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At seventeen, Clarke has never left Earth. Not even once. Not for a minute. Plenty of her friends have gone, for vacations or a quick jaunt to the moon, but her mother--
She swallows, hard. Her mother had thought it was too dangerous, after her father's accident. She knew, even when it happened, that it was irrational, her mother's fear. His death had been a tragedy, a terrible mistake. People go to space all the time without incident. What had happened to Jake Griffin wasn't indicative of anything but bad luck.
Still, she can't help a swoop of nerves when she looks up at the ship.
"It won't bite."
She glances back to see a boy--young man, really--a few inches taller than she is, with curly dark hair and tan skin. He's smiling in a way that seems more teasing than sympathetic.
"Of course not," she says, apprehension making her voice too sharp. "It doesn't have a mouth."
That only seems to amuse him further. "First time going into space?"
She deflates a little. "I know, it's perfectly safe and I'm being irrational."
"It is irrational," he grants. "Perfectly safe, well. That's debatable."
"I thought you were trying to make me feel better."
"What made you think that?" She glares at him, and he grins. "Honestly, I need to pack your things, assuming you're looking at my ship because you're Clarke Griffin, and I'm taking you to Mars. If you're just admiring it, well, I can't blame you. It is a great ship."
"Your ship?" she asks, frowning. "I'm supposed to be on the Halcyon, with Captain Kane, is this--"
"Okay," he grants, inclining his head. "It's only my ship in the sense that I work on the ship. But you're right, Kane is the captain. So, are you going to let me take your stuff, or are you bailing out?"
"I'm going. I don't have much of a choice," she says, picking up one of her bags. "Where should I put them?"
"In the hold." He easily shoulders one of her bags and grabs the other. "Come on, this way."
"So, if you're not Captain Kane, who are you?"
"Bellamy Blake. Third officer, I guess."
"You guess?"
"We're pretty loose with titles here. But I've been here for a while, and Kane likes me, so yeah. Let's go with third officer." He glances at her over his shoulder. "Where are you going in Mars?"
"Ark Colony."
"Really?"
"Why not?"
"Just a surprise. That's where I'm from."
That is a surprise. It's not unheard of, but colonization is fairly recent, and Bellamy can't be that much older than she is. And the colonies don't have many children now, let alone twenty years ago. "You were born there?"
"Close enough, yeah. I was four." He considers her for a second and then shrugs his shoulders. "I was born in Virginia, but my mom got pregnant." Clarke winces, and he shrugs. Second pregnancies can happen, but they're rare, and usually terminated quickly. "The timing actually worked pretty well; they'd just changed the one-child law so you could go to the Mars colonies instead of terminating, so that's what she did. It's still a fucking shitty law, but it turned out all right for us. The first few years were rough, but my sister's settled in now, and--that's worth a lot."
"Is she still in Ark?"
"Yup."
"What's her name?"
"Why, you're going to look her up?"
"I don't really know many people there." It's not like there are many people there to know, from what she's heard, but--any lead would be nice. She doesn't want to just be shut up with Wells for the rest of her life.
"Then why the fuck are you going to Ark?"
"My best friend went out there a couple years ago. And he's about the only family I have left, so--he invited me to stay."
Bellamy pushes a button to open up the hold and puts her bags in, holding his hand out for the one she's carrying too. "Who's your best friend?"
"Wells? Jaha. His dad is the mayor."
Although he tries to hide it, Clarke sees the flash of dislike on his face. It rankles until he says, "Mayor Jaha, huh?" and then she smiles.
"I hear he's not making himself very popular. Which doesn't surprise me, from what I remember of him."
Bellamy gives her another look, sizing her up again, and then he closes the hold. "So, you've never left Earth before, and now you're packing up your whole life and moving to Mars? You know we aren't going to be back through for a month, right? You're going to be stuck there."
"Because you're the only ship that ever goes Earth-to-Mars," she says, rolling her eyes. "Look, I know Mars is--"
"You don't," he says. "You've got three bags. How much of that stuff can you need? You haven't got a clue what it's like out there. If you just want to get off Earth, go to one of the cities. They've got plenty of stuff to keep you busy until you get tired of it."
"It's everything I own." She swallows hard, finding a lump in her throat, where she was expecting anger. "I don't have anywhere else to go, all right? I'm going to stay with my best friend and I'm bringing all my stuff because I don't have anywhere else to put it. So just tell me where I'm staying and leave me alone."
There's a pause, and she's almost expecting an apology, but he doesn't offer one. Instead, he simply says, "Come on, it's this way. We don't take many passengers, so don't expect anything fancy. Or a lot of company."
"Just you?"
He gives her a smirk, but she thinks she senses something a little conciliatory in it. "Yeah, I know, it's pretty bad. If it helps, I'll be working a lot."
"I have books and stuff," she says. "And charcoal."
"Yeah, I have to warn against you starting fires on the ship. I know this is your first time in space, but just because we're made of metal--"
Clarke jabs her elbow at him, hard. "It's for drawing."
He dodges, grinning, and Clarke finds herself smiling back. He's an ass, but at least he's honest about it. "I guess that probably won't threaten the safety of the voyage." He pushes the button for a door and gestures Clarke through. "Your bunk. Private, relatively clean, home for the next two weeks."
"You make it sound so glamorous."
"Again, if you want glamour, don't go to to the fucking Martian colonies. There is nowhere less glamorous. I'll unload your stuff and you can go back--" He falters, and Clarke knows he was going to say home. "Stay on Earth," he corrects.
"How long before take off?"
"Long enough for you to change your mind."
She puts her bag down, decisive. "I wanted you to tell me about Mars."
He considers. "I've got things to do. But you can find me later. Or you can come with me while I do system checks. Your call."
"You don't mind?"
"It's going to be boring as shit for me, I do this all the time. So yeah, if you want to follow me around and hear about Mars, that's fine. I'll talk your ear off. I have a lot of opinions on Mars."
"Can I learn about the ship too?" He raises his eyebrows, and she shrugs. "I'll run out of books eventually, right?"
"Depends on how many you've got. You're not gonna be able to download more on the trip. And web connectivity on Mars is pretty spotty."
"So I might as well do something interesting while I've got the chance, right?"
He gives her half a smile. "Whatever you say. Come on."
*
The trip from Earth to Mars is just about two weeks, and the first few days are the worst. Bellamy shows her the systems he has to check before they take off, and then he straps her in to leave the atmosphere. She doesn't throw up, but it's a close thing, and she expects it to be better once they're in space, but it makes her anxious, a strange pressure on her chest that doesn't let up.
"That's pretty normal," Bellamy tells her. He seems grudgingly impressed with how well she's doing, which she wasn't expecting. "It turns out space is fucking terrifying."
"Says the astronaut."
He flashes her a grin. "If you get used to it in a couple days, you might have a future up here. Otherwise, you should stay on the ground like my sister."
"That's why she's still on Mars?"
"Yeah." He sighs. "Hand me the wrench?" Clarke finds it and hands it over, waiting for him to continue. "So, I told you how we got to Mars, right?"
"Yeah."
"So that was the early days of terraforming. If you don't like space, you're going to hate Mars, by the way. It still feels like you're only one tiny crack from dying in agony."
"You make your entire life sound so appealing."
"Hey, I never said you should want my life," he says. "I doubt it's your thing. But it works for me, so." Apparently done with the repairs, he closes up the access panel. "Anyway, it was the early days of terraforming, so it was--weird. The ground coverage was spotty, dust everywhere, and it was just--it didn't feel like a real place, the first few years. It was hard just to survive, to feel normal. And it's gotten better, but it's still--" He looks at her. "Where did you live? On Earth?"
"California."
He nods. "So--it's amazing how different it looks. There's stuff you think you know, like the fucking sky. My mom never got used to looking out the window and not seeing blue skies and green mountains. It's another world. It's all Octavia's ever known, so it never bothered her. And I've been there long enough it feels like home to me. But I think it killed our mom."
"I'm sorry."
He shrugs. "It was a long time ago. I was old enough to get a job with Kane to support O. She was going to come with me when she was ready, but--yeah, she hates space. So I'm here and she lives with my mom's friend Indra. I still send money back, but--honestly, she's old enough to pretty much take care of herself now."
"How old is that?"
"About your age. Sixteen."
"I'm seventeen."
"A year counts as about your age. Come on, if you're coming. I have more shit to do."
She'd worried, the first day, about following him around. But he's a lot younger than Kane and Sinclair, and the other crewmember around his age, Jackson, is usually in the cockpit, so she thinks he's probably kind of grateful for her company. And she sort of likes him. He's overly blunt and thinks he's right all the time, but he's more amused than offended when she argues with him, and he's smart and interesting and honest.
"When did your mother die?"
"I was fourteen, O was nine."
"That's about how old I was when my dad died."
"Which? Fourteen or nine?"
"Thirteen."
He nods. "And your mom just died?"
The lump's in her throat again, but she swallows past it. She hasn't had to say it yet; she figured Bellamy knew, either because Kane told him or just because it's obvious, and everyone at home, for the funeral, well--word spread quickly without her help. "Two weeks ago."
He puts his hand on her shoulder, large and warm and firm. "I'm sorry too."
"It's fine. Just keep showing me how to fix the ship until I feel better."
"If you're anything like me, it'll be longer than the two weeks it took us to get here," he says, but he's teasing, and it's nice. Captain Kane was friends with her parents, keeps trying to have earnest conversations about what a great person her mother was, but Bellamy's gentle ribbing is a lot more helpful.
"I assume there's a lot to keep me busy on Mars."
"You're not wrong," he says. "Want to learn about the engine?"
"Lead the way."
*
Bellamy's right about space. Clarke gets used to it after a few days, and she even kind of likes it. She has things to do to keep occupied, and Bellamy's dealt enough with grief to know it'll help if she's too exhausted by the time she goes to bed to think about anything, so he gives her actual jobs, the kind of physical labor she's never done before.
"You're going to have to do this all the time in the colonies," he tells her. "Get used to it."
