Chapter Text
Beca stepped out of the cab, stooping to pay the driver through the front window. The drive from the Bellas’ campus house to downtown didn’t cost too much, and this wasn’t something Beca did too frequently- it was too risky. Walking up to the curb as the cab drove away, Beca joined the line outside the club, striding confidently in heels she saved for special occasions such as these because they made her ass look fantastic.
She was groomed within an inch of her life; she and Chloe had just done their monthly “treat yourself” spa day. Waxing, plucking, manicures, pedicures, and massages helped both girls’ confidence and gave them a chance to take a break from leading the Bellas and schoolwork. Tensions were especially high in the group after the Bellas were banned from competing and performing, and began to prepare for Worlds. Beca treasured the awkward bonding time at the spa with Chloe. The luxurious day also gave Beca a convenient reason to ditch her best friend on a Friday night; “I have too much homework, Chloe, and I need to get a jump on it to be ready for rehearsals.”
Chloe never joked about the Bellas, and she wholeheartedly agreed to leave Beca alone so the other girl could focus on the work that would otherwise distract her from creating arrangements for the champion acappella group. So tonight, Chloe thought Beca was hiding in her room like a hermit, Fat Amy was off bumping uglies with Bumper, and Lily had promised not to sneak into her room through the window after the disastrous Fat Amy baseball bat incident of last year.
And Beca? Beca was standing outside the best gay club in Atlanta, getting ready to dance and trying to get lucky. She and Jesse hadn’t worked out; they worked better as friends, anyway. Jesse never took anything seriously, and as much as Beca enjoyed his jokes, she wanted someone who understood when to be serious. There was also the little issue of Beca preferring women; she identified as bisexual, but felt like she leaned a bit harder towards women.
Beca knew this about herself and loved it, but she wasn’t sure how her roommates and best friends would take it. She knew they would most likely be alright with it, but there was always a tiny possibility that someone would have a problem with it. Would they think she’d hidden it because she was ashamed? Or because she was some sort of… predator, camouflaging herself as straight for less than honorable reasons? How would her dad react? Would he think she was going through another rebellious stage?
Beca recognized that many of her reasons were internalized homophobia directed at herself, and projected onto others, but she saw these issues as hers. She was working through them, but it would take some time before she was ready to admit to others what she had only recently been able to admit to herself. In the meantime, Beca was careful about how she acted around her team, and found other ways to express her sexual identity. She consumed t.v. shows, books, music, and fanfiction featuring lesbians and bisexuals, and occasionally, snuck out to dance with beautiful women. Beautiful women who flirted with her freely and bought her drinks and made her feel sexy, and didn’t expect anything long term. For one night a month, Beca walked around with a great big rainbow flag (metaphorically) draped around her shoulders, adapting the bulletproof persona of an anonymous queer woman in a club full of other anonymous queer women.
Tonight was going to be a good night.
(The title comes from calling Atlanta, GA "Hotlanta" when I visited; see: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Hotlanta)