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Art had always liked sweets. From pancakes to cheesecakes, he loved all of it.
But nobody knew the reason why.
Though he had attended Facultas, Art came out of the academy without a Minimum power.
… Or so everyone thought. Until now, that is.
Nice stood in Café Nowhere with a look of disbelief on his face. “What..”
His eyes were wide and he looked absolutely mortified. “What is it?” Birthday asked, strolling over. “Did you finally find that porn magazine I hid behind the cash register?”
He peered over Nice’s shoulder, and there.. on the counter.. was.. a single animal cracker.
“Huh? It’s just a cookie. Where’d this come from?” Birthday asked, picking up the small, giraffe-shaped cracker and giving it a closer look.
“It’s Art.”
“Huh?? Whadya mean ‘it’s Art’?? It’s a friggin’ cracker dude! Or are you so obsessed with the guy that you’re seeing him everywhere now?”
“No,” Nice replied, voice shaking. “It’s literally Art. He just turned into a fucking cracker in front of my eyes.”
“Well if the cracker is Art, why doesn’t it say something??” Birthday questioned, holding the animal cracker between his fingers and giving it an intense stare.
“Um, because it’s a cracker?”
The two waited, but nothing happened. The animal cracker remained unmoving and unspeaking all the while. Soon, the others began to show up at the café and joined in around the mysterious Art-cracker. “I find it hard to believe this is even possible,” Murasaki muttered, adjusting his glasses slightly. “What’s so hard to believe??” Nice argued. “This is his minimum! He ate an animal cracker I gave him, and then he turned into one!”
At that moment, the animal cracker on the counter began to glow. It glowed brighter and brighter, and the onlookers were forced to shield their faces. “Gaahh!”
“It’s true,” a familiar voice confessed. Nice uncovered his eyes, and there, seated upon the counter, was the inspector himself. “This is why I’ve hid my minimum for so long,” he sighed, his eyes brimming with tears. “But Nice offered me that animal cracker, and it looked so delicious, so I just..”
“It’s okay Art,” Nice soothed, grabbing the crying man’s hand gently. “I still love you, even if you are an animal cracker.”
“Nice..” Art cried, sliding off the counter and pulling the brunette into a tight embrace. “Just.. promise to not eat me, okay? I know how delicious animal crackers can be, but.. I don’t want to succumb to the same fate as my brothers and sisters. I want to live a long and happy life here, with you.”
“Of course not,” Nice reassured him. “Let’s get married, Art. I can be your husband, and you can be my animal cracker.”
“Y-Yes, let’s do that. I want that too.”
“So.. how does it work?” Birthday asked. “You turn into an animal cracker if you eat one? Does it work for other foods too?”
“Just animal crackers..” Art sniffled. “Here, I’ll show you.” He reached into his bag and pulled out a small package of animal crackers. He popped one into his mouth, and then.. POOF!
Art was an animal cracker once more. The package of crackers began to fall, but Nice snapped his fingers and caught them in the nick of time.
The onlookers began to applaud. “Woo!” “Way to go Art!” “He’s a fuckin’ cracker!!”
Hajime approached the bar. She had heard the commotion and came to see what the fuss was about. “Hey, Hajime, look at this!” Nice said with a smile, pointing to the Art-cracker on the counter. “Animal cracker,” Hajime replied flatly in response, picking the cracker up and looking at it for a moment. “Yes, it’s- WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING??”
But it was too late. Hajime had eaten the cracker.
Art nearly jumped out of bed. “AAAH!!”
“W-What? What is it??” Nice asked sleepily, sitting up beside him. “It sounded like you were having a terrible dream, Art.”
“I-It was a dream??” Art gasped, breathing heavily. As he calmed down, he let out a sigh. “Y-Yes.. It was just a dream. Let’s go back to sleep.”
But as he curled up in Nice’s arms, he glanced back at the bag of animal crackers hidden in his bedside drawer. He knew that sooner or later, he would have some explaining to do. But for now, he was content. It was better this way. Nobody had to know that he was an animal cracker. At least, not tonight.