Archive of Our Own

They've started hanging out more since the world didn't end. It was easier with the ones who knew. He didn't have to pretend around Dustin and the kids, or Robin, or in this case, Eddie. And after all the trouble he'd gone to making sure the guy got out alive, sometimes it was just nice to check in on him. He liked to make sure Eddie was doing ok with becoming one of the people who unfortunately did know.

They're watching a movie in the new trailer, an old '50s sci-fi about aliens taking over with mind control. Eddie's pick, though he'd teasingly commented while popping the tape in, "don't worry big boy, it's pretty mild. Nothing you can't handle." It was nice that he considered Steve in little ways like that, even if he was kind of a dick about it.

At one point Eddie leans over and speaks right over the movie, "so you know scary movies aren't really about what they're about, right?" He'd been angling for Steve to give horror more of a chance lately.

"What?"

"Well, there's this theory that the aliens actually represent Russia, 'cause back then, and still now really, everyone was so paranoid about them infiltrating society and brainwashing the neighbours-"

Steve snorts. "They weren't brainwashing anyone, they were..." He notices Eddie's attention swing over to him, his eyes wide. "Fuck, did we not tell you about the Russians?"

"No, you did not tell me about any fuckin' Russians, Harrington." He shakes his head, still unused to the kind of logical leaps that come with being in the know. "Shit, if we're getting into some real life conspiracies, should we..." He trails off, pulling a joint from behind his ear and holding it up between them.

Steve grins. There had been a while when even weed had been too much for him after Starcourt, but he'd started smoking again hanging out with Eddie so often. He grabs the lighter off the coffee table, flicks it on and holds it for Eddie to light up with, cupping his other hand around the flame protectively out of habit.

They pass the joint back and forth, Steve giving Eddie a brief explanation of the mess at the mall, Eddie interrupting here and there. Eventually they settle back into the movie, into the buzzed out calm of the weed, and into each other. Steve feels so comfortable with Eddie. There's no pressure to be any certain way. He doesn't have to pretend it was an earthquake, he doesn't have to pretend he's cool or smart, he can just kind of be.

Sometimes weed still makes him a little anxious, thoughts spinning around and around his head non-stop. With Eddie it's different, though. They're snuggling like he does with Robin sometimes, Eddie's head on Steve's shoulder after sliding down the couch in herbal relaxation. Steve feels floaty, he feels safe, and he feels like he can relax because Eddie is here with him. He got Eddie out. They got what needed to be done, done. He doesn't need to be on guard anymore because everything is ok now, the living proof is right here, fluffy hair tickling his neck.

He does feel a bit warm and tingly, but that's to be expected from good weed. Maybe it's Eddie though. Steve feels the heat coming off of him even where they're not touching, but that's good. More proof that everything is ok. His soft breath against Steve's shoulder, that's proof too. Everything is kind of perfect for a moment.

Steve turns to say, "I'm glad you're..."

But he comes nose to nose with Eddie, who'd looked up when he turned.

His breath hitches, they're so close. Eddie tilts his head, as if in slow motion, holding Steve's gaze.

"Steve?" He whispers.

"Yeah?" Steve whispers back.

Eddie's eyes close for a brief moment, just as his lips press into Steve's. They're warm, soft, and a little chapped. There's a moan, and Steve fleetingly wonders whose it was.

And then it's gone.

Eddie's eyes open wide. He pulls back. Steve's eyes never closed, there wasn't time. Eddie looks scared, broken bottle scared.

"Fuck! Shit, Steve man, I'm so sorry-"

What? Steve thinks. His thoughts start to quicken, start to swirl.

Eddie has those wild eyes, like Steve is going to hurt him. Everything was perfect and now it's not. Steve knows he's done something wrong. He's made Eddie scared. He's made lots of people scared, but it always used to be on purpose. He hasn't done enough to not be scary now, maybe.

"Eddie," he tries. "Eddie, it's ok. It's ok, nothing happened..."

His words break off as Eddie freezes up, shit, now he's really done it. It's like he can sense Eddie's defenses coming up around him, his body tensing as he stands up and backs away into the kitchen. Steve can't feel him anymore, not his breath, not his hair, nor the heat of him. He doesn't know what made things worse, was it his tone of voice or the way he was holding his hands out? He's scared to do more damage.

Now Steve is anxious.

"Get out, Steve." Eddie says evenly, face cold.

"What, why? We can-"

"Please, just get out of my house."

"But, Eddie-"

"Now, Steve!" He shouts, sounding pretty angry, and it shocks Steve into action.

He doesn't really understand what's happening, so many thoughts at once, but he doesn't want to make it worse. He grabs his things, hands a little shaky. He chances a look back at Eddie as he opens the door to leave. Eddie's facing away from him, arms curled around himself, waiting for Steve to leave.

He must notice Steve's hesitation at the door, because he mutters, "just go." It's quiet, but such a flat tone, it doesn't fit coming from Eddie. It makes Steve's stomach screw up in knots to hear him like that.

"I'm sorry?"

A huff. "You don't even know what for."

It doesn't seem like he's going to say anything else or turn around, so Steve leaves. He thinks he hears crying as he walks to his car.

Steve knows he shouldn't be driving like this. He's shivering, reflexes slow even though his mind is racing. He goes slow and drives for a few minutes the wrong way, further out of town towards the woods, before pulling onto the shoulder and turning the car off. He climbs into the back seat and curls up, pulling his jacket tight around him. The car wasn't on long enough to get warm.

He touches his lips idly. They'd kissed. He'd kissed Eddie. Eddie had kissed him? It didn't matter. Not if it made Eddie look broken bottle scared, not if it robbed his voice of all its playfulness. He wishes he'd been able to say the right thing, but somehow he'd made it worse.

A tear escapes, but he's curled up on his side so it runs straight across his nose and into his other eye. He closes them tight, body shaking with cold and nerves.

----------

Consciousness filters in gradually when Steve wakes the next morning, joints stiff. Fuck, his neck is killing him, why did he sleep in his- Oh.

Shit.

It's misty and not very bright yet, even inside the car he can see his breath. Must still be pretty early. He climbs out of the car and pisses in the treeline. He stretches before getting back in and driving home.

Getting ready for work, it's like he's not in his own body. He can barely feel the water on his skin in the shower.

Autopilot mode, he used to call it, just like when his dad used to yell at him. Just do, don't feel, don't think. Go through the motions. He used to do that a lot growing up. At home, at school, in between. The only place he couldn't do it was on the court or out in the baseball field, when he had to stay sharp, but it was better when he was playing. There was always something to focus on.

It feels familiar, sinking into autopilot. He hasn't done it for a while, not fully. Before it had helped, kept him from getting bogged down by anything too painful. Now though, if he wasn't sharp people could die. His kids could die. He flinches just thinking about it before sinking deeper into the blurriness of hiding away, where nothing can hurt him. Just for a bit. They'd dealt with everything urgent, so he can afford to step away to get through the day.

It lasts until he gets to work. Robin meets his eyes and immediately knows something is wrong. She says nothing, but grabs his arm and marches him to the back room, customers be damned. He loves her so much.

"Babe, what's wrong?" She looks really worried, he must look awful.

He tries to get it together for her, not wanting to drag her down, but his vision goes a little blurry as tears build up and he can't get the words out.

"It's ok, it's ok" she says, rubbing his arm and sitting him down in their tiny employee lounge. "Just nod or shake your head. Is it a code red?"

Shake.

"Is one of our people in danger?"

Shake.

"But something's very wrong."

Nod. "Robs,"

"Yeah?"

"Eddie's mad at me. I did something wrong, I think. I don't really know."

She's holding him, so he feels her stiffen. She seems to steel herself and forge on. "Can you tell me what happened?"

"We were watching movies last night and we-" his throat closes up on him and he struggles to take in a deep breath. "We kissed."

"What!?" The unlucky customers waiting on them can probably hear her, she reacts so loudly. It helps though. It breaks the spell.

"I know! I wasn't expecting it."

She looks as shocked as he feels. He watches her process, as she pieces together the tiny crumbs of information and turns them over, seeing if any fit together into something coherent. A look of confusion crosses her face.

"Wait but Steve, you're-"

"Straight? I know!"

Does he, though? She gives him a curious look that seems to ask the same question.

"Wait, but you said he's mad, right? About the kiss?" Robin has a way of doing this, of going off on tangents and then swinging back to pick at loose threads in a conversation. It almost makes him dizzy.

"I think he was scared?"

"Ohhh. Yeah, he could have been. He was the one that kissed you?"

"I don't know, maybe? It happened so fast, like it could have almost been an accident. We were high, so my memory's a little foggy."

She starts pacing as things fall into place, fingers tapping on her crossed arms.

"So you guys were all nice and stoned watching movies, and then there was a kiss somehow, and then he looked scared?"

He nods quickly. "But he doesn't have to be! Does he know I know about you?"

"I dunno if he knows about me, let alone knows you know about me. I'd be pretty fucking terrified if I were him."

"I get that."

She almost smiles at that, but her face is tight. "I really don't think you do, Stevie. You've never had to." She sighs, but comes back over to start petting his hair. He lets her.

"So was he scared or mad, then?"

He takes a deep breath, her presence is grounding and he's starting to feel a little like himself.

"He looked scared at first, so I tried to tell him it was ok, and then something came over him. Like a wall came up around him and I couldn't get through. Then he seemed mad, told me to get out."

"What did you say?"

"Ugh I don't even know, I wish I could remember. I think I probably freaked out a little too." He presses his hands to his eyes and lets out a frustrated grunt. "He just got really angry and told me to leave. I ended up sleeping in my car so I wouldn't have to drive all the way home."

"Jesus, Steve. Ok." Robin lets out a huff, her hands find her hips. "We'll figure it out, it'll be ok." And when he looks up at her face it's so determined, he almost believes her.

The tears are finally slowing, but the weight in the pit of his stomach isn't going away. He nods anyway and she squeezes his shoulders. It's a relief to be able to tell her, to have someone he knows won't judge him for breaking down. Especially about something like this, and she doesn't get too sappy, which helps.

"Stay here until you can breathe again, Stevie. I'll cover the front for a bit."

He hugs his knees up to his chest and nods. "Love you, Robs."

"You too, babe. Just don't leave me out there by myself for too long."

Eventually Steve can breathe again, and he ventures out to help Robin with whatever work doesn't involve talking to people. He sweeps, rewinds, and does all the other meaningless things, brain stuck on how to fix the mess he's made.

He decides to make a plan. Plans feel good, like he's stepping up to bat after waiting his turn behind the fence. He has an idea, thinking about something Robin said. It could be a first step toward fixing things, or at least toward figuring out what the problem is. He feels lighter, this will help, this will make it better. But he'll need help.

"Go see him, Robs," he insists when they've caught up from the afternoon rush.

"Me?"

"Yeah."

"Go see Eddie?"

"Yeah. To make sure he's ok."

"Steve, that makes zero sense. It's between you two, why would I go?" Her face looks really tense. It feels like a test, and Robin never tests him.

The weight in his stomach gets heavier, so he tries to explain. "I want to, but I don't think he'd talk to me right now."

"Oh." She looks down. "I thought for a second, maybe you were worried it would happen again or something."

He shakes his head. "It honestly didn't occur to me. Even if he did like me, I'm pretty sure he hates my guts now."

She wiggles awkwardly. "Yeah, I guess that was stupid. But seriously, I got worried for a sec even though it's you, even though you've been great with... my whole thing."

He nods as she trails off. Clearly he does need to work on being less scary. "And if you thought I was gonna be weird about-" he pauses and checks their corners, "-gay stuff, imagine what he's feeling. If he's scared in a way I can't even understand, then I think he needs to talk to someone who gets it. I have you, but who's he gonna talk to, Dustin?"

Her nose crinkles at the mental image. "Ah fuck, and I do get it." Robin sighs wearily then looks at Steve with that determined look she gets, and he knows she's going to help. "If I'm gonna do this, I'll need a lift."

Steve grins, picks up the phone and dials, handing it over as it rings. She throws him a confused look but takes it anyway. They always go along with each other's gimmicks.

Robin grins too when the line connects and they both hear, "Wheeler residence, Nancy speaking?"

----------

"Explain why I'm driving you to Eddie's again?"

Despite the fact that they'd only called her half an hour before their shift ended, Nancy pulls into the parking lot looking put together and ready for anything.

Robin turns up the radio and taps her fingers to the beat on her knee as they head off, she's restless. "I can't really explain right now, it's uh..."

"Because usually Steve would drive you," Nancy interrupts, gesturing with one hand and driving with the other. "You got off work at the same time, he was just starting his car back there."

She's too smart, this girl. Robin pivots.

"Fine! Fine, if you really need to know, I wanted to buy some weed."

Nancy looks at her pointedly, she's not buying it. Robin holds her gaze with a look of her own, but Nancy has to look away as they pass through an intersection.

"You know I know you're lying, Robin."

Dammit! Why does she have to be so... unnerving? She gives in, but she's determined not to give up.

"I know, I know, I just can't tell you the truth."

"Is it a code red?" Nancy's eyes are so bright when she's asking questions.

God, how sad is it that that's always the first question. That it has to be. "No, it's not that, it's just private."

"Oh." Nancy pauses, thinks.

Robin tries to think up a way to throw her off but runs out of time before Nancy opens up a new line of investigation.

"It's not your secret to tell?" Nancy guesses.

How does she do that?

Robin's reaction gives her away, so she gives in. "Yeah."

"But it's important?"

"Very. Just, please don't ask me anything else."

"Ok. Thanks for being honest with me." And Nancy beams at her.

It's confusing.

People don't usually say things like "thanks for being honest" after you just straight up lied to their faces and then told them you couldn't tell them the truth. At least, not sincerely. But Nancy somehow waded through all of Robin's awkwardness and saw things for what they were.

Saw her and thanked her. Saw her and beamed.

Fuck. As if she doesn't have enough heartache after the last time she tried to screw up the courage to talk to Vickie and ended up crying in the bathroom again, now Nancy is beaming at her.

