Chapter Text
Saiko-chan lived in the apartment below them ever since she could remember. She was young, pretty, and atrociously single, which was a constant subject of the gossip circles in the apartment building. Mei didn’t know much about that, only what she overheard from the adults – people wasn’t keen on discussing those kinds of things with a five-year-old, it seemed – but she hadn’t really cared about it anyway. What was more important, Saiko-chan was willing to teach Mei how to read. She did it with a certain eagerness too, like she was happy to help her. Her mother, who was always suspicious about people who wanted to hang out with her, or people in general, didn’t have any problem with this at all – if anything, she seemed to be amused by her daughters weirdly studios tendencies.
That’s why she should have already guessed that something was wrong when she asked her mother if she could go see Saiko-chan during play time and she smiled at her sadly.
“No, sweetheart, not today” she said. “But if you want to, you can go to Mushita-obaasan and see if she has those nice pastries that you liked the other day. I bet she would be happy to give you some if you chat with her for a while.”
Mei liked Mushita-obaasan – she especially liked her baking skills – but she was an old lady, nice and boring and she always wanted to talk about the weather for some reason. Saiko-chan on the other hand was as interesting as it gets. A young girl who was interested in poetry, and literature, was in a possession of a massive collection of books, fictional and academical. Mei’s favorite kind of person. She had office job, she worked for the government. It probably paid well, unless she wouldn’t be able to afford an apartment in the complex they lived in. Mei didn’t know what she did exactly, but she always went to work early in the morning and tumbled home late in the afternoon. Despite this, she never said no to hanging out with her.
She didn’t say no this time either. She was already standing in her doorway when Mei arrived in front of her apartment.
“Oh. Hi, Mei-chan.”
“Hello.” Mei bowed as it was polite even as an inexplicable sense of dread washed over her. She could not see the expression on Saiko-chan’s face.
“You are here for a lesson, I assume. Well, let’s go then.”
They sat in their usual spot at the dining table right next to the window. Mei was focused on her practice book. Kanjis were hard, not at all like her other mother language.
Saiko-chan was unusually quiet, barely spoke the whole time. Other times when they would sit together, she wasted no time to get into a lively conversation, even if Mei was not the most talkative child. She also would bring them some tea to drink, jasmine or green, as that was her favorite. Saiko-chan had not moved since they sit down. Mei peaked a curious glance towards her.
She was looking out the window, her face hidden by her long hair. “We have such a pretty garden in front, I never really paid it any mind. Never had the time I guess.” Her voice had a weird tone, almost melancholic. “It’s terrible isn’t it, how people just never appreciate what’s right in front of them. They have the everyday shit to worry about. They have to work, yeah. It did so much for me in the end, my work.” She laughed at that, more dry than joyous. “But I guess now I see it. So not everything is lost. I just wish I could feel the sun on my face.”
“We can go sit outside, if you want” Mei said, feeling uneasy again all the sudden. Like something was creeping up on her neck, making jitters run down on her spine.
“Hm.” She still didn’t look at her. “You are a good kid, Mei-chan. You have to be very careful, now. I hope even like this, you will be able to live a good life.”
“Saiko-chan…” Was it always this cold in there? They never opened the window. “…I don’t understand.”
“I’m sorry.” She put her hand on the table. Her fingers were broken in multiple places, dried blood cracked between them. Mei looked at them. Then she lifted her head. Saiko-chan turned her face towards her.
“I’m sorry” she said again, the remains of her mouth hanging bloody as she tried to shape the words. It seemed impossible that she was still able to speak with it. “Just wanted to spend time with someone for the last time.” Her face was – beaten crushed craved out – deformed to the point that the only thing Mei could make out of it was her glowing white eyes, hollow and lifeless.
Her mother didn’t understand why she ran through their door crying. She didn’t believe her when she said that everything was fine.
She thought there’s going to be more of them in the hospital than they turned out to be. There were a lot – but most of them were just passing through, never staying for a long time. Those who did stay, Mei knew how to avoid. There was an older woman on the first floor who liked to scream for hours to no end, but she only ever appeared in room 33, so if she gave the room a wide berth, she didn’t have to see or hear her. Or there was the young boy who liked to stand next to the operating rooms door. He never really did anything, just stood there in his bloody hospital gown, his intestines hanging slack from his stomach to the floor.
