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The weather was still brisk, and even the heavy knit of Akechi’s tights did little to keep her warm. She huddled deeper into her coat as she waited outside the train station. Akechi contemplated heading back down the stairs and getting something warm to drink—even if the cheap coffee never compared to Leblanc’s—but she didn’t have the time. The guy agreed to meet up with her at five, and she didn’t want miss him. She looked down at her phone, 4:59 in large numbers on the screen.
She didn’t know exactly who she was looking for. Even if she’d had a photo of her face on the app, he’d been nothing more than a torso. A well-muscled torso, but a torso nonetheless. Hopefully everything else is just as good, she thought to herself.
If everything else wasn’t though, she would manage. She’d had underwhelming hook-ups before. The possibility of disappointment came with meeting new men, but Akechi delighted in the thrill of having her expectations succeeded. During her last encounter she’d been nearly folded in half as the guy took his time shoving larger and larger vibrators in her ass. That had been exhilarating.
“Akechi…?”
She looked up from her phone, and her heart froze in her chest. The man that approached her looked older than he had the last time she’d seen him. Streaks of silver glimmered in his beard, and the crow’s feet that framed his eyes were deeper. But he still had that same imposing stature. That same scalp shorn smooth. Those same glasses with the light-filtering lenses that Akechi had always found obnoxious.
“Shido,” Akechi said. She’d known that he’d been released early from prison—some claim about good behavior, but more likely about the power that Shido had once held, that same power many of his former allies still held—but had never made the attempt to see him. Like much of her childhood, she’d wanted her days at his beck and call to stay buried.
Her mouth struggled to work as a flurry of words spun around in her mind. She had so many things she wanted to say to him. Or, rather, scream at him.
But then she shook her head and scattered away the chaos of her thoughts. “You can’t be here,” Akechi said as she stepped away from him. “I’m waiting for someone.”
Gossamer wisps of breath trailed into the air as Shido huffed. “I know,” he replied. “I’m the one that’s been messaging you.”
Akechi’s grip tightened around her phone, and the plastic case creaked in protest.. “You were messaging me?” she demanded. Shibuya faded from her vision, with only Shido standing before her, like a pinprick of light in an ink-dark sea. “Why were you messaging me?”
Shido’s gaze softened, and Akechi despised it. That expression reminded her of how the Phantom Thieves had changed his heart—how the man he’d once been was nothing more than a ghost. Just like Akechi wanted to keep her history with Shido in her past, she also wanted to keep her history with the Phantom Thieves forgotten.
More specifically, she wanted her time with Ren to remain lost. After everything she’d done to him, no matter how much he’d obviously adored her, the least she could do was let him live his life without her around to provide complication after complication.
Shido turned from Akechi and jerked his head toward the street. “Come on,” he said. “You don’t want to air our dirty laundry out in public, do you?”
She didn’t, so she quickly fell in stride with Shido. “You’re going to tell me what the hell you’re doing,” she warned. Shido didn’t seem phased by her anger. He just smirked.
“I know, I know,” he answered. Akechi’s boots had low heels, and with them she found they were about the same height. They clicked upon the sidewalk as Akechi and Shido left the station for a nearby residential area. Apartments towered around them. The two walked in relative silence as the crowds of Shibuya tapered into a small trickle. Only the occasional pedestrian passed them.
Akechi glanced over at Shido. He hadn’t looked at her since they left the station, and tension wafted around them like dense smoke.
Eventually Shido guided her to an apartment complex. Fancy, she thought. It was the exact sort of thing she associated with Shido. The old Shido. In an odd way she felt comforted by the apartment’s presence, as though it parted the knowledge that, despite everything that had transpired over the years, Shido was in many ways still Shido. They took the building’s elevator to the top floor, and Shido guided her into an apartment far larger than the quaint studio she called home.
Even though she’d said nothing during the entire walk, her voice returned once the door shut with a sharp click. “Okay, time’s up,” Akechi started. “We’re alone now, so tell me what’s going on?”
