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With the adventure over and the mountain reclaimed, Bilbo felt content in finding his place among his new family. Being the only one who could stomach the elves or any group of people for a long period of time, he quickly fell into diplomacy, helping the mountain rebuild their trade routes and relations with other kingdoms. When he had first settled, he was in the remaining barracks along with other displaced dwarves coming back to the mountain, but he was soon relocated to a room closer to the royal family once Thorin realized he had been sleeping in the receiving room when meetings went late and the journey back to the barracks was too long.
Things between Bilbo and Thorin had been good. Once Thorin had properly recovered and was back on his feet, he and Bilbo had sat down and apologized for the things that had been said and done while Thorin had been influenced by the gold sickness. They had shared secret smiles and brief touches to arms, shoulders, sides as they parted ways. For a few days Bilbo had allowed himself to hope that Thorin might return the love he felt for the dwarf.
On his way to dinner that night, Bilbo heard Thorin and Balin’s voice filter into the hallway. He had every intention of passing right on by, but he heard them talking about him. “The halfling doesn’t belong here, Balin.” Thorin’s words pierce Bilbo’s chest like an arrow and he slaps his hand over his mouth to stifle the gasp. Bilbo slips the ring on to hide himself and leans in further to hear.
“Thorin,” Balin starts and Bilbo hears him sigh, “I know after the battle you’ve been worried but this is Bilbo’s home now too. You’ve seen the work he’s put into rebuilding your kingdom. You can’t honestly believe him still an outsider.”
Bilbo holds his breath, waiting for Thorin to admit that Balin is right, accept him into the mountain like Bilbo already thought he had. “I will believe whatever I want.” This time Bilbo can’t stifle the noise that comes out of his mouth and quickly flees down the hall before either dwarf could look out.
At dinner Bilbo eats little. Seated in between Nori and Bofur, he pushes his food around his plate, giving up pieces to other members of the company when asked. Everyone seemed to pick up on his worsening mood because the larger creatures were more careful to not jostle him as they normally would and their comments and jabs were a touch more gentle. He feels Ori nudge him from across the table, “I think you ate more while we were on the road and didn’t have any food. What’s troubling you?”
Bilbo tries to paste a smile on his face, “Nothing that can be easily fixed. I fear I must handle this myself. But you don’t need to worry, Ori. I am sure I will be back to normal soon.”
Ori looked concerned but nodded and turned back to his food. Sitting beside Fili a couple seats down, Thorin pipes up, “He is probably just missing his armchair and hearth. Homesickness is easily cured.”
Bilbo’s head snaps up and he glares at Thorin, “The only one who seems to think this not my home is you, your highness. So this perhaps is not so easily cured.” The use of the honorific amongst the company has an immediate effect. All conversation drops away and wide eyes turn to Bilbo. Even Thorin’s eyebrows raise a couple centimeters at the hobbit. Bilbo doesn’t flinch or drop his eyes, “I ran out of my hobbit hole after a fallen king who had lost his home. I stayed following the first encounter with Azog after being doubted and cast aside because I believed in you and this company became family. After the mountain was reclaimed I have done my best to support and help you all because-,”
Bilbo pauses and glances at the rest of the company, but shakes his head and looks back at Thorin, “because I am in love with you. And I believed that you felt the same, or maybe would in the future. I believed I had finally proved myself but it seems I will never be anything more than a weak halfling and a burden.” Something wet splashes against hand and he looks down to see a tear. He touches his cheeks and when they come away wet he rolls his eyes.
“Bloody hell,” he mutters and pushes back from the table. No one tries to stop him and he doesn’t know what would happen if they did. He quickly goes to the rocky terrace he had claimed as a future green area. He dries his face and groans when he sits, putting his head in his hands.
A fur cloak drops around his shoulders and two bodies press close to him on either side. Bilbo lifts his head to look as Fili and Kili lean their heads against his, “He does care for you, you know.” Fili mutters as warmth begins to leech into Bilbo’s fingers and toes.
