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He was trying to surprise Tunny while he was gone, and it was taking forever.
They closed on the house two weeks ago, still had two more weeks in their cramped apartment, giving them two weeks to get this place in livable condition. Not that the house wasn’t already livable, it was still nice, but after sitting empty for eight years. Or, he could assume it was empty for most of that time. It didn’t look like anyone had touched it since the summer Will helped Tunny move out, and took almost all his childhood furniture to the curb.
The house was completely empty, but still managed to have a fine layer of dust on every surface. So, for the last two weeks Tunny and WIll had spent every day cleaning it, mopping, dusting, scrubbing, getting the near decade of neglect off of it. His daughter, Prudence, stayed with Tunny’s aunt during the day. It was an amazing help, even if Sandy wasn’t too fond of WIll, or the purchasing of the house.
To be completely honest, Will used to fucking hate Tunny’s aunt. She was half the reason he started military school, so she was the reason he enlisted. She was so stupidly strict, lacked all the warmth Tunny’s parents had. But in recent years she proved herself, she proved herself to care about her nephew, and she proved to be amazing with little kids.
She wasn’t happy that Tunny bought his family’s old house back; she had spent eleven months getting it sold, only for it to end up with the family again. She didn’t like the neighborhood, said it was dirty and no place to raise a kid. WIll appreciated the care for his daughter, it was so refreshing to have any form of older family. His own family still wanted nothing to do with him, which was fine by him but he wished his daughter could have more family. His family wasn’t great but he still grew up with cousins, grandparents, he wanted a family for his daughter.
This was why Tunny bought the house.
Will had expressed this fear, that his daughter wouldn’t have enough of a family, and a month later he had bought his old house with his military pension.
So now, Will was in Tunny’s old bedroom, waiting for the paint to dry on the far wall. He was painting the whole room yellow, and he had accomplished that and now was waiting to add details to this wall.
If he left the room and started in something else he might miss when it's dry and have to add to it tomorrow, because when Tunny gets back they planned to call it a night. Hopefully Tunny had already picked Prudence up and the room would be done being painted and he could show his little girl her new room.
He sat down and evaluated the paints he had, a small can of benjamin moore pink paint, and a blue they already used in his bedroom, an orange they used for the living room, and a red they used for a wall in the basement. Most of the basement wall was wooden paneling, besides one wall that Tunny decided he wanted red.
The basement had once been their prime hangout spot, and the wall they painted was covered in awful drawings, scribbles and writing that they had done since before time. Will and Tunny met when they were eight, but the wall had already been drawn on by Tunny, and as they got older, got taller, the drawings started to get… well let’s just say, worse. Phallic doodles were nothing a little girl needed to see in her, what was Tunny? An uncle? In her uncle’s room. It was bittersweet to cover their childhood drawings, but fun at the same time. It was the first room they worked on, and it turned out great. The deep red looked amazing with the light wood paneling.
In the basement they also found old furniture that never got thrown out. A dresser that once belonged to Tunny’s father, a chest that belonged to his mother. Some things that just got left behind, miraculously. Inside the dresser was paperwork that didn’t matter, most of the clothes gone, but still enough of Tunny’s father to make him break down crying. And the chest was an old hope chest his mother had, linens that she had collected over the years for her wedding, for her family to be. There was also a small journal, delicate and white, something clearly from her own childhood. That was the second day after the house was bought, and it was a slow day to get things done. Luckily, they just were surveying, making a list of what they needed to get to get the place how they’d like it.
He held his hand out to the wall and felt it, still sticky. If he was working on a canvas, paper, skin, he’d deem it good enough to go over, but he knew it probably wasn’t there yet. So he waited, laid back on the tarped floor and looked up, watching the already painted ceiling fan as it spun.
He really loved Tunny.
That realization was a hard one to come to, and it made his chest ache.
God he fucking loved him, he needed him. He couldn’t ask for anyone else to help him raise his child, he couldn’t be more lucky. Will had been a single dad since he got partial custody of his daughter, but Tunny, and at the time his girlfriend too, made WIll feel like he wasn’t doing this alone. Tunny was always right there to help, to hold her when Will couldn’t stay awake any longer, to watch her when Will was at work, he was amazing.
Will always knew Tunny would make a good father, but watching his bond grow with his daughter, Will was nearly brought to tears just thinking about it.
Lacey, Tunny’s now ex, was a military nurse, of course she was good with kids, she was good with Prudence, and having a nurse there definitely helped Will’s anxieties. Her and Tunny broke up a bit ago, honestly Will wasn’t a hundred percent what the details were. There was no fight like there was between himself and Heather. A calm, he could only guess, discussion, followed by a calm but bittersweet dinner out which Lacey paid for. She said she’d still keep in touch, but after getting all her things from the shared apartment, Will was pretty sure she was deployed again.