She's surprised to find she isn't actually looking forward to reaching Mars. She loves Wells, but he left three years ago, and they haven't seen each other since, except in occasional vid chats. They write frequently and they're still close, but--she doesn't really know what it will be like, living with him on Mars. The ship is contained and safe, and she feels like she knows where she fits in, but that's irrational. The truth is, she doesn't fit in here. Bellamy's just nice enough to let her pretend for a while.
They're landing at Port Atlas, a hub which serves a few of the colonies. Mars is speckled with patches of green, the terraformed colonies spread over its surface like moss, and Clarke has never seen anything like it.
"Home sweet home," says Bellamy, as they watch the approaching planet through the viewport. There's a strange catch in his voice, and Clarke wonders if he really does miss it, or if he's happy up here, doing maintenance for cargo runs. "Come on, we've got to strap in for atmosphere."
When they land, Bellamy gets her stuff and asks if she knows how to get to Ark; before she can respond, she hears someone say, "Clarke!" and Wells is lifting her up and twirling her around. "You made it!"
"You thought I wouldn't?"
"Thought you might change your mind. Is this all your stuff?"
"Yeah." She looks around and frowns when Bellamy's gone.
"What?" asks Wells.
"Do you see Bellamy?"
"Blake?"
"Yeah. He was--he was helping me. I wanted to thank him." The thought of not getting to say goodbye to him makes panic rise in her throat. She has to say goodbye. She doesn't think she would have gotten through the last few weeks without him.
"Don't worry. Kane's mom is in Vista Colony, so he always takes a day or two to visit her. Bellamy'll be back in Ark, you can thank him there. His sister's a local."
Clarke can't help noting that Wells calls Octavia a local, but not Bellamy. She also can't help looking around for him one more time, but it's surprisingly crowded. There aren't a lot of actual interplanetary ships that come through, but the spaceport also serves as a hub for local trams, and Bellamy has managed to slip off into the throng. It sends a pang of hurt through her, but--he probably won't get long with his sister. He probably wants to see her more than he wants to hang out with Clarke.
"Cool," she says. "Where are we going?"
She and Wells gather up her stuff between them and make their way to the tram that will take them to the colony. Wells is as she remembered him, friendly and open, still her best friend, but they aren't even to the tram before he asks, "How are you holding up?"
"Fine," she says, too short, tension racketing through her body.
He looks at her, because--it's a lie, it's such an obvious lie, but he doesn't call her out. Instead he nods. "And you didn't hate the flight too much? Not everyone does well with space travel."
"The first few days were tough, but I got used to it. Bellamy made sure I had a lot to keep me busy." That gets her a dubious look, and she shoves him. "He was showing me how to repair the ship, what were you thinking?"
"Nothing!" Wells protests. "Just that Bellamy isn't exactly known for being friendly. I'm surprised he was helping you out."
"He wasn't objecting when I followed him around. I wouldn't say he was exactly outgoing. And he was being a total dick until I snapped at him. But--yeah, he helped."
It helps even more when they get to the tram to Ark and Bellamy's there, looking around in that way people do when they want to find something, but don't want to be too obvious about it. Clarke grins when his eyes get to her, and he smiles back, gives her a small nod.
"Huh," says Wells. "That is friendly."
Clarke doesn't respond, just goes over to him and the brunette next to him, who must be his sister. There aren't many people going out to Ark, just the four of them and a few older men and women who don't look very social, which makes sense from what Wells and Bellamy told her. Ark is a newer colony, still young and rough. The richer immigrants tend to go to the few cities scattered across the surface, where there's very little interaction with the actual terraformed planet. There are decent tax breaks for living on Mars, since most people don't want to, and if you're in the city, it's not that different from being on Earth.
Aside from the skyline, if Bellamy is to be believed.
"God, you have so much shit," he grumbles. "Give me a couple of those. This is my sister. O, this is Clarke, she's moving in."
"With the mayor?" Octavia asks, sounding wary. She's beautiful, long brown hair and bright eyes, lighter skin than her brother's and fewer freckles, with the same distrust lurking in her eyes that used to be in Bellamy's. Even if she hadn't known before that he had a sister, she thinks she would have realized basically instantly that they were related.
"You two grew up together, right?" Bellamy asks, in a pointed way.
"Yeah." Clarke leans against Wells, small, warm affection. "Did I thank you for inviting me out here?"
Wells puts his arm around her and squeezes. "Don't have to. You know I'm always here for you."
"I know." She offers Octavia a smile. "It's nice to meet you. Your brother basically never shuts up about you, so I feel like I kind of know awkwardly too much."
As she hoped, it gets a smile out of Octavia, and Bellamy's scowl is clearly fighting with a smile.
"You were the one who kept following me around," he says. "I tried to get rid of you."
"How long will you be here, Clarke?" Octavia asks, giving Clarke another calculating look.
"Indefinitely," she says.
"As long as she needs," Wells adds.
"I think you might be able to to get a job with Raven," Bellamy says, as the tram comes in. He takes her bag before she can, and she glares at him. He ignores her.
Octavia is gaping. "Raven? Seriously?"
"She was helping me out on the flight," he says. "Quick learner. And I feel like you'll want something to do," he adds to Clarke. "You don't seem like the type who likes do nothing."
"No," Clarke admits. "Who's Raven?"
"The resident mechanic," Wells says.
Bellamy adds, "She taught me everything I know. And she's way better than I am."
"Doesn't like space?" Clarke asks.
Bellamy and Octavia exchange a look. "She used to come with us on runs sometimes, but she hurt her leg a year back," says Bellamy. "Badly enough she's planet-bound for a while. Maybe forever." He pauses. "Probably you just shouldn't mention it."
"Okay." She nods, mostly to herself. "That would be good, getting a job. And the mechanical stuff was interesting."
"Cool." He nods his head toward the window. "Pay attention. We're going out."
The tram has been going underground, but Clarke can see sunlight ahead of them, and Bellamy's right--she wants to see this.
She's seen pictures, of course, but it is amazing, knowing she's really here, on a different planet. She used to dream about her dad taking her here, or to the lunar colonies. It's hard to see it without him, but--it's beautiful too, breathtaking. All dust and domes.
People used to dream of this.
She doesn't realize they're all watching her for a long time, too distracted by the landscape rushing by, and when she does, she flushes. "Sorry. New planet."
"She might do okay," Octavia says, almost grudging.
Bellamy's smile is fond, and it makes Clarke's chest twist. "She'll be fine."
*
Clarke and Thelonius Jaha have never really been close, not like Clarke and Wells are. Thelonius was the adult, intimidating and surprisingly awkward around children, given he had one of his own. His wife had died giving birth to Wells, and Clarke wonders now if he'd just assumed before that happened that he would never have to interact with his son until he was older. He clearly loves Wells, he always has, but he and Clarke were oddly formal and uncomfortable with each other, the last time she saw him.
So it's a surprise to find Thelonius actually waiting for the tram station, like he's excited to see her.
"Wow," says Octavia. "It's the mayor, Bell."
Bellamy's jaw works, like he's trying not to lose his temper. "I know it's the mayor. I guess this is our cue to take off."
Clarke wants to protest, but even if Thelonius wasn't here, this is where they part ways. Their journey is over, and they're going back to different homes.
"Thank you for everything," she bursts out, catching his sleeve, in case he tries to leave before she finishes. "I don't know what I would have--"
He smiles down at her, all warmth. "You would have been fine. And I'll be here tomorrow too. You don't need to give me your goodbye speech yet."
"I was trying to be nice," she says, unable to keep a smile off her own face. "But never mind, I learned my lesson, fuck off."
"Stop by my place tomorrow," he says. "I'll introduce you to Raven." He lingers for a minute, like there's something else he wants to add, but Octavia tugs his arm, so he just gives her another smile. "See you later, Clarke. Wells," he adds, after a second of delay.
"Later," Clarke echoes, fingers twitching with the desire to do something stupid, like cling to him. But even if he wasn't leaving, he's not her security blanket.
He lingers for a minute too, but then he's gone, taking the other exit, away from Thelonius.
"Your dad really isn't popular, huh?" she asks Wells, low.
"You know Dad. Always making friends and influencing people."
Clarke's understanding of Mars politics is shaky at best. She kept up a little, for Wells' sake, but it was hard when it was pure curiosity. And she'd had trouble picturing it, if she's honest. Colony mayors tend to be unpopular because they're Earth officials who make their money from taxes and bureaucracy instead of hard work, and Clarke is admittedly not that familiar with making money from labor. Her family's money comes from her grandfather, who got it from his grandfather, and so on down the line. They've been rich for so long they don't know anything else, and they've always been able to live lives of relative leisure, doing only the work they want to do.
It wasn't a surprise, hearing Bellamy thought she wouldn't make it on Mars. She's never had to work to make it anywhere.
"Clarke," says Thelonius, sounding genuinely glad to see her. "It's been too long. I'm so sorry for your loss. Your mother was a remarkable woman."
"Thank you, Thelonius. And thank you for letting me come out and stay."
"Of course. For as long as you need. I hope the ride out wasn't too difficult for you."
She resists the automatic urge to look around for Bellamy; the Ark Colony station is small, and she could probably find him in the crowd, but--if he'd wanted Thelonius to pay attention to him, he would have just stayed with her and Wells.
"No, it was fine. An easy passage, according to Captain Kane."
"I'm glad to hear it. And it wasn't too difficult, being in space for so long? I never can stand it."
"It took me a few days to get used to it, but it didn't bother me."
"You always were your father's daughter," he says, and it's warm and fond, but it makes her feel sick all the same.
"I always was," she agrees, keeping her voice light.
It's natural to look back before she steps out, to take in the station, small and simple. It's amazing how it feels older than anything on Earth, even though there's nothing on Mars even half as old as anything in her hometown. She likes it--it would be disappointing, she decides, to come to a new world and have it feel just like the old one.
Bellamy catches her eye, looking back himself from the other end of the station. He waves his hand with a small smile, and Clarke smiles back, feeling herself relax by degrees.
