him, always running away whenever he sees Joshua approaching or sitting sandwiched between their friends so that Joshua can’t get to him. Joshua is more confused than he is annoyed, but he figures that Jeonghan just needs some space and that when he is ready, he will come to Joshua on his own.

So he bides his time. Chills with Seungcheol at their booth as the other enjoys his drink. Joshua himself sticks to cola because at least one of them must be sober enough to get everyone home safely and while usually Jeonghan is jointly responsible for shouldering the burden, with the way that the older was knocking back shots Joshua highly doubts that would be the case tonight.

He’s proven right when a few minutes go by, and an exasperated Chan quite literally deposits a drunk Jeonghan onto the cushioned L-shaped sofa of their booth. Jeonghan lays there limply as Chan arranges his body horizontally, trying to get the older into a more comfortable position.

“Woah” Seungcheol comments

Joshua wholeheartedly agrees with that sentiment.

“Is he even breathing?” Seungcheol asks worriedly.

Joshua leaps up and out of his seat in concern. He kneels beside a seemingly unconscious Jeonghan and sighs in relief once he sees the steady rise and fall of his boyfriend’s chest. He turns to Seungcheol and an exhausted Chan who slumps down next to their eldest friend tiredly.

“He’s okay” he assures them.

At the sound of his voice, Jeonghan’s eyes begin to flutter open, half-lidded and heavy as if he could barely even keep them open. He blinks in confusion and then whispers out a barely audible “Shua-yah”. Joshua hums and brushes away the sweaty fringe from Jeonghan’s eyes. He moves swiftly and gently places Jeonghan’s head in his lap.

“Shua-yah” Jeonghan calls out again.

“I’m here Hannie” he leans in and whispers.

Suddenly Jeonghan bolts up nearly knocking their heads together. He looks around frantically and when he finally notices Joshua sitting beside him his eyes immediately turn glassy and he climbs onto Joshua’s lap. Normally this wouldn’t be a problem in fact Joshua loved having Jeonghan straddle him but right now they were out in public with their friends who watched on in amusement as Jeonghan became a human leech, not to mention the eyes of countless strangers who were all watching the scene unfold. Joshua blushes lightly as he tries to pry Jeonghan away from him but the older has taken to burying his face in the crook of Joshua’s neck mumbling indistinctly.

Then he suddenly removes himself from his makeshift hiding spot grabs Joshua’s face in both of his hands and squeezes. Chan lets out a wheeze at his hyung’s indecent behavior, but Joshua doesn’t have the time to think about it because he’s too preoccupied with keeping an eye on Jeonghan, whose eyes are unfocused as they stare into Joshua’s own. Joshua tilts his head to meet Jeonghan’s eyes and the other furrows his brows unhappily.

“Shua- yah” Jeonghan slurs

Joshua can see the metaphorical cogs turning in Jeonghan’s brilliant brain. He knocks their foreheads together with enough force that Joshua worries that both of their foreheads are going to bruise and when he speaks again Joshua can smell the strong scent of liquor on Jeonghan’s breath. It makes him recoil slightly but that only appears to deepen Jeonghan’s turmoil and the older of the two pouts sullenly at him as he pulls back.

“You’re drunk honey.” The petname slips out in English unintentionally.

“M Hannie not h-oney” Jeonghan corrects struggling to pronounce the English word in his inebriated state.

“Mmmm you’re Hannie my honey” Joshua teases.

“No!” Jeonghan protests shaking his head stubbornly.

“No?”

Jeonghan jabs him lightly in the chest and then as if that small action was too draining for him, he immediately burrows himself into Joshua’s body, making himself smaller so that he could fit just right with his head against Joshua’s chest.

“I hate it when-when you do that!” Jeonghan whines

“Do what honey?” Joshua asks gently.

“M’ Hannie” Jeonghan reminds leaning his head in a rather uncomfortable position just so that he can squint his eyes at Joshua.

Joshua chuckles fondly at him leaning down to press a quick kiss to his forehead. Normally he wasn’t someone who was into PDA but with Jeonghan he could never seem to help himself, not when he was this endearing.

“Can I take you home Hannie?”

Jeonghan shakes his head vehemently idly playing with the top two buttons of Joshua’s shirt,

“No?” Joshua asks in surprise.

“I have a boyfriend” Jeonghan mumbles his face deadpan.

Joshua’s entire body shakes with the force of his uncontrollable laughter. Just when he thought his boyfriend couldn’t get any cuter Yoon Jeonghan once again proved him wrong. Joshua smiles fondly at him, unable to resist the urge to tease him.

“Oh yeah? What’s he like?”

Jeonghan seems to give it a moment’s thought and then he confidently says:

“Annoying,” he says with such conviction that Joshua can only stare dumbly at him for a while before a shit-eating grin takes over his face.

“Then why are you with him, honey?”

“Because I love him” This time Jeonghan doesn’t need a moment to think about his reply and Joshua would be lying if he said that, that small detail didn’t make his heart do little loopty loops deep inside his chest.

“What if you break up with him then would you give me a chance?”

Jeonghan once again shakes his head at him.

“Not even then?!” Joshua gasps pouting in feigned offence.

“Can’t sorry.” Jeonghan shrugs

“And why not?” Joshua presses, having way more fun than he would care to admit.

“Not Shua” Jeonghan explains his eyes drooping to the point where Joshua is certain that he might pass out at any given moment and so with his heart full of love and his arm full of Jeonghan, Joshua finally decided to call it a night.

OoooO

He shoots Seungcheol a text, only now realizing that he had been so absorbed in Jeonghan’s antics that he had lost track of every single one of his friends. Seungcheol who is the only other sober person in their group dismisses his apologies with only a little teasing about their little scene. He easily hauls Jeonghan into his car and buckles him up in the passenger seat but when they get to their apartment building, he wakes Jeonghan up so that they can tackle the three flights of stairs together. Jeonghan is still pretty out of it and has a hard time standing upright so Joshua steadies him with a hand around his waist.

