Chapter Text
When the Knolastname couple awoke that morning, it was to a familiar yet unwelcome guest sitting in their open bedroom window.
"Sir..." The little white-haired imp named Moxxie grumbled, "have you somehow not gotten tired of me telling you to STOP BREAKING INTO OUR HOUSE?!"
"Ah, c'mon, Mox, don't be a bitch!" Replied the larger imp with even larger horns, and their employer, Blitz. "Of course I get tired of listening to your whining. But I wanna make sure my favorite employee isn't late for work!"
"Since when was I your favorite employee?" The thespian asked.
"Oh, you? In your wet dreams, Mox," Blitz scoffed. "I meant Millie-Billie!" He made his winning baby-eyed face at the other imp in the room, the farm girl snickering at it. Moxxie growled, a sound like an angry dog.
"If you do not get out THIS FUCKING INSTANT....!" He snarled, stomping to the window and shoving his boss. Blitz, not seeing it coming, lost his balance on the windowsill and flailed his arms.
"Woah, shit, FUCK!" He yelled, before he disappeared out of sight to the sound of a dumpster being slammed into, followed by a cat scrambling away. The imp rolled out of the pile of garbage at the bottom of the alley, picking junk out of his horns as he waved. "Alright, see you guys outside, car's waitin'!"
And he went whistling away. Moxxie slammed the window shut hard enough to almost crack the glass, and stormed away from it cursing under his breath. Millie sat up with a yawn, pursing a lip in concern at her husband's back.
"Hon?" She said. "You alright?"
"I'm NEVER alright when he shows up," Moxxe spat through gritted teeth as he began to dress for the day. "Just one, I just want one FUCKING good thing from him, we had something GOING for a while! You would've thought being kidnapped by my father would've change his perspective!"
"Well, it is Blitz," Millie said, getting out of bed and beginning to change clothes. "I'd be surprised if anything changed his perspective. But we had that week! And it was a good week, wasn't it?"
"Of course it was," Moxxie turned to her, all anger leaving his voice for a moment as he gave her a loving gaze. "It was an incredible week." He slowly looked away as his anger returned, stormed into the kitchen, and added, "but it would've been even better if it stuck. One week, he gave us, and then it was back to this!"
Indeed, it had been two weeks since Blitz's kidnapping at the hands of Moxxie's own father, the mob boss Crimson, and a month since their battle atop Iglesia del Monte with the insane Father Dobronov. At the time, Moxxie and Millie hadn't really paid their eccentric boss' absence in the office that day any mind, until Loona arrived saying she was somewhat nervous, as he was absent from home as well. Just as they were about to look for him, however, Blitz had arrived at the office, battered and bruised, and told them the tale of how his old enemy Fizzarolli and he had teamed up against the gangster and had even begun reforging the bonds of their friendship. After that, Blitz's nightly routine of spying on the couple had seemingly stopped, and for a week, Moxxie and Millie had hoped he was done with the obsession for good. But this week had dashed those hopes, as he had shown up every day this week. Under their bed, in their rafters, hell, they even found him in a secret compartment he'd carved into their wall himself and covered with a fake grate. Now, Blitz wasn't even trying to hide it with this window stint, and Moxxie was at his wit's end.
"Mox, maybe he really did just miss us," Millie said, joining him in the kitchen. "I mean, bad habits are hard to kick, hon, and Blitz was never one to kick any of his. Maybe he's just indulging a bit before going cold turkey again."
Moxxie sighed as he brewed their coffee. "Maybe...should we tell him to step off?"
"You can, though none of the times in the past have worked," His wife replied. "Just let him run his course, hon. And besides, he's not hurtin' anybody!"
"I KNOW he's not, but you hate this just as much as I do!" Moxxie said, pouring out their coffee and handing her mug over. "At least, I hope so. But you never seem to get angry about it. Not that I like seeing you angry...even if it is a bit hot."
Millie smirked. "Hon, I grew up with my Ma, Pa, and five siblings on a farm half the size of your douchebag dad's house. Privacy isn't a thing where I'm from." She twisted a finger around his chest and sipped her coffee. "Let's just let the day run its course, alright? I'm sure he'll leave us alone eventually."
"Yeah..." Moxxie said. "Hopefully."
But those hopes were also dashed rather quickly. As soon as they entered the company van, Blitz welcomed them with a "'Bout fuckin' time, you guys! Get your baby dick stuck in your zipper or somethin', Mox?"
Moxxie went deep red. "Sir, we have talked about this every single time-!"
He was interrupted by the radio absolutely SHRIEKING with Blitz's horrid metal music, and Moxxie had barely gotten in the van before it sped off and shot the imp into the back seat. They made it to the office in their usual fashion, and the crew of I.M.P. all cluttered into the office and dispersed to their duties.
Moxxie gave a grunt as he lifted a small stack of papers, turning to place them down and file them, only to yelp like a dog when a certain daughter of his boss stepped on his hoof, her swishing tail knocking a good chunk of the papers from the stack.