She can do this.
Outside is disconcerting, a mismatch of familiar fauna, trees and grass and even a few spotty flowers, actual landscaping, and alien terrain, the ruddiness of the dirt paths and mountains in the distance, the unfamiliar sky. The buildings are the same, strangely enough; the older buildings are mostly metal and glass, like they are in the city she came from, while the new ones, built after the colonization, use unfamiliar native stones. The style is different too, something unique to the colony, and Clarke wants to see it all, to learn everything. It's a new planet. She doesn't know how not to be excited about that.
"You love this, don't you," Wells teases.
"You don't?"
"It's got its perks," he says, with a shrug of one shoulder. "There's a lot of interesting stuff. I'd love to learn more about the culture, but you're doing better with than in two weeks than I have in years."
"What does that mean?" she asks, frowning.
He lets his father get ahead of them a little, out of easy earshot, and lowers his voice. "You got in with Bellamy Blake. None of them trust me, I'm the mayor's son. I'm separate. But if he vouches for you, maybe you can get me in."
"Get you in?"
"They think I'm temporary," he says. "That as soon as I'm eighteen, I'll leave and go back to Earth for school or go to one of the cities for easier work."
"But you don't think you will?" Clarke had thought of going directly to college herself, but she didn't feel ready, didn't know what she'd study or how she'd feel. She needed something else, something that felt real, and Wells and another planet was the best she could come up with.
"Not right away," he says. "I wouldn't mind studying something, but--I like it here. I want to come back and help. And not how my father wants to help."
"How does he want to help?" Clarke asks. It's hard not to notice the way the scattered colonists react to Thelonius, a wariness that's palpable. Worse, he seems to enjoy it, standing straight and proud, as if he thinks he should be treated like this. As if he likes not being a part of the community.
"He sees Mars as a means to an end," Wells says, careful. "Something that exists for Earth's benefit. I don't, but they all assume I do. And none of them will give me the time of day." He grins. "I'm not as pretty as you, I guess."
Clarke scowls a little, reflexive. Bellamy hadn't given much indication he thought she was pretty, not that she cares. He's an ally, not a suitor. "He feels bad for me because my mother's dead. I'm sorry yours died too soon for you to use it for leverage."
Wells winces, but Clarke doesn't have the vindictive flare of triumph she was hoping she would. She just feels tired, because now he'll feel weird about it again, and that will just make it worse. He was trying to cheer her up, and she lashed out, just because she's tired and sad and irritated Bellamy will be gone in a few days.
"I didn't mean--" Wells starts, and Clarke smiles.
"I know. Sorry, I'm just--it's been a long few weeks. I need some sleep. I'll try to stop snapping at you."
"It's okay. I guess I--" He looks down, clearly embarrassed. "I wasn't expecting someone else to have already been cheering you up. I thought it'd be on me. But I'm glad you weren't just miserable the whole trip. Even if I am jealous you're fitting in better than I am."
It makes sense, and Clarke feels a surge of fondness for Wells. Of course he wanted to save her; he's her best friend, he always wants to be the one who'll help.
"I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't invited me to come out," she says, honestly. "And my only friend other than you is leaving in the next few days, so we'll both be outcasts in no time. I didn't get the impression Octavia liked me much."
"He'll talk her around. Those two always end up on the same side, eventually."
"So maybe she'll talk him out of it."
Wells snorts. "Yeah, I don't think so." He straightens and gestures next to him. "That's the town hall, by the way. It's all pretty old-fashioned right now. Ark Colony isn't much of a producer yet--we're supposed to be on lumber, but that takes time to build up, so we're pretty self-sufficient, unlike something like Vista Colony, which does mining, or the agriculture colonies. We've been taking care of ourselves long enough that once we're supposed to turn into a supply colony, it's going to be bad. And that's getting closer."
"Your father isn't worried?"
"That's what Mars is for," he says, the roll of his eyes showing exactly what he thinks of that attitude. "One giant resource to be mined. But for people here, it's home, and they aren't getting fair compensation for their labor because it's for the good of humanity."
"But this stuff isn't going to Earth for the most part, right? The food doesn't, and the lumber won't. Bellamy said they mostly carried minerals off world and brought luxury items in for the cities."
"Yeah. But you know how it is in the cities. Most everyone on Mars is here because they got bribed, but people living in the city--and people like my father--were already rich and got richer. The colonists came out because they couldn't find work on Earth, and now they're finding that out here, they're expected to take less money for their work just because it's for the greater good."
Clarke bites back on a smile. Wells always had the strongest morals of anyone she's ever known; of course he'd be upset.
She glances at Thelonius to make sure he's not listening, but he seems to be giving them privacy to catch up, and the colonists are still avoiding them as well. With their voices low, heads bent together, they're very private. So she leans in against him, fond.
"All these revolutionary thoughts and the revolutionaries won't take you?"
"I've been trying."
"If it makes you feel better, Bellamy obviously liked you more than he liked your father. They probably just don't know what to do with you."
"You're the only one who's ever known what to do with me."
It's probably true, Clarke thinks; as kids, she and Wells tended to keep to themselves, a club of two, and if she had trouble making new friends after he left, it was clearly so much worse for him, alone in a colony which refused to trust him because of his father.
"I'll teach them," she says, linking her arm in his and letting him show her to her new home.
*
It's not hard to appreciate the problems the colonists have with the government, looking at the mayor's house. It's much larger than any of the other dwellings Wells pointed out, and plenty of those were for families of larger than two. Wells might not have friends, but he does have plenty of time to do research, so he gives her a general breakdown of the various incentives used to bring people to Mars. For the wealthy politicians, like Jaha, the appeal is in something like charity, and, of course, a healthy amount of money that he doesn't even need. Those who live in the cities pay for the privilege, but in return get more space and better, cheaper produce than they do on Earth, as well as significant tax breaks. And in return, the government eases some of the overpopulation crisis on the homeworld.
For the poor, the benefits are fewer because they don't have as many choices to begin with. Clarke is entitled to the same stipend for staying off Earth as the other colony-dwellers get, as well as her own plot of land, should she want it. Neither is valuable enough to her that she's in a rush to claim them, but for someone who didn't have a home of their own on Earth, the offer would appealing, if for no other reason than they had very few other options. And once they come, the life isn't better so much as different, hard in other ways than poverty on Earth is.
Despite Bellamy's explanation of how he came to the colony, it's still a shock when Wells says, "Some people come for the two-child law too."
"Planetwide?" she asks. She had no idea those laws were relaxed anywhere.
"You can petition for three, even," he says. "There's a lot of space, and the more people live here, the more taxes they can collect for further terraforming. And if Mars is a success, they'll be able to push through the Europa colonies too."
It seems impossible that anyone fits five people into one of the little houses Wells shows Clarke, and it only makes the size of the mayor's house seem more unnecessary.
"They have to know this can't last," she remarks, looking around the room Wells gives her, one they weren't even using. "Obvious inequalities like this, on such a small scale--do they think it's been too long since we had regular riots in our lives?"
"I have no idea," he says. "Every time I try to bring it up to my dad, he says they know they're better off here than they would be back home."
"Yeah, that sounds like a good argument."
"I did warn you it might not be what you were looking for, out here."
Clarke flops down on her back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. "Is it weird that I think it is? What I'm looking for. I like it--well, not here, I don't know about here yet. But I like being--somewhere else. It's helping."
"Good. I'm glad. I was a little worried you'd show up, take one look around, and hitch a ride right back to Earth."
"Nope," Clarke says. "I've got to make sure you make at least one other friend before I go, right?"
"Then you're never leaving," he teases, and she smiles.
"Maybe I never will."
*
Clarke offers to take Wells with her to see Bellamy the next day, but he claims he has things to do. Instead, he gives her directions and leaves her to go on her own, which makes her nervous. She doesn't like the feeling of walking alone through the town; it's clear that word of her has spread, and every pair of eyes seems to be assessing her, trying to decide if she belongs to the mayor's house, or elsewhere.
The Blake house is much like the other houses, small and neat, made of muted red brick. It's so like the others that Clarke might not have recognized it, if not for seeing Bellamy outside, doing some work in the garden.
It's springtime in Ark Colony, edging toward summer, warmer than home was when Clarke left. Bellamy's thrown his shirt aside and it's a lot to take in, so Clarke ignores it to crouch next to him instead.
"What are you doing?"
He startles at the sound of her voice and shoots her a wry smile. "Jesus, you scared the shit out of me. Warn a guy."
"Sorry," she says, with no remorse, and he snorts.
"Yeah, I can tell." He pushes his sweaty curls off his forehead with his arm, and Clarke continues to not stare at him with effort. He's very muscular. "I wasn't expecting you until later."
"I didn't have much else to do."
"I guess not," he grants. "Well, I'm taking care of my weeding while I'm around. O mostly doesn't live here and I don't get a lot of chances to interact with dirt on the ship. I'll do Raven's next. After that, I'm all yours."
"I can't help?" she huffs.
"You want to?" He shakes his head before she can respond. "Of course you do. You mind getting your clothes dirty?"
"Nope."
He nods. "Okay, cool. Come over here."
The work is tiring, but Clarke likes it. Bellamy explains that most of the colonists keep their own small gardens, growing vegetables and some fruits, and some even have a few animals. It feels more like the past than the future to her, and Bellamy laughs when she tells him as much.
"The more things change, the more they stay the same. We may be in space, but we're still colonists."
"You're not," she points out.
"I don't fit in anywhere," he says, but it's with good humor.
"I'm not sure I do either."
"You'll be fine." He yanks up a stubborn weed. "I mean, look at this. Every plant we have on Mars we brought here, on purpose. We were supposed to have nothing but useful fauna that did what we wanted it to. And unwanted seeds still go everywhere."
"Are you saying I'm an unwanted seed?" she ask, dubious.
He grins. "Nah. Just that you're looking for the right place to take root. How's your friend Wells?"
"Lonely. Apparently you guys don't like him."
