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This might singlehandedly be the best or worst decision Mark had ever made in his entire life.
And he admits he’s made his fair share of stupid decisions over the years (like the time Haechan dared him to drink the milk that’s been pushed to the back of their fridge for months while they were half drunk on an empty stomach. Or that one time Jeno convinced him they could play Overwatch still stay awake for all their classes). All terribly questionable decisions, but he thinks this one takes the cake.
This, being Renjun going down on him at a Halloween party, of all places. In their friend's bedroom.
Now, this wouldn’t be a problem if not for two things.
One, Renjun is Jaemin's ex. Extremely recent. On and off exes who still decided to remain friends (if remaining friends included the occasional dick appointment).
And two, Mark is friends with both of them. And not just friends you occasionally see once every few months. They’re in the same friend group—Mark can guarantee that he sees Jaemin and Renjun more times a week than he sees his own roommate. And although they’re all good friends and Renjun and Jaemin are definitely broken up, he doubts Jaemin is ecstatic at the thought of Mark being 3 seconds away from coming in his ex-boyfriend’s mouth.
It’s an awful idea.
Just plain disrespectful and it breaks the bro code on so many levels. (That, and because Mark is kind of scared of Jaemin. Just a little. But it’s mostly awful because he respects the bro code).
He only realises there’s a third, additional problem once the door shut behind them and Renjun was pushing him against it. This bedroom belonged to Jaemin. Great. The guilt is going to eat him alive.
Still, Mark feels the need to plead his case on why he isn’t a shitty friend (to himself really, and maybe to God), but truthfully he can’t think of anything past the feeling of Renjun’s tongue on his cock.
It absolutely does not help that Renjun is looking up at him with those eyes. The kind that Mark has fantasised about for months when he’s had to sit across from him and Jaemin during hangouts.
Mark doesn’t have a crush on Renjun. Technically speaking. Because that would make him an awful friend—which he isn’t (a voice that sounds eerily similar to Donghyuck’s reminds him he also has his cock in Renjun’s mouth right now).
Mark is just not blind. Renjun is conventionally attractive. Everything about him is gorgeous. From his pretty face to his itty bitty waist. This Mark has known that from the very start.
But Renjun is also so much more than that. He fits perfectly in Mark’s arms. Can hold hour long conversations about the most mundane things with his sweet voice. He shies away from affection often even when he’s desperate for it. Renjun has the face of someone that belongs at the front of magazines but he’s humble enough to blush when he’s told so. Everything about him drives Mark just a little crazy.
So it’s not a crush, per se, but Mark is not delusional enough to deny that he’s thought about the idea of Renjun in his bed maybe once or twice.
This is not to say that Mark’s been waiting to jump his bones every time they meet. Really, there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation that led him to what Donghyuck has only described to him as being dickmatised.
It all starts with a Halloween party. Specifically, this one that’s being thrown in the sweltering heat of mid-August. It’s Jeno and Jaemin’s party, so unsurprisingly, it originally starts with only the seven of them. Until Donghyuck decides to let it be known that he had invited about half the campus.
Mark doesn’t really get why it’s a Halloween themed party, though. Something about de-stressing post exam week and having too much free time on their hands now. He thinks it’s actually an excuse to annoy their noisy upstairs neighbour they’ve been complaining about for months now. But he’s just happy he’ll get to put the Spiderman costume he thrifted to some use. Even if he does have to wear it again in October.
Funny enough, Renjun doesn’t get there until an hour into the party. His excuse was lab work that went over his usual class time. But Mark couldn’t hear a thing he said past his costume. It’s nothing special really. A pair of grey cat ear clip-ons with a boring black top that’s a little too tight around his chest and waist. His sharp features only help accentuate the costume.
It’s probably a little pathetic to the average person. To Mark, it feels like the start of something unexpectedly familiar. That heat that begins to warm his gut.
For a lack of a better way to describe it, Renjun looks so fucking hot. Mark wants to bend him in ways he’s not even sure were humanly possible.
When teased about it by Donghyuck, Renjun—red in the face, from annoyance and embarrassment—explained that it was the only thing he could find on such short notice.
And over the next hour or so, he would catch Mark staring at him across the room, then the kitchen and then again from the couch.
But it wasn’t like Renjun was being subtle either. Mark has been around him enough times when he’s drunk to know all his habits, but he’s never been around Renjun when he’s like this—at least not with all his attention on him. The only other time he’s seen Renjun act like this was around Jaemin. And that was only the first few months of their relationship before things started going downhill.