He chuckles and takes each of the boys hands, squeezing tight, “I appreciate the thought, but I’m not a tween anymore. If Thorin doesn’t want me like I do him, I will grow to accept that and move on. All I can do now is continue to work like I always have and maybe one day he will see me as a member of the company like you do.” Kili and Fili are still tense next to him and Bilbo sighs, “I will not leave the mountain, boys. This is my home now. Thorin will have to banish me if he wants me to go.”
The young dwarves practically melt into Bilbo’s sides. “We were worried Uncle had driven you away.” Kili admits.
“No, I am here to stay.” Bilbo hesitates. “I gave away my home in the Shire.” The boys lean away and stare at Bilbo in surprise. “I know I should have gotten permission from your uncle to stay, but I assumed he would be alright with it. I’ve been talking to some leaders in the Shire for a while and in my last letter handed the deed to a cousin of mine and his new family. They have a new fauntling and Bag End is a wonderful place to grow up.”
“But what of your belongings still there?” Fili asks, voice still astonished.
“Well some of them are on their way and should be here sometime tomorrow I believe. Others were left behind for the new family. They no doubt will have things with them as well, but it never hurts to have extras lying about.” Bilbo lets go of their hands and stands, pulling the fur cloak tighter around his shoulders. He turns and smiles at the boys, feeling a little lighter. “I have a long day in Laketown tomorrow, so I should turn in early.”
Fili perks up, “What are you doing in Laketown?” Bilbo explains the work he’s been doing between the Elves, Men, and Hobbits over the past few months and the hope he has for their relationship with each other and the dwarves of Erebor. When he’s finished Kili and Fili both look at him like they’re seeing him for the first time. Fili as the heir is the first to recover. “That could change the pace of the rebuild dramatically.”
Bilbo flushes at the compliment and shrugs, “I’m not sure about that but I’m doing what I can. I have to leave before first light and probably won’t be back until after dark, so if anyone comes looking for me, cover for me.”
Kili and Fili share a glance and Bilbo misses the wicked grin mirrored by each of the dwarves. They bid Bilbo goodbye and the hobbit makes his way back inside the mountain.
Bilbo is awoken by a knock on his door early the next morning, the fire in his room still banked to keep his room warm during the night. Balin enters his common room as he finishes getting dressed and starts putting his pack together. Balin stands near the door and watches him for a minute, “Are you going somewhere?”
“Laketown. Bard is hosting a meeting with other kingdoms regarding some trade expectations. I will be back late so don’t wait for me.” Bilbo finishes packing his bag and smiles at Balin, “Did you need something from me before I go?”
Balin shakes his head, clasping Bilbo on the shoulder, “I can see that you are going to be busy so this is something that can wait until tomorrow. I will simply wish you safe travels.”
Bilbo nods and steps around Balin toward the door, “I’m not sure that he will, but if Thorin asks for me, will you tell him I am away? That I’ll be available for whatever he needs tomorrow?”
Balin nods, a twinkle of mischief in his eye. Bilbo’s eyebrows furrow but he says nothing more as he leaves and begins the long journey to Laketown. The meeting goes better than Bilbo could have ever imagined and he leaves Laketown with the setting sun behind him, a scroll clutched in his hand and a grin nearly splitting his face in two.
The walk feels shorter going back to the mountain than it did going into Laketown and Bilbo feels more at peace than he has in days so rather than walking straight into the bustle, he slips his ring on and walks in undetected, quickly making his way back to his room. The further into the mountain he gets the more frantic various dwarves seem to be. They run back and forth down the halls, calling to one another in Khuzdul. Seeing Bofur at the end of the hall, Bilbo takes off the ring and hurries to him. “Bofur! What’s going on?”
Seeing the hobbit, Bofur throws his hands into the air, “Bilbo! There you are! We’ve been looking everywhere for you.”