"Hey, don't blame me," Bellamy protests, picking up his shirt and using it to dry off his forehead. "I don't live here. I never make friends with anyone." He considers the shirt and then tugs it back on, despite the wet patches.
"What were you expecting?" Clarke teases, when he pokes a damp spot on his chest.
"I was hoping it would be on the back." He offers her a hand up and pulls her to her feet when she takes it. "So, coming to Raven's?"
"You wanted to introduce me, right?"
"If you want to keep doing mechanical stuff, yeah. If not--actually, you guys would still get along. So yeah, come on."
"I like how you talked yourself out of giving me a choice."
"Yeah, you have to accept my help," he says, grinning over his shoulder. "I want to make sure you're covered before I leave."
"When is that?"
"Tomorrow morning."
"Not much of a break."
"I have plenty of downtime on the ship." He pauses and adds, "I'll give you my email, so you can let me know if you need anything. Or just, you know. Want to talk."
"That would be nice," she says. "Thanks."
"Wells give you the tour?"
"Not really. Just pointed out some highlights. Town hall, general store, post office."
He nods. "Most people work on their own property in the morning, and then anyone who actually works in the woods goes out."
"What kind of work is there out there? The trees aren't big enough to harvest yet, right?"
"It's mostly ecosystem stuff. Ark is the test colony for developing actual realistic wilderness on Mars, so we've got wild animals out there, with tagging and tracking. Some of the endangered populations from North America. Seeing if it's really viable to bring non-humans out."
"You've got livestock, right?"
"Yeah, but--they're more contained. The forest area isn't entirely terraformed, so there's--" He waves his hand. "I don't know. Concerns. You should ask Monty about it if you're curious, he's the head scientist. And a really cool guy. I'm not an expert." He points to a small cluster of houses. "That's their area."
"You know a lot for a guy who hasn't actually lived here in a while."
"It's still home," he says, sounding a little defensive.
"It's nice. Like I said, Wells doesn't know many people. He thinks me having an in with you will help."
"Who says you've got an in?"
"Your sister seemed to think I did."
"Yeah, okay." He smiles. "She thought you were cool too, so--you should be fine. I can't speak for the mayor's son, though."
"He can speak for himself," Clarke says, with a smile. "Believe me, he has a lot of opinions. Better ones than I have."
"Huh. Well, I'm just going to introduce you to Raven, and it's up to you from there. I'll be gone."
"Just for a month, though."
His smile is wry and a little--sad, she thinks. Or wistful. It's not an expression she's seen on him before, and she can't quite figure it out. "I'm gone a lot more than I'm here, Clarke. I'm not really--" He rubs the back of his neck. "I'll be back in a month, yeah," he agrees at last. "So try to last that long before you run screaming back to Earth."
"Yeah, because you saw exactly how much I missed Earth in the last two weeks," she teases. "If I wanted to leave, I'd just go back with you now."
"But you don't?"
"I've been here less than twenty-four hours. And I like it, so far. It's--there is absolutely nothing to remind me of my parents."
He considers her. "What happened to your mom? Not--it just seems like it must be a lot, if you can't even be on the same planet anymore."
"It's nothing like that. Or maybe it is, I'm not sure." She looks down at the ground, smiles at the reddish tint of the path under her feet. Not Earth. "My dad was an engineer, he designed ships and parts. He was always telling me he was going to take me to the Lunar Colonies or to Mars, and then he died on a routine flight, and Mom decided space was just too dangerous, so--I never went. And then she died, on Earth, in a pointless accident, so, yeah. It felt like time."
"Huh," he says. "So, following in your dad's footsteps?"
"Feeling closer to him, at least." She looks up, smiles at the sky. It's mostly blue today, but it still doesn't feel like her sky. "And I always wanted to know what it was like."
"Now you know. See if you can guess which one is Raven's."
Clarke smiles, looking at the uneven row of houses in front of them. "Is it the one surrounded by scrap metal?"
"Good job." He goes up and bangs on the door. "Raven! You better be awake!"
"Fuck, shut up!" she hears from inside, and there's some clattering before the door opens.
Raven is unbelievably gorgeous, long dark ponytail and perfect skin, and she only briefly looks at Bellamy before turning her attention to Clarke, eyeing her with wariness.
"Did you actually make a friend? Where?"
"On the ship, where else do I go? This is Clarke, she's moving in. She likes learning shit."
"Yeah? Well, I don't like teaching shit." She looks back at Clarke. "You're staying with the mayor, right?"
"I'm going to have this conversation a lot, aren't I?" Clarke asks Bellamy. He shrugs, apparently not willing to help her on this one. She is going to handle this on her own, at some point. He'll be gone soon. "Wells is my best friend. My mom died, my dad's been dead for years, so here I am. Bellamy was showing me how to fix stuff on the ship, he said you could keep doing that. I don't have anything else planned."
Raven keeps looking at her, and Clarke doesn't look away. "So, what, your parents are dead so you said fuck it and packed up your life to come to Mars?" she finally asks.
"Basically, yeah."
There's another pause, and Raven says, "Jaha is a dick."
"Wells isn't."
"You could use a hand," Bellamy points out, eyes flicking down to her crutches. They're shoddier than what she'd have on Earth, and Clarke realizes with a sick twist of her stomach that the injury probably wasn't that bad. That if she'd been wealthier, she would have just gotten it fixed.
"Fuck you," Raven says, mildly. "Are you here to do my weeding again? You know your actual house is a disaster, right? You could clean that and leave me alone."
"And miss out on all this affection? No way. Besides, I needed to introduce you to Clarke. She imprinted on me, I feel bad leaving her without any backup. And if she imprinted on me, we know she doesn't mind grumpy assholes who just talk to machines."
Raven snorts. "Okay, whatever, go do whatever it is you're going to do." She looks at Clarke. "I assume you're hungry, I'll give you food."
Raven's house is small and full of more spare parts, but they've been stacked in such a way that she can move easily through the cramped room even with her leg. There's a cat licking itself in a sunbeam, and it's cozier than Clarke would have expected, given how full it is of pointy bits of metal.
"So, you want a job?" Raven asks.
"I want something to do. You don't have to pay me or anything, but--I haven't got a plan yet and I'm going to lose it if I don't have anything to keep me busy."
"Yeah, I guess I get that. And Bellamy's not wrong, I could use another pair of hands." She considers. "You seem to know Jaha isn't that popular around here."
"It was pretty hard to tell, you guys hide it so well."
That gets something that's almost a real laugh. "Yeah, okay. I assume if you liked the guy, Bellamy wouldn't have brought you by."
"We're not enemies," Clarke says, careful. "Not on a personal level. We're not buddies or anything, but I'm living in his house. Politically, though? I don't agree with him." She pauses, but--she trusts Bellamy, and Bellamy trusts Raven, and Wells wants these people to like him. And Wells can take care of himself. "Wells doesn't either. He knows a lot more about it than I do. All my Martian politics I got from papers, Wells, and I guess Bellamy now."
Raven shakes her head. "Bellamy chose a shitty time to start getting crushes," she says. "I'll make breakfast, grab that gravity stabilizer."
Clarke looks around. "There are like five in this room alone. Narrow it down."
That gets her a real smile, bright like the sun. "Okay, he really was teaching you. Thanks goodness. The Griffin."
"My dad designed the Griffin Gravitizers," Clarke says, unable to keep a smug smile off her face. "Bellamy didn't have to teach me that one."
"Your dad was Jake Griffin?"
"Yeah."
Raven nods once. "Okay, fine. You can stay."
*
They spent more time chatting than working; Bellamy wanders in periodically to tell Raven she needs to get rid of a bunch of shit, and Raven tells him he's a bunch of shit.
Clarke isn't jealous. Really.
Of course, when Raven tells her how she ended up here--followed her boyfriend to Mars, took odd jobs on Kane's ship to make money for the two of them, presumed dead after the accident, and found out, after two weeks of recovery on Earth during which they couldn't get in touch with the boyfriend, he'd already moved on--she thinks it's one of the shittier stories she's ever heard. So she could use a nice boyfriend like Bellamy.
After he wanders off to do something unspecified with some sheet metal, Clarke tells her as much, and Raven rolls her eyes. "Yeah, no. We suck at dating. We tried it for, uh, about half an hour after we slept together." She smirks. "That was really subtle though, nice job. He's unattached. Probably because he spends most of his time in space and he's a fucking grumpy asshole. I'm pretty sure no one who wants a nice boyfriend should go for Bellamy. But good luck with that."
"Thanks," Clarke says, trying not to blush. She really did imprint on him. It's embarrassing.
"Come on, we'll go work outside so we can make fun of him," Raven says. She moves awkwardly on the crutches still, and Clarke thinks--once she's a little better with metal, she could make something better for that leg. Her mother was a doctor, and Clarke knows a little about medicine, just from growing up around a hospital. She'd wondered about being a doctor herself, but--she's had enough of watching people die. Saving people is great, but she knows you can't save everyone.
Bellamy pretends he's going to be productive with his project for about ten minutes, and then he flops down on the grass next to Clarke.
"You're not working," he says, somewhat accusatory.
"I'm vetting her," says Raven. "Making sure I want to hire her."
"It's like you don't trust my judgement."
"When are you leaving again? Thank god you're never around for more than a day or two, I'd murder you."
"I miss you too."
It's nice, honestly: an afternoon in the sun, listening to Raven and Bellamy bicker, occasionally interjecting with her own opinions, feeling almost like she fits in. She wishes Wells had come with her, just so he'd start to feel included too. But she can start bringing him.
She can work on this.
"When are you leaving?" Raven asks Bellamy, in a lull.
He squints at Clarke. He's still lying in the sparse grass, his arms crossed behind his head, looking easy and relaxed. Clarke's going to be fine without him, but she'll be sad to see him go. "Tomorrow morning," he says. "First shuttle out, so I assume you're not gonna wake up to say goodbye."
"You're not going to war, Blake. You'll be back in like a month. I never care enough to see you off."