Shido slipped his shoes off and motioned for Akechi to do the same. “I was looking for you,” he said as he took his coat off. He offered to take Akechi’s as well, but she refused. She kept her hands in her pockets as she stood in the entryway. Shido didn’t press the issue, but he still shook his head as he walked away from her. “I’m getting a drink.”
Akechi’s frown deepened as she resentfully followed him. “What, on a hook-up app?” she asked, disgust seeping into her voice.
The bottle of whiskey that Shido produced looked expensive, and he poured it into two glasses. “No, that was just a coincidence,” he answered. He handed one of the glasses to Akechi. “Can’t say it’s a bad coincidence though.” His gaze lingered on Akechi even as she took the glass. She could feel him staring the column of her neck as it disappeared and reappeared beneath her hair. Could feel him taking in the curves of her legs in her tights, the glimpse of skin between her gloves and the cuffs of her coat.
A tired grumble left Akechi. “Don’t be weird,” she said.
“You weren’t bothered back then.”
Akechi twirled the glass and watched the whiskey form lazy spirals. The setting sun peered in through the kitchen window and bathed everything in orange light. Even after her repeated excursions in his Palace, with all of its golden excess, the color she associated with Shido was orange. It was the color of risk, and Shido was always been a man that needed his own warning label.
If he’d had one then Akechi might never have fucked him to begin with.
She probably would have anyway, but she liked to think she wouldn’t have.
She’d fucked him for what scant attention she could get. Dragging herself through the dregs of the collective unconscious hadn’t been enough to keep Shido focused on her. She’d needed more from him, so she’d offered her body as well.
Akechi really had offered him so much.
At least he’d been a surprisingly enjoyable lover, even if he hadn’t been Ren.
Akechi took a sip of the whiskey, expecting a miserable burn that traveled all the way down her throat, but the liquor was smooth. The heat that greeted her was gentle as it spread throughout her body and chased away the winter chill that still lingered. Shido watched her as he took a deep drink of his own whiskey. The taste seemed inconsequential to him.
“I have a question first,” Shido said, and he gestured to Akechi. To her heeled boots at the entryway and leather purse on the counter and false lashes fluttering over her eyes. “What’s with the get-up?”
Akechi frowned and glanced away from Shido. “You saw my profile, didn’t you?” she asked. “You already know.”
Shido didn’t answer right away, and the light reflected off his glasses, rendering his gaze unreadable. The silence was miserable, and Akechi wanted to force her way into Shido’s skull to see what the man was thinking. She wanted to know what emotions were rolling around in that perverse mind—if Shido was digusted. Or, worse, if he was resigned.
But then Shido replied, slowly and cautiously, “You look like your mother.”
The comment hurt like a knife to Akechi’s chest. Her feelings for her mother were, as always, a barely healed scar. The last thing Akechi needed to hear was Shido comparing her to her mother. “Don’t say that,” she hissed. “Don’t even mention her.”
“Even if it’s true?” Shido asked. He sat his drink down on the counter as he rubbed his beard. “Hm, but you looked like her back then too. You didn’t take after your old man at all. Well… except when you get that pissy look on your face. Like you do now, actually.”
Akechi bit back a growl. “Your heart might have changed, but looks like you still know how to get under my skin.” She didn’t flinch when Shido cupped her face with one large hand and ran his rough thumb over her cheekbone. Her grip tightened on the glass, and she could hear the groan of her leather gloves. When he was this close she could smell his cologne intermingling with the phantom trace of his preferred cigarette brand.
She didn’t respond immediately when Shido kissed her. Akechi wanted to hold onto her anger. She wanted to let it grow into an inferno and reduce Shido to ash when he touched her. “Come on,” he murmured against her lips. “Don’t you want to be your papa’s good little girl like you used to be?”
Akechi didn’t think she wanted to be. If anything, she found it cruel for Shido to slither his way back into her life while Ren only existed as memories. As Shido picked her up and sat her on the counter she thought of that boy she once knew—not the man currently handling her as though she was a doll. Her glass disappeared from her hand, and Shido lips returned. She acquiesced to his growing hunger with an agitated huff. She felt his hands on her coat, unfastening the buttons.