Throughout the night, he gets increasingly aware of everything Renjun says or does. He laughs a little too hard at all of Mark’s jokes, his hands are all over him—in Mark’s hair, across his shoulder, on his thighs—he even pulls out the occasional Mark hyuuung that makes him weak in the knees.
So this is how they end up like this—with Mark pushed against Jaemin’s study table while the party is still going strong outside. If he could focus on anything else other than Renjun’s hand attached to his hip and his pretty pink lips wrapped around him, Mark would probably be able to make out Donghyuck’s faint Chug! Chug! Chug!
But he’s a little preoccupied at the moment.
Renjun takes a second to breathe when he pulls off Mark with a pop. His lips are slicked with spit that it almost looks like lipgloss. Shit, Mark might be a little too into that.
“Did you lock the door?”
The response Mark gives him is anything but intelligent. “Uhh,”
Not that it matters because Renjun has his mouth back on him almost instantly and the guilt that weighed him down earlier evaporates into thin air, diffusing between the smell of Jaemin’s eucalyptus scented candle heated in the corner of the room. It sucks that he can’t even bury his hand in Renjun’s pretty brown hair because he doesn’t want to accidentally knock the cat ears off his head. The way it bobs back and forth along with Renjun’s head makes him want to die. Just a little.
Renjun takes his time licking the underside of his cock before darting his tongue out against the slit. It causes Mark to hit his head on the wall behind him when he throws his head back—knuckles white from gripping the edge of the table.
“Renjun,” he grasps out, almost breathless. It’s a little more than embarrassing.
It’s not like Mark’s a virgin. He’s had plenty of sex. So a standard blowjob shouldn’t feel this good. But it’s from Renjun. And somehow, just the thought of him on his knees is enough to make Mark’s toes curl.
“Mm?” Renjun asks as he looks back up at him with his brown eyes. His hum sends electric vibrations down Mark’s spine.
“I’m really close,”
“Do you want to come on my face or in my mouth?”
As much as the thought of Renjun wanting him to come on his face makes his knees buckle a little, they’re still at a party. And the only thing separating them and the rest of the campus is a thin wall.
“Is it okay if I do it in your mouth?”
It was a genuine question, but Renjun seems to have taken that as a challenge. His hand, which was previously resting on Mark’s hip, reached up to tug at his cock before he took him in deeper. Deep enough, Mark almost started panicking when his nose brushed just below his stomach.
The orgasm hits seconds later like flashes of lightning when he feels himself hit the back of Renjun’s tight throat. He comes with a gargled moan of Renjun’s name on the edge of his lips—bit back by the need to keep quiet.
Warmth envelopes his dick quickly before Renjun pulls off with a pop, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. He barely gives Mark any time to catch his breath before he’s pushing their mouths against each other again—bitter and sticky. Mark can’t tell if it’s gross or hot that he can taste himself on Renjun’s tongue (hot).
He lets himself melt into the kiss as they clumsily stumble in place to fit into each other. Mark’s hand on Renjun’s ass, under his shirt. Renjun’s palm stroking his cock as if Mark isn’t hard again already.
“Renjun,” he whispers, unwillingly desperate from where he’s kissing his neck. He groans at a particularly hard squeeze. His head feels like it’s swimming.
Somehow between making out and lazy handjobs, they’ve manoeuvred themselves just right against Jaemin’s bed.
“I know. It’s okay, hyung.” Renjun licks against his mouth. His smile is a little too blinding. He hasn’t stopped stroking Mark’s dick this whole time. Is it possible to die from being so turned on? “I know you want to fuck me.”
It’s the truth, but Mark feels the need to apologise anyway. He’s not sure for what exactly. (He probably owes Jaemin one too). “I’m sorry,”
“Don’t be. I’ve known for a while now.”
Mark wants to question what he means by that when Renjun finally lets him go to wrap both his arms around Mark’s shoulders. He kisses him deep and sloppy—like he hasn’t been kissed in years. Renjun nibbles on his bottom lip—pulling on it between his teeth before they break apart for air.
When he pulls back, Mark takes him in properly.
His hair is a mess and the cat ears are only slightly crooked now. There are still remnants of dried tears clumping his lashes together and the flush on his cheeks have not faded, if anything Renjun looks like he’s blushing twice as hard. Whatever makeup he had earlier has been completely wiped off his face now. All there is is a trail of spit on his chin, right below his swollen lips.
He looks like an absolute mess. Mark has never wanted anyone more in his entire life.
“You can fuck me.”
Mark really needs to stop allowing himself to think with his dick. But he’s accepted his fate. He was doomed the moment Renjun walked through the front door with those cat ears and that tight top (possibly even long before that).