"On that note," he says, dragging himself up. "I told O I'd hang out with her tonight, and it's getting late. Clarke, you know the way back or do you need me to take you?"
"Go with him," Raven says, before Clarke can come up with an answer. "I've got shit to get done." She pauses and adds, "Come back in the morning."
It would be weird to argue with her, so a Clarke just smiles and says, "Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow."
"Raven and O are about the only people who still trust me here," Bellamy remarks as they walk. "Well, them and Miller, but you won't have any trouble with Miller. And he never vouches for anyone anyway. So, yeah. I'm leaving you in the best shape I can."
"Thanks. Seriously."
He shrugs. "You seem like you're going to stick around, so--yeah. No problem."
"Who's Miller?"
"Thief." He smirks at her shocked expression. "His dad is a security officer in one of the cities, I forget which one. He talked them into sending Miller out here instead of to jail when he got caught. City officers don't care about the colonies, and it's not like there's much of anything worth stealing out here. And it was some Robin Hood shit anyway; he fits in a lot better as a colonist. You'll run into him sooner or later." He clears his throat. "I told him you're cool, that's all he needs. Raven and O take more convincing. I'm expecting you to survive until I get back. Don't let me down."
"I'm not going anywhere."
"Good." He pauses in the town square, in view of the mayor's house. "I need to pick some stuff up. I assume you can make it back from here."
"I could have made it from Raven's." There's a lump in her throat, and she tries to swallow past it. "Thanks. For everything. I--seriously, this was one of the worst months of my life. I don't know what I would have done without you."
"Don't mention it. It was nice to have company." He nods, a little awkward. "See you next month, Clarke."
And then he's gone.
Wells is sitting outside his father's house, reading, and he looks Clarke over with wry amusement. "What happened?"
"What do you mean?"
"You're sweaty, covered in dirt, and probably sunburned."
"Oh. That."
"That," he agrees, amused.
"I was helping Bellamy weed. And then just hanging out. You should have come with us. It was fun. You could have gotten to know people. Worked on having friends."
"I didn't want to spook anyone. Are you working for Raven?"
"I'm going back tomorrow, so I assume so, yeah." She pokes him. "You're coming with me."
Wells smiles. "Trying to get me in with the locals?"
"As promised." She squints at him. "If you're not in with the locals, what do you do all day, anyway? Spy on them and wish you were included?"
"I've been helping the scientists out. They're not involved in politics, really, and they're always looking for help, so--that's been cool."
"So your three basic groups are colonists, scientists, and your dad?"
"Yup. Colonists versus Dad, with scientists in the middle, tracking raccoons."
"Will the scientists mind if you come meet Raven tomorrow?"
"No," he says, voice a little odd. "They like Raven."
She doesn't figure out why he was acting weird until he comes down the next morning and he's dressed up. All Clarke has to do is raise her eyebrows and he flushes dark.
"What?"
"Wear something normal."
"This is normal."
"Your shirt has a collar. You look like you want to sell her something. And if you're trying to sell yourself, you want to look like a colonist, not a politician. Work clothes. You're going to help me move metal. That's why I'm bringing you."
"I just wanted to make a good impression," he mutters, but he goes upstairs without further protest.
So Wells has a thing for Raven; it makes sense. Raven is gorgeous and smart and passionate, exactly the kind of girl Wells likes. And he doesn't know what to do about it because none of the colonists will talk to him.
Thank goodness she's here. Clearly, he'd be lost without her.
When he comes back down, he's in a plain shirt and work pants, and Clarke nods her head in approval.
"You've got good arms, those are good to show off."
"Not like Bellamy does," he mutters, and she pats his shoulder.
"Raven said they're not a thing, so I think you've got a shot."
Wells gives her a half-hearted scowl. "That obvious, huh?"
"I'm your best friend, I'm supposed to know this stuff. And I was bringing you anyway, so it's not like it's going to be obvious to her. Just tell me you didn't get into revolutionary politics to get girls."
"Doesn't everyone?" he asks, grinning.
Raven is outside this time when Clarke arrives, sitting in a low chair, working on a small engine. She looks a little wary when she sees Wells, but it's not like Clarke wasn't honest about him.
"Honestly, I was wondering if you were gonna follow Bellamy off world," she remarks.
"Why does everyone think I can't handle Mars?" Clarke grumbles. "I like Mars."
"Yeah, that's not what I was thinking." She turns her attention to Wells. "Mayor."
"I usually go by Wells," he says. "Clarke said she needed help moving stuff."
"Did Bellamy give you a list of shit he wants you to do when he isn't around to bug me?" Raven asks.
"No, but if we want to be efficient, we need to organize your spare parts. Then I can get stuff for you and you can focus on work."
Raven seems to be thinking it over, but she finally just nods.
"Fine. It is kind of a fucking wreck. That part is actually a fucking wreck. Let's see what we can do."
Organizing and moving Raven's stuff takes them a few days, and they don't talk politics or anything, but Clarke can see Raven relaxing around Wells as they go, Wells' natural amiability and warmth making it easy. They clearly know each other, if not well, and while there's still something guarded in her eyes when she looks at both of them, Clarke thinks it's more stubbornness than anything else.
Octavia shows up on the fourth day, with a man Clarke hasn't met yet.
"Wow, this place almost looks like a human lives here," Octavia remarks.
"Don't worry, I'll fuck it up again in no time," says Raven. "Hey, O. You know Clarke and Wells, right?"
If Octavia thinks it's weird that Raven is casually introducing Wells, she shows no sign of it. "Yeah. Clarke, I don't think you know Lincoln?"
"No," says Clarke, standing and wiping her hands on her pants. "I'm Clarke, nice to meet you."
"Bell's friend," Octavia supplies.
"Nice to meet you too," says Lincoln. He's a large man, tattoos on his neck, the kind of person who should maybe be frightening, but he smile is the gentlest Clarke has ever seen. "Octavia thought the three of you might need help with some of the larger pieces."
"Octavia wanted to snoop," Raven grumbles, but she's smiling.
"All of the above, and Octavia's brother made her promise to check in," she says. "I can have all kinds of motivations."
"Your brother worries too much," Raven says, at the same time Clarke says, "I don't need checking in on."
Octavia smirks. "Anyway. What can we do?"
Clarke has been trying not to think about Bellamy, just because--she doesn't like feeling like she's leaning on people, and there's a part of her that resents how much she misses him. She's fine on her own.
She just kind of liked it, having him around.
It's nice having Octavia around too, though. Lincoln is lower impact, fairly quiet, but Clarke likes him, and Octavia keeps up a steady stream of conversation. Having grown up on the colony, it's clear she's something of a younger sister to a lot of the long-time residents, and the affection between her and Raven is clear. And while Clarke doesn't know exactly what Bellamy said to her about Wells, there's an obvious sense of Octavia feeling him out, tentative steps toward including him in the group.
Wells can't keep a grin off his face, and Clarke feels like if nothing else, this will have been worth it. Coming out here was the right choice if only to help Wells find his place.
"Raven, are you coming tonight?" Octavia asks once they're done, far too casual.
Clarke watches the tension ratchet up Raven's back. "No."
"Sorry, wrong answer," says Octavia, with a significant look at Clarke. "Try again."
It's not hard to figure out her line here. "What's tonight?"
"Just a party. Nothing big. Monty's been making moonshine--"
"Which is illegal, and you're talking about it in front of the mayor's son," Raven interjects.
"Moonshine sounds great," says Wells, on cue. "The tax on alcohol isn't the stupidest decision they made about Mars, but it's up there." He smiles. "A party would be fun."
"Maybe for you," Raven says. "Less fun when you can't dance."
"I can never dance," Wells says. "And Clarke is a disaster dancing."
"It's different," Raven snaps, and Wells sobers immediately.
"I know. Or, I don't. I don't have any real idea what you're going through. But--is it really going to be better if you're just here alone while your friends are having fun? It's not like you can't drink and make fun of something. I don't know what, specifically, but someone there must be worth making fun of."
"Monty still thinks his dance moves are what's going to win Miller over," Octavia offers. "And apparently Clarke and Wells can't dance."
"Clarke won't be trying," Clarke says, holding up her hands. "I'll heckle with Raven."
"Also acceptable," says Octavia. "I assume you have an excuse you can give your dad, little mayor?"
"Again, I go by Wells," he says. "Just tell us when and where."
*
The party feels like the real start of Clarke's time in Ark Colony. Not that the days before it were meaningless, or even bad, but it's the party that introduces her to the broader colony, the kids around her age or a little older, the ones who came in the few years on their own or with their parents, the ones who consider Mars theirs in a fierce way that's going to cause a lot more problems before it gets better.
But she likes them, and even if she doesn't feel as if she quite fits in yet, she feels like she'll be decently happy. And Wells does fit in, thriving as soon as he has the chance to prove himself, just like she knew he would. This is just where he should be.
She spends most of her time after that with Raven, still, but it expands little by little. She meets Bellamy's friend Miller, the thief, whom she likes immediately, and the younger scientists, Monty, Jasper, and Maya, who invite her to check out their operation any time she wants, helping to further fill her days. It's the beginnings of a life, and more of one than she had on Earth, if she's honest.
She emails Bellamy every few days. He warns her early on that he's a terrible correspondent, both because he hates writing emails and because his connection is spotty when he's in transit, but she doesn't actually mind. He tends to write short responses unless something catches his interest, in which case he can go on for paragraphs and paragraphs, on subjects as varied as the part of the ship that's malfunctioning to a particularly interesting historical anecdote he just read to a story she should use to embarrass Octavia the next time she needs to do that.
It's not as if she's counting down the days to when he gets back to Mars, but, well. She still knows exactly when it's supposed to be, if everything remains on schedule.
So when he shows up two days early at Raven's, she's caught completely off guard.
"You guys always work outside now?" he asks, and Clarke's head jerks up so hard she's worried she might hurt herself. He sits down next to her before she can do anything, offering her a small smile. "Still here."
"Still here," she says.
"Cool."
"You're early."