Shrugging, Bilbo holds up the scroll, “I went to get this, need to give it to the king tonight.”
A small smile lights up Bofur’s face, “I think you’ll find him in his rooms.” Bilbo nods and Bofur yells something to the other dwarves in their language and things begin to calm down immediately. Bilbo arrives at Thorin’s door and knocks before he can convince himself not to.
A gruff voice asks him inside and he pushes open the door, slipping inside. When Thorin sees it’s Bilbo his eyes widen and he takes a quick step toward the hobbit before stopping himself. “Halfling, I did not expect you. I thought you were gone.”
Bilbo looks around the room, trying to avoid Thorin’s eyes. “I would have been back sooner, but Bard was insisting I stay for dinner and you know I can never turn down a meal.”
Thorin’s stance softens and he takes another step, “Bilbo-”
“I dropped by to give you this. It’s late and I’m ready to rest after a whole day of walking and talking, so read it over and decide whether you like it or not.” Bilbo backs up toward the door, finally letting his eyes land on Thorin. He looks like a man who hasn’t slept in days, dark circles deep set under his eyes. His skin is pale and his hair looks limp and dull. Sick, almost. Bilbo wants to wrap his arms around Thorin and soothe whatever makes him look so upset, but it isn’t his place. Thorin has made it very clear that he sees the hobbit as nothing more than a nuisance and Bilbo doesn’t have it in him anymore to try and push for something that he can’t have. “Good night, your highness.”
Thorin opens his mouth to say something but the door to the suite bursts open, Fili and Kili both falling into the room, “Bilbo!” They yell in unison. They look at their uncle who looks unimpressed at his nephews. They grin sheepishly at him but soon turn their attention back to Bilbo. “Your cart arrived today while you were away. We took the liberty of having it unloaded into your rooms so it would be ready for when you returned.”
Bilbo’s heart beats faster and he feels a grin lift his face at the thought of an evening spent in his chair by the fire. Bilbo looks back at Thorin once more, “Tomorrow, then.” Thorin looks like he wants to say something but nods and Bilbo goes. He allows Fili and Kili to lead him back to his rooms a few halls over once they usher him back, a weight that he didn’t know was on his chest lifted.
He may have accepted that the mountain was his new home, but he still missed Bag End and its little things. His chair by the fire, his books in a case in the corner, the more sentimental pieces of his mother’s china displayed on a shelf above the hearth. He spins in a slow circle and takes in all of the pieces of his old life in the Shire and how well they mesh with his new life in the mountain. His green armchair with his grandmother’s doily perched next to the squat stone armchair gifted to him by a dwarf from Erebor. An image of Bilbo and Thorin sitting in those chairs at night sharing a pipe pops up in his brain but he’s quick to push it away as the brothers show him the things they did to help him unpack in the room. Bilbo shoos them out after a while, needing some time to himself and sinks into the chair with a sigh, breathing in the familiar scent.
He starts to take out his pipe but a knock sounds at the door and he rolls his eyes. He just wants to rest, but there is no rest for a hobbit in a mountain of dwarves. He calls in the visitor, expecting one of the boys to be back to show him someone else, but his back is forced straighter when Thorin strolls in and stops short on seeing the additions to the room. “You had things sent from the Shire?”
Bilbo stands and feels a blush rise to his face like he’s being scolded, “I know I probably should have gotten your permission first. I could have them sent back if-” His sentence is cut off when Thorin surges forward, taking Bilbo’s face in his hands and kissing him. Bilbo immediately kisses back, gripping the front of Thorin’s coat. He pulls Thorin in even closer, pressing the front of their bodies flush to each other. When Thorin’s tongue starts licking along Bilbo’s lips, he pulls back to look at Thorin, “I don’t understand.”
Thorin leans their foreheads together, keeping Bilbo close, “I’ve spent the better part of today believing that I had finally succeeded in making you see reason and leave. Having you in front of me, I can’t hold back anymore.”