“Stupid stairs!” Jeonghan yells when they get to the second flight of stairs. Joshua can’t help but agree and they both take a breather before continuing carefully up the last flight of stairs.

When they finally get to their apartment door Jeonghan is completely leaning all his weight on Joshua as the other opens the door for them. Joshua flicks on the lights while Jeonghan stumbles around in the dark.

“Take off your shoes” Joshua reminds.

“Fucking Shoes! I hate shoes!” Jeonghan grumbles leaning down to take off his shoes and getting even more agitated when they refuse to come off. He tumbles forward and slumps on the floor screaming in frustration. Joshua watches his tantrum calmly, quite used to Jeonghan’s weird habit of getting angry at inanimate objects. He stalks forward calmly and picks Jeonghan up by the hold he has under his armpits and helps the older to lay on the couch with his feet resting on Joshua’s lap. Joshua slowly begins untying the laces of Jeonghans sneakers and gently sets them on the floor to deal with him later, he then takes off Jeonghans socks and gives them the same treatment.

His thumb presses into the arch of Jeonghan’s foot and the older man lets out an ‘ah’ sound that has Joshua’s lips quirking slightly. He continues to massage Jeonghan’s foot gently until the other presses the big toe of his other foot into Joshua’s side. It’s only then that Joshua notices the look that Jeonghan has been giving him the entire time.

At the club, the older seemed to be completely wasted and he still seemed to be highly intoxicated but this time he eyed Joshua pensively. His eyes are lidded which makes them look even more sultry and seductive. Joshua pretends not to be affected by it as he continues to massage Jeonghan’s foot.

“Joshuji” Jeonghan calls out softly. Joshua only hums in response but doesn’t look up.

“Hong Jisoo!” Jeonghan yells. This time Joshua does look at him and Jeonghan must take that as some type of invitation because he crawls forward effectively eliminating any distance between them.

This time when he places himself on Joshua’s lap it feels much more intimate in the privacy of their own home, instead of at a club. Joshua’s hands grip Jeonghan’s waist helping him settle there. He lets his lover caress his face. His eyes close instinctively so that Jeonghan can run a feather-light touch over his eyelashes, those wandering fingertips travel down to the tip of his nose and eventually his lips. Joshua closes his eyes and lets it happen only opening them when he hears another desperate “Shua-yah”.

“What is it, baby?

“Shua-yah” Jeonghan calls out again a little more desperately.

“W-why is it always me? Hm! I hate that it's always me!” Jeonghan rambles nonsensically

“I don’t know what you mean Hannie-OW!”

“Yoon Jeonghan!” he yelps when the older bites his shoulder in retaliation to his seemingly unsatisfactory response. He pulls Jeonghan back by the grip that he has on his hair. The other cranes his neck to glare at Joshua, eyes narrowed in barely concealed annoyance.

“Behave!” he chastises when Jeonghan begins to squirm in his hold. Jeonghan huffs and then goes limp his forehead falling forward to rest on Joshua’s collarbone. Joshua rewards him for his good behavior by patting him on his head.

“What’s gotten into you today?” Joshua gently enquires after a moment of silence.

Jeonghan looked up from where his face had resting on Joshua’s chest. His eyes were still glossy and unfocussed his lips were slightly wobbly. Joshua feels his heart tug with fondness, he swipes away the hair that has fallen onto the elder’s eyes. Jeonghan nuzzles into his touch and then as if deciding that they weren’t already close enough he tries to wiggle closer to Joshua until it feels as if he’s wrapped around Joshua’s entire being.

The younger returns the hug with a small laugh. Jeonghan’s arms loop around his neck and for a moment he thinks that the drunken man might have fallen asleep until he feels a small tug at his ear lobe. He gasps at the sensation of Jeonghan’s mouth sucking on his ear lobe, his body heating up. Jeonghan doesn’t stop there, his sinful lips travel to Joshua,s neck playfully nibbling and sucking as he saw fit. Joshua closes his eyes and loses himself in the sensation, unconsciously letting his head tip backward to allow the other more space. Jeonghan’s lips never stop moving ghosting over his jawline.

“Baby, Hannie wait-” Joshua breathes but Jeonghan pays him no mind instead his hips begin to move in a slow controlled grind and Joshua knows that he needs to put a stop to their activities before his own urges cause him to lose control.

“Fuck- Jeonghannie stop-oh!” his demand is interrupted by a moan, his eyes rolling back when Jeonghan sucks on the sensitive spot just behind his ear whilst grinding harder against his growing hard-on. In the next moment his lips are captured in a kiss, Jeonghan’s mouth is slightly bitter from all the alcohol but still so damn addictive that Joshua completely forgets that he was supposed to be putting a stop to this.

He gives in holding Jeonghan in place by the nape of his neck. The older moans into his mouth and opens it willingly allowing Joshua to lick his fill. Strange how even after two years of dating, Joshua has never once gotten bored of kissing Jeonghan, of being kissed by him, of hearing him moan and pant and call out Joshua’s name. He slows down the kiss trying to calm himself and Jeonghan down and with his hands delicately cupping Jeonghan’s small face he sets a gentler, less hurried pace eventually pulling away.

Jeonghan whines when he does so, his lips are red and bruised and his eyes are wild. A lesser man would have completely ravished him by now, especially with the way that he whines and tries to grind down onto the bulge in Joshua’s jeans, only hindered by the younger’s hand on his hip stopping him from moving, but Joshua could tell that the alcohol had still clouded his boyfriends mind and he would never do anything sexual when it was obvious that Jeonghan wasn’t in his right state of mind. He licks his lips not missing the way that Jeonghan’s eyes follow the movement of his tongue.

“We should stop” he says his voice hoarse.

“But why?!” Jeonghan whines his lips wobbling, he grips Joshua’s brunette locks and knocks their foreheads together.

“Shua-yah don’t -don’t you want me?” he asks desperately peppering Joshua’s face with kisses until eventually his tongue finds its way into Joshua’s mouth, Joshua gives in without a second thought kissing back just as desperately.