He knows he should protest. At least put up some fight even when he knows the outcome is certain because Mark has never been very good at denying Renjun what he wants.
Renjun must have caught onto his hesitation when he pulled away slightly. This time the peachy tone of his cheeks are genuine—he’s actually embarrassed. And it makes Mark want to devour him whole.
“Do you not want–”
He does. Mark wants so bad, he doesn’t think he can look Jaemin in the eye ever again.
He pushes their mouths together with just as much vigour as before until Renjun’s back hits the mattress. They don’t part for air aside from quick gasps. Most of them caused by wandering hands. Renjun is caught off-guard, pleasantly.
Mark is already half naked with his costume pooling around his ankles, so he makes quick work to remove them before he has his mouth back on any part of Renjun he could reach. His cock rests heavy against his thigh.
“Mark,” a whine pierces through the air when his hand begins palming Renjun’s nipples through his shirt. It’s so thin, he can feel every ridge and curve brushing up against his own chest. Renjun is so small underneath him, it makes him dizzy just thinking about it.
“What happened to Mark hyung?”
“That’s only when you’re nice to me.” The way Renjun frowns only fuels the fire in his gut even more. “Can you touch me?”
“I am though.”
He leaves a kiss in the juncture between Renjun’s neck and his shoulder.
The strain in Renjun’s voice is evident. “I meant properly.”
He’s cute even when he’s not trying to be.
Mark kisses him down to his stomach, through the thin fabric, before he’s pushing Renjun’s pants down with ease. His cock fits into his hand, heavier than he had expected. The knowledge does nothing to calm him down. Mark really likes everything about him.
The gasp that escapes Renjun’s mouth makes him feel like the skin is melting off his bones. He can’t stop staring at the wrinkles forming between Renjun’s brows, like he’s contemplating between groaning or keeping quiet enough not to get caught.
He only takes a break between muffled pants to tell Mark to grab the lube and condoms from the bottom drawer.
And Mark only takes a moment to think of how familiar Renjun has to be in Jaemin’s bed to know that.
He makes quick work of stretching Renjun out, as if he isn’t desperate for it himself. One finger, and then two, then three. The music outside thumps to the beat of his fingers disappearing past Renjun’s rim. Mark doesn’t stop to watch his expression—he’s far too occupied at how easy Renjun opens up for him. Like he’s made for this.
“Don’t stop,” he says, in a shuddering breath. His feet are planted into the mattress and he grinds his hips everytime Mark reaches a spot inside him. So he does it again. And again. Until Renjun bites back a scream when his tongue teases against his entrance. Tantalisingly slow. It slides in easily, working in tandem with the rest of his fingers.
“Hyung, please.”
“Getting close?”
Instead of an answer, he finds Renjun’s hand buried in his hair—pulling at his roots to keep him exactly where he is. Like he’s annoyed Mark even entertained the thought of breathing.
When he’d left his apartment this morning with his Spiderman costume in his backpack (because he wasn’t about to walk around in it in the middle of August), he didn’t think he’d end the night with Renjun in bed. Especially not while there’s an active party outside.
Not that Mark was complaining. In fact, he’d pinch himself if Renjun’s grip on his hair wasn’t already sobering enough.
Mark only stops when Renjun tells him he’s close between clenched teeth.
Then he kisses his way back up, peeling the top off so he’s completely naked by the time their lips meet. Tentatively, he decides to leave the cat ears on, because of course he does. They continue to turn him on more (if that was even possible).
When Renjun’s hand reaches up to remove them himself, Mark works faster than he does and catches his wrist—slicked fingers.
“Actually, can you keep them on? For me?”
“What, the ears?”
“Haha, yeah. Is that okay?”
Renjun is looking at him like he’s trying to figure out if there’s something wrong with him, or trying to decide whether he finds it pathetic or sexy. Mark hopes it’s sexy.
“God, you’re worse than him. You really wanna fuck me with cat the ears on?”
“Yeah?” He says, like it’s a question. Because duh, who wouldn’t want to fuck Renjun with cat ears on? And then he says it again, more convincing this time. “Yes.”
He can tell Renjun is getting work up because he doesn’t bother saying anything else—only takes Mark’s fingers like he’s been for it waiting all night (he probably has).
He takes it so well that even Mark’s hand starts to cramp up. Renjun is stretched well enough to take him and then some. The thought is enough to make him groan. His mind wanders to how good Renjun could take him. If he’d beg or whine. Try to keep quiet between clenched jaws and red-bitten lips. If he could take more than what Mark can offer. If he already has.