Bilbo scoffs, “I told Fili, Kili, and Balin that I was just going to Laketown today. They said they would let you know if you came looking for me.”
“I have the feeling that they were trying to ‘teach me a lesson’. Show me what life would be like if you actually left and didn’t come back.”
Bilbo rises on his toes and presses a gentle kiss to Thorin’s lips, “I’m here to stay, but why, then, did you tell Balin that I did not belong?”
Thorin’s eyes bore into his, the blue looking darker with uncertainty, “Hobbits are meant for green and grass. You left behind your soil and sunshine for stone and darkness. I did not believe you would be happy here.” Thorin looks away and mumbles, “I could not make you happy here.”
Bilbo guides Thorin’s face back to look at him, “I may sometimes want for the warmth of the sun or the grass between my toes, but I ache for you like a limb numb from the cold, my king.”
“Say my name.” Thorin breathes out. When Bilbo furrows his eyebrows and looks at him in confusion, he continues. “Foolishness has kept my name from your lips for too long. I have grown tired of hearing you refer to me only in title. Please?”
“Thorin,” Bilbo whispers into the scant space between them, “beloved.”
With a groan, Thorin brings their mouths back together, sliding his hands from Bilbo’s face down his sides, eventually wrapping his arms around Bilbo’s back, lifting him up until Bilbo winds his legs around Thorin’s waist. Thorin walks them into Bilbo’s bedroom, laying Bilbo on the bed and covering his body with his own.
Hands that were keeping Bilbo from falling start unbuttoning his waistcoat, lips moving from Bilbo’s mouth to his jaw, “I love you,” he whispers reverently against Bilbo’s skin. With surprising strength, the hobbit flips them over so he’s straddling Thorin with a thigh on either side of the dwarf. He smiles wickedly down at him and starts undoing laces and buckles with nimble fingers. Thorin licks his lips as the bare milky skin of Bilbo’s chest teases him from the half buttoned shirt. Once Thorin’s own shirt is open, he leans up to lack onto a pack of skin near Bilbo’s collarbone as the hobbit slides the shirt from his shoulders. Bilbo’s own shirt is quickly removed after this and the two explore newly exposed skin.
Later, both sated and sleepy, Thorin is cushioned in the arms of the smaller creature as Bilbo whispers all of the sweetnesses that he had longed to spill for so long, Thorin falling asleep to the voice of his One. In the morning still wrapped in the warmth of their new bond, Bilbo tells the tale of giving up his home in Bag End and the treaty he drafted with with the Elves, Men, and Hobbits that keep trade routes open and include resources recently unavailable because Hobbits have historically been rather secretive and stingy with their natural wares. But something about having a hobbit living within the dwarven kingdom has made them rethink their previous position. With the addition of the new partner, trade burdens are lightened for all kingdoms, but if Erebor somehow gets out of the whole thing with fewer responsibilities but equal reward, everyone will simply chalk it up to rebuilding. Never a clever hobbit. Thorin stares at Bilbo through all of this, his face cycling between devotion, love, and pride for his little hobbit. Once Bilbo has regaled the whole tale Thorin rolls them over so he is on top smiling down at Bilbo, "I will sign whatever you put in front of me later this afternoon. For now, my duties require I show you just how much you belong right here in this bed, with me." Thorin leans down and presses a kiss to each of Bilbo's cheeks, to each of his eyelids, his chin, his forehead, his temps, his jaw, whispering, "I love you" in between each kiss. Bilbo smiles softly, whispering his own "I love you"s when Thorin's mouth travels down his body.
If in the coming days things go missing from Bilbo’s rooms to find their perfect home in the King’s quarters, no one mentions anything. And if a few months later a new braid appears in Thorin’s hair proclaiming him intended, the dwarves of Erebor simply cheer for their new consort when his hair grows long enough to don his own braid set with a marriage bead created by Thorin’s own hand.