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[Edit: 1 Dec 2022] BITCH I FOUND IT!!
The Brucie’s little princess post (honestly a major miracle since I read it over 5 years ago as screen caps on Pinterest of all places)
Favorite Child by bluethursday on Tumblr
Go check out Cielle_Noire
Tim is officially moving out of Wayne Manor and into an apartment with his boyfriend of two years. Danny is fully Bat-approved of course because his family refuse to allow someone "unworthy" to have romantic relations with their "princess."
Ugh! Even just thinking of the nickname gives him the shudders.
Even Danny has decided to get in on it, the traitor, calling him Rapunzel. When Tim asked if that meant Danny was Flynn Rider, Danny looked contemplative before replying, 'No. I'm Elsa,' with a cheshire grin firmly on his face. 'We're keeping the Flynn position open just in case we decide to expand.' He even had the audacity to wink at Tim. Wink.
And damned if that wasn't the weirdest, most offhanded, and ridiculously genius way to let your partner know that you're open to a poly relationship. Time couldn't help but love Danny all the more for it.
The move-in itself went smoothly. All of his family pitched in and helped with the moving and unpacking. In hindsight, everything went too smoothly.
Tim sees that now, on his very first day waking up here, as he faces down the tiny rubber duck bobbing around on his coffee. It takes him a minute to realize that he must have blearily poured his coffee over the top of the little guy in his sleep induced haze.
Now most of the time he'd shrug it off as a one time event. However, seeing as this is the fourth duck he's encountered today, he knows better.
His siblings and Co. used helping him move in as a way to hide who knows how many ducks of various types shapes and sizes around the apartment.
He groans and thunks his head on the table. It's too early to deal with this.
Danny's chuckle echoes across the room and behind Tim as he pads in on silent feet.
"Back to sleep already Rapunzel? Careful with that or we'll have to start calling you Briar Rose," he teases.
Tim let's out another tired groan in response.
As Danny rounds the corner of the table to sit across from Tim. As his eyes alight on the floating duck he noticeably has to bite his lip to hold back a laugh. He manages with a strangled sort of clearing of his throat.
"I like your little buddy."
Tim sits up, slamming his hands on the table loudly.
"YOU! You knew..." he accuses.
Danny's sheepish grin is answer enough.
"How could you Elsa?! How could you side with them? You're supposed to stand with me in solidarity," Tim whines dramatically.
"Technically that is for 'after' we move in together. This happened as you were moving in."
"Betrayal from my own boyfriend," Tim clutches his heart. "You better help me find them."
Danny rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. "Sorry hun, but I'm not allowed to interfere."
"You helped them, didn't you?"
"Nooot exactly, but I may have provided extra materials."
"Danny...just how many ducks are we talking here?"
"..." Danny bites his lip and mumbles something incoherent.
"I can't hear you."
"I said problyoverahundred," he blurts in a rush.
"Danny..."
"Most likely over a hundred, okay?!"
"Why??? Why did you let this happen?" Tim groans, before chugging the rest of his coffee. "Sometimes...I wonder why I put up with you."
Danny grins as he floats up to lounge mid-air, leaning across the table so that his head is near enough for him to plant a quick kiss on Tim's forehead.
"Be-cause you looove me."
Tim snorts, as he stands with his now empty mug in hand. "I suppose I must," he replies in faux-resignation.
He regrets forgiving his boyfriend so quickly when he goes to scoop more coffee grounds only to uncover...
...yes another duck.
Two hours later, with Danny gone for the day, Tim is at his wit's end. He now has a small army of three duck candles, 5 Danny-ice ducks, and who only knows how many rubber ducks of various sizes.
AND THEY JUST KEEP SHOWING UP!
Every time he turns around he finds another one. In his cupboards, his desk drawers, on top of things, under things, tucked in between in the small spaces. He found one when he unfolded a pair of socks! There's a fuzzy duck hanging under his towel in the bathroom, ducks in his shoes, ducks, Ducks, DUCKS!
At this point Tim wants to sob. This is so far beyond a prank. This, is insanity and Tim just wants to go back to bed at this point, but he's 80% sure he'll find more ducks in his bed somehow and can't bring himself to check. The duck plush under his favorite blanket on the couch makes him plant face first into the cushions and scream.