Robin looks out the window the rest of the way there. She starts feeling very aware of her hands. She tries to sit still and be patient, and fails miserably.

Eddie's van is there when they pull in, meaning Eddie is likely there. A good start, but Robin doesn't have much of a plan going beyond 'go talk to Eddie.'

Nancy picks up on her hesitation. "So," she starts, drawing out the word. "You're going to talk to Eddie?" Freakin' mind reader.

Robin takes a deep breath, reminding herself to tread carefully. Nancy could easily piece some things together if she doesn't watch what she says. "Yeah, I need to talk to him."

"About something important." Nancy squints at her slightly, trying to get a read on the situation still.

"Yup."

"Something Steve couldn't be here for, because otherwise he'd be driving you?"

Damn. "I can neither confirm nor deny, Wheeler."

"Do you want me to come?"

She tears her gaze up from her lap to look at Nancy. "No! Nope, you can't come-"

"Ok, that's fine! I can wait outside." Nancy smiles at her, not pushing the issue. It seems sincere, like Nancy trusts her to have a secret and not pry. It's a lot, from someone like her who digs into mysteries like it's her goddamn job.

And then Nancy digs in. "But before you go, just so you know what I have to offer... I know Steve. We've definitely had our ups and downs, but if it's about him I might be able to offer some insight that you wouldn't otherwise have access to."

Robin thinks. Nancy smiles, sweetly. Robin hates the feeling of being reeled in, but she has to admit it's a good point.

"Actually, that might come in handy," she relents.

Nancy smiles with the corner of her mouth. It's the kind of satisfied smile that says 'I got it right,' and it makes Robin want to let her always be right. No time for that kind of thinking, though, Steve needs her. Not to mention Nancy is like a thousand percent off limits.

Robin pauses one last time before they get out of the car. "You can come with me, but Eddie has to be ok with it, too."

Nancy nods sharply, gets out of the car and starts knocking on the trailer door, all business. Robin scrambles to catch up.

The door opens a crack and Eddie looks out through it. He looks awful, like he didn't sleep. He looks at Robin, and his eyes narrow. He looks at Nancy, who smiles brightly like sunshine at him. He squints.

"Eddie, I really recommend letting us come in so you can fill me in on what the hell is going on here, and so we can decode whatever ridiculous thing Steve's done." Apart from being whip smart, Nancy is also persuasive.

He looks puzzled, raises an eyebrow at Robin.

"I uh, I know some of it," Robin confesses in answer to his unspoken question.

He sighs, resigned, and abandons them at the open door to collapse onto his couch before lighting up a cigarette.

Robin follows, hating the cigarette, but sits next to him anyways. It's important.

Nancy closes the door and locks it, puts her purse down on the coffee table, and sits properly in Wayne's chair, crossing one ankle under the other.

Eddie looks at Robin. "Tell me what he said." His voice sounds tired, wrung out, crackly.

She looks at Nancy, then back at him. "Uh..."

He throws his hands up, accepting his fate. "It's not like she's going to leave."

Nancy is so gorgeous when she's pleased with herself. Dammit.

"He told me you guys were hanging out last night, smoking up and watching movies, and then you kissed."

A gasp from the direction of Wayne's chair. Robin will lose her nerve if she stops talking though, so she continues.

"And then he said you looked scared, so he tried to make it better, but instead he made it worse, and then he left. He thinks you're really mad at him, but I'm guessing that's not it."

"Oh Steve, you didn't..." says the chair. Robin ignores it.

Eddie takes a long drag. Robin waits, it feels itchy but she has to be patient. She tries to look calm as the orange glow eats away at the paper and tobacco, getting closer and closer to Eddie's lips.

"And this brings you here, why?" He looks her straight in the eye this time. His affect is so flat, almost like Steve after he's finished panicking and ends up just exhausted. But there's the sharpest little edge to it.

"He wanted me to check if you were ok, but that's not why I'm here."

"We're here as your friends right now, Eddie," says Nancy, the same way she thanked Robin earlier. Earnestly. "Once you go through hell with us, you're stuck with us, and we want to be here for you." It's almost enough for Eddie to relax, almost. Time to bring out the big guns.

Robin takes a deep breath, pushes all thoughts of earnest, proper, sunshiney chair away until she can do the hard thing that Eddie needs her to do. So she can be responsible for one of hers, and damn the consequences if chair doesn't like it.

"Eddie, you know I'm gay right?"

Two pairs of eyes lock onto Robin's face.

"You, too?" and "you are?" happen simultaneously.

Robin concentrates hard, eyes locked with Eddie's.

"Mhmm, and there's a girl I like but she's probably straight and I think if I'd kissed her last night and it went like that I'd need to talk to a gay person right now. So here I am." She takes a big breath to steady herself. "And, well," she points a thumb at Nancy, "she has a car and isn't Steve, so."

Nancy snorts. Robin can't not look at her anymore. Nancy looks weirdly fine about all of this, like none of it bothers her. Like she's happy to be here, talking to likely the only two queers in Hawkins, Indiana about their sad love lives.

"While I do have a car, I also have a lot of experience dealing with the chaos that is Steve Harrington. Maybe I can help?"

Eddie relaxes a bit, stubs out the cigarette finally. "He said uh, he said it's ok because nothing happened."

Nancy covers her face with a hand and shakes her head, "Oh Steve, no..."

"Yeah, he said it like... Like we could just take the fact that I kissed Steve Fucking Harrington, and just sweep it under the rug!" Eddie catches himself getting swept up in the emotions and gets quiet again. "Like he was trying to make it so it never happened and..."

"And then it hurt?" Nancy supplies helpfully.

"Yeah."

They sit in the quiet, letting things sink in.

Nancy speaks first, hesitantly. "But Eddie, he didn't pretend it didn't happen."

Robin catches on. "Oh fuck, Nance is right. He came and told me right away, and he wasn't worried about it Eddie, just about you."

Eddie thinks it over. "Shit, I really thought I lost him, I was so angry at myself for that. You think maybe he- Wait isn't he straight though?"

"I don't know, I thought he was." She looks at Robin.

"I thought he was, too. I think he thought he was." They both look at Eddie.

"He may have uh," he winces slightly at Nancy. "He may have moaned when I kissed him?"

"Eddie!" twice. Robin throws a pillow at him.

Nancy laughs, she laughs really hard. She catches her breath and smiles. "Oh God, you're actually perfect for each other-"

Eddie throws the pillow at Nancy. "You don't seem weird about this, Wheeler."

"That's 'cause I'm not!" She grins.

"He's your ex!"

"I know!" Nancy dissolves into laughter again, and seeing the crinkle around her eyes Robin knows that it's good laughter, that Nancy gets it, and that Robin won't have to worry about anything she's said. A tension in her chest melts and she laughs too. Eddie joins in, his voice crackly from smoke and lack of sleep. It feels good to laugh this hard after being so open.

"So what are you gonna do?" Nancy finally asks. So organized.

Eddie grins dramatically and shrugs. "I guess I'm gonna have to tell Steve Harrington that he likes me." And it's so stupid, and they're so free in this moment, that this time they laugh until they cry.

----------

Steve's phone rings and he nearly wipes out running to pick it up, socks slipping on the hardwood.

"Robs?" He wished his voice didn't sound so broken.

"How'd you know?"

"Robin!"

"He's fine Steve! It's ok!"

"Fuck, ok. Ok." He pinches the bridge of his nose, it's a small relief.

"Steve, I'm coming over."

"Ok."

She hangs up.

They don't need to use extra words with each other. Steve likes that about her. She did sound a little hesitant though, like she has bad news. He bangs his head against the wall, softly.

----------

They sit on his couch, Steve with his legs crossed, Robin hugging her knees in front of her. They face each other, instead of the always-on-for-background-noise tv, or anything unimportant like that. He waits for her to start, he's got nothing new.

She's tense, her nostrils flaring as she exhales. "There's so much I want to tell you, but I'm his friend, too. I can't just say what I want to."

"I know, and I know I fucked up with him. Help me fix it." He's not surprised that he means it, but the words feel so alien running over his tongue. It's like they fall out of his mouth automatically, without going through the filter of his brain.

She thinks. He waits.

"Ok Steve, listen. Let's say I started becoming friends with Vickie, started hanging out with her, and even though I have feelings, I'm holding back because she doesn't even know I'm gay, and I'm pretty sure she's straight. And then one day I slip up, and I can't take it back."

"You think he has feelings for me?" Did Eddie tell her? He wants to ask.

Robin snaps her fingers at him, "focus!"

He nods. "Okay, okay. You're scared that if you slip up, and she doesn't think of you like that, she might think of you different, or tell people. Pariah, right?"

Robin fiddles with the frayed edges around the hole in her jeans. "Yeah. So uh, what if I did slip up, and then it kind of went bad?"

Steve thinks. Robin waits.

"Yeah, I get that but..."

"But what?"

His voice comes out so small. "But, it wasn't bad."

It feels impossible, but it's true. Even if it does feel like walking off a cliff to admit.

"So what was it?" Her head tilts.

"It was-" He searches for the right words, but doesn't find them. He stops thinking and feels instead, and the words come. "It was perfect?" He whispers, like the words he's found are very delicate. Like he might break them by speaking them aloud.

Robin leans her curled up body sideways into the back of the couch, a small smile creeping over her face. "Ok," she whispers back, just loud enough to hear over the tv running softly at the edge of their little bubble. "Do you want to talk about that or keep going?"

He shakes his head, smiles shyly. "No, I- I want to keep that for myself for now. That part's nice. That's not the part I'm worried about. Let's keep going."

She leans forward to look him in the eye. "That's totally ok- for now- but I am gonna take a mental note Stevie, 'cause I know you. And you're absolutely gonna want to make this a big deal later. After we fix everything."

She smirks. He smirks back.

"So, did you figure out where it went wrong?" She asks.

He grimaces. "I honestly haven't thought about anything else all day, and I have no idea."

"Yeah, you were no help at work," she kicks him softly. "Shit. You should really be talking to him about this, but... Because you're both idiots I'm gonna help you, one time only." She waits for him to nod, he does. "You said it was ok because 'nothing happened.'"

"Ah fuck, I did." He covers his face in his hands. That could have sounded bad. "I didn't mean it though, not like that anyways. He was looking at me with his face all- I must have trailed off."

"What were you gonna say?"

"I don't know! Nothing happened that would make me mad at you? That you need to be afraid of me for?" He notices that he's getting a bit worked up, and rubs his eyes. "Nothing happened that I didn't want, maybe. I dunno."

"So he didn't hear the end?'

"Yep, and then he made me leave, but I think it was so that he could cry."

"Ugh, that's brutal." Robin hugs her legs harder. "Steve, you better pray for me if I ever earn the love of a beautiful woman. You and I are definitely the same kind of moron some days. So are you gonna..."

"Apologize, I think. For scaring him. Not something I wanna do anymore, you know?"

"And?"

"Ask if we can do it again? Maybe like, longer this time?" They grin at each other.

"Oh! There's something else I need to warn you about. I uh, had to make an executive decision." She feels her face screw up in anticipation of his reaction.

"Robs, you're killing me, what?"

"Nancy knows everything. She wanted to help and Eddie said it was ok, but she was really cool about it!" Her words come out quickly, like if she can get them out fast enough she'll be forgiven for the breach of trust.

Steve takes a deep breath of relief and smiles at her. "That's all? I can deal with that. It actually might smooth things over for me with Nancy. We're trying to be better friends."

"Her idea?"

"Mm."

"Knew it. Sounds like something she'd say."

Steve makes her dinner, they talk about other things, they don't talk about anything, and they let things settle in the comfort of each other's presence.

They don't talk about it again until Robin is about to head home.

"Hey, Steve?" Her voice is soft, hesitant again.

"Yeah Robs?"

She teeters on the verge of saying it for a moment, rocking on her heels. He waits. "You do like him right?"

"What do you mean?" Wasn't it obvious?

"It's not like, just to see what it's like? Or try it out on him- guys that is?"

He considers, matching the care for choosing words she brought this up with. "I think I already liked him. And now- Now I like him, but with kissing."

She considers, then shrugs. Then gets a wicked look as she opens the door to go. "Nancy's right, you and Eddie are perfect for each other." She runs out, leaving Steve both more and less confused than before.

----------

Steve calls Eddie. It only takes him ten minutes after Robin leaves to work up the courage. God he loves that woman, would be lost without her.

Eddie picks up. "Surfer Boy Pizza, we recommend the juicy pineapple?"

Steve smiles to himself at the improvisational greeting, tries to let that smile into his words. "Hey, it's me."

"Hey." Eddie sounds cautious, but not defensive. It's a start.

"Hey. Uh, I wanted to come over, so I can apologize. Is that ok?"

Eddie doesn't say anything right away. Steve tries to be patient like he is with Robin while his stomach flips.

"Depends, I guess." He can hear Eddie's shrug over the phone.

"On?"

"On what you're apologizing for."

"Oh. Do you want me to tell you now?"

"Like the whole thing?"

"Wait, there's a whole thing?"

Eddie nearly laughs at that and Steve lets out a frustrated growl, "I'm not great with words, clearly."

There's a pause before Eddie sighs. "Just get over here, Steve."

----------

Steve gets the fuck over there.

He doesn't even put music on for the drive over, doesn't need it to occupy his mind while he drives. His mind is fully occupied with what he's going to say, on hoping he'll say things right, even hoping they'll get to kiss again, and isn't that a trip. He's not nervous though. It feels almost like he's nervous, but instead of the usual tension it's a good kind of feeling. It's weird, but it's good.

Eddie is waiting for him outside. The not-nervousness fades into regular nervousness as he walks up.

"Eddie..."

"Steve." He's got one arm crossed over his body as the other holds a smoke.

"I'm sorry I said that nothing happened. It wasn't the whole..." He trails off again, before shaking his head out. This is how he got into this mess. "It was bullshit. I'm trying not to do things that are bullshit anymore."

Eddie's watching him appraisingly. He seems more himself compared to when he left last night, a good sign, but he hasn't let Steve off the hook yet. "So if not nothing happened, then what happened, Steve?"