"Watch it, fatty," Loona said, the gothic Hellhound barely giving the words emotion as she refused to look up from her phone, walked to her desk, and propped her feet up on it. Moxxie growled a little, but took a deep breath, gathered the papers, and carried on.
Later, as he was attempting to copy some documents they needed to mail out, the photocopier gave a sound like a broken whistle, and with a chunk, began spewing black smoke out of its back. Moxxie groaned and kicked the machine, at which point it upchucked ink into his face. He stood there, almost disbelieving of his luck, before he took another, deeper breath, and went to get some rags to clean up the mess.
At noon, Moxxie sighed with content as he went for his lunch break, popping open the fridge and going for his salad...only to find it gone. He blinked, slowly clenching the hand into a fist, and stepped out of the break room.
"Pardon me, everyone," He said with a strained voice that said he knew the answer already. "Has anyone seen my lunch?"
"Oh, shit, was that yours, Mox?" Blitz said, in the middle of chewing a cherry tomato. "I didn't know, Loonie and I split it."
"It was a salad big enough for one person," Moxxie said.
"Yeah, big enough for one YOU, maybe, but us not-fat people eat normal portions," Blitz replied. "Besides, you didn't put your name on it."
"The Tupperware literally had an M on it," Moxxie said, pointing to the container in his boss' hands that had an M on top.
"Yeah, but that doesn't mean you, it could've been Millie's!" Blitz said.
"So you would've stolen Millie's lunch?" Moxxie replied incredulously.
"Oh no, I like Millie too much. Besides, she doesn't eat salads."
"Then...why did..." Moxxie went so tense trying to think his way through Blitz's twisted logic that Millie could see him trembling, and she got up and put an arm around his to lead him away.
"It's alright, hon, you can have some of mine," Millie said. "I even packed a little extra."
That afternoon, Moxxie entered Blitz's office with a paper and pencil, and tapped it as he walked in.
"Alright, sir, I've compiled the office report you wanted, and-" He stopped when he looked up, and found Blitz making out with one of his several horse figurines. He stopped as Moxxie spoke, and the pair stared at each other for a moment before the boss imp put the toy down.
"The fuck, Mox, you can see I'm busy, right?! Or are you blind, too?" He barked.
"Sir, you scheduled this time in for this report," Moxxie said, gesturing at the clock. "If you remember, I came by this morning and asked when you wanted this, and you said at this time."
"Ap-ap, a good worker doesn't make excuses, Mox, they get shit done!" Blitz replied, putting his boots up on his desk. "So, what've you got?"
"Well, for starters, the new photocopier that I recommended be added to the budget has yet to be even mentioned again." Moxxie started, putting on a pair of glasses to read the list.
"The fuck's wrong with the old one? Did you break my shit again, Mox?!" Blitz said.
Moxxie's fingers crinkled the paper a little as he tensed a bit. "No, Blitz. The 'old one' is about half a century out of date, and has sprung yet another leak, not to mention the motor has burned out, again." He glanced up. "I've recommended we replace it for the past few years, and-"
"We don't need a new one, just fix it!" Blitz said. "Motors are easy to get, right? And you can fix the leak just like you did the last one!"
Moxxie's eye twitched. "...Very well, sir. There's also the matter of the water pipe leak in the break room."
"I thought I said to put a bucket under that!" Blitz said.
"I did," Moxxie replied. "And I have been emptying that bucket at your order for the past two weeks. But now, the water has effectively rotted through the ceiling, and we're now in need of a new pipe AND new ceiling tiles."
"Oh, for fuck's sake, Mox, I can't hold your hand on this!" Blitz said, beginning to play with his horse again. "So go get some moooooore, and this time don't call such a shitty company that'll give us shit tiles, hm?"
Moxxie's tail coiled tight. "...Fine, Blitz. And then there's the matter of Loona. She has been constantly eating my lunches, sometimes with you involved, and I am tired of spending money to feed YOUR employee."
"Hey, she is more than an employee!" Blitz looked up. "She is family here, and we take care of family!"
"She's YOUR family, Blitz!" Moxxie snapped. "So YOU can take care of her!"
"What, you want her to starve?!" Blitz said.
"That is NOT what I am saying, sir, and you know it!" Moxxie said. "All I am suggesting is-"
"Well, the last time I took your 'suggestions' seriously, Mox, you fucked up and took a week to finish a mission that should've been five minutes!" Blitz barked over him. "And when you 'suggested' that you go after Striker before that, you let him get away, and then he kidnapped ME! So I don't wanna hear you whine about you not getting your way when 'your way' is a bunch'a bullshit, okay?" He waved a hand as he turned back to the horse doll. "So, go do those things, and we'll be square, alright?"
And then something happened to Moxxie's posture. His eyes went reptilian, a snarl like an alligator billowing from his throat as his clenched hands actually tore his paper in half...and then he went still. The thespian's expression went utterly blank, as neutral as it could be, and all of his tensed limbs slowly relaxed. He stared into the middle distance for several seconds, saying nothing, and Blitz took notice, looking up.
"Mox?" He said. "What, you go deaf too? Go take care of that stuff!"
Moxxie's gaze slowly turned to his boss, though his gaze remained a bit unfocused.
