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"Ugh..." Hunter groaned aloud. Ever since arriving in the human realm a few weeks before, there had been many ups and downs and he'd experienced things he'd never even thought about before. One of those things was a human sickness called a common cold.
When he was first told he had a cold, he was frightened. Hypothermia was no joke, and he definitely did not want to have to deal with that for a second time. He was soon informed, however, that it was just like a common mold, only minus the mushrooms and, well, mold. He was grateful for that, at least.
Another thing he was grateful for, was a certain plant witch who'd insisted on helping him as the ailment ran its course.
He'd tried to deny her help at first, but she was stubborn and he was too sick to argue, so help it was.
He was now on his fourth morning of rotting on the couch and was feeling much better than the previous three. All that remained of his symptoms were a slight headache, some fatigue, and an unfortunate and contradictory combination of a runny and stuffy nose.
Even if he didn't feel like he was on his deathbed (not metaphorically, Hunter was just dramatic.) anymore, Willow still insisted on sitting with him and making sure he was doing alright.
"Is your forehead warm? Let me see if it's warm." She reached out and pressed her hand against his forehead without waiting for an answer. He watched her eyebrows knit together, pondering her answer before taking her hand off and sitting down next to him. "You're good. Camila said a warm forehead is a sign of a fever, and fevers are dangerous. I think."
Hunter nodded along to the words she'd consistently said every day since he came down with the cold. She'd made a routine out of checking his temperature with her hand at least twice a day, not that he had any complaints.
"Are you feeling okay?" She continued. "Can you talk? You sounded sorta scratchy last night, I hope you didn't lose your voice."
He cleared his throat and smiled softly. Being fussed over like this was something he never thought he'd tolerate, let alone enjoy, and yet here he was. "I can talk fine, don't worry."
"You sound kinda nasally, though... Would you like tea? I could make tea."
"Yeah, tea would be-" He cut himself off with an unattractive sniffle, feeling his nose about to run. Gross. "Ugh, sorry. Could you get me a tissue please?" He wiped aggressively at his eyes as if the motion would be enough to erase the look and feel of many years of sleep deprivation that was only made worse by the sickness.
When he opened his eyes again, he was met with Willow's smile and a tissue in her hand. "Here you go," She said.
Hunter hesitated, that tissue seemed to have materialized out of thin air. He leaned to the side to glance at the coffee table. No tissue box.
She noticed his hesitance and frowned. "Is something wrong?"
"Where did you get that?" He pointed at the tissue in an accusatory manner. Perhaps she had just used a spell circle, though that wasn't likely since Camila had banned magic usage in the house due to... certain events.
"Oh!" He may have been hallucinating, maybe human molds had that side effect, but he thought he caught a glimpse of a hint of blush on her cheeks as her smile turned bashful. "I, uh... Heh, I dunno why I'm being so awkward, sorry. I keep a mini pack of tissues in my- my bra. Y'know, for... convenience. If that's gross, it's totally fine! I can find- I'm sure there's a box around here somewhere, instead."
She started to stand, but she didn't get far before a very confused Hunter opened his mouth. "Your what?"
"My bra..." Willow's blush intensified–turns out he wasn't hallucinating–and she looked away from him now that she was standing. "Sorry, sorry, I know! I'll be right back with a box of 'em."
"What's a bra?"
Those three words stopped her in her tracks.
She turned around and stared at him, an incredulous look that made Hunter's nerves spike. "Are you serious?"
"As serious as can be, Captain. I don't know what that is. Is it a human thing?" He wasn't sure why she was acting so shocked, it wasn't like he didn't ask about things like this on the regular. He was always learning about new and apparently common items that he had no prior knowledge of, and usually, his friends were happy to teach him. This time, that did not seem to be the case.
A sudden laugh burst from Willow's throat, one that wasn't of humor but of disbelief. She covered her mouth and turned away again, this time she wasn't walking away. She stood there, hand over her mouth, before taking a deep, composing breath and sitting back down on the couch.
"Hunter," She started, her voice sounding choked like she was holding something back. She bit her lip to hide a smile. "Are you sure you're for serious? Like, for super-serious?"
"Captain, I swear to you, I am for super-duper-serious, and you're starting to make me nervous." That was a lie, he had been nervous since the moment she first sat down with him, but she didn't need to know that.
"Sorry, sorry, I just... Okay," She took another steadying breath. "A bra-" She could no longer contain herself as giggles escaped her mouth. She tried to shield it with her hand again, but that didn't work this time. "Hun- do- do you know..." She trailed into uncontrollable laughter at the mere thought of finishing that question.
Hunter was not so amused. He frowned. Normally, hearing his Captain's laughter was almost guaranteed to make him join in, but this time he simply did not know what was so funny. "Captain, please."
She stopped laughing, looked into his desperate eyes, and burst out laughing again.
Behind him, he heard footsteps making their way down the stairs. He looked behind him and saw Luz, who seemed to be making her way into the kitchen. Great, maybe she could help.
The two made eye contact and Luz walked over, raising an eyebrow at the scene. "Morning, Hunter. Good to see you up and at 'em. Is she... okay?" She pointed at Willow, who was too wrapped up in whatever she found so funny to notice that Luz had entered the room.