Ah, Steve knows this game. There are many ways to play, but only one way to cut through the bullshit. "We kissed, and I liked it." It feels like his stomach drops out of him to say it, but he forces himself to watch Eddie's reaction. He seems to be getting flustered, maybe starting to flush, though it's hard to tell in the evening light.

He forges on, quiet but steady. "I want to kiss you more, like a lot more, Eddie. Because I didn't really realize it before, but I think I like you."

Eddie smiles at him, too wide. "I think you like me too, Stevie."

It takes Steve a second, switching gears.

"Oh fuck off, Munson!"

Eddie's head tips back as he laughs, a tension broken. "Get inside so we can 'kiss more,' Harrington." He opens the trailer door and holds it for Steve to come in.

Steve doesn't need to be told twice.

----------

The trailer is mostly dark as Steve walks in, the only light on is down the hall in Eddie's room and it's casting more shadows than light. Talking to Eddie outside was one thing, but suddenly in the privacy of Eddie's home it feels like anything could happen, and for the first time in a while Steve doesn't know what that means exactly. He just knows he doesn't want to screw it up.

Eddie follows him in and unwraps Steve's arms from where he's holding himself around the waist, when they'd gotten there Steve doesn't know. Eddie takes his hands and looks in his eyes though, and it doesn't really matter.

"I'm sorry too, Steve. I freaked out." His eyes look huge and glassy in the low light.

Oh. He wasn't expecting this. "It's ok-"

"No, it's not, is it? I made you worried." Eddie's arms curl around him.

It's a lot all at once. The feeling of his hands pulling him in on his low back, his head bumping into Eddie's neck and hair as they hold each other. But inside, it doesn't feel right that Eddie should apologize for that when it's his fault. Steve worries about everyone, all the time. That was just what he does, right? The kids are always teasing him about it. He doesn't need to be comforted for something he does all the time, but he can't bring himself to move away either. It feels like his edges are fraying.

He doubles down. "But I made you hurt." He hates how his voice cracks.

"I'm better now." Eddie rubs his back, and he can't help but relax into it.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

It's a relief, but something still eats away at Steve. He thinks back to what Robin had said, about Vickie. "I don't think I could have hurt you unless... Unless you-"

"Unless I liked you?

"Yeah."

"I do, Steve."

Steve lifts his head up from Eddie's shoulder to look up into his eyes. "Oh really? 'Cause I think if someone liked me, they'd probably want to shove me up against a wall and make out with me."

Eddie's eyes crease happily as he gazes back. "All in good time, Stevie. Be patient."

Eddie slides a hand up to cradle Steve's head with soft fingers along his jaw. They catch each other's eyes and get stuck there, riding the feeling of almost, breath mingling in the space that grows smaller until their lips touch for the second time.

The simple press of the night before echoes between them, but this time neither draws apart, and Steve relaxes as his eyelids fall heavy shut. Eddie's tongue sweeps over his lips, and he opens to the invitation. He lets Eddie lead, melts into it, doesn't want to scare him again.

Worrying slips away with conscious thought as he loses himself in feeling, the feeling of Eddie's arms wrapped around him drawing him nearer, holding him firmly, and he feels safe again wrapped in those arms. Maybe safe to fall apart. He hopes so, because it feels like those frayed edges are unraveling, being kissed so sweetly, held so lovely.

Eddie tastes real against his tongue like smoke, it's wet and warm, and he wants to taste more. He smiles into their kiss and it breaks Eddie away, giving him the chance to nose Eddie's ticklish hair away from his face and lick messy over his cheek to his neck. He drops kisses over the delicate skin there like each one is an adornment on this beautiful man who wants to kiss him more.

"Hey," the beautiful man says, softly, pulling Steve back to him, not quite back down to earth but part way.

"What is it?" He mumbles through the haze.

Eddie sways them lightly in a dance that doesn't need to go anywhere. Takes his time answering, lets the moment stretch out so they can feel it. Presses a kiss into Steve's temple.

"You want to lie down?"

Steve nods, sighs a hum of assent. He feels floaty, can't quite believe this is happening still. He doesn't love the thought of not touching Eddie right now though, what if it breaks this thing? He can't let it end yet. He hooks his fingers through Eddie's and lets himself be pulled towards the lamplight, into his room.

Eddie drops Steve onto his bed, lets go to take his shirt off but doesn't come back to Steve's touch right away. Just looks at him. Steve feels Eddie's gaze spread hot over his body, wants to give Eddie more to look at, and takes his own shirt off. He takes it off in the slutty way he'd perfected years ago, back arching and strong arms stretching into long lines. A tiny fissure of reality spills through at the sleek motion, the muscle memory rippling into conscious memories of the past. It stings to feel the contrast, that it had been so empty in previous performances.

But he's never done it for a boy before, and he's happy he did, the way Eddie's eyes meet him hungry this time.

"And here I was thinking you were all sugar, no spice, Harrington."

Steve smirks but he can't stop a small huff escaping. "Call me something else, Eddie."

"Oh? What do you want to be called, pretty boy?"

The warmth Eddie's eyes rouse on his skin burns to hear the pet name, and he wants more. He shrugs, unused to asking for things like this. "Nice things."

Eddie straddles him, runs a hand through Steve's hair. His voice comes out feather soft and crackling deep. "Alright, sweetheart. I can be nice to you." He leaves a kiss on the crown of Steve's head that runs a shiver down his spine before lowering them down to lay back against his mismatched pillows, and they spend hours learning each other's bodies.

----------

What a difference twenty-four hours makes, Steve thinks to himself as he walks through the misty morning chill again to the Beemer. He'd left Eddie warm in bed with a promise, sealed with a kiss, that neither was going to freak out this time.

He drives home to shower, grieving the loss of Eddie's scent on his skin as his soap and the spray of warm water washes it down the drain. Only the knowledge that he'll get it back soon makes it bearable. No need for autopilot today, instead he savours the way washing reminds him of Eddie's hands on his body.

They had done things a little differently than Steve was used to. He used to take girls home to his empty house knowing what they wanted, knowing he could make them happy, and how to do that. But with Eddie they had gone slow, and Eddie had been so thoughtful and sweet to him. They had kissed and touched and grinded, but Eddie never made him feel used. If anything Eddie had made him feel precious, like he was worth taking the time to explore.

Skin towelled dry, teeth brushed fresh, and hair tamed just so means he's just about ready to tackle the day. He chooses a soft tee that just about covers the hickeys, pulls on perfectly worn-in jeans, and leaves to pick up Robin.

He grins as she tries the car door's handle before he can lean over to unlock it. She does it every time. He grins as she swings down into the passenger seat. His face is going to hurt from all the grinning, and he doesn't care.

She's always a whirlwind. It takes her a moment to settle in so he waits, always patient for her, and now for Eddie too. She finally looks over after twisting the radio dials, her knee bouncing absentmindedly.

"You look like the cat that caught- Wait, already!?"

He grins harder. Never let it be said that Robin Buckley isn't whip smart.

She shakes her head. "Fuck me, you don't waste any time."

"Never did, Robs."

"Steve Harrington kissed a boy." She shakes her head in a teasing mockery of disbelief.

"A pretty one," he supplies, as he shifts into drive and lets his foot off the break.

"If you say so," she teases, and he punches her shoulder lightly.

"A very pretty one." He corrects, teasing her right back.

"So, what does it mean?"

He shrugs. "Dunno. I mean, I definitely like him. He likes me too," he adds conspiratorially.

"Yeah, I can tell." She throws a pointed look at his neck where he knows a hint of purple is peeking out past his tee. He rolls his eyes at her, but she barges on.

"We should celebrate tonight! Steve's Something But It Isn't Straight Party."

"Can you even have a party with two people?"

She laughs. "You don't want him there?"

"Obviously I want him there. It would be awkward for you, though."

"True. Hey, Nance knows, and she seems really cool about it. The four of us?"

"Sure, my place."

They call to set things up once they reach Family Video, before swinging the door sign to open. The day doesn't feel so long when he knows there's Eddie at the end of it.

----------

Steve rounds the corner into Forest Hills, feeling the familiar tug in his gut as he drives past an area "closed for construction," still left over from the events of last spring. It can't dampen his mood today though as he parks next to Eddie's van.

He's excited to catch a few moments alone with Eddie before meeting Robin and Nancy back at his place. He isn't sure why Robin had been so insistent on having Nancy pick her up rather than having Eddie and Nancy meet them at his place, but who was he to argue if he could get a little bit of alone time with Eddie in first?

He doesn't see Eddie waiting, so he heads inside. Frantic searching noises tumble out of the bedroom, and a shirt flies past the doorway.

"Hey, I'm here," Steve calls as he walks down the hall.

Eddie leans into view from where he was going through the mess on his floor. "Hey! I'm almost ready, I just have to find my shirt."

"You sure? You look pretty good without one." He pulls Eddie off the floor into a kiss hello.

"Have you seen what a shirtless, strapping young man does to the moms in this town, Steve?" Eddie grabs his arms and shakes him, making Steve smile. "We'd never make it through the liquor store alive!"

"Just a few more minutes for me then?" Flirting is familiar territory, now that he's gotten 'round to the idea that he can flirt with Eddie.

And Eddie can keep up with him, quip for quip. "Alright pretty boy, a few more minutes, just for you."

This time when Eddie kisses him, it's like he's hungry to get as much of Steve as he can before they leave. He wraps himself around Steve, pressing his bare chest into Steve's sweater. Hands tangle in hair and moans drop from their lips to join the mess of clothes on Eddie's floor. He sucks Steve's lips between his own while pulling the hair at the nape of Steve's neck, catching him between the two points of tension. His other hand wanders down to duck under Steve's sweater, fingers spread as if to feel as much of his skin as he can before wrapping around to drag blunt fingernails down his back.

Steve feels like he might melt into a puddle if Eddie lets him go, but Eddie pulls back and rests his forehead against Steve's, panting lightly.

"As much as I want to keep going..." Eddie speaks softly, looking at him sweetly, as if he didn't just rile Steve up while simultaneously turning his brain into goo. How was he so capable of speech right now?

"Unh?" Is about the best Steve can manage.

It makes Eddie's eyes crinkle at the corners, his lips twitch at a smirk. "Mmm indeed, but we've got a little soirée to get you to. It's probably not a bad idea to keep taking it slow, anyways."

Eddie sits him down on his bed while he continues looking for his shirt. Steve takes the opportunity to adjust himself while Eddie's looking through his drawers. It takes him a minute to understand what Eddie's said.

"You want to take things slow?" It's like a punch to the gut. Eddie is the center of his universe right now, he's all Steve thought about today, and Steve wants him with a greed and hunger he doesn't know if he's ever allowed himself before. Doesn't Eddie feel the same?

"Aha!" Eddie turns around, triumphantly holding up a handful of light purple fabric. "My gay shirt! You won't get that yet, it's ok, I'll explain later. Let it not be said that I don't own colour in my wardrobe, Steve Harrington."

He pulls the shirt over his head, it barely reaches his waist. Steve's knee bounces, it's hard to worry when Eddie looks so edible. Somehow he still manages. "Women's small, my ass. Perfect fit. Anyways, where were we?"

"Taking things slow." He holds an even tone, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

"Right. What do you think? I mean, you just figured out that you like guys, and me in particular, and had your first gay kiss, and second, and a few after that... And that was all pretty much within the last twenty four hours. It must be a little overwhelming." Eddie sits down next to him, resting a hand on his knee. "I mean, you need time to get your bearings, and for us to figure a few things out, right?"

Steve feels a little of the weight lift, hearing the word 'us.'

"What if I don't want to take things slow? I mean, I like what we've done so far. I don't want to stop, Eds. I want more."

Eddie grins, leans back on his hands. "Alright, big boy. How do you wanna handle Robin and Nancy tonight?"

"What do you mean, handle?"

"Well, can I kiss you in front of them, for example?" Eddie has one of his dungeon master expressions on, Steve's seen him use it around the kids when they were trying to get away with a crazy plan. Only, it had never been quite like this.

Steve shrugs, feeling almost shy under Eddie's confident gaze. "They already know, I don't see why not."

"OK, and what about Jonathan and Argyle, or the kids, or Joyce and Hop even. Mrs. Henderson?"

"Uhh..."

"I would suggest we keep things low key in public. Not just because we haven't talked about what we might be to each other yet, but simply because Hawkins isn't exactly known for being kind to anyone who's different."

"Eddie?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"I know that people are assholes, man, I was one of them. You're saying we need to be careful and I'm not used to that, right?"

Eddie purses his lips, thinks for a second. "Yep, that's a big part of it."

It's nice actually, that Eddie wants to warn him that he'll have to learn how to be safe with this. That he's looking out for both of them. But there's something he'd forgotten to account for.

Steve smirks right back at him. "I think I see your point, Eds. Taking things slow sounds good in theory, but it wouldn't exactly be my first time keeping a big secret from the town."

"Touché, Steve."

"I'll do it anyway if you want, under one condition." He smiles and swings around to straddle Eddie's lap, hooking his arms around Eddie's shoulders. Eddie cocks an eyebrow in question. "When we're alone, I get as much of you as I want."

Eddie tips his head back in laughter before pressing a kiss into Steve's lips. "Oh you're going to be trouble, aren't you?"

Steve doesn't reply but bats his eyelashes.

"There's something else, Steve."

Steve tilts his head. He's enjoying sitting in Eddie's lap, seeing all of his reactions up close and feeling Eddie's hands are stroking up and down along his spine. He could see why girls used to want to sit on his lap. There's a certain kind of power in knowing you're wanted and acting cute about it. And then like this, it could be intimate, too.

"It's not just learning how to avoid assholes, or keeping things low key until we want to call this something." He brushes a lock of hair behind Steve's ear. "It's um..."

"What is it?"

"Uh, the way we touch. Or kiss. It feels like it could easily be a lot more than a crush, Steve. I mean, maybe that's just me, and I'm gonna make an ass of myself here, but..."