“Hyung, if you don’t fuck me in the next five seconds, I’ll find someone else who will.” Renjun snaps him out of it, his voice coming back shaky. All bark, no bite. But it sounds less like a threat and more like a promise.
Mark doesn’t need to be told twice. Renjun’s bare legs are wrapped around his waist by the time the condom is rolled onto his dick. His hands sit perfectly around Renjun’s waist (while he’s trying not to think too much about how small it feels in his hands). Then he’s pushing a leg up before sinking into him with ease.
Mark has shamefully fantasised about this very moment a million different times. He’s thought about Renjun over him. Under him. Thought about the faces he’d make or the sounds he would let out.
Nothing comes nearly as close to the real thing.
The head of his cock pushes past the entrance and the first thing Mark notices is the searing heat that envelopes him completely. It’s almost suffocating, the way Renjun takes him.
The second thing he notices is everything else. The throb in his lower back. The intense weight in his gut. Renjun’s mouth parting in a perfect circle to let out a shudder. Mark kisses him on the mouth, on his cheeks, on his eyelids. It’s all so much and not enough at the same time.
So, he pushes in bit by bit, once Renjun has caught his breath. He lets him dig his nails into his shoulders when it feels like too much. (Like he would when Mark teased him about typos in their group chat or mispronouncing dishes, except this feels less playful and more like Renjun is trying to carve his name into his skin).
Every feeling intensifies by a thousand times when he finally bottoms out.
“Fuck,”
Renjun mutters something in Mandarin that sounds too close to a curse word he uses around Chenle. Mark honestly can’t think of anything besides being inside him.
“Is this good?”
“So good,” Renjun’s reply comes back a little breathless, pleasure coated around his lips. With his hair pushed against the mattress like this, it forms a little halo around his head that makes him look like an angel. The glow underneath his skin only makes him look more angelic.
Back then, Mark could only think of kissing Renjun the way he wanted to. Now, he does it without a second thought.
“Tell me when I can move.”
“You can move.”
And Mark thought he was desperate. “You’re sure?”
Renjun’s frown returns instantly. It only makes Mark want to piss him off even more just to see it. “Hyung, please.”
Well, that. Who is Mark to deny him when he asks him so nicely?
He pulls back and thrusts into him hard enough to carve a space inside him. Renjun doesn’t bother to bite down on his tongue to stifle his moan. His leg tightens around Mark’s torso like he’s barely breaking a sweat and it makes him think about the time Renjun once told him he did gymnastics in high school.
Naturally, Mark does what any sane person would do and puts it to the test. He pushes Renjun’s legs higher up, practically folding him in half and watches the way his body twists underneath his hands with ease. It’s dizzying, how much Renjun drives him a little crazy all at once.
His fake cat ears jump with every thrust. Brushing against the mattress—up and down, up and down, like they’re turning away by instinct.
Mark fucks him like he means it. Like he deserves it.
“Don’t stop.” Renjun gasps, like he’s used up all the air in the room. It would explain why Mark can hardly feel any in his own lungs. The pace he sets is brutal from the start and the fire burning in the pit of his stomach needs to be satiated. “There-uh, right there.”
“Fuck, you’re–” His sentence is cut short at the feeling of nails dragging down his back. “Injun, you’re so perfect.”
The name slips past him without a second thought. He doesn’t exactly know where he gets the urge to call him that, especially when Jaemin was always the only person to use it. But that was before they broke up. Ever since then, Donghyuck throws the name around casually when he’s teasing. Even Jeno uses it when he’s trying to bribe a favour out of Renjun. It should be entertained as nothing but a slip of the tongue.
Renjun doesn’t seem to share the same sentiment.
He takes a moment to tear his gaze away from the ceiling to look Mark in the eyes. His voice is still breathless, lilting like flames licking the edge of a furnace. His tone is not so warm. “Don’t call me that.”
It manages to sober up Mark only slightly.
This is Renjun. Jaemin’s ex. The same Jaemin he’s been friends with since high school. The one he’s almost certain is still in love with Renjun.
This is entirely fucked up on Mark’s part. He practically invented the bro code.
He’s not ashamed to admit that he’s done some crazy shit for his friends before—drove Donghyuck two and a half hours out of the city to hook up with someone, pretended to be Jisung so he could take a paper in his place when he was out sick, sat with Renjun for hours after his break up with Jaemin (even when he promised it was mutual).
Fucking his friend’s ex-boyfriend though, might just undo all that.
And yet, he can’t stop.
There’s something addicting about wanting something you can’t really have. At least not completely. He can have Renjun in little doses like this—have him laugh at his jokes, watch him drape his limbs over him, fuck him into the mattress until his voice is raw. But he can’t have him in a way that matters.
