Chapter Text
“I don’t know Chuck, it’s getting kinda late and I am tired. This class absolutely killed me and I still have a fifteen minute walk home from the subway. I’m dead.” your very best friend and companion in weekend mischief whined.
“But Linds, it’s Friday. Just come with me to the Sally Ann, I want to see if I can find something cute and vintage for the party next week. Then we’ll bounce. I pinky swear!”
At Lindsay’s dubious expression, Charlotte made her best attempt at puppy dog eyes and proceeded to beg, “Pupupulease.”
“Is that supposed to be Roger Rabbit? Oh for fucks sake! Fine. Let’s go then.” Lindsay grinned.
After a short trip in an uber the two women walked along Bloor street towards the Salvation Army. It was full of the same old well used fast fashion items Charlotte often saw and nothing caught her eye. Disappointed she started to browse the furniture items for sale.
Maybe I’ll find something nice or even kitschy –that doesn’t have bedbugs, Charlotte thought to herself.
If I knew how expensive it would be refurnish after....everything. Charlotte sighed to herself loudly. With only the timing and ability to read your mind a true friend could possess, Lindsay who had followed her friend’s browsing disinterestedly, said almost admonishing Charlotte “I know how hard it is to rebuild after divorce Chuck. You should have kept some things though. Didn’t he say to take the bed and sofa?” with a long suffering sigh of someone clearly tired of the same discussion, because it was in fact a discussion often repeated after Charlotte left her husband of 8 years with the intention of a clean slate. A foolish decision, Lindsay thought angrily. Jeff was never good enough for her, and after doing her best to build a home for them, paid most of the bills, bought the lions share of the furniture and helped him through his drug dependency just to cheat on her. Fuck, I hate him. Lindsay glanced at Charlie with concern, love and complete impatience “Ugh, it’s all ugly. Why don’t we go to Ikea or something this weekend and we could--” before Lindsay could finish her sentence Charlotte had exclaimed “Oh Linds! Look at this, I love it!”.
There on the left wall facing out towards the street was an elegant wall length mirror with an elaborate carvings that reminded Lindsay so much of the set design in those Lord of the Rings movies that she was about to declare it before Charlotte interrupted her thoughts.
“It looks like an Eluvian!” Charlotte gasped. At Lindsay’s confused expression, “you remember? From those Dragon Age games?”
“Do you think it’s one of the promotional items before launch?” Lindsay asked.
“I don’t know, I wasn't as big a collector as some people and to be honest Jeff would probably just pawn it if he had the chance. Sorry.” Charlotte glanced back at Lindsay apologetically.
Yet another reason to hate that prick, Lindsay thought but kept it to herself. Charlotte was altogether too kind to him but was thankful of her reluctance to disparage Jeff’s past with addiction and recovery, because it was a past Lindsay shared with Charlotte’s ex-husband.
“No it’s fine. You’re too good Chuck, you’re not wrong.” Lindsay smiled at her, “How much is it? It would look good in your entry even if it isn’t a collectors item.”
Charlotte smiled back at her in silent gratitude for not being offended at her misstep, “Yikes, they want 80 bucks for it. I dunno, I can get something cheaper at ikea if we go. Let’s just go.” Charlotte began to walk past Lindsay dejectedly before Lindsay stopped her with a hand on her friend's shoulder and looked at her, “I’ll buy it for you, babe. I can see you love it. We’ll pay for it now and tomorrow after brunch, where you will buy me Belgian waffles in gratitude, with Nessa’s truck we'll take it back to yours. How does that sound?”
Charlotte laughed, “It sounds like I owe you waffles and a latte for the delivery. Thanks Linds. I really appreciate it.”
“Don’t worry about it, after everything? Just consider it a house warming gift. Now can we pay for it and leave? I’m freezing and my bruises have bruises which I have to ice before my face swells up like a balloon. Why didn’t you take me to gentle spin class, why krav maga of all things?” Lindsay whined at Charlotte but their smiles died when they made eye contact. They both knew why they were taking that class, and their boxing class, and kung fu. They both wanted to feel safe again. Safe and sober.
The next morning Charlotte sat on the porch she shared with the downstairs neighbours waiting for Lindsay and her wife, Vanessa, to show up in Vanessa’s pick up so they could head to brunch and then pick up the mirror. Charlotte was looking forward to the journey of making her apartment like a home instead of the place she just slept at. Starting from scratch was absolutely necessary for her mental health instead of being surrounded by the subtle reminders of whom she thought was the love of her life, instead of the red flag forest she really married.
I’m sorry somebody you loved made you think it’s hard to love you. It was one of the first things her therapist said to her after Charlotte summarised her relationship with Jeff. Now it was a mantra Charlotte liked to repeat to herself when bad memories of love gone so horribly wrong filled her with guilt, shame and the utter despair of grief.
Before Charlotte was swallowed by this melancholy, the two loud PAP PAP of her friends’ car horn roused her from her thoughts.
“Get in loser, we’re going shopping!” Vanessa grinned at her lopsidedly.
“No we’re not. We’re going for brunch and then ---” before Lindsay could finish from the passenger side, “It’s from Mean Girls!” Charlotte and Vanessa squealed in exasperation at Lindsay, who literally never got a single reference her wife and Chuck made.
“Sor-reeee!” Lindsay exclaimed.
Vanessa and Charlotte’s laughter ended in a sigh when Lindsay asked them where they’d rather go,
“Let’s just got to Boom, it’s not too busy. I just got back from Metro and there was only a handful of people in there when I walked by. You could park in the grocery stores parking lot, Ness and then we could take Ossington and pick up that mirror,” Charlotte supplied.
“Well those waffles were...awful. Awful waffles.” Lindsay complained.
“I’m sorry babe,” Charlotte offered her best apologetic grimace. “Remember Graffiti’s black metal brunch? I miss that place.” Charlotte reminisced of the mornings spent their in a said attempt to soak up the alcohol and drown out her tinnitus from playing the night before. That was how she met Jeff and some of those memories were still good ones. Before she could follow those bread crumbs of nostalgia into the dark woods of painful recollection Lindsay helpfully supplied, “Yeah the food was shit and they only seemed to play the same Dark Throne and Bathory cds on repeat, but yeah, she smiled unexpectedly and looked at Charlotte “I remember. When are you going to start playing again? I miss your voice. ‘Ness you've never seen Chuck in one of her bands but she used to play bass and sometimes at my house, when we were still in high school, she’d sing and play the piano. She sounded just like Fiona Apple.”
Vanessa loved to hear about their escapades before life tried it’s hardest to break them, she grinned at them both and motioned for Lindsay to continue to reminisce with her fork, enjoying the Chucks bright red face at being embarrassed. It was such a contrast to how confident and even bossy their friend could be. Praise made Charlotte uncomfortable, to the point of pain and Vanessa could never understand it but she supposed that is what made her so endearing.
“I do NOT!”, exclaimed Charlotte “I just do a terrible impression of her in an excuse to play that song whenever I sit in front of a piano.”
“Pardon me,” Lindsay feigned solemn regret placed her hand to her breast and hung her head.
“Oh give it a rest, let’s go. I want my new toy.”