“I do want you so-so much- “Joshua breathes kissing at Jeonghans neck after he once again forcefully breaks the kiss. Shivers wrack the elder’s frame at the sensation, and he makes a small sound of relief.

“But you’re drunk” Joshua finishes finally putting some distance between them. His hand on the nape of Jeonghan’s neck keeps him steady and when Joshua looks into the other’s eyes, he sees a vacant look in Jeongan’s eyes. The elder completely detaches from him.

On shaky legs, Jeonghan climbs off Joshua’s lap. Joshua tries to help him, but Jeonghan pushes his hand away slowly stumbling into their bedroom. Joshua follows him, trying his best to ignore his raging boner in favor of taking care of his boyfriend but said boyfriend slams the door in his face.

“Jeonghannie…baby?” he calls out knocking on the door.

“I can’t hear you lalalalala!”

He hears the other yell out through the door, his voice indignant and annoyed. Joshua can almost picture him with his hands over his ears, childishly pretending not to hear Joshua. The younger sighs resting his forehead against the closed door. As much as he wanted to go into their bedroom and talk things out, and get to the bottom of Jeonghan’s erratic behavior, he realized that trying to talk while Jeonghan was still clearly drunk would prove to be pointless. So he decides to let the other sleep it off and talk about it tomorrow. He opens the door as quietly as he can, grateful that Jeonghan didn’t lock it during his little temper tantrum. The room is pitch dark, but he makes out a lump in the center of their bed, completely engulfed by their comforter. Joshua figures that he’s probably passed out already or close to it either that or he’s dead set on ignoring the younger’s existence. With another sigh, Joshua retreats and decides to settle on the couch for the night.

OoooO

Jeonghan woke up alone.

Jeonghan woke up alone, buried under their comforter with a bitch of a headache. He groans and spreads his legs out, trying to piece together all the events of last night, how he ended up alone in his and Joshua’s bed, and where the hell Joshua could possibly be. He remembers being at the club…what happened next? Joshua was with him- yes Joshua was with him, and he was being annoying, and then what happened?

Then it all comes back to him, in bits and pieces. Small fragments of emotions linked to his memories. He remembers the tight feeling in his chest because- because Joshua was flirting with somebody? Jeonghan furrows his brows in confusion ‘No, wait that doesn’t make any sense’ he thinks to himself. Then what-

Suddenly it all comes back to him. The club. The woman at the club. The woman at the club that flirted with Joshua and more shamefully Jeonghan remembers being so overcome by jealousy that he physically ran away from Joshua the entire night. Everything else that happened after is blank.

Jeonghan felt like screaming. God, he was such a dick! Poor Joshua he must have been so confused by Jeonghan’s crazy behavior. Guilt mixed with a hangover is one hell of a combination. He really needs to pull himself together.

Deciding to finally get out of bed he winces with every step, wrapping the comforter around himself like a cocoon. He’s extremely anxious, it doesn’t help that he remembers very little of what happened last night, so he decides to be cautious, maybe step outside for some fresh air and a cup of coffee (he was definitely not running away again). He opens the door to their bedroom as quietly as possible, peaking his head out to see if the coast is clear, and then speed walking to their front door still wrapped in his cocoon.

He almost breathes out an audible sigh once he reaches the door, tapping the pocket of his jeans and thankfully finding his wallet still there, he then begins to frantically search for his shoes which were not in their usual place. He contemplates borrowing Joshua’s but that just seems oddly disrespectful somehow. Just as he’s about to throw caution to the wind and reach out for Joshua’s shoes he is stopped dead in his tracks.

“Yoon Jeonghan”

Jeonghan freezes wrapping the comforter more securely around himself. His strategy is to stay immobile so that he can blend in with his surroundings, and no it doesn’t matter that he’s currently hunched over at the front door, seconds away from stealing his boyfriend’s shoes.

“Are you a statue? Get up” Joshua orders.

‘Well at least he didn’t tell me to turn around.’ Jeonghan thinks to himself.

“Turn around” he commands.

‘Oh come on!’

Jeonghan does so slowly. He can’t bring himself to look Joshua in the eye and when he does finally chance a glance at him, the other is right in front of him. His arms crossed over his chest, he’s still in yesterday’s clothes, and his neck is covered in large purple hickies Jeonghan notes. ‘Did I do that?’ he thinks to himself feeling a sick sense of accomplishment at the sight of his love bites marring Joshua’s flawless skin, which quickly vanishes when their eyes meet and Jeonghan can only flush a deep shade of red at the unimpressed look that Joshua gives him.

“Were you trying to run away?”

“No!” Jeonghan protests. Joshua stares him down his eyes narrowing in disbelief. Jeonghan shrinks into the comforter.

“Yah Yoon Jeonghan you really- “Joshua doesn’t finish his sentence he takes a deep calming breath and moves closer to Jeonghan.

“Don’t you think that we need to talk?” he says it as a question but from the tone of his voice Jeonghan knows that it was more of a command than anything.

“What’s there to talk about?” Jeonghan shrugs lamely.

“I don’t know maybe the fact that you keep running away from me.”

“I – I wasn’t running away.”

“Right.” Joshua says dismissively.

“Joshuji- “

“I made breakfast. Go wash up first.”

Jeonghan stares dumbly at Joshua’s retreating back. Silently hopping his way to the bathroom. Looks like he had no choice but to step out of his cocoon.

Jeonghan returns to the table after washing his face. Joshua subtly checks on him. His eyes are puffy, he has the worst case of bed hair, and at the sight of the food laid out before them, he visibly pales.

“Would you like some eggs?” Joshua asks innocently placing a plate in front of Jeonghan

“Sunny side up. Extra runny” he comments cheerfully leaning his forearms on the kitchen counter and stabbing his fork into them letting the yolk runny messily.

He sees Jeonghan shudder, nauseous at the sight of the bright yellow yolk running on the egg white, its consistency sickening him. Joshua smirks in amusement before deciding to take pity on his boyfriend and taking the plate of eggs away, he may have wanted to get back at his boyfriend for his bad behavior, but he was not cruel.

“Here have some toast” he offers

“Thank you” Jeonghan mumbles meekly accepting the plate that was handed to him.