"Sometimes we pick up a little time." He catches his bottom lip with his teeth, and Clarke tries not to stare. She'd been missing him, but she sort of forgot what he looked like, in person. It's a lot to take in. "Kane says we'll still be on the same schedule to go out, so I get to stay for four whole days."
"Wow, four whole days," she teases.
"Shut up. The last time I was off ship for that long I was on Earth and it sucked, I had nothing to do. This will actually be fun."
"For someone who claims to like his life, you complain about it a lot."
He throws a handful of grass in her general direction. "How's it going here?"
"Fine. Did you tell your sister to check up on me?"
"Not very often. I think she just started liking you. And she said you liked Lincoln, so she's expecting you to talk me around on him. It's not going to work, but you can pretend you tried."
"Why do you need talking around?"
"She's sixteen, he's twenty-two."
"And?"
"That's way too old for her," he grumbles.
"How old are you, Clarke?" Raven asks, and Clarke starts, guilty. She'd honestly kind of forgotten Raven was there.
"Seventeen."
"And you're still twenty-one, right, Blake?"
"Good to see you too, Raven," Bellamy says, and throws some grass at her too.
"I didn't even get a hug. But you were busy, so--"
Bellamy rolls his eyes and leans over to wrap Raven up. "You're a fucking dick. I'm not even giving you the present I got you."
"You got me a present?"
"Just some power cells, don't get too excited. I got you some paints," he adds, ostensibly to Clarke, but he's not looking at her, and she can't help teasing him a little.
"You know I have paint, right?"
"Fine, I'll give them to O."
"I never said that!"
"Jesus, I cannot handle this," Raven says, pushing herself up on her crutches. "I'm going to go find Wells, he said he needed repairs. Clarke, I'll see you tonight? You coming, Bellamy?"
"Coming where?"
"Monty's weekly moonshine party. You're actually around for once."
He looks unnerved. "You're going?"
"Not like I was happier being a fucking hermit, right?"
"Speak for yourself," Bellamy says, but he's clearly pleased. "I love being a fucking hermit."
"Yeah, I can tell. See you guys there, right?"
"You're sure you don't need help?" Clarke hedges. On the one hand, Wells might kill her if he finds out she deprived him of alone time with Raven, but that's an improvement over Raven overdoing it and hurting herself.
"It's climate control repair," Raven says. "I'll be fine."
"You're gonna fix the climate control in the mayor's house?" Bellamy asks, eyebrows shooting up.
"No, I'm just gonna fix Wells' climate control," Raven says, not making eye contact with either of them. "I made him swear up and down it wouldn't help his dad, so--fuck you."
"That worked faster than I thought it would," Bellamy remarks, once she's gone. "I'm gone for a month and Raven is going to parties and hanging out with the mayor's kid?"
"He's my best friend," Clarke says, mild. "And a great guy."
"I've got nothing against him. I just thought it would take Raven longer. You really are a miracle worker."
"Speaking of which," she says, pushing up off the ground. "I've got a project. You want to help?" She offers him a hand up, and he takes it and lets her pull him up too.
"Depends. What's the project?"
"I think I can make Raven a better brace. My mom was a doctor and I know a few things about it. And her current one's a piece of shit. But I'm pretty sure if I told her I was going to do it, she'd tell me it was a waste of time and resources and I shouldn't bother."
"Safe bet," Bellamy agrees. "Yeah, I can help with that. What did you need?"
It's a nice way to spend the rest of the afternoon. Clarke finds Raven's old brace for sizing, and Bellamy turns out to have learned how to sew from his mother, so he stitches together padding and consults on the metalworking when Clarke needs it, and by dinner time, they have a passable brace.
"Do you eat with the mayor?" he asks, cracking his neck.
"The mayor's in the city right now. Meeting with Governor Wallace. Wells and I will be fending for ourselves."
"Or you could come eat with me."
"With Octavia and Indra?"
"No, just me," he says, ducking his head so his curls fall in his eyes. "Octavia's in the city too, on business, so--"
"So you're asking me to eat with you so you won't be all alone."
"Basically."
It feels stupid, honestly. He'll be gone in four days again, and she won't be lonely, because she has Wells, and she's starting to have Raven and Octavia and Monty and some of the other colonists. She doesn't need him to lean on, but she still likes him better than anyone else.
"If you're going to be all alone," she says.
*
Four days pass in almost no time. Bellamy spends most of his time at Raven's, and Raven makes pointed comments about how unnecessary it is for him to hang around, which he ignores. Clarke knows Raven thinks he's there just to see her, and she thinks Raven might even be right, but--what does it really matter? He'll be gone again in no time. And Clarke isn't going to protest if he wants to spend the time he has to spend with her. She wants that too.
And even if Raven is right about his reasons to stay, Clarke isn't convinced she's figured out his deeper motivations. It's obvious he wants to look after her, and it raises her hackles a little. She's been doing fine on her own. If he thinks he needs to skulk around Raven's to make sure Clarke's all right, he's wrong.
But if he wants to skulk around because he likes spending time with her, that's fine.
And if either reason was enough to get him to stay, she'd mind that even less. But strangely, she can't actually imagine Bellamy on Mars, not really. Everyone has a place here, and he doesn't. The whole time he's around, he's just following someone else around, either his sister or Raven or--her, now. He follows her a lot, and she doesn't mind, but she's aware that it's because he doesn't have a life of his own here.
She's still going to miss him, of course, but it makes sense, that he's leaving.
"You don't need to go back to Earth?" he asks. She's lingering outside his house with him on his last night, because he never likes walking her all the way back Jaha's. Not that Jaha actually cares, but--Bellamy doesn't trust the mayor, and Clarke can't blame him. It makes her feel a little antsy, too, living there. Not that she's in danger, it just allies her with Jaha in a way that she doesn't like.
"There's nothing for me on Earth," she says. "Why would I go back?"
"You decided you hate Mars? I don't know. I'm just making sure before I leave. It would suck for you if you decided tomorrow you want to go back and it's too late."
"I don't hate Mars. Besides, Wells would totally crash and burn trying to flirt with Raven without me to help out." It's not even close to true--Wells is doing way better with that than she expected--but as she hoped, it distracts Bellamy.
"Jaha's flirting with Raven?" he asks.
"Yeah. I think he's doing pretty well with it, honestly."
"She's doing really well," Bellamy says, with a small, almost disbelieving smile. "She's got the new brace, she's actually being social--you did more in a month than I have in a year."
"Yeah, well, you were only here for about a month of the year cumulatively, right? Also, I'm pretty sure you're not the right person to help anyone learn to be social."
He snorts. "Thanks for the support, Clarke."
"Any time."
There's a pause, and Clarke knows she should be leaving, but--she doesn't know how. She thought maybe the month away from him would change things, now that she has other people around, other friends here for company and comfort.
And she does. So--that's good. It's nice to know it's not a dependence thing.
"Uh, what are you doing tonight?" he asks, rubbing the back of his neck.
"I don't know. Reading, probably. Art. Making fun of Wells."
"You could come watch a vid with me?" he offers, almost shy, and Clarke feels herself relax.
"Yeah. That sounds good."
She sends Wells a message so he won't worry and follows Bellamy into his house. It's her first time in there, and it--kind of sucks, honestly.
"I don't live here," he says, when she can't help making a face. It's musty. "Sorry it's not the mayor's mansion."
"I don't care about a mansion, this place is just a pit," she says.
"Thanks."
"I assume if you lived here it would be better." She pauses. "You know, I could clean it up."
"The bedroom's fine," he says, and then flushes. "Uh, I meant--that's where I hang out when I'm here, so--"
"Yeah, that's fine," Clarke says. "I was trying to tell me you should let me live in your house, though."
"I should?"
"It's--weird. Living with Jaha. And with Wells. Their place is huge--"
"It would have to be, to hold all your shit," he teases, and she shoves him gently. He grins. "You want to move in with me, huh?"
"You're not doing anything with it most of the time. And I don't want to build my own place."
He wets his lips. "People are going to talk if you do that."
"They do already. I get the impression you don't like a lot of people, so--"
"Yeah." And then he steps in, giving her the chance to move away. When she doesn't, he leans in, but she has to be the one to close the distance all the way.
Bellamy's lips are warm and still wet from his tongue, and he smells and tastes like Martian soil, the tang of it different from how it is on Earth. She pulls back after just a second, just long enough to check, and he bites back on a smile and then comes back in, sliding his hands up her arms. He kisses her soft and slow, just the press of his mouth on hers, until she darts her tongue against his lips, and then he groans and slides his hands into her hair, his control breaking. Her fingers bunch in the fabric of his shirt and she holds him close as the kiss turns wet, stumbling back until she hits the wall.
"This really wasn't what I had in mind when I asked you to come over," he says, between kisses.
"Why not? It's what I had in mind."
"Because I'm leaving tomorrow, and it's going to suck now."
Clarke tugs his hair gently. "Way to kill the mood."
"Sorry," he says, kissing under her jaw. "I should have done this as soon as I got back."
"You should have."
"I will next time." His mouth finds hers again. "You can have the house. Someone should use it. I was gonna tell O to take it when she wanted it, but she's just going to move in with Lincoln."
"They're not even dating yet," she says, smiling and rubbing her fingers in his hair, absently soothing. "But, yeah, she likes him. And he's a really sweet guy. And he's not that much older than she is."
Bellamy groans and drops his forehead onto her shoulder. "This is a really awesome moment for me, can we not ruin it with talking about Octavia's love life?"
"You missed me too, huh?" Clarke teases.
"Yeah," he says, tugging her closer. "I missed you too."
*
They do end up on his bed watching a vid, but Clarke gets to spend the whole time cuddled against his chest, which is a huge improvement over just sitting next to him, and when they finish there's only minimal awkwardness about her going home. Clarke doesn't quite know how to ask if she can stay, but Bellamy just kisses her, tugs off his shirt, and says, "If you're moving in, this is going to be your bed, so you might as well get used to it, right?"
Clarke is only briefly distracted by his bare chest.