Heather and him got along a bit better now though, and she was an amazing mother. Will was absolutely not trying to replace Heather with anyone, something Tunny was well aware of. Heather was just young still, and not ready to settle down. She took Prudence when she was in town, but spent most of her time traveling. She took Prudence once about six months ago, but their toddler hated it. She didn’t sleep, she didn’t behave, she was miserable, so they decided Will would just take her full time, sans the time Heather was in the city. They decided when Prudence was old enough for school Heather would consider getting a place in the city, and they’d just let Prudence pick where she was staying. Until then, this arrangement worked for the both of them, Heather didn’t want to settle down and Will’s depression needed him to.
Watching Tunny interact with Prudence and start to bond with her was half the reason Will loved him. The other half was the years they had together, they grew up together, they became who they are today, and now they are raising a child together. It made Will’s heart swell, it made his chest, himself, feel so grounded, so sure of his feelings. None of this Tunny knew, he had no idea that Will was laying on his best friend’s childhood bedroom floor, daydreaming about how much he loved him.
Of course, others cared for his daughter, Johnny had a bond with her too. But while Tunny was there when Prudence had her first cold, Johnny was over in the afternoons playing with her. Not that Will expected much more from him, honestly it was more than he expected from him. BUt since coming home from New York, Johnny was definitely more responsible. He still couldn’t imagine his friend settling down, but he was doing well. He had fully graduated from rehab, he had a good therapist and Will was pretty sure Johnny was sober now too. He was doing well for himself, so Will soaked up the afternoons where Johnny took the toddler to the park, the evenings he stayed for dinner and made eating a bit more fun for the little girl.
But it didn’t make his whole being feel like he could sob. Watching Johnny play with Prudence just made him happy, but watching Tunny with her made him feel elated. He couldn’t properly put it to words,
He knew Tunny would be a good dad, and that’s why it broke his heart to have this proven to him. One day Tunny would find someone, they’d have children of their own, and they’d be cousins to his own daughter, but it would crush him. Tunny was all he wanted to be for a dad, the perfect dad he wanted for his daughter, it broke his heart that he could never be that dad for her. Not that he expected Tunny to put his entire life on hold for the next fifteen years, but as they played house these last few months, and especially when getting the house together, it made Will long for what was just barely out of reach that much more.
Tunny was going to be there in the next three hours, he’d have his precious baby girl with him, and he wouldn’t have Tunny. Tunny was his best friend and it was so stupid and wrong to yearn for him like this and yet he couldn’t stop himself.
He came out a bit over a year ago, it was quick, for the most part it went over without any hiccups. Heather was obviously a bit upset by it, which he knew was fair; they dated for two years, had a child together, even if they weren’t together when he came out he understood. Johnny was happy for him, overjoyed to know his friend was also queer. Although he was pretty sure that wasn’t an amazing monumental thing coming from the guy who had called him slurs on numerous occasions but you know, it was better than a negative reaction.
Then there was Tunny’s reaction. Caring, compassionate, it made the worlds a difference. When he sat beside him, unspokenly told him how proud he was with just a look, when the tension didn’t clear Tunny made a confession of his own just to even the playing grounds it seemed. Tunny told him about a guy he had been seeing before, years ago at that point, but something about Tunny’s own shame, but acceptance, made Will feel so much better.
It did make Will wonder, if there was any sort of chance? But he hated himself for even wondering that, of course there wasn’t. Especially because when Tunny told him that he still had a girlfriend.
But, he spent a majority of his life despising himself for being gay, coming out to his best friends and getting a reaction that wasnt full of hate changed his world.
He sat up and touched the wall, finally it was dry, finally he could start to add the details he wanted to do.
He considered taking a pencil and sketching out the flowers he wanted to paint, but decided he could probably manage to free hand it. As he began he was able to focus, and to think. His little girl was going to love this room, it was going to be her room, hopefully for years to come.
One day he’d make enough to pay Tunny back, he’d buy the house from him and help him find a place that would fit the huge family he’d surely have in ten years, and this house would be the perfect size for Will and his little girl.
His little girl would grow up here, have a stable bedroom, have her own space, and if in ten years she wants it painted differently than that would be accomplished. But for now, he got to be a stupid dad, he got to do his ridiculous dad thing.
As he painted the flowers he created a sun, outlining the shape in blue, creating the silhouette of one. Then he got the red paint and carefully started to put words on the wall, the same words he had on his arm, the same words that helped him get sober for her.