"No! I- I know what you mean." Steve feels his cheeks flush.

Eddie looks away, but he continues. "It can be really easy to get swept up in things the first time you fuck around with a guy. Like, getting carried away in the rush and, maybe saying things or doing things you might not be ready for because it's new and it's the thing you want even if people say you're not supposed to, like it's a pretty big thing right? It just feels like this is such a dream and I don't want to wake up, but if you do... I want it to be a good dream you had."

Steve draws Eddie into him and presses a kiss to his hair. He wonders if this is coming from past experience. And if it is about Eddie's past, which side of it had Eddie been on? Either had to hurt, though. He squeezes Eddie tightly and they stay like that for a bit, before Steve leans back enough to look Eddie in the eye.

"Eddie, we know each other. We're not going to hurt each other on purpose. But if we do anyways? I mean that's kind of life, right? What are we going to do, hold back? Try not to feel anything even if we do?" Steve swallows down any hesitation. "I don't want anyone else, I don't want to go around experimenting with random guys, I don't care about any of the girls who come into Family Video and try to slip me their number. I just want this. I just want you."

"Well fuck, Steve." Eddie shakes his head, as if in awe. "I guess you've got yourself a deal."

"Seal it with a kiss?"

----------

Eddie drives them to the liquor store to pick up beers, and a bottle of white for the girls. He feels like he's vibrating, knowing that Steve feels the same things he does. Maybe he hasn't had a lot of experience, but he thinks he can probably make it good for Steve. He wants to make it so good for him.

It's good that he's driving, good for him, takes focus so that he doesn't run away with these thoughts, with these feelings. But perhaps it's not the best thing for driving. Driving under the influence of love, would that count as a crime? Probably only if it makes him crash. He focuses. Steve rests his hand on Eddie's thigh, not in a dirty way, it's just there. It's grounding. Luckily the van sits higher than most of the traffic in town, they're not likely to be spotted.

They manage to make it through their shopping trip without catching the attention of the moms of Hawkins. It's funny how they both attract so much attention usually, though in very different ways. The married women of Hawkins seem united in their beliefs that Steve is a good boy and Eddie is a bad influence.

He laughs under his breath at the check out. If the moms of Hawkins only knew in what particular way those things were true, they'd have a scandal to gossip about for months. Steve gives him a curious look and he shakes his head. Eddie throws down some cash, there's no way Steve's paying for anything for his own party.

The pizza joint, blessedly untouched by the "earthquakes," how ridiculous that they all have to use this coded language and no one really knows, was basically the only restaurant left open in town. Pretty heroic really, that they keep going. Eddie amuses himself while they wait for their order thinking about how sometimes, when life is ugly, just pretending things are normal is the best way to keep going. That's what it feels like here, under the fluorescent glow of the menu.

He watches Steve as they wait, and Steve watches him. It's too busy for them to touch, business is good when you're the only place in town. So they look at eachother. Notice all the little pieces of the other that add up into a whole person. Steve watches him play with the tears in his jeans. Eddie watches Steve's fingers tap on the table. They share little smiles and secret looks, looks that mean something and nothing, really. Just happy to be near each other.

Finally they make it back to Steve's house, to safety and a measure of privacy. Steve wrangles the door of the van open holding the pizzas one hand like a waiter, Eddie brings the drinks in. They hear familiar voices walking up to the door, it's open when Steve tries it.

Inside it's clear that the girls have been busy. There are streamers hung up, some of them artfully placed, twisted into festive curls and hanging at key points that define the space. Others are tangles of colour and joy, festooned haphazardly so Steve and Eddie have to duck around them.

Robin runs in with tape sticking to her fingers, a makeshift scarf of streamers draped around her shoulders, and gives Steve zero chance to react before she's wrapped around him and squeezing him tight, mindless of the pizzas. Eddie hears her quietly ask Steve if he likes it, sees Steve nod and whisper back something that makes Robin grin and squeeze him tighter, and he's glad that Steve has someone else in his life who loves him so dearly. It would make it harder for Steve to let any kind of romantic relationship subsume him.

His train of thoughts crashes as Nancy leans in and grabs the drinks from his hands, and says under her breath, "whipped already, huh?"

Her eyes are playful, so Eddie follows her to the kitchen as she puts the beers in the fridge. He plays coy, hiding behind his hair and smiling at her like he's been caught. As if that wasn't exactly what happened.

"Maybe," he stage whispers back, "but don't you go telling him."

Nancy shushes him but beckons him closer. "I got him something that he's going to hate, you'll love it." She sorts through the party supply bags strewn across the counter before pulling out a little plastic tiara, the kind little girls get to wear on their birthdays. She holds it out to him grinning, like she's proud of having thought of it.

"Ahhh, well done Wheeler." He pushes the gaudy, sparkly thing back into her hands. "It should be yours to give. He'll know you're ok with everything if it comes from you."

Nancy hides it behind her back as Steve, with Robin attached, comes in to drop the pizza boxes down.

Steve sees Eddie's face and immediately has him pinned. "Oh no. Robin, they're talking about me. They know too much! We've got to separate them."

Robin nods sagely, and pries Nancy away from Eddie, always one-upping the joke. Eddie thinks she'd be a great DnD player if she ever tried her hand at it. "Mm, it's dangerous isn't it, your ex and your..."

Steve clears his throat, a flush working up his face. "Exactly! Dangerous!" Steve's embarrassment is like candy, Eddie wants more.

"Do it, Wheeler," he nods to Nancy.

Nancy smiles and walks up to Steve. Robin catches on once she sees what's behind Nancy's back and leans back into the counter, watching.

"You know they used to call you King, back when we were dating. But that wasn't exactly right was it?" Eddie can't see Nancy's face, but he sees Steve's reactions to it, looking curiously back at Nancy, wondering what she's doing, but trusting.

Nancy pulls the tiara out from behind her back and places it on Steve's head, tucking it into his hair. It's too quick for Steve to really see and he runs over to the hall mirror to take a look at what she's done. Steve stills when he catches sight of the silver and pink adorning his beloved hair, his face falls and the girls hesitate.

But Eddie knows what to do. "What do you think, princess?"

Steve freezes, the rush of blood to his face worsening, and he looks over at Eddie with wide eyes, until Eddie winks back at him. It breaks the moment and Steve laughs like he can't quite believe this day.

He looks back at his reflection and takes it all in before running back to Nancy to try to put the tiara on her head. But as much as Steve protests they don't let him take it off, insisting that it's his special day.

Eventually Steve makes peace with his princess crown, and won't even let Eddie have a turn with it. Robin teases Steve over not wanting to let the crown go now that he's gotten used to it. Eddie doesn't think Steve has a lot in his life that's just for him, so he's glad they're doing this, as silly as it is.

They raise their glasses over greasy slices of Hawaiian, the new town obsession since Argyle decided to stay and revolutionize fine dining.

"Happy Gay Day to Steve!" Robin suggests as a toast.

Steve looks skeptical. "It's not exactly right, but it's not exactly wrong either." He thinks, doesn't come up with anything better, and shrugs. "Fuck it, happy gay day to me."

Robin grabs Steve's arm before he can complete the toast. "I'm really proud of you, dude." It's quiet the way she says it, meaningful. Eddie loves her for loving him. He sees Nancy looking fondly at Robin too. It's rare for Robin to act so sincere, so direct.

They clink glasses and drink well.

"But if we're drinking to me," Steve says, "I'm drinking to you guys too." He refills his glass, looking pensive.

He holds it up to Robin. "To my soulmate, who never lets me take myself too seriously." And then to Nancy, "and my first love, who never lets me get away with bullshit," she tenses up, but he smiles at her and it soothes something between them. Ah, maybe that's where that had come from yesterday.

Steve turns his glass to Eddie. "And to my future boyfriend, I hope, who says my kisses feel like love."

Nancy's eyebrows shoot up, Robin freezes, and Eddie's a little startled himself.

"Steve!" The name leaves his throat too high pitched, nearly a squeak. "I'm not drinking beer to that!" And he gets up and sweeps Steve into his arms, murmuring "cheers" right before stealing a kiss.

Robin covers her eyes and boos at them teasingly, while Nancy tips her glass towards them and drinks, watching the whole thing as far as Eddie can tell, because he closes his eyes to sink into the moment.

A bit of crust hits the side of Eddie's head and lodges itself in his hair, and he breaks away from Steve to look at Robin, who's ready to launch another. "Prude," he teases back.

Steve clears his throat before they start an all out food fight, bringing their attention back. "I'm serious though. You guys really get it, like not just that we went through hell together and we don't have to pretend about what that was. I don't have to pretend anything with you. I don't have to pretend to be someone I'm not, so I can just be. And it feels fucking awesome."

Eddie's heart swells to hear Steve's speech and he's sure from their faces that the girls feel the same. It's such a big feeling.

He takes the crust out of his hair and throws it at Steve.

----------

Robin yells over her shoulder at the boys as the new couple heads out the sliding doors to Steve's backyard "for a smoke."

"We know you're just going out there to make ou-" Nancy's hand covers her mouth and while the hand doesn't shut her up, the touch does. She meets Nancy's eyes and nips at her palm before Nancy pulls her hand away shaking it.

"Oh my god, Robin! You're as bad as Mike I swear!"

"Ew, please never compare me to your brother again."

"I won't if you stop acting like a teenage boy."

Robin sucks air between her teeth, giving Nancy a mock apologetic look. "Ooh, sorry Nance, but I just can't make that promise. I will, however, let you help me pick a movie."

Nancy had been asking Steve a lot of questions about how he knew he liked Eddie all of a sudden, and what it meant about him. Steve hadn't had a lot of answers, so Robin and Eddie had suggested watching a movie to take the pressure off him. Nancy seemed more invested than if it was just about Steve, it was making Robin have to work a bit harder to stomp down any feelings she was absolutely refusing to acknowledge. It's just Nancy's avid curiosity, and maybe if Robin tells herself that enough it will feel true.

She kneels down by the VHS collection and Nancy joins her, sitting gracefully like a mermaid on the plush beige carpet. Nancy's fingers trail over the movies as she mumbles bits of titles.

"You tipsy?"

Nancy smiles. "A little, I think. It's nice."

Robin hums happily back at her. "It is nice. Seeing you let loose a little."

Nancy snorts, "yeah 'cause I'm normally so uptight."

Robin's eyebrows shoot up. "I mean, you said it." She smiles a little to let Nancy know she doesn't mean to hurt.

Nancy doesn't seem bothered. "I dunno, like, I know how I can be, but it's kind of like Steve was saying. I'm just being me. It's just that people think me being me is ok 'cause I'm good at school and work and I'm responsible. But that's not all of me." Her eyes slide over to Robin's, waiting for a reply.

"I mean, I like who you are. It was kind of intimidating at first, but... It's pretty amazing that you always stand up for yourself, not to mention the rest of us. It takes a lot of strength, I think."

The words come too easily, having been part of the flock of thoughts that wouldn't stop spinning through Robin's head lately. It feels like a relief to let some of them out, it lets off some of the pressure.

"That's really nice of you to say..." Nancy trails off, looking back at the movies. She almost looks shy, and isn't that something. Robin feels her stomach drop knowing she has the ability to make Nancy Wheeler feel shy. Ah fuck, this wasn't going to be something she could ignore for much longer, was it?

It feels like a betrayal of her long standing feelings for Vickie. Sweet, pretty, slightly dorky Vickie, who wears straw hats and runs her mouth like Robin does when she's frazzled, who she stood next to in band for two years feeling flustered the whole time. Vickie whose pale freckled skin and delicate frame are always mostly hidden by baggy clothes that are both hideous and just right together, the way Robin likes. Vickie, who might be just a little too similar to her, a treacherous darkness in her whispers.

She shakes her head free of that train of thought, and focuses back in, following as Nancy trails a delicate finger over the titles one by one. She tries not to let her imagination run away with her at the thought of that finger trailing over her instead, reading her body instead of film titles.

"Robin?"

"Huh?"

Nancy smiles like she has a secret. "You know yesterday?"

"Uh, I've heard of it, yeah."

"You said you had a crush on someone? Someone straight?"

Oh no. Deflect! "Oh, uh yeah. She had a boyfriend." Wait-

"That doesn't always mean straight though." Nancy's smirking, alright play it cool.

"Well clearly, I mean look at Steve."

Nancy laughs, success! Until- "Maybe I don't have to look that far." And Nancy leans towards her, clearly angling for a kiss.

Robin pushes herself up like the ground is lava and runs across the room, jumping onto the couch. She points at Nancy. "What!?"

Nancy looks crushed. Oh no, ohhhh...

"Robin, I thought, I thought you meant-"

"It wasn't you it was- I mean, it wasn't, but then-"

"But I thought because you said someone you thought was straight because they had a boyfriend, past tense and-" Nancy cuts herself off this time, seems to debate something internally, but then looks up to meet Robin's eyes and continues.

"Well, I thought you'd heard that I broke up with Jonathan. So when I heard that yesterday I started thinking about it and, well I don't know how it works with women but you kind of act like you like me. Or, I thought you did, like the way you were all nervous in the car and... oh."

Nancy loses steam and the pout she ends off on is so ridiculously cute, Robin wants to eat it off of her perfect face.

Robin's voice comes out breathy as she asks, "what?"

"You must have been nervous about the situation as a whole, I guess. Not about me."

Robin doesn't know what to say. She circles back instead of addressing things head on.

"I didn't know that you and Jonathan broke up, I- Well, I didn't know so when you..."

Nancy shrugs, reminding Robin of Steve. She wonders how much of themselves they learned from each other.

"Yeah it kind of fizzled out I guess. Last week we, you know. Decided to end things while we could still be kind to each other about it." Nancy takes a deep breath. "Look, I'm sorry I tried to kiss you. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

Robin gets down from the couch and finds her glass of wine, holding it up to Nancy. "Literally no problem, Nance. Happy gay day?"

Nancy laughs and grabs her glass but finds it empty. She looks over to the bottle they'd brought over to the coffee table, then back up to Robin standing next to it. Robin grabs the bottle but heads to the kitchen with it. "Oh no missy, I think we've had enough of this tonight," she says, half joking.