"Right," she says, and pulls her own shirt off in revenge.
He wakes up way too early, and Clarke tightens her arms around him, making a sleepy noise of protest. She feels his lips press against her hair before he disentangles himself.
"Trust me, I don't want to leave either," he says. After a pause, he adds, "You sure you don't want to come to Earth?"
"And then back to Mars?"
"And then back to Mars."
"I wouldn't have anything to do. Following you around while you work isn't a very appealing option when I know we could be making out."
"We could find something for you to do." He pauses. "You should think about it. If you--obviously if you like Mars, you should stay, but if you wanted to come with me, you could."
"Kane would love that," she says, but he probably wouldn't mind, honestly. "I'd need something, Bellamy. I like you, but just following you around on supply runs isn't--"
He leans down to kiss her. "I know. Like I said, think about it. If I had something for you. Because I could come up with something. Something real," he adds, before she can protest. "Just think about it." He gives her one more kiss, like he can't bring himself to go. "I'll see you in a month. Don't burn my house down."
"With my drawing charcoal?" she teases.
"I'm not going to specify how you shouldn't burn my house down. There is no way it's okay for you to burn my house down." He wets his lips, takes one last look at her, and then nods. "Next month."
"Next month," she agrees, and watches him go.
She tries to go back to sleep, but her mind won't stop working. Part of her wants to go after him and tell him she'll come after all, but--she already ran to Mars because she didn't have anyone on Earth, and she doesn't want the rest of her life to just be following the person she likes best around until they die or she finds someone else she likes better.
If she goes with Bellamy someday, it needs to be the right decision. It needs to be what she wants.
Like most of the colony houses, Bellamy's is thin and tall, three rooms stacked on top of each other, because the terraformed areas just don't tend to be very large, and although Ark Colony has more square footage than most of the others, it's because the vast majority of it is designated as forest.
Bellamy sleeps on the third floor, in a cramped attic room, because his mother and sister used to share the second, and he's never been home long enough that it was worth it to him to move to the larger room. He gave her his blessing to do it if she wanted, but it will take a lot of work to make that room livable. It's clear that the only use Bellamy makes of it is as a point of transit between his kitchen and his bedroom.
The first step is obviously going to see Wells.
Thelonius is in the city again, and Clarke privately thinks that if he really wants people to respect him as a leader, he should actually contribute to the community, but that's Wells' hill to die on, not hers. Although now that she's not living with him, maybe it should be. She's one of the few people in the colony who could have that fight with Thelonius without fearing too much for her own well-being.
Another thing to think about.
"Someone was out all night," Wells teases, when she finds him in the large kitchen of the mansion.
"And I didn't even get laid," Clarke says, keeping her voice casual. "But I'm moving in, so that's probably even better, right?"
Wells chokes on his water. "Moving in? I thought he was leaving."
"He left this morning, yeah. But he's not using his house and--I love you, I do, but it's weird, living with you and your dad. I don't fit in here. Bellamy's place is kind of a wreck, but at least it's--" Her mouth trips over the word mine, because it's weird to say, even if it feels true. "I think it'd be better. You can come, if you want. He's got two bedrooms. Kind of."
"I think that would be weirder," he says. "You know what people are going to assume, if you move into his house, right?"
"They wouldn't be wrong."
"Oh," says Wells, a little awkward, and Clarke offers him a smile.
"Sorry. It's new. Just--I like him."
"Yeah, that much was pretty obvious," he says, and Clarke shoves him gently.
"Anyway, I need to get him one of those lifts like Raven has. So she can visit. I assume you want to help?"
"Obviously."
Getting that set up takes most of the day, even with Octavia and Lincoln's help, once they show up. But Clarke doesn't feel right, living somewhere Raven can't go. Stairs wouldn't be a problem, but the houses are cramped enough they just use ladders, and ladders are too much for Raven to handle, so the lift is really the only option.
If Octavia is surprised Clarke is moving into her brother's house and making it accessible for Raven, she shows no sign of it. Clarke figures it was pretty obvious, honestly. Everyone knew she liked Bellamy.
Raven's response is pretty much the same as Octavia's, except for a choked-up second when she realizes that Clarke's top priority in making Bellamy's house livable was making it accessible to her.
Once the emotion passes, though, Raven can't help teasing her a little. "I can't believe you let him go."
"Hey, I was mostly naked. If he wanted to leave that, it's on him." Raven snorts, and Clarke grins. "I'm going to be cleaning for a few days, but I bet Wells can do most of the shit I do for you while I'm gone."
Raven rolls her eyes, which Clarke basically deserves. She was not being subtle. "Or we could both just help you and you'd get done faster. Someone needs to deal with Bellamy's fucking shitheap. And I don't have any pressing jobs for a few days." She shrugs. "Good cause, right?"
It's two days later, while just she and Raven are cleaning out the master bedroom, that Clarke says, "He asked me to go with him."
"Of course he did. Bellamy doesn't do feelings much, so when he does, they totally kick his ass."
"Yeah?"
Raven looks thoughtful, picking up an old picture of a woman who must be Bellamy's mother, with her son holding his baby sister in his arms. She wipes it off with her sleeve. "Don't get jealous. So far he's only ever gotten that stupid over his sister, his friends, and his ship. And he's really fucking stupid about you. He sent me a bunch of emails."
"About what?"
"Everything but you. It was fucking ridiculous. He'd ask me absolutely everything except how is Clarke doing, it was so fucking obvious."
"Why didn't it work with you and him?"
"We never really tried, honestly. Don't get me wrong, Bellamy's great and he's really hot, but--that's not how we are. I needed to blow off steam and he was willing to help. And that was great, but I'm looking for someone a little less--Bellamy." She throws Clarke a smile. "Trust me, as far as I'm concerned, he's all yours."
"You know who's really great and a lot less Bellamy," Clarke says, all innocence, and Raven rolls her eyes.
"I know. Shut up."
Bellamy actually calls that night, which is enough of a surprise she nearly fails to pick up. But not quite.
His face is poorly lit and the connection is laggy, but Clarke still can't help grinning. "Hi."
"Hey. We're passing by a cruise ship, I'm stealing their net connection."
"Wow."
"Figured it was worth a shot. Assume I'll disappear in like five minutes."
"So we shouldn't start having vid sex."
He makes a sound somewhere between a laugh and a choke. "Uh, if you want to, go ahead. Don't stop on my account. Please."
"Glad I have your approval." She pauses. "So--how's the flight?"
"Fine. How's the house?"
"Way better than when you left. You suck at home ownership."
"Definitely true. In my defense, I got it when I was fourteen and haven't lived there for more than like three days at a time for the last seven years, and I always have better stuff to do when I'm around than clean it up."
"Yeah, but you still basically suck."
"Still true." He clears his throat. "I, uh. I did want to apologize for running out on you."
Clarke frowns. "Why? I knew you were leaving. It wasn't like you caught me by surprise or anything."
"Yeah, but--I felt bad. We didn't even get a chance to talk."
"We did. Did you think we needed to talk more?"
He makes a frustrated sound. "I just--a month is a long time."
Clarke feels her blood run cold. "It's really not."
"Yeah, but--it's always going to be a month. I don't want you to feel like you're always waiting around for me or anything."
"It doesn't feel like that. I've got plenty do do. Why, do you think you're going to feel like that?"
"I was really, really looking forward to getting back to Mars," he says, with a small smile. "But no, I just--" He groans and flops onto his back. He's kind of a ridiculous person, honestly.
"Why don't you just tell me what you're actually worried about, instead of--whatever it is you're doing right now? It's kind of funny, in a sad way, but talking is a lot easier."
There's a pause while Bellamy thinks this over, and then he finally says, without getting up, "I kind of assumed you wanted to be my girlfriend, but if this is more of a we hook up when I'm around thing, asking you if you wanted to come to Earth with me was probably weird."
Clarke has to bite back on a laugh, just because he sounds genuinely nervous, and it would be mean to laugh at her boyfriend. "Bellamy. Were you seriously stressing about this?"
"No."
"Uh huh."
"I just wanted to make sure."
"I'm not fooling around.," she says. "There's just you."
He sits back up, looking sheepish. "Okay, cool. I got kind of distracted with other stuff and it seemed--worth talking about. Just so we're on the same page."
"I like you and I miss you. Same page?"
"Same page." A smile breaks out on his face. "Okay, uh--tell me about the house? Or whatever. Fill me in. Might as well talk while we've got the chance, right?"
Clarke ends up falling asleep talking to him, and it's--nice. Not like actually having him around, but--as second-best cases go, it could be a lot worse.
*
When Thelonius gets back, he's concerned.
"I don't like you being on your own. You're awfully young to be moving in with a boyfriend, especially one who's gone so often."
It's sort of interesting, in a not-really-very-interesting way, thinking about whether moving in with a boyfriend who's around or one who isn't is more concerning, from Thelonius's perspective. Clarke supposes it depends on if he's more concerned with her virtue or her safety, neither of which is really his business, but at least it's a kind of diverting academic curiosity.
"I understand your concern," she says, diplomatic. She hasn't decided yet if she wants to start fighting with him, and she's going to wait until she's got a political plan formed before she ruins their personal relationship. "And I'm really grateful to you and Wells for letting me stay with you for as long as you did. But I think I'd prefer to have my own space. I do prefer it. I'm much happier at Bellamy's."
"Your parents would like it if you were taken care of," Thelonius says, and Clarke feels her temper flare.
"I'm pretty sure none of this is what my parents would want," she says, cold. "But it's what I want that matters now. And this is what I want. This wasn't--I wasn't asking for your advice, I was telling you what was happening."
His sigh is somehow both patronizing and theatrical; Clarke really needs to talk to Wells about him before she accidentally punches him or something. "If you change your mind, you're of course welcome to come back."
If she changes her mind, she'll probably go to live with Raven. But it's not a bad ending for this conversation, so she just smiles and says, "Thank you."
Later that night, at Monty's party, she asks Wells, "So, can I start fighting with your dad?"