"Luz! I'm so glad you're here." He gestured for her to come closer, to which she complied. "I asked her a completely genuine and unamusing question and she just- started laughing at me!"
A knowing glint sparkled in Luz's eye and she plopped down on the living room floor. "Oh, I gotta see this."
Willow shook her head, finally acknowledging Luz's presence. She seemed to have, for the most part, calmed down. "Oh, Luz, thank goodness. Maybe you can help out."
"Always!" Luz grinned. Hunter's frown deepened.
"Guys, please."
"So, what was the question?" Luz ignored Hunter.
Willow's face contorted with another wave of held-back laughter. She swallowed harshly and took in another breath. "He doesn't- doesn't know..."
"Stop dragging it out, can one of you please tell me what a bra is?!" Hunter finally shouted, too sick to deal with her shenanigans anymore. How hard was it to just give him an answer, for Titan's sake?
Luz snorted. "Wait, that's the question? Hunter, you don't know what a bra is?"
"Obviously not!" His reaction sent the girls back into a giggle fit. He fell back against the arm of the couch, defeated. "Can you guys please stop making fun of me and give me an explanation? It's all I ask, really."
“Wait, wait.” Willow leaned down towards Luz and whispered something in her ear, giggling all the way through. Luz covered her mouth in a failed attempt to not join in with her infectious laughter.
"Okay, okay Hunter. First, lemme riddle you this..." Luz began. She glanced at Willow and snorted. "Do you know what- hehe, do you know what boobies are?"
Hunter squeaked, his face heating up to what he was sure was equal to the temperature of the boiling sea. "Of course, I know what boobies are!" His defensive tone didn't have much effect when his face was as red as it was.
"Ha, Hunter said 'boobies'! That sounds so wrong in your voice!" Luz cackled loudly in a way that would make Eda proud. Hunter scowled at her immaturity.
"So if you know what- what boobs are, how don't you know what bras are?" Willow inquired, still obviously stifling her giggles.
Hunter covered his eyes with the palms of his hands and leaned back again, feeling rather exasperated over the fact that these damn girls wouldn't just give him an explanation already. "Because b-breasts are a part of some witches–and I guess humans–anatomy, which is a subject I've studied in the past out of curiosity. And I don't know what bras are because you two aren't telling me what bras are!" He sat up quickly with a piercing glare that wasn't nearly as scary as he'd intended it to be.
"A bra is just, like, underwear for boobs," Luz supplied simply. Hunter blinked, his scowl morphing back into confusion. She noticed and continued. "Y'know, it, like... covers them? And provides support if needed, and stuff?"
"What?"
"Woah, you really don't know."
His glare returned in full force. "Was that not obvious?!"
"Calm down, calm down," Willow said before things got heated. She loved how sibling-like Hunter and Luz were, but their bickering could get to be a bit... much if left uninterrupted.
Hunter inhaled before muttering, "Why do... why do breasts need underwear?"
"I actually don't know." Luz looked at Willow, who just shrugged to show that she also didn’t know.
"I think it has something to do with modesty and societal norms, but I'm not sure."
"Okay, that... makes enough sense, I guess." Hunter cleared his throat again and looked at anything but the two in the room. "So, uh, why do you keep tissues in there?"
"Oh, tissues!" Willow jumped up suddenly and rushed out of the room.
"Tissues?" Luz asked. Hunter finally looked down at her.
"Yeah, tissues. I asked for one and she, um, took one out of her bra. I asked where she got it and she told me, then I asked what a bra is and the rest is history."
Willow jogged back into the room with a small cardboard box decorated with blue and white swirls. She sat down and handed the box to Hunter, which he gratefully accepted.
"Thank you," He said, "But you didn't answer my question."
"Oh! Well, some people use their bras as extra storage, I guess. It's like a secret pocket." She reached into her shirt and pulled out her mini plastic bag of tissues.
"It's like magic..." He murmured.
"I keep chapstick in here too." She pulled out a little stick of chapstick to prove it and beamed at how impressed Hunter looked. "And some human snails, and my phone sometimes. The phone is kinda like a last resort, though."
"Oh, I keep money in mine, too," Luz added. "I don't have enough space for the other stuff, though." She ran a hand down her small chest to further enunciate her "lack of space".
Willow giggled. "Yeah, safe to say I don't have that problem."
"Oh, quite bragging, you." Luz grinned and nudged her leg with her elbow.
Meanwhile, Hunter blew his nose into the tissue as softly as he could manage and tried not to listen to the girls in front of him. Whatever conversation they were having now was nothing he wanted to hear, especially after the painfully awkward one he'd just initiated.
He heard footsteps and a door opening and folded the used tissue in his hand. He peaked over the back of the couch to see Gus leaving the basement and looking in his direction.
"Hey, Hunter!" He called. "If you're feeling up to it, can you c'mere? I wanna show you something."
"Oh, thank Titan," Hunter whispered under his breath and hopped off the couch, eager to leave the girls and the tension he'd created that only himself seemed to be aware of. "Yes, coming!"