Sometimes Akechi let herself dream about what would happen if she sought Ren after so many years apart. She imagined walking to her apartment after a long day of work, and he would be in the kitchen, smelling of coffee and curry. He would smile as he recognized her, even after all the years and changes between them. Sometimes in those dreams he would kiss her the way she wished he’d kissed her the night before they confronted Dr. Maruki.
She ached for the reality contained in those dreams, even if Shido’s hands felt pleasant and warm as they slipped past her coat and under her dress. Shido grabbed at her thighs, spreading them apart. “You look cute,” Shido remarked. “All dressed up and flustered, and it’s all for me.”
He sounded so smug. Guess I’m getting to see all the limitations of a change of heart, Akechi thought as she leaned back. Shido’s mouth was hot as it moved along Akechi’s neck, and the scrape of his teeth against her skin made her gasp. His hand found the soft bulge in his panties and squeezed. “But I think I would rather see you in nothing at all.” His voice was deepened by arousal, and as he pressed up against her she could feel his growing erection.
Akechi wondered if it would feel as amazing as she remembered.
They were both panting when Shido finally hoisted her off the counter. Akechi tangled her limbs around him, feeling like a child as he carried her through the apartment. Shadows extended to the ceiling as the sunset yielded to night. Her hand curled around the back of his neck, and the familiarity of Shido’s body against hers gave her pause. It was comforting despite everything.
Shido shrugged his way past the bedroom door, and he laid Akechi down upon the vastness of his bed. “I think your bed alone is the size of my apartment,” she joked, but any other words were snuffed out by another consuming kiss. When he pulled away she was rendered breathless in the way she’d always wanted from Ren.
“I’ve missed you,” Shido told her. He unfastened the buttons of her dress with a care that he’d never exhibited before. A younger Shido would have torn her dress from her body like it was wrapping paper. Akechi focused on his hands, not wanting to consider his words. She didn’t want him to miss her. She didn’t want him to be attached.
The chill of the apartment ghosted over Akechi’s skin, but she felt as though she was being set ablaze with how Shido touched her.
“I forgot you had freckles.” Shido cupped her covered breasts appreciatively. He’d never seen them before and seemed enraptured. His thumbs swept over the exposed skin above her bra and along the constellation of freckles. He saw patterns in them that she was certain no one else saw.
Perhaps he saw the constellation Gemini, or the wing of Corvus. Or Shido might be seeing constellations of his own design. A gun freshly fired, or a cruise ship moving through the flooded ruins of Tokyo.
Akechi’s hair haloed itself around her head as she tilted her head to watch Shido. “With as sentimental you’re being I’m surprised you forgot anything about me,” she said. She earned an amused rumble for her remark.
He undid the clasp to her bra—a delicate garment of white eyelet—and revealed the swell of her breasts. Fingers squeezed at the flesh and tugged at the nipples. The noises that left Akechi were soft, breathy things. She bit down upon one of her knuckles to muffle the sounds, but Shido immediately admonished her. “I want to hear you,” he said. “I haven’t got to hear you in so long.”
So Akechi complied. It was such a simple request, and her voice echoed off the bedroom’s high ceiling. All the while she wanted to scold him for the affection that informed his actions. She wasn’t oblivious. He wanted to fuck her, but he wanted it as a prelude to a romance.
That romance was impossible. Akechi opened her mouth to say as much, but then his mouth latched onto one of her nipples, and she sobbed out a moan instead. His mouth was wonderfully hot, and his tongue was like velvet upon her nipple.
Her body ached with a responding desire, and despite the resolve she’d wanted to display she found herself hungering for Shido. She wanted more of his mouth, just as she wanted his cock.
She also found herself frustrated by Shido’s shirt. Akechi pawed at it and took fistfuls of the garment into her hands. She wanted to feel his body without the inconvenience of clothes between them. If Shido noticed her agitation he didn’t acknowledge it. His tongue laved over her nipples before rolling the them between his teeth. Her whines became increasingly desperate as he tormented her, and when she looked down she was greeted by her nipples flushing a sore, tender red.