“How’s your head?”

“Hurts”

“That’s what happens when you try to drink your body weight in alcohol” Joshua chuckles.

Jeonghan isn’t looking at him. He nibbles on his dry toast silently, his shoulders hunched. Joshua can almost see the tension radiating off him. He waits for Jeonghan to say something and when the other remains silent, he sighs long -sufferingly.

“Your shoes are by the couch if you’re thinking about running again.” Joshua says conversationally calmly eating his breakfast.

Jeonghan visibly stiffens.

“I’m sorry” he mumbles head bowed, looking like a guilty puppy.

“I just want to understand what happened.”

“It’s stupid”

“Hannie, we talked about this, I know that talking about your feelings makes you uncomfortable but bottling them up is not healthy.”

The look that Jeonghan gives him is pitiful, his eyes are wide and glossy, and his lip trembles. Joshua can see how guilty he feels but it wasn’t his intention to guilt trip his boyfriend. He knew firsthand how hard it was for Jeonghan to talk about his feelings, oftentimes hiding his true emotions behind his antics, but Joshua could always tell when the other was putting up a front and right now Jeonghan was stripped bare, left vulnerable. They had made great strides in getting Jeonghan to be more open in expressing his feelings and so Joshua didn’t want to push too hard.

Getting up from his seat he walks over to Jeonghan and turns the other's chair to face him. Jeonghan looks up at him with his wide, trusting eyes and Joshua smiles reassuringly at him. He pets Jeonghans head affectionately, and the older man leans into the touch closing his eyes in bliss.

“I’ll run us a bath” Joshua whispers kissing Jeonghans head.

Jeonghan only nods and lets himself surrender.

OoooO

Their bathtub is small. Definitely not designed to fit two grown men but they make it work. Jeonghan lets Joshua take care of him, leaning his head against the younger's chest as he washes his hair. The water splashes as they move, and it leaves them both giggling at how ridiculous they must look. When Joshua is done, he gently rinses Jeonghan’s hair. Jeonghan smirks to himself, an evil idea forming. The next time that Joshua pours water on Jeonghan’s head the older yells dramatically hands falling to his eyes.

“It burns!” he cries out.

Joshua immediately starts sputtering out apologies, trying to turn Jeonghan around so that he can help rinse the shampoo out of his lover’s eyes but when he does successfully turn Jeonghan’s body around he sees that the older is smiling smugly.

“Yoon Jeonghan!”

Jeonghan giggles pressing a sweet kiss to Joshua’s lips in apology, the other only rolls his eyes quite used to Jeonghan’s habit of pranking the people that he loves. Their friends consider it some weird type of love language at this point, the more he loves you the more he will mess with you and Jeonghan loves Joshua the most of all…

“You’re insufferable” Joshua says.

“You’re dating me. So what does that say about you?” Jeonghan retorts

“Apparently that I’m a sucker for punishment.”

“Oooh Joshuji … Kinky I like it!”

“Of course, you would…you’re a sadist.”

Jeonghan reaches down and twists one of Joshua’s nipples in response cackling when Joshua fails to stifle a moan.

“Sadist!” Joshua accuses.

“Masochist!” Jeonghan giggles.

“I guess that means we’re truly meant for each other”

Jeonghan’s entire body warms up from the inside out and he almost feels breathless with how happy that statement makes him. He tries to be nonchalant about it but does a poor job of it so in the end, he can only bury his head against Joshua’s chest to hide his shyness.

“I guess so” he agrees.

OoooO

They don’t talk about it. Joshua doesn’t push him to, not when they’re in the tub, not even when they’re drying off and Joshua is helping Jeonghan blow-dry his hair. They talk about literally everything except what happened. It's only when Joshua goes to retrieve the comforter that Jeonghan had hastily discarded in the hallway leading to their bathroom, that he sees the elder lost in thought.

Joshua still doesn’t push. He smiles sweetly at Jeonghan as the other moves from his cross-legged position to lie on his back. Joshua lays the comforter over him and then slips in beside him. They face each other, locked in a comfortable silence. It’s just past noon and Joshua knows that Jeonghan is probably exhausted so he lets the older cuddle into him. Jeonghan tucks himself underneath Joshua’s chin and the younger holds him tightly.

“My baby” Joshua coos obnoxiously

“Yah!” Jeonghan scolds predictably slapping at Joshua’s chest.

Joshua chuckles at him pressing a kiss to his hair and gently patting his head. Despite his protestation the older goes pliant in his hold, squishing his face in Joshua’s chest and rubbing his face against the fabric of Joshua’s shirt like he was a cat trying to scent his owner. Joshua only huffs in amusement continuing to give him head pats. Suddenly, Jeonghan stills in Joshua’s hold for a moment he thinks that his boyfriend might have fallen asleep but then he hears him mumbling something against Joshua’s chest. Joshua has no idea what he said because Jeonghan’s face is still smushed against his chest.

“What was that Jeonghannie? he asks gently.

Jeonghan makes a sound to show his annoyance, he pulls himself away from Joshua’s chest and glares as if the younger had deeply offended him. Then he pouts and Joshua notices that Jeonghan’s eyes linger on the marks on Joshua’s throat. He touches them with his index finger as if admiring his handiwork. Joshua knows where this is going, well acquainted with the ins and outs of Jeonghan’s complicated personality. He can see that his boyfriend is gathering the courage to speak again and so he is patient, letting Jeonghan’s fingers ghost his neck.

“I said…I was jealous” Jeonghan finally admits, voice quiet almost ashamed.

Joshua doesn’t understand why Jeonghan was ashamed of having a very natural reaction. He knew that Jeonghan was jealous from the moment that the other came back to the booth and saw two women next to him but what Jeonghan didn’t know was that he was upfront with both of those women about being in a relationship and that he had pointed Jeonghan out to them as his boyfriend as soon he saw the elder making his way back to the booth.

“I know…”

Jeonghan’s pout deepens.

“What I want to know is why you ran away from me?” he continues.

“It’s embarrassing” Jeonghan grumbles.