Wells opens and closes his mouth a few times, and then takes a drink of moonshine. "I have a couple questions."
"Sure, go ahead," says Clarke.
Apparently this was not the response Wells was hoping for, because his frown deepens. "Are you not fighting my dad now?"
"I want to tell him he's a shitty mayor and if he doesn't start turning it around, it's going to cause problems. But, you know. In a way that doesn't make it sound like he's going to have a rebellion on his hands."
"I thought you were leaving," he says, not an accusation, just--interest.
Clarke glares at Raven anyway, and Raven holds up her hands. "All I said was you said Bellamy asked. Which is true, right? You said he did."
"Yeah, but I never said I was going." She has been thinking about it--she's been thinking about it non-stop, honestly, wondering what it would be like. And she can't imagine keeping on like she did on that first trip, following Bellamy around, letting him teach her how to maintain the ship, but if she had a place there, a real place, a role of her own, she thinks it might be almost perfect. She likes space, and she likes being with Bellamy, in his own element. In what might be her element.
She is her father's daughter, after all.
"You're totally going," Raven says. "Why wouldn't you go?"
"Because it's weird. Bellamy's great, but--" She huffs. "What would I do on a ship? On Kane's ship. He's--he knew my parents. I'm always just going to be a kid to him. Or, maybe, if I'm lucky, Bellamy's girlfriend. And that's not what I want. I want to be--" She struggles for the word. "I need to be useful. And I don't know how I'd be useful on that ship."
Raven whistles, like she's impressed. "Not much for getting carried away with romance, huh?"
"Romance is great for the first few days. But after two weeks? Yeah, I'd need something to do. It's his job, not a honeymoon."
"Yeah, I get that." She glances at Wells, and it makes Clarke feel--she's not quite sure. She's happy for him, but it's a strange kind of happiness.
Wells fits here, and she doesn't. Not really. She'll be fine for a while, but--Wells loves Mars in a way Clarke isn't sure she ever will. Wells cares about it here. If she doesn't go with Bellamy, she's going to have to go somewhere. Once Wells is settled. Once she's sure. She's still got her own place to find.
"What do you even do on a ship?" she grumbles, and Raven grins.
"You know, we could refocus your training. I know plenty about what you'd need to do. And it's only a matter of time before Bellamy gets his own ship."
It somehow hadn't occurred to her as a possibility. "His own ship?"
"Octavia's about old enough to take care of herself," Raven says, watching her and Lincoln dancing in the middle of the room. Octavia is laughing and Lincoln is smiling, and Clarke likes these people, she does. "And that's the only reason he was working for Kane. Kane runs--expensive stuff. It's where the money is." She grins. "But you know Bellamy. He's a revolutionary at heart."
"His own ship," she says again.
"Sounds a lot better than Kane's ship, huh?"
"I could learn more about being useful on a ship," Clarke says, by way of answer.
Raven snorts. "I told you you weren't going to be around that long," she says, smug, and Clarke doesn't bother answering.
*
As hard as it was to really picture herself on Kane's ship, it's even harder to not picture herself Bellamy's ship. It wouldn't even have to be--Clarke isn't naive. She knows that she's young and Bellamy is too, and they haven't known each other for that long. There's no guarantee that the two of them will last, as a couple, for any time at all, even if she wants them to. Even if she likes him so much now.
Like Raven said, she's not one for getting carried away with romance.
But they'd be a good team even if they didn't last, she's sure. They could still run a fucking awesome ship together. They might be able to convince Raven to come back to Earth, to see if there's surgery she could get to repair her leg enough she could come too, if she wanted. If she'd be happier in space than on Mars.
She doesn't know how to ask about it on an email--she doesn't know how close he is to getting a ship of his own, and he's never mentioned it himself--but they talk about other things. She sends him pictures of the house, which is looking better, and tells him about her tentative arguments with Thelonius, which mostly just involve her telling him he's being a dick, and him ignoring her.
Wells will do better with it. He's going to figure out how to lead here, and Clarke will be there to help, if he needs her. But this isn't her battle. She'll find her own way to contribute.
She'll get her own place.
"My brother's really into you," Octavia remarks. Bellamy's going to be back in a week, if they're on schedule, and Clarke is already antsy with anticipation, equally excited and nervous to see him again.
She misses him, and she wants to see him, and she feels fucking thirteen, giddy with feelings.
"Yeah," says Clarke. "I was hoping he was." Octavia frowns, like this was somehow not the answer she was expecting, and Clarke offers her a smile and a small shrug. "Sorry, did he not tell you I'm into him too?"
She huffs. "He did, but--he's dumb." It's strange to watch her sober, grow thoughtful. She's not used to quiet pensiveness from Octavia, who always seems to be a bright ball of energy. "Bell doesn't know how to stay here."
"I know." She worries her lip. "I don't know why he doesn't, though. He grew up here, right? I know he's been gone for seven years, but--he loves it, right? I don't care about staying either," she adds quickly. "It's not that. It was just weird, seeing him here, after he talked about Mars. He made it sound like it was his home, but then I saw him here, and--"
"He doesn't know what he'd do," Octavia says, and Clarke gets it. Of course she gets it. "I like the woods, I like--everything. But Bell doesn't want to be a lumberjack or a farmer." She gives Clarke a wry smile. "He's just waiting for the revolution, honestly."
"Yeah," says Clarke. "I know the feeling."
"So, you're cleaning up the house, but--"
"Raven said he'll get his own ship one of these days. I assume he's going to need a crew for that, and I figure I've got an in. Since he likes me."
"And he's how much older than you?"
Clarke laughs. "Four years."
"Tell him he's a dick, okay? I'll tell him too, but he can never hear it too often."
"That's not going to be the first thing I tell him," Clarke says. "But I'll let him know, sure."
Octavia's also the one who lets her know exactly when the Halcyon will be getting to the spaceport, because Octavia has a radio she uses to keep up with ship arrivals and departures, so she can sweep in, buy things before anyone else shows up, and resell them to rich people for much more than she paid.
Clarke is honestly a little jealous; she wishes she was as on top of what she wanted as Octavia is.
But obviously she's going to go meet him. Raven's helping Wells with something; she wouldn't want to interrupt. She's a good friend; it's not completely selfish.
It's strange, going back to the spaceport. Her favorite part is still the tram ride out, through the alien landscape of unterraformed Mars. This is what she came for, not the colonies, not the politics, but the exhilaration of another world, the feeling of being somewhere else, in fucking space.
The novelty might wear off someday. But if they stop liking it, they can always figure out something else.
The Halycon comes in right on time, and Clarke watches them unload from a distance, waiting until they're done to go say hello, except--Bellamy isn't there. She sees the rest of the crew, with no sign of him, and panic wells in her throat. But if something had happened--they'd be worried, right? Clarke heard from him yesterday, and if he'd somehow gotten hurt between then and now, they'd be getting him medical attention, not unloading.
She makes her way through the crowd toward Kane, past smaller ships, until she feels an arm wrap around her waist. Instinctively, she slams her foot down on her attacker, and Bellamy yelps.
"Okay, uh--bad idea," he says, as she whirls on him. "Fuck. Sorry. I just--hi."
"Where were you? I was worried!" she says, and then throws her arms around him, because it's still great to see him.
"I think you broke my foot," he says, holding her close. "Hi."
"Hi. Welcome back. How long before you ship out again?"
He pulls back to look at her. "Well, uh--kind of up to you, honestly." He jerks his head back, and Clarke takes in, for the first time, the ship behind him, something smaller and sleeker than the Halycon, something that would just need a small crew, two or three people, at most. "It's gonna need a little more work anyway," he continues, and she can see color creeping up his neck. "Maybe a new coat of paint. And you can, uh--yeah."
"Did you talk to Raven?"
"About what?"
"A new ship."
"She knows I've been looking. But--I was waiting for the right ship to come along, and there it was on Earth. I was going to ask you, but we'd only been dating for two weeks. That's too soon for you to get ship-veto powers."
Clarke walks over, skates her fingers over the hull. "You already got a ship."
"Sorry?"
When she looks back at him, he's watching her, expression anxious, trying to figure out what her reaction is. "I wanted to come with you, but I was having trouble figuring out what I'd do on Kane's ship. And then Raven said you'd get your own pretty soon, and that--" She grins. "That sounded awesome, honestly."
Bellamy's own grin flashes out in response. "Yeah?"
"Can I see it?"
He slides his hand into hers, tugging her up into the ship. "I was hoping you'd want to, yeah."
*
They get the new ship hauled out to Ark, so Raven can examine every inch of it and tell Bellamy he paid too much for it and the systems are all shit. It's not true, Bellamy knows his stuff, but Raven wants to say it, and Bellamy wants to let her. Clarke sits in the grass with Bellamy's head in her lap as Raven reviews it, Wells next to her, shaking his head in fond amusement.
"So, when are you guys leaving?" he asks.
"I never said I was going," Clarke protests, and Bellamy raises his eyebrows at her. She tugs his hair gently. "I am, I just don't like everybody assuming."
"Yeah, how dare we," he teases.
"Not answering my question," Wells says, but he looks fond and amused.
"Tomorrow?" Bellamy asks. "Day after? I don't know. Whenever Raven decides we're fit to fly."
"Didn't you fly back from Earth?"
"Yeah, but I'd rather have her check it over than me any day."
"That's because I'm better than you," Raven says. Wells gets up, as casually as he can, so he's there if Raven needs help getting down, but he doesn't just offer. It makes Clarke smile; all he needed was a chance, and she gave him that. He's going to be all set, when she leaves.
And it's not as if she's never coming back.
"You taught me everything I know," says Bellamy. "Of course you're better than me. I'm a shitty mechanic. That's why Clarke's handling repairs and I'm piloting."
"Where are you even going?" Raven asks. "Do you have cargo runs yet?"
"Not yet." Bellamy looks at Clarke. "Wherever the hell we want, I guess."
She leans down to press her lips against his forehead. "Wherever the hell we want."
It sounds like a pretty great place to be, from where she's sitting.