Robin hears the sliding door open behind her and Eddie bounces past her into the living room, asking Nancy if they'd picked a movie. By the time she returns with a pitcher of water and glasses for them all, the boys are cuddled up to each other on the couch, kiss drunk and smelling of smoke.

She's just sitting down when Steve asks, "So Nance, Robin tells me you think Eddie and I are perfect for each other."

Nancy rolls her eyes at Steve's obvious fishing. "Well, I'm right aren't I?"

Eddie snickers but Steve presses on. "Sure, if you ask me. I just wondered what you saw there." Robin thinks he must be feeling insecure about being affectionate with Eddie in front of his ex.

Nancy takes pity on him. "Well, you've always just kind of gone through the motions Steve, done what's expected of you. Or, that's what it seemed like from my perspective anyways."

Steve nods to confirm and waits for her to continue. It's funny how he acts like that more often around Nancy, like he still wants her approval.

"Even back in freshman year when you started talking to me, I always thought there was more to you. I think you can write your own story, Steve, be your own person, and I think Eddie is a great example of that."

"Huh," Eddie jumps in. "What about on my side?"

Nancy's head tips over in thought, one of her curls escaping its just-so placement before she rights herself. "I guess you seem like you've always had to be a bit scary to protect yourself and your own, but you're not really like that. You could probably learn a thing or two about letting go of that intimidation tactic from Steve."

Eddie runs his fingers through his hair and pulls a lock of it over his face while she talks, he looks embarrassed, though not uncomfortable, to be the focus of Nancy's insights. It is pretty intense how insightful she can be, like going to a fortune teller.

"That's really thoughtful Nancy," Eddie replies. "Guess I didn't realize you knew me so well or like, knew I existed before all this."

Nancy makes her crinkly happy face, and it's getting increasingly difficult not to fawn over how cute she is after the almost kiss that just happened. Or is it 'just didn't happen?'

Steve turns around in Eddie's lap to whisper something in Eddie's ear and Robin looks away as they share little kisses. She finds that Nancy's looking back at her, and feels the blood rush to her face. Time to create a distraction.

"Yeah, yeah, you're very cute," she announces loudly in the direction of the kissing. "Let's get the movie going!"

Steve surfaces like he'd forgotten he wasn't alone with Eddie. "Right, yeah. Anyone need anything from the kitchen before we start? Want a top up?" He points at Nancy's empty glass.

"Oh no I'm good, I drove here. Besides, Robin already cut me off after I-"

"So has everyone seen The Wizard of Oz before?" Robin's voice comes out shrill, even to her own ears.

As the opening sequence begins, Robin wonders if Nancy knew when she picked it how gay the movie is. She finds her thoughts drifting and racing, huddled under a blanket in the recliner, wishing she were cuddling Nancy like Eddie was Steve, and not really knowing how to feel about that.

----------

Robin gets up first when the credits start to roll.

"Well I feel like Nancy and I should get going, give you two some privacy." She wiggles her eyebrows at Eddie, who hides behind his hair, but she can see him grinning underneath.

"At this point I'm good to drive. Robin, do you want a lift home?"

She swings 'round to see Nancy looking about as nervous as she feels. "Oh, uh yeah, sure!" It's a good thing Steve's so wrapped up in Eddie, or she'd be getting roasted for the squeaking noises she's trying to pass off as a normal response.

They say their goodbyes, trading hugs, kisses to cheeks, and warm words until Robin starts feeling awkward about all of the endearment and tugs the door open with a final, "see ya, dorks!" over her shoulder.

It's a bit tense as they drive off towards Robin's house. She wonders if Nancy will bring it up. She'll probably bring it up, right? Nancy is kind of like that, never shying away from anything, brave. Robin pinches her nose thinking about it, it's not like she's trying to think about it, it's just--

"Robin, I'm really sorry, I think I've made things weird between us."

"No, it's really- I mean who runs away when the prettiest girl in Hawkins tries to kiss you, like, I'm totally the one who made it weird!"

Nancy darts her eyes over to Robin, and back to the road. "No, but I tried to kiss you when you like someone else, even if I am conventionally attractive that's not just a reason I can go around just throwing myself at anyone!"

Robin noticed Nancy's words speeding up as she went, so she didn't bother to pace herself either. "Well yeah like consent and everything, but if you weren't my soulmate's ex and kind of my only friend who's a girl and well, I thought straight, I mean, I just didn't want you to do something drunk and then- And I haven't kissed anyone yet but when I do like, I don't want to wake up the next morning thinking, whoops! That was random, or something."

Nancy looks at her, her eyes wide. She pulls over and puts the car in park. Shit. Robin may have revealed a bit more than she'd meant to. Her hand leaps into her hair, messing it up but a needed outlet for the energy whizzing through her right now.

"What do you mean you've never kissed anyone?" Nancy looks her dead in the eye, not budging.

"Yeah that just sorta slipped out, but I've had crushes before. I've just never acted on them. It's not exactly like Hawkins is drowning in lesbians, either." She slumps.

"Maybe I could help? I helped Steve and Eddie, maybe I could help you with your crush too?"

Robin short circuits, thinking of other ways Nancy could help. Her hands leap out in front of her to wave off the offer. "That's really not necessary, thanks though."

"It's ok, if you're not ready to confess to her or something. I'm sure it's not easy, especially in a place like this."

Nancy smiles sympathetically at her, but it isn't that she's not ready. Quite the opposite, she's practically dying for it at this point. Robin growls her frustration at not being able to clearly say what she feels.

"It's not even that, Nance. It's just, you know when you like someone, but then over time maybe it changes, and you start to question it? Like maybe you liked the idea of them but then you get to know them a bit better and the spark just isn't there like you thought it would be?"

Robin drops her hands, realising they'd been waving around to help her make her point. Nancy takes them in her own, her hands are soft and slightly cool to the touch, but heat flares under Robin's skin. She can feel Nancy trying to catch her eye but she can't quite meet her gaze.

"Are you kidding me? Yes! I know what it's like to let go of liking someone. I thought I was on the right track with Jonathan, but since he got back we realised that we're not the same people we used to be and... It just wasn't there the way it used to be, and the plans we had for our future weren't really realistic, either. But I still love him, even if I'm not in love with him anymore. Coming to terms with that took months." She sighs, lets go and looks out onto the road ahead. "I'm just lucky he's been so good about it, and that we didn't do something stupid like try to move in together or whatever to try to fix something that was never going to work."

It strikes Robin that Nancy was probably going through a lot right now, and she'd probably been going through it all by herself, not asking for help. Something was still bugging her though.

"So uh," she wants to be delicate about this. "I kinda don't buy that you tried to kiss me just because you thought I had a crush on you." Great, super delicate.

Nancy laughs, comes back to the conversation, smiles at her again. "You're right. I'm not really the kind of person who does things for other people. I go after what I want."

"Huh." Robin feels like she's run out of words. Where are all her words!?

"Yeah. It wasn't just the wine or anything. But, I totally get it, if you don't think of me like that. We can just be friends." Nancy smiles warmly at her, and something in Robin breaks.

She shakes her head. "No! I mean, not no like, we can't be friends but, no like, I mean- do you still want to? Kiss me, I mean?"

Robin's heart pounds, she can barely hear over it. She feels like she's just jumped off a cliff and is waiting for the ground to rush up and kick her ass. Nancy's staring at her, she made Nancy speechless, what is happening!?

"You- you want me to take your first kiss?" Nancy's eyebrows are raised in shock, or maybe awe even, and her lips are parted in the tiniest 'oh.'

"Yes! Yep, I would like that I think, if you want to obviously?"

And then it's there. The spark. It's definitely there, because she can see it glimmering in Nancy's eyes, trained on her like she means business. And she can feel it too, her heart rate speeding up into a frenzy as Nancy slides closer and slides her hand tentatively and then more sure right across her face and into her hair, guiding her closer until their lips meet.

And it's just as perfect as Nancy herself. Her lips are so stupidly soft and sweet, Nancy knows exactly what she's doing. Robin tries to keep up but Nancy pushes back and takes over, the hand in her hair guiding Robin so they fall into a just right angle. Robin's certain she's never felt this much in a good way in her life, and a whimper slips out to meet Nancy's tongue as she licks into Robin's mouth, tiniest perfect kitten licks that don't overwhelm but encourage. So she licks back and absolutely embarrasses herself with a moan as their tongues meet. She pulls back, panting.

Nancy's hand moves to tuck a piece of hair behind Robin's ear, and she looks over Robin's face. Nancy doesn't look like she's been shattered into a million pieces like Robin feels, but she thinks she might want to make Nancy feel like that.

"Holy fuck." Robin's brain has closed for the day.

Nancy giggles. "I think I might like kissing girls. Definitely you." And she just leans forward and presses a little baby kiss to the corner of Robin's mouth.

Scratch that, she definitely wants to make Nancy feel like that. She feels dazed.

"Holy fuck," she repeats. "Do that again?"

----------

Eddie's staying over at his place tonight, and it seems like Eddie means to keep his promise, Steve will get as much of this gorgeous man as he wants.

They can't keep their hands off of each other. They crash together into wet, messy kisses as Nancy's car pulls out of the driveway. They hold hands, leading each other around the house to tidy up. He holds Eddie from behind and protests while Eddie does the washing up, and Eddie relents when Steve starts licking and nibbling his neck and shoulder, turning off the water and spinning around in Steve's arms to give back as good as he'd been getting.

Steve pulls away tugging at Eddie's arms walking backwards towards the stairs, and they manage to get to the second floor without escaping each other's hungry touch. Eddie slides a hand into Steve's back pocket as they're brushing their teeth. Steve grins at Eddie when he drops his toothbrush in the holder next to Steve's. After what feels like years they get to Steve's room. Steve lets Eddie take him in while they sit on the bed looking at each other, hovering in that feeling of 'almost' again. It feels like if he says something he'll break the moment, the way Eddie's eyes light him up makes him feel the tension of the moment grow even as a sense of peacefulness washes over him.

"So, big boy, you want me to be nice to you again?" Eddie's voice is low, quiet. Steve feels shivers up his spine to have this much focus on him.

"Hmm, I dunno. What's the alternative?" He's not sure he managed to sound coy, but Eddie's lip twitches halfway to a smile.

"Well," Eddie pauses and gets a mischievous look in his eye. Steve's already leaning towards whatever this option is. "I could be mean in a way I think you might like."

The words are all wrong, but the way Eddie says them is so right. "Oh yeah? Like what?"

"Hmmm." Eddie's hand trails up Steve's arm and the softness of his voice feels like a trap. "Well, some people like a little pain mixed with their pleasure. Some people like to be called mean things, since it feels freeing. Some people like to be told what to do, or be made to work for their release. What do you like, Steve?"

Steve shivers, but he meets Eddie's eyes. Sex isn't new to him, but Eddie is, boys are, and this is... It feels new, too. "I don't know. Maybe we could find out, though. What do you like?"

Eddie reminds him of a cat the way he smirks, one of his canines catching on his lip and Steve wants to lick it. "Ohhhhh pretty boy, I like all sorts of things. How 'bout this. Do you want to blow me? I could tell you what to do, not because it's all that hard to figure out, but because I want to tell you what to do." Steve feels his lips part and Eddie's eyes gleam. "D'you wanna try?"

Steve feels mesmerised, he nods vigorously. Eddie chuckles low in his throat and pets Steve's hair. The hand tightens around a fistful of Steve's long hair and it's like his whole body goes soft. Steve can't help but whine at the feeling of it, and Eddie smiles at him. "You're seriously the jackpot, Steve. I mean, I knew you were a bit of a slut, but you're really so perfect for me."

The words and the way Eddie doesn't let him look away are overwhelming in such a good way. Steve's face is definitely getting hot, he can feel it, but his body is positively on fire. His jeans are already feeling way too confining. He doesn't really know what to say, no one's ever called him slutty- not like that. He feels torn between embarrassment and... Oh, Eddie had said something about mean words, was this part of it?

"Do you... like that I'm slutty?"

Eddie hums a laugh. "Yes sweetheart, I like it. I like that when I tell you how much you seem to be into this, you squirm like that. It's really cute, Steve."

Huh. Two could play at that game. If Eddie likes when he feels shy and cute... Steve bats his eyelashes, acting innocent. "Where should I start, Eds?"

"Hah fuck, Stevie you little tease! You don't need to act for me though, ok? Unless you want to. Just whatever feels right."

It throws Steve off for a second, that Eddie can read him so well. He's not sure what version of himself he's supposed to be, like Eddie pulled up his anchors and he's just floating without direction. But Eddie likes him even though he fucks up sometimes, so maybe it will be ok.

"Yeah, ok." He tries to nod, forgetting Eddie's grip on his head, and ends up pulling his own hair and wincing. Eddie giggles at him.

"Good. Now why don't you get up for a sec and take those clothes off for me, hm?" And he lets Steve's hair go, giving it a final ruffle that soothes the resulting tingles.

It feels good, but Steve forces himself to get up, stumbling a bit. Eddie immediately grabs him by the hips and steadies him. Quick reflexes, Steve notes. Eddie keeps his hands on Steve's hips as Steve pulls his polo off, fingers splaying out to brush over the skin just above his hips before moving to his fly and undoing it for him. Steve wiggles out of his jeans and briefs all at once, leaving him nude but for his socks.

"You seem to be overdressed for the occasion, Eds." He grins watching Eddie's eyes move over him.

"Now that's where you're wrong, hon. How does it feel like this? If I just..." He flicks the buttons of his jeans open, lowers the zip, and palms himself over his boxers, and Steve feels transfixed by the motion of his hand.

"Steve?"

"Yeah?"

"I asked you a question."

"Oh! Uh, I dunno, feels ok."

"Uhuh, and if I told you to kneel?"

Steve's eyes fly back up to Eddie's face, he looks amused. It makes something in Steve want to prove him wrong, so he looks right into Eddie's eyes and slowly kneels between his legs.