With those who randomly popped up, it was a little harder. There wasn’t a pattern to it really. Mei couldn’t get used to it, how one moment she was sitting in the staff room, trying to understand her chosen book of the day – most of the kanjis were still tricky to her – when they just appeared out of nowhere, bruised, and bloody, limps and insides hanging free. It didn’t help that ever since the Saiko-chan accident, her mother kept a close eye on her, even more so than before. Like she was waiting for her to start crying again or lose her mind in the middle of the room or both.
Her mother has been called in an emergency – there were a lot of emergencies these days, Mei was sure the hospitals were severely understaffed – and she could hear her and one of the other doctors, Sawamura-san, talking from the corner. She sat a little closer to them. One of the perks of being a child; no one held themselves back about what they were saying if they thought you were too young to understand it.
“…inhuman and stupid, as I said before” her mother said with barely contained anger in her voice.
“It’s war, Nishimura-san. The government is probably happy there are no more casualties” Sawamura-san said, her voice wavering at the end. “Although, I admit this is certainly… cruel. I don’t know how Dr. Mori even thought about this kind of thing.”
Her mother snorted, the sound filled with contempt. “Oh, don’t bother me with him. He was always like this. The government should have never let that man to be the head of anything, especially not a whole military force. I don’t even know how they could let him keep his license in the first place.”
Mei wanted to hear more of their conversation – this alleged war that has been going on since she existed in this world was very intriguing, but everybody was so tight lipped about it, like it was government secrets or something. Well, maybe it was. It wasn’t even that they didn’t want to tell her specifically, it’s that the adults rarely talked about it between themselves too. If they did, it was either in low voices in the shadows, or in non-descript ways about how wrong war itself was or how it was bad for the economy.
At the end, she didn’t find out more about the war, because a lady with her ribcage wide open, lungs visible choose this time to materialize right next to her and start screaming nonsense. Mei flinched from the unexpected noise. She tried to not look at her more than necessary, but her constant wailing made it kind of impossible to ignore her.
If the lady would have been less distracting, Mei would have noticed sooner that her mother was staring at her across the room.
“Mei” her mother said. She snatched her eyes away from the lady to look up at her. “Let’s get you something to eat while I wait for the results from the lab.”
She already knew that her mother has figured her out when she led her towards the janitors closet instead of the cafeteria. She knew this would happen sooner or later of course. Her mother was a smart woman – and not just because she was a doctor. She had frighteningly sharp eyes, and even more frighteningly sharp second senses. She always seemed to know that something is going on with her – even before Saiko-chan, even before she started to see them.
She could have lied. She could have told her mother its nothing, that she doesn’t have to worry about it. Probably could have made it to look like it was some kind of childish demeanor, something that she would grow out of over time. But when her – second, not the first, who she could barely even remembered, just knew that she was, that she existed – mother looked at her, the desperate question in her eyes, all she could think about how unfair this all was. How old was she? Six? And already ruined, already haunted by death, not even one, but in multiple ways. It seems she will never escape it.
So, she told her about the ghosts.
Her mother listened in silence; she didn’t interrupt her once. When she finished, they sat in silence for a while. Then her mother put her hand on her shoulders.
“Mei, look at me.” She stared into her mother’s eyes. She looked calm and serious, but there was something in her, something she has never seen before. Something that almost looked like fear. “You can never tell this to anyone else. Do you understand? Never. Not even if its someone you trust. Not even if its someone I trust.” Her grip strengthened. “There are certain people out there in the world, evil people, who seek out individuals with abilities beyond comprehension, so that they could exploit and use them for their own gain. They are looking for people like you, Mei. You have to be careful, very careful. They can’t find out that you can do what you do.” She paused, her eyes roaming Mei’s face, trying to see if she understood what she was saying. “Promise me, Mei. Promise you will never tell this to anyone.”