“Tell me anyways”

Jeonghan thinks about it for a moment once again trying to gather his courage, Joshua waits for him to find his words. Brushing his fingers through Jeonghan;s fluffy hair. When Jeonghan looks into his eyes Joshua can see how much he’s struggling with his thoughts, and it breaks his heart a little but all that he could do for Jeonghan was to create a safe space for him to share his feelings.

“You never get jealous” Jeonghan whispers.

Jeonghan’s statement slightly takes Joshua aback.

“Is that what you think honey?”

The tips of Jeonghan’s ears turn pink at the petname- something that he saves for further exploration later. Right now he sits up, forcing Jeonghan to do the same (not without some whining on Jeonghan’s part because the man is almost always in energy-saving mode). They sit cross-legged facing each other.

“Answer me honey” he coaxes.

Jeonghan nods his head.

“And that bothers you? Honey, I know that people always say that you and I are always in tune with one another, but I can’t read your mind. I know it's hard honey, but I’m going to need you to tell me what’s in your heart”

“Sometimes I just- feel like-like I’m the only one like-“

“It's always you…getting jealous” Joshua finishes for him.

Jeonghan nods yet again. Joshua scoots closer to him and holds his hands gently encouraging him to continue. He watches as Jeonghan’s eyebrows furrow in contemplation and squeezes his hand gently urging him to continue.

“I guess I just feel like maybe it’s because I love you more than you love me- which is okay… it just kinda bothers me that’s all” he shrugs.

Joshua immediately pulls him into a hug allowing him to slump against Joshua’s chest. It’s not true. He was crazy about Jeonghan. He grips Jeonghan by the nape of his neck tilting his face until they can make eye contact.

“First of all Hannie it's normal to get jealous and secondly, I get jealous too.”

“No, you don’t “Jeonghan scoffs in disbelief

“Maybe not as much as before but when we first started dating, I used to envy anyone that stole your attention away from me.”

“Then what changed?” Jeonghan whispers, voice small and insecure.

Joshua knows his boyfriend extremely well after two years of dating and three years of friendship before them dating, he knows that to Jeonghan his statement must sound like some sort of confirmation of his feelings for Joshua being stronger than Joshua’s feelings for him, which is ridiculous and couldn’t be further from the truth.

“I fell in love with you” Joshua says it as if it’s the simplest thing in the world and to him it really is.

“Huh?”

Joshua smiles at the total look of confusion on Jeonghan's face, he can’t help himself when he reaches out and pinches the soft skin of his boyfriend’s cheeks. Then he cups both of his large hands around Jeonghan’s delicate face and pretends to think deeply about what he wants to say before continuing.

“I loved you for a long time Jeonghannie. Even when we were just friends. When we started dating, I never expected my feelings for you to grow and become so intense and so at the beginning of our relationship I got easily jealous, I wanted you all to myself, all the time. Do you have any idea how much that scared me?”

Jeonghan can only nod dumbly as if he gets it and, looking at the vulnerability in his eyes, Joshua thinks that he does understand the younger’s feelings all too well.

“Then I realized that I was in love with you and then you told me that you were in love with me too and I don’t remember being that happy before. Suddenly every time I felt myself getting jealous, I would remember the way that you looked at me that night, when you told me that you loved me, and the negative feelings would go away. Yoon Jeonghan, the man that everyone wanted, wanted me. “

“You don’t have to make me sound desperate” Jeonghan grumbles sulkily.

“You don’t want me?” Joshua fake cries his hands dropping from Jeonghan’s face and coming to hide his own as he begins to fake sob. Jeonghan giggles and pries his hands from his face.

“You were saying something important and now you’re playing” Jeonghan accuses with a roll of his eyes.

“Ah! Should I continue?”

Jeonghan nods crawling forward so he can place himself comfortably in Joshua’s lap, his arms looping around the younger’s neck.

“As we progressed in our relationship, I realized it was only natural that all these people would want you. You’re handsome, funny, smart, kind, give good hea- “

He only chuckles when Jeonghan smacks him upside the head.

“Hong Jisoo! You wanna die?”

“At least let me finish before you kill me” Joshua teases and Jeonghan relents going quiet.

“As I was saying. It made sense that everyone would want you, but do you know what Jeonghan-ah?”

“What?”

“Only I get to have you.”

“Cocky bastard” Jeonghan mutters under his breath making Joshua laugh loudly.

“Do you know what else?”

“What?” Jeonghan whispers

Joshua tilts Jeoghans chin so that he can look into his eyes. His eyes land on Jeonghans pouty lips, he stares at them longingly, leaning down to peck at them and then whispering against them:

“Only you get to have me.”

Jeonghan’s breath stutters at that proclamation. Joshua kisses him then, pouring all his love and affection into the kiss until Jeonghan is whimpering at the intensity of it.

“You’re my only” Joshua whispers after breaking the kiss his lips sucking at Jeonghans neck, kissing his way back from Jeonghans jaw to his panting mouth.

“O-only what?” Jeonghan stutters his hands finding purchase in Joshua’s hair as the younger lays them both down caging Jeonghan in between his arms.

“My only everything” Joshua clarifies.

“After tonight whenever you feel jealous, you’re gonna remember this moment” he continues breathing hotly in the minimal space between them. When he pulls back slightly, he smirks at the dazed look in Jeonghan’s eyes.

“Cocky bastard” Jeonghan pants

“Cocky for a reason” Joshua corrects.

“Prove it” Jeonghan challenges.

“Gladly”

OoooO

Joshua was an amazing kisser. Each time they kissed, Jeonghan always felt as if he was being consumed. His toes curled as Joshua’s soft lips met his own and a plush tongue made its way into his mouth. His fingers found purchase in the softness of Joshua’s hair as he was kissed over and over again. He panted when they finally broke apart for air, eyes glazed over in arousal as Joshua continued to ravish him with kisses on his jaw and neck. Joshua was relentless, his lips ghosting over Jeonghan’s most sensitive spots with just enough pressure for it to tingle. It had Jeonghan whimpering embarrassingly loudly, the sound catching Joshua’s attention, the younger taking Jeonghan’s noise of pleasure as an invitation to initiate yet another kiss.