Watching him like this, it’s impossible not to have his mind wander a little. When Renjun digs his heels into his back and mewls, Mark wonders if this is what Jaemin sees too.
Do they hold hands when they fuck? Do Renjun’s fingers dig into Jaemin’s shoulders the way they do right now? Does he nibble on his bottom lip when Jaemin hits it just right?
Mark has only walked in on them once and it was completely by accident. Coincidentally, it was another Halloween party (a real one). It was a bathroom (he’s starting to question Renjun’s timing with these things now) and he didn’t see much past Jaemin’s pants on the floor, but he’d heard them. Renjun’s voice has always been pretty. He sounds prettier when he’s trying to keep it in. (Mark thinks, distantly, this might’ve been where his interest in Renjun started).
He gets pulled back into reality when Renjun brings him down for a kiss. His eyes are glossed over, lips a little swollen. He’s pretty, in ways the world doesn’t even deserve.
“I’m close. Are you?”
Mark thinks he’s been close to coming for at least ten minutes now. “Yeah. Yeah, baby, I’m close.”
Renjun doesn’t comment on the pet name. He only pulls Mark closer, either out of embarrassment or guilt. Maybe both. Renjun is holding onto him so tight, like he’s afraid he might come faster than Mark would.
He manages to read between the lines when he reaches for Renjun’s cock between them—red at the tip from having brushed between them so much. Everything about Renjun.
Somewhere between the crude faster, harder and right there’s, the door knob jiggles. And then muffled voices appear of from the other side.
“Fuck, it’s locked.”
“I still need a charger, Jeno. How the fuck am I gonna take his number if my phone is dead?” Donghyuck’s strained voice pierces through the door and the music, impressively. Well, there’s that question answered.
Renjun seems to be on edge too—clenched around him so tightly that Mark starts to wonder if it’s possible to suffocate through your own dick. But the look Renjun gives him tells him enough: If you stop now, you’re dead to me.
“It’s Jaemin’s room, what do you want me to do?”
Right now, Mark wants both of them to dive off the edge of a cliff if it means he gets to come in the next three seconds. He can barely contain himself from thrusting into Renjun, let alone control his voice. But it’s not like Renjun is making an effort to keep all that quiet either.
He whimpers every time Mark so much as lowers his pace. It would be insignificant, if it were anyone else, but this is Renjun. And Mark notices everything about him. Like the way he’s squirming under him, despite being acutely aware of the presence of their friends outside. Is Renjun… into this?
Mark pulls out halfway before pushing cock back into him and then Renjun’s back is arching off the bed at an angle that makes waist look even smaller in Mark’s hands. His body follows with compliance when Mark pushes him back down by his hips, only to do it all over again.
Oh. He’s really into this. Renjun is so, so close and Mark is right behind him.
He has to put a palm over Renjun’s mouth when he moans a little too loud once Mark finds that spot again. Well, not that it matters now. There’s no way Jeno and Donghyuck didn’t hear that.
They wait with bated breath as the silence lingers outside.
And then Jeno is speaking up, his disdain evident through the wall separating them. “I’m not telling Jaemin someone is fucking in his room. He’s already annoyed that you invited this many people.”
Donghyuck’s whiny reply is muffled beyond comprehension as they move further away.
It only takes a second for Renjun to lock eyes with him when they’re gone—so close, so desperate, so deserving—and Mark fucks him in earnest once, twice, four more times until he feels the pleasure flood into his bloodstream.
When Renjun comes, he’s moaning his name between clenched teeth. His fingers create new divots in Mark’s skin where there weren’t before. The squeeze makes him unbearably lightheaded.
He only stops moving when Renjun taps the back of his shoulder with a whine, complaining that it’s too much and that he needs to change back to catch a ride home with Chenle.
Mark doesn’t know how he’s dug a grave this deep in the span of an hour.
He watches, leaning against the headboard as Renjun shuffles across the room for tissues and a clean pair of underwear. It fits him perfectly when he slides into them and then back into his tight, black top. The cat ears are also clipped back into place—albeit slightly more crooked than before. Renjun is almost decent if not for the marks on his neck.
There are a lot of things Mark finds addicting about Renjun, but above all, it’s this:
Renjun turned back to look at him, his smile overtaken by his brown eyes and red cheeks. A thunderstorm in mid-summer. “Don’t tell Jaemin about this, hyung.” It comes off more like a warning than a joke. “He might just kill you.”
Mark thinks, solemnly, not if the guilt beats him to it.