It won’t go away, she thought, a bitter taste in her mouth even if this is something she already knew. I will never get free of it. This is the life I have been bestowed upon the second time.
To her mother, she said: “I promise.”
On the walk back home from the hospital, her mother bought her an ice cream cone and announced that she is going to send her to aikido classes. After that, they didn’t spoke about her ability again for a long time.
The ghosts never went away. At first, she tried to ignore them. She quickly realized that that’s impossible. Mostly because they were terrifying. All blood and gore and lifeless eyes. And she wasn’t really a child, not in her mind, not in the way it really mattered. For the first time since she had a conscious thought, she was glad for it. She didn’t know what this would do to a real child. Nothing good, probably.
It gotten easier somewhat, after the first time she picked up enough courage and actually talked to one of them.
Turned out there was a lot of things that they wanted from her, the only person who could see them. By the time Mei was nearing her nineth birthday, it was an everyday occurrence for ghosts to find her and ask for her help.
That’s why, on that spring afternoon, she found herself walking next to one of the many small rivers of Yokohoma, dirty all over and bone tired. She spent her morning searching for a ghost’s lost dog. She chased it down at least four blocks until it hid behind a dirty dumpster, and she had to try and coax it out of there; she was left with multiple claw marks on her hands and smelling like garbage.
It was a typical ghost-job. It varied what exactly they asked of her, but a lot of time it was this. Animal-rescue. Mei started to question how many people in Yokohoma kept pets, because surely it wasn’t this many. Or maybe it was just her and her abysmal luck.
“Meow.”
There was a cat next to the sidewalk.
“Oh.” Mei stopped in her tracks. “Hi, kitty.”
The cat straightened from its place in the grass and came closer to rub itself against Mei’s leg. She blinked at it in surprise.
She never liked animals that much. In this life, animals didn’t really like her either – not like before. That was kind of a problem too, when every other ghost wanted her to find their pets that they left behind, but said pets were more likely to run and hide when she approached them instead of letting her get them to the closest animal shelter.
This cat didn’t get the memo, it seemed.
“Hm, you are quite a weirdo, aren’t you? I’m pretty sure the kitty committee won’t like you mingling with the likes of me” she said, as she bended down to pick it up. The cat meowed at her again. “Well don’t worry about it too much. I’m a weirdo too, my classmates made that very clear to me. So even if the other kitties ostracize you for approaching me, I am happy to hang out with you instead.”
The cat looked at her with serious eyes, like it understood everything that she was saying and took it to heart. It had an interesting fur pattern, like a patch-blanket: splotch of orange, brown and white covered its body.
“I think I’ve seen your type of breed before…” Mei thought out loud.
“Child.”
“Hu-” The sudden noise from right beside her ear made her take a step back in surprise. She nearly dropped the cat in her hands. “What-?”
There was a woman standing in front of her. She was short, even her nine-year-old eyes could see it. Still taller than her of course, an adult for sure and Mei still had to cram her neck to see her face clearly, but in the small number of people on the sidewalk she was noticeably small.
More importantly: her eyes shone with a faint white luminescence. She was a ghost.
She didn’t look like the crazier kind – her appearance was as normal as any other people on the street, no body part hanged loosely, nor blood splattered her clothes. One of the more collected ones, then. After the day she had, Mei was glad.
In her hands, the cat’s ears have stood to attention.
“I- uh- sorry, didn’t see you there, haha…” Mei glanced around to see if anyone was looking their way. It’s always awkward when adults see her talking to the air – or at least what they thought was air.
The woman stood still with unwavering eyes, in a way only a ghost can. Most people, living people that is, get tired of standing and looking in a certain way after a while. Not ghosts though; they can look in your eyes without blinking for hours if they wish so. Mei knew not to challenge them to a staring contest.
She shifted her weight from one leg to the other. “… do you need help, ma’am…?”
The ghost nodded, but not like she was agreeing with her, more like she just confirmed something.
The cat was staring up at Mei from her arms. If she didn’t know any better, she would say it looked almost shocked.
“Come with me” said the woman in a smooth voice, and then immediately turned to stride ahead. Mei didn’t have time to be surprised. The cat in her hands choose this moment to jump down to the ground and run the opposite way.
