Chapter Text
Nancy Wheeler stood in her pink striped pajamas on the Byers’ porch, eyes on the frightening side of determined. She had only stopped pounding on the front door when Jonathan had swung it open, hair messy from sleep. Her mouth was already open to speak, but Jonathan beat her to the punch.
“Is Will okay?”
She shut her mouth, momentarily confused. “What? Will’s fine. That’s not – We need to talk.”
He took a breath, calming himself. Will was okay. That was what was important. So, he started on the next most important thing. “Nancy, it’s one in the morning. What can possibly be important enough for you to have – wait, how did you get here?”
She gestured back at the driveway, where Steve sat slumped in the front seat of his car, yawning widely enough to show the world his still emerging wisdom teeth.
"You woke Steve up, too?"
"You weren't answering your phone," she explained, as if this were all perfectly rational.
He yawned. "Because it's one in the morning, Nancy. Who answers the phone at one in the morning?"
"Steve."
He rolled his eyes. "Apparently." His half-awake head finally remembered Hawkins' most common cause of urgency. "Shit, we don't have more supernatural bullshit going on, do we?"
"No, actually, we seem to be okay on that front."
He leaned against the door frame and rubbed his eyes. "Then, no offense, Nance, but what do you want?"
"Is your brother in love with my brother?" she blurted.
Jonathan opened his eyes to squint at her. "What?"
"Is your brother – "
"No, I heard you. What?"
She blinked. "I don't know how to restate the question more clearly."
He stepped through the door, closing it behind him and shivering in the Indiana chill. "You woke both of us up at one in the goddamn morning just to ask me about my little brother's love life?"
"That's correct."
He knocked his knuckles against the door. "You are a menace, Nancy Wheeler."
She shrugged. "You love it."
"Less so in the middle of the night."
"Are you gonna answer the question?"
"No."
"No, he isn't in love with Mike, or no, you won't answer the question?"
"No, I won't answer the question."
"So, he is in love with Mike."
"I didn't say that."
"Close enough."
He buried his face in his hands. "Why are you doing this to me?"
She opened her mouth to say something before sighing and shaking her head. "I'm sworn to secrecy."
"Wait! Is your brother in love with my brother?"
"I didn't say that."
"Fucking close enough!" He ran his fingers through his hair. "I'm gonna kill that kid."
She drew back, clearly offended. "Wait, now you don't like gay people?"
"What? No!"
"Then why do you wanna kill my gay brother?'
"So, he is gay!"
"I didn't say that!"
"You literally just did."
She reviewed the past few exchanges in her head. "Oh, shit."
"But I don't want to kill your idiot brother because he's gay. I want to kill him because he's an idiot."
"Don't call Mike an idiot."
"You call him an idiot all the time."
"He's my idiot."
"Who's an idiot?" Steve asked, climbing the porch stairs and rubbing sleep from his eyes.
"Mike," they chorused.
Steve nodded. "Sounds about right. Why did we all get up at one in the morning to call Mike an idiot?"
"He's in love with Will," Jonathan said.
Nancy shoved him. "I didn't say that!"
"Close enough."
Steve played with the flat spot in his hair where he'd slept on it. "Didn't we already know that?"
"What?" Nancy spluttered.
Jonathan whipped his head around. "You knew?"
"Are they not already dating?"
"No!"
"Oh." He shrugged. "Mike is an idiot."
"What," Nancy snarked, "and Will isn't?"
Jonathan turned on her. "No! He isn't!"
"Ehhhhh," Steve said, "he does have a thing for Mike."
Jonathan sighed. "Yeah, he has questionable taste."
Nancy shoved them both. "Screw you guys."
"So," Steve laughed, "if they're not dating…"
"I don't like where this is going," Jonathan said.
"I do," said Nancy.
"...how do we get them to date?"
Jonathan opened the front door. "I'm going back to bed."
Nancy pulled it shut. "No, you're not."
"I'm not helping you set up our stupid little brothers, no matter how long they've been pining after each other."
"I knew it! Will's in love with him!"
"I didn't – " He rolled his eyes and opened the door again. "Fine. Yes. Our stupid little brothers are in love with each other. Now, can I please go to bed?"
Nancy shook her head and marched through the door, pulling Steve behind her. "Nope. Operation Stupid Little Brothers is a go. Do you have waffles?"
He sighed, following them into the kitchen. "Eleven lives here. Of course, we have waffles."