Work Text:
“Allura, please,” Pidge begs, “let’s cut training short today or I am going to roast. Just today! Just until Hunk and I fix the heat! Please.”
Allura is shaking her head before Pidge even finishes her sentence. She isn’t even sweating a little, because of course not.
“We cannot simply cut training short if the temperature is not ideal! I would even suggest that the heat is helpful to us, reminding us that conditions will often be even worse in battle situations.”
Lance, Hunk, and Pidge all groan, flopping backwards onto the blessedly cool tile of the training room floor. Keith and Shiro aren’t so vocal about their complaints, but neither brother looks particularly happy about continuing on, either.
“Oh, come now, lads!” Coran exclaims. “Only a varga left! You’re all chipper young people in your best health, you can make it!”
The Garrison trio groans one more time, before reluctantly getting to their feet. Shiro chugs the rest of his water patch and gets up as well. Keith shrugs off his shirt, exhaling a deep breath and standing up with everyone else.
Suddenly, Coran gasps in horror, making the rest of the group whip around to face him.
“Keith! Your back! It’s scratched to ribbons! Oh, you must have been attacked by a Drootbat on our last mission!”
“Keith, why didn’t you tell us as soon as it happened?” Allura frets, looking frantically over his back.
“It must have been a Drootbat, Allura, look! He’s turning redder than his lion.”
“Coran –”
“Oh, you’re right, Coran, that must be the fever –”
“Allura – it’s not –”
“And there’s the denial! His case has set in deeply, now, we must make the antidote at once –”
Allura and Coran rush out the door, presumably to the MedBay to make the antidote in question. The rest of the team surges forward, except for Lance (who sits on the floor with his head in his hands) alarmed voices stacking over each other as they all ask nervous questions.
“I didn’t get scratched by a Droo – whatever!” Keith yells after them, fruitlessly. “It was –” his face flushes deeper – “more recent than that.”
A collective sigh of relief rushes through the room. Pidge peeks around Keith, glancing at his back. She raises her eyebrows.
“Damn. If it wasn’t a Droot-whatever, then what the hell was it? You pick a fight with a werewolf?”
Keith sends a panicked look to Lance. “Help me,” he mouths.
Lance curls up tightly, still hiding his face. His ears are flaming. “I was the one to give Keith those scratches,” he admits meekly.
Shiro turns a scolding gaze towards him. “Are you two fighting still? I thought you were finally friends!”
If at all possible, both Keith and Lance get redder. Hunk is the first to clue in.
“Oh, my God,” he says gleefully.
Lance coughs. “We weren't fighting.”
There are several beats of silence.
“Oh my God!” Pidge screeches. “Is that why you’re sleeping better? I was wondering why I never saw you up at night anymore!”
Shiro collapses into giggles. Keith shoots Lance a look, eyebrows raised and lips quirked up. He looks satisfied with himself.
“Have you really been sleeping better?”
“You shut the fuck up. This is your fault,” Lance snaps.
Keith holds his hands up placatingly. “Sorry! I forgot they were there!”
Shiro shrieks with laughter, and Keith turns to glare at him. “Oh, fuck off! It’s not that funny! It’s not!”
But Keith’s ire only makes Shiro laugh harder, which makes him angrier, which makes Shiro lose his shit, on and on. Shiro is writhing on the floor, struggling to breathe, and Keith is standing over him, yelling, arms waving all over the place. It’s a hell of an image, that’s for sure.
Hunk sidles over to where Lance has made himself as small as possible, turning mortified eyes to the wall. A little ball of humiliation, he is.
“...Is he really that good?” Hunk asks. Pidge is pretending to look away in disgust, but her body is turned towards them and her head is tilted. She is absolutely listening in. The little shit is just as nosey as the rest of them, and she isn’t fooling anyone.
Lance groans, but uncurls to face Hunk fully. He spreads to fingers apart, showing a… significant distance between them.
Both Pidge and Hunk gasp.
“No way.”
Lance nods frenziedly. “And, like, I would never hype up a man, but oh my God, he knows how to use it.”
“Uh, yeah, no shit,” Pidge scoffs, “he really does look like he’s been attacked by a werewolf. He must have had you seeing stars.”
Lance flushes again, but nods. “Yeah. And holy shit, he treats me like a princess, after. Last night, he drew a bath and put flower petals in it. I don’t even know where he got them!”
“I would bet everything I own that you jumped him again immediately,” Hunk teases.
“Um, fucking obviously. Flower petal bath, Hunk. Unprompted. I’ve literally –”
“Will you quit fucking laughing!” Keith shouts. “You dickhead!”
The Garrison trio glances over to the brothers. “Is Shiro gonna, like, suffocate?” Pidge wonders. “‘Cause it’s been at least twenty minutes, yeesh.”
“I – I’m sorry,” Shiro wheezes. “It’s just –” he barks out another laugh, prompting another sharp glare from the Red paladin. “Whew, holy shit, okay. Sorry. It’s just that the same damn thing happened to me, and it’s endlessly funny to see you suffer like I had to.”
At the suggestion of an embarrassing Shiro story, Keith’s annoyance flees him immediately. “What happened?”
Shiro grins at him. “When I first met Adam’s parents, they damn near rushed me to the hospital the second I walked through the door because they thought I got mugged. I had bruises all over my neck and chest, and I was limping. I didn’t get mugged. I was just sore from the… early morning activities, and forgot I had hickeys and wore a low-cut shirt. Explaining that particular scenario was a nightmare, I swear.”
Shiro’s not the only one giggling anymore, everyone getting a good chuckle out of that.
“Oh, that is rough. Meeting the parents, jeez. At least it gave you guys something to laugh about?”
“No, actually, Adam’s mom fainted –”
“We have the antidote!” Allura announces, holding a bright green phial in the air. “It unfortunately has the taste of unwashed socks, Keith, but you have to –”
“It’s all good, Allura, Keith actually isn’t hurt,” Pidge interrupts. “He and Lance are just fucking.”
“It’s a little more serious than that,” Lance mumbles.
“Oh?” She looks over to the two in question, who are pointedly looking away. “Oh,” she says, grinning mischievously. “I see. Well, in that case, I suppose I can cut training short. Keith and Lance, it seems, have been exercising all night long.”