“Heh?” By the time Mei came to her senses, it already crossed the road and was throwing itself into the bushes on the other side of it. The ghost lady was still walking, unfazed by the fact that she’s not following her. “Heh? Woah, wait up…”
She stumbled after the ghost. She knew this wasn’t the best choice that she could have made. Following strange ghost for no reason other than an odd sense of “helpfulness” is not the safest way to live her life, but she was way past the stage where she could get out of this.
“Hey, where are we going?” she asked as she got to the ghost side. She carried on without even sparing a glance towards her, surprisingly fast considering her statue.
They soon reached one of the small bridges that crossed the river. The ghost didn’t falter, she went down on the side of the road to the riverbank. Mei had to half climb half slide down on the grass patches to keep up with her. There was a narrow walkable path between the riverbank and the road. It smelled like stale water and dirt. As Mei descended, she noticed a black spot in the swarm of green grass. It looked almost human shaped. The ghost went straight towards it.
From a closer look it was obviously a kid – spread out on the grass under a black cape. They were laying on their stomach, the only thing visible of them was their messy black hair.
It wasn’t a surprising sight. Homeless children sleeping in random places across the city were a rather common occurrence in Yokohoma, even after the war ended and the economic situation noticeably become better. She knew that it was because children were the most vulnerable demographic when it came to poverty, and also the ones who suffered the most during and post-warfare. But knowing this didn’t make it less hard when she had to pass them every day on the streets, clearly in need of food and shelter.
This kid looked pretty roughened up, grass and dust sticked to their cloak in random places, like they rolled around in the dirt and then rubbed grass in their clothes after for good measure. They laid on the ground in a weird angle. Mei had a bad feeling about this.
“Uhm hey, are you okay?” she asked as she approached the black figure. She grown more worried each step she took. She has never seen how ghosts were made before, and this wasn’t the day she wanted to witness it.
She crouched down next to them, trying to see their face. “Do you need help?”
Their head snaped up. “Heh?”
She come face to face with two startlingly green eyes. The boy blinked up at her owlishly, his long lashes fluttering, then he started grinning.
“Hello there!” he said in an energetic voice, his smile big on his face. “What are you doing on the ground, kid?”
“What am I…” She frowned. “What are you doing laying on the ground?”
He looked down at himself, as if he just noticed his position, then sat up in a hurry, sending grass flying everywhere. Mei put up her arms, trying to avoid getting stray grass in her mouth.
“I obviously fell from there, dummy.” He pointed to the road, back to where Mei came from a minute ago. “I rolled down on the side after I lost my balance. The grass kind of broke the fall, but it still hurt.”
“And then what? You decided to just lay there after?”
“Yeah.”
Okay.
“How did you lost your balance?”
“Oh, I have been attacked by a seagull! I was just walking on the sidewalk, minding my own business, and that flying menace ambushed me. Freaky things, those are, big claws too! Don’t let them near you, kid, they are nasty. Anyway, this was a vicious one, I tried to evade it, but I came too close to the edge of the road and the next thing I knew I was tumbling down the side…”
Okay.
Mei tried to get a good look at him now that he was sitting up. He was young, maybe thirteen or fourteen years old, with almond shaped eyes and unevenly cut hair. He wore a black schoolboy uniform with a cape, now dirtied with patches of grass and mud. He seemed relatively healthy, maybe a little too skinny for a boy his age, but there was something else with his body language that didn’t sit right with her. He sat rigidly, like something was bothering him. He also had this redness around his eyes that was unmistakable.
He was still talking. “… it’s not the slide that’s truly bad though, it’s the twigs and the rocks that get in the way down, you know? And the grass gets in your mouth. It’s yucky. Hm, where could have my cap landed? Have you seen it? Ah here it is!” He reached to his back and took out a black student cap from the blades of grass, like a magician pulling a bunny out of a cylinder. “Wouldn’t wanna lose this one, it kinda makes the whole outfit. I think-”
His stomach growled loudly, cutting of his ramblings.