By the time Danny gets home, Tim flies into his arms desperately.
"Danny please...There's so many..."
Danny's eyes widen at the sight of the horde of ducks on display.
"How. The. Fuck?" Evidently he didn't expect this many either. "When did they have time to hide all these?"
"I don't know!" Tim sobs as he hides his face in Danny's hoodie.
"Okay," Danny says decisively. "Let's go Rapunzel. You need some fresh air and food. I'll even get us coffee."
Tim clings tighter, murmuring a quiet thanks as Danny guides him to his shoes. They manage to get ready to go with minimal duck interference. Danny chucks the offending squeaky duck across the room.
Tim koalas onto Danny for comfort. One of the plus sides of having a partner with enhanced strength.
"I love you so much right now," Tim whispers.
Danny laughs, the rumbling sound a balm on Tim's nerves. He decides he loves the feel of it and that he should really do this koala thing more often. Take advantage of his options.
"You know you probably could have just left the apartment," comments Danny.
Scoffing, Tim replies, "It's a matter of principle Elsa. I HAVE to find them all."
"You bats and your obsessions," Danny says with a chuckle. The fondness in his voice is undeniable.
"It's why you love me," Tim sniffs.
"No, I love you because you are just as much of a disaster human as me," Danny corrects teasingly.
"Rude."
"It's true"
"Still rude."
They pass the rest of the walk in a comfortable silence, Tim listening to the slow steady beat of Danny's heart. Slower than a regular person's and somehow all the more relaxing for it.
He gets down to stand on his own feet when they arrive at the cafe but twines his hand with Danny's.
"You're the best. Have I ever told you that?" Tim croons over his coffee, while offering the praise to Danny.
He just snorts, "Oh yeah, I'm pretty sure you thought a little differently this morning."
"All is forgiven with quintuple shot coffee," Tim states as if it is a universal fact.
Danny laughs. It's a bright sound that echoes just a smidge beyond the range of a normal human, but Tim loves the sound. And really, Danny didn't know the sheer extent his siblings went to with the d-words. No he's not gonna say it lest the curse follow them beyond the apartment. 'Danny should really laugh like this more often,' Tim thinks.
The way Danny turns serious and looks at Tim with a sort of dopey smile and blush tells him that he must have said that out loud without realizing. Tim ducks his head and attempts to hide his blush behind his coffee cup.
The moment is broken by a blur of black hurtling into Danny at a rather high velocity.
Danny for his part lets out a loud "oof" before wrestling with the person. A girl in a studded jean jacket, hair wild, baggy pants with various chains and patches. Very punk in Tim's opinion.
The continued grin on Danny's face has Tim relaxing.
"You little...You should have called me!" Danny manages to pout, even as he has to fend off the slightly younger looking version of himself.
It's been a while since Tim has seen Dani with an 'i' and she's changed a lot in that time, so it takes him a minute to recognize her.
He nearly spits his coffee when a soft sound comes from beside their table. And its...
Oh...its Conner and he looks...wow...
Apparently Dani's 'Clones Only Trip' has changed them both and helped them grow together. He's sporting a similar look to Little Dani. His jean jacket is ripped and dyed black. He also has more patches than Dani. He's shaved the sides of his head and it looks really good and oh man Tim has been staring for way too long, hasn't he?
"Hey Kon, it's been a while," he greets, scooting over in their booth to give Conner room to sit next to him. Danny and Dani are still wrestling with one another, both cackling up a storm.
"You look good," he adds after a moment.
Conner offers him a small smile in return. "I have been good. Traveling with Dani has been good."
"That's good. I'm glad you got what you've always deserved," Tim says quietly. At Conner's questioning look he continues, "Space to figure out who you are and what you like and time away from the expectations."
Conner nods. "Yeah. I did need that." His gaze fixes on Dani and Danny who've finally settled into occasionally ribbing each other, Dani tucked in front of Danny, his chin resting on her head with a purr of contentment.
Tim only knows Danny is purring from the specific look on his face, but Conner must hear it because he softens further, seeming to relax into the bench.
"Hi Conner," Danny says brightly. "I'm glad you and Lil' Dani have been out there watching each other's backs."
"You worry wort," Dani grumbles with her arms crossed, looking more adorable than anything.