“You’re being too rough,” she protested. Shido hummed an answer, and the resulting vibration was painful against her nipples. But he relented as she continued her plea, pressing an apologetic kiss to her chest.
“My poor girl,” Shido said. He sat up, and he made quick work of divesting his shirt. The photo of his muscled body was, after all, the reason why Akechi had agreed to meet up with Shido, so she savored the sight of his broad chest.
Akechi sat up to touch him. Her fingers brushed over the contours of his chest and abdomen. The dusting of hair above the waist of his trousers caught her attention, and she delighted in way Shido’s breath hitched as she tugged at them. Being able to pull little responses such as that was one of the things she enjoyed about sex. Men all had their little quirks, but she had a knack for figuring out what they despised and what they enjoyed. She developed a familiarity with their bodies in brief amounts of time.
And she’d been with Shido before, for much longer than a quick encounter, so she knew what fed his desires. “You can make it up to me by fucking me into your mattress,” she said. “I know what you’ve really been wanting is to fuck my ass until I can’t think straight.”
Shido’s breath hitched, and Akechi’s heart fluttered with a consequent excitement. “I’ll make sure you can’t even get up afterward,” he promised. He yanked down her tights and panties with a force that made her worried she’d find runs in the tights, but before she could say anything he shoved her back onto the bed. He peeled her bare, with only her gloves left as he towered before her. She clenched her fists to savor the feel of the leather.
“I always loved seeing you in gloves,” Shido remarked as he undid his trousers. “You looked like the murderer you were, even as you ran around doing that wholesome detective routine for your fans. They thought the gloves were just a fashion choice, but I knew better.”
His cock was exactly as Akechi remembered it—imposing and with a leftward tilt that she would have found adorable on any other cock. It was majestic. Even before the years of estrogen Akechi’s own cock had never matched the grandeur of Shido’s.
Akechi waggled her fingers. “I don’t kill people anymore,” she told him as she spread her legs in invitation. “I work at a university.”
Shido crawled on top of her. “You really have changed then,” he said. He reached over to the nightstand, and he fished a bottle of lube from the drawer. Akechi flinched from the chill as Shido smeared the gel around her anus. He dipped his finger into her opening, and she sighed as her body yielded with a scant resistance.
“Yes,” she breathed. When she left afterward she would be ravaged by guilt for lying down for her father. Until then she could only gasp and whine as Shido took his time fingering her. Two fingers speared her again and again. He tormented every sensitive spot he discovered.
“You’re so eager,” Shido said. He pressed a third finger into Akechi and bore down upon her prostate. Her nerves sang their delight. She grabbed his shoulders with her gloved hands, as though for stability. Desperate, excited noises escaped her—the language of her arousal unchanged by the years.
Akechi’s fake lashes were already damp with tears when Shido took mercy on her and pushed his cock into her anus. Despite the care he’d displayed she still struggled to accommodate the entirety of his cock. She swore under her breath, and Shido’s laugh echoed in her mind. “Come on,” he encouraged her. “Just a little bit more. You’ve taken me before.”
He pushed deeper into Akechi until his hips were pressed flush against her ass. She felt so full, with her body straining to accommodate the intrusion. When Shido finally moved she wailed in response. His cock rubbed against her prostate—granting moments of white-hot ecstasy between the drawn-out ache—again and again. Shido’s thrusts had started out slow, but he wasted little time increasing his pace. Soon he was hammering into Akechi with reckless abandon.
Akechi buried her face against Shido’s neck. She could feel her cock rub against Shido, sensitive in the way that the rest of her body was. She could barely contain every feeling within her body.
She felt as though she was on the verge of exploding.
And all the while frantic pleas left her, both egging Shido on and begging for his mercy.
“It’s too much…”
“Please, I need it!”
“Fuck, you’re too big.”
Then, in the void she’d built herself, she cried out the wrong name.
“Ren!”