“Oh, you are hungry” Mei said, his face flushed slightly. “I have a sandwich left from lunch, if you want it.”
He looked at her for a second with a weird expression, but didn’t say anything, like he had to really think through this decision. Mei didn’t wait for the end of his contemplations.
She got the sandwich from her backpack. “Here” she said, holding it out to him. His stomach growled again. “Take it. It’s a mayo and egg sandwich.”
His lips curled back, clearly displeased. “Mayo and egg? Bleh. Do you not like sweet fillings or something? Sandwiches with cream and fruits like strawberry or oranges, those are the best ones! Although I like the cream part of it the most, fruits can be such spoilsports.”
“I- My mom made this for me. She always says that too much sugar with nothing to balance it out is bad for you.” She shot him a look. “She is right, by the way.”
He blew a raspberry at her.
“Do you want it or not? I can just give it to the next seagull that I see, I bet it would appreciate it more.”
He glared at her. “That’s so not funny.” But he did grab the sandwich from her hand. “I guess I will eat it then. Even if it is kind of gross.”
For somebody who was so appalled by her sandwich before, he did bite into it with a vigor of a starving child. Maybe because he was a starving child. It was a discomforting thought, but there was no denying it. This boy, despite the fact of how chatty and energetic he seemed, was clearly somebody who didn’t eat regularly. Now Mei could see that his face sunken in a little, that the hand he grabbed the sandwich with was a little too skinny.
Mei frowned as realization drawn on her. She didn’t notice it until now, but as he devoured her sandwich it was glaringly obvious. He didn’t use his left hand at all since they sat there. He pulled himself up with his right hand, reached for his cap with his right hand and he used his right hand to eat. His left was covered by his cape, barely poking out from it.
“Is there something wrong with your hand?”
He rolled his eyes but didn’t stop eating. “Yeah duh. Obviously, I broke my hand as I fell.”
She felt her eyes widen. “What? Why didn’t you say so?!”
He looked her up and down, slowly chewing. “You are a little dense even for a child, aren’t you? How old are you again?”
Mei’s jaw has gone slack. Rude.
“I’m not even going to say anything to that.”
“A lie! You just did.”
“Shut up.”
“Hm, didn’t nobody tell you you’re rude for a child?” he asked between two bites.
“Sure, I am the rude one.”
“Yes, that’s what I’m saying.”
Mei had the childish urge to pull her tongue out towards him. She decided not to fight it considering that she was still, in fact, a child.
The boy finished her sandwich, the transparent wrapper crunched in his hand.
“Thank you for the meal.” He bowed, which looked ridiculous since he was still sitting in the grass next to her. “Hmm I better get going now. You should too, kid, it’s getting late. Not a good idea to stay out at night in Yokohoma, and your mother will worry.”
He got up, trying to dust down his uniform with one hand, his other clutched tight to his side.
“Wait!”
She stood up too. “You’re still hurt, you shouldn’t go anywhere without getting your hand checked. If it’s truly broken, it needs to be set in a cast.”
He rolled his eyes. “Gee, like I don’t know that, kid.”
“I’m serious, you can’t just leave it be.” She shook her head as she picked up her backpack. “My mom’s a doctor, she works at a hospital nearby, she…well, she could help you.”
He tilted his head, watched her with that strange expression again. It’s like he was trying to see inside her brain, pick her thoughts out from her eyes. His scrutiny was a little overwhelming, Mei had to fight the urge to hide from it.
“Wha-”
“Okay.” He stared firmly into her eyes, gaze unwavering.
She thought it will be harder to convince him. “Okay. Let’s go then, the hospital is like a fifteen-minute walk from here, it’s not far.”
They had a hard time climbing up the side of the road again. One of the boy’s hands was useless and she was too small to help him properly, so they had to cling to each other in order to not slip down on the dirt and grass.
As they reached the road again, Mei looked around them. She only just then noticed that the ghost has vanished.
“I’m Mei by the way” she said, looking up at him as they walked side by side next to the river. “What’s your name?”
“Hmm? Oh, I’m Edogawa Ranpo” he said, grin stretching over his mouth again. “Nice meeting you.”