"He does have a type of protection obsession," Tim reminds her.
She lets loose a disgusted noise, "Don't remind me."
"She has helped me figure out a lot," Conner says softly. There's an underlying peace to his demeanor now.
"She's good at that," Danny replies with a grin. "Aren't ya squirt."
Dani scowls and begins to flail, whacking Danny in the face no less than twice, not that he seems to mind.
Tim chuckles quietly and takes another sip of his coffee. Conner is watching him now, something in his eyes observing, evaluating the situation.
"So, what are you two up to anyways?" It's Little Dani who cuts in with the question.
Danny says "escape" at the same time Tim says "coffee date." Their eyes meet and both laugh.
At the confused look, Tim expands, "We're escaping the apartment via a coffee date."
"More like you were having a mental breakdown over ducks and I felt I needed to do something about it so I dragged you out of the house."
Tim glares at his partner, though it holds no heat, and throws a wadded up napkin in his direction. Unluckily for Little Dani, Danny simply lifts her up as a living shield and it smacks her in the face.
She thrashes in his arms swearing up a storm in between some rather creative threats. Danny's grin shows just how seriously he is taking her anger. Which is to say, not at all.
"Oh you finally decided to ask him out?" Conner asks Tim.
A wicked grin splits Danny's face.
Tim lunges across the table, snaking his arms around Dani to cover Danny's mouth.
"DOn't you dare!" he hisses out.
Conner's chuckle startles him enough for Danny to escape his grasp.
"I take it that means, he asked you then," he guesses. Tim groans and slouches back into his seat.
"The bastard beat me to it by 30 seconds," he grouched.
Dani squirms until she's leaning almost half way across the table.
"Okay, enough about that. I wanna know why you had a mental breakdown about ducks." Her grin is a mischievous feral sort of grin. Never a good sign.
It's Danny who throws Tim the metaphorical life preserver. Best. Boyfriend. Ever.
"It's not easy to explain. You miss the full effect. But we can show you," he says as he messes up Little Dani's spiky hair. He has to block the hand aiming for his nose as he skillfully maneuvers himself out of the booth.
Tim's grimace and dread in his eyes, speaks volumes of how he feels about the idea
"Come on, Rapunzel," Danny coaxes, "I'll even carry you back, if you'd like."
Tim drains his coffee as Conner slides out of the booth. He tosses the now empty cup into the trash can three booths away before shoving his way to his feet, groaning the whole way.
Dani is bouncing on her toes impatiently by the time Tim is standing.
Danny twines his hand with Tim's, pulling the reluctant detective along as they all leave the coffee shop.
The walk is filled with easy small talk. Despite Danny and Tim's obvious closeness, Conner surprisingly doesn't feel left out. Perhaps it's the wink Danny sends him when Little Dani and Tim aren't looking. He knows Danny is open to poly relationships, if his last one with his two best friends is anything to go by. From the way Little Dani talks about them, it sounds like they're all still close friends, so it must not have ended too badly.
When they reach the entrance of the apartment building, Danny scoops Tim up like he weighs as little as a small child.
Tim's koala imitation is rather impressive. He rests his chin on Danny's shoulder and sends Conner a small wave.
Rolling his eyes, Conner waves back.
~•~
The apartment is...ducks... so many ducks. At this point Tim stares at the invading army with a sort of numb apathy.
Little Dani is cackling, floating about three feet off the floor due to her laughing fit.
Conner has been reduced to silent staring, a quick run of his eyes just to be sure that what he's seeing is really true. After a long moment he picks up a blazingly bright pink duck candle and examines it. The sticker on the bottom proudly proclaims, "It Floats!" in bold lettering.
Danny dutifully acts as Tim's noble steed and/or piece of furniture, still carrying Tim as he watches Conner and Dani's reactions with an amused smile.
"What are you going to do with all these ducks?" Conner asks. The answer should only be one thing in his mind but he wants to hear it from Tim or Danny.
Danny's smile widens into a devious, fanged grin.
"We'll be sure to 'return to sender' and make it last as long as we can," he says in a loud stage whisper.
Little Dani's cackling continues as she drifts to hover around Conner's shoulders.
Conner gains a smirk to match, "We're in."