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“I’ve been wanting to talk to you about something,” Tatsumi said. His head rested against Eichi’s chest as Eichi absentmindedly ran his fingers through Tatsumi’s hair.
“Mm?”
“What are your thoughts on marriage?”
Eichi blinked. “What?”
“Well,” Tatsumi said. “I’m sure you’ve noticed the uh…tension between us. I would very much like to, well, act on it, if we can find a time where there’s no one else around. And I don’t practice sex before marriage.”
Eichi stared at him, not quite sure of what to say.
“It’s a simple matter,” Tatsumi said. “I got my certification so I can even do the ceremony myself.”
“Tatsumi,” Eichi began. He did his best to sound diplomatic but a note of incredulity crept into his voice nonetheless. “While I value you tremendously, I don’t…..not like that.”
“Ah. I’m sorry, I assumed you felt similarly,” Tatsumi said and Eichi belatedly realized his hands were still wrapped between the mint green strands of Tatsumi’s hair.
“I don’t…listen. I care for you deeply, I would love to fuck you or for you to fuck me, scandalizing the whole hospital with a man this lovely would be a dream but…marriage?”
“We would get divorced afterwards,” Tatsumi said. “I can’t do that part, but I know someone. I understand that there are a lot of various factors to consider.”
Eichi sat up, shifting Tatsumi off of him. “You…every day I become more confused with your relationship with God. Why is that any different than literally just having sex?”
“Sex is one of God’s most beautiful gifts,” Tatsumi said. “The ability to create pleasure together. But it isn’t to be taken lightly. It is also how children are made, a second gift from God. A marriage is showing you are ready for those gifts.”
“Tatsumi, you are aware that we can’t have a child, right,” Eichi said warily. God, he’d known Tatsumi was religious but the second, gay, immaculate conception was on a whole other level. He wondered which one Tatsumi thought would bear it.
Tatsumi laughed. “Of course. But just because that couldn’t happen for us doesn’t mean that what we do together means any less. I still want to undertake this with the same level of respect and dedication. My sexuality doesn’t affect that. I care about you deeply, Eichi. For me, marriage doesn’t have to mean forever. It doesn’t even have to mean love. But what it does mean is a mutual dedication to each other’s pleasure and what may come from it.”
Eichi shook his head disbelievingly. He was insane. Tatsumi had lost it with his insane talk of marriage and the gentle light shining in his eyes and the way he said mutual dedication to each other’s pleasure in a way that sounded like he, beyond a shadow of a doubt, meant it. “And we could get divorced whenever I wanted?”
“And we would get divorced whenever you wanted,” Tatsumi said.
“I need some time to think,” Eichi said.
Tatsumi dipped his head. “Of course.”
And he would be patient. And there would never be any pressure, if Eichi didn’t want this. Fuck, Eichi thought. It was insane, but he already had an idea of what his answer would be.