Jeonghan’s head spun with the pure need behind Joshua’s actions as if his boyfriend was pouring every ounce of love and adoration into their kisses. “You’re my only”, Joshua said to him and Jeonghan knew that. He was the only one that Joshua wanted to kiss, to hold, to bicker with and right now it seemed as if Joshua was trying to prove it to Jeonghan. The elder felt it in the way that Joshua cradled his head delicately between his strong arms, the way that their bodies were pressed flush together, the way that he seemed to be intent on coaxing out sounds of pleasure from Jeonghan’s lips. Jeonghan felt all of Joshua’s love for him in those small actions even more so than he usually did on a day-to-day basis.

Eventually, Joshua seemed to run too hot and had no choice but to pull away and discard his shirt and sweatpants. Jeonghan watched proudly as his boyfriend’s beautiful body was revealed to him, when they first met Joshua was roughly the same build as him but now the younger has taken to working out, his body sculpted with light muscles, biceps bulging attractively. He was a vision, and he was all Jeonghan’s.

The younger doesn’t give him much time to admire his sculpted body as if the thought of not being physically close to Jeonghan was torture, Joshua hurried his movements and swooped in for another kiss, his large hands easily maneuvering Jeonghan’s lower body so that he could slip off the elder’s sweats, his lips never once leaving Jeonghan’s. Jeonghan let it happen, his arms encircling Joshua’s neck pulling him even closer, his blunt fingernails running the broad, muscled expanse of Joshua’s back. When Joshua pulls him up to remove his t-shirt and discard it carelessly to the side, Jeonghan notices it.

Teeth marks on Joshua’s left shoulder.

“Jisoo-yah” he gasps sitting up abruptly.

Joshua hums noncommittally as he continues to kiss Jeonghan’s neck forcing the elder backwards. Jeonghan pulls him away by his hair causing Joshua to let out a noise of discontentment at the loss of skin-to-skin. When Jeonghan lets go of his hair Joshua immediately goes back to sucking on his neck.

“Your-your shoulder-” he tries to say through his moans.

This finally causes Joshua to pull away, looking at his own shoulder in confusion and then finally spotting the teeth marks. Jeonghan looks at him in concern but the younger just shrugs it off.

“Does it hurt?” Jeonghan asks worriedly.

Joshua looks at his shoulder for a moment in contemplation, his feline-like eyes sparkle with mischief and then, very theatrically he holds his shoulder and lets out a loud ‘ah’ sound. Jeonghan catches on to Joshua’s little show and decides to play along.

“Does it hurt a lot?” he asks again, his voice laced with fake concern- higher pitched as if he was talking to a child.

Joshua nods with an exaggerated pout on his lips. He’s such a dork, God…Jeonghan loves him so much.

“Oh no!” Jeonghan exclaims switching their positions, gently pushing Joshua to lay on his back. His lips kiss the bruised skin of Joshua’s shoulder not missing the all-too-pleased look that the younger can barely hide.

“There! All better…” he professes.

“Here too” Joshua pouts pointing a little further up his shoulder.

“Oh, you poor baby!” Jeonghan coos immediately kissing the spot that was pointed out to him.

“And here” Joshua whines, this time pointing to his lips his eyes wide filled with faux innocence.

“Here?” Jeonghan asks softly moving closer to his lips.

Joshua nods pitifully.

Jeonghan giggles and presses a quick kiss to Joshua’s lips.

“All better?” he asks softly.

Joshua shakes his head, that obnoxious pout still on his lips. ‘Another one?’ Jeonghan whispers pressing another kiss to Joshua’s lips, and then another until eventually they’re kissing again, Joshua’s large hands holding him in place, caressing his high cheekbones.

“Sorry for biting you,” Jeonghan says sheepishly after they pull away.

“It’s okay I liked it” Joshua teases his thumbs gently rubbing at Jeonghan’s kiss-swollen lips.

“You’re never being those masochist allegations are you Shua?” Jeonghan chuckles kissing the pad of Joshua’s thumbs.

Jeonghan smirks devilishly at Joshua then leans down blowing on Joshua’s erect nipples. Joshua shivers but doesn't stop him, so he continues encircling the left nipple with his tongue and roughly pinching the other. Joshua breathes heavily but he mostly just watches Jeonghan with a look that can be considered way too fond for the position that they’re in. Jeonghan tries to regain some semblance of control over himself, but that flies through the window when he shifts slightly, and his semi-erect cock makes contact with Joshua’s knee. He lets go of Joshua’s nipple and whines at the sensation, and Joshua just watches him that fond look still on his face would it be wrong to admit that the look of pure love on Joshua’s face is turning him on more than the steady rind of his own hips?

“That’s it honey” Joshua whispers voice deep, his hands brushing away the hair that fell over Jeonghan’s eyes

Jeonghan whines at the petname, at the way that Joshua’s voice sounded so attractive whenever he spoke in English.  Jeonghan both hated and loved it, he hated it when Joshua spoke in English to others partly because he couldn’t understand the conversation and always ended up feeling left out and partly because he knew that Joshua sounded insanely attractive whenever he spoke in English and Jeonghan knew he wasn’t the only one who thought so but he also loved it, at least when they were like this, in their bed with Joshua whispering it low and sweet just for him.

His hips move faster and harder, hands on Joshua’s chest for balance. From this position, he can tell that his boyfriend is hard and so he tries to reign himself in, stopping himself from humping Joshua’s leg to completion. He heaves a shaky breath and slowly begins to kiss his way down Joshua’s beautiful body stopping when he reaches his clothed erection, he slowly pulls Joshua’s underwear down until his erection is freed and resting on his flat stomach. 

Joshua’s cock is as perfect as the rest of him, Jeonghan concludes. He licks from base to tip, paying close attention to the circumcised head. Joshua pets his hair gently and Jeonghan closes his eyes as he begins to suck, his hands reaching up blindly for Joshua’s. Joshua’s large hand intertwines with his own, his other hand still petting Jeonghan’s head gently.