When he was done, the wall read: “The sun is up, the sky is blue, it’s beautiful, and so are you.” It would be right above her bed, it would be the perfect motto for his little girl to read every time she came into her room, every morning when she woke up. She would never grow up hating herself like he did, she would never be able to understand the awful things he’s felt if he could help it.
He would work his ass off every day to be half the father she deserved, and it would kill him knowing Tunny was all she deserved without even trying.
He finished the flowers, the sun, the words, and soon he was putting lids back on cans, and leaving brushes and rollers to soak in the old kitchen sink.
Just as he finished cleaning up he heard the car pulling into the old driveway, it was so eerily similar to how Tunny’s dad’s truck sounded coming in, it made him smile in that bittersweet sorta way.
He went to the living room, watching out the front door as Tunny unbuckled his little girl out of her brand new big kid car seat. They got that last month, Will almost cried with how big she was already, almost three. He saw Tunny talking to her as he unbuckled her, the gentle look on his face, the way he braced himself on his good leg as Prudence took his hand and hopped out. He was so careful with her, you’d never believe the violent past Tunny had looking at how he cared for her.
Will went to get the front door, and just as he opened it Tunny gave Prudence a little push, he could just barely hear him say, “Go on, go get your dad.”
His little girl looked up at Tunny first for just a second, and then was speeding towards him, giggling. Will swooped her up, swinging her in the air before pulling her close and holding her on his hip. He kissed her forehead, smiling at her little face. She was growing into such a perfect split between her mother and father, which made sense, but it was amazing to see it happen before his very eyes. Born with starking blonde hair, as she got older, it started to turn red like his natural color. Personally, he hated it on himself, but on his beautiful little girl it suited her perfectly. She had his hair, her mother’s brown eyes, and what a perfect face.
“She was singing in the car.” Tunny said grinning, Will didn’t know if he was really walking slower than he realized, or if he was just that caught up in his daughter.
“Were you singing?” Will asked gleefully, she hadn’t spoken yet but she had gotten the hang of babbling along to a tune, not quite words but progress was progress.
“Yea, she likes my music.” He had a shit eating grin, the face of someone who knew damn well he was a bastard. “She was having a lot of fun, but she was excited to see you.”
“Were you good for your auntie?” The little girl nodded, giggling again.
“Sandy said they watched movies, she’s really liking The Little Mermaid, kept wanting it back on.”
Will laughed, rubbing his nose against his daughter’s, “Is that so? You like that she sings?” She nodded and he kissed at her face again.
“What did you get done today?” Tunny asked, Will knew he had been doing house calls for small mechanic jobs, but he made sure to not tell Tunny what his own plans were earlier.
“Finished someone's room,” He said, then he poked Prudence on the nose before putting her down, “do you remember where your room is?”
As soon as the question was asked the little girl dashed through the living room, down the hall, and to the room that was once Tunny’s. Earlier that week they fixed the latch on the door and added a wooden yellow “P” to the outside of it, making it pretty clear who’s room it was. Will would love to get it off its hinges and paint it pink to match the accent colors in the room but that was all in due time.
She struggled to get the doorknob to twist, so Tunny reached over her and did it instead, letting her push it open. The look he gave Will all too clearly said: “see, we shouldn't have fixed the latch.”
The little girl let out a soft gasp when she saw the color, it was what she picked out at the start of the week when they brought her paint cards, and clearly it met her expectations.
“You outdid yourself,” Tunny said, looking at the walls with a smile. Will could only imagine what was going through his mind, seeing his childhood room transformed into this little girl’s room.
“Only the best for her.” Will said with a shrug, “Took all day for the yellow to dry, it drove me insane.”
“It looks good, it’s nice to see the place freshened up.”
Prudence started running around the perimeter of the room, giggling and cooing as she went, clearly she liked it. The next step, and the hardest for him would be getting her her own big girl bed. She had a playpen when she was too little to sleep in bed with him, and then shared his bed with him. The arrangement worked great, but he wanted to make sure this space was her own, so a big girl bed it would be.
But for now they just watched as she zoomed around, soon leaving the room and incorporating the entire empty house into her imaginary race track. They moved to the kitchen as she ran from room to room until she exhausted herself, going straight to her father and reaching for him, making her demands clear.
Sometimes she did reach for Tunny, but usually, and very clearly, she had her eyes on her father. That made his chest ache, but in the best way possible, in the same way it did when she grabbed his finger for the first time and smiled. He knew damn well he wasn’t a perfect dad, but he thought he was doing a damn good job.