"No," He said simply, sounding either bored or apathetic.
There was a tense pause. Blitz sat up at his desk.
"What?" He said. "What'd you say to me, Mox?"
"I said no," Moxxie said in the same, almost bored tone. He reached into his coat and produced a key, the keys Blitz had given to all of them should he be absent for some reason, and tossed them at the larger imp. Blitz fumbled and eventually caught them, looking back up in time to see Moxxie leaving his office.
"Mox?!" Blitz said, running after him. "Mox, you get your ass back here!"
"Moxxie?" Millie said as she saw her husband walk by her without a second thought, his eyes still gazing at nothing as he passed. She got up from her chair and ran over to him, keeping pace.
"Mox?" She tried again, taking his hand. "Hon, what's wrong?"
"Mills, get your fat husband back here!" Blitz said. "He's not walking away from this argument!"
"Argument?" Millie said as her husband opened the door to the lobby and kept going for the front door. "Moxxie, what happened?"
"MOXXIE!" Blitz snapped, bursting out after them. "The fuck're you doing?! You don't walk away when I'm talking!"
Moxxie stopped with his hand on the doorknob. Loona looked up from her phone. Millie came around in front of her husband and cupped his head.
"That's what I thought!" Blitz said. "No tell me what the hell's gotten into you, Moxxie, and then you can get back to work."
Moxxie mumbled something. Millie's eyes widened.
"What'd you say, ya little prick?!" Blitz said. "If you wanna insult me, say it to my face!"
Millie watched her husband close his eyes, then look up at her with a soft expression. They spoke with nothing but their eyes.
"Are you serious?" Millie's eyes said. "Think about this!"
Moxxie put a hand on hers. "There's nothing to think about," His eyes replied. He pulled his hands from her and closed his eyes, and when he opened them again, Millie actually felt a chill at the sheer RAGE burning in them as they shifted into their reptilian glare once more. She stepped to the side as Moxxie's whole body went rigid, and he took a long, harsh breath.
"...I quit," He said.
The room was quiet. Loona shot her dad a concerned look; since the incident with Dobronov, her father and she had gotten better at reading each other. And that statement took her adopted dad off his balance.
Blitz blinked a few times. "I'm sorry, what'd you just say?"
"I said...I quit," Moxxie repeated, growling the words now. "I am done. You can carry on without me."
"What the FUCK?!" Blitz said. "That's it?! You're just gonna walk out 'cause of a few jokes? Oh, boo-hoo, I'm Moxxie, and I can't get a stick out of my ass if it saved my life! Who the fuck is even gonna hire you, huh?! I'm the only one willing to put up with your bullshit!"
Moxxie spun around and slammed a fist against the wall. "And WHO is going to work for YOU, sir, when we're the only ones who put up with YOUR bullshit?!" He suddenly yelled. "Every day it's something new with you! You fuck up the billing, you blow company funds on this stupid GARBAGE," Moxxie swiped the horse toy from Blitz's hand and sent it clattering to the floor, "and you let your asshole daughter run the phones that NEED to be managed to ensure we make MONEY, but say nothing when she spends the whole time on HER phone!"
"Hey!" Loona piped up.
"You're almost a worse leader than I am!" Moxxie ignored her, advancing on Blitz. "You're immature, you're impulsive, you're STUPID, and you're so fucking FULL of yourself that you don't even bother trying to see who you're hurting past your own bloated EGO! And the worst part of it is?!"
Blitz had hit a wall, unable to back up anymore, and Moxxie was now jabbing his finger in his boss' stomach. Loona was staring with wide eyes, and Millie looked downright horrified; she'd never seen her husband like this, not even when her parents had tried to stop them from getting married. This was an anger new to her, and it frightened her to say the least. Even Blitz looked scared. Moxxie glared at the taller imp for a moment, before tears began streaming down his face.
"The worst part is, I was willing to look past it," The thespian said. "Because I thought, deep down in that greedy, selfish heart of yours, that we were friends. That you, in some capacity, respected me. And I respected you because I saw someone who was hurt and trying to cover it." He stepped back. "It's why I even bothered coming to save you from that psycho priest. But what did you say to me? Did I get a thank you? An acknowledgement? Did I even get a playful dig meant to be a compliment in disguise?" He bit his lower lip a bit. "No. You just insulted me for my choice of bringing MY best arsenal." He leaned in close again.
"Millie and I almost DIED, covering YOUR ass," He snarled. "And I thought we meant something to you. Well, maybe Millie does, but I can tell now that you don't give a SHIT about me. So I'm not putting up with it anymore." He pivoted and stomped to the door, ripping it open and looking over his shoulder.
"Have a nice day, Blitz," He spat. "And best of luck finding a replacement."
With that, he slammed the door behind him, hard enough to shatter the glass pane, and left the other three in silence. Millie gave no second thought to chasing after her husband, leaving Loona to look at her dad, who had tears running in rivers down his cheeks.
"...Dad?" She said.
Blitz didn't respond. All he could do was stare at where the two other imps had left, and feel his stomach drop out somewhere in the next Ring.