It does feel different. He's been naked loads of times in front of other people, that was sports for you, not to mention with girls, but it never felt like this. He feels more exposed with the contrast, all of him on display while Eddie's fully dressed.

"Like this?" It comes out breathy.

Eddie grins. "Just like that, sweetheart."

"Feels different."

"You like it?"

"Mm, yeah. Makes me feel just for you." It doesn't make sense, but Steve doesn't really care right now. It makes sense in his head, and apparently Eddie's too.

Eddie groans, squeezing his obviously hardening length over his boxers as he does. "Fuck, you don't know what that does to me. Such a pretty boy on his knees for me, all undressed for me to look at, calling himself mine? That's so hot, Steve."

Steve isn't sure if it's Eddie's words or the teasing way he's touching himself inches from his face, so close to where he wants, but not close enough, or maybe it's all of those things, but it pulls a whine from his lips. His own dick bobs between his legs trying to pull his attention, but this feels like it should be about Eddie, so he leaves it to ache.

"Eddie, let me see you?"

"Asking for what you want, like such a good little slut. Anything for you, baby."

He'd seen all of Eddie the night before, and they'd touched and kissed and grinded. They'd started to learn each other's faces and noises and tells. It had been an even give and take though. There's nothing even about this, but it feels good sitting at Eddie's feet and waiting for him to tell him what to do. It's relaxing and exciting at the same time, somehow.

Steve's tongue brushes over his bottom lip unthinkingly as Eddie pushes his jeans down just enough to pull himself out, and he wants him in his mouth immediately. Even if he hasn't done this before, if he pays attention he can probably still make it good for Eddie. He wants to make it good for him, be good for him. Plus, Eddie wants to tell him what to do. He looks up to Eddie's face for permission.

Smug bastard has such a grin on. "You look positively ravenous, sweetheart. You want a taste?"

Steve nods and leans in, but Eddie stops him. "Ah ah ahh. Did I say you could touch yet?" Huh, so that's how it was going to work. Steve could listen carefully.

"Not in so many words," he cuts back. "And yeah, I want to taste you, Eds. Please?"

Eddie huffs a laugh under his breath at Steve's fluctuating attitude, and takes Steve's chin in his hand to direct his eyes up to his own face. It stretches Steve's neck and it feels like his whole body is reaching for Eddie.

"Alright, here's what you're going to do. Keep your hands at your sides. Use your tongue, use your lips. Make out with my dick, Steve. You're good at kissing, aren't you? I want you to lick it and suck little kisses all over. But I don't want to see your lips wrapped around me until I say so. You don't get to suck me down until you've earned it. Can you do that for me, baby?"

Steve feels like the floor is dropping out from under him. His own dick twitches at the thoughts Eddie's putting in his head. Eddie seems so easy with his words, even dirty ones. He doesn't bother hiding his surprise, but nods.

"Yeah, I can do that." This time he knows better than to lean in until Eddie says so. He waits. Eddie smiles in recognition. He's made him pleased, and it's a new kind of thrill.

"Good boy. You can touch now, but remember, hands at your side. I'll help you though."

Eddie slides a hand over his cock where it juts out from his boxers, from base to tip so it's flat against his stomach and holds it there, leaning back, presenting the sensitive underside for Steve's kisses.

Steve dives in, impatient. Ignoring his own need, he licks straight up along the path Eddie's fingers had just taken, before mouthing over it in kisses, lips moving messy over soft skin, testing the pressure, pressing his lips and tongue into Eddie's hard length and dragging them over him before sucking soft tiny kisses back up. Eddie hisses in a breath as Steve slides his tongue under Eddie's fingers to lap at the head.

"Woah there, slow down a little there. Savour it, pretty."

Steve looks up through his lashes at Eddie's words but doesn't move off, Eddie's eyes widen at him, he's so flushed. He listens, slows down. Savours. Teases. He settles in, cycling through different things that seem to make Eddie fight for control, going over every inch he can reach, even swinging down to sweep his tongue over Eddie's balls, drawing shapes and patterns into them with his tongue. He tries to remember all the things that get the strongest reactions. He remembers- barely at points- not to swallow anything down until Eddie says.

And Eddie keeps "helping." More like getting in the way, Steve thinks. He shifts his hand so that Steve can get to all of him, but never all at once. It's frustrating, but he kind of likes it. Eddie's such a confusing person, always one thing and its opposite at the same time. It's like he can get lost in the space in between. It's a little heady in the tension, like there's no time here. There's just being good and doing what Eddie says.

Somewhere along the way Eddie starts mumbling, so softly at first that he doesn't quite hear the words, but it gets louder. Strings of "fuck Steve... feels so good, keep doing that," and "that's it sweetheart, such a good boy," but the one that really gets Steve is the, "ohhh my little slut, show me how much you want it," and Steve groans open mouthed around him, making Eddie moan in turn.

"Fuck yeah," Eddie breathes out shakily, finally moving his hand but only to thread it through Steve's hair and tilt his head back to look at him again. "I can feel how much you want me, Steve. I can see it, honey."

His gaze drops down to where Steve sits between his legs, the evidence of exactly how much Steve wants him dark and dripping between his legs. It brings Steve back a little, back into his body. He feels the gentle tug in his hair, the ache in his cock, the slight numbness in his calves from kneeling for so long, and the soft brush of denim against his arms. It's like he'd forgotten he had arms, and he wiggles his fingers. He's breathing hard, but so is Eddie.

"Yeah, Eds." His voice breaks a little but he pushes through. "I like it. I like making you feel good. Can I have more, now? I really wanna feel you in my mouth."

Eddie's eyes shine at that. "Who am I to deny such a sweet, polite, delicious, wanton boy?"

How the fuck does he still have so many words? Steve wants to pleasure him until Eddie loses all his words, wants to empty his brain, just drain it out straight through his cock. Eddie spreads his legs a little further.

"Keep taking it slow alright, just the head first." Eddie keeps a hand in his hair and guides him forward just enough, holding him back more than anything. He uses his grip to move Steve around, brushing his lips over the tip, using him exactly how he wants. It brings the headiness back tenfold, and a whine slips over Steve's lips. He sticks his tongue out for Eddie to rub himself over, opening his mouth invitingly.

Eddie lets him get a tiny bit closer, and the heat of him on his tongue again sends Steve's eyes shut, the salty taste of precum Eddie rubs into his tongue has him whining again, but then Eddie's brushing his tip over Steve's lips and just into his mouth ever so slightly before pulling back and he doesn't want to pause things to beg with words, so he hopes Eddie takes his whining for what it is- a stop teasing me, a just let me have you, a pleading.

"So eager, kitten. Just relax and let me use you. It'll be so easy, you don't even have to work that hard."

Fuck, if he thought being called Eddie's slut was hot, this was a whole other level. It wasn't like when he'd let dates use him, trying to fill up his loneliness with being useful and kind. That had been a clawing hunger for more, but this is a full feeling. Something in him releases, lets go at Eddie's words. He stops trying and lets Eddie take control, lets go of trying to do it right or even think. Eddie's got him. He can just want and want and want and let Eddie use him.

He basks in the feeling, so when Eddie pulls back until he's just resting the tip of his dick on the point of Steve's tongue Steve knows what to do. He doesn't lunge, doesn't suck him in. He just waits, he accepts, he slowly runs the flat of his tongue side to side under the weight of it as Eddie slicks Steve's spit from the wet head down his shaft and pumps himself. He waits for Eddie to tell him what to do, and focuses everything on being just for Eddie. He soaks up Eddie's growls and deep breaths like he's never heard higher praise as Eddie fists his dick, fingers bumping into Steve's lips and tongue every few strokes. He can be just what Eddie wants, what he needs, and nothing else matters.

Eddie's other hand moves from Steve's hair down to his cheek and his thumb hooks past Steve's lips to catch on his teeth, forcing his mouth open even wider. Steve's eyes open wide to look up at him in awe that he can just take exactly what he wants and Steve loves it, trying to communicate that with a look. Eddie smiles down at him before dragging his cock over the flat of Steve's tongue in gentle thrusts that go just barely deeper every time.

"There you go, Stevie, just like that, just relax for me. So good for me, your pretty mouth feels so good on me sweetheart. So- fuck, so good, I love the way you look at me hon, like you'd let me do anything, like you're all mine, like you'd let me do this all night, wouldn't you?"

Eddie's fingers soothe over Steve's cheek as he teases himself. It's so tender, until he pauses and pushes his thumb further in between Steve's molars. Steve whines around it as it hooks between his teeth until he's forced to open wide, lips stretched taught, jaw lax to accommodate him but patient to let Eddie use him however he sees fit.

"You want more?" It isn't really a question, but Steve attempts a gentle nod so as not to dislodge him, humming affirmatively around Eddie's hand. "I'll give you more sweetheart, but you have to be good. You don't get to suck until I say so, but I'll let you have me in your mouth, feel me on your tongue, if you can stay right there for me. Can you do that?"

Steve doesn't really know how Eddie expects him to answer any more than he already has with his hand in the way still, so he puts all of his want into his face and mumbles something nearly resembling "please," sending a drop of spit over his lips to run down his face. He doesn't even feel embarrassed anymore, it kind of adds to everything.

"Alright then, Stevie." And finally Eddie's finger slips out of his mouth, leaving a slight ache in his jaw. They slide over his skin and lips, catching the bead of drool and spreading it around. "You can have a little bit more, not all of it tonight. Don't want my cute little slut choking on his first dick, do I? Well, not yet anyways. Just listen and keep being good for me, and I'll let you have as much as you want, pretty boy."

"Mm, I like being pretty for you," he replies quietly. Pushing the words through the haze past his lips makes Steve feel bold, makes him feel dirty. He wiggles his bare hips and sticks out his tongue to look up at Eddie invitingly.

"Heh. And you're so good at it, Steve. Now stay just like that, sit pretty for me a little longer baby." Eddie's tone is so sweetly mean that it frustrates him. He just wants Eddie in his mouth now, goddamnit, is that so much to ask?

Eddie pets a hand through Steve's hair, sending another wave of calm through him. He takes himself in his hand again and rests the dark tip of his length over Steve's tongue. "F- ah fuck you look gorgeous like that. Eyes up here, Stevie."

Steve opens his eyes, not realising they'd closed, and they feel too heavy to open fully but he manages. Eddie holds eye contact as he pushes against Steve's lips until Steve opens wider. It feels like Eddie's looking right into his mind, seeing exactly how much Steve is burning for him, and Steve doesn't care that he's so exposed. It doesn't matter that Eddie can see him desperate, messy, and spaced out because Eddie said he should just be himself and do what feels good, and Eddie would never judge him for feeling this good.

Steve moans as Eddie drags his cockhead over his tongue, just deep enough that he feels the soft skin of it kiss his palate before retreating. It's soft, gentle at first, until Eddie's other hand comes down to rest on his cheek, holding Steve in place. Then he starts to thrust shallowly, grunting little puffs of air, and Steve loses it. He wants so much more, he wants to wrap his lips around Eddie and take control. But between the way Eddie's eyes don't leave his for a moment and the way Eddie's hand feels like a reminder to be good, he's caught in the moment and the tension just builds until he's moaning, too

He's sure his knuckles are going white grabbing his ankles over the scrunchy cotton of his socks in an effort not to touch himself, but he doesn't even feel it anymore. Spit gathers in Steve's mouth at being held open for so long and he swallows around Eddie's length just as one of Eddie's thrusts reaches that whisper deeper place where Steve can feel him so well, and Steve can't even hear himself over the choked growl that falls from Eddie's lips.

"Oh fuck, Steve, ok, you can have it, baby."

And Eddie's hand slides up his face to grab into Steve's hair, pulling him back, Steve lets his hair be pulled to strain for it. He feels wild, all he can reach is the leaking tip at first, and he swirls his tongue around it before sucking in earnest, finally. Eddie's hand shakes in his hair, but only lets him get a little further at a time until Steve can properly slide his lips up and down Eddie's hard length. It doesn't do anything to satisfy his own desire, but having been so turned on for so long without touching, it feels like his arousal spreads from between his legs and is buzzing through his entire body. Being allowed to move is almost a release of its own- so nearly a release.

Suddenly Eddie's grip tightens and he pulls Steve right off, "stick your tongue out again." It comes out rough. No hesitation. Steve doesn't have to think. He just finds that he's already doing as Eddie demanded.

"Touch yourself, Steve."

Steve watches Eddie's hand fly over himself right in front of his face. He looks concentrated in finding his release, ready to give it all to Steve just because Steve had seemed to like being slutty for him. Being there for Eddie's enjoyment, being there for Eddie to use as he wants fills Steve with hot overwhelm and he doesn't even need to touch himself. He just focuses on keeping his mouth open for Eddie to use while he shakes with excess, with the feeling of being just for Eddie. With being just as useless and pretty as he wants.

He spills right onto the pile of clothes he's kneeling on, and his rough groan is choked out and nasal through the wide hinge of his jaw. The world seems to narrow for a split second until all that's left is keeping his mouth open because Eddie said so, staying right there for him, doing it just right the way Eddie said. The warmth of Eddie's own release hitting his lips brings him back to reality. He keeps his eyes shut and tilts his head back to catch as much as he can get.

He moans at the taste of Eddie, cracking his eyes open as he feels Eddie's fingertips on his lips again, rubbing his come over them, playing with it, not to mention with Steve. That one point of contact is enough in the afterglow to send shivers up Steve's spine.

"Feels tingly," Steve mumbles.

"Yeah?" Eddie smiles, and gets down next to him so they're level again. "How ya feelin'?" He whispers it like a secret.

"So fucking good, Eds," Steve whispers back, shifting to get closer and wincing as pins and needles spread up from his feet. "I think my legs fell asleep though," he explains at Eddie's concerned expression.

"That's ok, lemme help you get into bed."

Eddie gets up, and Steve's lips curl into a lazy smile to see the way his thighs quiver even through his jeans. Come to think of it, why did Eddie still have those on? Eddie helps him up and rubs his hands over Steve's feet and calves until the circulation returns. Steve collapses into his bed and lets Eddie take care of him, toeing off his socks and letting them lie where they fall.