“You’re so good honey” Joshua praises moaning softly as Jeonghan sets up a steady pace hollowing his cheeks to accommodate the length in his mouth.

“Baby” Joshua moans loudly in English, the petname causing Jeonghan to moan and his hand flying to palm at his own crotch.

“Baby…stop” Joshua pleads

Jeonghan pulls away a string of saliva still connected from his lips to Joshua’s cock. Joshua quickly pulls off his underwear, tossing it aside somewhere unimportant, and then with that same sense of urgency he pulls Jeonghan up to him, kissing him hotly, manhandling Jeonghan’s pliant body until the elder is laying on his back head resting against the pillow as he is thoroughly kissed. Joshua’s hands reach for Jeonghan’s underwear and without breaking the kiss he hikes Jeonghan’s hips up and yanks his underwear off.

The new positions cause their erections to rub together and they both moan at the contact. Joshua breaks the kiss, taking both of their lengths into his large hands, holding eye contact with Jeonghan as he begins to rub them together. Jeonghan throws his head back, his eyes rolling at the sensation.

“Oh fuck! Shua! Shua!” he cries out.

“Yeah, I know baby!” Joshua moans increasing the speed of his hands and Jeonghan is embarrassingly close to cumming.

“Jisoo-yah st-stop” he whimpers.

Joshua stops immediately. He leans down to check on Jeonghan who has an arm over his eyes, his hips hiked upwards knees knocking together.

“Are you okay Jeonghannie?” Joshua asks sweetly.

Jeonghan removes his arms from his eye and nods feeling overwhelmed, by the pleasure, by Joshua’s love for him. It was intense, he felt vulnerable and didn’t know how to express the love and adoration that he felt for the younger in this moment, so he pulled Joshua down for a kiss. The younger obliges him, not at all annoyed at the sudden change of pace.

They kiss languidly until Jeonghan feels more comfortable. Joshua kisses his chin, his nose, his closed eyelids. In turn, he hugs Joshua tightly running, his hands soothingly down the younger’s spine, caressing his hair gently. He pecks at Joshua’s bulging bicep that lays next to his head. Joshua hovers over him smiling sweetly at him.

“I was close” he finally explains.

“Didn’t you want to cum?”

“Not like that”

Joshua nods in understanding, he presses a chaste kiss to Jeonghan’s lips and turns to the bedside dresser where they kept the lube. Jeonghan waits patiently for the younger, taking in his back profile, the knobs of his spine, the beautiful round ass that he adores, and those long legs that he loves to have wrapped around him. Joshua catches him staring but doesn’t comment or tease like he usually does, this time he blushes a pretty shade of pink and settles lower on the bed so that his vision is in line with Jeonghan’s ass. This time it is Jeonghan who flushes slightly but Joshua just spreads his legs more widely, kissing his knee and the inside of his thigh until Jeonghan completely forgets about his embarrassment.

The first finger that enters him is uncomfortable, Joshua’s fingers are long and thick, and he tries his best to get used to the strange feeling of having something inside him. By the time the second finger is in Jeonghan is panting his hands once again searching for Joshua’s who takes it without hesitation. It’s a lewd contrast, one hand holds Jeonghan’s own gently while the other fingers him with skill and dexterity, but Jeonghan supposes that it’s a testament to his boyfriend’s duality in general. Joshua works at his insides murmuring praises into the unmarked skin of Jeonghan’s thighs.

“Last one honey” he announces before adding the third. Jeonghan whimpers in discomfort, which is quickly overcome when Joshua nudges at his prostate.

“Ah!”

“There?” Joshua, that devil asks as if he didn’t already know Jeonghan’s body inside and out, as if he couldn't tell from the way that Jeonghan moaned brokenly and began to push back against his fingers.

“Yeah” Jeonghan breathes too lost in the pleasure to call Joshua out on being a cocky bastard.

“Are you ready honey?”

Jeonghan nods desperately, dark eyes wide and glossy. Joshua resumes his previous position once again hovering over Jeonghan as he pushes into him, burying his face in Jeonghan’s neck with a moan as he bottoms out. Jeonghan gasps, hugging Joshua’ tightly to his own body as he tries to get used to the burning pain. He hooks his ankles on the small of Joshua’s back, both staying still for a moment.

After a moment Joshua lifts his head from the crook of Jeonghan’s neck to kiss him, and Jeonghan kisses back just as passionately sucking on Joshua’s tongue when he sticks it into his mouth. The younger moans hips bucking slightly. He pulls away after that, staring deeply into Jeonghan’s eyes, a silent request to move, Jeonghan assents by leaning forward and sucking on Joshua’s prominent Adam's- apple, which he adored because it was just so manly and sexy.

“Fuck!” Joshua curses moving his hips in a slow rhythm head thrown to the heavens as Jeonghan sucks at his throat.

Jeonghan only pulls away when he’s sure that there will be another mark added to Joshua’s skin, feeling slightly proud at the way that Joshua just willingly lets Jeonghan mark him as his own. As if sensing the elder’s thoughts Joshua looks down at him, eyes boring into Jeonghan’s own as if he could see right through him.

Joshua holds himself up on his forearm thrusting at a steady pace, their eyes still locked. It feels so good, every one of Jeonghan’s moans is matched by Joshua’s own. He kisses the crook of Joshua’s arm because it’s the only thing that he can reach, the younger bends down lower until they’re once again locked into their previous embrace, moaning into each other’s mouth.

“Fuck! You feel so good …I’m going crazy” Joshua groans.

Normally Jeonghan would make a smartass remark, but Joshua is fucking him dumb. He moans in response.

“Oh God! There! There! Please” he all but sobs when Joshua jabs his prostate.

Joshua grips his sweaty leg and angles his thrust just right and Jeonghan loses it, voice cracking as he cries out.

“Y-yes!Yes! Yes!” he chants.