Shido halted immediately—as though he’d been struck. Akechi kept her face pressed against his neck with mortification. She couldn’t meet his gaze. Her mouth moved, but no words matched her lips. The only sound in the bedroom was their heavy breathing. Despite that Akechi didn’t hear their panting. Only the roar of her growing horror resounded around her.
The silence grew unbearably heavy. Ashamed, Akechi started to pull away from Shido, but he grabbed her hips to keep her in place.
The sigh that left him was weary. The sigh of a man denied.
“So you were in love with him,” he commented as he thrust back into her. “I always wondered. Especially when those punks sent their calling card, and you weren’t around.” Shido slammed his cock into Akechi with a force that knocked the breath from her lungs. “I only found out later you were in the hospital.”
Akechi couldn’t respond. Shido was brutal as he fucked her, and she deliriously thought of the man he’d once been. Her hands clawed at his chest helplessly before they collapsed onto the bed beside her head. Whiskey lingered on Shido’s breath as he leaned in close.
“You can have your little crush, but when I’m fucking you I’m the only one you’d better be thinking about.” Shido punctuated his remark with a slap to her thigh. Then Shido was grabbing her cock, pinching and teasing at the slit.
“Shido…” Akechi pleaded. “Please, I. I…”
“That’s the right name,” he said, voice a growl. The sound of his words faltering told Akechi he was on the verge of cumming, and she clenched around his cock to coax his climax from him. A deep moan left him, but he persisted. “What’s my name, Akechi?”
“Shido!” Akechi sobbed. She needed him to cum. She needed to feel his release in the labyrinth of her insides. Feel its warmth spreading through her as she was flung toward her own climax.
The grin on Shido’s face was victorious despite everything. “That’s right.”
Fortunately Akechi only needed to wait another moment. Shido’s teeth grit together as he came. The warmth of his release spread within Akechi, and she responded with her own climax. Her thin, clear cum splashed across Shido’s abdomen in a couple modest spurts.
With that, the fog began to clear. Akechi laid upon the bed, weary from being fucked so thoroughly, but all the while her thoughts returned to her. Shido carefully slipped his cock free from her spent hole, and he laid down beside her. His hand ran down her side soothingly.
Akechi accepted the gesture, but it was too little to keep the shame from consuming her. “I shouldn’t have done this,” she said.
“Why?” Shido asked. He traced the faint outlines of Akechi’s ribs. “Because I’m your father, or because you’re in love with that kid?” When Akechi refused to answer he continued. “Does he even know how you feel? Unless you’ve unlearned a lot of your bullshit while I was in prison I’m going to guess you never told him anything.”
Akechi’s brows knit together into a scowl that made her look more like Shido than she otherwise did. “I’m not taking relationship advice from you,” she snapped. She sat up, and her face twisted into a grimace. “I should have told you to wear a condom. I’m going to feel gross walking home with your cum leaking out.”
Shido watched as she climbed out of bed and set about getting dressed. “You could take a shower,” he said. “Your makeup ran.”
She touched her lips. Her rosy lipstick had smeared into a shapeless mess. But then Akechi frowned, shook her head, and returned to slipping her clothes back on. “I’ll deal with it,” she said. “I can just stop by a bathroom on my way back home.” Once she finished dressing she headed to the door. Only when she reached the doorway did she stop. Shido was about to ask what she was thinking, but she spoke up first.
“After everything I did to him I can’t just walk back into his life and ask for a chance,” Akechi said. She didn’t look back at Shido, but he saw the way her grip on the door frame tightened. “He deserves a happy life. Without his almost murderer in it.”
Shido reached over to his nightstand and grabbed the cigarettes and lighter sitting on top. “Well, if that’s what you want,” he conceded, but he sounded unconvinced by her defense. He didn’t say anything else. It wouldn’t have mattered if he did.
Akechi slipped on her coat, tugged on her boots, and left the apartment of her father. As she stepped back into the wintry chill she thought of him alone in his bedroom, smoking those cigarettes she’d always associated with him.
She buried her face in her coat to hide her ruined makeup, and as she headed back to the station she wondered in Ren was somewhere in Tokyo in his own bed.
Unaware that Itsuko Akechi even existed.