Eddie disappears for a moment, but Steve can hear the faucet in his ensuite running, so he's not worried. Waiting is fine when Eddie's coming back, when he's safe. He lets himself drift off, only half waking up when Eddie returns to run a warm washcloth over his face then over the rest of his body, working his way down over every inch before throwing it haphazardly away from the bed. The air tickles against his damp skin until Eddie pulls the covers over them to snuggle into Steve's back. Eddie must have turned the light out at some point because it's dark and warm, and everything feels perfect again.

----------

They wake slowly with the sun beating through the window onto their entangled legs, smiling and brushing gently over the little dips and grooves of each other's bodies in the way that tends to happen on a really good morning after. Steve wonders if Eddie's had many mornings like this, he himself has only had a couple of the really good ones.

"Good morning, Stevie."

Steve clears his throat. "Mm, very good." He stretches out like a cat, luxuriating in the softness of waking together. "I think you're right, you know."

The corner of Eddie's mouth curls happily. "There's a first for everything. What about?" He rolls onto his stomach and kicks his legs in the air behind him. It's cute and stupid and so Eddie.

Steve boops him on the nose. "I don't think I can be casual about this, like, at all."

"Ah, that one. Well then, it's a good thing you threw that suggestion out the window." Eddie looks down at the blankets, playing with them and picking nonexistent bits of fluff off them. "What made you think about that, hm?"

Steve hums in thought. Eddie's acting so shy and sweet, it's a contrast from the way he was acting the previous night. He hopes he gets to see all of Eddie's different sides. "I just... You do things to me. Like last night, that was amazing."

Eddie's twisted in the sheets, getting partly stuck and pulling a piece of hair over his face. "Stevie, you can't just say that. You're gonna make me feel things." He punctuates his playful whining with a pout.

"Heh, I could show you some things to feel."

Eddie snorts. "Oh yeah?" He lifts the covers to address Steve's morningwood directly. "Are you feeling left out after last night?"

Steve swats his hair. "But seriously, Eds." He waits to get Eddie's attention back, tucking a wayward curl behind Eddie's ear. "I've never felt anything like that before. I don't even know how to describe it."

Eddie nods his head in thought. "Uh, was it kind of like being hypnotised? All relaxed and shit, like a puppet?"

Huh. "Yeah, kinda."

"Yeah, I think I know what that is. It's like a natural high when you're giving up power by choice." He looks thoughtful. "Don't think I ever made anyone feel that way before. There's gotta be a lot of trust."

Ah, that made sense. He'd trust Eddie to the end of the world and back, literally. "Did you ever do it the other way? Like you being the puppet?"

Eddie snickers and gets up to rifle through Steve's dresser, turning his nose up at the neatly folded briefs before picking up his boxers from yesterday instead. "Nah, there's a reason I've got the puppet master ink." He vaguely gestures to his arm while pulling them on, resulting in almost falling over.

"How does such a goofball act so smooth, huh? You must've done this a lot."

Eddie pauses mid-closet snooping, looking over his shoulder at Steve lounging in bed still. "Not exactly a lot. Where are your normal t-shirts?"

"In the drawers. What's not a lot? Like, have you dated anyone? I feel like I would have noticed but I guess you would have been flying under the radar. Or just, like casual stuff?"

"Uh, neither, really."

"What?"

Eddie mumbles something, curling in on himself like he wanted to climb into the drawer full of plain white tees and hide there.

Steve sits up. "Uh, I didn't quite catch that."

"I've only ever made out before, Steve." Eddie spins around, arms wide and a tight grin on his face, and Steve feels like his eyebrows are trying to climb into his hair. "Ahhhhh, the jig is up!" He says it like a growl, growing louder, and it reminds Steve of when he used to stand on the tables during lunch and give speeches. "You caught me, darlin. It's the blind leading the blind out here."

It takes Steve a moment, caught on the idea that Eddie's just been making all of this up as he goes along. "But- You know what you're doing! I just assumed-"

"Assumed the only freak in Hawkins has been able to sleep around as much as you have, my dear? No, the only dungeons I frequent are unfortunately the ones I design for the twerps. I will say though, playing the villains does add up to some good practice in the dramatic flair department."

Steve snorts. "Dramatic flair doesn't really cover everything we did last night." He reaches his hands out and Eddie grasps them gently, running his fingers over Steve's palms.

"Well, there are some resources if you know where to look. Certain magazines they sell you with a brown paper bag, for example? There are some that cater towards more specific tastes, with very educational articles. Like how to give a spanking, or breath through pain, or even one on how not to choke on a dick, for example? S'kinda why I wanted to take it easy with you last night, uh, I was pretty sure you hadn't read anything like that."

It's really cute the way Eddie speeds up when he's excited about something. Steve giggles and shakes his head, then stops as Eddie's words catch up to him. "Wait, that was taking it easy? Jesus, Eds."

"Well, I wasn't gonna make you deepthroat me your first time! Or is that what you wanted? So desperate for me, Stevie!" He holds a hand to his chest in a mockery of dignified shock, and it sends Steve into another fit of giggles.

"You could have told me, Eddie. It's not my first time being someone's first time."

Eddie rolls his eyes. "Yeah I bet, your Grace." He bends at the hip, twirling a hand as he bows.

Steve snorts at the mock bow. "Shut up! I mean, I was feeling a little jealous myself thinking about all those hot guys you secretly seduced under everyone's noses." Conceding to flatter Eddie's pride seems to do the trick, Eddie sits back down on the bed with him to pull on one of Steve's shirts.

"Jealous of me again, eh? Guess I wasn't too bad then, huh."

Steve huffs. "Not too bad? Not too bad!?" He grabs a pillow, about to stuff it in Eddie's face.

Just then, the doorbell rings, and a flurry of knocks sound out over it.

Eddie looks at him. "You expecting anyone?"

Steve shakes his head, confused. "Nah, but it sounds important. I'll go see."

He gets dressed quickly as the ringing and knocking continue, and opens the door to a flustered Nancy.

"Oh thank goodness, I thought you were still sleeping." She brushes right past him into the kitchen and grabs his kettle. "Coffee?"

----------

Steve's sitting at the kitchen island when Eddie gets down, and Nancy's scooping tinned coffee grounds into the fancy plunger pot thing Steve uses. Eddie's stomach twists at how familiar Nancy is with the kitchen, but he pushes it down and sits down next to Steve.

"Wheeler, so early to see you!"

She smirks over her shoulder. "Oh, did I interrupt your fun?" She doesn't look sorry at all. "Looks like you managed to get something done last night by the state of Steve's neck."

He follows her gaze and yep, hickies. How did he not notice those? Steve tries to act cool about it but his cheeks turn a light pink. Fuck he's pretty.

"I'm sure I don't kiss and tell, my good lady." Steve elbows him with a snarky "you sure 'bout that?" Oh he was so going to get it later, the little brat. He shoots him a scathing glance.

Nancy seems nervous about something. Eddie wills his Steve butterflies away and focusses back on her in case it's anything serious.

"There is a reason I'm here, obviously, I just-" She huffs a sigh and pinches her nose. "I kissed Robin, ok?" She turns around from pouring the boiled water after placing the kettle back on its burner and levels them with a look, like she's daring them to react.

Eddie looks at Steve, whose mouth may as well be on the floor, and back at Nancy. She crosses her arms over her chest.

"Well, don't all speak at once."

Steve sputters back to reality. "You what!? Ok, speaking as Robin's best friend, that's probably amazing, but speaking as your ex, you can't keep doing this!"

She grimaces, "Oh- I really should have given you the context first, I'm so sorry Steve. Didn't mean to bring up old wounds."

Eddie wonders briefly what happened between them as Steve gesticulates wildly for her to continue. It's kind of endearing how much Steve loves to gossip, he's so vivid even though they just woke up.

"So, I'm not with Jonathan anymore. Not the point though because," she switches to a stage whisper, "I kissed Robin!"

Eddie gets up to clap her on the back. "Congratulations! I hope? That's a good thing, right?"

She bites her lip. "I think so. I'm not sure. I mean I wanted to, but I'm not sure if she really did."

Ah, there it was. Nancy was freaking out about a girl. Eddie wanted to do a little happy dance, it was so cute to see her worked up over this. He pokes her arm. "Did you like it?" He says it playfully, twirling a strand of hair around a finger waiting for her to answer.

"Not sure how to judge that one, Eddie. Did it probably change my life? Yes! But is that for the better? I don't know yet!" She sighs. "She seemed into it, but I know there's someone else she likes."

"Oh right!" Steve clicks back into gear. "She didn't kiss her though."

"Yeah, I know, she said it was her first kiss." Looks like Eddie wasn't the only one crossing some things off his list of firsts last night, Eddie mentally sends Robin a fist pump.

Nancy gets a sly look before adding, "and second, and-"

"Ahp-bap, I don't need to hear the details, Nancy!" For all his experience, Steve could be surprisingly prudish.

"So, what's the problem?"

Nancy glances at the clock on the microwave, furrowing her delicate brows. "I just, I don't know if she wanted me or if she just wanted to be kissed. She doesn't even know if her crush likes her! Maybe she never kissed them because she was scared, not for lack of interest."

They ponder for a minute. The clock on the microwave finally meets with Nancy's approval, and she plunges the coffee and starts making them all a cup. Eddie's not sure he's ever told her how he takes his coffee, but she seems to know anyway. Who is he to question the lady Nancy's omnipotence?

And then Steve has a stroke of inspiration. "Hey Nance, why don't you just ask her out? You're really good at dates."

They share a smile, kind of sad and happy at the same time, and despite how certain everything feels between Steve and himself so far, the history between these two is palpable. He'd picked up on it last spring, and now again. He takes a deep breath, reminding himself that they're just friends, and Steve is literally wingmanning for her right now.

"Yeah that's, that's a good idea." Nancy looks into her coffee like it holds all the answers to Robin's affection. She's right of course, Eddie knows from experience that the first cup of the day generally does hold the answers to life.

"Yeah, ask her on a picnic or something! I know a good spot, I can show you later." Yep, that sounds normal, he's totally fine and normal and definitely not irrationally jealous. Good.

Nancy agrees, and they drink the rest of their coffees helping her plan the perfect Robin-wooing adventure. Eddie's stomach eventually unties itself as they both go into full on planning mode. Steve and Nancy are both so focused on thinking about Robin and what she'd like that the usual awkwardness whenever they're in a room together dissipates. It must be good for them, Eddie thinks.

----------

He's barely gotten Eddie to himself again after Nancy leaves, full of plans to make her potential date with Robin go perfectly, when the front door opens again. No knock this time, because Robin knows she doesn't need to. Hm, maybe they should revise that policy given recent... developments.

He unwraps himself from Eddie, turning in his lap from their place on the couch. Eddie whines under his breath just loud enough for Steve to hear his disappointment but keeps his arms around Steve's waist as Robin kicks off her shoes before plopping down on the couch right next to them.

She looks neutral, blank, a sure sign that she isn't having a good time. He aims to keep things light.

"Heya Robs, I'm guessing you're not here to join in?"

Her nose crinkles but she only looks slightly less tense. She grabs his face between her hands, squishing it slightly while they lock eyes. Ah, this was serious business. "I have to tell you something."

Eddie relaxes back into the cushions, ready to wait this one out. Given Nancy's earlier visit they had a pretty good idea of where this was going, but they weren't about to spoil her big moment, either.

She takes a deep breath, perhaps to steel herself or maybe just in preparation to get out at least a paragraph's worth of words before the next one. "So please don't be mad but I don't like Vickie anymore. I know you really tried to help me with that! But I just. I think I needed to like her but that was all it was. And I know she's your ex so it's like illegal but also I kissed Nancy. Shit! I shouldn't have said that, but uh, well now you know I guess! Are you mad? About any of this?"

He grins back at her. "Nope, not mad Robs."

She squints suspiciously. "Why are you not freaking out?"

"Should we freak out?" He looks at Eddie questioningly.

Eddie looks back at Robin. "Does this warrant a good freakout or a bad freakout? I happen to be masterful at all varieties of freakout."

Robin huffs, crossing her arms at them before uncrossing them to gesture freely. "Guys this is serious! You're telling me my crush of over a year fading away and me not only illegally kissing Nance but then also telling you about it which I definitely should have asked her about first is just... Fine!?"

She gets up and starts pacing. Her face is actually getting a little red.

"I know you guys are a little wrapped up in each other and that's great and all but I've just almost been kissed, realised there's a reason I haven't done anything about Vickie since things calmed down, then actually been kissed-- For the first time I might add! And it was your" she points at Steve, "ex who kissed me! Isn't that breaking best friends rules!? And the worst part isn't even that I think I may have just blown it by telling you guys, because that's a huge breach of trust so even though I know you can keep a secret like, that's pretty bad. The worst part is that I think I need to do it again!"

Eddie pipes in before she has an aneurysm. "Well, that's good, 'cause she was here earlier asking us for advice on how to woo you."

Huh. So there was a way to get Robin to go quiet.

"Dude, you're such a shit stirrer sometimes."

"Don't call me dude, Harrington."

"Don't call me Harrington, dude."

"Touché."

Robin resurfaces from the shock. "What?"

Steve gets up, ignores Eddie's pouting, and takes Robin's hands. "She told us like an hour ago, sorry Robs. I wish you'd gotten to tell me for yourself first. I didn't know about the Vickie part though."

"What did she say?"

"Mm, I probably shouldn't tell you, since it's a surprise. I think I can say that she was really hoping you were into it."

Eddie snorted. "More like she was having a melt down trying to figure out how to tell if you liked her back."

Steve throws him a look but Eddie just looks pleased with himself.

"You wanna start over and I'll pretend I just woke up and don't know any of it yet?"