Unfortunately, his hold on Jeonghan’s leg slips, and Joshua pulls out. Jeonghan cries out in distress, but Joshua quickly pacifies him, positioning him to lay on his front, he places a pillow beneath Jeonghan’s hips and pushes back in. In this position, Jeonghan feels as if Joshua's presence is completely engulfing him, he’s on top of him, inside him, all around him. Joshua is everywhere and Jeonghan loves it. He buries his face into the pillow and moans as Joshua begins to thrust harder than before.

Contrary to the harsh movement of his hips, Joshua lays gentle kisses all over Jeonghan’s back, the nape of his neck, and his shoulder, both hands intertwining with Jeonghan’s as he grinds into the other, the pillow raising Jeonghan’s hips just enough to create the perfect angle for Joshua’ to hit his prostate. He unburied his head from the sanctuary of his pillow and turned it toward Joshua begging for a kiss amidst the onslaught of pleasure. Joshua kisses him, gently still thrusting into him.

When they break apart Jeeonghan lays his head on his arms, sniffling slightly. Overwhelmed at how good he feels, how safe and loved and adored Joshua makes him feel. His eyes were wet with unshed tears, his abdomen clenching in preparation for his release. Joshua stops thrusting, and Jeonghan whines.

“What’s wrong honey is it too much?”

“I’m gonna cum!” Jeonghan sniffles

Joshua pulls out and Jeonghan lets out a whine but Joshua hushes him lying on his back, he positions Jeonghan over him straddling his stomach, and begins to jerk at Jeonghan’s weeping erection, which had been neglected safe for the way it had been rubbing against the pillow.

“Cum on me” Joshua says

Jeonghan nods frantically, his hand replacing Joshua’s. Joshua looks up at him as if to say ‘I’m all yours’. At that Jeonghan begins to move his hand faster, eyes roving at the mess he made of Joshua, the numerous hickies on his neck, the bite mark on his shoulder, and his red lip swollen from kissing. It doesn’t take much to push him over the edge.

“Jisoo! I’m cumming! I’m-“

He doesn't get to finish his statement before he breaks off into a sob, cum splashing onto Joshua’s chest, sliding down his pecs. He shudders in pleasure, the aftershocks causing him to shake.

“That’s it honey… good job” Joshua chuckles looking at the mess Jeonghan made on his chest with an odd look of pride that flusters the elder.

Jeonghan slumps down in exhaustion, almost landing in his release. Joshua holds him steady kissing his forehead gently, helping him to come down from his high. Jeonghan kisses his cheek in response too tired to move but still wanting to reciprocate Joshua’s display of affection.

“You too “he whispers voice raw from how much he has been moaning.

Joshua looks him right in the eye then, his large fingers swiping through the pool of cum on his chest. He stares at Jeonghan with a lazy satisfied smirk and begins to jerk himself off…using Jeonghan’s cum as lubricant! If he hadn’t almost ascended to heaven with his last orgasm, Jeonghan would have gotten hard again.

He slinks down Joshua’s body and tries to look pretty for him. Bats his eyelashes because he knows that Joshua loves his eyes, thinks that they’re sultry and beautiful especially when he’s staring up at Joshua whilst also being so close to his dick.

“Fuck! I’m so close!” Joshua whines hands moving faster and faster. The final nail in the coffin is when Jeonghan sticks out his tongue awaiting Joshua’s release.

“Oh!” Joshua moans high pitched and strained as he begins to cum. His cum painting Jeonghan’s pink tongue.

The elder makes a show of swallowing it all and then leans down to lick Joshua’s head clean. Joshua flinches at the overstimulation but endures it, holding his arms out for the other to come cuddle. Jeonghan does so easily. They’re both sweaty and gross and Joshua is still covered in cum, but Jeonghan swears that he’s never felt more comfortable.

“Ugh! We need another shower” Joshua groans after catching his breath.

“M’ tired” Jeonghan whines

“What else is new?” Joshua snorts

“You asking me to cum on you” Jeonghan quips

Joshua blushes slightly before rolling his eyes.

“Oh please you loved it” Joshua mutters

Jeonghan cuddles closer to him, feeling extremely sleepy he kisses Joshua’s temple and yawns.

“I did, liked marking you as mine“he shrugs

“Yeah well…I like being yours”

The last part he mumbled but Jeonghan heard it nonetheless, with his eyes still closed he smiled to himself. Feeling perfectly content to bask in the afterglow, he ignores the younger’s scrutinizing gaze and pretends to be asleep, which doesn’t fool Joshua one bit.

“Yoon Jeonghan are you asleep?” Joshua asks suspiciously prodding at Jeonghan’s cheek.

Jeonghan lets out a loud snore.

“Faker!” Joshua chastises slapping Jeonghan’s chest lightly. Jeonghan laughs loudly feeling much lighter than he had for a while albeit extremely tired.

“I’m tired Joshujiiiii” he whines.

“Fine we can have a nap but after we wake up you and I have to shower.”

Jeonghan cuddles closer to Joshua intertwining the bare legs, running his foot up Joshua’s calf. His pretty hand traced patterns on Joshua’s chest, close to where he had painted the other with his cum.

“Do we get to shower together?” he asks innocently.

“Nope”

“Please…” Jeonghan pouts giving Joshua the face- the one where his eyes get all wide and his lips pout irresistibly.

Joshua sighs as if it’s the most tiresome thing in the world but Jeonghan can see him smiling, a pretty quirk of his lips that means he’s amused. He walks away from the bed for a moment well aware that Jeonghan is shamelessly ogling his bare ass and he comes back with his discarded t-shirt that he wipes himself with. Jeonghan closes his eyes as Joshua gently begins to clean him, his eyes threatening to close at any second.

“Can we Joshuji?” he asks sleepily.

“You really are insufferable” Joshua sighs but gets in bed nonetheless his actions contradicting his words as he lets Jeonghan be the little spoon.

“Sorry, you’re stuck with me” Jeonghan mumbles

“Lucky me” Joshua says kissing Jeonghan’s sweaty hair, arms wrapped protectively around the elder’s body.

‘I’m the lucky one’ he thinks to himself before he falls into a sweet, sated slumber.

‘

\