Eddie grumbles, impatient to be Steve's centre of attention again, but goes to start another pot of coffee as Robin walks Steve through the events of the previous few days. They hear him fussing over Steve's "fancy ass coffee thingy" and they let him interrupt with questions about it until he comes back with three steaming mugs. The coffee's not quite as good as when Nancy made it, but Eddie still made it for him, so it's perfect too.

"So from what I innocently overheard from the kitchen-"

"Think you mean eavesdropped."

"Innocently overheard, seems like you and Wheeler may have both had some interest in each other for a while now, and just didn't realise it yet. Explains a lot, really."

Robin looks at Eddie incredulously. "Like what!?"

"Oh, like the awkwardness at my place when you both came to talk to me about this little troublemaker?" He raises an eyebrow at Steve.

"Hey!"

"Dingus, pay attention." She narrows her eyes at Eddie. "What awkwardness? Like the usual amount or like-"

"Gonna stop you right there, I don't think there was any way that conversation wouldn't have been more than the usual amount, Buckley. Maybe awkward isn't the right word." He taps his fingers against his chin in thought, a gesture for everything ready to go. He points at Robin once the right word appears to him. "Charged. It felt charged. I mean, I wasn't entirely focused on it at the time, but both of you were acting a little bit tense about each other."

Steve couldn't hold back anymore. "Why does it matter if it was awkward, or charged, or whatever? You like her, she likes you, everything's fine isn't it?"

"That's a good point, Stevie. Yeah, I don't see a problem."

Robin chews on her lip. "So, what do I do then?"

Eddie and Steve share a look. Steve replies. "You're not gonna like this bit."

"What?"

"Wait for her to come talk to you."

Robin makes a face. "Steve, you know how I feel about waiting."

"You know Nancy acts fast once she has a plan. Trust me on this?"

She exhales a strong sigh. "Fine."

And with that, she gets up and starts lacing up her shoes, only turning back for a quick "see ya," before heading out.

"You expecting any more unexpected visitors today or do I finally get you all to myself?" Steve shakes his head, smiling, as Eddie's arms wrap around him again, and they pick up where they left off.

They spend the day together, cooking, eating, feeding each other, cleaning up after, taking breaks to make out on the couch. It's soft and tender, and neither leaves the other's side for too long before being pulled back in.

It has Steve noticing that feeling again, wanting to be so close to Eddie that he can hear his breathing, feel his heartbeat. Maybe when they're so close they touch, all of this seems more real? He still feels shocked that any of this is happening, but it's hard to worry that it's too good to be true when Eddie's there anchoring him with his touch, continuing to be alive and right there and all over him. It just feels safe and warm, perfect. It feels the way it had that first night.

"Eddie?" He mumbles into his own sweater, wrapped around Eddie's back while Eddie washes their dinner plates in the sink.

"Yeah?"

"It was really nice being with you all day today."

"Mm, I'm glad you had the day off. Work tomorrow?"

"Yeah, at eleven. Don't wanna think about it though."

Eddie chuckles softly. "Oh yeah, what do you wanna think about, sweetheart?"

Steve rubs his face in his own sweater that had somehow ended up on Eddie, hiding his blush even though Eddie isn't looking at him. Eddie seems to have a sixth sense for making him blush. "You have so many names for me."

The last plate clinks gently as Eddie puts it in the drying rack and turns around in Steve's arms.

"You like the pet names, baby? Is there one you like best?"

There is nowhere to hide this time so he lets himself feel the warmth deepen on his face looking right back at Eddie.

Steve shakes his head. "I like them all. I was thinking, there's something you haven't called me yet. Something I'd like."

"Oh. Well if thinking about it makes you look that cute I'd like to know what it is." Eddie leans into him so they're cheek to cheek and whispers, "is it something really filthy?"

It makes him laugh, he laughs so much when they're together. "It's not that, Eds. I was thinking, hoping really, that you'd call me your boyfriend." He pulls back, wanting to see Eddie's reaction.

Eddie looks frozen between emotions, oh no, was it too soon? He'd kind of brought it up the other day during his toast and that had seemed fine, and they'd talked about feeling serious, but maybe he'd misread things? Maybe-

"Steve, that's so fucking sweet, of course I'll call you my boyfriend," and Eddie drew him up into a fierce hug, squeezing him tight. "Baby, you're all mine and I'm not letting go. Well, metaphorically that is, because I don't have quite the guns you have so I can't keep this up forever."

He doesn't have the heart to roll his eyes behind Eddie's back. "Then you're mine, too Eddie." He presses a kiss into his boyfriend's neck, and then on his boyfriend's cheek, feels Eddie's arms loosen and slide down to his waist. They meet for a kiss to seal it, slow and tender.

----------

They spend that night together, and most nights together. Sometimes he asks Eddie to be nice to him, but often he asks him to be mean. Mornings though are always sweet. It seems like every morning when they wake up in each other's arms they're snuggled a little closer than the last. Steve likes waking up wrapped up in Eddie, tangled up in his warmth, surrounded by his softness. He likes how grumpy Eddie is in the mornings, how he can tell when Eddie wakes up because he squeezes Steve tighter, not letting go just like he promised.

It makes the slowly increasing chill in the morning air more bearable. It's only been a few weeks since he woke up freezing in his car, but it feels longer. This particular morning Eddie is curled around him from behind, he can feel his slow breathing in his hair. He lets himself wake slowly to it, the way Eddie's breath tickles and the way Eddie's arms around him feel safe, those feelings fill him up until he could be shining. One of Eddie's legs is resting on one of his, it feels right to have his weight on him.

Eddie shifts, noses his hair a little and squeezes his arms tighter around Steve's waist, one of his hands scratching across Steve's belly softly until it makes him wriggle.

"Mm gonna need my arm back before it falls asleep, baby," Eddie mumbles.

Steve takes Eddie's hand, the one on top of him, brings it to his lips and brushes a kiss across his knuckles before lifting it off of him and getting up to find his sweats where they're draped over Eddie's half finished Halloween costume. He smiles while pulling them on at Eddie's grumbles. He's predictable, making these little gremlin noises every morning in protest of being awake while rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. The little routines they've settled into are so comforting.

He turns around to watch Eddie but sees movement outside through the window.

"Eds, look, it's snowing."

"What? It's not- huh. It never snows in October."

They crowd the window, staring at the snow as it catches the morning light and makes the air sparkle. It's fine and bright, falling right down and melting as it hits the tarp over the empty pool. He leans into Eddie as they watch it quietly.

"First snow of the year always seems so special," Eddie mumbles, like he's afraid to be too loud unless it scares the snow away. "Hey, I know it's not Sunday but do you want to invite Robin and Nancy over? If it snows enough we can play in it."

Steve nods into Eddie's shoulder, smiling. It's nice how Eddie's always getting them to be playful. He forgets he can do that sometimes, getting caught up in taking care of everyone else.

"Yeah, I'll go call them."

----------

Eddie's measuring coffee for the french press when Steve gets back from calling Robin, and he's got a package of pancake mix out on the counter next to the stove. Steve leans over the island and rests his chin on his hands to watch Eddie putter around the kitchen. He fishes a mixing bowl out of the cupboard and a whisk out of the drawer. He knows where everything is now.

Eddie doesn't bother being quiet while he's getting everything ready to make breakfast either. He hums little bits of songs, talking to himself or Steve- even to the kettle as it starts to sing. It fills the space with the sense of ease Eddie always has about himself.

It doesn't take long for the girls to arrive, and the four of them settle into the routine they usually save for Sunday mornings when they hang out at Steve or Eddie's place for a late breakfast together. It's nice to be able to be themselves all together, to have witnesses to their affection. Going out means being careful, stealing glances and friendly touches. Sometimes it's even fun to toe the line, holding hands in the van at a stoplight when Eddie drives him to work, or letting a hug goodnight linger in front of the kids. They would probably tell them eventually.

But for now it's just Robin and Nancy who they can be themselves around. It's a new kind of secret, a good one. For once the secret makes him smile, like when Eddie comes up in his thoughts at work, or when he catches Robin staring into space in the middle of a conversation and knows she's thinking about Nancy.

"You know for a while I hated making anyone a coffee," Nancy pipes up, startling Steve out of his thoughts. "Reminded me of those awful guys at the newspaper." Her nose scrunches at the idea. "But it's different if it's us."

"I think I know what you mean. It's the same thing, but it's different."

She smiles at him easily. Things are a lot easier between them these days.

Eddie and Robin are huddled around the stove, whispering at each other. Steve nods towards them at Nancy. "Think they're up to something."

It catches Robin's attention. "We're deciding what shapes to make." Something about her expression seems too devious for that to be the whole truth. Eddie elbows her, confirming it.

Steve rolls his eyes at them, making Nancy snort. She asks, "what did you end up going with? Snowmen for the snow?"

Eddie looks back at her and wiggles his eyebrows while Robin steadfastly does not turn around.

"It's probably a dick or something," Steve guesses. The maybe-dick pancake seemingly makes it out of the pan onto a plate and he and Nancy get into a conversation about the kids.

Suddenly something flies through the kitchen right towards Steve. Warmth brushes past his hair as he flinches out of the way. No way...

"Did you just throw food at me?"

Eddie, spatula in hand, grins back at him. "Nope! I threw a snowball at you! 'Sides, you never eat the first one, so it's not food."

Steve looks at the floor, where the slightly crumpled pancake landed, it was a completely ordinary circle. Nancy has a hand over her mouth, eyes gleaming with mirth.

Steve's fists find his hips as he glares back, but he can feel the laughter bubbling up as he tries to keep a straight face. "What if there had been ice in the snowball, Eddie? Someone could have lost an eye!"

Robin loses it and that sends Steve folding over with laughter too. Eddie waltzes over and picks up the pancake and takes a bite out of it before handing Nancy the spatula to let her take over. Steve lets Eddie unfold him and kiss him on the cheek with a mouthful of first pancake.

"You're so gross," Steve tells him, smiling.

"I'll take that for the compliment it is."

Steve drifts into pensiveness again as they devour breakfast with the second round of coffees. He thinks about how Robin was so nervous to tell him about Nancy a few weeks ago, but she trusted him enough to tell him about it. Now he gets to know that his best friend in the whole world is happy. They're so good together, each overflowing with something the other needs. Robin's so unafraid to make a fool of herself and Nancy's so confident, they balance each other out.

There had been a while there where it was kinda weird with Nancy, but she'd volunteered to help Steve out when he called to ask her to drive Robin around, not even knowing what it was for, so he knows she cares. And now Nancy is making Robin so happy, feeding her bites of pancake drowning in syrup and butter the way Robin likes.

And with Eddie, everything feels new. Eddies shuffles things up around himself, makes them better just by being there. Steve used to hate breakfast, dreading coming up with something to feed himself, but Eddie makes it an excuse to touch and laugh and be near each other. It's refreshing.

And it's like that with the heavier things, too. When he has bad days and his thoughts spin, Eddie will just sit with him and read or draw, and it makes it a little easier having him as a tether to hold onto, it usually keeps him from spinning all the way out.

"Hey, we should go for a walk in the snow after this," Nancy suggests.

Steve's eyes crease as Eddie reacts to the word walk like a dog would, getting excited and getting up to walk around while he finishes the last bite, too full of coffee, energy, and happiness to sit still any more. "You can't say that word around Eddie if you don't mean it, Nance."

Robin tilts her head at him.

"Walk," he mouths, and they share a smirk.

They bundle up and get outside, the late October sun and unseasonably early snow making the world glimmer. Eddie runs around trying to catch the snow on his tongue but he comes back after a minute to walk with Steve, his cheeks and nose pink from the cool air and the exertion.

"You ok big boy? You've been so quiet this morning."

"Yeah, I'm good. I was just thinking, is all."

"What were you thinking about?"

"Just like, all the shit over the years we've had to keep a secret. They were never good ones."

Eddie nods sagely, kicking his feet out in front of him as they walk, but Steve knows he's paying attention in his own way.

"Like, I know the face Robin makes when Nancy teases her about taking so long to admit she likes her. And the way Robs will like, catch my eye when you're talking about me and get all mushy."

"Ah!" Eddie holds a hand to his chest, playing affronted. "I do not get mushy, Steve Harrington. I get romantic."

"Mhmm. You get other things, too."

"True, I'm a man of many talents. Sometimes I get mushy, sometimes I get hard." He pauses as Steve snorts. "Think I know what you mean, though. I felt pretty alone about being gay for a long time. But luckily I didn't have to keep any secrets about the Upside Down stuff by myself. I had you, and all of them," he gestured with a wave to the girls. "The whole gang."

"Yeah, I uh, didn't really have that after the first time it happened. It got easier after Dustin started following me around demanding things, and then even more with Robin. I guess hers was the first good secret I knew, but it wasn't mine."

"Robin's really good with other people's secrets, you know. Made sure I was ok talking with Nancy when they came over- just before we got together. I'm glad you had someone you could trust like that."

Robin must have heard them talking about her, she slows down until they're all walking together. "You talkin' bout me, dingus?"

"I was just saying it was really big when you came out to me, Robs. Not right away obviously, we were a little busy. But it was the first time someone trusted me to know something good." Robin takes his hand in hers as he continues, "and now I know so many things that are just really nice like that. It just makes me feel..."

"Trusted?" Nancy asks.

"Loved?" Eddie guesses.

"Special?" Of course Robin got it, their best friend telepathy is reliable.

"Yeah. Special, and all those things. Like I won't be alone."

"You guys gonna tell everyone soon? Or keep it secret?" Eddie asks Robin.

"Well, seeing as Mike caught me climbing down the drainpipe this morning, it might not be a secret for long."

Eddie laughs at that. "You know no one would suspect if you just stayed over but didn't sneak out."

"I wanted to see if I could do it!" Robin looks away in embarrassment.

Nancy pats her shoulder. "Don't worry, I can always blackmail him."

"I like the way things are right now," Steve says. "I want to enjoy it a bit before everyone finds out."

Eddie smiles at him. "Anything you want, Stevie. 'S long as I can be there for it."

"Just a bit longer. But I do want to tell everyone, know why?"

"Why's that?"

"Because we've had enough bad secrets. I want them to know something good, too."

fin.